


Breakfast and Sex

by SoThatHappened



Series: Breakfast and Sex [1]
Category: Person of Interest (TV)
Genre: F/F, Fluff and Smut, Idiots in Love, angsty fluff, shoot me, ugh these idiots have ruined my life, who wouldnt want to wake up married to root
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-29
Updated: 2017-12-25
Packaged: 2018-07-19 00:23:55
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 75
Words: 166,421
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7337116
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SoThatHappened/pseuds/SoThatHappened
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Root and Shaw have a number in Vegas, then they wake up hungover....and married?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. What Happens in Vegas...

**Author's Note:**

> This is set in the earlier stages of the relationship..

Shaw walked out of the bathroom roughly towel drying her dark hair, ignoring the agitation it caused her throbbing headache. It had been a long time since she had woken up with a hangover that she could feel in every bone of her body, it didn’t help that she had found herself passed out on the cold tiles of the lavish bathroom floor either, where she had momentarily found herself unable to place where she was. But the moment she pulled herself to her feet, and caught sight of her dishevelled reflection in the mirror it all came flooding back. Las Vegas. The number. The drinking after the number was safe.

Feeling her stomach growl Shaw decided food was the best next step, but as she turned the corner she realised she was not alone in the ridiculously large penthouse suite of the hotel. Root was asleep, spread out across the king sized bed, butt naked, a sheet tangled around her legs.

Shaw’s jaw fell open as she stared at Root from a safe distance.

 _Root_ she thought, _of course Root is here, she came with me._ But the agreement had been separate rooms, which only meant one thing. Root had decided to stay over, or this wasn’t her room. Shaking her head Shaw decided food was still the best option, either that, or she would go and find a bottle of whiskey. But as she took a step her foot met with several empty champagne bottles which clattered over at full volume.

Rolling her eyes, she quickly stepped around them and tried to tip toe away from Root before she woke up, but she was too late.

“Hey, Sameen” Root’s voice mumbled from the bed and Shaw desperately tried not to turn around.

“Root” she replied in acknowledgement but continued to make her way towards the bar. Shaw dug around the mini fridge for anything that wasn’t alcoholic settling on a packet of M&M’s shovelling several into her mouth and staring out the window at the view of Vegas.

“You’re not gonna share?” Root’s voice came from behind her and by complete habit she spun around, immediately being confronted with Root’s willowy figure wrapped in nothing but a sheet.

Shaw stared at her for a moment in disbelief. “Put some clothes on.” was all she could think of saying and of course that only made Root smirk.

“Why? Is it bothering you, Sameen? It’s nothing you haven’t seen before” she responded, toying with the layer of the sheet that fell down the middle of her body.

“It’s not bothering me” Shaw snapped, “we’re out of food and I’m starving.” She forced herself to look away from Root, annoyed that the hacker could still look so good when she was so obviously hungover.

“Are you asking me to breakfast?” Root’s annoyingly chipper voice asked from behind her.

“No, I’m telling you I’m going, and if you want to come I’m pretty sure there’s a rule against showing up in a sheet” Shaw said ditching the pack of m&ms and hunting around for her jacket.

“Why are you so grouchy Sam? We had a good time last night” Root said dropping the sheet in the middle of the floor as she began following the trail of her clothes back towards the bed.

“Enlighten me” Shaw said still searching for her jacket.

“You don’t remember?” Root called out.

“And you do?”

“Well, actually no, not really” Root shrugged as she remerged buttoning up her jeans with Shaw’s jacket under her arm. “But I woke up naked and you’re hungover so it must have been good” she smiled and held the jacket open for Shaw, who gruffly snatched it off her and tugged it on as she marched towards the door.

“I thought we talked about this Root” Shaw said waiting for her at the door as Root hopped towards the door pulling on her boots.

“Talked about what, sweetie?”

“The sex thing” Shaw said aggressively tapping the elevator button.

“You mean, the sex thing that we’ve being doing for the past six months?” Root smirked as the doors dinged open and they both got in.

“Yes, we’re done with that” Shaw said staring vacantly at the carpeted wall.

“I’m not so sure about that Sam” Root said, the lift stopping as more people got in. “I mean I’m feeling a little sore from last night, which means we’re obviously not done”

Shaw glared at her. “We’re done.”

“It’s okay to be scared, Sam” Root continued, completely oblivious to the other people that were piling into the elevator at every stop. “I mean just having sex with someone for six months is kind of crazy, and I know you don’t do feelings like everyone else but we don’t have to stop if you don’t want to, I enjoy it, I think it’s good for us”

Shaw avoided looking at the small crowd of people who were glancing between herself and Root with wide eyes.

“And besides, we’re perfect for each other” Root shrugged nonchalantly. “I have a headache” she said less than a few seconds later and pouted.

Thankfully for Shaw they finally reached the lobby floor and she practically bowled the others out of the way to escape the confined space, taking quick steps trying to walk faster than Root. But Root’s long fucking legs caught up with her in no time and she could feel the dark eyes looking at her.

“Sameen,” Root said and Shaw fixed her stare onto the restaurant that was rapidly approaching.

“It’s too early for this, Root” Shaw muttered.

“It’s never the right time for you” Root said folding her arms across her chest and stalking along beside Shaw.

“Maybe I just don’t want to talk about it,” Shaw commented and Root glared at her. “In an elevator full of people” Shaw added and Root rolled her eyes.

“It’s none of their business, Sam” Root said.

“Look, Root” Shaw came to a stop and faced Root. “We had sex for several months, and now we don’t, what is so hard to understand about that?”

Root stared at her for a moment, words playing around on her tongue as she carefully chose what to say whilst Shaw stared at her the way she always did especially after they had just had sex, there was something different about the way they looked.

“I just think there’s more to it than that” Root shrugged as if it wasn’t bothering her.

“There’s not” Shaw said, “Now can we eat without you harassing me about this or should I take you back and duct tape you to a chair upstairs?”

Root quirked an eyebrow and Shaw just rolled her eyes storming off into the restaurant. Root was close behind her and they sat down at a table without saying another word to each other. They stayed in silence until they ordered, and avoided looking at each other until their food arrived, even though Shaw felt Root’s eyes grazing across her when she thought Shaw wasn’t looking. She hated feeling like she was letting Root down, but this had never been anything other than a sex arrangement. They had both agreed to that, but now something inside her churned when she looked at Root who was so clearly bothered by their arrangement.

She looked at Root who was reaching across the table with her fork to stab a piece of bacon off Shaw’s plate and suddenly she saw it. Everything inside her stopped for a moment. Then suddenly her arm shot out and grabbed Root’s wrist with a steel grip.

“Ouch” Root gasped wiggling her wrist around trying to release it. “Sam it’s just one piece…” but her voice trailed off as she saw what Shaw was staring at.

“What is this?” Shaw asked unable to move her eyes off the sparkling ring that had taken up residency on Root’s wedding finger. “Root!” Shaw insisted when Root said nothing.

“I don’t know” Root said softly pulling her wrist away as Shaw’s grip loosened. “I was going to ask you about that.”

“About why you suddenly have a wedding ring on your finger? Because I sure as shit have never seen that before” Shaw said staring at Root.

“Well, you don’t have one” Root said, “So, I don’t know who I married.”


	2. The D Word

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay so I apparently need to desperately apologise for any confusion people had around when this fic is set (downside of writing in the middle of the night when you've taken a million antibiotics) this is in the earliest stages of their relationship, i'm literally just writing it a different way... that's why we're all here. Y'all can chill.

“You didn’t _marry_ anyone, this is Vegas” Shaw tried to shrug it off as she picked up her cutlery and focused on her food. A dull ache still throbbing in the back of her head.

“Actually, Shaw…” Root started but Shaw cut her off.

“Can you just eat?” Shaw said not knowing why she was being so defensive all of a sudden.

They remained quiet through the rest of their meal, Shaw being unable to help but glance at the shimmering rock that was on Root’s finger, wondering whether she was going to have to kill some poor bastard over this.

They stood up to leave and Shaw fished in her pocket for some money to drop on the table but her knuckle grazed something hard, quickly wrapping her hand around it she slowly withdrew it from her pocket, her blood running cold as she opened her palm and saw a golden band with a tiny glinting rock in the middle of it. Grabbing Root by the arm roughly she pulled her back.

“Root” she said staring at the ring in her palm like it was some unknown object.

Root lifted an eyebrow then caught sight of the ring, and felt a smile twitch at the corners of her mouth and the slightest feeling of relief leave her body.

“Oh, well would ya look at that” she said dropping some money on the table and walking off.

Shaw looked up and watched Root leave, she quickly slipped the ring halfway down her index finger and pushed a couple of people out of the way to keep up with Root.

“That’s it?” Shaw called out and Root didn’t stop or turn around, Shaw just kept chasing her through a maze of slot machines.

“You want to talk now is that it?” Root said eventually spinning around and Shaw slammed straight into her chest.

“This is different than just sex, Root” Shaw said holding up her index finger and waving the ring in front of Root’s face.

“That’s not the right finger” Root pointed out, “but you are right, it’s more than sex now, it’s breakfast, lunch, and dinner and sex, it’s feelings and sex, it’s hey sweetie how was your day and sex, but more realistically it’s divorce and feeling weirdly uncomfortable when we try and have sex”

Shaw frowned and folded her arms across her chest. “You think we can just stay married? You’re out of your mind”

“Now isn’t the time to discuss my sanity, Sam” Root said tucking a strand of hair behind her ear and turning around to keep walking.

“Root, c’mon, stop” Shaw said reaching out to grab her arm but missing and catching her hand instead. They both paused for a brief moment before Shaw pulled her back.

“This might not even be legit, shouldn’t we at least find that out first before throwing around the D word”

“The D word?” Root said with a small smirk and Shaw felt somewhat better that she had managed to get Root to smile.


	3. The Happy Couple

As they walked down the road Root was hyper aware of the proximity between herself and Shaw, occasionally their arms would bump together and Root would surreptitiously glance at Shaw but nothing more became of it. Their arms always bumped when they walked together, it was nothing new, it’s just that now…ugh. Never mind. Root shoved her hands in her pockets as they stopped outside a wedding chapel.

“Chapel of Love?” Shaw rolled her eyes then looked at Root. “Do you have a receipt or something?

Root stared at her incredulously. “A receipt? For our marriage? You want a refund Shaw? Or an exchange god forbid”

“I mean, I was meant to come on this trip with Reese” Shaw shrugged and felt Root shooting daggers at her. “That was a joke…”

“Oh you’re feeling funny now, Sameen?” Root purposefully turned her body to face away from Shaw and stared at the chapel.

“What am I meant to do Root, you look like you’re about to go to a funeral” Shaw said looking at Root’s back. Root stayed silent, pretending to sulk. Shaw sighed and started to walk towards the door. “Fuck it,I’m going in…coming?” She held the door open for Root who stood glued to her spot for a moment longer before marching over to Shaw and breezing past her through the door.

“Thank you, _wife_ ” she commented and Shaw froze, one foot in one foot out of the chapel as that word rung through her head, before snapping herself out of it. Facts first, she reminded herself, along with the 8000th reminder to never come to Vegas ever again with any intention of touching alcohol.

“Can I help you?” A voice called out from the office and a short man appeared with a large smile on his face. “Oh it’s the happy couple!” he exclaimed once he saw them.

Shaw and Root both looked at each other then back at the man.

“Happy’s a stretch” Root mumbled under her breath and Shaw sent an elbow into her ribs and she let out a small “ooof”.

“We just wanted to confirm,” Shaw said her eyes dragging around the ridiculously decorated chapel, “That we got married, here, last night”

“Well of course you did!” the man exclaimed “And what a wedding it was too, best all season if you ask me.”

“We didn’t” Shaw muttered. “Do you have…a piece of paper or something, any proof?”

“Better than that” he grinned “I have the video”

“The video?” Root piped up, her eyes suddenly wide.

“Yeah, come into my office I’ll show you” he said with a enthused skip in his step as he disappeared into the office. Shaw followed behind him and Root followed her. He pulled it up on his laptop and they gathered around it.

Shaw immediately felt like smashing the screen as she was confronted with the image of her with a stupid miniature white veil pinned to her messy ponytail. How did she have absolutely no recollection of this happening? As soon as he pressed play she felt her breath catch in her throat.

“I vows,” Root drunkenly slurred with a dumb grin plastered on her face. She had been wearing a bigger veil, and had a very large white t-shirt that read “I HEART VEGAS” printed across it as a makeshift wedding dress. “That I will kiss your forehead when you’re angry, and inappropriately flirt with you at work, annnnnnd not get mad when you hog the covers.”

Shaw’s throat felt dry as she pretended to look around the room whilst quickly glancing at Root’s who’s eyes were fixated on the computer. Shaw looked back at the screen looking at the horrifically drunk, yet oddly adorable and giddy versions of themselves that were swaying at the alter, holding on to each others arms mostly to keep themselves upright. She wasn’t angry. There wasn’t an ounce of anger in her body as she watched them.

“Shhh, it’smyturn” Shaw’s voice said from the screen, her words all ran together, she held a finger up to Root’s face. “I vow that I will always ask before eating the last slice of pizza, and that I will always show up to a fight even if you don’t ask me to”

“Well, I now pronounce you wife and wife” the smiling priest said, who was also the very same man that was sitting in front of them now. “You may kiss th-”

He didn’t get a chance to finish his sentence before Shaw had wrapped her arm around Root’s waist and closed the gap between them and kissing her deeply.

Shaw glanced away at this part of the video and saw that Root had done the same, she was vacantly staring at one of the framed wedding photos on the wall. Shaw looked back at the screen and saw herself still making out with Root. Then suddenly her drunken self pulled away from her new bride and yelled “WAIT, do we get the dog?” at the priest.

Root scoffed from where she was now standing on the far side of the office and Shaw rolled her eyes, pushing his laptop shut. “Okay, so we’re married.”

“I have to say” the smiling guy said, “I thought you two would be thrilled, you seem perfect for each other…in some weird, kinda dodgy way”

Shaw stared at him and Root just looked away.

“I’m feeling kind of sick” she said quietly, “I’m going back to the hotel” and with that she was suddenly gone, leaving Shaw staring the empty place where she had just been standing.

“Shouldn’t you go after her, Mrs Groves? You know…through sickness and health and all?” the guy said and Shaw slowly turned to face him.

“Mrs Groves?” the words slid out from her gritted teeth.

“Yes” the guy suddenly looked nervous.

Shaw exhaled loudly, “You let me _take her name_?”

“It was your idea ma’am” he said holding his hands up and taking a step back.

“It would _never_ be my idea” she said.

“Sameen and Samantha Groves has a pretty nice ring to it,” he shrugged and Shaw just rolled her eyes.

“Keep talking and I’ll kill you” she said and he looked momentarily terrified before he realised that she too was now gone.


	4. Root Discomfort

When Shaw got back to the hotel room she expected to find Root curled up somewhere asleep, but instead she was greeted with emptiness. Root wasn’t here. Shaw stood in the middle of the room wishing Root would just sneak up behind her and make some stupid flirtatious joke that she could deflect and roll her eyes at. But instead she left too. Walking down the hallway to where the security camera was and staring up at it, wanting to kick herself for what she was about to do.

“Where is she?” Shaw demanded staring at the little red flashing light. “I need to know.”

Minutes later Shaw burst out of the overly air conditioned hotel into the blinding desert daylight of daytime Las Vegas, dodging packs of tourists and tipsy groups of barely legals she was practically at a run down the sidewalk. The sudden determination to find Root and see if she was okay did occur to her. This was new. Or was it. Everything was different with Root, it was like some kind of hardwired instinct that she didn’t seem to know how to control or react to.

Shaw entered the Venetian jogging across the marbled floors, feeling like she had suddenly teleported to Italy, with the painted blue sky above her and the canals that ran through the hotel. She came to a holt when she finally saw Root sitting outside one of the cafes, she was wearing her glasses and her fingers were running around the edge of a whiskey glass. Shaw sat down in the chair in front of her and they looked at each other for a moment.

“You’re wearing your glasses” Shaw said and Root looked down at the table, she knew Shaw loved it when she wore them, and she wasn’t planning on telling her the only reason she had them on was that she lost her contacts at some point the previous night.

Root looked at the canal that ran by where they sat. “I’m figuring this is as close to a honeymoon as we’re going to get” she said. Shaw took the glass of whiskey from Root’s fingers and took a sip.

“I took your last name” Shaw said and looked at Root, who was finally looking back at her.

“Give it back,” Root said with a slightly playful smirk.

“Make me” Shaw answered and Root quirked her eyebrow as she reached forward, her finger grazing against Shaw’s on the glass as she pulled it back towards her.

“I meant the drink,” Root said with a smirk as she lifted it to her lips to take a sip without looking away from Shaw. As Shaw watched her closely she realised how much she liked having sex with Root, as soon as the glass hit the table she snapped out of it. “What are we gonna do, Root?” she asked, “this is not…a good idea”

“I think it’s past that, Sam” Root said, it was obvious that she was avoiding saying something, Shaw just didn’t know how to get her to tell. “We have to go back to New York in less than six hours, we’re officially married as this piece of paper proves, and there is no easy way out”

Shaw stared at the folded piece of paper that Root had slid onto the table, she knew it was their marriage certificate that Root had obviously taken from the chapel.

“When is the easy way out ever fun?” Shaw reminded Root who was looking at her in an adoring way with her soft brown eyes. Shaw swallowed hard a lump forming in her throat.

“Don’t look at me like that, Root”

“Like what?” Root asked her eyes following Shaw.

“Like…” the rest of the words didn’t make their way out of her mouth, instead she just gestured at Root’s face and tried to get distracted by the people that were walking by. “We should go.”

Shaw got to her feet, happy to change the subject to anything else. But Root was just as fast, on her feet with a hand holding onto Shaw’s arm stopping her from going anywhere.

“No, finish that sentence” Root demanded, she was looking at Shaw with more intensity now and Shaw shifted on her feet feeling the ‘Root Discomfort’ as she called it. She was silent for a moment as she contemplated saying something different from what she had been thinking, but she knew Root could tell when she was lying, so instead she looked at the taller woman her face blank and said “Like I’m your everything.” As the words slid out into the space between their bodies she pulled her arm out of Root’s grip while she was still distracted. The brief thought of running crossed her mind but she had absolutely nowhere to run to.

“And, what if you are?” Root’s voice interrupted her thoughts and Shaw turned to face her. Shaw didn’t have any words for that one, all she could do was look at the other woman, look directly into her aggravatingly soft gaze.

Root’s hand hesitantly hovered between them before she reached out to Shaw’s face and and gently touched the spot right by the bottom of her ear, letting her fingers stroke down her neck.

She stayed like that for a moment with her hand resting gently on the crook of Shaw’s neck, before closing the gap between their bodies. Root wasn’t moving fast like they usually did, Shaw had plenty of time to push her away, but suddenly she could feel Shaw’s breath on her face, their foreheads were touching, lips only millimetres apart. Shaw hadn’t gone anywhere. Root kissed her, it was slow and soft, she could taste the leftover whiskey on Shaw as she ran her tongue across her lip. Their lips pressed together firmly before slowly, slowly starting to part but only just enough for air to get between them, not that Root wanted it, her lips still grazing against Shaw’s. Then suddenly she felt Shaw’s hands on her hips, gripping her jacket pulling her as close as she could. She knew Shaw didn’t get that wild firework display of feelings that she often had in her stomach when they kissed, but such a tiny gesture made her feel so warm. Root tried to step even closer, and Shaw felt the edge of the table they had been sitting at press into the back of her legs. She kissed Root again nipping lightly at her bottom lip, enough to draw the tiniest spot of blood, before she licked it off and kissed Root on the corner of her mouth. She moved her hands up to Root’s sternum, knowing how dangerously close her fingers were to Root’s boobs, and then gently pushed the taller woman away from her, forcing her to take a step back.

“Feel more like a honeymoon now?” Shaw asked, trying to ignore the fact that kiss had been different from any kiss they had ever had.

“We’re getting there,” Root said sounding a little breathless, her eyes playfully glancing down to Shaw’s chest.

“Okay,” Shaw said rolling her eyes but feeling the corners of her mouth twitching upwards.

 

**

“So we have a few hours left,” Shaw said as they walked back down the street to their hotel, “What do you want to do that doesn’t involve alcohol consumption?”

“You” Root replied, her usual flirtatious smirk dancing across her face. Shaw shot her a glare and she let out a small laugh. “Well what’s the other option, Sam, we could get divorced?”

Shaw sighed, “Why don’t we just stay away from both those things until we are less hungover”

Root sighed even louder. “Great, now I’m stuck in a sexless marriage” she announced loud enough for several people to turn around.

“She won’t even divorce me” Root said to someone that was staring at them, Shaw pinched the side of Root’s arm hard, knowing it would leave a bruise.

“Ouch, Sam” Root pouted.

“Cut it out” Shaw said gruffly, “I’m just trying not to make this worse.”

“And what would worse be? Having fantastic sex for several hours before getting on a plane back to New York?” Root asked her face inches from Shaw’s.

“You can’t just go round consummating your marriage with the person you’re going to divorce” Shaw snapped and Root looked a little surprised.

“Is that what this is about, Sam?” Root lifted an eyebrow with a small smile appearing on her face. “You don’t want to _consummate_ our marriage?”

It was the way she said consummate, the way she dragged it out across her tongue, letting it fill her mouth and the air between them that made Shaw want to throw her against the closest wall. And she didn’t even know in which way, to hurt her, or to pleasure her.

“And what if we’ve already had sex, Sameen?” Root asked her tongue dangerously running across the edges of her teeth.

“Doesn’t count if I don’t remember it” Shaw said folding her arms. Root couldn’t help but smile and Shaw purposefully didn’t look at her.

“Can I ask you something?” Root asked.

“I don’t feel like I have a choice” Shaw replied.

“Can I hold your hand?” Root bit her lip, “Just until we leave.”

Shaw looked at her, there wasn’t one particular expression on her face that Root could easily decipher and she was about to quickly cover over her tracks when Shaw stuck her hand out.

“Fine” Shaw said, “But only till we go, or I’ll zip tie them behind your back”

“That sounds like fun” Root grinned as she placed her hand perfectly on top of Shaw’s before slowly pushing Shaw’s fingers apart with her own, interlacing them carefully. Shaw’s palm was still open, her fingers straight until Root started running her thumb over Shaw’s. They both looked at their hands and Shaw rolled her eyes curling her fingers around Root’s.

“You’re so lame” she mumbled and Root just smiled.

“So if we can’t have sex, or get divorced, what’s left?” Root asked.

“We could set fire to that wedding video, or shoot the priest?” Shaw suggested with a smirk.


	5. Who Else?

_Back in New York…_

 

“Will you just chill out?” Shaw sighed as her and Root walked into the Finch’s library. “Taking the ring off doesn’t change the fact _we are married”_

“Who’s married?” Finch asked from behind his computer.

“Uhh, you and Reese…in my dream” Shaw said quickly and spun around to glare at Root who was still insistently on keeping the ring on. “Take it off” Shaw growled under her breath.

“No” Root whispered and walked straight past her. “Miss us, Harry?”

“You were barely gone for 48 hours, Ms Groves” Finch said and Shaw rolled her eyes, throwing herself down in the nearest chair.

“I can’t imagine what I could’ve missed in that small amount of time” he continued and Root smirked.

“Got any more numbers for us, Harold?” Shaw asked trying to change the subject before Root said something stupid.

“Actually Ms Shaw, I thought you might be able to assist Mr Reese, I have a feeling he’ll be in need of some back up” Finch said and Shaw immediately jumped to her feet more than ready to hunt down some bad guys. She walked over to the door feeling Root’s eyes following her she quickly glanced over her shoulder. Root looked at her, her lips slightly parted as if she was going to say something, but Shaw slipped out the door before she could.

*

When Shaw finally got to go home she was caked in blood and bruises, duct tape holding together a wound caused from a bullet almost shooting straight through her side. Thankfully she moved fast enough, it barely hurt her, despite the stupid amount of blood. She stopped to get herself a burger before she went home, getting some strange and startled looks as she walked through the doors.

“What?” she’d asked, “You think this is bad you should see the other guys.”

It was when she’d walked back out that she realised she didn’t want to go home at all. She wanted to see Root. The only other person that seemed to understand, who would never give her that look that the room full of people at the burger place had. They didn’t get it, they never would. But Root did. Letting out a groan she backtracked towards Root’s apartment, picking the lock and letting herself in like she always did.

Root wasn’t home yet, but that didn’t bother her. She glanced around at Root’s stuff that was messily scattered all over the available surfaces and dissected computer crap all over her floor.

She tried to ignore the fact that it smelt like Root, climbing up onto the counter and pulling her burger out of the bag, shifting her focus to that instead.

It seemed like only moments later that the door swung open and Root appeared, immediately catching sight of Shaw laying on her kitchen counter.

“Hi” she said and Shaw looked over at her.

“Hi, sorry I…”

“Broke in?” Root smirked shutting the door behind her and walking into the room, Shaw noticing the new cuts and bruises Root was also sporting.

“I didn’t think you’d mind” Shaw said not making any attempt to move.

“I don’t, but my lock might, if you want a key you could just ask” Root said coming over to her.

“Where’s the fun in that?” Shaw asked and Root smiled, glancing at Shaw’s blood stained shirt and lifting it up, seeing duct tape still holding her wound together.

“You okay?” Root asked leaning closer to Shaw’s face, and Shaw just nodded. “Good.” Root said and instead of kissing her like Shaw was anticipating Root took a bite from the burger that was still half eaten in Shaw’s hand.

“That still needs stitches though” Root said investigating the burger bag and shovelling some fries into her mouth.

“No it doesn’t, it’s just a graze” Shaw said watching Root closely.

“I’ll do yours if you do mine” Root smirked lifting an eyebrow and Shaw sat up ignoring the pain that shot through her side.

“Where?” She demanded and Root paused, licking some salt off her finger and then pulling her shirt off and turning around so Shaw could see the reddened scratches across her back.

“Have you been having cheating on me?” Shaw asked hopping off the counter and walking over to Root, carefully running her finger along one of the scratches. Root flinched at the cold touch of Shaw’s fingers.

“If you count an electric barbed wire fence as competition,” Root said and Shaw frowned. “It just needs to be dressed, and unfortunately I can’t reach.”

Shaw sighed “Fine. Bathroom, now.”

Root followed Shaw into the bathroom, grabbing the medical kit and swinging her legs into the bath perching on the edge. Shaw got out the antiseptic and a cotton pad and looked at Root’s back. “This needs to go” she said loosely snapping one of Root’s bra straps against her shoulder.

She could feel Root smirking despite the fact she was facing the other way, Shaw was surprised she didn’t make a comment.

“Anything else, Doctor?” Root asked dropping her bra at Shaw’s feet and she rolled her eyes. Spoke too soon. Typical.

“Yeah, find something to bite on because this is gonna sting” Shaw said and without any extra warning swiped the cotton pad across one of Root’s scratches. Root gasped loudly at the cold fiery pain that shot across her back, her fingers gripping the side of the bath firmly.

“D-do you think they’re gonna scar?” Root asked through clenched teeth trying to distract herself as Shaw kept going.

“Doubt it” Shaw replied from behind her, “And even if they did, scars are hot.”

“Yeah, I know, ” Root replied, “You have quite the collection.”

Shaw rolled her eyes and stood back to look at the angry red marks, seeing whether she had missed any.

“I’ll come back tomorrow and change the dressing” Shaw said covering them up loosely with gauze pads. “You might want to give it a minute before putting a top on that’ll aggravate the dressing.”

Root turned around and lifted an eyebrow. “Sounds an awful lot like an excuse to have me topless while I stitch you up, Sameen”

“I can stitch myself up” Shaw said, but Root reached for the needle before Shaw did.

“Lay down, Sameen” Root said “And take your shirt off”

Shaw pulled off her tank, thankful the wound was down far enough that she could leave her sports bra on without interference. Root sterilised the needle and pulled on a latex glove, letting it snap against her wrist.

“Is that why you came over? You wanted _me_ to stitch you up?” Root asked pulling the duct tape away from the wound with her ungloved hand.

‘Don’t flatter yourself” Shaw grumbled.

“I mean I guess that’s why people get married, to have someone to put them back together after a bad day” Root continued, and Shaw wasn’t even sure whether it was a conversation anymore. She rested her head against the tiled floor and shut her eyes as she felt the needle prick her skin.

“Maybe it isn’t such a big deal, being married, people are probably just scared of the word, but it’s really no more commitment than we had already been putting in, we see each other everyday, we have sex, I flirt with you, you shoot people who try and kill me, what else is there really?”

Root stopped threading the needle through her skin and Shaw cracked her eyes open.

“Was that rhetorical?” she asked and Root just laughed.

“I’m just saying, Sameen, maybe this wouldn’t be so different, and besides who else do we have?”

Shaw felt the prick of the needle going back through her skin and she watched Root, the little frown between her eyes as she concentrated, knowing Shaw would make a fuss if it wasn’t straight. Root tied the knot, quickly applying the dressing and gave a satisfied little smile as she pulled the glove off and dropped it into the bin. Shaw sat up and found herself very close to where Root was still sitting on the floor.

Shaw looked at Root who was still occupied putting away the medical supplies, not noticing the distance between their faces. Shaw’s eyes wandered down Root’s profile, following her jaw line with her eyes, wanting to run her fingers down that slender neck, her eyes moving down to Root’s bare chest, her nipples perfectly erect from the cold. Shaw realised she was staring and looked back up at Root’s face and found the other woman looking straight at her.

Neither of them spoke, a loose strand of Root’s hair had fallen over her face and Shaw swept it behind her ear before getting to her feet and picking up her blood soaked shirt.

“I’ll get you a new one” Root said leaping up and brushing past Shaw into her bedroom, returning moments later wearing a loose practically see through white tank and holding a t-shirtfor Shaw, taking the blood soaked one from her and tossing it into the bath.

Shaw pulled on the top, it was a little loose but she didn’t care. It smelt like Root. She walked into the other room and grabbed her jacket off the couch.

“I should go” she said and Root just stared at her.

“You don’t have to” Root said quietly, and Shaw opened Root’s front door.

“I should” was all she could say before slipping out, desperately trying to erase the image of Root standing there so vulnerably looking like a lost child.

**

When Shaw got home she grabbed a beer from her fridge despite having zero desire to actually consume any alcohol at all. She leaned back on her couch and shut her eyes. Then suddenly realised it was probably the first time that her and Root had slept in their own places in months. Their little sex agreement had often resulted in them spending the night at each others places. And whether she wanted to admit it or not she had become used to having the company. Her place felt weirdly empty without Root.

“You can’t do this” she said to herself. “You can’t just get married, you’re a sociopath.”

Shaw hated the fact that she felt so conflicted about this. She didn’t want to be married, but she wasn’t too fond of the idea of divorcing Root either. But she couldn’t stay married. She couldn’t. She abandoned her beer on the counter and went to bed instead, making a mental note to take Bear back to her place.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thoughts? feelings? thank you for your support.... I can't seem to stop writing #trash


	6. Breakfast and...

The next morning Shaw went to the gym that was two blocks from her apartment, she knew it was a bad idea with her fresh stitches and all but really, despite what Root said it was just a scratch. She didn’t know how long she had been here for. She had woken up before the sun and failed all desperate attempts to go back to sleep, so after cleaning all her weapons, and much to her own surprise cleaning out her fridge she decided the only option left was the gym. Shaw wanted to do anything except confront the situation she was currently in, and if any new numbers came through she would happily take them. Although much to her disliking it had been a quiet few weeks. So she had made a power shake, and hit the gym.

She had been in front of the same punching bag for probably an hour now, sweat was pouring from her body, her muscles were finally starting to ache, but her vision was fixed on the punching bag. Stretching out her knuckles she carefully curled her fingers back up, and steadied the bag. Her aiming was precise, her timing was perfect, she was focused, but more importantly she was distracted.

Then like clockwork, out of the corner of her eye she saw someone come into the room. It’s probably just some stupid guy wanting to spar, she told herself. But somehow she wasn’t convinced, she glanced at the person again and this time she saw Root. Swinging her arm out to hit the bag she missed, for the first time in her life, and the bag swung towards her catching her across her stitches and slamming into her gut. She quickly grabbed the bag to steady it and sucked in a long deep breath as she felt one of the stitches pop.

“How’d you know?” Shaw asked her breath still ragged from the workout.

“ _She_ told me you were here,” Root replied walking over, “So last night was weird.”

Shaw sighed and stared down at the ground. “Root…”

“Sam” Root said and let out a small breath.

“Stop Root, I know you want to talk about this but…” Shaw started but Root cut her off.

“No, Sam, you’re dripping blood on the mat” Root said and gently reached out and wiped the blood up Shaw’s side so it would stop dripping, her breath catching as her fingers grazed across Shaw’s warm damp skin, feeling her breathing, and her tight muscles. She was in tiny workout shorts and a sports bra, and despite the fact she was covered in sweat and was dripping blood, to Root she looked irresistible.

“Shit” Shaw muttered lifting her arm to examine the wound to her side, and instead of swatting Root’s hands away she just pointed at her gym bag. “There’s a gauze in there and some tape”

Shaw felt Root’s hand move off her side and wished that somehow she had kept it there. Root grabbed the gauze and placed it over Shaw’s stitches carefully, using her teeth to rip the tape she carefully placed it around the edges, then looked at Shaw.

“Don’t say it” Shaw said seeing the worry on Root’s face and knowing she was about to be scolded for exercising with a wound. “So, did we get a new number or something, or did you just come here to interrupt my workout?”

“She says you’ve been here for hours, and I just wanted to see if you were hungry?” Root said. Shaw lifted an eyebrow.

“There’s always time for breakfast” Root shrugged and Shaw just sighed.

“Fine, but I want pancakes” she said and Root smirked turning towards the door. “Chocolate chip, and don’t be stingy” Shaw called out after her.

Shaw went into the changing room to clean herself up and pull her clothes back on. Letting out a frustrated sigh. So much for distraction she thought, as she swung her bag over her shoulder and started walking up the block to Root’s.

The door was left slightly ajar when she arrived, and she almost smirked knowing Root only did that so she wouldn’t pick the lock again. She kicked the door shut with her shoe and dumped her bag beside it, she could smell pancakes, but she couldn’t see Root. Walking over to the kitchen she saw a pancake in a sizzling pan and glanced around for Root, then picking up the spatula and flipping it over so it didn’t burn. When she turned around again Root was there, she had her bunny slippers on and was wearing that same see through tank, with no bra.

“Are you trying to start a kitchen fire?” Shaw asked and Root grinned.

“I had to pee” she said innocently and Shaw rolled her eyes. “Anyway, pancakes are almost done, and there’s coffee” Root said biting into the end of a strawberry with one hand and with the other pointing at the pot of coffee sitting on the table beside two empty mugs.

“Strawberries as well?” Shaw lifted an eyebrow.

“No, those are mine” Root said lifting it out of Shaw’s reach.

“What’s yours is mine, unless you signed a prenup” Shaw smirked and walked over to Root using two fingers like pincers against Root’s stomach and making her squeal with laughter, lowering the strawberry so Shaw could take a bite right from Root’s fingers.

“That’s not fair, Sameen” Root exclaimed as she turned back to the pan and flipped the pancake onto a plate.

“Which part, the strawberry or the prenup?” Shaw said satisfied, as she poured the coffee into the mugs and automatically added one sugar to Root’s.

“You” Root frowned spinning around with a plate of pancakes and meeting with Shaw who was holding Root’s coffee. They stared at each other for a second before Shaw reached out for the plate and Root reached for her coffee. They sat down at the table and Shaw sighed.

“Well maybe you should tell me…” but her sentence was cut off as she shovelled a forkful of pancake into her mouth and moaned. Root quirked her eyebrow in amusement as she watched Shaw and slowly bit into another strawberry.

“When did you get so good at breakfast food?” Shaw asked and a smile twitched on Root’s lips.

“Do you want me to make a marital joke or tell you I’ve been practicing?”

“You’ve been practising pancakes?”

Root took a sip from her mug.

“Damn and I thought you couldn’t get any nerdier” Shaw said and took another mouthful.

“It was mostly for my own sake, but I guess it paid off” Root said defensively, then paused for a moment before asking, “so what was it you wanted me to tell you?”

Shaw looked at her in confusion.

“Before your foodgasm, you said…” Root reminded her, and Shaw suddenly realised, putting her fork down and taking a sip of her coffee.

“I was going to say, maybe you should just tell me what it is you want” Shaw said only looking at Root for a brief moment before resuming her pancake shovelling.

“I thought that was obvious, Sam” Root said a frown flickering across her forehead.

“You want to stay married,” Shaw looked at her,“to me, a sociopath, with no feelings?”

“You know that’s not how I see you” Root said and Shaw rolled her eyes.

“It might not be, but it’s the truth, Root.”

“I don’t think so” Root shook her head definitively, “You may have been that way once but I don’t think that’s true anymore, at least not with me”

“Root” Shaw rubbed her forehead where a frown was stuck between her eyes. “Sociopaths don’t just fall in love when their soul mate arrives”

Root was quiet. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“It means I can’t love you, despite how you feel about me” Shaw said and watched the emotion wash over Root.

“But you care about me?”

“Do I?”

Root glared at her, obviously hurt. “Stop being so cold Sameen, it’s obvious you feel something or else you would have signed the stupid divorce papers already”

Shaw stared at her.

“Maybe you’re just _scared_ ” Root said and Shaw’s jaw clenched.

“I don’t get scared”

“Maybe not of guns or bad guys, but maybe you’re scared of yourself because you realise you can actually feel something for once” Root said her eyes were rimming with tears “And you don’t know how to deal with that.”

“That’s not true” Shaw said getting to her feet.

“Don’t lie” Root said glaring at her from the table.

“I’m…” _not_ , Shaw swallowed hard unable to finish that sentence. Root stood up and folded her arms.

“What is it that makes you come here Sameen? That makes you want to stitch me up, or kill people when they’ve got a gun to my head? It sure as hell isn’t because you don’t have a single feeling inside your sociopathic little heart, something inside there _wanted_ to get married to me, despite the fact we were drunk, you wanted to, or it wouldn’t have happened.” Root said, her voice was low and there was the slightest tremble in her words. Shaw knew she was angry, and wished she could make it stop, but she didn’t know how, she didn’t have that urge that other people do to console or comfort. But despite that, she thought she would try.

“Come here.”

Root looked at her confused, wiping a tear off her cheek.

“Come. Here.” Shaw repeated her voice was almost like a soft growl.

“Why, are you going to shoot me? Would that make it easier for you?” Root asked taking a step forward anyway.

“Shut up” Shaw said and pulled Root into her, wrapping her arms around the taller woman and taking a deep breath. She didn’t know whether this would help, but it was what normal people did when someone was upset right? Even if she wasn’t all that great with empathetic touching, maybe for Root it would help.

“What are you doing?” Root asked and it sounded like she was crying and laughing at the same time, as she wrapped her arms around Shaw. But before Shaw had a chance to answer she felt Root’s hot tears hitting the crook of her neck.

“I don’t care that you don’t get it Sameen, I need you” Root said softly her words muffled against Shaw’s skin. “And I want you, but you won’t even…” her voice trailed off and she forced herself to pull away, quickly wiping her tears and taking several steps back.

Shaw stared at her for a minute. “Root, I don’t want to hurt you because I can’t be _normal._ ”

Root stared at her in silence, absolutely still, then finally broke, using both her thumbs to wipe the tears off her face, then turned to pick up her mug of coffee, taking a sip and wrapping her fingers around it in comfort. Shaw could only watch.

“You asked me to tell you what I want Sam, and now you’re just fighting against me because you can’t admit that I’m right” Root said her voice level. “I think you should go.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> potentially being way too generous with these updates, but also I still can't stop writing so why not :p


	7. Welcome to Feelings

“I don’t want to” Shaw protested refusing to move from where she stood.

“Then tell me I’m right, tell me anything that will make me believe you are the person I know you are” Root said folding her arms and leaning back against the kitchen counter. Shaw didn’t know what to say, she stared at Root for what felt like endless minutes.

“This blows” she said finally, and Root just rolled her eyes and looked towards the door. “No, I mean this feels like shit.”

Root immediately looked back at her.

“Maybe you’re right” Shaw shrugged, “Maybe I am scared, but why the hell would I want to admit that? Why would anyone want to admit that.”

“Because I’m right here, Sameen” Root said “Even if it doesn’t feel like it”

“It does feel like it” Shaw mumbled.

“So talk to me, sweetie” Root took a step forward, Shaw tried to look away from her but couldn’t.

“There’s something wrong with me Root” Shaw shook her head, “And one day you’re not going to find it so cute anymore”

“Don’t tell me what I’m going to feel, Sam” Root frowned. “That’s my business.”

Shaw shut her eyes, as if it would somehow remove her from the situation.

“So you don’t feel things the way other people do, I _know_ that, and truthfully Sameen, that’s what makes you so beautiful” Root said.

Shaw had her hands stuffed in her pockets as she stared up at the ceiling.

“This whole talking thing is kinda tiring” she said and Root almost laughed at her blunt deflection.

“Welcome to feelings” Root smiled.

“No thanks.” Shaw said.

Root suddenly tilted her head to the side, a tiny frown appearing between her eyes as a focused look spread over her face. Great timing, Shaw thought to The Machine as Root touched the back of her ear.

“Harry’s going to need us in half an hour” Root said and Shaw gave a sharp nod.

“Good, I need to shoot something” she said.

“Get on the bed” Root said suddenly and Shaw stared at her.

“Why?”

“If we have sex you’ll feel better, normal again” Root shrugged.

“Is that how it works?” Shaw lifted an eyebrow, “didn’t we just…”

“It doesn’t…” Root sighed “It doesn’t matter”

“It matters to you” Shaw said and a small smile appeared on Root’s mouth.

“We’re gonna be fine” Root said vaguely and grabbed Shaw’s hand leading her into her bedroom.

“This seems like a bad idea” Shaw said but before she could say anything else Root’s hands were on her waist and their mouths were pressed together. Shaw let out a slight groan as her thought from one second ago was immediately forgotten and she moved in closer to Root.

“Half and hour, Sameen” Root mumbled against her lips and Shaw immediately tugged her top off then her pants, Root quickly followed and then pushed Shaw down onto the bed, straddling her hips.

“Sex,” Root said in between messy kisses, as she ran her hands up Shaw’s muscular arms, “relieves a lot of tension, especially after fights.”

“Shut up” Shaw said her hands tangled in Root’s hair pulling the woman closer to her, locking their mouths together so their wasn’t room for words.

Root grinded down against Shaw, her hands running up Shaw’s stomach and over her breasts catching her erect nipples between her fingers and smiling against Shaw’s lips, as Shaw let out a tiny moan.

“The endorphins are pretty much the same as when you eat chocolate,” Root mumbled and Shaw’s fingers came up to trace her lips.

“You gotta stop” Shaw murmured and Root bit down on Shaw’s fingertips, Shaw tipped her hips up into Root and the air that came rushing from Root’s mouth loosened her grip on Shaw’s fingers enough for her to free them. She wrapped her arms around Root, reaching down carefully avoiding the wounds on Root’s back and grabbing her ass.

Root smiled and leaned down to kiss Shaw, sliding her tongue into her mouth exploring it as if it were the first time it had been there. But Shaw wasn’t in the mood for foreplay, her tongue crashed against Root’s fighting for dominance.

Root’s hands wandered down Shaw’s body, dragging slowly, building the tension between them whether Shaw wanted it or not. Then finally slipped one finger into the waistband of her briefs. She toyed with it for a moment before slipping the rest of her hand down, the warmth and wetness greets her fingers, and she idly half fingered Shaw whilst kissing her deeply, so that there wasn’t air for Shaw to so much as protest. Shaw groaned underneath her trying to buck her hips up, but Root kept herself firmly on top.

“Do you want more, Sameen?” she whispered eventually.

“Yeah” Shaw’s voice had gone hoarse, deep and husky.

Root pressed inside her, letting the moan from Shaw’s mouth fill hers as she kisses her again.

“Open your eyes” Root told her, their lips still touching. Shaw opened her eyes and stared at Root, her pupils dilated as she added another finger.

“Keep looking at me” Root demanded and leaned down claiming Shaw’s mouth again, their eyelashes practically touching as Root licked the top of her mouth before pulling back, dragging her teeth across Shaw’s bottom lip. Shaw didn’t move her eyes off of Root. Her fingers crept under Root’s panties across her ass.

“Hands where I can see them” Root said and Shaw groaned as Root kissed down Shaw’s jaw.

“Root” Shaw frowned and Root stopped, until Shaw quickly brought her hands up above her head and interlaced her fingers. Root smirked, and fucked Shaw hard. Her forearm moved forcefully between their two bodies, as she kissed down Shaw’s neck, biting occasionally, licking along her collarbone and then eventually reaching her nipples. Catching one between her teeth and running her tongue around the rim, once, twice, then she stopped and changed sides. Her fingers still moving fast, her forearm tense. She sucked Shaw’s other nipple slowly, then kissed around it, taking pleasure in hearing Shaw moan, feeling her chest rise and fall heavily underneath her. Shaw’s fingers came unlaced as one hand reaches up to grab the headboard, Root glanced up admiring the rippling muscle of Shaw’s upper arm. She reached up with her free arm and interlaced her fingers with Shaw’s other hand.

“Do you want to feel how wet I am?” Root whispered and Shaw just moaned, bucking her hips into Root’s hand.

“Let me…” Shaw tried to say but Root cut her off with a kiss.

“No” Root said against her lips.

Root moved herself so she was slightly off centre, and Shaw immediately took the opportunity moving her thigh so it slipped perfectly between Root’s legs, she could immediately feel Root, hot and sticky against her leg. She groaned.

“That’s cheating” Root murmured, Shaw could feel Root’s body heat against hers, she could feel her breath quicken, her eyes still open she watched Root’s eyelashes flutter as she drove her thigh up again in-between Root’s legs.

“It’s not” Shaw demanded running her tongue across her teeth with a small smirk that Root caught.

Root’s hand abandoned Shaw’s on the pillow and came up to her neck, her long elegant fingers with black painted nails wrapped around it as she leaned down and bit Shaw’s earlobe.

“I saw that” she said, sucking on her earlobe and licking down her neck.

“Choke me then” Shaw said with a glint in her eye and a slow groan as Root’s fingers grazed across her g-spot. Root smirked.

“We don’t have time” Root said biting on Shaw’s shoulder, and quickened her pace. “But if you want more…” she slowly slipped a fourth finger in and Shaw’s back immediately arched underneath her.

“Root….the….holy fuck” Shaw managed in-between breathy moans.“That’s fou- fuck….I’m gonna…” But before she finishes that sentence Root gave a final demanding thrust which threw Shaw over the edge into the whirling void of pleasure, every muscle clenching, tightening, throbbing, until she falls limp. Her breath was ragged and fast, she shudders slightly as Root’s slick fingers grazed over her clit on the way back up.

“I know you could have held out longer if I asked, but we made pretty good time” Root said and kissed Shaw’s lips before sitting up, still stranding Shaw’s one thigh Shaw could automatically feel the wetness pressed against her leg.

“What about you?” she asked and reached out to Root her fingers trailing down her stomach.

Root smirked and rocked her hips slightly against Shaw’s leg. “We have to go.”

“Harold can wait” Shaw said, and Root made no attempt to get up. Instead she dropped her hands to either side of Shaw’s body and pressed herself against Shaw’s leg. Her cheeks were flushed, and her lips pink and parted. Shaw watched her face, their eyes were locked.

“You want to touch me?” Root asked still moving against her leg, she dipped herself down and dragged herself across harder.

“Yeah” Shaw’s reply was more like a small breath.

“You technically are” Root smirked breathlessly, “And I can tell you find this hot.”

“Maybe” Shaw said unable to take her eyes off Root, who’s fingers were starting to grip at the sheets.

“Shall we play a quick game?” Root asked before a soft gasp escaped her lips. “I’ll use your body, but you can’t touch me with your hands”

“That’s not fair” Shaw said.

“Hands against the headboard” Root demanded and Shaw found herself obliging. Root rocked against Shaw’s leg, her moans slowly becoming more frequent, then she repositioned herself, directly over Shaw’s pelvic bone. She lay down on top of Shaw their faces inches from each others as she grinded down hard and fast, the warmth of her breath caressing Shaw’s face. Her movements got faster and faster and Shaw thought she was about to come, but then suddenly she stopped. Her cheeks flushed, her eyelids fluttered as she stood up, pulling her panties off and then getting back on the bed, but this time she knelt above Shaw’s chest.

“I said no hands, I didn’t say anything about tongue” she said with mischievous look in her eye.

“Get closer then” Shaw growled and Root slowly moved up until she had one leg on either side of Shaw’s head. She lowered herself down until she was abruptly met with Shaw’s mouth, letting out a louder moan than she had wanted to. Shaw ran her tongue over her, through the wetness, sucking gently, letting Root moan and grip until she was white knuckled onto the top of the headboard. She flicked her tongue against Root’s clit and Root whole body tensed, before she slipped it inside her, feeling Root try and move against her mouth, but she was in charge now. But not for long, Root was practically on the edge already, as she pushed her tongue deeper she felt Root’s thighs tighten against her head, a loud moan filled the room, and then her mouth was filled.

Root climbed off her and collapsed down next to her, her breathing fast.

“Is it just me or did you get louder?” Shaw asked wiping her mouth with the back of her hand.

“Only for you” Root said with a smirk, then suddenly it faded and she rolled over, practically onto Shaw’s arm.

“What?” Shaw asked.

“Sam, I think we just…” She started and Shaw just stared at her blankly. “Consummated our marriage” she finished slowly.

A look of registration suddenly crossed Shaw’s face and she glanced up at the ceiling before looking back at Root.

“I’m sorry, Sam” Root said frowning “that was totally my fault.”

“It’s fine, Root” Shaw said and sat up.

“Where are you going?” Root asked sitting up as well.

“We’re late” Shaw said grabbing her clothes from where she dropped them on the ground.

“You seem…bothered” Root pouted.

“I’m not” Shaw said.

“Well do you feel better?”

Shaw turned to her “Annoyingly so” she said almost smiling.

Root bit her lip and felt relief wash over her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Did someone say breakfast and sex? ;) Well that certainly took a turn, but does it actually mean anything is resolved between them both? Emotions are tough ground.
> 
> So, who wants more ;)
> 
> I very much appreciate all of your lovely comments and support <3


	8. The Exception

When it was time for Shaw to go home she didn’t even consider going to Root’s despite what had happened that morning. Bear trotted along beside her on his leash that was loosely hanging around Shaw’s wrist. She felt content with having him beside her. The dog she cared about, she thought. Now that wasn’t so hard to admit was it Sam? She asked herself and glanced down at Bear who’s tongue was happily dangling from his mouth. It hadn’t been a hard bargain convincing Harold to let her take him, he had clearly sensed something was wrong because she hadn’t even needed to threaten him. He had simply nodded, and given her a short list of instructions for his care, all of which, she already knew.

She didn’t care for her apartments pet policy, her place as hardly much of a home anyway. Her mattress was thrown on the floor of a rather empty room, which Root had once deemed “very artistically pleasing”. She had a fridge, a TV, a couch, and some coat hangers. And now she had a dog.

She hadn’t spent a lot of time with Root today, they had individual missions for which she was strangely glad about. Usually she didn’t mind following Root around all day armed with guns, but today she was grateful for the space. Although she had been stuck with Reese for a few hours, of which for some reason he had decided to keep prying into the Vegas trip, asking strange questions like “How was the trip?” to which Shaw had mumbled “pretty lame.” Less than half an hour later he had asked about Root to which Shaw had spun around to glare at him.

“Why don’t you ask her that?” she had snapped and Reese had barely lifted an eyebrow at her sudden hostility.

“You two just seem…” he gave a nonchalant shrug as he peered through the eyehole of the sniper rifle.

“We seem what?” Shaw said crouched behind him loading several different guns.

“Well I mean, you just seem” he paused “conflicted.”

“Conflicted?” Shaw echoed.

“If you want to talk about it” Reese had tried but suddenly he felt the barrel of a gun pressed to the back of his head, Shaw standing over him.

“Don’t make me shoot you” her tone was beyond bored, and that was their conversation over. She had briefly wondered whether Reese even knew the half of what was going on between them, but figured quickly she didn’t really care, as long as she didn’t have to go through the torture of _talking_ about it with him. And when Reese wasn’t trying to ask her awkward questions she had unwillingly found herself thinking about the other woman anyway, she tried to imagine what it might be like being _married_ and thought about what Root had said when she had been stitching Shaw up. She thought about what her life had been like pre-Root, how well versed she had once been at taking care of herself. Keeping to herself. Not letting anyone too close. And then she thought about how the last few months had been, she would end up at Root’s without thinking twice about it. She would get a shot to the shoulder and let Root stitch her up despite the fact she was more than capable, if not miles better than Root was when it came to medical.

She thought about the way Root looked at her, Shaw saw that look everywhere, on dozens of other people everyday. That was the look. The look she could never give Root. The look that said, I love you and I care.

She thought about how insistent Root was that she didn’t care that Shaw couldn’t feel, and how adament she was that Shaw was different. But the problem Shaw realised was that she couldn’t verify that. She couldn’t tell Root what she wanted to hear, she couldn’t tell Root that yes, she had changed, because she didn’t know. And what she didn’t know, could hurt Root. Would hurt her. Maybe it wouldn’t straight away, but one day Root would hate her.

There was no way that this marriage would work, it was doomed from the start. Shaw wasn’t cut out for this. She couldn’t force herself to be something that she wasn’t.

Her fingered played with the ring that she kept in her jacket pocket, tracing the edges that she had already memorised.

It was easy shooting people, she knew they were bad guys. It was harder when it came to your own life. But she could only assume, she was the bad guy, and Root was the good guy in this scene. And Shaw protected the good guy, and took out the bad.

*

As Shaw opened the door to her apartment Bear immediately wrenched away from her, his strength enough to pull his leash out of Shaw’s hand as he bolted through the door. Shaw watched him in confusion as she pulled her jacket off and shut the door, looking up and she saw Root on her couch and Bear happily trying to lick her face.

“Well that was disloyal” Shaw grumbled and Root turned around, Bear seizing the opportunity to put his paws on her knees and reach forward to lick all the way up the side of her face. Root’s nose scrunched up, and an adorable smile stretched across her face as she tried to wrangle Bear back onto the ground.

“I have Chinese” Root said using her foot to point at the takeaways that were sitting on the coffee table in front of her.

“Okay” Shaw said disappearing into the bathroom to check her stitches. Root got up from the couch and awkwardly hovered in the middle of the room, sensing the tension in the air between them.

“Are you okay?” she called out and a crash from the bathroom came in response.

“Don’t ask me that” Shaw replied moments later.

“You just didn’t seem normal today” Root said “Even for you.”

Shaw reappeared pulling her tank back down over her freshly dressed stitches. “And what does my normal look like, Root?”

Root pursed her lips and folded her arms staunchly across her chest, her face relaxing into a deadpan. “Root,” she said, her lips the only thing moving, “I’m going to shoot you if you don’t shut up, and not in the kneecaps.”

Shaw lifted an eyebrow at Root’s impression. “Okay, not bad” Shaw shrugged and Root kept her arms folded. Shaw walked past her to the coffee table, examining the contents of the various takeaway boxes and picking up a pair of chopsticks.

“Do you mind that I’m here?” Root asked turning to face Shaw.

“No” Shaw replied focused on the food.

“Would you tell me if you did?”

“You’d be outside on your ass if I did.”

“Are you-”

“What’s with all the questions, Root?” Shaw asked falling back onto the sofa and digging her chopsticks into a box.

“I don’t know” Root frowned, “I feel like you’re mad at me about this morning”

Shaw stopped eating and restrained herself from rolling her eyes. “I told you it was fine.”

“Doesn’t mean you meant it.” Root said and Shaw groaned. “See you are mad.”

“Root,” Shaw scolded. “If I’m angry that’s because it’s my default and it’s got nothing to do with you.”

Root finally sat down beside Shaw and picked up the other pair of chopsticks. “I need to know.”

“Know what?” Shaw asked in between mouthfuls.

“If we’re getting a divorce or not” Root said, “because you seem to be making a bigger deal out of this than me”

“That’s not true” Shaw deflected.

“It is, Sam” Root said more softly, “and I can’t figure out why that is.”

“What does it matter” Shaw said not looking at her.

“Sameen,” Root put both her food and the chopsticks down.

Shaw knew there wasn’t any escaping this now, so she turned towards Root. “So maybe it has something to do with my parents” she shrugged, “their marriage seemed, more than just a mutual agreement, it was….I don’t know deeper than that, or maybe it’s because of you, and what you think about this” Shaw stared at her chopsticks, and Root could feel her heart beating in her chest. “Or maybe it’s just because I’m going to hurt you and not be able to do anything about it.” Shaw said and sent her box of noodles skidding across the coffee table out of frustration.

“You never talk about your parents” Root said quietly, not daring to reach out and put a hand on Shaw’s knee as much as her fingers itched to.

“Nothing has to change, Sameen” she said, “I promise.”

“What if it does?”

“Then we’ll figure it out” Root said her dark eyes fixed on Shaw’s face.

“And if we can’t?”

“Shaw, stop it” Root said “At least we would have tried, our drunken selves seemed to think this was a world class idea, and they say your intoxicated self is just an exaggeration of you…so”

“I don’t know who said that but that science is definitely dodgy” Shaw said glancing at Root who just sighed, beginning to wonder if there was any point bothering anymore. Every time she tried to convince Shaw, she only got shut down.

“Maybe your axis II has an exception” Root said deflating against the back of the couch. Shaw looked at her expectantly.

“Me.” Root said, her fingers twisting her wedding ring round and round her finger, slowly working it up towards her knuckle. Shaw watched her in silence, staring at her fingers, watching the ring slowly creep further and further from where it had comfortably sat at the base of Root’s finger for days now.

“Don’t do that” Shaw said suddenly and Root’s eyes widened a little. “Just, leave it there.”

“Really?” Root asked trying to bite back a smile.

“Pass me my noodles,” Shaw replied.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> How are we feeling??? Did Shaw just make a decision??? Are they actually going to stay married? HOLY CRAP.   
> ...I'm actually a solid 2.5 chapters ahead in writing this so you will have lots more coming, I've also been at work today and I had a fantastic idea ;)  
> I love seeing your reactions, thank you for the lovely support! I'm at niehaus-vause.tumblr.com if ya need me!  
> And as always let me know what you think, feel, want to see, or scream about :p


	9. Nothing's Changed

“Holding hands will not cause collateral damage, Sam” Root said her legs happily swinging as she sat perched on the edge of the kitchen counter, watching Shaw pour cornflakes. “And if it does, I will personally clean it up.”

“How big of you” Shaw said “but it’s still a no.” Shaw shoved a spoon into one of the bowls and turned around to pass it to Root.

“Please, baby” Root said with an irresistible pout and flutter of her eyelashes. Shaw rolled her eyes.

“Don’t do that” she said and Root’s innocent look immediately twisted into a smirk.

“Do what?” Root asked wrapping her legs around Shaw’s waist before she had a chance to move. Shaw stared at her in disbelief holding her hands above Root’s legs, purposefully not touching her.

“Pretend to be cute so I do what you want” Shaw said as Root tipped some milk into her cornflakes with a cheeky smile still catching the corners of her mouth.

“I am cute” she demanded.

“No,” Shaw said “You’re a psychopath.”

Shaw watched as Root began to lift a spoonful of cornflakes up to her mouth, and then quickly pressed her fingers between Root’s legs at her centre, watching Root immediately splutter dropping the spoon back into the bowl with a splash, milk dripping down her chin.

“And now you’re a loser” Shaw said breaking free from Root’s legs as they loosened around her. There wasn’t a lot to get used to having Root around her every morning. It was like Root had promised, nothing much had changed from how they had usually operated. Except for the fact she kept catching Root staring at her, like all the time. Which she always had anyway, but now it was the look, and so Shaw always pretended to ignore her, like she never saw it. It had been almost three weeks now since they had gotten married, and neither of them had killed each other yet. It seemed promising to Shaw.

“We’re gonna be late” Shaw said as she started pulling her clothes on “Can we take the bike?”

Root smirked as she wiped the milk off her face. “You’re not gonna come when I rev the engine again are you?”

Shaw glared at her. “I didn’t come,” she protested.

“Okay” Root licked the spoon and hopped off the counter.

“Can I drive?” Shaw asked pulling her jacket on.

“No” Root said firmly, “because then what will you fantasise about all day?”

“Torturing you” Shaw shot back and Root grinned.

“You know I’d like that.”

“Murder.” Shaw said waiting by the door, “yours specifically.”

“How sweet” Root said pulling on her jeans and boots, fetching her leather motorcycle jacket off the back of a chair and then grabbing both the helmets, tossing one to Shaw.

“Don’t you think we should tell Harold?” Shaw asked as they bounced down the stairs to the garage.

“But it’s our little secret” Root said close behind Shaw, so close that Shaw swore she could feel Root’s breath on her neck.

“It’s not exactly _little_ ” Shaw pointed out.

“Secrets are fun” Root said and Shaw sighed.

“He’s going to find out sooner or later, and so are Reese and Fusco” Shaw said.

“How do you know?” Root asked.

“Because you’re always goddamn staring at me” Shaw said whirling around to face Root as they reached her motorbike.

“I’ve always stared at you, Sameen” Root said with a smile and leaning in to give her a kiss, but Shaw blocked her by pulling her helmet on with a vaguely amused smirk.

“Just means you can’t hold my hand at work” Shaw said with a nonchalant shrug as she climbed onto the back of Root’s motorbike as Root just stared at her taken aback.

 

Root got a message from The Machine halfway to Finch’s telling her that Shaw was needed near the west side of Central Park, and so without warning did a U turn in the middle of the road, her leg so close to the ground the friction almost ripped through her jeans. She pulled over when she saw Reese standing on the sidewalk waiting. Shaw tried to get off as quickly as possible, but it wasn’t before Reese caught sight of where both her hands had been sitting on Root’s upper thighs. She moved her hands immediately seeing the look he was giving her, and leapt off the bike pulling off the helmet and tossing it to Root.

“Good morning,” Reese said but it sounded more like a question than it did a statement.Shaw didn’t answer, she felt Root’s eyes on her back as she walked towards Reese.

“Sam” Root said and Shaw felt obliged to turn around, where Root was sitting on her bike. She took a few steps back towards Root and stared at her blankly.

“What?” She said and Root just stared at her, with those goddamn puppy dog eyes, all chocolate brown and melty. “Don’t you dare kiss me.” Shaw growled through gritted teeth.

“What if I want to?” Root said her voice quiet so Reese wouldn’t hear.

“You’ll lose a finger” Shaw threatened and Root simply tucked a strand of Shaw’s loose hair behind her ear with her leather gloved hand.

“And how would that benefit you, sweetie?” Root asked and Shaw just swatted her arm away.

“I’m going.” Shaw said and turned away from her, feeling her eyes still tearing holes in her back.

“Good to go?” Reese asked and Shaw just nodded.

“Have a good day kids” Root called out from behind them, her engine suddenly roaring to life, then suddenly it revved again, and again, the engine growling loudly, the sound ripping through Shaw’s body. She turned around slightly at the deep throaty rumble looking at Root who gave her a satisfied smirk before driving off.

“I hate her.” Shaw muttered and Reese just chuckled.

“Sure you do.”

*

When Shaw and Reese returned to Finch’s they found Root standing in front of the computer screens, her hands tucked into the back pockets of her jeans. Shaw cleared her throat and Root spun around immediately.

“Where’s Finch?” Reese asked leaning his rather large gun against Harold’s desk.

“Here,” Harold called out from the library and Reese followed the sound of his voice out of the room.

“Did you have fun shooting people?” Root asked walking over to Shaw.

“It was great,” Shaw replied well aware of their meaningless conversation as Root got closer, and closer to her.

“I wouldn’t” Shaw warned glancing at the narrowing gap between their bodies.

“Or what, Sameen?” Root asked her hand coming up to Shaw’s jaw as she slowly leaned in, but Shaw pulled away, and less than a second later both Finch and Reese reappeared in the room. Shaw awkwardly took a few steps away from Root.

“You two are acting very strange lately” Finch didn’t hesitate to point out and Shaw just rolled her eyes.

“Maybe it’s time to send Root to the psych ward again?” Shaw asked and suddenly felt a sharp pain in her arm, as Root belted her with the nearest book.

“It’s not just her, Ms Shaw” Finch said looking between them as he sat down.

“Yeah Sameen,” Root said playing into Harold’s questions, “You have been acting strangely…it’s almost like you _care_ ”

Shaw stared at her unblinking, silence filling the space around them all.

“She definitely needs a trip to the psych ward, Harold” Shaw said finally and looked away from Root who half smiled.

“Are you dating or something?” Reese’s voice suddenly interjected and again the room went quiet, Harold’s eyes widening at the abruptness of the question, even Root looked slightly caught off guard.

“Or are you just sleeping together?” Reese asked looking solely at Shaw, who was just looking fed up.

“Mr Reese” Harold chastised “Ms Groves and Ms Shaw’s personal lives should be none of our concern”

Reese glanced at him with a wicked smirk spreading across his face. “But they’re bringing it into the workplace”

Root opened her mouth to protest, looking like a guilty school child in the principals office, she wasn’t used to being caught. Ever.

“Shut up, John” Shaw sighed.

“Am I wrong?” Reese asked and Shaw looked directly at him.

“Yes” she replied.

Reese glanced at Root for a second confirmation and she just nodded.

“Okay well now that terribly awkward conversation is out of the way, does anyone want to get back to work?” Harold asked.

“About time” Shaw grumbled, not being able to help briefly looking over at Root who was still looking mildly confused about what had just happened.

*

Later that day Shaw found herself handcuffed and stuck in the back of a police car, it wasn’t anything she hadn’t dealt with before. If anything just a slight annoyance, that was slowing her down from getting a password back to Finch. A password that she didn’t have, because she got arrested and her guy had disappeared into a crowd of people. She was untwisting a paperclip in her fingers when suddenly the car door opened and Root was dangling the keys in front of her.

“I’m fine” was all Shaw said as concentratedly guided the paperclip around the cuffs to find the hole that would set her free.

“FBI, you’re in my custody now” Root shrugged and Shaw just rolled her eyes.

“You’re ruining my fun” Shaw protested as Root took her arm and helped her out of the car, pulling the paperclip from her fingers and dropping it on the ground but making no attempt to free her hands.

“Keys, Root” Shaw said rotating her wrists around the cuffs irritatedly, but Root wasn’t listening.

“John knows” Root said.

“I told you we should tell them” Shaw said glaring at the keys in Roots fingers. “But you like secrets” Shaw reminded her.

“When they’re still secrets, Sam, not when everyone already knows” Root said turning Shaw around and pressing her with more force than necessary against the car, enough for Shaw to emit a soft grunt as the metal slammed into her. Root slowly took the cuffs off and Shaw pulled her hands free immediately.

“That was uncalled for” Shaw pointed out and Root just slid the cuffs into the back pocket of her jeans.

“I’m keeping these for later” she said and then looked at Shaw with a frown. “What are we going to do?”

“Gee, I don’t know Root, maybe we could just tell them” Shaw said as Root lifted the police tape for them to duck under.

“What if they don’t take it well?” Root asked as they began to walk down the street, and Shaw began to wonder if the only reason Root had gone to all the trouble of bailing her out was so that they could have this conversation. It didn’t seem unlikely, especially for Root.

“Who gives a fuck” Shaw shrugged and when Root stayed quiet she looked over at her. “What?” Shaw asked “you do?”

Root looked guilty. “They’re our friends Sameen, and we don’t have a lot of those.”

“Jesus Root, you have enough feelings for both of us” Shaw said shaking her head.

“It’s just… sudden” Root tried to shrug it off nonchalantly.

“Is it?” Shaw asked “You tased me and I shot you, then we got obsessed with each other, it’s been happening for a long while now”

Root smiled “You’re obsessed with me?”

“Not the point” Shaw sighed.

“That’s a yes” Root grinned.

“How did that sound like a yes?” Shaw asked.

“You deflect when you pretend something isn’t true” Root said.

“Everyone is just trying to wind me up today” Shaw said and shook her head, stuffing her hands into her pockets, her finger crashing against her wedding ring as if to prove her point.

“See, you’re doing it again” Root sounded annoyingly perky.

“You’re hot and you’re good with guns, that doesn’t mean I’m obsessed with you” Shaw pointed out, Root tried to hide her swooning by biting down hard on her lip.

“I think that’s exactly what it sounds like, and plus, you married me”

“You married me first, and also you haven’t kissed my forehead once and I’m _always_ angry” Shaw said purposefully keeping her eyes straight ahead, not engaging Root was sometimes more fun than it should be.

Root stared at Shaw in awe that she had even taken notice of their drunken vows, it was…so uncharacteristically adorable, Root thought as she stared at the woman beside her who was expressionlessly staring at the sidewalk ahead of them. Suddenly she couldn’t help herself, grabbing Shaw by the arms bringing her to a stop so they were facing each other, and Shaw had no choice but to look at her, her face still neutral as ever.

“You’re right” Root admitted and took Shaw’s face in her hands before placing a light kiss on her forehead while Shaw stared off to the side trying not to roll her eyes.

“So lame” Shaw said giving her a light shove as she kept walking.

“If I agree to telling Harry and John, will you agree to something?” Root asked falling back into step beside Shaw.

“Depends.”

“Grocery shopping” Root said.

“Seriously?” Shaw asked, “No.”

“Sam, one of our places needs actual food that’s not just leftover takeout” Root said “And besides, we could pretend we’re normal people for 20 minutes, it could be fun”

“Grocery shopping is not fun” Shaw pointed out.

“But you love food” Root argued back.

Shaw thought about it for a moment, it was barely anything that Root was asking for especially in return for wanting to tell Harold. She sighed.

“Fine, but we’re getting pizza tonight _after_ we tell Harold” Shaw demanded and Root smiled.

“We’re pretty good at this” she said chirpily.

“What?”

“Marriage” she said.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So marriage, maybe they won't be so bad at it after all?? But it can't be that easy....can it?  
> That was a super long chapter because you're all fantastic!   
> Let me know what you think! xo


	10. Broken Vows

Harold looked between the two women expectantly. Shaw sat sprawled out on the chair opposite where he was sitting at his desk, and Root was hovering to the side her hands nervously jammed in the pockets of her leather jacket.

“I always find that these things go better when words are involved” he said his eyes bouncing between the two of them with both suspicion and anxiety.

“Don’t you want to bask in the glory of Root’s silence? Shaw asked doing her best to control a smirk that was trying to appear on her face.

“Quite the contrary Ms Shaw, I find her silence to be…rather daunting” he said and looked at Root. “It takes more than a vast amount of effort to render Ms Groves silent.”

“I agree” Shaw said drumming her fingers on the arms of the chair. “Like a couple of bullets to the head, or trying to deliver big news to people she thinks are going to judge her.”

Harold looked confused as he glanced at Root who was now sending annoyed glares at Shaw.

“Ms Groves” Harold said snapping her attention back to him, “if you think I’m going to judge…”

“We’re married” Root suddenly blurted out, the words bursting off her tongue and echoing throughout the room. Shaw lifted an eyebrow at the abrupt delivery.

“You’re…what?” Harold said quite obviously shocked, his eyes wide behind his round frames.

“Married.” Shaw said getting to her feet, taking a couple of steps closer to Root and unsentimentally whacking her ass to make her jump. Harold watched in disbelief.

“To each other?” he clarified.

“That seems to be the case,” Shaw said with a shrug and glanced at Root who was staring at Harold as if she were willing him to say anything that would ease her mind about what he thought.

“There’s even a _video_ ” Shaw said deciding she may as well get as much amusement out of this situation as possible. The inability to feel awkward definitely had its moments.

“A video” Harold could only seem to echo as he tried to process what he had just heard.

“Oh, and then there was the consummation” Shaw gave another nonchalant shrug. “That part wasn’t so bad” she said looking towards Root with a smirk.

“Ms… Shaw I really don’t think” Harold tried but Shaw quickly cut him off.

“I took her name too” she quickly added, “So I guess that makes me, well, what does that make me, Root?” Shaw said moving closer to Root so their faces were barely an inch apart. Root suddenly realised how close Shaw was to her face, trying not to inhale the dark bittersweet scent of her skin. She cleared her throat.

“Mrs Groves” the words left her lips in a breath.

“Something like that,” Shaw said turning back to Harold.

“And when did this happen?” Harold asked finally getting himself together.

“That part is less important” Root said.

“Vegas” Shaw said at the exact same time and they looked at each other, as Harold again looked between them in search of more direct answers.

“ _Vegas_?”

“Are you angry, Harry?” Root finally found her voice to ask.

“Angry?” Harold repeated, “The only reason I would even remotely feel any aggrievement towards this would simply be because I was not invited to see two of my dear friends get married”

“See Root? It’s fine” Shaw said “Now pizza.”

Both Harold and Root looked at her and she just rolled her eyes.

“What?”

Shaw looked at Root who seemed to be gazing at her with some kind of dreamy eyed thank you.

“You’re really married” Harold said with a shake of his head, a smile slowly starting to spread across his face.

“Indeed,” Shaw confirmed moving closer to Root with the intention of dragging her out so they could go home and get food, but Root as usual misinterpreted Shaw’s movement and took her hand, interlacing their fingers together much to Shaw’s immediate horror.

“And now we can hold hands at work” Root said almost grinning ear to ear.

“Okay, let’s go” Shaw pressed down as hard as she could with her fingers on Root’s knuckles, despite how warm her hand was, and despite how well it fit with hers, they were NOT holding hands.

“I have to ask” Harold said and Shaw almost groaned. “How long has this been going on for?”

“Since she tried to iron me” Shaw said quickly and started to drag Root towards the door. “Now we really have to go, do…married people things”

“Like grocery shopping” Root said excitedly and Harold looked mildly confused as Shaw continued to drag Root away.

“Night, Harold” Shaw called out.

“Okay… congratulations?” Harold replied.

 

*

 

“Sam” Root shouted, the volume of her voice enough to make Shaw stir from where she was comfortably asleep on Root’s bed. Their bed. Whatever.

“Sam, wake up, _now_ ” Root demanded, and suddenly there was a sharp jolt underneath her and she was falling, unravelling, and then seconds later hitting the floor with a sharp thud. Her eyes snapping open she lay there for a few seconds trying to register what had happened, but before she could sit up Root was towering above her.

“I’m going to kill you.” Root said and something about her tone didn’t sound playful at all. Shaw groaned and pulled herself up looking at the nest of bedding that had ended up on the floor with her.

“Can you make it fast?” Shaw asked glancing at the clock then brushing past Root, yawning loudly as she made her way to the bathroom.

“No I won’t” Root snapped and Shaw turned on the water in the shower, pulling off what little clothing she actually had on. “It will be slow, and painful, and…” Root appeared in the doorway her eyes widening when she saw Shaw in front of her, naked, with one arm stuck out under the water in the shower testing the temperature. “What are you doing?” Root almost gasped.

“What does it look like?” Shaw asked.

“You…I was just…you _can’t do that_ ” Root demanded and moved closer attempting to reach around Shaw to turn the water off, but Shaw just grabbed her arm and stopped her. Their bodies so close Shaw could feel the thin fabric of Root’s top grazing against her nipples, immediately making them stand out.

“I can do whatever I want” Shaw said and without hesitation placed a quick kiss on Root’s lips before stepping into the shower. Root stared at her dumbstruck.

“No” she tried protest, but Shaw pulled the glass door of the shower shut in her face. “Sameen, I am not okay”

“What’s wrong?” Shaw asked tipping her head back under the hot water and letting it run over her head and hair. Root blinked several times trying not to let herself get distracted.

“You hogged the covers, _again_ ” she said folding her arms firmly across her chest.

“I’m asleep Root, what you want me to do about it?” Shaw said.

“I was freezing” Root said the irritation creeping back into her voice.

“So move closer” Shaw countered back, glancing at Root who had a tiny frown on her forehead and a strongly clenched jaw, her mouth a tight line. Shaw lifted an eyebrow as she watched Root wondering if she was about to throw a tantrum.

“Saaaaam” Root whinged loudly “It was fucking cold.”

Shaw didn’t know why she found Root so amusingly cute when she was mad like this, and this particular morning Shaw did a horrible job at hiding it, to the point where she had a full smirk displayed on her face for Root to see.

“Stop. Smirking.” Root growled throwing the shower door open letting the cold air rush in and surround Shaw’s body, but she just moved under the stream of water still unable to get the look off her face.

“Sameen, I mean it” Root said gripping the door with her perfect black painted finger nails.

“Hey, I haven’t done a thing” Shaw said and suddenly Root snapped, lurching into the shower the door slamming behind her, trapping them both inside the glass box she caught Shaw’s body against her own and forcefully pressed her up against the glass wall of the shower.

The ice cold glass against Shaw’s body sending an unexpected pleasure rippling through her, feeling Root pressed firmly against her back.

“I do _not_ like being cold” Root growled in her ear as Shaw’s breath started fogging up the glass.

“Are you cold now?” Shaw asked.

“Shut up” Root taunted pressing herself further against Shaw, getting her arms and splaying them up against the glass near her head, lacing her fingers through Shaw’s over the back of her hand. Root’s white shirt was now thoroughly soaked, with the hot water spraying directly onto her back in a steady flow, the thin fabric clinging to her skin.

“I should trap you in an ice bath” Root threatened biting down on Shaw’s warm wet shoulder, hard enough to leave marks. A soft hiss escaped Shaw at the sudden prick of pain that she so annoyingly enjoyed.

“Or I’ll cuff you to a saltire cross, naked, and leave you there overnight” Root said her lips moved against Shaw’s skin as she spoke, her teeth dragging across her shoulder. Shaw repressed a groan, not wanting to give Root the satisfaction yet.

“Or you could fuck me while I’m asleep and keep both of us warm” Shaw suggested her voice husky.

“You want to be fucked?” Root asked “Is that is, Sam?”

Root trailed her tongue up Shaw’s neck and bit her earlobe, whilst slowly moving her hands off Shaw’s dragging her fingers slowly down Shaw’s arms, over her taught biceps, across her shoulders, one hand stopping to rest, the other moving to the base of her hairline, her fingers taking a firm grip at the roots of her hair before yanking her head back, towards her own shoulder. Root noticed the smile at the edges of Shaw’s mouth and pulled her head to the side kissing the stupid smile off her face roughly, her tongue pushing into Shaw’s mouth giving her a messy and wet kiss. What Root failed to anticipate was by loosening her grip on Shaw’s arms it freed her, Shaw taking the moment of Root’s distraction and spinning around driving her back against the other side of the shower, backing her into the wall, pinning her there by putting a hand firmly on either side of her head.

Their kiss deepened, Shaw drove her knee between Root’s legs and felt the gasp bubble on her tongue, then she pulled away.

“Still mad?” Shaw asked.

“Furious” Root replied.

*

By the time Shaw managed to free herself from Root’s arms and get out of the shower she was wet, hot, breathless and so goddamn hungry. She couldn’t even remember if she’d washed her hair or not during any of that 40 minute shower. Pulling her clothes on she padded into the kitchen feeling rather dazed from spending that long under the heat of the shower. She crouched in front of Bear who happily wagged his tail and licked her face as she scratched his ears, unable to help the smile on her face whenever he clambered all over her.

The next stop was food, except the only thing in the cupboard was an empty cornflakes box, groaning in frustration she slammed the cupboard door shut, and her eye caught the pizza box from last night that was sitting on the bench. Without thinking she lurched at it, grabbing the last slice and taking a bite. Food. Finally.

Root emerged from the bedroom mid hooking her bra up, her damp hair sticking to her bare skin across her chest and shoulders. She stopped in her tracks when she saw Shaw and suddenly the frown was back on her face again. Shaw took a second to realise what she had done and then immediately wiped her mouth.

“Shit” she mumbled and thrust the half eaten pizza towards Root “Do you want this?”

“No” Root snapped “But thanks for asking” sarcasm dripped off her voice as she spun on her heel and disappeared again.

Shaw glanced at Bear who was staring up at her expectantly.

“Mommy’s grouchy” Shaw said to him before tossing him the piece of pizza.

“What did you just say?” Root annoyingly stuck her head around the bedroom door, staring at Shaw.

“Nothing” Shaw said with a shrug. Root huffed loudly, several loud banging and crashing sounds following before she reappeared fully dressed, pulling on her leather gloves with only one helmet wedged under her arm.

“Where’s mine?” Shaw asked and Root stopped to stare at her.

“You’re walking” she announced.

“You’re not serious” Shaw said and Root lifted her eyebrows.

“You _stole_ the covers, and then you ate the last piece of pizza without even fucking asking” Root reminded her and Shaw rolled her eyes.

“You’re the one who got mad at me for hogging the covers, Root” Shaw pointed out and Root narrowed her eyes. “You’re not allowed to do that.”

“Fuck you” Root frowned.

“You just did” Shaw said with a satisfied smirk.

“I want to push you through that wall” Root said glancing at the wall behind where Shaw was standing in the living room.

“Go for it” Shaw said stepping towards Root so close her words brushed over the other woman face, as she grabbed the helmet from under Root’s arm.

“Let’s go, _honey”_ Shaw said sarcastically.

 

*

 

“All I’m saying, Sameen, is that it wouldn’t kill you not to roll yourself into the blankets like a burrito every night” Root’s voice echoed through Finch’s place announcing their arrival before they were even in the room.

“I can’t control what I do when I’m asleep Root, why don’t you just get another blanket” Shaw groaned.

“That’s beside the point, I shouldn’t have to” Root was feeling argumentative that much was glaringly obvious this morning.

“Then sleep on the couch” Shaw said trying to end the conversation.

“You sleep on the couch” Root shot back, “Oh but wait, that’s too close to the kitchen and you might _eat the last piece of pizza_ in your sleep too.”

Shaw rolled her eyes as they walked into the room, Harold was sitting at his desk their arguing clearly having disrupted him from his work as he looked between the both of them with an eyebrow lifted.

“Everything okay with the newly weds?” Harold asked.

“Peachy” Shaw replied and Root just glared at her.

“Please tell me I get to shoot things today, Harry, otherwise it might end up being Sameen here” Root said folding her arms across her chest.

“Trouble in paradise?” Reese said from behind them and Shaw sighed.

“Numbers, Harold. Now.” Shaw demanded.

*

Before Shaw went to leave with Reese she caught Root’s arm pulling her to the side away from Harold and the computer screens.

“You’re not actually still pissed are you?” Shaw asked.

“Why? Are you worried about me Sam?” Root bit her lip.

“No” Shaw replied “It’s just tiring when you’re in a mood.”

“Well maybe I’ll just have to make it up to you later” Root said lowering her voice, glancing across the room making sure Harold was distracted before leaning in and catching Shaw’s bottom lip between her teeth.

“Maybe a nice couples counselling session?” Root added pulling back, flashing a cheeky smirk at Shaw before sauntering back over to Harold.

“What was that about?” Harold asked without even turning around. Shaw rolled her eyes and walked towards the door hearing Root reply “she just wanted to tell me how much she enjoyed the last piece of pizza, I could kill her.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am having too much fun with this, my god.  
> It's almost like ....they've been married forever, bickering and all! Not to mention Grouchy Root, ugh my heart.  
> What do you think?  
> Also holy crap...suddenly we're at 10 chapters already....how did this happen.....


	11. When She's Gone

When Shaw got back from her run with Bear that night she was surprised to find that Root wasn’t home. She hadn’t seen her _wife_ since this morning at Harold’s, and a brief conversation during the day halfway through an attack of Decima agents, but even then Root had sounded distracted with something else. It was nothing more than a quick heads up seconds before they appeared, and then a briefer apology seeing as it were her fault they had found Shaw in the first place.  
 ****

“I know you can handle yourself, sweetie” Root had said before their line had disconnected.

But now the apartment was abnormally silent aside from the sound of Bear lapping up water messily in the kitchen. Shaw wondered where Root had gotten to, figuring she was still working on a cover somewhere for The Machine. Figuring it was nothing to worry about she jumped in the shower to wash the sweat off, then collapsing on her bed and moments later falling asleep, not realising how tired she truly was.

Shaw stirred in the middle of the night, bringing herself half to consciousness her eyes fluttering in the darkness of the room. Her hand automatically reaching across the bed, grazing across the sheets and finding the other side of the bed still cold and empty. Her jaw clenched and she wondered whether Root had gone to her own place for the night, and beyond that thought she tried to ignore the rest, knowing Root was more than capable of taking care of herself. Annoyingly, she could almost get herself out of any situation. She’ll be fine, Shaw told herself shutting her eyes again. But for some reason, she wasn’t convinced.

*

When she woke again with light flooding in through the window there was still no sign of Root, Bear was still peacefully napping on his bed when she wandered into the kitchen to make herself coffee. She looked around the apartment for any sign that the hacker had snuck in while she had been asleep, but everything much to her frustration was exactly where she had left it.

Once she had gotten changed she grabbed Bear’s leash and stood by the door.

“Bear” she only had to say his name once and his ears pricked up, turning his full attention to her and bounded across the room to her feet.

“Looks like we’re walking today, buddy” she said hooking his leash onto his collar and letting him pull her outside.

As she walked to Harold’s she contemplated how dependent she had become with Root, feeling a quiet rise of anger bubble in her stomach. So she was married, okay. But she had never let this happen before, and she didn’t know how to stop it, or even if she could. Wanting to kick herself at the realisation that perhaps alone was not something she was ever going to be anymore, and even more, maybe she was okay with it. Or maybe she had strayed so far from herself that she had simply forgotten how to be by herself.

“Bear” Harold exclaimed, pleasantly surprised at the sight of the dog running towards him once they had arrived.

“He missed you” Shaw said watching the dog sniff around Harold’s shoes wagging his tail happily.

“I missed him too” Harold said patting Bear’s head.

“Have you seen Root?” Shaw asked pretending it hadn’t been the first thing that had wanted to come out of her mouth as soon as she had walked through the door.

“I haven’t” Harold said looking over at her unable to hide a slight concern. “But Sameen, you have to remember her relationship with The Machine is …well it’s intimate”

“Intimate?” Shaw echoed in distaste.

“Poor choice of wording” Harold frowned “However true, I can only imagine she is on her own mission at The Machine’s request”

“What if she’s in trouble?” Shaw folded her arms.

“The Machine always looks out for her.” Harold said.

“And if it doesn’t? The Machine can’t shoot a gun, Harold, it can’t kick someone in the teeth”

“And for good reason, Sameen” Harold reminded her “Ms…Root can take care of herself, she has done since she was 12”

“Harold” Shaw said her voice slightly lower than usual “She’s my _wife_.” She almost wanted to vomit from her own words, the term still sounded so ridiculous and foreign in her mouth, and sounded almost completely false to the ear. But it was true.

Harold almost looked as startled as Shaw felt at the use of the word.

“I need to know where she is, at least” Shaw said trying to sound reasonable.

“I don’t know” Harold said “and She won’t tell me either.”

“But She knows?” Shaw asked.

“Yes.” Harold said “And as long as She knows, then Root must be okay.”

“I don’t know if that’s good enough for me, Harold” Shaw said and Harold frowned.

“I know you’re concerned Sameen, but unfortunately there are still people who need our help” Harold said softly. Shaw stared at him, weighing her options, before letting out a defeated sigh and throwing up her hands.

“Fine” she said knowing that bothersome itch that was her _wife_ wouldn’t leave her alone, but until she could do something about it she may as well help Harold. “What’ve we got?” she asked.

*

“This is not happening.” Shaw demanded.

“Something’s definitely happening” Reese said unable to hide his amusement from where he sat, and Shaw shot him a glare.

“No” she protested “I can’t do it.”

“Sameen” Harold said trying to sound somewhat sympathetic in a tight, curve hugging, extremely short black dress, armed with one stiletto in each hand.

“No, Harold” Shaw jabbed a heel in his direction “I quit.”

“In Root’s absence, Sameen, I really don’t have any other choice but to ask you to take this cover” Harold explained and Shaw just stared at him incredulously.

“Are you looking at me, Harold?” Shaw asked.

Harold sighed. “The Machine thinks you’ll be fine.”

“The Machine thinks wrong.” Shaw said.

“C’mon Shaw, what’s wrong with being a billionaires escort for the night?” Reese teased and she ran her finger down the edge of the stiletto heel feeling how sharp it was.

“I might actually murder someone” Shaw groaned “Or myself.”

“Sameen, if it’s any consolation we won’t have to be there long” Harold said pulling on his ridiculously overpriced jacket that matched the rest of his three piece suit. Shaw gritted her teeth in anger as she used Reese’s head to steady herself as she frustratedly pulled her heels on.

“Where am I going to put my gun?” Shaw said and Harold produced a small black clutch for her.

“Great, accessories” Shaw rolled her eyes snatching the purse from Harold’s hands.

“At least it matches” Reese smirked and Shaw whacked him over the head with it.

*

Their number was a key speaker at some ritzy gala dinner that they were attending, under the alias of a billionaire software developer. Prevent the assassination of the key speaker, were the words Shaw repeated over and over in her head to distract her from the absolutely traumatic social situation that she suddenly found herself in. She quietly cursed at Root for not being here to take this cover, before quickly stopping her brain from thinking again about where Root was, and even more, ignoring the fact it had almost been two days since she had seen her.

“So when did you two meet?” some fake blonde in a bright blue dress asked, her giant smile aimed directly at Shaw.

“What?” Shaw asked, still distracted by the thought of Root.

“When did you and your husband meet?” the woman repeated gesturing towards where Harold was talking to some other billionaire men.

“Oh, uhh, a year ago…ish” Shaw said with a shrug and felt the woman stare at her in slight confusion.

“Well, good for you” she said her tone far too chirpy for Shaw’s enjoyment. “He certainly looks like he’s into….well”

Shaw stared at her blankly. “Yeah, excuse me.” she said before immediately walking away from the woman, tapping her ear piece and aggressively whispering.

“This is like trophy wife town Finch, I am not impressed.”

“I’m sorry Sameen, maybe it would be a good time for you to slip away, find our killer” Harold suggested but Shaw was already bursting through the kitchen in pursuit of a guy in a black hoodie who had taken one look at her and taken off running.

Shaw was thankful for some action finally, but what she hadn’t realised was that by catching him so easily and taking him out, she would then have to return to the gala. Rinsing his blood off her hands in the nearest ladies bathroom she stared at her reflection, taking several seconds to even recognise herself. Rolling her eyes at herself she stormed back out into the gala and took a seat next to Harold where their covers names were displayed on the table.

“Can we leave?” she asked in a half whisper.

“Unfortunately not yet, Sameen” Harold replied and Shaw sighed leaning back in her chair and catching sight of waiters beginning to bring out silver trays of food.

Well, there was always a silver lining.

*

The next day wasn’t any better, Shaw had barely slept after the gala had come to a slow and painful end, and there was still no Root.

Shaw felt like she was now painfully used to the almost constant overthinking about Root’s whereabouts but was still trying to desperately block every stray thought on the matter. Which in no way made it any easier, she was starting to get angry that Root would be so careless, and to not even bother telling her where she was, or checking in. Shaw didn’t appreciate it. There was a long list of reasons why Root might have gone dark, it could be for the rest of the teams protection, but it still bothered her. It still made her want to punch a hole in the wall. Because how else was she meant to react?

“What the fuck?” she practically shouted.

“Sameen” Harold knew there wasn’t a lot of use in trying to calm her.

“Again, Harold, NO” she refused.

“I have no doubt that you will have this under control within the day, Sameen” Harold said and she shook her head.

“I am not stepping foot into a department store, not as a customer and definitely _not_ as an employee” Shaw said.

“Detective Fusco is waiting out the front to take you” Harold said and swiftly moved back towards his computer as if to take cover from the fireball that Shaw was turning into.

“If you think you’re going to get off on this lightly, Harold, think again” Shaw warned. “And _where is Root_?”

“I am trying to find out, Sameen” Harold said, “Please just make sure Roberta Clint is unharmed”

“Have you considered this, Harold” Shaw started “What if her number came up because I’m going to murder her today with a nail file while I’m working at a …department store” she almost shuddered at the words and Harold lifted both his eyebrows.

“Highly doubtful, Sameen, but very valid point” Harold said before looking back at the computer and Shaw groaned loudly.

*

Time passed slowly, as if purposefully trying to piss her off while she stood at the perfume counter spraying customers frivolously whether they asked for it or not. Roberta’s biggest problem was hardly someone trying to kill her but rather an ex boyfriend, who was a little too interested still. Shaw had almost rolled her eyes as she had tackled him to the ground. She knew these covers were designed to keep her out of Decima’s way, but my god did she miss dealing with real bad guys with big guns. All she could do while she stood their spritzing people until the bottle ran out was think about Root, and all that did was piss her off to high heavens.

When she finally got home, she was ready to shoot the first person who opened their mouth to say anything to her. She had been in a dress all day, heels again, and she was tired…exhausted even, as usual. Her lack of sleep from the previous night and not helped her mood in the slightest but she figured all the sleep in the world would not have been enough to get the smallest of fake smiles onto her face to spray perfume at people all day.

When she swung open her door she expected to be greeted by a overly zealous Bear, which she had summoned just enough energy to deal with as she had dragged herself down the hallway to her apartment.

But Bear did not come running, instead she was faced with something she had not been prepared for.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> :O
> 
> (so a lot of you have voiced how much you want me to never stop writing this, and I have to say, I'm so flattered and I wish I could write it forever, but I was struggling to see how I could continue it....alas I went for a run and suddenly figured it out... so you're welcome, we now have quite a few more chapters on this journey)


	12. How To Be Married

Root was sitting in the middle of the floor eating a cupcake and deeply engrossed in a bridal magazine, with Bear soundly asleep beside her.

Shaw froze, her hand still gripping the door handle. Root looked up at the sound of someone coming in, her mouth suddenly dropping open at the sight of Shaw still dressed in her department store uniform, black dress, heels, lipstick, her dark hair falling in messy waves over her shoulders.

They stared at each other with no words for several moments, before Shaw finally regained whatever composure she had left and came inside, slamming the door shut behind her causing Bear to look up sleepily at her.

Shaw didn’t know what to say, it’s like everything had suddenly done a mass exit from her brain the moment that she had laid eyes on Root. She looked at Root’s fingers, which were between the pages of the magazine marking her place, her other hand holding the half eaten cupcake, her long fingers holding the base of it so gently. Shaw’s eyes slowly made their way up to Root’s face, she looked tired. Their eyes locked. Root could see that not too far under Shaw’s exhaustion was a whole lot of anger.

“What, no kiss?” Root said finally breaking the silence, her attempt to sound annoyingly flirty almost drowned out by how tired she was. Shaw’s jaw clenched, she still couldn’t figure out what the right thing to say was, so instead she decided to go with something she knew how to fix. Reaching behind herself she tugged down the zipper of the stupid dress she had been sucked into all day, pulling it off her shoulders and letting it fall to the ground around her ankles. She stepped out of it, feeling Root’s eyes grazing across every inch of her body. Then she unstrapped the heels, leaving them discarded beside the dress as she pulled her hair into a lose ponytail.

“Were you…worried?” Root said finally, her voice was quiet and soft, she knew the answer already but she wanted to hear Shaw say it.

“What do you think?” Shaw growled, hearing her voice for the first time in days almost sent a shiver across Root’s body.

“I think you should say it” Root said “I know you’re mad.”

“Is that why you did it Root?” Shaw asked the frustration and anger starting to bubble up insider her “You wanted to come back and have me admit some kind of emotion, because I thought we talked about this.”

“No, I-” Root began but Shaw wasn’t finished.

“You _can’t_ just do that” Shaw said her voice getting louder. “You can’t just disappear anymore and not tell me, you can’t think you can win every fucking fight on your own, or that it’s better and safer for the rest of us if you handle shit by yourself, you _can’t_ do that” Root stared at her in amazement at the sudden outburst. “And not only that, but you can’t fucking come back in here after being gone for days and have the nerve to ask me if I was goddamn worried about you, because of course I fucking was. _You_ wanted to stay married Root, so fucking act like we are.”

Root opened her mouth to speak but no words came out, Shaw rolled her eyes and stepped over Root’s legs to go to the kitchen, but Root quickly grabbed her hand.

“I’m sorry” she said softly and Shaw stared directly ahead feeling Root’s thumb stroke the top of her hand.

“You could have just told me” Shaw said trying to pull her hand away but Root wouldn’t let her.

“I wanted to, Sam” Root said “But I just couldn’t bare the thought of you getting hurt for me.”

“That’s pathetic” Shaw said still refusing to look at her.

“It’s not” Root argued “Not any more than you being worried about where I was.”

Shaw finally turned around to see Root’s dark puppy like gaze looking up at her.

“I’ll tell you next time, okay?” Root said and Shaw knew she meant it.

“No matter what?”

Root nodded, and Shaw rolled her eyes up to stare at the ceiling, letting out a sigh and letting any excess frustration she had been feeling towards Root go, mostly because she was too tired to keep this up.

“Why are you reading that shit?” Shaw asked looking back at Root and glancing at the magazine beside her.

“I was thinking,” Root said her fingers playing with Shaw’s “That we should redo our vows.”

“I like our vows” Shaw said.

“You wouldn’t even remember them if you hadn’t seen the video” Root pointed out and Shaw shrugged. “Come here” Root said tugging at Shaw’s arm, “at least let me try and persuade you.”

Shaw didn’t argue, she let Root pull her onto the floor, she let Root adjust them so that she was perfectly between Root’s legs, she let Root pull her back until her body was relaxed back against Root’s, her let Root kiss the side of her head, she let Root kiss her shoulder, she let Root’s lips linger on her skin, she let Root put the bridal magazine on her lap, she let Root take a bite of the cupcake and get frosting in the back of her hair. She didn’t protest, she didn’t say a word, she didn’t even try and stop the thought of how well they physically fit together. Shaw’s fingers ran through Bear’s fur, and for the first time ever she wondered what her parents would think of this. Of Root.

*

When Shaw woke the next morning she felt exceptionally heavy, after rubbing her eyes she lifted her head and Saw that Root was asleep on her, between her legs, using her stomach as a pillow. One arm up near Shaw’s chest, the other tucked neatly beside her body her warm hand resting on Shaw’s thigh.

Shaw lifted one of Root’s long fingers and let it fall back down onto her chest. Her hand wandered down to Root’s head and she picked up a strand of Root’s hair, winding it around her finger then unwinding it, then rewinding it again.

Then Root began to stir, lifting her head and resting her chin on Shaw’s stomach and sleepily opening her eyes.

“Are you playing with my hair, Sameen?” she asked her voice was thick with sleep.

“No” Shaw said quickly moving her hand away “I was just…thinking about how to occupy myself while your bony ass had me trapped here”

Root just smiled. “Okay.” She put her head back down on Shaw’s stomach and Shaw rolled her eyes.

“No” Shaw said wiggled underneath her “Don’t go back to sleep.”

She felt Root smile against her stomach.

“Why not?”

“I’m already bored” Shaw said “At least let me up”

“But you’re comfortable” Root said.

“Yeah, well you’re heavy” Shaw replied.

“What if I want you pinned to the bed?” Root asked and glanced back up at Shaw.

“Then move your head lower down and I’ll be here as long as you want” Shaw said and Root just quirked an eyebrow.

“That’s a very tempting offer,” Root said placing a kiss above Shaw’s underwear line before resting her head back down again.

“Seriously?” Sam watched her “You’re _that_ tired still?”

“I didn’t sleep for three days, Sameen” Root mumbled.

“Yeah” Shaw said with a sigh, placing her hand on Root’s head “You said.”

“Can’t we just stay here?” Root mumbled again tiredly.

“For how long?” Shaw asked.

“Indefinitely” Root said, her fingertips tracing circles on the side of Shaw’s thighs.

“How about you stay here indefinitely, and I go tell Harold you’re alive” Shaw proposed.

“I can just get Her to tell him” Root’s words were barely coherent, as her eyes sleepily began to shut again.

“No, I should” Shaw said moving her hand onto Root’s arm that was still draped across her midriff, she followed it all the way to Root’s hand and then stopped.

“Why?” Root asked “Do you need to apologise for something you did when I was gone?”

Shaw was fairly struck by how well Root could figure her out by simply her tone.

“He’s probably the one that needs to do the apologising for trapping me in that dress” Shaw muttered, and felt Root slowly starting to fall asleep on her again. “Okay, I’m getting up.”

Root groaned softly, “I want you close” she mumbled.

“I’ll be right back” Shaw told her and finally a few moments later Root drew herself up into a sitting position. Shaw quickly pulled herself up off the bed and took a look at Root, dishevelled dark hair pressed against the side of her face that had been asleep on Shaw, her eyes sleepy, dark and hazy, her loose t-shirt falling off one shoulder dangerously baring her porcelain skin to Shaw’s eyes where she could see a couple of bruises she had made that were yet to heal. Root’s lips parted as she exhaled softly. Shaw knew Root wasn’t doing it on purpose but something about the way she was sitting on the bed, so dazed and sleepy made it almost impossible for Shaw to leave. She quickly distracted herself by getting dressed.

“Where’s the blanket?” Root mumbled from behind her, and Shaw turned around as she pulled her jacket on to see Root practically asleep and still sitting up.

“Okay, come on” Shaw said grabbing a pillow and moving closer to Root, taking her shoulders and easing her down onto the pillow before pulling a blanket over her body. “Get some rest.” she said but knew Root was almost asleep already. “I’ll bring you a triple shot on my way back” Shaw said as she started to close the bedroom door but paused when she heard Root’s voice.

“Thank you Sam” Root’s voice was muffled and faded, barely conscious, “I love you, Sam.”

Shaw stopped and stared at the nest in the middle of the bed where Root was curled up. Those three stupid little words clinging to her brain immediately as she slowly pulled the door shut without a sound.

“Make sure she’s okay” Shaw automatically said to the dog as she left, feeling distracted and somewhat annoyed, but not angry enough to do anything about it. How could she be angry at all after that?

As she went to enter Harold’s she almost collided with Fusco who was just coming out of the building.

“He ain’t there” Fusco said and Shaw frowned taking a step back.

“Where is he?” she asked and Fusco shrugged.

“Beats me.”

“Is Reese…”

“Nope” Fusco interjected before she could get the rest of the sentence out. Shaw stared up at the building and wondered where they might be, then wondered if maybe they were handling numbers without her today, giving her a break from the hell of the past two days. Sounded like something Harold might do.

“What’d you need him for?” Fusco asked.

“You know,” Shaw gestured absentmindedly “Root’s…uh…”

“Mhm, yeah, sure” Fusco said looking at her in confusion, then suddenly he stopped. “Hey, what’s that?”

“What’s what?” Shaw asked looking at him.

“What’s that on your finger?” Fusco asked and pointed at Shaw’s left hand. Shaw automatically glanced at her ring which she had stupidly put back on last night at Root’s request after looking through that dumb bridal magazine.

“Oh this” she said staring at the ring. “Just from a thing…Harold…um, made me wear it.”

Fusco looked even more confused than before, “Aren’t ya gonna take it off then?”

Shaw immediately went to pull it off holding it up before quickly tucking it in her pocket.

“Right” she said “Kinda zoney at the moment, I’m gonna go…sleep.”

Fusco just nodded and watched at her curiously as she began to walk off.

 _Zoney_? She thought as she walked off stuffing her hands into her pockets, _that’s not even a goddamn word Sameen_ she thought mentally kicking herself.

Once she got back in the door she immediately pulled the ring from her pocket dropping it on the kitchen counter and staring at it like it would do something. She leaned her arms against the counter and didn’t move her eyes off the ring.

“Not considering divorce again are you?” Root’s voice came from the other side of the room, Shaw looked over her shoulder and saw Root leaning against the doorframe of the bedroom.

“No” Shaw said and looked back at the ring that was innocently sitting in front of her. “Lionel just saw me wearing it, and I don’t know, I freaked out for some reason, it was dumb.”

“You didn’t tell him?” Root asked coming over to Shaw.

“No” Shaw said sullenly.

“Well did you see Harry?” Root asked.

“No.”

“Did you bring me coffee?”

“No…I” Shaw frowned, and Root just wrapped her arms around Shaw from the back. Shaw stood there, still staring at the ring, suddenly remembering what Root had mumbled to her before she had left, wondering if she had remembered she had said it or not.

“I’m guessing you’re feeling better now” Shaw said and she felt Root’s teeth against her ear.

“Much” Root said softly.

Shaw wondered whether she should bring it up or not, but promptly opted for not.

“So, Sam, I was thinking” Root said turning Shaw around in her arms. “You still owe me something.

Shaw lifted an eyebrow looking vaguely unimpressed at the notion.

“The cupboards are looking kinda empty” Root said with a cute pout “So is the fridge.”

Shaw suddenly realised what Root was talking about and couldn’t stop herself from rolling her eyes.

“Seriously, today?” Shaw asked.

“There’s no time like the present, Sameen” Root smiled. “Besides, that was the deal.”

“Why do I feel like this is going to be the worst kind of torture?” Shaw groaned.

“Don’t be so negative, Sam” Root said nudging her gently with her elbow. “This could be fun.”

“Can I bring my gun?” Shaw asked and Root just smirked.

“No way in hell.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh my god....Root said it! Is Shaw actually going to tell her at any point?   
> These two. I can't. Especially when they're being so domestic with each other <3  
> Let me know what you think! x


	13. Wanna Move In?

 

Shaw was in Hell. Which she never considered a bad place to be, until she realised it was lit with fluorescent white lights, with loud announcement speakers, tall shelves, and screaming children at the end of every aisle.

“Do I get chocolate for being well behaved?” Shaw asked vacantly staring at a mother who was midst bribing her child to stop crying.

“You’re not being well behaved” Root said without looking up from the back of a packet that she was examining.

“What have I done?” Shaw asked questioningly.

“Well for starters you keep riding around on the cart” Root said.

“What else am I meant to do with it?” Shaw said abandoning it in the middle of the aisle and walking over to Root, grabbing the packet of fried rice from her hand and launching it into the grocery cart.

“You’re impossible” Root said staring at her, Shaw could see the almost smile forming on her lips and just smirked.

“And you’re annoying, lets go” Shaw said retrieving the cart and giving it a decent enough push so that it would still pull her along even if her feet were still on the ground. Root came to a stop and Shaw let go of the cart, letting it roll towards Root and then eventually hit her in the ass. Root turned around and lifted an eyebrow at Shaw.

“Peanut butter” Shaw said and pointed at the jars of peanut butter behind Root, who grabbed one without looking away from Shaw and dropping it in the cart.

“Bear would be more helpful than you” Root said and Shaw shook her head.

“That’s just cruel” Shaw said and Root looked at her. “You’d put Bear through _this_?”

Root just rolled her eyes. “Even professional killers need toilet paper, Sam”

“I can get toilet paper” Shaw said “I just don’t see why we have to do carrots and broccoli at the same time.”

Root laughed, “because if you only get one thing you don’t need a cart.”

“Wow” Shaw said sarcastically “Selling point.”

Suddenly Root stopped and turned around to look at Shaw before walking over to her and kissing her lightly on the lips. Shaw tasted the cherry on her lips, but before she could move Root had pulled away, Shaw looking at her with a slight confusion.

“I like seeing you in a grocery store” Root said “Even if you hate it”

“Glad I could fulfil one of your weird fantasies” Shaw said and Root smiled.

“You look so unthreatening in here riding around on a grocery cart.”

“Are you saying I look threatening normally?”

“Not to me” Root smirked “Well, maybe a little, but I like it.”

Shaw lifted an eyebrow. “Do normal people flirt in grocery stores?”

“We’re married” Root pointed out.

“Do married people flirt in grocery stores?” Shaw rephrased and Root smirked.

“Normal married people don’t, but we do.”

“You do” Shaw corrected her.

“Sam, I was thinking” Root said wandering down the aisle towards the freezers with ice cream, and Shaw put her feet up on the lower bars of the cart, moving at a crawling pace beside Root.

“Oh god, not again” Shaw groaned sarcastically.

“I’m serious” Root said spinning around and grabbing the end of the cart, bringing it to a holt.

“Okay” Shaw said still standing on the cart. Root was looking at her as if maybe she was nervous about what was about to come next, Shaw didn’t often see that look on Root’s face, she frowned. “What?”

“I think we should move in together” Root said looking at Shaw before turning around and starting to walk off pulling the cart along with Shaw behind her.

“Um” Shaw struggled to find the right words, jumping off the cart in front of the ice cream. “Don’t we kind of already?”

“Yeah but Sam, we sort of just bounce between each others places randomly” Root said as they both reached for cookie dough ice cream at the same time. Root looked at her.

“We could still keep both places” she said “We could just make one of them…our home.”

Shaw thought about it as she put the ice cream in the cart and hopped back up into her cart riding position. Root took the front of the cart and started pulling her towards the check out. Root smiled in acknowledgement to the cashier before starting to pile the food up in front of her.

“I know I said nothing had to change” Root continued “but considering we are married…I mean we were barely away from each other for two nights and look how that turned out”

“That was different, Root” Shaw said “I didn’t know where you were.”

Shaw glanced at the cashier who was desperately trying not to listen in on their conversation, but the expression on her face was clearly saying something else.

“Well what about the time you left after I stitched you up, that was weird, you have to admit” Root said, and the cashier’s eyes widened a little. “We’ve pretty much spent every night together since we started sleeping together, Sam”

“Yeah, but if we moved in together then…” Shaw started but Root interrupted.

“Then what? I’d get sick of you faster? Because sweetie, if I was going to get fed up with you then it would have happened already”

Shaw stared at her trying to process the situation faster.

“I’m not saying you have to decide right away, I’m just saying…maybe think about it” Root said with a shrug “I like waking up to you, and I like breakfast and sex with you”

Shaw stared at Root, glancing momentarily at the cashier who’s eyes were aggressively fixated on her till as she tried not to listen. Root swiped her card and picked up the groceries.

“If we can be married, then we can probably handle living together” Root said and started to walk off. Shaw stared after her before looking at the cashier’s name tag.

“Hey Greta” She said slamming her hand on the till making the girl jump “just pretend you didn’t hear any of that, okay?”

Greta looked at her and nodded and Shaw turned to walk off.

“I’d move in with her if I were you” Greta said from behind her and Shaw turned around again and Greta just shrugged “She’s hot, leggy and mouthy, and you’ve already married her.”

“You checked out my _wife_?” Shaw asked still not used to that goddamn word, Greta just nodded.

“Well yeah”

“Okay, stop” Shaw said.

“I don’t know why you’d hesitate, I mean the way she looks at you is…well kinda intense but it’s she obviously loves you” Greta said and Shaw just stared at her.

“Do you observe all your customers this closely?” Shaw asked.

“What else am I meant to do in this hell hole?” Greta smirked and Shaw just shook her head and walked off to catch up with Root, who was waiting by the door.

“What was that about?” Root asked lifting an eyebrow.

“I was just making sure she wasn’t going to bill us for her therapy session” Shaw said taking a couple of bags off Root.

“She didn’t have to listen” Root said as they began to walk.

“You didn’t have to have that talk in a grocery store” Shaw replied.

“You don’t want to” Root sighed.

“I didn’t say that”

“You didn’t have to.”

“Root” Shaw stopped walking and waited for Root to eventually turn around, several paces ahead of her. “Have you even thought about the negatives of this?”

“Yeah Sam, I did, and all the reasons why it’s a good idea won out” Root said “And if anything happened and we needed to cool off you can always go back to yours”

“So we’d live at yours?” Shaw lifted an eyebrow.

“Well that’s obvious, you barely own a bed” Root smirked “Unless you wanna get somewhere new”

Shaw looked at Root and sighed “Even if I don’t answer you now I’m going to end up saying yes aren’t I?”

“Probably” Root grinned moving closer to Shaw “I’m very persuasive.”

“Yeah you probably persuaded me to marry you too” Shaw said and kept walking leaving Root behind her.

“So is that a yes?” Root called out after her.

“No” Shaw replied.

“Should I ask you again when we’re having sex?” Root said taking a couple of long strides to catch up with Shaw.

“No” Shaw said.

“You’re impossible” Root huffed.

“And you’re annoying” Shaw smirked.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What's Shaw gonna say????
> 
> You barely had to wait 12 hours for this one!!  
> Although I have to admit this chapter is only coming early because I'm going away for the weekend, so you're going to have to wait a couple of days for the next one! And I feel bad because it's the first time they won't be daily! Gasp. How will we survive.  
> However, you will get something on Sunday I promise!
> 
> Thank you again for your support! It honestly means the world x


	14. Christmas Is Coming

It was cold out, the sky was grey, orange leaves stuck to the streets like glue. Shaw enjoyed running in Central Park, she enjoyed it even more now that she got to take Bear with her. He was a good motivator, often having a vast amount more energy than she did herself he would take off running at an unmatchable pace for Shaw, giving her legs the ultimate work out as she pushed herself to keep him in sight. Today was no different, Bear was merely a spot in the distance, stopping only a couple of times to sniff the grass or glance back to make sure that Shaw was still in sight too. The cold brushed against her cheeks as she ran, her breathing steady and even, her legs were finally starting to feel fatigued, she didn’t know how long she had been out here for, but it was addictive, especially in the cold when her body felt so warm.

Shaw couldn’t help but think about the earlier conversation she had with Root that day, about them moving in together. She knew it made sense, they were married, they were going to try and act married. And as much as they thought it would be easy to keep things the way they had been before Vegas, it just didn’t seem so simple anymore.

She knew what it was that was bothering her about saying yes, she had never lived with someone before, not in this kind of sense anyway. But maybe she would just have to suck it up, it was just Root after all. And Root knew her, she knew what she was signing up for. And fuck, she’d practically spent half her nights at Root’s anyway.

It was starting to get dark, the only ones left were people exercising. As her muscles started to ache she slowed down to a gentle jog, wiping the sweat off her forehead with the back of her hand.

“Bear” she called out and she watched him pause, and turn around to look at her in the distance.

“Hier,” she called to him in Dutch, clicking her fingers and pointing at her heel. But Bear just stared at her, then looked in the other direction, before he kept going. Shaw frowned and watched as he completely obeyed her orders.

“What the fuck” she muttered under her breath, before blowing out a mouthful of air and pushed herself to run faster, approaching a sprint as she chased after her dog.

“Bear” she shouted after him as he continued to keep running at full speed through the park, her muscles screaming as she pushed herself as fast as she could.

“Stout hond” she chastised him knowing she was now close enough for him to hear, but again he took no notice of her. At least he was slowing down Shaw thought her heart racing fast in her chest. Finally he slowed down to a stop still several yards ahead of her, sitting at someones feet wagging his tail happily. Shaw squinted to see who it was in the dim evening light, and as she jogged closer realised it could only be one person. Root. Coming to a stop in front of Root she put her knees on her sides and doubled in half, taking long deep gasps for air.

“What in the hell” she managed in between ragged breaths. “What are you doing out here?”

“I came to see you” Root smiled, she was rugged up in a coat with the collar popped up to keep her neck warm, her nose and cheeks rosy pink from the cold.

“Of course you did” Shaw said her breathing slowly coming back to normal, as she hooked Bear onto the leash and thrust it into Root’s hands.

“You almost killed me.”

“Don’t be so dramatic, Sameen” Root said patting Bear’s head.

“I was talking to the dog” Shaw said and nudged Bear with her foot.

“It’s not my fault Bear likes me more” Root said and Shaw glared at her.

“Bear does not like you more.”

Root quirked an eyebrow and watched as Shaw stretched.

“So I thought about your thing” Shaw said, very aware that Root was happily watching her every move.

“My thing?” Root asked.

“Yeah, your we should move into together because we’re married thing” Shaw said rolling her shoulders a couple of times, and stretching her neck on both sides.

“And?” Root said a ounce of excitement creeping into her voice.

“And you’re probably right” Shaw said with a shrug.

Root’s eyes widened “So that’s a yes?”

“I mean you would have probably just trapped me at your place one way or another so, yeah” Shaw said and looked at Root who’s whole face had lit up with an excited smile. Root stepped around Bear and looked at Shaw before leaning in and kissing the end of her cold nose. Shaw just rolled her eyes reaching up and putting her freezing cold hand on Root’s cheek and pulling her in, their lips grazing against each other before Shaw actually kissed her properly.

“Your hand is freezing” Root whispered against Shaw’s lips.

“So I’ll put it down your pants and warm it up” Shaw smirked and swore Root’s cheeks flushed a deeper shade of pink.

“Wanna go home?” Root asked and Shaw smirked.

“Yeah, home sounds good.”

*

“Do you know what day it is?” Root asked as she handed Shaw a coffee the next morning.

“Thursday?” Shaw replied taking a sip from the black steaming coffee.

“First of December” Root said and wiggled her eyebrows “Christmas is coming.”

“Someones told you Santa isn’t real right?” Shaw said looking at Root who pulled a face.

“Oh come on Sam, everyone likes christmas” Root said “Even sociopaths with axis II personality disorders”

“Is that a proven fact?” Shaw asked and Root put down her mug, wrapping her arms around Shaw and pulling her in until their hips bumped together.

“We can get a tree” Root said “And put antlers on Bear, and drink whiskey by the fire, and have sex by fairy light”

“No candles?” Shaw lifted an eyebrow and Root smirked leaning in closer.

“There’s always candles” Root said her lips against Shaw’s ear “Hot melted wax, fire, something that smells so good, what more could a girl want” Roots lips kissed down Shaw’s neck, biting, and sucking gently at her pulse point.

Shaw put her coffee down on the counter and pushed Root back against it.

“Are you going to be like this all month?” she asked and Root pulled back with her lust filled soft dark eyes, and pink parted lips twisting into a smile.

“Maybe” she said softly. “I _love_ Christmas”

“Do you?” Shaw asked running her hands over Root’s ass before bringing them around to the front, undoing the button of Root’s jeans with a quick flick of her fingers and pulling the zipper down.

“Yeah” Root replied breathlessly as Shaw slid her hand into Root’s underwear.

“You know it gets pretty cold in December” Shaw said pressing a single finger inside Root making her cheeks flush pink. Root moved her legs further apart, tugging her jeans down over her ass and Shaw smirked feeling her wetness.

“It can be kinda hard to keep warm” Shaw said catching Root’s lips with her own and biting on her bottom lip. “Unless you keep moving” she said, adding another finger and thrusting them steadily. A breathless gasp escaping Root’s lips and Shaw watched her face, the long curled lashed of her closed eyes, the pinkness that was spreading across her cheeks, the way her lips were parted and her tongue was sitting between her teeth. She looked at Root’s hands that were gripping the edge of the counter, she pressed into Root further drawing out a moan before pulling her hand out of Root’s pants altogether. Root’s eyes fluttered open, her pupils dilated from arousal.

“What are you doing?” Root asked sliding her hands up Shaw’s sides.

“My coffee’s gonna go cold” Shaw shrugged concealing the smirk that was trying to appear on her face.

“I’ll make you another one” Root said grabbing Shaw as she tried to move.

“I’ll just have this one” Shaw said reaching for her mug, but Root was fast and moved it out of her reach. Shaw lifted an eyebrow at Root who just stared at her, biting on her bottom lip.

“You can’t just finger me and then stop” Root said “When have I ever done that to you?”

“Do you want me to make a list?” Shaw smirked and Root tucked a strand of her hair behind her ear.

“Sameen” she said with a pout, as Shaw dragged her fingers up Root’s hips and waist, sliding them under her shirt and digging her fingertips into Root’s back.

“I was getting into the christmas spirit” Shaw said with a smirk biting lightly on Root’s shoulder “And then I remembered, I don’t care about Christmas.”

“But you care about me” Root said letting her head fall back as Shaw kept biting her.

“So you keep saying” Shaw said before taking her hands off Root again and pulling back.

“Sam” Root groaned in protest.

“Get up” Shaw said and pointed at the counter, Root lifted an eyebrow but pulled herself up onto the counter without a word. Shaw pulled Root’s jeans off and dropped them on the ground, staring at Root’s crotch before meeting her eyes.

“Is this payback or something?” Root asked and Shaw smirked.

“Oh baby, this isn’t even close to what payback would look like, for all the times you leave me hanging” Shaw said and Root licked her lip.

“You enjoy it” she said “And I always see it through, eventually”

“Eventually” Shaw echoed putting her hands on Root’s thighs and pushing them apart. “Lay back.”

Root did as she was told, and Shaw smirked to herself knowing she had the upper hand for once.

“It’s fun being in charge” Shaw said and Root rolled her eyes, Shaw pulled Root to the edge of the counter and yanked her underwear off, lowering herself so she was between Root’s thighs and kissing along each one. She looked up at Root watching her chest start to rise and fall at a quickened pace. Shaw kissed Root’s centre, running her tongue through the folds slowly and softly. She heard Root exhale, her eyes lifting so she could watch Root, watch her hands, her fingers dance across her own stomach, slipping under her shirt and running up to her chest. Shaw gently traced Root’s clit with her tongue, watching as Root’s hips lifted, and a soft moan escaped her lips. She slipped a finger in, then another, pumping them steadily while her tongue pressed harder on Root’s clit. Shaw shut her eyes for the briefest moment letting Root’s moans be the only thing she was aware of. She opened her eyes again, looking at Root, her back arched on the counter, she could see every breath enter and exit her lungs, one hand gripped in a tangle of her own hair, the other on her breast.

“Do you want me to stop?” Shaw asked with a smirk and Root’s eyes flashed open as she looked down at Shaw.

“Don’t you dare” she said breathlessly.

Shaw bit Root’s inner thigh whilst slipping another finger inside her making her gasp in pleasure, as she quickened her pace, curling the tips of her fingers inside Root, her moans growing louder and louder, before finally her back arched, Root’s hands searching for anything to grip onto as Shaw sent her over the edge, her orgasm rippling through her body, before she fell back down limply, her breathing heavy.

But Shaw wasn’t finished, she pinned Root’s thighs down and lowered her head again, sucking on her clit. Root propped herself up on her elbows lifting her head to look at her.

“S-Sam” she tried to say but let her head fall back as a groan fell from her lips.

Shaw ran circles around Root’s clit with her tongue before sucking on it again, lightly, then harder, with more pressure. She felt Root try and squirm underneath her, desperately trying to move her legs closer together, to press against Shaw’s head. But she couldn’t move them, Shaw was pinning her down with too much strength, forcing her legs to stay apart. Root couldn’t stay still underneath her, she could barely handle the feeling of overwhelming pleasure, as she fell back down onto the counter, her arms reaching above her head to grip the other edge, her knuckles going white.

“Oh my god” she groaned bucking her hips as she rode out a second orgasm, feeling the blood rushing through her body, as finally she fell still, Shaw letting go of her legs.

Shaw stood up and walked round to the other side of the counter, fully admiring the half naked woman who was laying on top of it, staring at the ceiling, breathing heavily.

She looked down at Root’s face and smirked.

“I can’t feel my legs” Root said looking up at Shaw, her cheeks still flushed, her eyes still dilated.

“Good” Shaw said leaning down and lightly biting the end of her nose. “You can stay there forever, you look better than a fruit bowl”

”A fruit bowl” Root repeated, still feeling flustered, her heart still racing in her chest.

Shaw picked up her mug of coffee and took a sip.

“Still warm” she said and winked at Root who just stared at her in a complete daze.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Miss me? ;)  
> I hope you're ready for more, because more is definitely coming....  
> Sometimes when I write these Shoot moments I'm like, damn this needs some fan art hehe   
> Feel free to share your thoughts/feelings xxx


	15. That's My Wife

“This is so exciting” Root said with a grin as they broke into a high security warehouse facility, sticking against the walls as they actively dodged any cameras.

“It’s not” Shaw said “And you’re distracted.”

“I am not” Root said, and Shaw could feel Root’s body so close behind her they were almost touching. Shaw had her gun by her side, trying to ignore Root as she concentrated on trying to listening for footsteps before they crossed the hallway.

“She says we’re clear to go” Root whispered in Shaw’s ear and Shaw rolled her eyes.

“This is such a terrible idea” Shaw said glancing down the hallway and seeing it was clear before taking a couple of quick steps to the wall on the other side, Root followed, and again she was so close behind Shaw their bodies bumped together.

Shaw glared over her shoulder at Root who simply lifted an eyebrow.

“Close?” Shaw said.

“Married.” Root answered.

“Annoyed” Shaw said.

“Stimulated” Root smirked.

Shaw glared at her again, before throwing her arm over Root’s shoulder, using it to steady her aim as she fired a bullet at a guard who had appeared and was suddenly reaching for his walkie.

“Distracted” Shaw said again and turned away from Root.

“Everyone gets distracted sometimes, Sam” Root said as they approached double doors, she punched in a password that The Machine gave her and the little red light switched to green as they passed through.

“Well can you not when we’re trespassing” Shaw asked her gun was up, ready, she was focused, looking around.

“Why?” Root asked and Shaw stared at her blankly.

“It would be an inconvenience” she replied.

“If I got shot?” Root asked walking off further down the hallway and pulling a key card from her pocket, swiping it to get into one of the offices.

Shaw felt her jaw clench unwillingly at those words. Then she heard Root’s gun fire. She spun around and saw another guard falling at Root’s feet, she glanced at Shaw before stepping over him into the office.

“I don’t think you have to worry about me getting shot” Root said as she sat down at the desk and opened the laptop. Shaw pulled the collapsed guard back into the office and stood by the door just in case. “At least while you’re here, anyway”

“What does that mean?” Shaw asked.

“You wouldn’t let anyone shoot me” Root said with a smirk and Shaw could hear her typing furiously.

“Well, that depends” Shaw answered and Root was about to reply when suddenly The Machine warned her.

“Incoming” she said to Shaw who stuck her head out into the hallway, immediately seeing at least six guards coming her way.

“Oh now it’s a party” Shaw smirked and took two of them out immediately, one bullet each. Then she was being shot at, a bullet hit the wall in front of her and bounced back off, another two shot past her face. Then it was her turn, she stuck her arm around the corner and shot twice, memorising where the guards at been in formation as they approached her, she heard a grunt and another one was down. Three left. They were getting closer, she had to move faster. Four gunshots from the guards, none of them even came near her. She shot a couple more, but they didn’t fall. Now they were playing.

She shot her last two bullets, getting one of the guys in both his kneecaps and he dropped to the ground with a loud groan of pain. She was out. Dropping her gun on the floor she stepped out into the hallway completely unarmed without a second thought, not seeing Root’s eyes widen from the other side of the room or her mouth fall open to protest.

Shaw greeted one of the last two guards with a punch in the face, catching him right across the bridge of his nose sending him stumbling back, just in time for her to grab the other guard by the jacket and pull him forward, bring her knee up to his gut in one hard and sharp movement, waiting for him to buckle before catching his arm and twisting it behind his back. Keeping him firmly double over she kneed him again, once, twice, three times until he finally began to fall to his knees. Letting go of his arm he dropped onto fall fours, and she kicked him in the teeth.

Unfortunately the other guard was coming at her again and swung an over thrown punch at her, dodging it he slammed his fist into the wall and she shoved him against it reaching for his gun but he threw her off, she stumbled back against the other wall and growled with annoyance, lurching at him again. She jabbed him with her elbow before swinging a punch and catching him in the jaw, his face bloodied from the first punch she had sent him. Suddenly he pulled a knife, swinging it at her, she quickly ducked before trying to grab his arm but before she could he slashed the knife at her, catching her across the forearm.

She froze for less than a millisecond a frown appearing on her face as she saw blood appearing on her arm, before a rush of anger filled her veins and she threw him back against the wall whacking the knife from his hand letting it clatter to the ground. She didn’t realise Root had just appeared in the doorway. Root saw the blood on Shaw’s arm and immediately pulled her gun, stepping over the trail of bodies that Shaw had left and pointing it at the guards head. Root watched them wrestling with each other for a few moments before seeing his knife laying on the ground, she picked it up with a smirk.

“Hey buddy” Root said to him and both him and Shaw frowned at the interruption of Root’s voice. “We’ve got a problem” Root said and the guard kept fighting Shaw, trying his best not to let Root’s voice distract him.

“See you’re probably a decent guy” Root said “But that little firecracker who’s just taken out all your friends and is probably about to knock you unconscious just happens to be my wife, and I _really_ don’t take well to people who slash at my beautiful girl with a knife.”

Shaw almost spun around to take Root out instead, but in that split second of weakness the guard threw her back against the wall and she felt a sharp jolt in her back, but before she could pull herself back up to go at him again, Root stepped in front of her placing her gun right between the guards eyes, pinning him against the opposite wall.

“Do you see why we have a problem?” Root asked and the guard nodded desperately. “So what are we gonna do?”

“I’m sorry,” the guard begged, sweat and blood caking his face, his eyes wild with panic.

“You’re sorry?” Root repeated “Yeah, that’s not good enough.”

In one swift movement she caught his arm, pinning it up against the wall and stabbing his knife through the palm of his hand, trapping him against the wall while his scream filled the hallway.

Root turned around and grinned at Shaw who was leaning against the other wall still catching her breath.

“Overprotective” Shaw mumbled standing up and not even glancing at the crying guard as they walked back toward the exit.

“Married.” Root replied, stopping Shaw as soon as they got outside and gently grabbing her injured arm.

“It’s fine” Shaw snapped pulling her arm back and Root frowned. “Did you upload the virus?”

“Mhm” Root said. “Hopefully they learn their lesson about stealing classified information.”

Shaw quickly inspected her arm, before putting part of her t-shirt between her teeth and tearing a piece off, one handedly tying it around the wound to stop it bleeding.

“It’s fine huh?” Root said watching her.

“I had him you know” Shaw said switching the subject trying to walk off but Root stopped her, grabbing her arm so they were facing each other, Shaw went to take a step back but backed right into the wall.

“What was that thing you were saying about not having to do everything alone?” Root asked and Shaw just rolled her eyes. “I’m serious, Sam.”

“I can handle six guards, you know I can” Shaw said and Root just looked at her.

“I know” she said, her tone changing, suddenly a lot softer. “I’m just saying, you don’t have to.”

Shaw couldn’t avoid Root’s eyes even if she wanted to. When Root looked at her, it was always a fixated gaze, it was intense and always lusty. Dark eyes tracking her every movement. She remembered telling Root the exact same thing, she remembered Root saying those three little fucking words. For the first time, she knew how Root felt. Kind of.

“Did you have to tell him I was your wife though?” Shaw asked with a slight change of subject, matching her tone close to Root’s, knowing their was zero point in trying to argue.

“I tell everyone” Root said with a small smile.

“You what?”

“It’s fun” Root said bumping her knee against Shaw’s “Getting to call you my wife.”

“No” Shaw said suddenly putting her hands on Root’s stomach and pushing her away, immediately starting to walk off.

“No what?” Root said and chased after her.

“You can’t just…”

“Can’t just what?” Root asked “Call you my wife? Even though that’s what you are, _wife_ ”

Don’t. The word was formed in Shaw’s mouth but it didn’t come out.

“You must have done it at least once by now” Root said and Shaw ignored her, but Root smirked, knowing her silence meant it was a yes. “Who was it?”

“Nobody.” Shaw replied.

“Oh it was someone we know then” Root said springing along beside Shaw, as several drops of rain began to fall around them.

“Do you have a mute switch?” Shaw asked refusing to look at Root.

“You know the answer is no” Root smirked “And are you going to tell me or should I start guessing?”

“You won’t guess” Shaw said trying to stop her.

“Okay” Root said “Was it Harold?”

Shaw immediately stopped walking, turning to Root and glaring at her. “Did The Machine tell you that because I swear to god”

Root’s eyes suddenly widened when she realised she had guessed it right.

“You called me your _wife_ in front of Harry?” she exclaimed and Shaw just frowned.

“No”

“You did!” Root squealed and Shaw exhaled loudly with mild embarrassment causing her chest to tighten a little. “Baby!”

“No stop it” Shaw protested “No pet names.”

“Did you do it while I was gone?” Root asked “Was that why you needed to go and see Harry? To tell him never to mention it to me, ever?”

Shaw’s jaw clenched as she watched Root’s smile growing on her face, and then suddenly through a wave of frustration and annoyance she grabbed Root by the front of her jacket and kissed her hard. Their lips crashing together before Shaw pushed her away, turning briskly on her heel and kept walking.

“That’s your mute button” Shaw said. “And I hope you enjoyed this, because we’re never going on a mission together ever again.”

“But Sam” Root pouted behind her.

“You’re a pain in my ass” Shaw said trying to keep ahead of Root, there was silence for a few moments before Root replied.

“It’s such a cute ass though” Root said.

“Case and point” Shaw said “You’re like a puppy, you keep getting distracted by everything.”

“Case and point your ass is great” Root said from behind her and Shaw spun around again to glare at her.

“What?” Root shrugged “Where’s the lie?”

“If you get distracted by my ass that easily then you’re definitely going to get yourself shot” Shaw said in a huff. “And only probably by me.” she muttered.

“I’ll take that chance” Root smirked and Shaw rolled her eyes.

“No, Root, you won’t because we’re not doing this ever again.”

“Even She knows we make a great team, Sam” Root pointed out. “The only reason it bothers you now is because we’re married, I’ve always checked out your ass, you can’t tell me you never get distracted.”

“Not really” Shaw said.

“I don’t believe you” Root said skipping in front of Shaw and walking backwards so she could look at her.

“Why would I lie to you, _wife_ ” Shaw said practically through gritted teeth, the word still felt like sand in her mouth, but the look on Root’s face almost made it worth while. “I didn’t know it was that easy to make you blush” Shaw said with a smirk brushing past Root and leaving her standing there staring after her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Marriage is quite a journey, especially when you never even thought it would happen to you like these two!  
> Forever super appreciative all your support! x


	16. The Distraction

It was Shaw’s turn to make dinner. It was part of their new Let’s Be Married deal, where they did stupid shit like going grocery shopping together and actually making food instead of constantly ordering take out. And much to Shaw’s annoyance, it actually wasn’t half that bad, although several failed past attempts had resulted in ordering pizza, they were now almost convincing well adjusted members of society. That was until Root burned herself on the frying pan then tried to convince Shaw to get a matching scar, it was also before they had almost smoked out Root’s entire apartment and set off every fire alarm in the building when they forgot there was something in the oven while they were taking body shots off each other.

But tonight it seemed under control. Root was taking a shower, Shaw was in the kitchen. Everything was not a total disaster.

Then Root appeared.

Shaw heard her come across the room, the floorboards squeaked softly as she padded quietly into the kitchen.

“What are you making?” Root asked wrapping her arms around Shaw’s waist and pressing her body into Shaw’s back. Shaw went to answer, then paused, something felt strange. She could feel Root against, but it was something else, something almost wet. Turning around she saw that Root was naked, and not only was she naked, she was also dripping wet, straight out of the shower.

“I’m not more effective than a towel you know” Shaw said and Root smirked. Shaw looked at the various fading bruises and bite marks that painted Root’s skin across her shoulders, her hair was pulled up messily on top of her head. It was almost unusual for Root to have her hair up, and Shaw quickly realised she was staring before turning back to the food prep.

“I didn’t realise it was that distracting” Root said and Shaw suddenly realised what this was about.

“I think you did” she answered keeping her back to Root. But Root just wrapped her arms around Shaw again from the back, running her hands up Shaw’s stomach and up to her chest, letting out a warm exhale on the crook of Shaw’s neck.

“You’re cheating” Shaw said without flinching at Root’s touch.

“How?” Root asked.

“You’re touching me” Shaw said “You get distracted without me touching you.”

“Fine” Root said and pulled herself away from Shaw.

“It’s not going to work” Shaw said and Root just lifted an eyebrow.

“We’ll see about that” Root said getting two glasses and pouring whiskey into each one, before taking a sip of and pulling herself up onto the kitchen counter.

Shaw frowned “Get your naked ass off the counter”

“Does it bother you?” Root smirked “You didn’t mind when you had me pinned up here the other morning”

“I wasn’t making food” Shaw pointed out and Root just took another sip of whiskey.

Shaw sighed and went back to focusing on dinner, knowing that whatever Root was going to throw at her she would be able to work through. Naked Root, hardly enough to throw her.

She focused on cutting vegetables, and wondered how a perky psychopath assassin managed to domesticate her at all. Then she heard a gasp. She wants you to turn around, Shaw reminded herself immediately. Besides, Root gasped at a lot of things, from a pretty cupcake to finding new code. Shaw ignored her. Cut the vegetables, do not turn around. It was simple. Then came another sound, it was soft almost muffled, and then a sharp intake of breath. Shaw forced herself not to glance over her shoulder, not to even wonder what Root was up to, determined not to let her win. It was quiet for a couple of steady moments, Shaw used the knife to slide all the cut up vegetables onto the tray, then as she went to pick it up she heard a soft groan. She paused, both hands on the tray, taking a second to force herself not to look at Root, who she knew was still in the kitchen. She picked up the tray and turned towards the stove, but immediately caught sight of Root from her peripherals. Root, who was laying on the kitchen counter, toes curled around the edge, cheeks pink, legs spread, fingering herself.

The tray fell from Shaw’s hands as she turned to Root, clattering loudly onto the ground sending vegetables in every direction.

Her jaw fell open in disbelief, Root opened her eyes hearing the crash and looked at Shaw with a satisfied smirk. Shaw’s eyes trailed her body, then she quickly tried to pull herself back together.

“That’s the quietest you’ve ever been” Shaw said and Root pulled her fingers from herself and licked them.

“I can’t say the same for you” Root said and glanced at the vegetables strewn across the floor.

“That was not distraction, that was shock” Shaw said and moved closer to the counter.

“But you’re distracted now” Root said reaching out and walking her two wet fingers up Shaw’s stomach.

“Stop it” Shaw said.

“Never.” Root replied.

Shaw picked up the glass of whiskey Root poured her and took a sip before downing the whole lot.

“I’m guessing it’s pizza for dinner then” Root smirked and Shaw put a hand on Root’s throat, leaning right down until their noses were touching at the ends.

“And who’s fault is that?” Shaw asked quirking an eyebrow, but Root just kissed her. Gently, slowly, parting Shaw’s lips and running her tongue over them.

“Wanna help me crank up my volume?” Root asked her lips against Shaw’s before kissing the corner of her mouth.

*

Distracting became a game fairly quickly. And it became a competition even faster. Shaw did not like losing, and no one knew that better than Root who merrily reminded her of the fallen vegetables for hours and days after the incident. Shaw could distract Root by just breathing differently, but watching her get frustrated over it became something of a new hobby. But then it was time for payback. Shaw had been thinking about it for a couple of days now, pretending that the whole distracting thing was no longer bothering her, as much as Root continued to rub it in her face. She thought about what she could do that would distract Root the most, she considered kitchen payback, but realised wasted food was not something she was aiming for, not to mention, Root in the kitchen was an easy target. She got her in the kitchen almost daily. All it took was hands on her hips while she made coffee, or a bite on the neck and Root had entirely forgotten what she had been trying to do.

But Root at work, well, that could be a fun game. She didn’t so much want to traumatise Harold, but fuck it would be funny.

Shaw came back that afternoon after dealing with a number, Root was in Harold’s library with a laptop and several cables connecting in different directions. Shaw leaned against the doorway and watched Root for a moment, the concentration showing on her face, her long fingers stroking the keyboard. Why did she have to look hot, doing pretty much everything Shaw wondered, it was annoying as it sounded.

“Hey _Wife_ ” Shaw said loudly and Root jumped looking over at Shaw, at the sound of _that_ particular word.

“That’s me” Root said with a slight smile.

“It’s been two months” Shaw said coming into the library and running her finger along one of the bookshelves. She felt Root watching her.

“I know” Root said.

“That’s weird” Shaw said and stopped behind Root’s chair.

“Does it feel like longer?” Root asked her tipping her head back to look at Shaw.

“Like forever, and two seconds at the same time” Shaw said leaned down to kiss Root’s lips. Root tipped her head back up and turned to look at Shaw.

“You’re being abnormally soft” Root said “What happened?”

“Why do you assume something happened?”

“Because when you’ve had a good day I get thrown against a wall” Root smirked.

“My day’s been fine” Shaw said and sat on the edge of the table beside Root’s laptop, resting her foot on the chair between Root’s legs. Root looked at Shaw’s foot before looking back at her.

“Are you trying to make fuck me in the break room sound casual?” Root asked lifting an eyebrow “Because we don’t have a break room, but I’m pretty sure Harry won’t be back for at least twenty minutes.”

Shaw smirked “Actually not why I’m here.”

Root frowned “Well now I’m worried.”

“Really?”

“You come in here acting uncharacteristically coy, you kiss me like a feather, put your foot between my legs and you don’t want me to eat you out, or murder someone?”

“Well when you put it that way” Shaw said with an amused smirk moving her foot off the chair and instead she straddled Root’s lap. It was automatic for Root to put her arms around Shaw’s waist, one finger hooking into the belt loop at the back of Shaw’s jeans.

“If I ask if you’re okay will you give me an answer and not bite or handcuff me to this chair?” Root asked.

“No guarantees” Shaw said leaning her arms over Root’s shoulders.

“You’d tell me…right?” Root said quietly and Shaw rolled her eyes.

“Root, stop” she said “You seem to forget I’m a sociopath…no feelings, usually means I’m okay like all the time”

“I know but,” Root’s eyes ran over Shaw as she swallowed “It’s different with me”

“Do you think I’m trying to divorce you or something?” Shaw asked.

“Or ask me out, it’s hard to tell” Root said with a slight smirk creeping onto her face.

Shaw rolled her eyes. “Actually there were just a couple of things I wanted to tell you”

Root suddenly frowned. “Is that why you’re being weird?”

“I’m not being weird, Root” Shaw said tucking a strand of Root’s hair behind her ear, Root glanced to the side where Shaw just moved her hair.

“Tell me.”

Shaw just stared at her.

“Now, Sam.”

“Okay” Shaw said lifting her hands on Root’s shoulders in surrender. “When I went to go see Harold that time after you’d come back…you kind of said something as I left”

Root looked at her curiously.

“I didn’t know if I should tell you or not, because you were mostly asleep, but I thought it was kinda important” Shaw said with a shrug.

“What?” Root demanded her eyes desperately searching Shaw’s face.

“You told me you loved me” Shaw said without a single expression showing on her face. Root stared at her in silence. Neither of them moved. They heard Harold come back in downstairs. Shaw still straddling Root’s lap, she didn’t move. Root’s eyes locked on Shaw’s. Finally Root blinked, her face softening.

“And?” she said quietly.

“Well that’s…” Shaw almost frowned, not knowing what kind of reaction she had originally expected, but she hadn’t assumed it was going to be…this one. “You’ve never said that before.”

“But I think it everyday” Root said.

Shaw looked at her. “You do?”

“I do” Root said and with a smirk lifted her hand up between them, wiggling her finger with the wedding ring on it in Shaw’s face.

“Oh” Shaw said.

“What was the second thing?” Root asked.

Shaw looked at her and smiled a little as she rolled her eyes and glanced up at the ceiling.

“Um” she said biting her bottom lip to stop her smiling. “I win.”

It only took Root a split second to figure out what Shaw was talking about and her eyes suddenly widened, and she reached for her taser that was sitting on the table behind them. Shaw quickly leaned into Root, pressing their bodies together and making it harder for Root to reach the desk with Shaw’s full weight on her. Root growled softly her lips against Shaw’s shoulder, she opened her mouth and bit down hard.

“Ouch” Shaw practically yelped at Root’s genuinely pissed off bite just as Harold came around the corner and caught sight of them, his eyes widening in shock he quickly tried to look away.

“Root” Shaw said trying to wiggle away and push Root off at the same time.

“That was not fair Sameen” Root said frowning.

“The point is to distract” Shaw said with a shrug “And you were distracted” Root dug her fingers into Shaw’s thighs, and didn’t stop until Shaw scrunched her nose up in pain.

“You can’t use my ‘I love you’ to distract me, Sam” Root growled “And you touched me.”

“The touching rule was broken a long time ago” Shaw reminded her and Root shot her a glare. “Anyway the I love you thing kind of just turned into an I love you too thing.”

Root suddenly froze, her hands resting on Shaw’s thighs as she stared at the woman who was sitting on top of her, in absolute awe.

“Sameen…” Root’s voice was nothing more than a breath. Shaw just stared at her, dark eyes, expressionless face, like every muscle was relaxed, her arms still draped over Root’s shoulders, a strand of hair wrapped around one of Shaw’s fingers, unnoticed by Root.

Root didn’t know what to say, or rather she couldn’t find any words. She wasn’t even sure that what she had just heard had been accurate. But she was positive that Shaw had just said I love you.

“Are you still trying to distract me?” Root asked eventually.

“No.” Shaw said simply. Root’s hand ran up Shaw’s stomach, over her chest, her fingers hooking into the top of Shaw’s tank as she ran her fingers across the fabric.

“You know, you don’t have to say it because you think I want to hear it” Root said quietly.

“I didn’t” Shaw said.

“But you…”

“It’s there, somewhere” Shaw said “Even if I can’t _feel_ it, I know it’s probably there.”

“I never thought I’d hear you say that” Root said unable to help the smile on her face.

“Neither” Shaw said.

“I never say it because I don’t want to make it uncomfortable” Root said.

“Root” Shaw said almost with a sigh “I don’t get uncomfortable.”

“I love you, Sam.” Root said suddenly and Shaw widened her eyes a little.

“I know” Shaw said and started to stand up “I’m getting off you, but only because Harold is right there.” Shaw said her voice low knowing Harold was just down the corridor at his desk.

“You can sit on me forever, sweetie” Root said with a smirk, letting the moment wash over her as she got to her feet after Shaw.

“Tempting” Shaw said and they walked down towards Harold.

“I hope I wasn’t interrupting” Harold almost said with an element of not wanting to actually know in his voice. “You’re bleeding” he said suddenly his eyes fixed on Shaw’s shoulder.

Shaw reached up to her shoulder, her fingers touching the blood where Root’s teeth had torn her flesh.

“You vampire” Shaw said to Root whilst inspecting the blood on her fingers.

“You’re fine” Root said folding her arms. Shaw just glared at her and wiped a bloodied finger across Root’s cheek childishly. Root slapped Shaw’s hand away and quickly tried to wipe the blood away.

“So everything’s going well?” Harold asked looking between them both “Your marriage is…flourishing?”

“Like the plague” Shaw said with a smirk.

“She just told me she loves me” Root said with a mischievous twinkle in her eye.

“She what?” Harold looked shocked. Shaw rolled her eyes.

“That’s my cue.” Shaw said.

“No it’s not” Root said and grabbed her arm so she couldn’t leave. Shaw looked at Root then over at Harold.

“This is what my life has become, Harold” Shaw said and Harold almost smiled. “I would choke her, but she’d enjoy it too much.”

The smile left Harold’s face almost instantly at the comment, and Root just dug her nails into Shaw’s skin.

“Well I’m sure there’s a more diplomatic way…” Harold began but then his voice trailed off as he realised he was talking to a sociopath and a perky psycho.“Never mind.” he muttered getting up.

“So it came to my attention” he said opening the cupboard to retrieve something “That I never got you a wedding gift.”

Root automatically let go of Shaw as Harold pulled a perfectly wrapped white box out from the cupboard and put it on his desk.

“Oh god” Shaw mumbled as Root’s eyes lit up with excitement.

“You didn’t have to, Harry!” Root said already stepping forward to claim the box picking it up and gasping “Oh it’s heavy!”

“Maybe it’s weights, so I can drown you” Shaw smirked and Root just grinned.

“Maybe it’s a book of all the things you secretly care about” Root said and Shaw frowned. “Oh wait, it would only have one page, and my name would be on it.”

“Is it a wife silencer, Harold?” Shaw asked.

“Mm that would be handy” Root agreed, and Shaw just rolled her eyes. “It’s hard work living with a little shit.”

“You’re the little shit” Shaw grumbled.

“I beg to differ” Root said.

“Good for you” Shaw said.

“Sameen”

“Root?”

“Shut up.”

“You shut up,” Shaw said.

“I’m not being the little shit here,” Root argued.

“You don’t have to _be_ the little shit, you _are_ the little shit” Shaw said.

Harold looked between them both as this continued wondering how their marriage had even lasted two months without one of them getting extremely hostile with the other.

“You know” Harold interjected “Feel free to take this conversation….anywhere else.”

Root and Shaw both stopped to turn and look at him.

“Well on the bright side you’re almost over the three month hump” Harold quickly added which received an even more baffled look from the two of them.

“The what?” Shaw asked.

“He said hump” Root bit back a grin.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for your kind words! It honestly means so much to me when I get told my characterisation is on point! These past couple of chapters (this one included) I've been a little unsure whether I'm straying too far, especially with Sam, but I feel like it goes with the story.....  
> I hope you enjoyed this chapter....those were some big words :O  
> Let me know what you're thinking/feeling!!  
> xxxx


	17. Three Month Hump

“I thought the three month hump was only when you were dating” Root frowned, to anyone passing by it looked as if she were having a conversation with herself. But Shaw’s voice replied almost instantly in her ear.

“Technically we never dated, Root” Shaw answered.

“Oh my god” Root said suddenly in realisation “You’re right, this is our dating period, from when we got married.”

“I don’t really think other peoples dating rules apply to us” Shaw said but Root wasn’t listening.

“What if we don’t make it Shaw?”

“For god sake” Shaw mumbled, she had been coming back from a run with Bear when Root had told her to go to the grocery store because she wanted nachos. Shaw couldn’t be bothered protesting, so now she was back in Hell with Bear waiting patiently outside while she circled the aisles trying to find corn chips.

“Don’t you think if we were going to kill each other it would have happened already” Shaw said her voice low, well aware of the other people around her, her finger tracing the ear piece in her ear.

“What if it happens this month?” Root said sounding genuinely concerned.

“Are you planning on murdering me this month?” Shaw asked staring at the twelve different kinds of corn chips before giving up and grabbing the bag right in front of her.

“No” Root said “But what if one of us just snaps like…. if you don’t like what I got you or something”

Shaw paused “You got me something?”

“Yeah, Sam” Root said distractedly.

Shaw mentally cursed and wondered why it hadn’t occurred to her earlier that of course Root was going to get her a christmas present.

“It’s christmas, Root” Shaw reminded her “You love christmas, nothing bad will happen.”

“Why doesn’t this concern you, Sameen?” Root asked, Shaw could hear her doing something but she couldn’t figure out what it was, it almost sounds like…sawing.

“Because we’re not normal people” Shaw said “If our marriage was going to fail it would have done it in the first week we decided to try”

Root let out a loud exhale “That’s really cute, baby.”

Shaw rolled her eyes, tossing the bag of chips onto the checkout and looking up to see Greta, who glanced at her with an eyebrow lifted.

“The Mrs wants nachos” Shaw just said shaking her head and Greta smirked.

“So you moved in with her?”

“Whose that Sam?” Root’s voice asked “Did you just call me ‘The Mrs’?”

Shaw rolled her eyes ignoring Root.

“None of your business” Shaw said to both Root and Greta.

“It is my business” Root shot back.

“Can I say I told you so?” Greta asked and Shaw just dropped the money in front of her, grabbing the corn chips and stalking off.

“No” she called back over her shoulder and Greta just grinned.

“Sameen” Root said loudly in her ear.

“God woman, shut up” Shaw said untying Bear’s leash.

“Make me” Root said and Shaw could practically see the smirk on her face. Then she heard a loud rustling sound followed by a loud bang.

“What was that?” Shaw asked.

“Nothing” Root replied.

“You realise I’m halfway home, so if you’ve started house renovations I’m going to find out” Shaw said.

“Have a little faith, Sam” Root said sounding out of breath.

“Tell yourself that” Shaw said “You’re the one who thinks our marriage is doomed.”

“I didn’t say that” Root protested.

“Sounded like it” Shaw said trying to listen to the background sounds on Root’s end.

“I don’t want to clean up someone else’s blood either” Shaw added.

“I’m not murdering someone, Sam” Root assured her.

“Then what are you doing?” Shaw asked running up the stairs of the apartment building with Bear, then creeping down the hallway and suddenly throwing open the front door.

“Nothing….” Root said but her voice trailed off when she spun around and saw Shaw and Bear standing behind her, she quickly tried to conceal the giant pine tree that touching the ceiling.

Shaw looked at Root then the tree, and Bear ran forward sniffing around it.

“Did you cut that down?” Shaw asked.

“Um…no” Root said.

Shaw stared at the tree “Why do we need nature inside our place? I’m fine looking at trees out the window”

“It’s a christmas tree, Sam” Root rolled her eyes.

“Really?” Shaw asked “Because it kind of just looks like you cut down a perfectly good tree and tried to plant it in our living room”

Root glared at her “ _The Mrs_ wanted a christmas tree.”

Shaw looked at her and narrowed her eyes.

“I think that’s worse than calling me your wife” Root smirked and Shaw rolled her eyes.

“Fuck off.”

“No” Root said stepping closer to Shaw instead.

“I’m not going to kiss you” Shaw frowned and Root just smiled.

“You don’t have to” she said sliding a single finger into the top of Shaw’s jeans and yanking her closer before placing a soft kiss on Shaw’s forehead.

“I hate you” Shaw grumbled and Root kissed the spot beside Shaw’s eye, then her cheek and down her face until she kissed the corner of Shaw’s mouth. Their faces close, looking at each other with dark eyes.

“Do you like our tree?” Root asked.

“No” Shaw replied.

“But you like me?”

“No, I like the dog” Shaw said.

“What if I tied you to the tree with fairy lights and fucked you?” Root asked her lips grazing against Shaw’s as she spoke.

“No, again” Shaw said. Root quirked an eyebrow at the challenge and moved her hand so her fingers slipped into Shaw’s jeans, but before she could move it further down Shaw grabbed her wrist and stopped her.

“Sex will not excuse you for the tree living in our home” Shaw said.

“It was worth a shot” Root said “Besides you’re kind of turned on, I can tell.”

“Wrong” Shaw said quickly, even though Root was right.

“Liar” Root whispered catching Shaw’s bottom lip between her teeth and dragging her teeth across it slowly, before slipping her knee between Shaw’s legs, reaching around till she had a handful of Shaw’s ass and pulling her forward. “It might not be the idea of fairy lights, but it’s definitely me.”

Shaw felt the blood rushing around her body “Get off me” she growled.

“Emotion might not be your forte Sam, but you can’t conceal arousal” Root smirked.

“I’m not” Shaw began but Root cut her off.

“Your pupils are dilated, sweetie” Root said dragging her lips across Shaw’s cheek.

“Maybe that’s because you’ve got me by the ass,” Shaw said her voice low “And I can feel you trying to get me off on your knee.”

“Is it working?” Root asked moving her knee a little between Shaw’s legs.

Shaw smirked pressed her lips against Root’s good ear. “No.” she whispered in Root’s left ear, before pulling back, pushing Root off her and looking at the tree.

“Get the fairy lights” Shaw said and Root looked excited. “For the tree.” Shaw added rolling her eyes.

*

“Remind me again why we haven’t opened Harold’s wedding gift yet?” Shaw asked the next morning staring at the white box that was sitting under the newly decorated tree.

“We can’t have it until we’re past three months” Root said sitting on the kitchen counter in nothing but fluffy socks and a big t-shirt, eating cornflakes from the box.

“I don’t think that’s how wedding presents are meant to work” Shaw said turning away from the tree and taking a sip of coffee.

“I’m making the rules” Root said and Shaw rolled her eyes.

“Don’t you always.”

Root just glared at her.

“You know if I cared, I’d probably be upset that you think we won’t last” Shaw said walking over to Root putting her mug down and loosely shoving Root’s legs apart, pulling her to the edge of the counter so their bodies were touching.

“Is that your way of telling me you’re upset that I’m concerned?” Root asked looking down at Shaw.

“No, I was trying to tell you nicely that your paranoia is annoying” Shaw said.

“Sameen,” Root pouted and Shaw just looked at her.

“Why would this suddenly go wrong Root?” Shaw asked.

“I don’t know” Root frowned and Shaw just smirked feeling Root’s legs wrap around her waist.

“Think about it” Shaw said “If this stops, so does this” she said moving her hand under Root’s giant t-shirt and slipping her fingers between Root’s legs, making her cheeks flush a light shade of pink.

“You think we like touching each other too much for anything to go wrong?” Root asked softly.

“Precisely” Shaw said with a shrug “No one else is gonna let you drip candle wax on them.”

Root tipped her head to the side as she looked at Shaw, a smile twitching at the corners of her mouth.

“I love you” she said with a certain nonchalance in her tone, it was like the way she asked Shaw to pass her coffee, or how automatically she would just kiss her in the morning.

“I know” Shaw answered simply.

Suddenly Root’s gaze went vacant, and Shaw knew that it was The Machine, figuring their slow morning was over she pulled away from Root who didn’t protest, finishing her coffee she went into the bedroom and started pulling her clothes on. A few minutes later Root came in, dropping the t-shirt onto the floor so she was in nothing except for the pink fuzzy socks.

Shaw tried not to stare at Root whilst she tucked her gun into the back of her jeans. Her eyes were following the curves of Root’s body as she pulled her jacket on, when Root turned around and caught her.

“How’s the view?” Root smirked pulling her jeans on.

“Not bad” Shaw said “What did She want?”

“She wants you to help me today” Root said hooking her bra behind her back and then pulling on a top.

“Root” Shaw said “We talked about this.”

“She wouldn’t ask if She didn’t think I needed you, Sam” Root said.

“And if I say no?” Shaw lifted an eyebrow.

“If you say yes I’ll drop the whole three month comments,” Root said walking over to where Shaw was standing by the bedroom door.

“That important huh?” Shaw asked and Root just kissed her cheek as she brushed past.

“You’re the one who started that whole you don’t need to do it alone thing, Sam” Root said pulling on her motorcycle gloves.

“You’re the one who can’t hold your focus when I’m around” Shaw argued.

“That’s not true” Root frowned.

“It is” Shaw said and looked at her “Our dynamic is different now, you gotta see that.”

“You don’t want me to get hurt” Root said.

“I don’t care if you get shot Root, I just don’t want it to be because of me” Shaw shrugged.

“The Machine thinks I need you on this one, Sameen” Root said “And I trust her, if she thinks it’s important I’m not going to get distracted. Besides you can’t tell me to ask for help and then not want me to come to you for it.”

Shaw groaned. “Fine” she said finally “But I’m only doing it for Her, because Her judgement is…annoyingly accurate, and I told you that before I realised my help could distract you and get us both killed.”

“It’s better that we both die then have Reese help and I die anyway” Root shrugged and Shaw just glared at her.

“Why would you say that?”

“Let’s go, Sam” Root said tossing her a helmet and walking towards the door.

*

Shaw felt like she was on edge all day, there was even a brief moment where she thought that Root may have been more concentrated than her. She didn’t know what this annoying feeling was that seemed to be clinging to her back with every single thing that she did.

She was hyper aware of their surroundings as they broke into a Vigilance office in the middle of Manhattan, tasked with getting a copy of a coded radio message. Shaw was well aware of how dangerous this could get, she knew Root understood that as well. Root had barely said anything to her all day, Shaw wondered if it was because she wanted to show her she was focused, or whether maybe it was about something else entirely. That was the thing with Root, sometimes Shaw thought she got her, and other times it felt like she didn’t understand her all all.

Shaw had her gun pulled as The Machine issued instructions through Root, making sure the coast was clear before they proceeded through any door, or hallway.

“Stairs to the left” Root said from behind her. Shaw pushed the door open to the stairs glancing up and listening for any sign of footsteps, when all she heard was silence she started up the stairs. Root close behind her.

“When we get there, don’t wait outside, we both go in, if anyone finds us we destroy the computer” Root said to her as they climbed several stories up, stopping outside Level 6.

Shaw just nodded. Root stepped in front of her to take the lead. They quickly moved down the hallway and into the unlocked office. Shaw followed her round to the computer, hovering behind Root with her eyes fixed on the door.

She glanced at Root briefly but only because a waft of her sugary sweet perfume drifted up to Shaw’s nose.

“Why did you wear that?” Shaw asked through gritted teeth.

“I always wear it” Root said without looking away from the screen.

“No you don’t” Shaw said “You wear it when we have sex.”

“Maybe you only notice it then because I’m on top of you naked.”

Shaw rolled her eyes.

“Done” Root said quickly signing out of the computer and yanking a USB out of the side, slipping it into her jacket. “Let’s get out of here.”

Shaw led the way back towards the stairwell, everything was quiet except the sound of their footsteps. Too quiet, almost.

As they reached the stairway door Shaw swung around seeing a man come flying out of the other set of stairs with his gun pointed straight at them.

“Root” Shaw yelled, but Root had seen him too. Shaw threw the door open to try and get Root to safety, but Root had drawn her gun and was trying to step around Shaw to get a clear shot. Shaw slammed her hand into Root’s shoulder to force her back.

Then a gun fired.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Is "I love you" "I know" their new little cute thing? Ugh.
> 
> You're all so lovely with your comments, thank you so much for reading!


	18. It Hurts

A second gun shot echoed down the hallway and the man fell to the ground. Root stumbled backwards through the door followed by Shaw, her voice filled the stairwell.  
 ****

“Fuck” Shaw groaned loudly, her eyes wanting to roll back in her head at the pain that was shooting through her hand like white hot fire. The sound of the gun shots echoing through her head.

Shaw tried to take several deep breaths, her eyes squeezed tightly shut, before she could face looking at her hand. When she opened her eyes, it was soaked in red, blood dripping into a puddle on the floor.

A bullet wound, straight through the palm of her left hand. Her breath caught in her throat as she looked over at Root, who was slumped against the wall, her face deathly pale, she was struggling to keep her eyes open.

“Root” Shaw said using her good hand to grab Root by the chin and force her to look Shaw in the eyes. Their eyes met, then Shaw looked down at Root’s chest, and saw the blood soaking through her top underneath her jacket.

“Shit” Shaw growled yanking Root’s jacket down to get a better look at the wound.

“It’s okay” Root said weakly, and Shaw just glanced at her shaking her head. Pulling Root’s top down by the neckline she saw a hole in Root’s chest. Less than an inch from her heart.

Shaw felt like she might throw up. Her hand had saved Root.

“The bullet’s still in your chest” Shaw said seeing energy draining from Root who was blinking slowly. “We need to get you to hospital.”

“No, it’s fine” Root said sleepily “You can do it.”

Shaw looked at her, jaw clenched and shook her head. “I can’t, Root.”

“Why not?” Root asked, but Shaw wasn’t listening, she looked down the stairwell and wondered whether she was actually going to make it down there with Root in time. Figuring it was the only chance she had she scooped Root up into her arms, despite the agonising pain that was rippling through her hand and started down the stairs.

“Reese” she growled into her earpiece, and seconds later his voice replied.

“Yeah Shaw?”

“Root’s been shot, I’ve gotta get her to hospital, like right now.”

Reese paused “Is she…”

“She’ll be alright, bullet just missed her heart, it went through my hand” Shaw said feeling anger creeping up inside her.

“How the hell?” Reese asked.

“We both tried to stop each other from getting shot, fucking stupid girl tried to step in front of me” Shaw said shaking her head “She could have just let it hit my arm.”

“You’re forgetting she cares about you,” Reese said.

“It’s clouding her judgement” Shaw said bursting out into the lobby with Root, seeing an ambulance waiting out front with Reese in the drivers seat.

*

Shaw disliked hospitals. She had spent a lot of endless hours in them when she was training to be a surgeon. Exhausted hours, fluorescent lights, rushing everywhere. She was almost glad she had been kicked out. She couldn’t even imagine what she would be like if she was in this place every goddamn week.

The smell was starting to get to her as she sat in the waiting room, her knee bouncing up and down impatiently. Her hand sporting a giant white bandage, with more than the average amount of painkillers dancing around inside her body to subdue the pain.

Shaw leapt to her feet when Root’s surgeon emerged from the room across the hallway.

“Can I see her?” Shaw asked immediately.

“Yes, but” the surgeon tried to keep talking but Shaw stepped around her. “She lost a lot of blood.”

Shaw pushed the door open into Root’s recovery room and kicked it shut behind her, the sound causing Root’s eyes to flash open.

“Nice gown, loser” Shaw said walking over to the end of the bed, looking at Root’s hospital gown, that was pulled loosely to the side where Shaw could see the giant patch over her wound. Root looked exhausted, darkness rimmed under her eyes, she was pale, washed out, her lips dry, her hair messily pulled away from her face and the wound.

Shaw looked away, glancing down at the clipboard at the end of the bed and letting her eyes skim over Root’s chart.

“How’s your hand?” Root asked her voice hoarse.

“Fractured bones, six stitches.” Shaw said and looked at Root. “Hurts.”

“Sam, I’m…” Root began.

“Don’t.” Shaw cut her off and walked over to the window, peering out at the dull New York day. Root went silent. “That bullet almost hit your heart.” Shaw said after a few moments and turned back to Root.

“I know, you’re my knight in shining armour” Root said and Shaw just stared at her.

“It could have killed you.” Shaw said.

“It didn’t.”

“It would have if I wasn’t already trying to push you back.” Shaw said and Root could only stare at her helplessly.

“Sam stop it, I’m fine” Root tried.

“You don’t look fine” Shaw said and walked over so she was standing beside Root’s bed, their fingers inches away from touching.

“Looks can be deceiving” Root tried, a faint smile twitching at the corners of her mouth but Shaw’s face remained completely expressionless, if anything, she looked mad.

“You get to go home tomorrow.” Shaw said changing the subject staring down at their untouching fingers.

“You don’t have to stay here tonight” Root said quietly.

Shaw rolled her eyes. “As if.”

“Sameen,” Root said softly reaching one of her fingers out so it touched the top of Shaw’s. “Will you at least look at me?”

“I’m always looking at you, Root” Shaw said lifting her eyes so they met.

“Come here” Root said trying to pull Shaw closer, but Shaw put her good hand lightly on Root’s shoulder and kept her back against the bed.

“Don’t try and move” Shaw said and Root just looked at her longingly. Shaw glanced at Root’s lips before moving her hand away from the other woman.

“I’m going to get some food, want anything?” Shaw said, Root tried to hide the slightly wounded look on her face at Shaw’s casual brush off.

Root just shook her head and watched as Shaw exited the room without so much as glancing back.

*

Shaw barely slept. She spent the night on the uncomfortable armchair with her feet kicked up on Root’s bed. She had eaten copious amounts of frozen yoghurt and was distracting herself by playing Plague on her phone, creating a virus that would wipe out the worlds population seemed like the only way she could release any of her frustration without any real humans getting hurt. Plastic spoon stuffed in her mouth she tiredly stared at the screen of her phone when she heard Root’s voice.

“Sameen, it hurts” Root said her voice muffled. Shaw was suddenly on her feet, out of habit pressing the back of her fingers against Root’s forehead to check her temperature, before glancing at the drip she was hooked up to and seeing it was almost empty.

Shaw stuck her head out of the room and signalled the nurse.

“My wife needs another morphine drip” Shaw said and the nurse just nodded. “Like now, or she’ll get annoyingly loud.”

The nurse stared at her in mild confusion before quickly hurrying off down the hallway.

Shaw went back into the room and sat on the edge of Root’s bed.

“You’re being a wimp.” Shaw said running her finger down Root’s nose then pinching the end of it with two fingers.

“We can’t all be as strong as you” Root said through clenched teeth, the pain in her chest obvious.

“It’s not all that great” Shaw said looking at Root whose eyes were beginning to well up at the pain. “Hey, no, don’t do that, she’s coming with the morphine now.” Shaw said giving Root’s hand a light squeeze as the nurse came bursting through the door with a new drip. Shaw didn’t take her eyes off Root as the nurse swapped the bags over.

“It hurts” Root whimpered.

“That’s what happens when you get shot, honey” the nurse said giving Root’s arm a light rub as the morphine started to flow again. Shaw almost smirked at the comment and glanced at Root as if to say _I told you so_.

“Better?” the nurse asked less than thirty seconds later and Root just nodded.

“What have you been doing this whole time?” Root asked once the nurse had left.

“Giving myself a brain freeze with frozen yoghurt, and killing people off with various bacterial infections” Shaw said sitting back down on the armchair.

“Sounds like quite the night” Root said with a small smile.

“Single handedly conquering the world” Shaw said and held up her injured hand “Literally.” she added with a smirk and that got Root to smile.

“I guess this is going to put a damper on our whole rough sex thing” Root said and Shaw just rolled her eyes.

“Whose fault is that?” Shaw said and silence fell between them. Root blinked slowly, trying to hold her eyes open as sleep tried to take over.

“Go back to sleep” Shaw told her leaning back in the armchair and Root looked at her, before drifting off again.

*

By the time they got home some of the colour had returned to Root’s face, and she was surviving on a combination of various painkillers to keep the wound at bay.

Bear sniffed around both of them before quietly settling down on his bed, and Shaw started frustratedly yanking off her jacket with only one hand. Root came up behind her and eased it off her injured hand.

“So are we going to talk about this?” Root asked and Shaw turned to look at her.

“What?”

“Don’t pretend you’re not mad.” Root said leaning against the back of the sofa. Shaw clenched her jaw, she should have realised this was about to come as soon as they walked through the door.

“If we talk about it are you going to apologise?” Shaw asked folding her arms lightly.

“Why would I?” Root asked glaring at her “You wouldn’t have made that shot, Sam, you were facing the other direction.”

“You know that was a fucking idiotic move you made,” Shaw said her voice low and angry “He would have hit the door, or grazed my arm at the absolute worst if you had just fucking stayed back.”

Root just stared at her, almost in disbelief.

“Why can’t you just admit you’re wrong?” Shaw asked anger flooding her voice.

“I’m not going to apologise for saving your life” Root said and Shaw frowned.

“You didn’t.” Shaw said bluntly. “You almost got both of us killed.”

Root looked pissed off and hurt at the same time, she looked away from Shaw, staring at the wall with a frown twitching between her eyes.

“This isn’t working” Shaw said finally.

“What isn’t?” Root asked cautiously, looking back at Shaw and knowing that look on her face was nothing good.

“You’re making too many amateur mistakes” Shaw staring straight at Root.

“Sameen,” Root’s voice was almost a plea, she knew what was about to come and she felt her chest tighten.

“I can’t do this,” Shaw said. “You’re not invincible, and I’m not worth your life.”

Tears unwillingly welled up in Root’s eyes, her teeth clenched together as she stared at Shaw who gave her one last look before turning towards the door. Root couldn’t find words, she couldn’t get past the pain, worse than the bullet wound, this felt like her heart was being torn from her chest. She watched Shaw walk towards the door, feeling like all she could do was watch her go.

“Please don’t leave me,” Root whispered as Shaw opened the door, glancing over her shoulder when Root spoke. Shaw didn’t know what else to say, she didn’t know what to do with the anger in her chest that was binding her like metal chains.

“Get some rest,” was all that came out of Shaw’s mouth as she slipped through the door and quietly shut it behind her.

“I need you…” Root said before dissolving into tears as she stared at the closed door, feeling everything inside her start to tremble. She let herself slide down onto the floor, Bear immediately coming to her side sensing her distress. She dug her fingers into his fur and tried to ignore the fact that he smelt like Shaw.

Root didn’t cry, not a lot. She didn’t usually have a reason to. But she couldn’t stop the tears falling down her cheeks and hitting the wooden floor. She couldn’t fix her breathing, she couldn’t stop her hands shaking, or the gasps for air as her chest tightened and pulled and felt as though it was being ripped open. It hurt, more than the bullet. More than anything she had ever felt in her life. Shaw had become her world, and what were you meant to do when your world suddenly disappeared?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Everyone take a deep breath.  
> How are you feeling? Or should I not ask.....  
> x


	19. I Won't Let You Go

“You just _left_ her?” Reese asked. They were sitting on the rooftop of a high rise building using the sniper rifle to watch a new number in his office. Reese was eating a sandwich, Shaw had her eye pressed to the eyehole of the gun.

“She’s better off without me,” Shaw said unemotionally.

“Did you consider the fact she might have a different opinion on that?” Reese asked and Shaw tilted her head back to stare at him.

“Root always has a different opinion on everything I say,” Shaw said “Stop being my therapist.”

“Therapy would be a lot worse than this” Reese pointed out and Shaw rolled her eyes. “All I’m saying is that shouldn’t it be up to Root to decide what’s best for her?”

“No” Shaw replied looking back through the eyehole, watching the number shuffle papers at his desk. “She makes dumb decisions that almost get her killed.”

“Shaw” Reese said “She only did that for _you_ , it was instinct.”

“Her instincts suck,” Shaw shot back “Which is exactly why I can’t stay.”

“Are you sure it’s just that?” Reese asked and Shaw’s jaw clenched.

“What are you trying to imply, John?” she asked. “Be careful what you say next, because I’m armed.”

“I know she makes you happy” Reese said then paused “Or at least…less angry than you usually are, hell, I’ve even seen you smile at her, and I’ve never seen that many of your teeth before.”

“So?” Shaw asked.

“So what are you going to do?” Reese asked. “Divorce her because her natural reaction is to protect you?”

“I don’t want her to protect me,” Shaw said her jaw tight.

“You don’t get to decide that.” Reese pointed out, and Shaw sat back from the gun staring at it vacantly.

“I’m just angry” Shaw said looking at him eventually.

“I know” Reese said. “Relationships make everyone angry.”

Shaw let out a grouchy sigh.

“You can’t control how much someone cares about you, or what they’d do for you” Reese said and Shaw frowned.

“It’s weird when you talk about this” Shaw said bluntly and Reese almost smirked.

“You forget about my battle scars” he said and Shaw snatched his sandwich off him and took a bite.

“I think she makes me feel” Shaw said through a mouthful of food.

“Feel what?” Reese asked.

“I don’t know” Shaw replied “Feelings.”

“She makes you feel feelings?” Reese said “What a bitch.”

Shaw rolled her eyes “I don’t know what to do with them, sometimes I can’t even tell if they’re real.”

“But you told her you love her?” Reese said and Shaw glared at him.

“Harold tell you that?”

“No, Root did” Reese shrugged. “You make her happy too, which is almost frightening to witness, and also considering shooting people makes you smile.”

“What if next time the bullet kills her?” Shaw asked.

Reese stared at her “That’ll suck.”

Shaw rolled her eyes at his reply. “I don’t want her to die for me.”

“Then just hope like hell she won’t, but you can’t control that either.” Reese said snatching his sandwich back off her. “Stop eating my food.”

*

Shaw’s place felt empty and cold. She hadn’t been there for weeks, but everything was exactly as she had left it. The only thing in the fridge was beer so she cracked one open and took a long sip, as she sat down on the couch and pulled the bandage off her hand. It was still a little swollen and red, the stitches weren’t perfectly in line but what the fuck was she going to do about it.

She couldn’t help think about Root as she stared at her bullet wound. That stupid gangly ray of psychotic sunshine that she had married. She knew every fucking detail about her, from the scar behind her deaf ear, her slightly crooked tooth, the freckle under her chin, every facial expression, the shape of her lips, her smile…god that smile. Shaw shut her eyes and exhaled loudly. She thought about the first time she had seen Root smile, she had been holding a burning hot iron inches from Shaw’s bare chest. _“I’m kind of a big fan”_ Root had said, that stupid smile stretching across her face as they had looked at each other. Shaw had loathed her. Shaw had wanted her dead. She had wanted to put the bullets in Root herself. And now, she wanted the complete opposite, it infuriated her that there was no possible way to build a shield around Root that would keep her safe.

Shaw thought distance would be the best protector. The further away she was from Root the less chance of something happening to her…. wrong. So wrong. Shaw put her beer down on the table and lay back on the couch staring up at the ceiling.

The next thing she knew, she was being jolted from sleep by a light tapping sound on her door. Cracking her eyes open she was blinded by the daylight flooding through her window, unaware that she had even fallen asleep, she pulled herself from the couch and stumbled to the door, yanking it open without second thought.

Bear bounded inside almost knocking her over with his enthusiasm to see her. Shaw rubbed her eyes and looked up from the dog to see Root standing at the door.

“Bear was asking for you” Root said quietly. “Maybe he does like you better.”

“Didn’t know you spoke Dutch hound” Shaw said standing back to let Root in, knowing it was a lame thing to say but feeling strangely taken aback that she had suddenly appeared, as if she felt it too. The emptiness of not having the other around.

“How’s your hand feeling?” Root asked.

“It’s getting there,” Shaw said “Probably leave a gnarly scar though, how’s your chest?”

“I don’t know” Root said and Shaw immediately stepped forward, pulling Root’s top down to check the wound. “I meant, my heart kind of hurts.” Root said smiling at little at Shaw’s automatic concern, watching her take a quick step back.

Shaw looked at her and swallowed hard.

“I know you’re still mad at me for what I did” Root said. “I can see how you think it was stupid but…”

“Instinct” Shaw said and Root just looked at her.

“You said that you weren’t worth my life” Root said “But Sameen, I can’t live without you.”

Shaw frowned.

“I know you’re angry, Sam” Root said and stepped closer to her. “But I belong with you.” Root slipped a handcuff around her wrist and then put the other one around Shaw’s good hand, snapping it together before she realised what was happening. “So, we’re going to figure this out.”

Shaw stared down at their wrists, realising that Root had cuffed them together, her mouth dropping open as she looked back at Root.

“What are you doing?”

“If you pick the lock I’ll put zip ties around our wrists instead and we’d probably have to hold hands for it not to hurt,” Root said and Shaw just stared at her in shock.

“Let me go” Shaw protested.

“No.” Root said.

“This is so stupid” Shaw said and tried to turn away but her wrist yanked Root with her and she stopped to glare up at the ceiling. “How am I meant to do anything? My other hand is broken.”

“You ask me to help,” Root said looking at her “Because we’re married.”

Shaw rolled her eyes. “You could help by taking these damn things off” Shaw said and rattled the her wrist around the metal cuff.

“I’ll take them off when you get it, Sam” Root said and Shaw just stared at her.

“Get what?”

“If you die, I die too” Root said and Shaw just frowned at her.

“Don’t be-” Shaw started.

“I’m not” Root finished “I love you, Sameen, and I need you, and I want you, and chances are if someones pointing a gun at you I’m going to try and protect you and I’m sorry if that upsets you.”

Shaw just looked at her, biting hard on the end of her tongue.

“Have you considered that maybe I don’t want to live without you either?” Shaw asked.

“Then why did you walk out on me?” Root asked and Shaw fell silent. “Why, Sam?” Root pressed her.

“I was angry.” Shaw said.

“So you just leave?”

“You know that’s what I do” Shaw said going to walk away again but pulling Root with her, again.

“You can’t” Root said “Not today.”

“You’re driving me crazy” Shaw said glaring at her.

“Good.” Root replied.

 

_6 Hours Later…_

 

“This is torture” Shaw complained “Are you ever going to take these off, or are these the friendship bracelets you’ve always wanted?”

Root smirked wandering into the kitchen, dragging Shaw along with her. “Don’t be so pouty Sam, I think this is good for us.”

During the past six hours Root had taken Shaw back to their place, after deeming that Shaw’s was practically “unliveable” now, and it was making Root sad. So they walked back to their home with Bear, getting the odd glance at their wrists from people they passed who shot them looks of confusion and mild concern.

After they had mostly argued, they had almost an hour of silence.

“Root” Shaw whined. “I’m hungry and I can’t eat while I’m attached to you.”

“Are you angry?” Root asked.

“Yes” Shaw replied and Root pulled her to a stop, stepping closer and kissing her on the forehead making Shaw groan with irritation.

“Now I’m furious” Shaw said and Root kissed the end of her nose.

“I think you’re lying” Root said.

“And I think you’re annoying” Shaw replied.

“I think the fact that you care about me makes you angry” Root shot back.

“And I think handcuffing us together isn’t going to make that stop” Shaw said.

“So you admit it?” Root asked and Shaw rolled her eyes.

“I think you should shut up” Shaw said.

“Caring isn’t a weakness” Root said and Shaw stared at her.

“Yes it is” Shaw said.

“It’s a weakness everyone has then” Root said and Shaw lifted an eyebrow “Even you.” Root added. Shaw just stared at her and shook her head, before looking away and frowning. Root could tell that she was trying to process. She pulled the key from her back pocket and released Shaw’s wrist, before her own.

“Sam” she said softly and her finger brushed against Shaw’s bandaged hand. “You can’t be mad at me forever for wanting to protect you, or maybe you can… but what’s the point?”

Shaw looked at her freed wrist. “Now you say that? After six damn hours?”

“Maybe I was just mad at you” Root almost smirked “For leaving me.”

Shaw sighed. Root stepped forward closing the gap between them and wrapping her arms around Shaw, kissing her forehead lightly.

“Please don’t leave me again” Root said quietly.

“I won’t” Shaw said slipping her arms around Root’s waist and pulling her closer.

“Are you angry?” Root asked.

“Less” Shaw replied feeling Root’s body relax against her own.

“I hate fighting with you” Root said softly her lips pressed to the side of Shaw’s head. “You get that I need you, right?”

Shaw moved away from Root so she could look at her. “You get that I don’t enjoy hugs, right?”

Root smirked letting go of Shaw, knowing that her deflection meant yes.

“So our matching bullet wounds are pretty cute” Root said changing the subject and Shaw just rolled her eyes.

“Yeah Root, so cute.” Shaw answered sarcastically.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm glad you trust me ;)  
> Thoughts? Feelings? Glad they worked past their problems?


	20. The Wedding Gift

Root was home when Shaw got in. She turned around at the sound of the door opening and smiled when she saw Shaw pulling off her jacket and throwing it at the couch, before crouching down and giving Bear a wet kiss on the nose. Shaw was unaware that Root was watching as she scratched Bear’s ears and whispered something that was just out of ear shot for Root.

Shaw came into the kitchen with Bear following hot on her heels.

“Hey” she said putting her hands on Root’s hips and kissing the back of her shoulder. “I’m gonna take a shower, I smell like idiots and sweat.”

Root smiled as she felt Shaw’s lips on her shoulder but didn’t let her wife see. These moments of affection were often better left unmentioned Root found, plus there was something so soft about them she knew the second she made a big deal out of them Shaw would stop. And she didn’t want Shaw to stop. She didn’t want to stop feeling that flutter of her heart when Shaw would do something so gentle and affectionate without even being aware.

“I’m making lasagne” Root said she felt Shaw look over her shoulder studying what she was doing for a brief moment, her hands still on Root’s hips, before she pulled away.

“You’re kinda starting to dig this whole cooking thing” Shaw said as she walked towards the bathroom. Root smiled up at the ceiling.

“You’re kinda getting a little cute with your observations” Root called back unable to help herself, she almost could hear Shaw pause to roll her eyes.

Root went back to focusing on making lasagne, she didn’t hear the shower stop running nor did she hear Shaw come back into the living room.

So when she pulled it out of the oven she was pleasantly surprised to find Shaw in front of the fire place flicking through Root’s copy of Pride and Prejudice. Shaw was in one of her old Marine’s t-shirts and boyshorts, her wet hair was out and leaving wet stains on her shirt.   
She was happily reclining back against Bear who was soundly asleep. Root felt her heart as she stared at Shaw unable to look away. She felt the smile forming on her mouth the longer she looked at the two of them, so peacefully existing.

Shaw eventually glanced up from the pages of the book and caught Root staring at her, her eyes shifting quickly as she lowered the book and raised an eyebrow.

“That’s mine” Root said glancing at the book on Shaw’s chest.

“I know” Shaw replied. Root put the lasagne down on the counter, pulling off the stove mittens and coming over to Shaw.

“You’re very unknowingly distracting” Root said and sat on the edge of the coffee table looking at Shaw.

“I’m laying on the floor” Shaw said and Root smiled.

“In your underwear, beside a fairy lit christmas tree, reading Jane Austen” Root pointed out “You look so soft it makes me feel like I should be nice to you, but I really don’t want to be” Root said her voice was low and husky and Shaw just stared at her with dark eyes.

“I don’t want you to be nice” Shaw said and sat up off Bear, looking up at Root who stared back at her for a moment before slipping a hand around Shaw’s throat and giving it a gentle squeeze.

Shaw didn’t break eye contact as Root slipped off the coffee table and onto Shaw’s lap, straddling her legs and tipping her face up so that she could kiss her. Root kissed her hungrily, like an addiction that she wasn’t able to pull away from. Their lips crashing together as the freshly showered smell of Shaw filled her nose. Root opened her eyes to look at Shaw, letting their lips part for a brief moment, but her eye suddenly caught Harold’s wedding gift that was sitting under their tree still and she automatically got distracted.

“Sam,” Root said looking back at her “You know what we should do?”

“Tell me” Shaw said her hands running over Root’s back.

“We should open Harry’s present” Root said and Shaw just stared at her in confusion.

“What?”

“It’s been three months, and despite the whole getting shot thing…we still made it” Root said and smiled and Shaw just looked at her.

“Okay” she said slowly “That wasn’t exactly the kinky let’s have fantastic sex response I was geared for.”

Root kissed her lightly before climbing off her lap and reaching for Harold’s present.

“Do you want to open it?” Root asked excitedly running her hands over it.

“I _want_ you on top of me” Shaw said and Root glanced at her, knowing she was already more than a little worked up, her eyes were dark and lustily staring at Root, and her cheeks were flushed.

“Sam” Root said “Snap out of the honeymoon phase this is our first wedding gift!”

“We never had a honeymoon phase” Shaw frowned “We came back to New York and talked about divorce.”

“Well maybe we should consider a honeymoon then,” Root said raising an eyebrow and Shaw’s mouth opened but no words came out. Root slowly peeled back the wrapping paper and discarded it to the side, leaving both of them staring at a brown box.

“The suspense is unreal” Shaw said sarcastically leaned back, tipping her head backwards and letting Bear lick her face.

Root opened the box and gassed and Shaw looked back at her curiously as pulled from the box a black and steel block set of knives. Shaw lifted an eyebrow and felt a smirk stretch across her face as she pulled one of the knives out, feeling deeply satisfied at the sharp slicing sound it made as it left it’s socket.

“Are these for vegetables or bad guys?” Shaw asked running her finger very carefully along the blade.

“Hopefully bad guys” Root said her eyes glinting with excitement. Shaw put the knife back and then caught sight of something that was wedged into one of the slots where a smaller knife should be.

“Wait, what is this?” Shaw said wiggled it with her fingers before it dropped out and both her and Root looked at it confused.

“What’s this for?” Root asked picking up the key that had fallen between them, then suddenly she cocked her head to the side as The Machine said something in her ear. Root lurched across Shaw for a pen and started scribbling letters down on her arm.

“Why are we getting a number this late?” Shaw asked when Root was finished and studying the messy ink on her skin.

“I don’t think it’s a number, Sam” Root said shifting closer to Shaw so their legs were touching as she showed Shaw the numbers on her arm.

Shaw looked closely at the number, letting her thumb graze across Root’s skin lightly underneath the numbers.

“Coordinates” Shaw mumbled with a small frown. “Get your phone.”

Root reached behind Shaw and grabbed her phone off the couch quickly typing in the numbers and hitting search, she glanced at Shaw who was staring back at her.

“You don’t think…” Shaw started but they both looked back at the screen and looked at a street address that wasn’t far from where they were.

“Wanna go check it out?” Root asked and Shaw just nodded, getting to her feet and fetching the motorcycle helmets from the armchair near the door.

“I’m not saying you have to put pants on” Root said taking one of the helmets from Shaw “But you might get cold.”

Shaw glanced down at her briefs and rolled her eyes and disappeared into the bedroom, pulling some jeans on and grabbing one of Root’s leather jackets tugging it on as she followed Root out the door.

“That’s mine” Root said glancing at the jacket Shaw was wearing.

“I know” Shaw said and saw Root smirk.

Root tried not to break into a completely embarrassing grin as she watched Shaw pull on the helmet and climb onto the back of her motorcycle. She loved it when Shaw wore her clothes. She loved that they were always little too big, and that Shaw when given a choice would automatically choose something of Root’s over her own things. Root pulled on her leather gloves and helmet before climbing onto the bike.

She felt Shaw’s arms wrap around her waist, followed by the weight of Shaw’s body as she completely leaned into Root to keep warm. Affection was something Shaw hated and constantly self proclaimed that she wasn’t good at, but oh god, sometimes… sometimes she was fucking perfect at it. Root let her heart finish fluttering at the feeling of Shaw pressed into her back, before she started the engine.

It was a week before Christmas and so despite it being freezing cold outside and late at night there were still people flooding the streets. Root weaved in and out of traffic smoothly before turning off the main road onto a quiet street, coming to a stop outside a row of brownstones. They stayed sitting on the bike, pulling their helmets off and staring baffled at the building in front of them.

“Did you bring the key?” Shaw asked and Root held it up in front of Shaw’s face without a word. Shaw took the key and dismounted the bike glancing back at Root before going up the stairs taking two at a time then stopping outside the door. No one was home, all the lights were out.

Shaw stared at the lock before slipping the key in it and twisting. The lock clicked, she turned the handle and it swung open. Shaw looked back at Root who was still sitting on the bike. Root’s heart was beating fast in her chest as she watched the door open, and seeing the almost satisfied look on Shaw’s face made her heart leap completely.

“You didn’t tell me” Root said quietly to The Machine as she swung her leg off her bike and walked up to join Shaw.

“So the key worked” Shaw said staring at Root who looked at her, then the open door, then back at Shaw.

“I guess we have to go in?” Root said and Shaw turned back to the door, pushing it open a little more and going inside. The sound of her shoes echoed through the empty rooms. Stairs were to her left and big open archway led her into the room next to the hallway. Root followed her through and stopped in the middle, in front of the fireplace.

“He didn’t.” Shaw said and Root looked at her, slowly slipping her hand into Shaw’s and intwining their fingers.

“He did.” Root said. “This is ours.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 20???? Already????? How.  
> I'm enjoying this just as much as you though.   
> This one was a little more from Root's perspective just for a change.  
> Let me know what you think.... this marriage thing is, wow, moving along quite nicely.


	21. The Babysitters

“A brownstone, Harold, really?” were the first words to fly from Shaw’s mouth as they walked into Finch’s the next day.

Harold smiled and looked up from the screen at Shaw and Root. “I thought it was a bit more unassuming for two highly trained killers.”

“Is that what you thought?” Shaw said rolling her eyes and Root just smiled.

“We love it.” Root said still feeling giddy.

“I live with my wife and dog in a brownstone in Central Park West…” Shaw shook her head “What are you trying to do to me.”

“To some people Shaw that would be like winning the lottery, a few months ago you barely had a bed.”

“Are you part of that lottery?” Shaw shot her a look.

“Before this conversation goes any further” Harold said interrupting them “I’m afraid I’ve done something a little rash…”

“The brownstone isn’t what you call _rash_?” Shaw asked and Harold just looked at her with wide eyes.

“If you could both come with me” Harold said and something in his tone set both of them on edge, Shaw reached for her gun and Root frowned stepping towards Harold reaching for her taser.

“I would advise you strongly to leave all of your weapons here” Harold said and Shaw lifted an eyebrow.

“What is going on?” Root asked sliding her taser onto the desk slowly.

“Well” Harold said unable to find the right words, instead walking down the hallway and opening up the caged door to the library where a little girl sat swinging her legs at the table colouring a piece of paper with a red crayon.

Shaw came up behind Root and stopped abruptly in her tracks.

“Uh, what are we looking at, Harold?” she asked her voice low.

“This is Belle” Harold said and the little girl looked up at the sound of her name. Her hair was the same chocolatey colour as Root’s, and she had it tied up in two very high pigtails with pink bows. She looked at Harold with wide blue eyes before looking at Root and Shaw and frowning.

“You can’t _steal_ children, Harry” Root said unable to take her eyes off the little girl.

“Not stolen, protecting.” Harold said and Shaw looked at him waiting for an explanation.

“She’s our number?” Shaw asked eventually and Harold just nodded.

“I was hoping the two of you might be able to look after her, Mr Reese and I have some urgent business to take care of.”

“Harold” Shaw almost shouted.

“You can’t be serious.” Root said looking at him in disbelief.

“We’re not babysitting, Harold” Shaw said folding her arms across her chest.

“I’m afraid you don’t have a choice.” Harold said slowly backing away from the two of them.

Belle looked over at Root, putting her crayon down to give full attention to the glare she was shooting her. Shaw arched an eyebrow when she saw the look on Belle’s face directed at Root.

“On second thoughts…” Shaw said.

“We’re not doing this.” Root said spinning around to leave but Harold stood in her way.

“She’s five years old, she’s harmless” Harold reminded them. “Take her to the park, don’t give her too much sugar, you’ll be fine.”

Before they had a chance to protest Harold had disappeared, and they were left standing there in a staring competition with a little girl.

“She hates me” Root whispered and Shaw smirked.

“She needs to get in line” Shaw said and brushed past Root as she walked into the room and pulled up a chair in front of the kid.

“Are you Harry’s friend?” Belle asked as Shaw studied her delicate little features.

“I guess you could say that” Shaw said.

“Who’s she?” Belle asked and pointed at Root who was still hovering by the door.

“That’s Root.”

“Like a tree?” Belle asked looking at Shaw curiously.

“Exactly” Shaw said “She’s the root of all my problems.”

Root shot her a glare.

“Do you have a name?” Belle asked.

“Sameen.”

“Sammy are you a robot?” Belle asked tilting her head to the side staring at Shaw with big round blue eyes.

Shaw opened her mouth to reply then closed it again.

“Your turn” she said to Root and got up from the chair.

“You’re not going anywhere” Root said grabbing Shaw by the arm as she tried to walk away.

“Why?” Shaw asked looking her straight in the eyes “Are you scared of a tiny girl?”

“No.” Root demanded her jaw clenching. Shaw rolled her eyes.

“You totally are.”

“I’m not” Root frowned and glanced at Belle who was still watching their every move.

“Then go and talk to her” Shaw said but Root didn’t move.

Shaw sighed and turned around to face Belle.

“Do you like trees?” Shaw asked and Belle thought about her answer for a moment.

“On if they have ladybugs” she replied and Shaw almost cackled.

“Okay, let’s go.” Shaw said and tilted her head towards the door. Belle slid off the chair carefully and came skipping over to Shaw holding her hand out for her to take but Shaw just shook her head.

“Hold Root’s hand.”

“No” Belle frowned.

“That’s what I say too,” Shaw said and glanced at Root who just rolled her eyes.

“Why do you have to hold Root’s hand?” Belle asked as they walked towards the door. “You’re a grown up.”

“She’s my _wife_ ” Shaw still wanted to groan when she used the word but caught Root smiling any which way.

“Wife?” Belle echoed as Shaw pushed the door open out onto the sidewalk. “Are you a boy?”

“Does it matter?” Shaw asked keeping herself close to Belle as they walked down the street, Root hanging a step behind them.

“Boys are mean.” Belle said starting to skip again beside Shaw.

“You know what to do if a boy’s mean to you?” Shaw asked looking down at Belle in her pink dress, and purple and white striped tights. Belle shook her head.

“You aim between their legs and kick them hard as you can.” Shaw said and Belle’s eyes widened.

“Sam” Root growled from behind her and Shaw looked over her shoulder at Root with a smirk.

“What? She’s gotta learn.”

“Yes but”

“I can’t tell her to shoot them.” Shaw shrugged and turned back to Belle as they stopped to cross the road to central park.

“You have to hold my hand for this part, Sammy” Belle demanded. Shaw sighed and crouched down in front of the little girl.

“Root is really good at holding hands” Shaw said “It’s almost annoying how good she is.”

Root watched Shaw eye level in front of the little girl and felt her heart melting. Shaw dressed head to toe in black, and this tiny little human in bright pink and purple, with pigtails and bows who had somehow captured Shaw’s full attention.

“Root” Shaw said standing back up and snapping Root out of her daze. “Show Belle how good your hand holding is.”

Root lifted an eyebrow and reached for Shaw’s hand, her fingers grazing Shaw’s palm before Shaw batted her hand away.

“I meant _her_ you idiot” Shaw rolled her eyes and Belle giggled.

“She called you an idiot” Belle said and took Root’s hand without a second thought. Root almost gasped at the feeling of a tiny warm hand slipping into her own.

The cross signal flashed on and Belle skipped across the road tightly holding on to Root’s hand.

“Can we go to the playground?” she asked batting her lashes looking up at Root. “Pretty please?”

Root looked at Shaw and stuck her bottom lip out and Shaw smirked.

“Yeah kid” Shaw replied and Belle grinned letting go of Root’s hand and sprinting off ahead of them. Shaw stared at Root waiting for her to realise.

“Are you going to chase after her or do I have to?” Shaw asked and Root lifted an eyebrow before realising how far ahead Belle had gotten.

“Shit” Root swore as she took off running after Belle. Shaw just smirked in amusement and stuffed her hands into her jacket pockets as she walked after them.

*

“This is deeply exhausting” Root panted over an hour later collapsing down beside Shaw on a park bench while Belle kept running around the grass happily chasing after Bear.

“The dog is the only one who can keep up” Shaw said watching them both.

“I think they love each other” Root said looking away from Belle and Bear and towards Shaw, who’s eyes were still locked in front of them.

“Yeah, they do” Shaw said not noticing that Root was staring at her with those soft dark eyes. “He’s being so gentle” Shaw said tilting her head to the side watching them “It’s like he knows she’s just this fragile little thing.”

Root stared at Shaw in awe, she could feel her heart beating in her chest, thrumming through her body and veins.

“I love you” the words slipped from Root’s mouth and she was unable to catch them before Shaw heard them, turning around to look at Root she was almost taken back but how quickly and gently Root had said it.

“I know” Shaw said looking between Root’s eyes wondering where it had suddenly sprung from. But before they could get any further a voice interrupted them.

“You have a beautiful daughter” a woman said from behind them and they both quickly turned around to see a smiling mother with her baby watching them contently.

“Oh she’s not…” Shaw began but Root spoke over the top of her.

“Thank you” Root beamed and the woman just nodded before walking off and Shaw looked at Root incredulously.

“Thank you?” Shaw repeated.

“Why squash her happy little fantasy?” Root asked and looked back at Belle who tripped over Bear and fell onto the grass. Bear automatically looked at Root in shock, as Belle took a couple of seconds before bursting into tears.

Shaw spun around and sighed. “Looks like our _beautiful daughter_ is hurt.”

“I’ll get it” Root said standing up and dashing across the grass to where Belle was sitting.

Shaw watched from the bench as Root crouched down beside Belle with a concerned frown dipping between her brows. She watched as Root brushed Belle’s hair out of her face, and rubbed little circles on Belle’s back as she inspected Belle’s unscratched knee.

She watched as Root said something to her, and the way Belle looked up at Root with those big blue eyes and trembling pink lips. She watched as Root scooped Belle up into her arms and kissed her forehead, snapping her fingers on her free hand so Bear would stay close to her heel.

Root came back over to Shaw with Belle happily snuggled into her.

“I think she’s getting tired” Root said.

“I’m not” Belle protested with a sniffle.

Shaw looked at the time on her phone. “Any word from Harold?”

“Nothing” Root said and bit the corner of her lip. “Do you think we should take her back to…”

“The apartment?” Shaw asked.

“I was going to say the brownstone” Root said.

“There’s nothing there yet” Shaw frowned.

“I mean, we could stop and get some stuff…then make a fort” Root suggested and Belle’s face lit up.

“A pillow fort?” Belle asked.

“Great.” Shaw let out a deep sigh.

*

“Do you think he’s doing this to us on purpose?” Shaw asked two hours later when she found herself sitting in a pillow fort with Belle asleep between herself and Root.

“Why would he do that, Sameen?” Root asked looking over at her.

“The house, the child… do you think he’s getting some kind of amusement out of this?” Shaw asked staring down at Belle.

“Are you?”

“Significantly less funny than the time I had to put on a dress and spray perfume at upper east siders all day” Shaw frowned.

“But you looked hot” Root smirked.

“Too bad I was mad at you.” Shaw reminded her glancing over at Root, remembering that night she had come home and found her reading a bridal magazine on the floor with Bear.

“I don’t always need your _help_ , Sam” Root said a cheeky look appearing on her face and Shaw quirked an eyebrow.

“I haven’t forgotten about your little kitchen counter routine” Shaw mentioned and Root smiled.

“I knew you enjoyed that” Root said with a smirk “Maybe we could put this fort to use when sleeping beauty is gone.”

“Root” Shaw said cocking her head to the side a little, “I am dealing with the majority of this domestic bullshit that somehow I have been launched into like a misfired grenade, but having sex in a fort with you is really pushing that line.”

“The fort is pushing the line?” Root was almost smiling as she arched an eyebrow looking at Shaw. “Not the house or the living together… but the fort?”

“I will leave.” Shaw said glaring at her.

“Will you just?” Root tested her. Shaw stared at her for a few seconds before lurching forward and crawling out of the fort into the empty living area. Root reached out and grabbed her ankle causing her to slip onto her stomach with a thud.

“Unhand me” Shaw growled.

“No” Root said and Shaw didn’t have to turn around to know she was smiling.

“You’re gonna the wake the kid, and considering I’m leaving you’re then going to have to deal with that.” Shaw pointed out but Root didn’t let go of her. “I’ll kick you.”

“No you won’t” Root said and Shaw jerked her leg just enough for it to make Root flinch and she quickly pulled her foot out of Root’s grip.

“You’re _so_ annoying” Shaw groaned as she moved away from the fort and stared back in at Root from a safe distance.

“And you’re not leaving” Root said with a satisfied grin.

“Watch me” Shaw said.

“Okay, then I can check out your ass” Root smirked and Shaw glared at her again.

“What happened to nothing is going to change even though we’re married?” Shaw asked as she tugged on her jacket.

“I think you should ask yourself that Sam, because I’ve been pretty consistent” Root shrugged and Shaw just frowned. “Maybe it’s that big heart of yours.”

“Ha, ha” Shaw shook her head as she walked towards the door, but as soon as she pulled it open she was face to face with Reese.

“What the hell?” Shaw frowned and Reese just stared at her.

“Harold’s gonna take the kid tonight” Reese said and glanced inside seeing Root in the fort and lifting an eyebrow.

“If you want to keep your limbs attached I wouldn’t comment on that” Shaw said folding her arms.

“I can’t unsee that” Reese said and looked back at Shaw.

“I could poke your eyes out” Shaw suggested and Reese smirked.

“I can’t believe you’re _married_ ” Reese said and almost chuckled, Shaw just glared at him.

“You’re just asking for me to hurt you” Shaw said.

“You have a house, and a wife sitting in a fort in your living room with a child…all that’s missing is…” and as if right on cue Bear came running out of the kitchen towards Shaw.

“Happy family?” Reese said looking at Shaw who aggressively rolled her eyes.

“Root, John is taking Belle” she called over her shoulder. “You have five seconds.”

Root appeared behind Shaw more than five seconds later, with Belle still sleeping in her arms.

“Hey John” she smiled as she passed over the little girl into his arms.

“Sure you don’t want to keep her?” Reese practically smirked.

“Tempting” Root replied before Shaw could open her mouth, “but it would ruin our sex life.”

Shaw couldn’t help but roll her eyes again at Root’s comment, grabbing the door and swinging it shut in Reese’s face before he could reply.

“I don’t know who I’m going to murder first” Shaw said and turned to Root.

“What did I do?” Root asked innocently.

“Everything” Shaw said. “And then some.”

Shaw stalked back into the living room and Root just stared after her.

“Where are you going?”

“Away from you.” Shaw snapped and Root just smirked.

“I love it when you get worked up like this.”

“Root” Shaw growled from the kitchen.

“What?” Root smiled “You can handle a gun fight but you can’t handle a little domesticity, it’s adorable.”

Root followed Shaw into the empty kitchen and found her sitting on the kitchen counter staring out the window. Root walked over to her and pulled herself up onto the counter next to Shaw.

“We can stay in the apartment as long as you want” Root said not taking her eyes off Shaw. “Does it freak you out?”

“No” Shaw answered eventually and looked at Root.

“So what is it?”

Shaw sighed softly. “Kind of reminds me of when I was a kid.”

“Oh” Root said quietly.

“My mom built me a fort once” Shaw said staring absentmindedly at the floor. “I lay in there for hours, doing nothing, just staring at the checks on the blanket… and she came to check on me when it was late, I remember she told me to go bed but I just lay there, and eventually we both just fell asleep in the fort.”

Root listened, her eyes watching Shaw, gazing at her softly. It was the only time Shaw had ever opened up to her about her past, Root never expected it from Shaw. They had a unspoken agreement that their pasts would do perfectly fine staying where they were. They never talked about their childhood, about their parents or what they were like as kids. It didn’t stop Root from wondering about little Sameen, but she would never ask. Then this. Suddenly. Seeing Shaw talk about her mother, there was a visible change in her voice, still bordering monotone, but there was something behind it, something thick and trapped. The story stripped of any emotion. She looked at Shaw who was still staring vacantly at the floorboards.

“I wish I could have known her” Root said softly after a few beats of silence fell around them.

“Yeah” Shaw replied “Me too.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Now this was a gigantic update for you!!!  
> I'm such a sucker for some Shoot fluff ugh you can't stop me.... and I know you won't ;)  
> Thoughts? Feelings?  
> Thank you for your endless support it truly means so much xx


	22. That Blonde Bitch

“What are you doing?” Shaw mumbled sleepily feeling Root rolling out of bed next to her muttering something under her breath.

“Shh” Root said softly “Go back to sleep.”

Shaw opened her eyes and rolled over so she was looking at Root in the dark, just a small amount of light seeping through the blinds on the window.

“Where are you going?” Shaw asked her hand running across the empty space next to her that was still warm from Root’s body.

“She needs me to prep for a number” Root said moving around the room in the dark.

“Now?” Shaw mumbled rubbing her eyes.

“She hasn’t told me what this is about yet but it must be something big if John isn’t handling it” Root said mainly to herself.

Shaw sighed her eyes trying to shut again. “Vigilance?” she asked.

“I don’t know, Sam” Root said and opened the bedroom door “Go back to sleep.”

Root shut the door behind her and Shaw stared up at the ceiling in the darkness. She struggled against wanting to go back to sleep, and after a few minutes she pulled herself out of bed and followed Root into the living room where she was sitting on the floor with her laptop.

“It’s five in the morning,” Shaw said looking over Root’s shoulder at her laptop screen and seeing an image of a blonde woman next to a profile.

“She seems to think that this woman has information we need” Root said with a frown.

“Information such as why anyone would get out of bed at 5am in winter?” Shaw asked and Root looked back at her with a cute smile.

“You didn’t have to” Root said and Shaw frowned.

“You made the bed cold.”

“Aww baby” Root said with an adorable pout and tapped Shaw on the end of the nose before turning back to the screen.

“Martine Rousseau” Root said “If I can get her to tell me who she works for, then maybe we’ll have a better chance of figuring what She’s up against.”

“And how are you going to get her to tell you?” Shaw asked.

“We’re going on a date” Root said and Shaw took a step back.

“You what?” she asked.

“ _Her_ idea, not mine” Root shrugged and Shaw just stared at her.

“No.” Shaw said and Root turned around again to look at Shaw, sleepily standing behind her in nothing but a t-shirt, her hair dishevelled and eyes tired.

“Sam, she could be the key” Root said.

“Then taser her” Shaw folded her arms.

“She thinks this is our best chance, if I…tread carefully” Root said still looking at Shaw who was burdened with a heavy frown.

“Are you gonna kiss her?” Shaw asked jealousy tinging the tone of her voice. “Take her back to the brownstone?”

Root rolled her eyes. “Go back to bed, you’re so cranky when you haven’t had coffee… or enough sleep.”

“Or maybe when the woman that took vows in front of me is heading off on some date with a blonde bitch” Shaw said and Root just smirked.

“Is that what it is?” Root grinned “You feel threatened?”

“Um no” Shaw said defensively “But do I support and enjoy the idea of you sipping mojitos with… her” Shaw said gesturing at Root’s screen “Not really.”

Root couldn’t help but smile, putting her laptop on the coffee table and getting up to come over to Shaw.

“Stop it” Root said cutely, tucking Shaw’s hair behind her ears and kissing the end of her nose, then her lips, twice, despite Shaw refusing to break. She tugged at Shaw’s arms until they unfolded then took her by the hands and dragged her back into the bedroom. Root climbed back onto the bed and lay down patting the spot next to her and waiting for Shaw to follow.

“Someone’s grumpy” Root said when Shaw lay back down finally, folding her arms across her chest and staring up at the ceiling with a stony look on her face, refusing to look at Root.

Root bit back the smile creeping onto her face and rolled on top of Shaw, straddling her, then sitting up. Shaw still refused to make eye contact, her arms staunchly folded.

“Come on” Root said softly slipping her hands underneath Shaw’s shirt and running them over her stomach. “You really don’t think anything is going to happen, right?”

Shaw glanced at her briefly, Root kept running her hands over Shaw’s sides as she leaned down closing the gap between their bodies and faces.

“Not when I have this” Root whispered kissing Shaw’s folded arms. “This is all I ever want.”

Shaw glared at her. “ _Martine_ is kind of pretty.”

“Yeah, so?” Root said rocking on Shaw’s hips a little bit. She unfolded Shaw’s arms and intwined their fingers before pinning her hands up by her head. “You’re my wife, and that is just my job” Root said leaning down so their lips were inches apart. “Did I also mention you’re really beautiful?”

Shaw frowned looking at Root, unable to move or protest from Root being on top of her and having her firmly pinned down.

“We can have really great sex when I get back,” Root tried and Shaw just looked away. “We could have really great sex now?”

“Martine needs your attention.” Shaw said and looked back at Root who just sighed.

“I will spend as long as it takes making it up to you” Root said and kissed her lips, catching Shaw’s bottom lip between her teeth and biting it lightly before letting it go.

“It might take a while” Shaw said and Root slowly kissed the corner of Shaw’s mouth, then her lips, then her nose and forehead.

“I’m counting on it” Root said softly before climbing off Shaw and disappearing back into the living room.

Despite being mildly annoyed it didn’t take long for Shaw to fall asleep again. But when she woke up, Root was gone.

Shaw found a post it note stuck to her coffee cup in Root’s scrawled handwriting.

‘I love you xxxx’

*

“What is this?” Shaw yelled ducking behind a car to avoid being hit by the open fire that was taking place in a parking garage the next day.

“How did they even find us?” Reese growled into his earpiece waiting for an explanation from Harold.

“I don’t know Mr Reese.” Harold’s voice came eventually as Reese reloaded his gun. “Clearly someone else is unhappy with The Machine.”

Shaw fired another round, making a decent dent in the amount of men who were left standing with loaded guns, she quickly ducked back down again to reload, then suddenly Root’s voice was in her ear.

“Hey sweetie” Root said “You busy?”

“Just a little” Shaw growled. “What is it, Root?”

“Sorry about the little party I sent your way” Root said sounding absolutely unapologetic.

“This was you?” Shaw practically yelled as Reese shot off another round beside her.

“I knew you and John could handle it” Root said sweetly and Shaw rolled her eyes. “I couldn’t have them disturbing my …time with Martine”

“Oh great” Shaw frowned taking a couple of shots across the bonnet of the car. “How did that go?”

“Well” Root said “I’ve been kidnapped.”

“What?”

“And I’m gonna have to go in three…two…” the line cut off and Shaw gaped in shock as she stared at her gun.

“What the fuck” she muttered tapping at her earpiece. “Harold” she yelled.

“What is it Sameen?”

“Root’s been kidnapped by that goddamn blonde bitch, trace her, now” Shaw said picking up the biggest gun she and Reese had with them and shooting off all the last rounds, but it wasn’t enough to take them all out.

“I’m out” Reese said and looked at her.

“Yup.” Shaw replied. “You ready?”

Reese just smirked as they both jumped to their feet and sprinted towards the next row of cars, dodging bullet after bullet that were being fired at them without stopping.

Diving behind a Range Rover Shaw tried to get hold of Root again but only received a static noise.

“Find her yet Harold?” she asked Finch instead.

“Not yet” he replied and she clenched her jaw.

“I mean at least she told you this time” Reese said from beside her and Shaw rolled her eyes.

“I’ll make sure to congratulate her on the communication skills if I get to her before she’s dead.” Shaw said sarcastically as they geared up to run again.

“I don’t know why you let your _wife_ go on a date anyway” Reese said and Shaw scowled at him as they ducked behind more cars.

“As if I had a choice” Shaw muttered and they went to run again, but misjudged the amount of time it would take the assholes to reload, moving a second too late and John grunted taking a step back as a bullet got him in the shoulder.

“We need to get a gun” Shaw said eyeing up one of the guns that had fallen out of the hands of the nearest guy that Reese had shot down.

Reese didn’t protest and Shaw suddenly made a move for it, dashing out from behind the car and charging towards the gun, sliding onto her knees to pick it up she shot two guys left, but not before one of them shot off another round, missing her with every bullet, except one. One bullet, that hit her straight in the thigh.

“Fuck” she growled as pain rippled through her leg.

“I’ve found her” Harold’s voice said in her ear and suddenly she forgot about her aching fiery hot bullet wound. “The Machine told me her last location, but can’t seem to see exactly where she is now.”

“How is that possible with her implant?” Shaw frowned.

“Do you really want me to answer that?” Harold asked then paused as he heard Shaw’s ragged breathing. “Are you and Mr Reese okay?”

“Couple of holes but we’re fine” Shaw said “What’s the address, we’re going to find her.”

“Sameen” Harold frowned and Shaw rolled her eyes, dragging herself to her feet and limping over to where Reese was trying to nurse his bleeding shoulder. “I highly advice you get medical attention before you try and find…”

“Harold, there’s no time.” Shaw cut him off and looked at Reese. “You ready?”

“Good as new” Reese said and glanced at Shaw’s bleeding thigh. “That needs to be tied though.”

Shaw rolled her eyes and tore off a part of her t-shirt. “Everyone’s a critic today” she muttered and tied the piece of fabric around her thigh tightly to stop the bleeding.

*

“This is where The Machine lost her?” Shaw said getting out of the car and staring at the empty road ahead of them.

“It’s the exact coordinates Harold gave us” Reese said looking down at his phone.

“How is that possible?” Shaw frowned “Unless…”

“Unless the implant was removed or she’s unconscious?” Reese finished for her and Shaw just shot him a look.

“Martine must have heard her talking to me” Shaw said with a frown as she got back into the car and looked at the map on her phone.

’There’s a facility not far from where you are” Harold’s voice piped up in her ear “It says it’s run by Homeland Security, but something tells me that’s just a front for something much worse.”

“Is no one who they say they are these days?” Shaw asked and rolled her eyes as she started the engine up on their hijacked car.

Halfway down the open road she felt the white hot pain in her leg start to irritate her again. She shifted uncomfortably in her seat but kept her eyes focused on the road. Then Harold’s voice piped up in her ear.

“You’ve lost too much blood, Sameen” he said soundly deeply concerned. “She’s calculated your chances in your current state and they’re not looking good.”

“I’m taking whatever chance I have, Harold” Shaw said and glanced over at Reese who was leaning back against the seat with a bloodied hand pressed to his shoulder.

“And if you both die before you get to Ms Groves, what good is that?” Harold asked and Shaw clenched her jaw in frustration, she knew he was right. But she couldn’t turn around and leave Root in the hands of some psychotic blonde.

“Then at least we tried.” Shaw said through gritted teeth and she heard Harold sigh.

“I’m begging you” Harold said after a few seconds. “You will not make it.”

Shaw hit the break hard and both her and Reese were slammed forward, caught by their safety belts. Shaw tightened her grip on the wheel as she stared at the road ahead of them. Harold stayed silent hearing the engine cut out. Reese looked over at Shaw.

“What would Root tell you to do?” he asked and Shaw looked at him before staring down at her wound.

“What she’d tell me to do and what she’d do are two very different things.” Shaw said.

She could feel she had lost a lot of blood, her head was beginning to feel light and her tiny little spots were appearing in her vision. She felt tired, but that wasn’t enough to stop her. Or was it. What would Root tell her to do? She knew the answer without even needing to think about it. Root would tell her to turn back. She could almost hear Root’s voice telling her to go back, stitch herself up.

Shaw let out an angry sigh as she turned the key in the engine, pulling the wheel all away round and pressing down on the accelerator hard. Taking them back the way they had just come. Shaw tried not to think about Root, whatever might be happening to her, and tried to remind herself that as ridiculously cute and soft Root was, that didn’t mean she wasn’t strong. She had been to hell and back. She would be fine, at least for a few more hours. She had to be.

It was Root, and Root was both annoying and impossible to get rid of easily.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We love them so …but never forget they are constantly being kidnapped, shot at, and tortured... problematic faves at their finest!  
> I have got to admit I only used Martine bcos i was too lazy to create another character, so this is a slightly different Martine from the show in terms of context but still I'm angry with her!  
> Let me know what you think!!!   
> P.S Is it just me or are these updates getting longer ;)


	23. Christmas Eve

Shaw drove back into New York without a single word to Reese. Pulling over a block before the hospital and turning to look at him.

“This is your stop” she said and waited for him to get out, but he looked at her in confusion.

“What about you?” he asked.

“I’m not going in” Shaw answered and Reese frowned.

“I have to go and get her, John” she said squeezing the wheel lightly.

“You don’t need to do it by yourself” Reese said but knew there was no convincing her otherwise.

“You don’t need to die too” Shaw said simply, “now get out or I’ll kick you out on your ass.”

Reese pushed open the door with his good arm and got out slowly, a tiny wince of pain at the movement shooting across his face before he slammed the door shut and looked in through the window.

“See you soon?” he said.

“Yeah” Shaw said pulled away from the curb.

Shaw drove for about ten minutes towards her old apartment. She knew it wasn’t hers anymore, but she highly doubted that anyone would have moved in let alone noticed that she was even gone. Getting out of her car she wandered inside, only catching a couple of strange glances at the blood that was caking her skin and the ripped piece of shirt around her leg. She aggressively tapped at the elevator button until it finally pinged open and she got in. Hitting level 4 and leaning back against the wall shutting her eyes momentarily as it shuddered to life and dragged her up the few floors that she would normally just bound up the stairs to.

Pushing open her apartment door she took a brief second to look around at the abandoned dark place, wondering for a split second how this was ever enough for her. Her breathing was ragged as she grabbed the medical kit from her bathroom and limped back out of her apartment, summoning the elevator and letting it take her at snails pace down to the basement.

The basement was dimly lit, one half broken fluorescent light illuminating the crappy junk yard that was down there. She went over to the fridge and pulled it open, no one was ever down here. And no one had found her blood supply. Usually she would just hook herself up to another human when she needed blood, but right now she didn’t have one of them at her disposal, so this would have to do. Ripping open the medical kit she prepped the needle and tube before flicking herself in the arm a couple of times, finding the vein and sticking the needle into her forearm, watching the blood flow from the blood bag up the tube and into her arm. 

Using her free hand and teeth she undid the knot that was holding the fabric together around her leg. As soon as the pressure was released it began to hurt more. She eased her jeans off biting down hard on her bottom lip, trying not to move the needle that was pushing blood back into her body.

“Goddamn it, Root” she growled sitting back down and using tweezers to retrieve the bullet out from inside her thigh, every muscle tensing, her jaw clenched, she could feel her heart beating, the sweat beading on her forehead. She dropped the bullet onto the floor, and put the tweezers down. Letting her eyes shut for a spilt second as she took a few heavy breaths before getting a needle ready to stitch up the wound. She still had a bandage on her hand from the bullet wound there, but it was healed enough so that the pain was barely noticeable, at least in comparison to this.

As she thread the needle through her leg she wondered what it would be like to have a job where she didn’t get shot so often, before realising that would be a job that she has no interest in. Where would the fun be.

Searching through the medical kit for a gauze she suddenly stopped and looked up.

“Shit” she muttered as the realisation dawned on her that she still hadn’t gotten Root a christmas present, and it was in fact, Christmas Eve. She looked back at the medical kit and frowned. She was out of gauzes.

She let out a groan as she got to her feet, she threw another blood bag into the medical kit and grabbed a round of duct tape off the shelf, finding some towels in the cupboard, she ripped one up until it was about the size of a gauze and stuck it down with duct tape across her stitched wound, before pulling on her bloodied jeans with the bullet hole in the leg. Grabbing the med kit, an arm load of extra towels and then traipsing back out to the car.

“Reese” she said tapping her earpiece as she started the car.

“You okay?” Reese asked immediately.

“I haven’t gotten Root a christmas present” she said.

Reese paused for a moment. “Well what does she like?”

Kinky sex. Shaw thought. “Uh, guns, dogs and shiny things.”

“There you go then.” Reese said.

“We have a cabinet of artillery at home already” Shaw said “And Bear likes being an only child, which only leaves…”

“Shiny things.” Reese filled in for her. “What about like a really disgusting infinity necklace or a r-“

“Ring” Shaw butted in. “Dude, yes.” She said before hanging up on him. Both of them had stopped wearing their wedding rings after a month since they realised that they had probably be less than fifty dollars and that the “silver” was starting to leave copper marks on their skin.

“I’m coming Root” Shaw said under her breath. “Just gotta make a pit stop first.”

*

Shaw drove up to the facility where Harold had said Root had been taken to. There was security before she could get through the gate. Squinting a little closer she could see a amateur looking guy in the booth who had obviously been lumped onto the night shift. It was just starting to get dark, she hoped security would be less at night, not because she wasn’t ready for a fight, but nursing a fresh leg wound at the same time wasn’t ideal.

She rolled the window down as she approached the security block and the young guy stuck his head out the window frowning.

“Hey man” Shaw said with a smile and he just looked confused. “You look kinda tired, think you need a nap.” Shaw said lifting up the gun she had beside her and shooting him in the chest. Getting out of the car she slipped into the booth and looked at the kid she had just taken out who was unconscious on the floor, pulling his security jacket and hat off him and putting them on. She looked at the monitor which was showing several different camera feeds, guards everywhere.

“Great” she murmured, taking his radio off his belt, opening the gate and then getting back into the car. She drove towards the building and parked outside next to an SUV. She tucked a gun in the back of her jeans as she got out of the car, slinging the bigger one over her shoulder and taking the medical kit with her just in case.

She easily took out three unprepared guards on her way into the building, stepping over them and swiping her way through severals doors with their key cards.

It was a strange building, something between an construction site and a research lab. Either way Shaw didn’t care. She threw open the next door and was suddenly face to face with five guards who looked at her and immediately recognised an imposter.

Swinging the gun round from her shoulder she took two of them out before they could unholster their weapons. Number three went down just as quickly. Then she needed to reload, she knew she didn’t have time so she stepped towards number four and whacked him across the temple with the gun. Swinging back around and catching number five in the stomach, winding him, but it wasn’t enough to take him out, he tried to grab the gun off her, struggling to keep his grip on it he pushed it back trying to get it out of her hands and caught her across the nose and mouth.

Immediately she could taste blood.

Feeling a wave of anger rush through her she let go of the gun and kicked him between the legs, but before he fell to the ground he grabbed her around the waist from where he was half hunched over and tried to tackle her. Shaw kept her balance and kneed him in the gut, he grunted and she pulled the gun from her jeans and smacked him down on the back of the head with it. Shaking him off her she picked up the medical kit, and walked through the next door.

It was a big unfinished room that she found herself in, it smelt like sweat and must. Then she heard a scream. It filled the room, bouncing off the walls, echoing.

Root.

She felt her heartbeat quicken as adrenaline pumped through her veins.

Then she saw it, right as a guard stepped in front of her. She saw the cage on the other side of the room.

“I’ll give you one chance to get out of my way” Shaw said looking back at the guy in front of her. “Oh look at that, it expired.” she said and swung a punch at him, but he blocked it and caught her in the gut with his fist. She grunted and fell in half, not realising how exhausted her body was. She grabbed him around the waist and kneed him three times in the groin until he fell in front of her. She lifted her gun and shot him in the chest.

She stepped over him and walked over to the cage. Another ear shattering scream filling the room. It wasn’t a scream of terror as much as it was pain and anger. She jaw clenched and her hand gripped the trigger of the gun hard.

A blonde woman stood in the cage with Root. She turned around at the sound of footsteps and smiled. _The bitch,_ Shaw thought and cracked her neck to the side, half staggering over to the cage, the taste of blood in her mouth, and dried blood between her nose and lip, her leg was hurting again, it wasn’t bad. But it wasn’t good.

“Someone call a medic?” Shaw asked dropping the medical kit and grabbing the cage with both hands, gun still in one.

“You must be Sameen” Martine said her blonde hair perfectly pulled back from her face, a stony look in her eye as she smiled. Shaw ignored her and looked at Root, who was zip tied to a chair, sweat slicked skin, her head hanging down to her knees, blood dripping from behind her ear.

“You don’t quite look like the knight and shining armour she described” Martine said tilting her head to the side looking at Shaw who was covered in blood and ripped bandages.

“Don’t need to be shiny to still kick your ass” Shaw said with a slight smirk and looked back at Root who still hadn’t looked up at her. She could see Root breathing heavily and a frown twitched between her eyes.

Martine lost interest in Shaw within seconds turning back to Root and crouching down in front of her.

“Are you going to tell me now, or shall we give your little friend a show?” Martine asked and Root let out a loud growl. “Okay, if you insist.” Martine said in a sickly sweet tone, picking up a syringe and tapping at Root’s arm.

Shaw rattled the cage and desperately hunted around for the entrance, spying the lock on the other side and moving swiftly around to shoot it open.

She threw herself at Martine ripping the half empty syringe from Root’s arm, just as Root started to scream again. She pinned Martine to the floor, her forearm crushing the blonde’s windpipe.

“What is this?” Shaw hissed holding the syringe in front of Martine’s face, Martine just smiled.

“Tell me.” Shaw growled hearing Root thrashing behind her in the chair. Shaw almost couldn’t face herself to turn around.

“Oxycodone” Root growled from behind her, Shaw glanced over her shoulder at Root who’s head was back to hanging loosely between her shoulders.

“She wants to drown out the screaming that happens” Root said drowsily “When she injects the amphetamine.”

“Why?” Shaw asked leaning down on Martine’s throat even harder.

“A little bird told me she enjoyed this torture technique” Martine croaked from underneath Shaw. 

“You’re supposed to use a barbiturate” Shaw practically spat in her face.

“Oh we have been” Martine was still smiling and Shaw was just about ready to shoot it off her face. “But little miss was being a touch uncooperative in telling me where that little friend in her ear is, I’ve been threatening her life with an overdose.”

Martine glanced to the side and Shaw followed her eyes seeing a pile of discarded needles.

“What the fuck.” Shaw growled “That’s enough to put a horse down.”

Shaw threw the syringe to the side and put both her hands around Martine’s throat.

“You fucking crazy bitch” Shaw said throttling her as she tried to claw at Shaw’s face, finally a tiny amount of terror flashing across her eyes as she realised Shaw’s strength. Shaw pulled Martine forward before slamming her back down onto the concrete floor, the impact knocking her unconscious straight away.

Shaw got off Martine and wiped the blood off her cheek where Martine had slashed her with a nail. She crouched in front of Root pulling the knife from her boot and cutting off the zip ties.

Root was panting, covered in blood and sweat, her pupils were dilated from the drugs and she could barely focus on Shaw.

“This is what happens,” Shaw said to Root “when you go on dates after your _wife_ tells you not to.”

Root finally looked up at Shaw, she was barely with it, but enough to hear what Shaw said and managed a weak smile. Shaw stood up, kissing Root on the forehead as she retrieved the medical kit and pulled out a bandage wrapping it around Root’s arm where the needle marks were.

“You think you can stand up?” Shaw asked looking at Root who was still limply unmoving in the chair.

“Maybe” Root mumbled “Amphetamine, adrenaline.”

Shaw frowned. “How much have you had?”

“It’s okay.” Root said. Shaw stared at the needles, feeling her leg start throbbing, suddenly all the aches and injuries announcing their presence now that she was in less danger.

“Oxycodone” Shaw muttered, Root forced herself to look up at Shaw, barely able to hold her head up, it lolled back but she caught sight of the hole in Shaw’s jeans.

“You’re shot.”

“Taken care of.” Shaw said making a split second decision and reaching for the needle with oxycodone and stabbing it into her arm.

“What are you doing?” Root frowned.

Shaw looked over at Root and discarded the needle on the floor. “I was shot.”

Root almost smiled again and Shaw smirked picking up the syringe with amphetamine and staring at Root.

“Are you sure?”

“We need to get out of here,” Root said her voice breathy and uneven, Shaw crouched down, already feeling the slightly larger than usual dose of morphine flooding through her system brushing away the agonising pain.

Shaw lifted the needle to Root’s arm but then stopped.

“I can’t do it.” Shaw said and put the needle down and looking up at Root who frowned, she was drowsy and fighting to keep her eyes open, her pupils still completely dilated. Shaw looked at her and chewed her lip. Adrenaline, she thought to herself. Think. I could scare her… Shaw thought but realised that probably wouldn’t be very effective. Then it clicked.

“Dopamine.” she whispered. “Hey, Root.”

“Mhm?” Root replied blinking slowly.

“I have something for you” Shaw said with a smile turning up the corner’s of her mouth. Already it had Root’s attention, she looked at Shaw curiously.

“What is it?” she asked softly.

“Your christmas present” Shaw said with a smirk and Root’s eyes widened a little. Shaw slowly slid her fingers under Root’s wrist and gently pressed against her pulse point, knowing Root probably couldn’t feel it, or wouldn’t notice. She felt Root’s heart beating fast, she hoped it wasn’t all from the drugs.

“You got me a christmas present?” Root said with a sloppy smile.

“Of course I did.” Shaw said “I was gonna wait, but…considering this has been the worst Christmas Eve…well ever, you can have it now, if you want?”

Root just nodded and watched as Shaw reached into the security jacket pocket where she had stashed the present, and pulled out a small black ring box. Root’s eyes immediately widened as she saw the box and Shaw smiled holding it in front of her nose, feeling the box graze her lips.

“You sure you want it now?” Shaw asked and Root reached forward prying to box from Shaw’s fingers.

Shaw watched as Root turned the box over in her hands, glancing weakly at Shaw before using both her thumbs to slowly push the lid open. Shaw saw Root swallow hard when the box had opened, her eyes fixed on what was inside it.

Shaw stayed crouched in front of Root watching every expression cross her bloodied face.

“You like it?” Shaw asked resting the palms of her hands lightly on Root’s knees.

“Sam” Root said looking up from the box with a beaming smile. “It’s perfect.”

“I figured black diamonds were more our thing.” Shaw said with a shrug but quietly felt a rush of satisfaction that Root couldn’t stop smiling.

“Our thing?” Root said taking the black diamond wedding ring from the box and handing it to Shaw.

“You wanna do this here?” Shaw lifted an eyebrow and Root leaned forward so their faces were almost touching.

“There’s still a chance we could both die” Root said looking into Shaw’s eyes as Shaw took the ring from her. “Plus, only us right?”

“Only us” Shaw echoed and picked up Root’s hand, she looked at the ring she was holding and at Root’s long elegant fingers, before glancing back up at Root. “I told a lot of people in my past that I don’t do relationships, and now I have a dog, a brownstone, and a _wife_ …and I’m kinda hoping that never changes.” Shaw said as she slid the ring onto Root’s fingers. “I will also continue to keep showing up to fights unasked, but you are not allowed to go on anymore dates.” Shaw said and laced her fingers in with Root’s. She glanced up at Root who looked like she was about to start crying.

“I love you so much it hurts” Root said softly and Shaw just looked back at her.

“I know, but that could also be the drugs and torture.” Shaw offered and Root just smiled and leaned in to kiss Shaw’s lips lightly.

“You forgot one thing on that list…” Root said and Shaw pulled back lifting an eyebrow curiously.

“We’re not keeping that kid” Shaw frowned and Root pointed to her jacket on the ground, Shaw reached over and grabbed it.

“Left pocket” Root said and Shaw stuck her hand in pulling out a red and yellow car key, her eyes immediately widening and she stared at Root in shock.

“This is…”

“Your christmas present” Root said and bit her bottom lip. Shaw stared at her in disbelief, turning the Ferrari key around in her fingers as a smile began to stretch across her face.

“Root” Shaw said with a grin and Root just looked at her.

“You’re so pretty when you smile” Root said softly and Shaw got to her feet holding a hand out for Root and helping her up. Shaw put an arm around Root’s waist, taking most of her weight and helping her out of the cage. But then she stopped, turning back and lifting her gun so it was pointed at Martine’s body. She pulled the trigger.

Root didn’t say a word as they staggered across the room and out the exit door on the far side into the night.

“Dopamine” Shaw smirked as she helped Root into the nearest SUV and slid into the drivers seat.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have a 9 hour shift today so you're getting this one early ;) not to mention I didn't want to leave you on that cliffhanger for too long..  
> Enjoy! And let me know what you think! xx


	24. Oh Christmas

Root woke up in the bath. The light was on, the door was open, she had most but not all of her clothes on. There was a bucket next to the bath and several towels discarded on the floor, an open medical kit was sitting on the sink and blood stained pieces of fabric. She pulled herself so she was sitting up, feeling her head spinning she leaned back against the back of the bath. Her stomach churned. Then Shaw appeared in the doorway, she was in sweatpants and a black knitted sweater, holding a plate and fork happily munching on something.

Root stared at her confused, everything felt groggy in her head.

“Why am I in the bath?” Root asked her voice croaking as she talked.

“Oh this is awkward.” Shaw said coming in, kicking the seat of the toilet down with her foot and sitting on top of it. “We’re getting a divorce so you can’t sleep in the bed.”

Root just stared at the plate of potatoes Shaw was holding, then looked up so their eyes met.

“You’re a little shit” Root said and Shaw just smirked stuffing another potato into her mouth.

“How are you feeling?” Shaw asked through a mouthful. “You had a pretty rough night.”

Root frowned straining her mind to remember what exactly had happened, but everything seemed foggy.

“I don’t…I don’t remember” Root frowned and stared at Shaw for answers.

“Not surprising” Shaw said “You were barely conscious, it was a pretty minor drug withdrawal… there was a lot of sweat and groaning, and not in the fun way.”

Root shut her eyes and looked away as a brief memory washed through her mind and she quickly tried to block it. Suddenly remembering feeling Shaw’s hands rubbing circles on her back, pulling her hair out of her face and saying quiet words to her.

“Are you okay?” Root said looking back at Shaw remembering that she had been pretty seriously injured when they had left the facility.

“I’m alive” Shaw said with a nonchalant shrug.

“You were shot” Root frowned “Again.”

“I think the more upsetting part was that blonde bitch clawing my face with her tendrils” Shaw said and that made Root smile.

“Upsetting?” she echoed and Shaw nodded with a fake seriousness.

“Deeply wounding” Shaw said and Root rolled her eyes with a smile on her face.

“Can I have a potato?” she asked and Shaw lifted an eyebrow stabbing one with a fork and stretching out her arm.

“Do I have to eat them in the bath?” Root asked and Shaw stared at her.

“Oh you’re feeling adventurous now?” she asked.

Root started to pull herself up, feeling a little shaky but she climbed out of the bath determined to do it by herself. She glanced down at what she was wearing, undies, t-shirt, sweater. She glanced in the mirror seeing her almost normal looking face, aside from the scratch across her cheek and the dark rims under her eyes, she looked over at Shaw.

“Did I…”

“We had a shower” Shaw said looking up at Root from where she was still perched on the toilet. “Didn’t really think spending Christmas Day caked in blood and open wounds was the proper tradition”

“It’s Christmas Day” Root said and Shaw stood up planting a kiss on Root’s lips.

“Merry Christmas” Shaw said with a smirk before turning and walking back out of the bathroom.

“Sam” Root said following Shaw out of the bathroom, noticing that the fire was on, so were the lights on the tree and Bear, asleep on the mat. “I don’t think I ever said thank you… for coming to get me.”

Shaw just shrugged, getting a plate for Root and dishing up some food. “It’s in the job description” she said “Well not Harold’s, but the marriage one.”

Root just smiled “I’m kinda glad we didn’t change our vows.”

Shaw smirked and slid Root’s plate across the counter to her, where she sat down on one of the barstools and picked up a fork.

Root watched Shaw, unable to figure out how it was possible for her to love this woman any more. But she did. It had just happened, the smallest most insignificant act of kindness. And Root felt her heart beating faster as she looked at Shaw. Potatoes. Root almost rolled her eyes. She gave me potatoes and all I want to do is tell her I love her. Root bit her lip to keep the words in.

“What?” Shaw asked noticing the strange look on Root’s face.

“Nothing.”

“Not nothing.” Shaw said and Root felt a smile twitching on her mouth.

“It’s just, _you_ ” Root said unable to look away. “You’re everything.”

Shaw looked at her then smiled. She smiled. She didn’t roll her eyes or make a stupid joke. She simply smiled, almost unwillingly before looking away.

“Harold thinks we should take a break” Shaw said after a few moments.

“A break?” Root asked, “Is that even a thing for us?”

“He said if we run out of fingers counting our injuries we shouldn’t come in for a week” Shaw said with a small shrug and watched Root do the math then frown when she realised in fact, she had more injuries than she did fingers.

“What are we supposed to do?” Root asked.

“Stay in bed?” Shaw said arching an eyebrow.

“I think you’d go stir crazy and shoot me” Root said with a smile as she bit into a potato looking at Shaw.

“Probably right” Shaw admitted and Root smirked. “Holidays have never really been a pastime for me, I figured it was probably more your kinda thing”

Root quirked an eyebrow. “We could go to Moscow?” she said immediately and Shaw looked up with an amused smile.

“You want to go from somewhere cold, to somewhere even colder?” she asked.

“Oh you want to go somewhere that you can take your clothes off?” Root asked with a cheeky grin and Shaw rolled her eyes.

“You’d like that wouldn’t you” Shaw said and Root bit down on the corner of her lip.

“Maybe I have an idea” Root said with a sly smirk and Shaw just looked at her expectantly “I’m not gonna tell you.”

“I hate surprises” Shaw said.

“You like my christmas present.”

Shaw rolled her eyes “That’s different.”

“It’s not.” Root said with a grin and Shaw put down her fork, coming round to Root’s side of the counter rotating the barstool she was on so their knees bumped together.

“It’s not going to be fun for you if you drag me somewhere I don’t want to go.” Shaw said leaning closely into Root.

“Actually I think that would be very entertaining” Root said closing the gap between their faces so the end of their noses touched.

“I hate you” Shaw said and Root kissed her a second after she finished talking. Root’s lips ridiculously soft and slightly salty, Shaw couldn’t not kiss her back. Her hands finding their way onto Root’s thighs, as Root’s hands reached up to Shaw’s face, deepening the kiss. Their lips moving perfectly against each other, it was addictive kissing Shaw, Root thought. The way Shaw would part her lips against Root’s but wouldn’t kiss her, the way she would open those dark eyes the moment she took a breath, their faces still millimetres away from each other, just so she could look at Root. The way she could be so gentle, kissing the corners of Root’s mouth, then kiss her hard on the lips not breaking away until they couldn’t breathe. It was addictive. She wanted more. And more.

Then Shaw winced in pain and their lips broke apart as she looked down.

“What?” Root asked softly, her hand still cupping Shaw’s face.

“Nothing” Shaw said looking back up at her but they both knew she was lying.

“Is it your leg?” Root asked with a frown and Shaw barely moved her head but it was enough for Root to see the tiny nod of admittance. “Let me look.”

“I probably just need some more painkillers” Shaw said but Root had already got off the stool and was taking Shaw by the hand pulling her towards the fireplace.

“What are you doing?” Shaw asked and Root turned to face her.

“Take off your pants” she demanded and Shaw just stared at her for a brief moment before obliging. Pulling her sweats down and letting them drop at her ankles before stepping out of them, slowly with her injured leg trying not to let Root see her cringe as pain shot up her thigh.

“Lay down” Root said and Shaw tried not to roll her eyes as she lay on the rug in front of the fireplace feeling the warmth dance across her bare skin. Suddenly Root’s cold fingers were on her leg and she flinched at the sensation.

“Oh that looks sore” Root said frowning as she pulled the gauze off. “Who stitched this?”

“I did” Shaw said and lifted an eyebrow.

“It’s crooked” Root said and Shaw immediately sat up.

“What? No it’s…” her voice trailed off as she saw a slightly out of line stitch job on her thigh and frowned.

“What happened?” Root asked and Shaw couldn’t move her eyes off her leg.

“I turned around” Shaw said her lips barely moving as she spoke “When I was coming to get you, Harold said I wouldn’t make it.”

“So you badly stitched yourself up then came and got me anyway?” Root asked and Shaw eventually looked up at her.

“I wasn’t about to leave you” Shaw said and Root gave her a small smile.

“Can I ask you something without you getting mad?” Root asked.

“Saying that won’t stop me getting mad” Shaw said and Root bit her lip looking at Shaw’s leg.

“Did you leave a bit of shrapnel in there?” Root asked and Shaw frowned.

“No.”

“Are you sure?”

Shaw clenched her jaw staring at her leg.

“No.”

“Okay” Root said softly.

“I never, I was…” Shaw frowned in frustration and confusion, but Root just placed a hand over one of hers.

“You were distracted, that doesn’t mean you’re not a damn fine doctor every other time.” Root said but it wasn’t enough to shake Shaw’s frown.

“I’m not a doctor” Shaw said with a sigh and lay back down on the rug. Root stared at her for a moment before leaning forward on her hands and knees and hovering above Shaw’s face.

“You’re right” she said and Shaw just stared at her blankly “you’re a highly trained sociopathic former Marine killer, who just happened to be in med school for a bit so no you’re not a doctor, but you are a badass and that’s pretty damn close.”

Shaw just stared at her. “How do you do that?”

“Do what?” Root smiled and placed a kiss on Shaw’s forehead before she got up and went into the bathroom to get some surgical equipment.

Root returned moments later, her hair piled messily on top of her head, glasses perched on the end of her nose, black latex gloved hands carrying a medical kit with her.

She crouched back down in front of Shaw and raised an eyebrow.

“Do you want a sedative?” she asked and Shaw stared at her.

“You’ll do just fine” Shaw said.

Root rolled her eyes. “Sameen, this is going to hurt.”

“You’re getting a dose of lidocaine whether you want it or not” Root said and flicked the syringe with her finger.

“I don’t need anaesthesia, I’ve had worse pain” Shaw frowned and raised her arm reaching for the syringe Root was holding.

“And what will our neighbours think when they hear you screaming?” Root asked and Shaw frowned even more.

“When have we ever cared what the neighbours think?” she asked and Root just stared at her.

“You don’t even realise how many cakes I’ve had to bake and deliver to their doorsteps” Root said and Shaw just smirked.

“Really?”

“I got really good at icing apologies,” Root said nudging her glasses further up her nose and kept prepping the needle.

“Root” Shaw said and Root didn’t look away from what she was doing. “I really don’t want a numb leg.”

“You can’t be scared of a little lack of feeling, Sam” Root said before glancing over at her “That’s your area of expertise!”

Shaw just rolled her eyes. “C’mon please.”

Root looked at her and frowned seeing that she was being completely serious, and so she put down the syringe. “What’s going on?” She saw Shaw’s jaw tighten. When Shaw said nothing Root looked in the other direction.

“Remember that time you made nitrous oxide when I’d been shot in the stomach?” Root said looking back at Shaw with a smile.

“Laughing gas.” Shaw said almost smiling.

“We still have some of that” Root said and lifted an eyebrow and Shaw rolled her eyes.

“Fine” she agreed and Root got up returning seconds later with the tube and small tank, handing the end to Shaw.

“Should you even be operating, Doctor?” Shaw asked with an arched eyebrow and Root shot her a look. “You’ve been on drugs in the past twenty four hours.”

“Shut up and suck that tube.” Root said and Shaw put the end of the blue tube in her mouth and took a deep inhalation. She could feel it almost instantly, it wasn’t a huge difference to her body,but she could definitely feel it moving around inside her. Reliving pain. She took several more deep breaths, letting it fill her lungs. She got so distracted by it that she didn’t even feel Root remove her stitches. When she glanced down she saw her own blood on her leg and laughed.

A smile immediately appearing on Root’s concentrated face.

“You said this was gonna hurt” Shaw said with a grin taking another long breath from the tube. “Liar.”

“Do you want it to hurt?” Root asked with a smirk, not looking up from Shaw’s wound.

“Maybe” Shaw said feeling the nitrous oxide start making her head feel light.

“I could press a little harder” Root said moving one of her hands to Shaw’s other thigh, locating a bruise and pressing down on it hard until she felt Shaw flinch a little. “I guess it’s mine now.” Root said and looked at the bruise then back up at Shaw who just laughed.

“Do it again,” Shaw said with a wide smile and Root rolled her eyes trying to ignore how stupidly cute her wife was being.

“No” Root said and turned back to the bullet hole. “I’m trying to conduct surgery here, do you mind being less adorable?”

“You think I’m _adorable_?” Shaw asked unable to stop taking long breaths from the tube, to the point where her lips were starting to tingle.

“Sometimes” Root said using her finger to try and find the piece of shrapnel left in Shaw’s leg.

“Root” Shaw said a stupid smile still plastered on her face, Root had to force herself not to keep looking.

“Yeah Sam?” Root said as she felt her finger nudge what felt like a tiny piece of metal and she immediately reached for the forceps.

“What would it be like if we were teenagers?” Shaw asked and Root lifted an eyebrow as she glanced at Shaw.

“Is that really what you’re thinking about right now?” Root asked and Shaw just laughed.

“Nooo” Shaw said and Root smirked.

“You wanna know what I think?” Root asked and Shaw just nodded. “I think you would have had those” Root said and glanced at Shaw’s chest “And worn crop tanks and backwards Yankees caps, you would have beat up anyone who was mean to me or who even looked at me wrong, and me” Root said with a pause “Ripped jeans, oversized grey t-shirts, hair that was probably always falling over my eyes, glasses, probably really shy and deeply in love with you, even if you’d kiss me and never say anything.”

Shaw just stared at her and Root lifted an eyebrow.

“What?” she said. “You asked.”

Suddenly a smile spread across Shaw’s face and Root pretended like her heart didn’t skip a beat in her chest. “Keep going” Shaw said drowsily and Root watched her before continuing.

“Um… you would come over to my house after school even when I didn’t invite you, I’d probably be hacking banks or government corporations for fun, you’d probably get impatient with my nerd behaviour and eventually our make out sessions would lead to sex, it would be fun, nowhere near as good as it is now, but fun, and then you’d go before my parents got home. And sometimes on the weekend I’d go to your house, and see your family and want to hold your hand and wonder what it would be like to be married to you…” Root said and her voice trailed off as she looked back at Shaw who was still smiling, but it was more of a dreamy smile than it was amused.

Root glanced back at the stitches she’d redone on Shaw’s leg and almost smirked at the fact she had made them perfectly straight without even thinking. She opened a tube of antiseptic cream and smeared it across the wound before bandaging it up.

“It makes me angry” Shaw said as the smile faded off her face, she stared up at the ceiling. “There’s so many things I wish I could say to you.”

“You could say them anyway” Root said softly and Shaw looked at her.

“It’s not the same.”

“I know” Root said pulling off her gloves and helping Shaw sit up. “How do you feel now?”

“Um” Shaw said with a guilty smile “Like I had too much laughing gas.”

“Can you feel this?” Root asked running her fingers up Shaw’s thigh.

Shaw just nodded looking at Root, their faces close. “I can always feel you.”

Root swallowed, she knew Shaw didn’t mean it that way, or maybe she did. But the way it made Root feel was something else. Like fireworks on crack.

Shaw chose that exact moment to lean in and kiss Root. It was driven by hunger but came out so soft, Shaw kissing her with just enough pressure, Root could feel Shaw smiling against her lips and shut her eyes. It was strange, _feeling_ Shaw smile. Feeling a synthetic happiness on her lips, Shaw kissed her again, and again. And then Root kissed her back. Shaw’s lips parted letting Root kiss her top lip slowly, softly, before Shaw couldn’t take it and pressed their lips together, before stopping mid kiss a laugh escaping her throat.

Root sat back and stared at her in some kind of strange awe.

“I think I love you too much” she said letting the words fall from her lips, the smile was yet to fade from Shaw’s face as she stared back at Root, something almost twinkling behind her dark eyes.

“I don’t think that’s possible” Shaw said with a smile, letting her tongue cheekily slide between her teeth.

“I think it might be” Root said unable to stop staring at her, that smile, the eyes, the way she was looking back at Root, it was everything, her skin, the scratch on her cheek, her lips, her teeth, the shape of her nose. Root looked down and saw their fingers were loosely entwined.

“You know” Root said running her thumb over Shaw’s. “I think I’m glad you have a personality disorder.”

Shaw laughed and it filled the room and Root had to look back up to see it on Shaw’s face.

“Why?” Shaw said with amusement lacing her voice.

“I don’t think I could handle that smile” Root said the corners of her mouth twitching up. Shaw just raised both her eyebrows and grinned as wide as she could and Root rolled her eyes, but looked away all the same.

“Don’t” she said with a cute pout and Shaw put two fingers under Root’s chin and tipped her head back up so they were looking at each other. Root stared at Shaw who let out a single giggle before managing her nitrous oxide consumption down to just a single smile.

“I love you,” Shaw whispered softly wrangling in the laugh she had bubbling in her throat.

Root felt her heart flutter, she felt everything flutter at those three stupid little words that her high wife had barely managed to get out without dissolving into giggles.

“I know.” Root said simply unable to help the smile that had already formed on her lips. _I love you too_ she thought. _Too much._

*****

Shaw turned the tiny piece of shrapnel round and round in her fingers staring at it frustratedly.

“Is your leg feeling better now?” Root asked coming over bringing two mugs and handing one to Shaw.

“Yeah” Shaw said taking a sip without looking in the mug first, confusion crossing her face before she swallowed what was in her mouth. “This is not coffee.”

“It’s cocoa” Root smirked “It’s Christmas Day and you just had surgery, you don’t need caffeine.”

“I didn’t mind the surgery because my doctor was hot, but _this_ should be given to Belle, and Belle only.” Shaw said but didn’t make any attempt to thrust the mug back into Root’s possession.

Root looked at her with a strange look on her face that made Shaw narrow her eyes.

“What Root?”

“Do you think she’s having a good Christmas?” Root asked.

“Don’t” Shaw said and held back an eye roll.

“What?” Root frowned.

“She’s five, every Christmas is great when you’re five.” Shaw said.

“And now?” Root asked and Shaw smirked.

“Not bad.”

“It was kind of nice having her around” Root said and stared at the fire.

“You just complained the whole time.” Shaw frowned and Root smiled.

“That woman thought she was our daughter” Root said turning back to Shaw who tried to avoid answering by taking a long sip of the cocoa in her hands.

“Yeah, well she kinda looked like you weirdly” Shaw said when Root wouldn’t stop looking at her.

“But she acted like you, weirdly” Root said and Shaw rolled her eyes finally unable to help herself, she nudged Root with her foot.

“Stop it” Shaw said. “Look at us, I just had home surgery and you’ve still got a stupid amount of drugs in your system.”

“I know” Root said softly. “I know.”

“It sounds like a bad joke” Shaw said “What happens when a psychopath and a sociopath try and raise a child?”

Root just smirked “I guess we’ll never find out the punchline.”

Shaw rolled her eyes and went to get up but Root put a hand on her leg to stop her.

“Don’t even think about it.” Root said and Shaw frowned in confusion. “You never stop moving.”

“I’m like a shark” Shaw smirked and Root almost burst out laughing.

“You’re way too cute for that” Root said and Shaw rolled her eyes, Root got off the couch and emerged seconds later with a pair of crutches. “You wanna go anywhere, you gotta take these two with you.”

“That is _so_ unnecessary” Shaw glared at her and Root just shrugged. “I’m not using them.”

“You may think that, Sameen, but actually your are.”

“No” Shaw protested pulling herself up from the couch but before she could take a step Root had the crutches in front of her, blocking her path.

“Take them, or sit your ass back down.” Root said and Shaw just stared at her in disbelief.

“Why are you like this?” Shaw said shooting her a look as she snatched the crutches from Root’s hands and slip her arms into them.

“Because we’re married, muffin” Root smirked and Shaw glared at her, before whacking a crutch against Root’s leg to get her to move.

“Never call me that again.” Shaw said as she clomped her way into the kitchen, holding her shot leg out straight so it wouldn’t get bumped.

“What are you gonna do?” Root asked following her into the kitchen. “Chase me?”

Shaw stopped in her tracks and took a deep breath to try and rationalise her frustration.

“I could mow you over with my Ferrari and not feel any regret.” Shaw said through her teeth and Root smirked behind her.

“That may have been true once, but we both know that now it isn’t.” Root said coming up behind where Shaw was standing and letting her hands roam over Shaw’s hips.

“Root” Shaw growled but Root didn’t pay any attention, she moved Shaw’s hair to the side and kissed the back of her neck, lightly, her lips barely grazing against Shaw’s skin. Then she kissed her shoulder, her lips dangerously close to the base of Shaw’s neck, her hands running up Shaw’s arms, feeling her tensed muscles. Shaw shut her eyes, letting herself get lost in Root’s touch for a couple of moments before snapping out of it.

Her eyes opening she could feel her heart beating in her chest, thumping loudly. She went to stop Root again, press her crutch on top of Root’s foot to make her yelp. But she didn’t.

Root rested her chin on Shaw’s shoulder wrapping her arms around Shaw’s stomach.

“You’re not protesting” Root said quietly and kissed Shaw’s neck.

“Sex relieves pain” Shaw said with a smirk feeling Root’s lips on her neck still. “Even if _you are_ the pain in my ass.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So double posting wiped me out at being super ahead of the game and having plenty of ready to go chapters for you.... this one feels a little late, but that's because it's fresh out of the brain, and thankfully the weekend is near (so lots of writing can hopefully happen...)  
> I think about this story way too much damn it.
> 
> How did you find this chapter? kind of stupidly cute?
> 
> I tacked on a little bonus bit at the end....it's original finish was after Root says "I know." ....you're welcome x
> 
> Thank you for all your feedback, suggestions and lovely comments. They mean so much to me! If there's anything particular you want to see these two idiots get up to leave it down below ;)


	25. The Lives We Lead

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> inspired by a comment about Root dragging Shaw antiquing ;)

Shaw was still sleeping when Root climbed onto the bed the next morning. She sat on her knees and watched Shaw for a minute or two, she looked so peaceful when she was asleep, so soft. It was tempting to just lean in and pepper her exposed skin in kisses, but Root found it in herself to refrain for the time being.

Then Shaw’s eyes opened, and she looked directly at Root.

“Your eyes burning holes into my soul woman,” Shaw said sleepily and Root grinned.

“I was trying to figure out how to wake you up” Root said and Shaw shut her eyes again.

“I think an airhorn would be more subtle than your looming presence” Shaw groaned.

“That’s so sweet” Root said and Shaw rolled her eyes behind closed eyelids, “do you think it’s because we’re soul mates?”

Shaw opened her eyes again to stare at Root. “What?”

“Because you can just tell when I’m around” Root said and Shaw almost smirked.

“What did I say about subtlety like two seconds ago?”

Root smiled and leaned down to kiss Shaw lightly.

“Get up” Root said “We have things to do today.”

Shaw frowned as she pulled herself up, her leg still feeling sore.

“Like what? I thought we were off this week” she asked and Root just raised an eyebrow.

“We are, but we’re not just gonna sit around here all day” she said getting off the bed and sauntering out of the room. “Don’t forget your crutches” she called out.

Shaw groaned as she pulled herself out of bed and picked up the nearest pair of discarded jeans on the floor, staring at them in frustration when she realised the effort it would take to get them on.

When she finally managed to get herself dressed she walked towards the bedroom door, trying to ignore the pain shooting up her leg with every step she took.

“I’m not hearing those crutches.” Root called out from the living room and Shaw rolled her eyes as she reached for the crutches that were leaning against the wall and slid her arms into them. Hating the fact that as soon as she tried walking again the pain was immediately relieved from her leg.

“I am truly angry about this.” Shaw said as she made her way into the kitchen where Root was standing sipping a mug of coffee, another one waiting beside her in Shaw’s mug.

“It’ll heal faster the longer you stay off it” Root said with a shrug and handed Shaw her mug. Shaw leaned on of the crutches against the counter and took a sip of coffee, immediately feeling better.

“So” she said and looked at Root “What are you forcing me into doing?”

Root smirked “I’ve made a decision.”

“Oh good” Shaw replied sarcastically.

“We’re going to be normal people this week.” Root said and Shaw almost spat her coffee out.

“Why?”

“Because.” Root said and Shaw arched an eyebrow waiting for more.

“Because only having one functioning leg isn’t enough torture for me?” she asked and Root rolled her eyes.

“You’re so dramatic, Sameen.”

“Should I shoot you in the leg?” Shaw asked “See how you like it?”

“No” Root said “And you can’t anyway, we’re not allowed guns or any kind of weapon.”

Shaw’s eyes almost fell from her head as she stared at Root in shock.

“Even normal people have guns, Root” Shaw argued and Root just shook her head.

“No guns, no tasers, no zip ties, no highly skilled fighting.” Root said and Shaw glared at her.

“Is the milk bad in your coffee? What’s wrong with you?” Shaw asked incredulously.

“Sam” Root said stepping closer to her wife. “Considering we’re off duty this week, we’re not going to be in any danger, we don’t need guns.”

Shaw had hundreds of arguments lined up in her head but none of them seemed to make their way to her mouth in time. In fact none of them even bothered to. Root had a point. Not that she would admit it. She let out an annoyed sigh.

“Are you gonna take my car keys too?” Shaw asked and Root smirked.

“Oh I would never,” Root said leaning in and stealing a kiss from Shaw before she could protest. “I’ve locked our guns in the cabinet, we’re not opening those doors until we go back to work.” Root said and Shaw immediately looked over at their artillery cabinet and frowned seeing all her guns through the glass.

“You’ve gone insane” Shaw muttered.

“Irrelevant” Root said hearing her mumble, Shaw turned to her.

“You realise I have no clue what normal people do” she said and Root just smiled.

“Not much, in comparison to us” Root said and Shaw glared at her again as she finished her coffee and slammed her mug down on the bench.

“You’re pushing my anger levels” Shaw said.

“No I’m not” Root said softly and running her fingers up Shaw’s neck and kissing the corner of her mouth gently before brushing past her. “Let’s go.”

Shaw ignored the fact she immediately felt flustered at Root’s touch and spun around to look at the other woman. “And where are we going?”

*

“Are you trying to get yourself murdered?” Shaw asked as Root handed her the crutches as she got out of her black Ferrari.

“You’d kill me with your bare hands?” Root asked looking mildly impressed and turned on.

“If I have to” Shaw said rolling her eyes at the look on Root’s face. “I am _not_ going in there.”

“Sam, baby, we have an empty house” Root reminded her as Shaw purposefully dodged eye contact. “We’re going to need something to have sex on.”

“The floor is fine” Shaw almost hissed.

“Not when you’re injured” Root said and Shaw took a deep breath.

“Wounds heal.” Shaw said.

“Not fast enough” Root shot back and Shaw glared at her.

“Do you ever consider my opinion or is it just immediately disregarded?” Shaw asked and Root rolled her eyes.

“Of course I consider it Sameen” Root said and started walking towards the furniture store.

“Well that’s news.” Shaw said stubbornly refusing to follow her.

“Sam” Root said standing on the other side of the road and folding her arms across her chest when she turned around and realised Shaw was still by the car. “Don’t make me drag you.”

Shaw leaned on her crutches with a frown still plastered on her forehead.

“What do you want?” Root asked finally getting impatient when Shaw persistently remained stubborn. “I’ll let you be on top?” Root said throwing her hands up and Shaw smirked.

“No you won’t.”

“It was worth a shot” Root said ignoring the looks they were getting from a couple who had just exited the store. Shaw stared at her with an eyebrow arched and Root just sighed. “Please.” she said with the cutest little pout appearing on her face as she stuck out her bottom lip.

Shaw rolled her eyes. “That’s not going to work.”

“Sameen” Root said blinking several times as she looked away and Shaw frowned immediately.

“Are you going to fake cry to make me come furniture shopping with you?

Root just looked at her from across the car park and Shaw saw tears almost rimming her eyes. Letting out a defeated groan she crossed the road, by the time she got to Root there was nothing but a playful smirk on her face.

“I could damage you with these crutches” Shaw said as Root spun on her heel and walked through the doors with Shaw behind her.

“No doubt” Root said picking up a catalogue. “Are you more of a beige or eggshell white person?”

Shaw rolled her eyes but before she had a chance to answer and man appeared in front of them.

“Welcome to Antique Furniture,” he said with an annoyingly perky smile “My name is Kevin, can I assist you with anything?”

Both of them lifted an eyebrow.

“No.” Shaw said immediately but Root spoke at the same time.

“Yes” she said with a smile “We’re furnishing our brownstone.”

“A brownstone?” the excitement in Kevin’s voice was apparent. “Whereabouts?”

“Central Park West” Root almost said almost smirking watching his eyes grow wide.

“That’s very impressive” he said glancing at Shaw then at her crutches. “You’re…married?” he asked turning back to Root who held up her hand and waggled her black diamond at him watching his eyes grow even wider.

“Oh my…” he practically gasped “Those are…. very rare.”

Shaw felt her fingers start to ache as she death gripped her crutches as she strained not to roll her eyes at the conversation playing out in front of her.

“What can I say” Root shrugged “My wife has specific taste.”

Kevin looked at Shaw. “That being?”

“Black.” Shaw said bluntly. “Now if you’ll excuse us, we’re going to peruse your sturdier variety of tables.”

Root almost choked on her tongue as she held back a laugh as the realisation on Kevin’s face became apparent and he nodded several times before slowly taking a few steps back.

“Let me know if you need anything” he said and Shaw just winked at him.

“Don’t traumatise him” Root said grabbing her by the arm and leading her away. Shaw smirked.

“I just wanted him to think that you were the reason I’m on these things” Shaw said and waved a crutch.

“He probably thinks a lot of things now” Root said and Shaw looked at her with a cheeky smirk. But Root quickly unhanded her and came to a halt in front of a set of white painted arm chairs.

“These are vintage French bergeres” Root gasped and Shaw stared at the chairs in front of them.

“Since when do you know about antique furniture?” she asked but Root ignored her, enamoured by the chairs, running her fingers over the white painted wood. “Kevin!” she shouted suddenly and Shaw almost flinched in shock at the volume of her voice, as she stared straight past Shaw to Kevin who suddenly appeared beside her.

“We’ll take these” Root said and Kevin just nodded.

“Fantastic choice ma’am.” he said jotting something down on the clipboard in his arms. “Perfect for a brownstone.”

Shaw looked between them in disbelief. _Do normal people buy furniture this easily?_ She wondered.

The next hour didn’t get any easier for Shaw. Swinging herself around on the crutches she tried to pay attention to the endless words that were coming out of Root’s mouth. None of them even registered in her brain. She would nod. Root knew she was only half listening but kept talking anyway. Shaw didn’t care about the furniture, she didn’t care about colour palettes, but she did care about Root. So looking murderously bored was off the table.

She found most of her distraction during the hellish process in just watching Root. There was such a delicacy that was never withheld, she had no idea how it was even possible for someone like Root to exist. Someone who could shoot someone dead without second thought, but have the capacity to be so incredibly tender at the same time.

“Sam” Root said snapping her out of her daze. “What do you think?”

Shaw stared at Root, the way her hair was tucked behind one ear, her glasses sitting on top of her head.

“Isn’t it pretty?” Root asked.

“Yeah, beautiful.” Shaw said without moving her eyes off Root.

Root turned to her and quickly realised that Shaw wasn’t talking about the _armoire_.

“You were looking at me?” Root said her cheeks suddenly growing pink.

“Why would I not be?” Shaw asked.

“Pay attention” Root said hitting Shaw’s arm lightly trying to fein irritation at her wife, but the smile turning up the corner’s of her mouth making it impossible to appear even remotely annoyed.

“I am” Shaw said still looking at Root.

“You’re not” Root said glancing at Shaw so finally their eyes met. Shaw lifted an eyebrow playfully and Root just chewed on her bottom lip looking flustered.

“You’re just…” Root glanced over Shaw’s shoulder before looking back at her “You’re just making me want to touch you.”

“Tell me more” Shaw said leaning in on her crutches so her face was dangerously close to Root’s. Root’s lips were parted as she stared at Shaw words escaping both her brain and mouth.

“Sameen” she said her voice nothing more than a breath.

“About the wooden thing, we have here” Shaw added and turned her attention to the cabinet Root had been trying to show her, leaving Root standing a step behind her entirely flustered, feeling her heart racing in her chest.

“Maybe we should go bed shopping” Root said her eyes dark as she looked at Shaw.

“As long as it’s not antique,” Shaw smirked“I don’t think it could handle us.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ask and you shall receive! Let me know if you have any more suggestions for what these two should do with their free time ;)  
> I wasn't 100% about this chapter... but apparently I can't stand not updating daily....so again you're welcome! I hope you enjoy it!  
> Thank you for so many amazing comments on the last chapter.... I'm glad you like seeing the quieter moments between these two because there are more to come!  
> xx


	26. Good Wife, Bad Wife

“I’m impressed” Root said “Your face is doing a spectacular job of concealing how much pain you’re actually in.”

“It doesn’t hurt” Shaw lied through her teeth and Root just smirked to herself.

“Yeah Sam,” she said “It doesn’t hurt and you don’t care about me.”

Shaw glared at her. “It hurts a little.”

They were taking Bear for a walk late afternoon, the sky was completely white and it was lightly snowing. Root had spent half an hour insisting that Shaw should stay on the couch while she took Bear out, but after realising that she wouldn’t be leaving the apartment without Shaw she eventually gave in.

Shaw had a slightly limp as she walked, it was the first time she had abandoned her crutches in a few days, determined to suffice walking without one.

“You and Harry have matching limps” Root teased and Shaw elbowed her in the ribs.

“Ouch” Root giggled and Shaw glanced at her for a split second thinking she might have actually hurt the other woman. Snow lightly fallen onto Root’s beanie and was sitting lightly on the long strands of her hair, her nose and cheeks were light pink and she had that stupid smile on her face.

“You know I do notice,” Root said looking at Shaw.

“Notice what?”

“You looking at me.” Root said biting her lip and Shaw looked straight ahead.

“I’m not the only one guilty of staring” she said and Root smiled.

“I know” she said something ridiculously soft in her tone. “But I’m just not as used to it as I thought” she said and paused wondering if Shaw was going to say anything, but when she was met with silence she continued. “You used to just look at me with… endless frustration and annoyance.”

“And I don’t now?” Shaw smirked.

“Sometimes” Root said with a cute smile “but then there’s the other look.”

Shaw looked back over at Root dark eyes searching her face. “What look?”

Root stopped walking, Bear stopping too and sitting at her feet as Shaw turned towards her.

“That one.” Root said as Shaw tilted her head to the side wondering what exactly it was that Root was seeing. “You look like…you look like you love me.”

Shaw didn’t move her eyes off Root. She wasn’t taken back by those words.

“Maybe that’s because I do” Shaw said her lips barely moving as she followed Root’s dark eyes with her own.

Root watched her not knowing what to say, it was almost like she had been expecting a different answer. Shaw’s eyes searched her face wondering what she was thinking.

“Root?” Shaw said taking a step towards her the smallest frown carving it’s place on her forehead. “It still freaks me out when you go quiet like that.”

Root smiled and rolled her eyes, taking Shaw’s gloved hand in hers before she could protest and continuing to walk.

“You said it again,” Root said “when you were high on laughing gas, I told myself I wasn’t going to mention it to you because you probably wouldn’t…”

“I remember” Shaw interrupted and Root looked at her.

“You do?”

“I also remember you telling me you’re glad I’m a sociopath because my smile is too much for you” Shaw said almost smirking and Root purposefully banged their shoulders together as they walked.

“Hm, now that I don’t recall” Root said playfully and Shaw rolled her eyes.

“Well I guess that’s okay then” Shaw said “I won’t have to bite back my constant need to smile around you then.”

Root stared at her questioningly and Shaw glanced at her with a smile. A proper smile. An amused smile.

“Stop it.” Root demanded and made herself look away from Shaw. “You’re too damn pretty.”

“You’re such a sap” Shaw smirked, her next step sending an unpleasant jolt of pain through her leg. She stopped walking immediately, her hand falling from where it had been entwined with Root’s. Shaw growled pressing two fingers lightly to where the bandage was under her jeans.

“This thing is really testing my patience.”

“Well technically you shouldn’t be off crutches yet” Root said from a couple of steps away where she had stopped with Bear.

“Thank you for your unwanted opinion,” Shaw said straightening back up and taking another step but feeling that same jolt through her thigh. She couldn’t hide the wince of pain, her fists automatically balling up into the palms of her hands.

Root watched her with a frown. When Shaw tried to take another step Root quickly stepped in seeing another flinch of pain, Shaw’s eyes shutting briefly in frustration until she felt Root’s hands on her shoulders.

“Okay stop” Root said looking at her with concern. Shaw opened her eyes and frowned. “What’s your pain like 1-10?”

“Four,” Shaw said through gritted teeth.

“So like a six then?” Root said arching an eyebrow and Shaw just stared at her. “We have two options.”

“They are?” Shaw asked.

“Well I could steal a car, but considering we’re normal people this week I’m going to go ahead and eliminate that one.” Root said and Shaw frowned.

“What’s the other option?”

“You get on my back.” Root said deadly serious.

“No.” Shaw said immediately and Root smirked.

“Baby, what other choice do you have?” Root asked and Shaw just glared at her.

“Don’t baby me” Shaw said.

“Don’t be so stubborn.” Root shot back with a grin.

Shaw let out a frustrated groan and signalled for Root to turn around.

“I don’t even think you’re strong enough” Shaw said and Root smirked as she crouched down.

“Oh so now you’re underestimating me, Sameen” Root said. Shaw stared at Root’s back and rolled her eyes before climbing on, Root looped her arms around Shaw’s legs, being extra gentle with her injured thigh, but picked her up easily then stood there for a brief moment.

“What?” Shaw said.

“For someone so tiny, you’re really heavy” Root smirked, Shaw wrapped her arms around Root’s neck just a little too tightly, pressing her lips to Root’s good ear.

“Just walk.” she said quietly and Root let out a small laugh. “Anyway, it’s muscle.” Shaw said defensively as Root started walking hooking Bear’s leash onto Shaw’s foot.

“Or maybe it’s all the sarcasm” Root joked and Shaw rolled her eyes.

“It’s amazing how fast I can go from thinking you’re reasonably cute to wanting to murder you” Shaw said and Root smirked.

“Thankfully I’m too cute for you to murder” Root said and Shaw laughed.

“You might think that.”

“What’s the view like from up there, Sam?” Root said with a smirk and Shaw leant down to bite Root’s shoulder, which only made her smirk more.

“It’s kinda windy up this high” Shaw said with her lips against Root’s neck.

“You’re an asshole” Root said and Shaw nipped at her neck lightly.

“I know.” Shaw said before pulling herself forward and kissing Root’s cheek. “And you’re wife of the year.”

“Sameen” Root smiled dragging out her name. “I can’t even agree though, since you were the one who saved me from Martine.”

“That’s true” Shaw said “I’m wife of the century.”

“Don’t push it, blanket hog” Root smirked.

“Look I might be a blanket thief,” Shaw said “But I’ve discovered a new fault of yours.”

“Which is what?” Root said readjusting her arms on Shaw’s legs.

“You always eat more than your half of the dumplings” Shaw said and Root giggled.

“That’s my big fault?” she asked and Shaw nodded seriously.

“It’s not a great trait to have, Root.” Shaw said and Root grinned. “I thought hackers were meant to be good at maths.”

“I’m fantastic at math” Root pouted.

“Then why can’t you count that five are for you and five are for me?” Shaw asked.

“I like dumplings” Root protested.

“So do I” Shaw said moving her hands so they were resting on Root’s head knowing that it would eventually get annoying.

“You always eat my noodles though” Root said and Shaw rolled her eyes.

“That’s because you eat one of my dumplings.”

“What do you want me to do about it Sam?” Root asked trying to move her head so Shaw’s hands would get off it.

“Um, stop eating my dumplings” Shaw said bluntly.

“Get your hands off my head and I’ll consider it” Root said and Shaw smirked quickly moving her arms so they were draped over Root’s shoulders.

“I could drop you” Root said shaking her head. “It’s a long way to fall for you too.”

“Well then you’d have to give me all your dumplings to make up for being a bad wife, and the unnecessary short jokes.” Shaw smirked and Root just groaned.

*

Shaw woke up to a jolt in the bed next to her, followed by a muffled groan. She assumed it was Bear until she head Root mumble something, before thrashing an arm across the bed and whacking Shaw in the head.

“Root” Shaw groaned rolling towards the edge of the bed to dodge any other stray arms. The room fell into silence for about five seconds before Root suddenly screamed, sending Shaw bolting upright, her hand searching to flick the light on immediately.

“Root” Shaw said again her voice a whisper. The light was only dim, but was enough for Shaw to see Root tangled in the sheets next to her, hair stuck to her sweaty forehead, a frown on her face, her breathing fast. She was still asleep. But to any other person it looked like she was being tortured.

It only took Shaw a split second to move towards Root, instinctively putting a hand on her clammy forehead, and the other hand on Root’s shoulder.

“Wake up” Shaw said quietly nudging her shoulder. Root moved underneath her hand and a let out a small groan. “You’re having a bad dream, Root, come on.” Shaw said trying to gently shake Root awake.

Root just wriggled underneath her before mumbling something else, Shaw watched her still desperately trying to wake her up, then suddenly Root let out another scream, so loud that it jolted her from her sleep, her eyes flashing open as she half sat up in fright, Shaw catching her.

“Hey hey, it’s just me” Shaw said as Root stared at her bewildered, her breathing ragged and sweat still beading on her forehead, tears staining her eyes. Shaw kept her hands on Root’s shoulders watching her closely, Root blinked several times clearly still not completely awake, her breathing started to return to normal and Shaw could feel her getting heavier, like she falling back asleep again.

“Root” Shaw said shaking her a little. “Don’t go back to sleep.” Shaw took a hand off Root to snap her fingers in front of Root’s face a couple of times to try and get her attention.

Root looked at Shaw and then yawned.

“Sameen” Root mumbled sleepily.

“Hi” Shaw said with a small smile as Root rubbed an eye while looking at her. “You’re okay now.”

“Did I die?” Root asked sleepily and Shaw immediately frowned.

“No, Root, you had a nightmare.” Shaw said tucking Root’s hair behind her ear. Root stared at her confused.

“You died.” Root said and Shaw just stared at her.

“I didn’t, baby” Shaw said “I’m right here.”

“They shot you” Root murmured in confusion “And I….I couldn’t save you, I was tied to the…”

“Shh” Shaw interrupted pulling Root closer to her, wrapping her arms around the other woman and rubbing her back gently. “No one died.”

“I saw you” Root whispered into her ear.

“It was just a dream” Shaw said pulling back a little so she could look at Root, “I’m definitely alive, you can take my pulse if you want to.”

Root stared at her, dark eyes tired, her head groggy from the dream, the remainder of the drugs still trying to leave her system. She put her hand on Shaw’s face and dragged her thumb across Shaw’s cheek lightly.

“It was a dream” she said softly and Shaw nodded.

“A pretty crappy one too” Shaw added and a smile twitched at Root’s mouth.

“I’m tired” Root said sleepily.

“I know” Shaw said “But if you go back to sleep right now you might have the same dream.”

“I don’t want that” Root said with a frown, and Shaw almost smiled at the childlikeness of Root when she was sleepy.

“I’ll stay awake with you for a little bit, yeah?” Shaw said and Root just nodded. “What do you want to have a dream about?” Shaw asked trying to distract her.

“Um,” Root said rubbing her eyes again. “You.”

Shaw smirked. “But you just did that and it didn’t go so well…”

“I want a different dream about you” Root said and looked at her.

“Like what?” Shaw asked as Root’s fingers traced up Shaw’s arm and across her collarbone, down to the dip in her chest.

“Maybe when you smile,” Root said watching her fingers curl into the scoop of Shaw’s tank and tug it down. “And it makes me feel all melty inside.”

“Does it?” Shaw asked glancing at Root’s hand.

“Or maybe” Root said “I could just dream about your face” she said lifting her eyes so they were looking at each other. “I love your face, I just want to trace over it until my fingertips have it memorised.”

“They don’t already?” Shaw asked with a small smile on her face and Root bit her bottom lip.

“Maybe.” she answered softly watching as Shaw’s fingers twisted around a piece of her hair that was hanging between them.

“That sounds better than a nightmare.” Shaw said and Root smiled.

“You’re like heaven to dream about” Root said her finger running across Shaw’s bottom lip softly. Shaw caught Root’s finger between her teeth lightly before releasing it and giving it a kiss.

“Do you wanna go back to sleep now?” Shaw asked and Root just shook her head. “You don’t?”

“No because dreaming about you still isn’t as good as sitting here looking at you in the middle of the night” Root said and Shaw smiled.

“You’re an idiot” Shaw said and nudged her playfully.

“And you’re a kissable idiot” Root said unable to stop looking at her. Shaw stared at her for a second before lifting an eyebrow.

“Kiss me then.” Shaw said her lips slightly parted as the words left her mouth, and before she had a chance to take a breath Root kissed her. Softly, she tasted faintly like mint, and smelt like sleep. Her hair brushed against Shaw’s cheek, her lips warm against Shaw’s. The kiss lingered on their lips before her tongue slipped into Shaw’s mouth running circles around Shaw’s. A smirk appeared on Shaw’s face as her hands came up to Root’s pulling them apart for a brief moment so Shaw could look at her.

“What?” Root asked with a smile. “You said it.”

“I know.” Shaw said and Root just leaned in and kissed her again. Then in a fairly swift movement Root rolled on top of Shaw and pushed her back down onto the pillows, catching her hands and pinning them up near her head, Root straddling Shaw’s body.

“Really?” Shaw quirked an eyebrow with a smirk playing on her mouth.

“Wanna go?” Root asked interlacing their fingers above Shaw’s head.

“You were ninety percent asleep five minutes ago” Shaw said and Root let her lips graze against Shaw’s.

“You know how to wake a girl up” Root said against Shaw’s lips. Shaw rolled her eyes, unable to do anything else from being pinned under Root.

“Fine” she mumbled against Root’s lips.

“It needs to be more than just fine, baby” Root said with a smile, and Shaw stared at her before spreading her legs under Root’s body and leaning up pushing her tongue into Root’s mouth, kissing her deeply and quickly before pulling back.

“Fuck me,” Shaw said looking her straight in the eye and Root smirked. “Please.” Shaw added.

“You’re such a good girl remembering your manners” Root said squeezing Shaw’s hands lightly as she pressed her hips down against her getting the smallest moan out of Shaw.

Root moved so that she was straddling Shaw’s uninjured leg, leaning forward on her knees and kissing Shaw deeply, keeping her hands pinned up over her head. She felt Shaw hips her hips and move against Root’s leg, grinding softly as their kiss grew hungrier, more passionate, almost desperate on Shaw’s end as she quickly become turned on.

Shaw tried to push Root’s hands up, but Root quickly slammed her arms back down and smirked.

“For the love of god” Shaw groaned “Let me touch you.”

“No” Root said and kissed Shaw’s neck softly, repetitively, feeling Shaw’s breath quicken.

“You can’t keep my hands up here and go down there at the same time” Shaw said digging her nails into to the top of Root’s hands.

“Luckily we have handcuffs” Root said glancing up at Shaw with a smirk, Shaw let her head fall back against the pillow as Root kissed across her collarbones.

“Fuck you” Shaw said and Root smirked.

“Wait your turn,” Root replied and placed a soft kiss on Shaw’s lips.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay kids, considering this story is as much yours as it is mine, I'm conducting a general consensus. If you want to see these two adorable idiots (potentially) adopt Belle please comment below.... now is your chance ;)
> 
> Hopefully you enjoyed this chapter... I'm really digging getting these softer "normal" moments between the two of them, so there are still more coming. And thank you for your ideas and thoughts on what you want to see, I love appreciate and love reading them all ...consider them all dually noted ;)
> 
> Thank you for reading, you're all fantastic! x  
> Stay tuned as I try to keep posting daily whilst also being in my last semester of university and working part time ;)))))


	27. New Years Eve

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> this is just part one...

“Oh you look very sexy when you’re wet” Shaw said with a smile as she kissed the end of Bear’s wet nose as he stood in the bath looking at her confused.

“Don’t give me that look” Shaw said rubbing the dog shampoo over his fur. “I’m trying to make this as comfortable for you as possible, it’s not my fault you rolled in mud though.”

Bear stared at her and barked, trying to shake the shampoo off his fur. Shaw struggled to keep a solid grip on him as he moved around in the bath trying to get away from her. Shaw groaned and got to her feet before climbing into the bath with him and wrapping her arms around his body to keep him still.

“Bear” she said quietly into his ear “If you make more a mess I’m going to get in trouble.”

Bear whined and Shaw kissed the top of his head before reaching for the shower hose to wash the shampoo off him.

But as she sprayed the water on him lightly he barked again, and jumped out of the bath sending a wave of water both over Shaw and the edge of the bath soaking the tiled floor as he scrambled towards the door.

“Bear” Shaw growled looking down at her soaking wet clothes as she climbed out of the bath and tried not to slip over as she followed him out of the bathroom. Coming round the corner just in time to see him at Root’s feet, he glanced over his shoulder at Shaw before shaking his wet fur all over Root.

“Sameen” Root said through gritted teeth as she looked over at Shaw with an unimpressed look on her face.

“That was him, not me” Shaw said holding both her hands up as she silently cursed the dog.

“Get your dog back in the bath _now_ ” Root said.

“Oh now he’s my dog” Shaw rolled her eyes and clicked her fingers at Bear, but he just ignored her and started sniffing around the floor.

“Sam, seriously” Root said grabbing Bear by the collar and towing him over to where Shaw was still standing near the bathroom door.

“You could help” Shaw said taking Bear by the collar from Root and glaring at her before pulling him back towards the bathroom trying not to slip.

“It’s more fun watching you get yourself all wet like that” Root said as Shaw disappeared back into the bathroom.

“Do not do that again” Shaw said to Bear and pointed at the bath tub where he sulkily hopped back into. “How did Harold do this?” Shaw muttered to herself as she tried again.

Minutes later it was like a bad episode of deja vu as Bear fled the tub again, but this time Shaw managed to jump out and grab him, however she had forgotten the floor was wet and seconds later found landed with a sharp thud on the ground. Her head hit the tiled floor but her arms remained holding onto the dog who stood above her and licked her face with concern.

Root stuck her head around the door when she heard the crash and saw Shaw laying back down on the floor soaking wet clutching the beast of a dog.

“What happened?” Root asked trying not to smile as Shaw opened her eyes and stared up at Root.

“I have a mild concussion and Bear thinks it’s hilarious” Shaw groaned pushing the dog off her but remaining on the lying ground.

“Are you okay?” Root asked anxiously biting the corner of her lip.

“Oh just great” Shaw said letting out an exhausted sigh.

“At least you didn’t start crying when you bumped your head” Root said with a smirk as she crouched down beside Shaw, pushing the door to behind them so Bear wouldn’t escape.

“What am I, five?” Shaw asked as Root took her hands and pulled her so she was sitting up and leaned her against the side of the bath.

“Sometimes” Root said, her hand reaching round to touch the back of Shaw’s head, feeling for any lump or sign of blood.

“I’m fine” Shaw said trying to push Root’s arm away weakly.

“Are you?” Root asked looking at Shaw with concern behind her eyes.

“Yeah” Shaw said “You’re even holding up twelve fingers.”

Root smirked and got to her feet.“You need to get changed” she said to Shaw. “We have somewhere to be tonight.”

Shaw lifted an eyebrow as she stared up at Root. “Like where? The couch?”

“Calendars really aren’t your thing are they?” Root said as Shaw frowned. “It’s New Years Eve.”

Shaw rolled her eyes. “So?”

“So we should celebrate!” Root said and Shaw just stared at her.

“What exactly are we celebrating? The concept of time?” Shaw asked and it was Root’s turn to roll her eyes.

“I want to kiss you at midnight, okay?” she said and stuck her hand out to Shaw who just smirked.

“ _Okay_ ” Shaw said and took Root’s hand letting her pull Shaw to her feet. “But only because of this whole marriage situation.” Shaw added with a smirk and Root whacked her across the arm.

“Guess what handsome?” Shaw said turning back to Bear who looked at her inquisitively. “You’re going to Harold’s for New Years.” Bear wagged his tail happily and Shaw just rolled her eyes with a grin.

“Root” Shaw called out coming out of the bathroom and walking into the bedroom where Root was standing half naked. Shaw stopped for a moment and leaned against the doorframe to watch until Root turned around and smirked.

“What?” she asked hooking her bra behind her back.

“Um, I forgot” Shaw said staring at her, Root lifted an eyebrow in disbelief.

“That easy?” Root said running her hands through her hair and Shaw just looked away.

“You better not be dragging me to Times Square” Shaw said and Root laughed.

“Oh those millions of poor people don’t deserve that” Root said and Shaw frowned.

“Rude.”

“I’m doing them a favour by not letting you near that place” Root said with a smirk and Shaw folded her arms.

“So where are we going?”

“You’ll see.” Root said and pulled on one of Shaw’s t-shirts.

Shaw stared at her for a moment then started pulling off her wet clothes, piece by piece until she was naked. “Why won’t you tell me?” she asked Root who’s eyes had widened. Shaw looked at her as she pulled open a draw and grabbed some underwear as Root just stared at her open mouthed.

“You always learn to shut up at the most inconvenient times” Shaw said with a smirk starting to pull fresh clothes on, walking over to Root their bodies almost touching, reaching around her to grab a pair of jeans. She went to pull away but Root grabbed her by the hips.

“You’re going to need your car” Root said her voice almost husky as she stared at Shaw their faces near touching.

Shaw quirked an eyebrow with her interest peaked. Root leaned in to kiss her but stopped just before she reached Shaw’s lips and smirked, pulling back and grabbing her leather motorcycle jacket off the coat hanger.

Shaw stared after her in confusion. “Why do you need that if I’m taking the…”

“We’re gonna race, baby” Root said with a smile her tongue between her teeth.

“Race?” Shaw repeated excitement rushing through her veins, as she quickly pulled on the rest of her clothes and grabbed a jacket following Root out the door, leaving it unlocked so Reese could come and get the dog.

“Where exactly are we racing to?” Shaw asked sitting on the bonnet of her Ferrari as Root pulled on her leather gloves.

“Unisphere in Queens” Root smirked.

“Rules?” Shaw asked and Root stared at her.

“We follow each other, no splitting up, and no distracting” Root said pulling her helmet on, leaving the face shield up looking at Shaw.

“What does the winner get?” Shaw asked curiously.

“To drive.” Root said simply, “the other persons.”

Shaw lifted an eyebrow “I’ve always wanted to take your bike for a spin.”

“Too bad you still never will” Root said and Shaw’s tongue ran across the bottom of her teeth as she stared at Root.

“I’m adding another rule.” Shaw said and folded her arms. “Winner gets to do whatever they want to the loser.”

Root smiled behind her helmet. “What do you want to do to me, Sameen?”

“Nothing nice.” Shaw said standing up and opening the door to the drivers seat.

“May the strongest engine win” Root said with a wink as she swung a long leg over the bike and Shaw slammed her door.

*

They lined up next to each other on the road, and Root looked at her smirking, the shield still up on her helmet so Shaw could see the devilish look in her eyes as she held up three fingers.

Shaw’s foot itched to move off the break as Root put one finger down, leaving two very familiar fingers sticking up before she pointed them forward, seconds later the roar of her motorbike engine ripping through Shaw’s body as she shot ahead.

Shaw was a split second behind as her engine growled as she floored the accelerator.

The streets of New York were mostly deserted, it was already dark and most of the city were probably long since gathered in Times Square for the ball drop. Shaw kept her eyes Root, following her every move, her car crept closer to bike, dangerously close to the point where if Root slowed down Shaw could knock her right off her bike. And that would not be good, considering the speed they were going. But Root glanced behind her with a wild look in her eyes and a smile behind the helmet as she pulled down the face shield, so all Shaw could see was black, revving her engine and accelerating forward away from Shaw.

Shaw tapped her earpiece as she watched Root weaving ahead of her.

“Is this what normal people do?” Shaw asked when she heard Root’s breathing on the other end.

“It’s what we do.” Root replied and Shaw smirked as she pressed further down on the accelerator and easily slid past Root into the lead.

They cat and moused all the way to Queens, but as they approached The Unisphere both their speeds picked up. Shaw stopped watching Root, determination kicking in. That stubborn desire to always win.

Root watched Shaw from the corner of her eye, knowing that her wife had a deeply rooted competitive streak that was about to come out and play. As they approached the round about Root split away from Shaw going left while Shaw went right. She pressed her bike to go faster, watching Shaw still making sure there was going to be enough room for them to cross paths without her crashing. As Shaw got closer Root swung into the inner side, her bike tipping to the side as she took the corner hard, feeling the hot friction of the leather on the knee of her pants grazing against the concrete. Her thighs tightening to keep her on the seat she pulled back upright and pushed back towards the street they had come down, slamming the break on hard at the same time Shaw did. Her bike nose to nose with the Ferrari.

Shaw got out of the car with a wide smile on her face and Root felt her heart racing in her chest, one from the exhilaration of the ride, but two because of that fucking smile that made her want to disintegrate into a puddle.

“I totally won.” Shaw said walking over to Root who pulled her helmet off, her chocolate brown hair disheveled.

“By barely a millisecond” Root said still sitting on the edge of her seat.

“But I won” Shaw said putting her hands on Root’s handlebars with a smirk and Root rolled her eyes. “Say it.” Shaw said that smile still tugging at the corners of her mouth.

Root stared at her, looking at that smile, letting it fill her heart.

“You won” she said so quietly her lips barely moved.

“Sorry, I didn’t catch that?” Shaw said and Root folded her arms.

“You won.” she said only a fraction louder and Shaw grinned.

“Damn right I did.”

“Don’t be so cocky” Root said pretending to be annoyed but secretly enjoying the look on Shaw’s face.

“It was your idea” Shaw smirked and Root stepped off her bike and pulled her gloves off.

“It was” Root said watching Shaw, going over to her and reaching out to touch her but Shaw dodged.

“Did I say you could touch me?” Shaw asked with a troublesome grin still on her face.

“That’s how it’s going to be is it?” Root asked with a smirk as she looked up at The Unisphere and took a deep breath. Shaw watched her for a second before looking at the sculpture.

“Why here?” she asked.

“No cops around this area, especially tonight” Root said and Shaw turned to look at her.

“And the real reason?” she asked and Root bit her lip feeling Shaw’s eyes on her.

“Because,” Root said and turned to Shaw who was still watching her, those dark eyes, a smile still sitting behind them. “This was the first place I ever came when I moved to New York,” Root said and Shaw didn’t move her eyes off of her.

“I was completely alone then, and now…” Root paused and glanced back at The Unisphere.

“Now you have me.” Shaw finished for her and Root looked back at her instantly, not expecting to hear those words.

“Now I have you.” Root said looking at her softly.

“If you’re going to cry,” Shaw said “give me fair warning so I can ride off on your bike.”

Root just rolled her eyes and tried not to laugh. “I married an asshole.” she said and took a step away from Shaw.

“Come here” Shaw said and caught her wrist pulling her back so their hips were basically touching.

“You’re getting a little too good at reading me” Root said lacing their fingers together on both hands.

“But that’s good right?” Shaw said and Root smiled.

“You’re so beautiful” Root said quietly.

“That’s not an answer.” Shaw said.

“Shut up.” Root said and kissed her lightly.

“Okay that’s a better answer,” Shaw said as Root’s lips lifted off hers. “So was this our last stop?” Shaw asked “Did you want to have sex on the hood of the Ferrari or was there somewhere else on your list?”

“As tempting as that offer sounds, we have to be somewhere else” Root said glancing at the time on her phone screen.

“Do I get directions?” Shaw asked looking up at Root with a smirk.

“Follow me.” Root said and pulled away to go back to her motorbike but Shaw held onto her.

“Hey” she said and Root turned back around “if you’re gonna bring me here, at least kiss me properly.”

Root quirked an eyebrow at Shaw who had a cute smile tugging at the corners of her mouth and Root couldn’t resist. How was she supposed to say no, she thought as she pulled Shaw closer by the front of her jacket until their lips met. Crashing together, kissing her deeply.

How was she meant to say anything, except I love you. _Infinitely._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> lmao you guys... I love you but I almost shit myself when I woke up and saw the volume of comments on that last chapter.   
> not even sure that produced a conclusive answer it almost seemed about 50/50, the reason I asked was it would be the easier way to keep this story going, I am running a little dry on ideas and it was just a fleeting idea I played around with.... but we shall see.   
> For now, I'm more than happy to take any suggestions or ideas about what kind of development you want to see this relationship go through.  
> I love you all. Your comments (although anxiety inducing sometimes) mean the world to me x
> 
> This is just part one of NYE.... your favourite author is a little sleepy tonight :P


	28. New Years Eve (Part 2)

“I didn’t realise that getting arrested and spending the night in a prison cell was on your to do list tonight” Shaw said trailing behind Root as she got into an elevator.

“You’re forgetting my best friend is a God, Sameen” Root reminded her hitting the top floor button and Shaw rolled her eyes.

“Right, tell that to the three times that She let me get arrested” Shaw said bitterly and Root smirked.

“She was busy.”

“Still rude.” Shaw said and folded her arms as they rode up to the top floor. When the doors opened there was a flight of stairs in front of them with a door at the top. Root went up the stairs and Shaw followed behind her wondering what exactly the plan was.

Root opened the door with a hair pin and it swung open onto the roof of a high rise building. A gust of cold air swirling around them as they stepped outside, Root propped the door open with a brick outside, as Shaw wandered towards the edge, hearing a strange amount of voices coming from down below.

As Shaw looked over the edge she saw that they were right above Times Square, a million people creating a sea below them, glancing across she saw the ball that was lifted, ready to drop at midnight.

“What do you think?” Root said coming up beside with her a smile.

“You wanted the best view in the city.” Shaw said with a smirk and Root just looked at her.

“I wake up to the best view in the city every morning.” she said and Shaw glanced at her before rolling her eyes.

“Stop.” she said and nudged Root lightly.

“Never.” Root said and looked over the edge at the bright colourful lights of Times Square.

“So you’re keeping me at a safe distance from all those people?” Shaw asked leaning over the edge carelessly, Root’s hand automatically shooting up to grab her by the back of the jacket, but stopping before she made contact, letting it hover there unnoticed.

“If we were down there you would have punched at least four people by now.” Root said and Shaw looked at her with a smirk.

“This is much cooler” Shaw said and Root opened her mouth in shock as she stared at Shaw.

“You think?” Root asked and Shaw just nodded still peering over the edge with a slight grin. “Is that like…a compliment?” Root asked still shocked that Shaw had said that, “Are you giving me a twisted compliment?”

Shaw leaned back against the edge railing and looked at Root.

“I guess.” she said folding her arms loosely. Root smiled.

“I’ve impressed you” Root said and Shaw lifted an eyebrow wondering why Root was so stunned by those few little words.

“You realise I wouldn’t have stayed married to you if I thought you were completely lame” Shaw pointed out and Root looked at her.

“I guess I never thought about the fact I ever…”

“Impress me?” Shaw asked and Root gave a little shrug. “You do.”

“Really?”

“Root, seriously?”

Root stared at Shaw. 

“Do I need to make a list?” Shaw asked and Root bit her lip.

“Don’t do that” she said and looked down and Shaw rolled her eyes, turning back to Times Square.

“One, you can shoot someone without looking, two, you can cook without giving me food poisoning, three, your food actually tastes amazing, four…” Shaw said turning back around to face Root who’s cheeks had flushed pink as she stared at Shaw in amazement.“You’re stupidly smart which by default makes you good at almost anything, five, you look good all the damn time, even when you’ve woken up from a nightmare, six, you gave me a _Ferrari_ for Christmas, seven, we’re standing on a skyscraper overlooking Times Square on New Years Eve… you’re impressive, okay.” Shaw said and Root just looked away with a smile on her face.

“You didn’t have to…”

“You wanted a list.” Shaw smirked and Root chewed her lip as she looked back at Shaw.

“I want to say something” Root said “But it’s making me nervous.”

Shaw lifted an eyebrow and watched her closely, having already noted her mannerisms seemed a little on edge.

“Well it’s not like you’re going to propose” Shaw said with a smirk and took a step closer to Root. “Don’t be nervous.”

“It’s not even anything important” Root said looking into the distance and Shaw frowned.

“It’s obviously important to you if you’re nervous.”

“You know you’re different now, right?” Root asked and looked back at her.

“Am I?” Shaw asked unsure where this was going.

“It’s not a bad thing, Sam.” Root said. “It’s just like you’ve relaxed with me.”

“I mean…we’re married.” Shaw said watching Root’s eyes.

“Yeah but, that was never a guarantee that you’d …I don’t know, be any different to the way you were, but now I catch you looking at me and there’s something behind your eyes that’s different, and you know when to say something I need to hear, or when to kiss me or even hold my hand even if it’s not an initial reaction for you… you do it and,” Root paused as she looked down at her hands. “And I kinda realised I loved you before we got married, and I thought that was that…I’d fallen in love with a girl who has a personality disorder, but then you start acting like you give a shit, and you tell me you love me when you’re high on laughing gas and suddenly I can barely stand having you out of my sight and …it scares me.”

“What scares you?” Shaw asked with a frown unable to look away from Root’s eyes, even if Root wasn’t looking at her.

“That I need you so much,” Root said finally making eye contact with Shaw. “I can’t actually live without you, Sameen.”

Shaw stared at her for a few silent moments as she processed Root’s words.

“You don’t have to.” Shaw said quietly, carefully reaching forward catching Root’s forearm and letting her fingers slide down it until they grazed across the palm of Root’s hand.

“And then you do that…” Root said softly looking down at their hands. “And my heart kind of feels dangerously explosive.”

“Yeah,” Shaw said with a smile as she looked at Root “that’s because you feel enough for both of us.”

“It’s a little overwhelming” Root whispered and Shaw just looked at her smiling before looking over the edge at the sea of people.

“How do you think they feel?” Shaw said with a smirk and Root rolled her eyes. Shaw looked back at her. “You know you don’t need to be scared right?”

“Easy for you to say” Root said with a hint of humour in her voice.

“I’m not going anywhere, any time soon” Shaw said looking at her. “Unless I get shot…” she added with a smirk and Root frowned.

“That’s not funny.”

“I know, it hurts a little” Shaw said and held up her hand where the bullet wound had almost finished healing, leaving a round scar in the palm of her hand. “But you know that.” Shaw said and put the bullet hole right over Root’s chest where the bullet had hit her too, lining up their wounds perfectly.

“It’s not easy turning off something that scares you” Root said.

Shaw looked at her with the smallest smile on her lips. “I’ve got you, Root, forever. That’s kind of what this whole marriage thing is about right? That, and carrot soup” Shaw said with a little shrug. “Oh and fantastic sex.”

Root couldn’t help but smile.

“See” Shaw said seeing the smile “you have nothing to be worried about, I can shoot a gun, take out big angry men, and kiss you at the end of the day, I’ve got you.”

“Does it bug you how often I tell you I love you?” Root asked and Shaw took a step forward, tucking Root’s hair behind her ears as she looked at her.

“Why would it?” she asked.

Below them a sea of a million people’s voices started to chant, counting down as the clock hit ten seconds until midnight.

They just stared at each other as the voices below them counted down. Shaw glanced over her shoulder briefly at the ball, before looking back at Root with a smirk. Three, two… one.

Fireworks cracked through the air, confetti came from every single direction, people yelled excitedly on the ground below them. But it was all background noise. They reached for each other at the exact same moment. Their lips crashed together, noses cold from being outside, hands freezing on each others skin. But their lips warm. Soft. Perfect. Root felt Shaw smile against her lips and seconds later her heart fluttered with happiness.

“I love you” Shaw mumbled against Root’s lips.

“I love you, too” Root said with a smile kissing the corner of Shaw’s mouth before pulling back. “We have to go…”

“Go where?” Shaw asked lifting an eyebrow, her cheeks slightly pink from the kiss.

“The airport.” Root said and bit back a smile as Shaw looked at her curiously.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know, I know, but they had to say it ;)
> 
> What do you think? Where is Root taking them next.....
> 
> Thank you for all your comments and suggestions, honestly please consider the door always open if you have an idea or something you want to see, I take everything into consideration!
> 
> Love x


	29. Resolutions

“I just don’t get what you didn’t understand about not bringing me from one cold place to somewhere even colder,” Shaw said staring at the mountains directly ahead of where she was standing.

“Sameen, relax, this is going to be fun” Root said with a grin picking up their bags and turning around walking into the hotel.

“For who?” Shaw asked with a groan as she spun around to follow Root, seeing her breath appear in front of her in a cloud. “Who’s going to be having fun when I have hypothermia?”

“You’re being dramatic” Root said dropping their bags down again loudly in the lobby, getting the immediate attention of the concierge and woman behind the desk.

“Welcome to Salt Lake City” the woman said with a smile. Root smiled back and Shaw just folded her arms in a sullen protest, leaving Root to deal to the paperwork.

When they got to their room Shaw immediately went to throw open the curtains, despite the fact it was still early in the morning to the point where the sun hadn’t come up yet. She looked at the mountains and couldn’t find much of a reason to be mad with that view staring back at her.

“I’m cold.” Shaw said and turned around to face Root.

“Then take your clothes off and get underneath me” Root smirked and Shaw just lifted an eyebrow before looking at the bed.

“I didn’t sleep on the plane.” Shaw said.

“Neither did I” Root said “Which means we haven’t slept all night.”

“Did you bring me here so we can have sex with a mountain view?” Shaw asked and Root just smirked cranking up the heat and starting to pull off her jacket.

“Among other reasons.” Root grinned and Shaw just rolled her eyes.

“You’re gonna have to tell me sooner or later” Shaw said watching as Root pulled off her jeans and top, until she was standing in front of Shaw in nothing but her underwear.

“Later” Root said pretending to think about it for a moment before climbing into the bed. Shaw lifted an eyebrow as Root patted the spot next to her. “We’re not here for that long Sam, we might as well make use of the bed.”

Shaw rolled her eyes and pulled off her jeans before climbing into the bed with Root.

“What was wrong with The Bahama’s?” Shaw muttered as Root slipped her arms around Shaw and tried to climb on top of her. But Shaw stopped her, pushing Root back down onto the pillows and climbing on top of her. Shaw sat on Root’s legs, with her arms pinned up by her head.

“I didn’t know the cold bothered you that much” Root smirked and Shaw just stared at her.

“It’s you that bothers me” Shaw said and Root’s smirk just rolled straight into a smile.

“If you say so” she said letting Shaw keep her arms pinned up.

“I say so.” Shaw said.

“I think you’re forgetting something” Root said and Shaw lifted an eyebrow.

“A gun?”

“No, Sam” Root said “We have our entire lives to go anywhere in the world, but right now, we’re here.”

Shaw rolled her eyes. “Unless we get shot.”

“Don’t be so pessimistic it’s New Years” Root said wiggling her hands out from Shaw’s half assed grip and running them across Shaw’s shoulders.

“As long as we don’t have to make…”

“New Years resolutions?” Root grinned. “We do.”

“I don’t want to” Shaw said and folded her arms, still contently perched straddling Root’s legs.

“Did I say you had a choice?” Root asked letting her hands rest on Shaw’s thighs.

“Fine.” Shaw said and stared at her. “Sex, daily.”

Root laughed and Shaw just lifted an eyebrow.

“That wasn’t a joke.”

“We have sex almost everyday, Sam” Root said still smiling.

“So let’s make it everyday” Shaw said with a shrug and Root chewed her lip.

“Have you been thinking about that?”

“No.”

“Yes you have” Root giggled and Shaw leaned forward wrapping her fingers around Root’s throat, their eyes locking. “Mm choke me harder.” Root said with a wink and Shaw immediately took her hand off Root.

“You’re impossible.” she said shaking her head and Root’s laugh filled the room again. “I’m going to sleep.” Shaw said and wiggled further down Root’s body until she was laying down, one leg loosely slung over Root’s and she rested her head on Root’s chest comfortably and let out a sigh.

Root stared down at Shaw who was happily laying on top of her, and smiled, letting her fingers run through Shaw’s hair lightly.

“You’re gonna sleep _there_?” Root asked.

“Mhm” Shaw said. “I’ve made my resolution now I’m going to sleep.”

“Don’t you wanna hear mine first?” Root asked.

“No” Shaw said and Root felt her smile, her face against Root’s stomach.

“Well aside from getting shot less I have a few” Root said her fingers still gently playing with Shaw’s hair.

“Like what,” Shaw said lifting her head so her chin was resting on Root’s sternum as she looked at her wife. “Drink more water?”

Root rolled her eyes.

“Well you’re not allowed to come to the gym with me, like ever, you’re practically a noodle.” Shaw said.

“A noodle?” Root repeated and Shaw grinned before putting her head back down again.

“I can’t take the suspense anymore” Shaw said sarcastically, “just tell me.”

Root smiled as she ran her fingers through Shaw’s hair, looking down at her unable to help but notice her long dark eyelashes, her perfect looking fingers that were resting up by her face, the sound of her breathing. And then her breathing changed, and Root glanced to the side and saw that Shaw’s eyes were shut. She’d fallen asleep in seconds.

“Well the first one was about listening…” Root said to herself with an amused look on her face.

*

“I’m going to _murder_ my wife.” Shaw said and Root cackled with amusement.

“Harold hasn’t called saying my numbers up” Root said clicking her ski boots onto her skis and digging her poles into the snow.

“That’s irrelevant” Shaw said.

“Technically” Root smirked and Shaw just rolled her eyes staring at Root, who was standing in front of her on her skis in white ski pants, and a black jacket that had a huge fur hood.

“I don’t ski.” Shaw said simply.

“No, that’s why you’re on a snowboard” Root pointed out, looking at where Shaw was sitting on the snow with a black board clipped to her feet.

“The whole sliding thing just is not something I participate in, ever” Shaw said.

“I think you just don’t want me to be better at this than you” Root said and held her hand out to pull Shaw up. “Which is a shame, considering I already am.”

“This could have been The Bahama’s” Shaw said letting Root pull her up then dusting the snow off her butt as she tried to stay upright.

“You probably have stronger thighs than most snowboarders, Sam” Root said skiing in a circle around Shaw easily. “Stop fretting.”

“I’m not fretting” Shaw said through gritted teeth and Root stopped in front of her.

“You talk a lot when you’re nervous” Root said and Shaw glared at her.

“Don’t have feelings, remember?” Shaw said and Root shoved her shoulder lightly and Shaw immediately lost her balance, Root laughed then grabbed her before she could slip over.

“Let’s go to the ski lift” Root said “I have an idea.”

“I stopped trusting your ideas about eight hours ago” Shaw called out as Root skied ahead of her. Shaw groaned and unzipped her jacket, feeling uncomfortably warm from the amount of exercise she was getting from constantly pulling herself up off the fucking ground.

When they had woken up from their nap she had been dragged from the hotel immediately, handed a bag of pastries and then a snowboard.

Two hours later her muscles were screaming more than they ever had before. Shaw was almost 100% certain she’d pulled at least three muscles and that this was _not_ helping her leg wound in the slightest. She hated being bad at something, or at least she had forgotten what it was like to start learning a skill from the beginning. _“Where’s your perseverance?”_ Root had asked her after about twenty minutes of her laying on the snow and grumbling. _“You fight until you’re practically unconscious but you won’t get your perfectly sculpted muscles up and try beat me down the mountain?”_ Root had asked and Shaw had pointed a finger gun at Root and pulled the trigger before pulling herself up and beating Root down the mountain, even though she cheated by letting Root pull her for most of the ride she still pushed her wife over before they got to the bottom so she would win.

They sat on the ski lift and Root swung her skis happily as she marvelled at the view. Shaw watched Root curiously and with an almost smile playing at her mouth.

“Is this what you’d be like as a normal person?” Shaw asked and Root turned to look at her with a happy grin.

“You tell me” Root said and Shaw lifted an eyebrow.

“You’d probably be way cooler than you come across” Shaw said.

“You’d still hate grocery shopping” Root said.

“And you’d still be into kinky sex” Shaw smirked.

“I know you don’t hate this as much as you’re pretending to” Root said staring at Shaw.

“It’s easier not to hate things when you’re around” Shaw said and glanced at Root “because obviously I channel my hate at you instead.”

Root rolled her eyes. “Your sarcasm although highly offensive is always so endearing, because it’s your way of indirectly agreeing with me.”

“I don’t know what you just said but you need to help me get off this thing like now” Shaw said staring at the rapidly approaching landing at the end of the ski lift. Root glanced ahead of them and smirked.

“Want me to push you?” Root asked.

“Don’t you dare” Shaw said but before Root had a chance to say anything else they both pushed off at the same time. And it was fine. Until Shaw immediately lost her balance when she didn’t dig her heel into the snow to stop her board from moving without her, and automatically reached for Root. Grabbing her suddenly, sending her off balance. Then sent the two of them toppling into the snow, Root landing with a thud on top of Shaw.

“Well this is familiar” Root smirked leaning forward and kissing Shaw on the end of her nose before she rolled off. Shaw rolled her eyes and pulled herself so she was sitting up.

“This is never happening again” Shaw said “If you ever want me to like you.”

Root grinned. “Stop threatening me Sameen, you can take your board off anyway, we’re here.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so this is a half chapter again, because gasp. I missed a daily update. And I'm currently late for work and without a wallet so that's just....fun.  
> But a small update is better than none I figured.  
> More soon xxxx


	30. What Are You Doing To Me?

“I’m beginning to see what you’ve done” Shaw said.

“You wanted to take your clothes off, and I wanted snow” Root said with a satisfied smirk as she climbed into the outdoor jacuzzi beside Shaw.

“I should’ve seen that coming” Shaw rolled her eyes but couldn’t help smile, she was in a private hot tub on the side of a mountain after all. “You always get what you want.”

“That’s true” Root said with a smirk as Shaw climbed on top of her.

“I’m back to being mildly impressed.” Shaw said and Root moved to kiss her, but Shaw pulled back quickly.

“What?” Root asked with a pout, her hands creeping up Shaw’s back as they sat in the bubbling hot water.

“You.” Shaw said looking at her.

“Well that’s vague.” Root said trying to smirk but just looking flustered instead.

“I know what you’re doing” Shaw said and Root lifted an eyebrow seductively.

“And what am I doing, Sameen?”

“I know you’re using this as a distraction before we end up back in Vegas again” Shaw said watching Root’s face closely. “I wasn’t born yesterday.”

Root stared at her for a few seconds, and she blinked a couple of times. “You don’t know that.”

“I do” Shaw said the smirk on her face growing.

“How could you possibly?” Root asked.

“Because you blink too much when you lie to me” Shaw said and tapped the end of Root’s nose.

Root narrowed her eyes, a small frown forming between her eyes. “Are you making fun of me, Sam, because if you are I’m gonna make you get out.”

Shaw slid her arms around Root’s neck.

“You always make fun of me” Shaw pointed out and Root just smiled.

“But not when I’m sitting on top of you topless.”

Shaw immediately lifted an eyebrow as she glanced down, then to the side seeing her bikini top floating in the water next to them.

“How did you do that?” Shaw asked momentarily baffled that she hadn’t noticed Root slipping it off.

Root rolled her eyes. “Get out, Sam.”

Shaw looked at her with a frown. “No way.”

“I wasn’t asking, Sameen” Root said and pushed Shaw off her. “Out.”

“And if I don’t?” Shaw asked lifting an eyebrow.

“The only way I’ll be touching you is with a bullet” Root said with a wink.

Shaw opened her mouth and stared at Root like she was entirely crazy.

“I wasn’t making fun of you, Root” Shaw tried one last time, but Root just lifted an finger with black painted nails out of the water and pointed at the snow surrounding them.

“Out.”

Shaw stared at the pavement with her jaw clenched before looking back at Root one last time.

“Please, baby.”

Root lifted an eyebrow with a smirk. “Oh now you call me _baby_.”

“I will do anything” Shaw said staring at her.

“Okay” Root smirked “get out.”

Shaw rolled her eyes up to look at the sky before pulling herself out of the tub, stopping halfway as the freezing cold air touched her bare skin making every hair on her body stand up on end, a shiver shooting down her spine.

“All the way out” Root smirked putting a hand on Shaw’s ass and pushing her until she got out, and was standing topless and shivering on the path that led to the spa, with a scowl on her face.

“Are you happy now?” Shaw asked with her teeth beginning to chatter as she folded her arms tightly across her chest in any attempt to preserve her body heat.

“Unfold your arms” Root said resting her chin on the side of the tub.

Shaw glared at her, and Root arched an eyebrow waiting, until finally Shaw let her arms fall to her side. Feeling her fingers and toes start to go numb, and her lips losing feeling.

Root tilted her head to the side as she admired Shaw’s figure.

“On a scale of one to to ten how cold are you?” Root asked.

“Twelve.” Shaw replied through clenched teeth.

Root grinned, staying silent for several painful seconds before turning her attention away from Shaw.

“Get back in.” she said and Shaw moved as fast as she could, climbing back into the tub and dropping all the way down until everything was submerged except for her head.

“Better?” Root asked and Shaw glared at her.

“Not yet” Shaw replied flexing her fingers under the water to try and get rid of the tingling feeling.

Root moved closer to her and then straddled Shaw’s lap, pulling her forward so she wasn’t leaning against the edge and wrapped her arms around Shaw, pressing their bodies together tightly. Shaw immediately felt Root’s warmth against her skin, the soft smell of fruity shampoo, Root’s nails on her back.

“Better?” Root asked and placed a gentle kiss on Shaw’s shoulder.

“A little.” Shaw replied hiding her smirk.

“Put your fingers inside me” Root whispered into her ear.

“Did forcing me out of the hot tub really turn you on that much?” Shaw asked with a smirk moving her head so she was looking at Root, whose pupils were dilated enough for Shaw to know the answer to that question without needing a verbal confirmation.

“Get in me” Root growled softly taking one of Shaw’s hands and forcing it down between her legs. Shaw smirked still watching Root, their eyes locked.

“What if I don’t?” Shaw said purposefully letting her fingers graze the inside of Root’s thigh.

“You know better.” Root said resting her forehead on Shaw’s.

“Maybe” Shaw said not moving her eyes off Root’s. “Or maybe I like a little trouble.”

“Sameen” Root said grabbing Shaw by the wrist hard. Shaw lifted an eyebrow feeling Root’s death grip around her wrist, and lifted her free hand up to grab Root around the neck.

“Root.”

Root stared at her, and Shaw could feel her pulse beating fast under her fingers, heart racing. Arousal, fairly fucking obvious, her breathing was sharp as she stared at Shaw, before Shaw pulled her closer and kissed her. Root’s grip automatically loosening off her other wrist, and she pushed her fingers inside Root the same moment she kissed her, contracting an moan and a gasp from Root that filled her mouth.

“Better?” Shaw smirked against Root’s lips, her eyes still open as she watched Root’s face.

“Faster.” Root mumbled, and Shaw automatically started moving her fingers faster, feeling Root rocking against her, her fingers sliding into Shaw’s hair and gripping it gently.

Shaw watched Root with a mild amusement, keeping her fingers moving inside her at a fairly rapid pace. Occasionally placing a kiss on her mouth, or catching Root’s bottom lip between her bottom lip. Shaw could feel her forearm tensing but she didn’t stop. She could tell Root was close, she went quiet right before… a loud moan echoed through the air around Shaw.

“Oh god” Root murmured breathlessly and rested her forehead on Shaw’s shoulder.

“Damn you’re easy” Shaw said a smile spreading across her face as she felt Root’s teeth sink into her shoulder. “Hey don’t bite me, it’s not my fault you practically orgasm at the sight of my nipples.”

Root lifted her head and looked at Shaw who still had a smile on her face.

“Don’t look at me like that.” Root said and kissed her to try and get the smile off but Shaw only smiled even more and Root felt it as their lips touched.

“You’re cute” Shaw said and kissed Root’s nose. “And easy, especially for someone so…elaborate.”

Root just stared at Shaw while she smiled.

“Can you imagine if I put any kind of leather on you’d probably have soaked your pants before I even touched you.”

Root’s mouth opened a little as the imagery filled her mind and Shaw just laughed.

“It’s hard to tell because we’re in water… but you feel a little wet, baby” Shaw smirked running her hands over Root’s thighs then up to her waist.

“What are you doing to me?” Root asked as she shifted her position on Shaw, so that she was only straddling a single leg.

“What are you doing to _me_?” Shaw asked and glanced down at Root’s thighs that were now tightly gripping one of Shaw’s. She felt Root move against her leg and smirked. “Was it the leather?” Shaw asked taking Root’s hands and pinning them behind Root’s back. “Would lace be better?” Shaw asked holding Root’s wrists firmly. “I could tie your hands up with lace.”

“Lace tears easily” Root said her voice was low, her dark eyes fixated on Shaw.

“Not if I threaten you if you rip it” Shaw said and Root just watched her.

“With what?”

“I’ll burn you” Shaw smirked “With an iron.”

“Unoriginal.” Root smiled.

“Karma.” Shaw said and kissed the corner of Root’s mouth.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorrrrrrrry this took forever, but here's the other half of this chapter!  
> Thank you so much for bearing with me, it's been a crazy couple of days. I currently have a short film screenplay to write so my attention has been elsewhere, but I'm trying to get back on track with regular updates for you lovely humans!
> 
> Let me know what you think! Thank you for endless support xxxx


	31. Vegas 2.0

“I just feel like this is a terrible idea” Shaw said kicking her feet up onto the dashboard as she looked through the window as Root refuelled the car at the gas station.

“At least you _feel_ something.” Root said with a smirk leaning on the roof of the car with one arm lazily as she stared at Shaw through the window.

“Shut up” Shaw said rolling her eyes thrusting her hand back into a bag of chips.

“Why are you so opposed to having a little fun, Sam?” Root asked and Shaw just stared at her.

“Last time we _had a little fun_ we ended up married, Root.” Shaw said bluntly.

“And look how well that turned out” Root said chirpily and Shaw almost laughed.

“Yeah, so fantastically” Shaw said sarcastically and munched on a chip but Root just stared at her with wide eyes, when Shaw realised the silence she looked back at Root.

“Do you regret staying married to me?” Root asked and Shaw just groaned.

“Fuck, here we go.” Shaw said and banged her head back against the headrest of the seat, and Root just stared at her expectantly.

“Tell me.”

“What the hell do you think?” Shaw snapped and Root just stared at her before reaching inside the car and grabbing some money from the glove box before turning to go inside and pay.

Shaw rolled her eyes and stared at the desert road, moments later Root reappeared and slammed the car door as she got back in.

“Are you done?” Shaw asked and Root shot her a look.

“With what?”

“Being annoying.” Shaw said and Root glared at her. Shaw groaned. “I can’t believe you.”

“Oh please elaborate Sameen” Root said sarcasm lacing her voice and Shaw stared out the window. “God only knows that’s a rare occasion.”

“Do you have like a UTI from the hot tub or something?” Shaw asked “Is that why you’re being so crabby?”

Root’s jaw clenched as Shaw looked back over at her furiously. “Fuck you.” Root said.

“You’re infuriating.” Shaw said folding her arms.

Silence filled the rental car for at least five minutes while both of them simmered in frustration.

Shaw was the first one to break. “Seriously, what is wrong with you?”

Root rolled her eyes. “You probably have a list, Sameen.”

“Why do you doubt me so fucking much?” Shaw said staring directly at Root feeling like her gaze was somewhat fiery.

“I’m not doubting you, Sam” Root said her tone softening a little as she felt Shaw’s frustration filling the small space between them.

“So what is it?” Shaw asked. “You’re scared? Yeah, you mentioned, and I told you I’m here, and I love you, were you even listening or did I say it into the wrong ear?”

Root’s jaw tightened and her hands gripped the wheel tighter. Shaw rolled her eyes, but mostly at herself knowing that was probably the lowest blow she could make. Root didn’t say a word, which made Shaw’s stomach tighten.

“Root,” Shaw said adjusting her tone “I’m… I shouldn’t have said that.”

“It’s fine.” Root said.

“So I can finger you while you drive then?” Shaw asked jokingly and Root finally looked over at her, with dark confused eyes. She was obviously hurt by Shaw’s comment, that much was obvious, it was all over her face, and practically pouring out of her eyes.

“What?” she asked through tight lips.

“You’re obviously not fine.” Shaw said and Root blinked a couple of times as she looked back at the road.

“Maybe it’s just me” Root said staring at the road as she drove, feeling Shaw’s eyes on her that dark focused stare. “It’s probably just been me this whole time.”

“Doing what, Root?” Shaw asked.

“Your the one with the personality disorder, but you still do everything right” Root said “I’m always the one that’s questioning you, and not believing in this marriage.”

“So what?” Shaw asked “Most people probably wonder that everyday.”

“I know” Root said “But I feel like one day you’re just going to wander off, and I know that you know you won’t, but sometimes it feels too good to be true, and I know you can’t reassure me and tell me it’s going to be okay but…”

“It’s going to be okay” Shaw said cutting in and Root glanced at her almost smiling, and Shaw lifted an eyebrow. “I’m not a sheep, Root, I’m not just going to _wander_ off.”

Root chewed her lip.

“I don’t think your obsession with me is going to end anytime soon,” Shaw pointed out “which means even if I wanted to go somewhere, which I don’t, you’d probably just kidnap me.”

Root couldn’t help but smile a little, Shaw leaned over and kissed her cheek lightly.

“I may not be a perfectly functioning member of society” Shaw said stretching her legs across Root’s lap. “But that doesn’t mean I’m going to abandon my wife, or my marriage.”

Root glanced over at Shaw. “Did you read a wife material handbook or something?”

“No” Shaw smirked “I just know you.”

*

“We’ve been driving for five hours” Shaw groaned “We have to get food first.”

“You know what I really want?” Root asked and Shaw glanced over at her.

“If you say me I might just stab you.”

“I was actually going to say pizza… but you’ll do.”

Shaw rolled her eyes. “Pizza.”

“And then we’re going to drink” Root smirked.

“Oh great” Shaw said “and what if we wake up divorced?”

“We’ll have to stay another night and get remarried” Root said with a smirk and Shaw just rolled her eyes as they got out of the car.

“Have you ever considered a non drunken wedding?” Shaw said sarcastically but Root just turned to look at her.

“Yes.” she replied and Shaw raised an eyebrow. “A lot actually.”

“Okay stop.” Shaw said walking ahead of Root into the hotel.

“You bought it up Sam” Root said staring at her as she walked off.

“As a joke” Shaw said and Root just frowned.

“We could actually consider it though” Root said following behind her.

“No, Root”

“But Sameen, we could do it for Harry” Root almost begged as they lined up to check in.

“Harold does not need to watch us getting married” Shaw said firmly.

“I think he’d love it” Root said with a smile “he loves weddings.”

“And you know that how?” Shaw asked.

“Because I’m not a sociopath, Sam” Root smirked leaning closer to Shaw.

“No, you’re a psychopath” Shaw said turning to her so their faces were near touching. “Which is worse?”

“Do you really want to know?” Root smirked.

“Next!” the woman behind the desk called out and Root slipped ahead of Shaw to take care of the paperwork.

“You’re not going to let this go are you?” Shaw said as they walked through the hotel towards the elevator that would take them up to their floor.

“You know me so well” Root grinned as she got in and Shaw just groaned.

“Regrets” she murmured and Root smirked.

“Think about it Sam, we could have a proper wedding and we could even go on a honeymoon…”

Shaw rolled her eyes. “You’re taking this normal people thing too seriously.”

“Call me crazy Sam, but maybe these normal people are onto something.” Root said with a shrug and Shaw just stared at her in shock.

“You’re not crazy, Root, you’re borderline psychotic.” Shaw said. “You _hate_ normal people, they’re just a panicked little flock to you.”

Root looked at Shaw softly.

“Don’t heart eye me in the elevator.” Shaw said without even looking at Root, just feeling eyes watching her.

“Shut up” Root said her cheeks going red as the doors opened and they stepped out, walking towards their room.

“No” Shaw said opening the door with the key card and walking into the oversized suite Root had arranged. “At least this isn’t the same room as last time” Shaw smirked and dropped her bags in the middle of the floor.

“That would have been funny though” Root grinned walking straight over to the counter where a pizza was sitting.

Shaw lifted an eyebrow. “How the hell did you…”

“I’m trying to outdo you for wife of the year” Root said with a wink as she flipped the pizza box open and almost moaned at the smell, before picking up a piece and dangling it above her open mouth before biting it.

“I’m glad your actual orgasms are sexier than your foodgasms” Shaw said walking over to her and picking a string of melted cheese off her chin and eating it.

“Well at least you can tell them apart” Root smirked watching Shaw “Sometimes I can’t tell whether you’re eating food or three fingers deep.”

“You’re disgusting” Shaw mumbled through a mouthful of pizza and Root just laughed, eating another slice of pizza and perusing the alcohol choices.

“Tequila shots?” she asked and glanced at Shaw.

“If I can take them off your stomach,” Shaw replied and Root lifted an eyebrow, holding her pizza between her teeth and pulling off her jacket and then her shirt, dropping them on the ground and jumping up onto the counter. Shaw watched her with a smirk. Root finished her slice of pizza as she reached for a lime and a couple of shot glasses.

“I could just pour it on my skin and make you lick it off” Root asked as she cut the lime into wedges.

“We’ll get there” Shaw said dropping a crust into the pizza box and pushing it out of the way, grabbing the salt and pushing Root down.

Shaw filled the shot glasses and Root watched Shaw closely. Shaw ran her fingers lightly over Root’s bare stomach and then stopped.

“Take off your bra” Shaw said and Root looked at her curiously but didn’t ask any questions, sitting up she reached behind her and unclipped it, letting it fall down her arms before tossing it to the side.

Shaw pushed Root back down again and examined her body, before shaking a decent amount of salt onto her finger and sprinkling it around Root’s nipple.

Root opened her mouth to say something but smirked instead.

“Interesting” she said quietly and Shaw just grinned, before rimming Root’s other nipple with salt too then picking up one of the shot glasses, and a wedge of lime.

“Ready?” Shaw asked.

“Are you?” Root replied. Shaw smirked before leaning down her tongue running a circle around Root’s nipple licking up all the salt before she downed the shot and sucked the lime wedge. A small gasp escaped from Root’s lips at the brief feeling of Shaw’s warm tongue.

Shaw dropped the lime wedge and the empty glass, and picked up the second shot glass and another lime. Her tongue suddenly circling Root’s other nipple, collecting the other side of salt before repeating the shot and lime, slamming the shot glass down on the counter and standing upright, tilting her head to the side her eyes shutting briefly as the liquid went down her throat.

“ _That’s_ how you do tequila shots” Shaw said when her eyes opened again and Root just stared at her wide eyes in awe.

“All in favour” Root smirked sitting up and kissing Shaw deeply, letting her tongue into Shaw’s mouth tasting the tequila and lime on her tongue.

“Your turn” Shaw said against Root’s lips as she pulled away slowly. Root slid off the counter and refilled the shot glasses. “What should I take off?”

“Everything” Root smirked and Shaw just rolled her eyes.

“Top or bottom only” Shaw said and Root eyed her.

“Bottom” she decided and Shaw lifted an eyebrow in amusement as she pulled off her jeans.

“Underwear too” Root said and Shaw just looked at her. “Play fair, Sam.”

Shaw rolled her eyes and pulled off her underwear before sliding up onto the counter and watching Root carefully.

“I will not forgive you easily if you get salt up there” Shaw warned and Root just grinned.

“Relax, Sameen.” Root said running her hand over Shaw’s thigh slowly. Then slowly tapped some salt across her pelvic line on both sides.

She glanced up at Shaw, arming herself with lime and a shot glass before leaning down and licking off the salt, throwing back the shot with a slight cringe before the taste of the lime hit her lips. Dropping the shot glass back down on the counter she picked up the next one, leaning down and licking the salt off Shaw’s pelvic bone more slowly, teasingly, before taking the shot and the wedge of lime.

Shaw watched her with a smile playing at her lips.

“You’re sexy” she said when Root finally looked over at her after wiping the corners of her mouth.

“So are you” Root said leaning down to kiss her again hungrily. When they broke away from each other Shaw sat up, pouring them another shot each and handing one to Root.

“Let's get fucked up” she said and Root clinked their glasses together.

“I thought you’d never ask” Root said with a smirk.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I may be stupidly busy but I always have time for this goddamn fic ;)  
> Soorry that the updates are coming a little slower, I'm trying my best!  
> I'm gonna be at Troye Sivan tomorrow night so the update is gonna be late...advanced apologies.  
> ENJOY THIS CHAPTER ....I think I might have to elaborate on what they get up to this time in Vegas ;)  
> love x


	32. Chapter 32

Shaw was not a light weight. Root, well a little more so.

Root had felt the tequila shots tingling through her body by the time they got into the elevator, but that was over an hour ago. And now she had lost count of the number of drinks she had downed, her brain struggled to produce a coherent line of thought and she felt light as a feather.

Root looked over at Shaw and in a blur of movement saw her wife being hoisted upside down by two burly looking guys as she put the hose of a keg stand in her mouth, while they held her legs up.

“Whatareyoudoing” Root drunkly yelled over the sound of people at Shaw, who didn’t hear her.

“She thinks she can beat the record holder” the guy standing next to Root said.

Root stared at him blankly then looked back at Shaw.

“But she’s so _tiny_ ” Root exclaimed and the guy just laughed.

“She’s got 15 seconds left” the guy said looking back at Shaw and Root frowned.

“Sameen” Root screamed at her “If you don’t beat this record I’m divorcing you”

Several of the guys looked over at Root and Shaw just lifted one arm off the table and gave Root the thumbs up.

All the men around surrounding the two of them started counting down excitedly and then five seconds later they let Shaw back down. She staggered backwards wiping her mouth, Root reached out and grabbed her by the arms and pulled them together. A couple of the overly impressed guys slapped her on the back in congratulations.

“Are you okay tiny person?” Root asked and Shaw just looked up at her and grinned.

“I’m drunk” Shaw replied and Root puts her hands on Shaw’s cheeks.

“Me too” Root said and they stared at each other “and also, we are we?”

Shaw looked around, wherever they were was crowded and dark and had loud music that she could feel through her body.

“Let’s go” Shaw said and linked her fingers in with Root’s so they wouldn’t get separated in the crowd of people.

“Where?” Root asked and Shaw turned to smirk at her.

“I’m not telling” Shaw said as she began to fight their way out. “Now you know what it’s like.”

Root pouted. “It’s different when I do it.”

“Sure baby” Shaw said accidentally bumping into several people as she dragged Root towards the bar.

“This isn’t the door” Root said close behind Shaw, their bodies touching.

“No, but I need you to sit here and look sexy for a moment” Shaw said turning to Root.

“What are you saying, Sameen” Root slurred “That I don’t look sexy every all day?”

Shaw rolled her eyes and unbuttoned Root’s shirt down at least two buttons lower than what’s socially acceptable, her black laced bra showing at the front. Shaw ran her fingers through Root’s hair messing it up a little then smirked.

“Disheveled sexy” Shaw said “Not fucking myself on the kitchen counter sexy”

“Why not” Root pouted.

“Because you’d get arrested” Shaw said “And that’s for me only.”

A smirk flickered on Root’s lips. “All the seats are taken” she pointed out and Shaw rolled her eyes turning around and picking the guy closest to her, grabbing him by the collar of his shirt and launching him out of his seat.

“Looks like one just opened up” Shaw smirked and planted a kiss on Root’s lips as she pushed Root towards the seat. “Get his attention.” Shaw said nodding at the bartender before disappearing into the crowd of people around the bar.

Root tried to keep her eyes on Shaw but her vision blurred quickly and she lost her in seconds, letting out a small sigh she turned towards the bartender and whistled loudly to get his automatic attention.

Shaw watched from the other side of the bar as the bartender immediately took interest in Root, she tried not to get distracted at the way Root was leaning across the counter, her shirt hanging half open, the curve of her breast visible in that black laced bra. Shaw’s head felt fuzzy. She was drunk, she couldn’t remember the last time she felt this drunk. Literally. It was probably the last time she was here, and she physically cannot remember that.

Climbing over the counter she jumped down into the bartenders space, her eyes scanning the well stocked shelves, finally seeing what she wanted she grabbed the bottle around the neck and went to climb back over the bar. Shaw glanced over her shoulder first making sure Root still had the bartender distracted, but what she saw was something she wasn’t ready for.

Root had a drink in her fingers, and the bartenders face inches from hers. Those dark brown eyes fixed on the bartenders, focused, undistracted. Shaw frowned, feeling a rush of anger race through her veins as the bartender leaned closer to Root. Suddenly she slammed the bottle down next to Root’s glass causing them both to jump. The bartender looked at her in confusion but Shaw just glared at Root.

“What are you doing?” Shaw demanded.

“Hey lady, you can’t be back here” the bartender interrupted and Shaw just grabbed him by the ear causing him to yelp.

“You said distract him” Root said with a small frown.

“Yeah with your tits not with your goddamn heart eyes” Shaw argued and Root lifted an eyebrow. “And you” Shaw said turning back to the bartender.

“That’s my _wife_ ” Shaw said before throwing a right hook and letting him fall to the ground, before climbing up over the bar, looking around for a space to get down. Shaw settled with Root and slid off the bar so that she was straddling her wife, before reaching behind her grabbing the bottle off the bar, along with Root’s hand and storming out.

The Vegas Strip was lit wit a thousand lights and despite it being winter, and the middle of the night it still wasn’t that cold.

“Saaam” Root whined as she did a little skip to keep up with the pace that Shaw was walking at.

“Why did you do that?” Shaw snapped turning around abruptly causing Root to crash into her and stumble backwards.

“You stopped walking” Root frowned and Shaw rolled her eyes.

“Not that” she said “You almost kissed that bartender.”

“I didn’t” Root frowned “He almost kissed me”

“Why did you almost let him?” Shaw asked.

“I wouldn’t have let him get any closer, Sameen” Root said and Shaw frowned. “I didn’t realise you got jealous so easily”

“I don’t.” Shaw snapped and Root smiled.

“I think yes” Root said and followed after Shaw as she kept walking. “You punched him” Root giggled and Shaw rolled her eyes.

“What did you expect me to do?” Shaw asked.

“Exactly that, but it’s still funny” Root said slipping her hand into Shaw’s.

Shaw stared at their hands briefly before looking back up trying not to bump into everyone.

“You know you’re not walking in a straight line” Root said with a smile.

“Shut up” Shaw said.

“You know something else” Root said trailing behind her still. “You’re kinda hot when you get jealous”

Shaw didn’t say anything, she just kept walking more aware of how crooked each step she took was, the colourful lights of Vegas not doing anything to aid her drunkness.

“So you stole ludicrously expensive champagne and now you’re angry at me” Root said and Shaw stopped spinning around to look at Root again.

“How did you manage ludicrously?” Shaw asked with a frown “You’re off your face.”

“Are you impressed?” Root smirked and Shaw rolled her eyes using her teeth to help pull off the wire around the bottle top, and then flicking it with her thumb letting it pop off. Catching the escaping champagne with her tongue before it ran off the side of the bottle, her eyes locked on Root’s.

“Give me that” Root said suddenly taking the bottle from Shaw’s hands, taking a sip before taking Shaw’s face in her free hand and kissing her softly in the middle of the busy street.

Shaw could taste the champagne on Root’s lips, the sweet bubbly taste and underneath it something more familiar. It was Root’s _I love you_ kiss. Even though they were both drunk she could still tell the difference.

“Sorry” Shaw mumbled against Root’s lips and Root pulled back hearing that word.

“Really?”

Shaw looked at her “just a little, I wanted to hit him.”

Root smirked, but just as she was about to answer a woman came running out of a club screaming. Several people stopping to see what was going on, Root immediately distracted looked over at the scene.

“Do you think we should…” Root started and Shaw turned to look at her.

“Was she wearing a green dress or a red dress?” Shaw asked and Root looked at her.

“I thought it was blue” Root frowned and Shaw stared at her.

“Exactly” she said “We’re not exactly ready to fight bad guys”

Root grinned “And we’re meant to be normal.”

“Right” Shaw nodded seeing a policeman walk inside. “So what would normal drunk people do?”

Root lifted an eyebrow looking at Shaw before taking off running down the road. Shaw stared after her a laugh falling from her lips as she watched Root run away from the scene.

When Shaw finally caught up with Root after chasing her down the strip, Root was sitting on a ledge still holding the champagne but in her other hand was a huge souvenir cocktail drink in the shape of the Eiffel Tower.

“Where did you get that?” Shaw laughed as she stopped in front of Root, their knees bumping together where Root was sitting.

“Someone handed it to me” Root grinned and Shaw took it from her hand inspecting it, feeling her head spinning.

“You shouldn’t” she started “It could be a trap”

“A trap?” Root lifted an eyebrow looking at Shaw. Shaw rolled her eyes and sat down beside Root then noticed what was directly in front of them.

“Did you come here on purpose?” Shaw asked taking a sip from the champagne.

“I don’t control my body” Root said with a slight slur and Shaw just smiled staring at the chapel that they had gotten married at.

“Do you think someones getting married right now?” Shaw asked and Root leaned her head on Shaw’s shoulder.

“Probably” Root replied. “Do you think they’re going to get divorced tomorrow?”

“I don’t know” Shaw replied “Hopefully not.”

Root smiled. “Do you think you ever would have become this if you hadn’t married me?”

Shaw looked at Root. “No.”

Root had some more champagne still looking at Shaw.

“I think it’s you” Shaw said.

“Do you resent me for it?” Root asked.

“How could I?” Shaw replied. “You gave me the one thing that I thought was impossible”

“Multiple orgasms?” Root asked and Shaw laughed.

“I mean yeah, that too” Shaw said “I was gonna say you made me feel…something”

Root smiled a little “like an orgasm” she whispered and Shaw nudged her lightly with an amused grin.

“Yeah Root” Shaw said loudly “Being with you is like a virgin who had her first orgasm.”

Several people walking by stared at the two of them but Root just giggled, ignoring everyone else, unable to stop looking at Shaw.

“I wish there were words more than I love you” Root said.

“I don’t know man, those are pretty strong already” Shaw said and Root arched an eyebrow.

“Did you just call me man?”

“Shh” Shaw said pulling the champagne from her hands and taking a sip. “Don’t judge the drunk.”

“I’m gonna ask you a Q” Root said staring at Shaw seriously.

“Go” Shaw said and Root lifted the champagne up.

“What for?”

“Marriage,” Shaw said with a shrug “You.”

Root smiled. “You’re so fucking perfect.”

“Stop” Shaw said.

“No, I won’t” Root said putting a hand on Shaw’s leg. “I jus don’tgetit” Root said her drunk words falling into a pile as they left her mouth. “You’re so…outstanding, I don’t know how to do with it”

Shaw lifted an eyebrow, looking at Root’s genuinely baffled expression.

“You’re supposed to have all these issues and not car if I wander out into the road and get hit by a plane, but here you are stealing expensive champagne for me and saving my ass everyday” Root said shaking her head in complete drunken disbelief. “And you tell me you love me, like foooor real” she exclaimed and Shaw just laughed.

“You done?” Shaw asked.

“Kiss me and I’ll shut up” Root said and Shaw immediately leaned in but suddenly Root got distracted, looking across the road and seeing a couple come stumbling out laughing from the chapel, followed by a wedding party. Shaw ended up kissing Root’s cheek and frowned.

“What was that?” Shaw frowned.

“Wanna crash a wedding, Sam?” Root asked suddenly and Shaw followed Root’s gaze and grinned.

“Oh fuck yes.”

“How do we follow them?” Root asked watching as they got into a limo that was waiting outside. Shaw glanced around and saw a carpark beside the wedding chapel and seeing a motorbike.

“Stay here” Shaw whispered unnecessarily and got up, dashing across the road and hot-wiring the motorbike before climbing on and gently releasing the clutch so that the bike would start rolling without touching the throttle.

“Sam” Root squealed when Shaw pulled up next to Root. “You can’t!”

“I already have, get on” Shaw said tossing Root the spare helmet.

“But you’re _drunk_ ” Root whispered the last word as she pulled the helmet on and climbed on the back without protest about not driving.

“Yeah well I hold alcohol better than you” Shaw said feeling Root’s arms wrap around her waist, the warmth of her body pressing against Shaw’s back. She wondered briefly if this was why Root liked driving so much.

“Just…be careful” Root said her voice practically in Shaw’s ear.

“Don’t worry” Shaw said revving the throttle, catching sight of the limo up ahead and pulling out from the curb. She almost couldn’t tell how fast she was going, until she glanced at the meter and saw she was well under the speed limit.

They followed the limo all the way back to a hotel which wasn’t far from where they were staying. They climbed off the bike ditching it before they followed the wedding party into the hotel, through the lobby and into a function room where the entire place had been decked out for a wedding reception.

“Do you think they planned this?” Root asked almost shocked as they looked around the tables.

“Some people do this on purpose” Shaw said they slipped into a seat.

The wedding reception continued with the two of them remaining unnoticed by everyone else, or greeted politely in passing. Then came the speeches, Root propped her chin on her hand as she watched various friends and family stand up to speak and laugh about the newly weds. Shaw watched Root. Her cheeks flushed a gentle red from the intoxication, the look in her brown eyes soft as she gazed almost longingly at the couple.

“What are you thinking?” Shaw whispered moving closer to Root so she was leaning against her arm.

“I’m trying to figure out what people would say about us” Root said glancing at Shaw with a small smile. “We don’t have any cute stories.”

“Thats not true” Shaw said trying to think of one.

“Marcus met Alice when he spilt coffee on her” Root said nodding at the couple “I met you when I was impersonating someone else then almost burnt you with an iron.”

“That’s a lot more interesting if you ask me” Shaw said still looking at Root, who was still gazing at the couple.

“Did you want this?” Shaw asked. “Even if our stories are about torture and shooting each other.”

“I don’t know” Root said and put her hand over Shaw’s.

“Because I’m kind of fine with how this turned out” Shaw said glancing towards the couple, away from Root. “I think our story is automatically better than theirs, because we actually got married by mistake”

“Mistake?” Root echoed quietly.

“Well we didn’t intend to go on a business trip and get married” Shaw said with a smirk “Nor did we intend to stay married.”

“And now we have a dog and a brownstone” Root smiled.

“And a Ferrari” Shaw smirked. “I’d like to see Alice and Marcus here do a better job than us at marriage.”

Root smiled. “I think Harold would probably find something nice to say about us.”

“Maybe we should ask him someday” Shaw said looking at Root.

“Do you think we’re going to make it to being really old?” Root asked staring across the room at an old couple who were holding hands, smiles stretched across their aged faces.

“I don’t know, Root” Shaw said.

“It’s a nice idea don’t you think,” Root said taking a sip of water from the glass in front of her. “Drinking tea and reading classics all day.”

Shaw rolled her eyes but couldn’t help a smile. Suddenly music filled the room and the newly weds took to the dance floor for their first dance, moments later other couples followed. Root stared at them with a stupid smile on her face and Shaw looked at her, then at the dance floor, before getting to her feet and holding out a hand.

“May I have this dance, Samantha Groves?” Shaw said with a small smile, her words only slightly slurring. Root was almost unable to answer for a moment as she stared at her drunk wife, who wavered slightly in front of her as she held out a hand, looking directly at her. Then there was that smile. It was the smile that melted her heart, every goddamn time. What are you supposed to do when the person who’s meant to have a sociopathic personality disorder looks at you with that smile, the smile that reaches her eyes and dissolves your heart into a puddle?

You take her fucking hand. Root reached out and took Shaw’s hand unable to help the smile growing on her face, unable to ignore the flutter in her chest.

“Yeah, Sameen” Root said softly as Shaw tugged her towards the dance floor. Root felt Shaw’s hand slip around her waist, their chests press together as Shaw pulled them closer. Shaw’s fingers entwined with Root’s. She felt her breath catch in her throat as Shaw’s dark eyes looked at her. This was their dance, Root thought, their first dance.

“This is _not_ the song I would have picked” Shaw said quietly and Root smirked.

“What’s wrong with Ellie Goulding?” Root said with a smirk. “Although I wouldn’t have gone with How Long Will I Love You as much as I would have been tempted for I Know You Care” Root smirked and Shaw rolled her eyes.

“It suits them though” Shaw mumbled and Root arched an eyebrow.

“It does” Root said glancing over at the couple with a smile.

They moved seamlessly to the song, if not stumbling slightly but that only being from the amount of drinks consumed. Root looked at Shaw, unable to move her eyes anywhere else.

“What song would you pick?” Root asked, she watched Shaw think about it for a second.

“Sinatra, It Had To Be You” Shaw said and quirked an eyebrow “you?”

Root looked surprised, thens smiled. “Love, Michael Buble”

Shaw groaned slightly “Ugh I hate you.”

“I know” Root whispered her ears pressed against Shaw’s ear “but I also heard you singing to his christmas album.”

Shaw purposefully stood on Root’s toes and watched her try not to yelp.

“That was definitely not me” Shaw shrugged.

“Okay but it was” Root grinned her nose brushing against Shaw’s cheek. “How are you feeling?”

“Not like I’m going to puke, why?” Shaw asked glancing at Root, their arms still firmly wrap around each other.

“Do you want to see something cool?” Root asked.

“Is it illegal?” Shaw asked.

“Probably” Root smirked.

“I’m in.” Shaw said with a smile and Root quickly stole a kiss from her champagne stained lips.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey kids, miss me ;) i'm so sorry for the loooong wait! life has been crazy and then I got a stomach bug so I've been stranded at home trying to get so much work done, but also....it's given me time to write, so it's a nice big update for you x
> 
> I haven't abandoned you don't worry! xxxxx


	33. Hangover and Sex

Shaw’s phone was ringing, but Root didn’t care. They were tangled in the sheets, completely naked. Root had Shaw pinned to the bed, her fingers dancing their way down Shaw’s stomach down towards the soaking wet spot between her legs. Root was straddling one of Shaw’s thighs, working herself up while they kissed.

“Root” Shaw mumbled, hearing her phone persistently buzzing on the nightstand. “I should…”

“Shut up?” Root asked pressing the sensitive spot between Shaw’s legs, a moan growling out from her teeth as Shaw’s eyes flashed opened and looked at Root, who just smirked.

They hadn’t slept. The sun had come up, just, and they had been on top of each other alternately for hours. They had been drunk when they had gotten back to the hotel room after breaking onto the roof of the Bellagio, and now, they found themselves staggeringly sober. Desperately avoiding wild hangovers, with well, sex.

“It’s not gonna stop by itself” Shaw said running her hands down Root’s chest.

“Neither am I” Root said glancing down as Shaw caught Root’s nipple between her fingers and lightly squeezed it making Root gasp.

“It’s annoying” Shaw said and suddenly the ringing stopped. Shaw let her head fall back onto the bed and Root smiled.

“Annoying things go away eventually, unless it’s me” Root grinned and Shaw rolled her eyes. Then suddenly the phone started ringing again and Shaw groaned.

“Or _that_ ” Shaw frowned and Root kept her trapped underneath her.

“Just ignore it” Root said grinding on Shaw’s leg lightly, pinning Shaw’s arms beside her head and kissing down her neck softly.

“I can’t” Shaw mumbled and Root stopped, sitting up with a pout,

“Fine then get it” she said, her cheeks flushed, her hair a mess of chocolate brown.

“You’re on me” Shaw said with a small smirk and Root didn’t bother to move.

“You’ll find a way if it’s that important” Root said with a shrug and Shaw rolled her eyes.

“Really?”

“We’re having sex, Sameen, and you want to answer your phone, really?” Root folded her arms across her naked chest and Shaw tried not to smile.

“It’s gotta be important if they haven’t stopped calling yet” Shaw said sitting up, Root still on her leg, wrapping her arms around Root for a moment letting their bodies be close. Feeling Root’s warm skin against her own.

“Don’t be cute, Sameen” Root said refusing to hug her back.

“Mm but you’re warm” Shaw said pulling Root’s body closer and holding her tightly in her strong arms. Root glanced down at Shaw who had wrapped herself around Root’s waist and bit back a smile.

“I thought you wanted to answer the…” Root started but Shaw reached around Root grabbing her phone off the table, and wedging it between her ear and shoulder as she returned her arms tightly around Root. Shaw’s chin on Root’s chest as she looked up at her wife with a smirk.

“What?” Shaw answered.

“Sameen” it was Harold’s voice. A frown automatically flickered on Shaw’s face as she grabbed the phone from her ear and climbed out from underneath Root, rolling onto her stomach.

“Is everything okay?” Shaw asked.

“I’m sorry to bother you, but I have a bit of a situation” he said and Shaw lifted an eyebrow.

“It’s fine, Harold, what is it?” Shaw asked. Root sat behind Shaw looking at her body as she talked on the phone quietly, Root took no notice of who was calling. Instead she started running her hands up the back of Shaw’s thighs all the way up to her ass, which she took in both hands, digging her fingers in and leaning down to bite it.

“W-what was that?” Shaw said down the phone, the change in her tone immediate as she felt Root’s teeth sink into her ass. Throwing an arm back to try and get rid of Root she missed and Root just started kissing Shaw’s hips, and up her side, slowly, lightly. Like a feather. Root heard Shaw’s breathing change and figured that whoever was on the other end of the phone would hear it too.

“Mhm” Shaw said through gritted teeth as she tried to focus on Harold’s voice rather then the warm caress of Root’s lips working their way up, to her…oh god, her neck.

Root kissed along her neck starting at the shoulder, biting lightly in between kisses, leaving a trail of little red marks as she went, taking her time on each one. Her dark eyes glanced at Shaw, who was propped up on her elbows, holding the phone to one ear, her head hanging forward, hair covering her eyes, trying to ignore Root.

“Yeah _Harold_ ,” Shaw said trying to emphasise his name so that Root would stop when she realised. But all that did was make it worse, she felt Root smirk against her skin. Root brushed Shaw’s hair away from the back of her neck and ran her tongue across it before kissing it gently, sucking lightly.

“I..t-totally, mm” Shaw struggled to get her words out feeling Root’s breath against the back of her neck.

“Are you alright Sameen?” Harold asked and Shaw’s eyes fluttered back open.

“Yeah, I’m-” Shaw started but Root was fast sliding her hand down between Shaw’s legs and running a single finger through her wetness.

“Holy fuck” Shaw said the words tumbling from her lips before she could catch them, immediately tensing up as she gripped the phone and rolled over under Root, so Shaw was on her back and they were face to face.

Root lifted an eyebrow innocently, sitting up on her knees beside where Shaw was lying, the look on her face asking what it was that she had done wrong.

“Sameen?” Harold’s voice said from down the line.

“I’m here” Shaw said catching one of Root’s rogue hands with her free one and holding it tight enough so that she heard one of Root’s knuckles pop. Root just grinned, still with one spare hand more than Shaw, began to walk her fingers across Shaw’s stomach down towards… Shaw wedged the phone back between her shoulder and ear and reached out for Root’s hand, but she missed. Root stuck her hand high up in the air so Shaw couldn’t get it. Shaw held up her index finger in warning and before picking the phone back up again, still keeping her death grip on Root’s other hand, threatening to break a finger.

Root just grinned cheekily as they stared at each other, slowly lowering her hand to between her own legs. Shaw followed Root’s hand with her eyes, watching it slip between her legs, not realising until a moan filled the room that Harold would…

“Was that…” Harold was startled and probably scarred for life, Shaw thought, she could hear it in his voice.

“No” Shaw said immediately staring at Root in disbelief watching as her wife let her head fall back, a smaller gasp slipping from her perfectly parted red lips. “It’s…it’s, we’ll be there okay Harold, I have to go” Shaw said suddenly hanging up the phone and dropping it on the bed as she suddenly sat up and lurched towards Root. Yanking her arm from between her legs and pushing her back down onto the bed so that Shaw was on top of her.

“You,” Shaw said feeling Root’s wet fingers entwine with hers, as the smirk on Root’s flushed face grew wider. “You’re a little shit.” Shaw said with a smile playing on her face.

Root looked up at her and smiled.

“You look so sexy when you smile” Root said softly and Shaw tried to be annoyed, but couldn’t help the smile on her face, letting it linger as she stared down at Root.

“That was Harold” Shaw said not moving from where she sat on top of Root.

“Mhm” Root said trying to wiggle her hands free from Shaw’s grip, but Shaw kept them firmly held down against the pillow.

“We have to go back to New York” Shaw said and Root looked at her curiously. “It’s Belle’s birthday.”

Root lifted an eyebrow “what does that have to do with us?”

“Harold kept in touch with the foster home she’s staying at…and she asked for us, for her birthday.”

A small smile appeared on Root’s face and Shaw rolled her eyes.

“You didn’t tell him that we were in…”

“No.” Shaw said. “I told him we’d be there though.”

“I didn’t really hear you say much” Root smirked and Shaw pressed down on Root harder.

“Mm and whose fault was that?”

“Um well” Root said with a small giggle as Shaw released one of Root’s hands, as she grabbed Root’s neck and pushed her head to the side leaning down to kiss it. “Well it could be yours, your lack of self control.” Root said and Shaw bit her lightly.

“ _My_ lack of self control?” Shaw asked and Root laughed.

“You could have acted normal” Root said with a smirk as she looked at Shaw, their dark eyes meeting.

“I would love for you to tell me more” Shaw said sarcastically as she drew back off Root “but we gotta go.”

Root watched as Shaw climbed off the bed running a hand through her dark hair as she wandered across the room.

“Where are you going?” Root asked.

“Shower” Shaw replied and glanced back at Root “I smell like a hangover and sex.”

“Was that an invitation?” Root smirked and Shaw laughed.

“No.”

“Can I come anyway?” Root asked sitting up and Shaw just slammed the bathroom door shut behind her.

*

Root was restless on the plane. Shaw stared at her, watching without saying anything as Root adjusted her position several times, before letting out a frustrated sigh.

“What?” Shaw asked arching an eyebrow, Root looked at her.

“Nothing.” Root said her dark eyes wide and Shaw continued staring at her. “Okay so maybe not nothing”

Shaw smirked a little. “Please, tell me” she said with a fake politeness that almost made Root smile.

“You kind of…interrupted earlier” Root said lowering her voice a little and Shaw frowned, then glanced down at Root’s tightly crossed legs, where her hand was wedged between them and smirked.

“That was hours ago” Shaw said looking back up at Root.

“Yeah well, I’m not satisfied.” Root said “And it’s…uncomfortable.”

“You didn’t join me in the shower, so I figured you were…” Shaw grinned and Root just elbowed her in the ribs.

“What do you want me to do about it?” Shaw asked sarcastically “Get a blanket? Shove my hand down there right now?”

“Sam” Root said glancing around making sure no one was listening to their conversation, but everyone had headphones on, or was asleep.

“I am _not_ going into those tiny toilets with you” Shaw said and Root just looked at her. “They’re disgusting and _small_ ” Shaw said and Root stuck her bottom lip out.

“You’re small” Root said and Shaw rolled her eyes.

“No.”

“I’ll make lasagne” Root lifted an eyebrow and Shaw smirked.

“What kind of deal is that?”

“A normal people one” Root said with a smile.

“Get up” Shaw said shaking her head and Root just grinned. “But you’re making dinner for a month.” Shaw added as she followed Root down the aisle to the toilet.

Root went in first and rolled her eyes, letting out a soft groan before stepping in after her.

“I cannot believe you” Shaw said sliding the lock shut “How is this supposed to work?”

“Usually you put your fingers in me and don’t stop until I scream” Root smirked and Shaw leaned against the wall, their legs touching from lack of space.

“You can’t scream” Shaw said.

“So choke me” Root smirked and Shaw just rolled her eyes.

“I’m gonna kill you, does that work?”

“Can I have that orgasm first or are you gonna make me wait again?” Root smirked and Shaw just grabbed Root by the jacket and pulled their bodies together, kissing her firmly. Root unbuttoned her jeans and tugged them down. Shaw’s hands held Root’s waist lightly then suddenly there was a shudder as the plane hit turbulence, Shaw’s hand shot out to steady herself on the wall and she grinned against Root’s lips.

“Oh man” she mumbled and Root just laughed lightly.

“Can I say something?” Root said as Shaw leaned against her, biting her neck lightly waiting for the turbulence to ease off.

“Mhm” Shaw said letting a finger trace over Root’s hipbone.

“I’m really glad I have you” Root said. Shaw lifted her head a little so their eyes met, her nose grazing against Root’s cheek a little.

“To fulfil your untimely orgasm needs?” Shaw asked her voice low, a smile tugging at the corners of her mouth.

“Yeah” Root said “and just in general, everything is better with you.”

Shaw looked at Root with a small vaguely amused smile. “Do you ever think about when we first started seeing each other?” Shaw asked her finger tracing the edge of Root’s underwear line “and I could barely stand you, but you’d cover yourself in whiskey and make me lick it off, and when I’d try to talk you’d point a knife at my throat…”

“That was fun” Root said with a smirk as Shaw’s fingers slowly got closer to the wet patch between Root’s legs.

“Yeah, and then you look at us now” Shaw said slipping a finger into Root’s panties through the leg hole. “And you say shit like that, right before I finger you in the toilet on an airplane.”

“People change” Root said with a small gasp as she felt Shaw inside her.

Shaw moved her fingers inside Root faster, leaning back against the wall and letting Root’s body weight fall on her. Root’s lips rested on Shaw’s shoulder, using it to muffle any sound that was accidentally tumbling from her mouth before she could catch it.

Suddenly someone tapped on the door and Shaw smirked glancing at Root.

“We’re gonna have to do this the fast way” Shaw said adjusting her hand, pulling her fingers from Root and pressing her thumb to Root’s clit.

It barely took more than a minute for Shaw to get Root over the edge, her breathing quickened, Shaw could feel each hot and heavy breath down her neck as Root restrained from making any sound. Her final release being nothing more than a lengthy drawn out “fuuuck” as she lightly bit down on Shaw’s shoulder, her heart beating fast in her chest, feeling it from her fingertips to the veins in her neck. Shaw let her stay there just for a moment, one hand on Shaw’s waist, the other pressed against the wall behind Shaw, her lips and nose leaned on Shaw’s shoulder as she tried to even her breathing out.

“Better?” Shaw asked quietly and Root smiled.

“Thank you” she said quietly into Shaw’s neck.

“You must have been desperate if you’re using your manners” Shaw smirked and Root lifted her head to look at Shaw.

“Have you figured out how to get us out?” Root asked with a smirk matching Shaw’s and Shaw stared at her blankly.

“You got us into this, you get us out” Shaw said.

“You’re closer to the door” Root pointed out and Shaw rolled her eyes with a sigh.

“Fine, pull your jeans up” she said grabbing Root’s jeans and tugging them back up, doing up both the zipper and the button for her. “You ready?”

“We’re both just gonna walk out?” Root lifted an eyebrow.

Shaw nodded before quickly running some water on her hands and pushing it through Root’s hairline.

“What are you doing?” Root asked.

“Since you’re so good at acting” Shaw said with a smirk pulling out her own hair tie and tying Root’s hair into a loose ponytail. “Grab a paper towel and hold it to your mouth.” Shaw said and Root did what she was told, closely watching as Shaw slid the door to unlock and carefully edged it open. Root heard the small groan escape her lips, realising that there must be at least one person out there waiting. Shaw stepped out and held a hand out for Root, that almost made her frown in confusion until she realised what Shaw was trying to do. Holding the paper towel to her mouth she took Shaw’s hand with her free one and stepped out of the toilet, stopping to sway a little.

Shaw stared at the guy who was waiting, who looked between both of the women with a frown.

“I’d give that one a minute” Shaw said to him and nodded at the toilet. “Someone had too much to drink at her Hens last night.”

The man automatically screwed up his face and stepped out of the way to let them through, Shaw pulled Root by the hand all the way back to their seats.

“My hens? Really?” Root asked as they sat back down and Shaw smirked.

“If he knew we were married he’d have known there was no way you were throwing up in there” Shaw said and Root rolled her eyes.

“Well he’s probably doing something else relatively R rated in there now too, after seeing you” Root said sitting back in her hair, letting one of her long legs spill out into the aisle.

“I’m hungover and I’m in a hoody, I highly doubt he’s doing anything but taking a dump” Shaw said and Root glanced at her.

“But you look hot, even when you’re hungover” Root said “especially with this” she said twirling a strand of Shaw’s wavy loose hair around her finger, “And these” she added trailing a finger down to the curve of Shaw’s breast where she quickly swatted Root’s hand away. “And you have that stupid dark dreamy look in your eye.”

“That’s called sleep deprivation” Shaw said and Root just stared at her lazily leaning her head back against the seat.

“I’m hungry” Root said with a pout.

“We’ll get Shake Shack on the way to Belle’s” Shaw said.

“Actually” Root said glancing at where Shaw’s hand was on the arm rest. “Do you mind taking her for a hot second, I have to do something at home.”

Shaw arched an eyebrow watching Root’s face closely. “Really?” Shaw asked. “You’re gonna do the whole suspicious thing?”

Root smiled “It’s nothing you won’t find out about later.”

“Am I supposed to trust that?” Shaw asked and Root looked at her.

“You trust me don’t you?”

“More than I should” Shaw frowned.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ugh I've missed writing these two daily <3   
> And don't worry... Root's not up to what you think she's up to. I got you ;)
> 
>  
> 
> Let me know what you think! xxx


	34. Better Than Aspirin

Shaw felt strange without having Root by her side, it was an annoying realisation for her, how accustomed she now was to having Root around her all the time. She caught herself checking her phone at least three times as she walked towards the foster care centre, and once more before she pushed the door open. Goddamn it, she thought shoving her phone back into her pocket. It had barely been an hour. Root said she was going back to the house, so why bother worrying. Shaw sighed loudly as the door swung open and a woman with a child in her arms and another two at her feet looked up at Shaw.

“Hey” Shaw said glancing at the children and hearing the sound volumes inside, hoping that going in wasn’t something she’d have to do. Wrong.

“Come in” the woman smiled “You must be Sameen.”

“And you must be?” Shaw asked following the woman through the hallway, trying not to stand on any stray toys.

“In charge” the woman said with a laugh before turning around and holding out her free hand. “Marie, Belle’s out the back, your friend made all the arrangements, just have her back by six, she’s been waiting to see you all week.”

Shaw smiled slightly and dodged several children as she walked through to the next room, her eyes scanning the children when suddenly she felt a tap on her back. Spinning around she saw Belle behind her.

“Hey you” she said and Belle just grinned.

“You’re supposed to say happy birthday.” Belle said and Shaw rolled her eyes.

“That was coming next.”

“Let’s go” Belle said and took Shaw’s hand pulling her towards the door.

“You’re in charge?” Shaw asked.

“It’s _my_ birthday, Sammy” Belle said. “Where’s Bear?”

Shaw frowned “oh, uh, I’ll get Root to bring him” she said pulling out her phone to text Root.

“Who’s Root?” Belle asked as they walked down the road.

“You remember, the tall, pretty, noodle who followed us around last time?” Shaw said absentmindedly as the flicked a message to her wife to get the dog.

“You mean your wife?” Belle giggled and Shaw just glanced at her.

“That very one” Shaw said and Belle grinned.

“Why’d you call her a noodle?”

Shaw was about to answer when suddenly Belle squealed with happiness and let go of Shaw’s hand dashing forward to where Bear was sitting at Root’s feet just up the road.

“How did you…” Shaw asked with a confused look spreading across her face as she looked between Bear and Root.

“I figured you’d want to see him” Root smirked “And she would too.” Root added glancing at Belle. “Happy birthday, cutie” Root said to her and Belle looked up with a wide smile as Bear licked her face.

“Did you dress her?” Root asked watching Belle and Shaw frowned.

“No” she answered glancing at Belle, noticing she was in black jeans and boots, with a grey hoodie on under her black jacket.

“Well it’s like you have a miniature version” Root smirked and glanced at Shaw. “She smiles more though.”

“Hey” Shaw said looking at Root before letting a smile stretch across her face, catching Root’s eyes flutter as she did. “You told me not to, remember.”

“It needs a warning sign” Root said glancing down at Belle.

“Hey Root” Belle said “Can you pull my tooth out?”

Root glanced over at Shaw who just smirked. “Oh this is gonna be _fun_ hungover.”

*

For a new six year old Belle didn’t have a particularly large wish list. She wanted cake, and a balloon, and to hold Bear’s leash while she walked along eating an ice cream. She also wanted Root to dress up as a fairy.

“But you’d be such a pretty fairy” Belle whined when Root refused.

“Why can’t Sam do it?” Root asked and Belle just looked at Shaw then back at Root.

“You look like an elf, so you have to be the fairy.”

“Can’t argue with that” Shaw had said with a smirk.

So there they sat, as Belle burned off some of her sugar energy running around a playground, Root dressed as a fairy, wings, glitter, and all, holding Bear’s leash while Shaw tried not to lose her shit.

“This is not okay” Root growled softly folding her arms across her chest as she watched Belle.

“I mean…it’s definitely something” Shaw said trying to bite back a smile as she stared at Root, unable to look anywhere else.

“I can see at least five children who are seconds away from approaching me, probably ready to tell me their problems and make me vaporise their brothers” Root said with a huff and Shaw just laughed.

“What kind of fairy vaporises?” Shaw asked and Root hit her hard across the arm.

“I’m going to make you suffer later” Root said and Shaw lifted an eyebrow.

“This is not my fault.” Shaw said taking a sip from her coffee.

“It’s so your fault” Root argued snatching Shaw’s coffee from her and taking a long sip, as Shaw frowned. “It’s like my worst nightmare, horribly hungover and covered in glitter.”

“That’s how most people wake up in Vegas” Shaw grinned and Root hit her again.

“I could choke you to death with the strap of this wing” Root said and Shaw just grinned.

“Fairy murders innocent civilian in New York” Shaw said as she looked over at Belle.

“There’s nothing innocent about you” Root said and Shaw automatically looked back at her.

“I know you’re working through some issues right now, but you gotta stop projecting” Shaw said with a smirk as she held up her hands in fake surrender and Root just stared at her, with a fixated look in her dark eyes.

“Can I punch you?” Root asked and Shaw laughed again.

“Go for it” Shaw said with a smirk as she turned her arm towards Root “it’s not going to dull my amusement.”

Root lifted her hand, balling her fingers up into her palm when suddenly Belle yelled.

“No stop!” Belle came running over to Shaw and put both her hands over Shaw’s arm. “You’re a fairy, you can’t punch her.”

“But she’s being mean to me.” Root said staring at Belle.

“Maybe because you didn’t give her a wish.” Belle said and Root stared at Shaw for help but Shaw just lifted both eyebrows.

“I get a wish?” Shaw asked. “On your birthday?”

“Mhm.” Belle said “What is it?”

Shaw looked at Root a smile forming on the edge of her lips.

“I want my guns back” Shaw said and Root almost looked relieved.

“Guns?” Belle almost gasped. “Why do you want guns?”

“I like guns.” Shaw said still looking at Root. “I don’t like it when annoying people take them away from me.”

“Well you have to ask for something nice too” Belle said. Shaw looked away from Root towards Belle, looking at her big blue eyes.

“Can I ask for Root to do exactly what I want, for a whole day?”

“You mean like so you can tell her to bring you cake and she will?” Belle asked tipping her head to the side.

“Yeah, something like that” Shaw said with a smirk looking at Root who was glaring at her tight lipped.

“That’s smart Sammy,” Belle said “because then you can get lots of nice things from her.”

“Mhm” Shaw smirked and Root just rolled her eyes.

“You’re installing bad habits, Sameen” Root muttered.

“Installing?” Shaw repeated. “She’s a kid, not a machine.”

Root just looked away with a sigh and Belle grinned.

“You gotta do what she says for a day, Noodle” Belle said to Root and Shaw grinned. “But not today, because you’re doing what I say.”

“Yeah cupcake” Root said and tucked a strand of Belle’s loose hair behind her ear. “I’m all yours, what next?”

Shaw stared at Root who purposefully ignored her knowing that for any given day in the near future Shaw was gonna have the upper hand, and there was nothing she could do about it. Shaw smirked, then watched how carefully Root touched Belle’s cheek, the softness in her eyes as she looked at the kid. There was a fierce protection behind there too, Shaw knew that, she knew because it was the same way Root looked at her, obviously with a lot more intensity, but the base of it was there. Then she looked at the reality, of the glittery fairy she was sitting next to who was being dragged to play with the tiny little girl dressed in black. She laughed and stroked Bear’s ears.

“What is my life” she mumbled to Bear.

*

“I do not understand children” Root said collapsing down next to Shaw on a park bench, with a half eaten stick of cotton candy as they watched Belle drive a boat almost the same size as her around the lake, Bear sitting next to her.

“They eat sugar and ask a lot of questions” Shaw said “What’s to get?”

Root just looked at her, and Shaw glanced over with a smile.

“You have glitter all over your face” Shaw said and Root just shrugged pulling off some of the pink cotton candy and shoving it into her mouth.

“My brain hurts” Root mumbled.

“This image right here” Shaw said framing Root with her hands as she continued to stuff Belle’s cotton candy in her mouth, glitter residue on her face, deeply hungover. “Is the only one I ever need.”

Root looked at her sideways. “Jackass.”

“I’m not being mean” Shaw said with a smirk letting her hands fall back down to her lap, one of them landing lightly on Root’s leg. “You look fucking cute, and absolutely hysterical at the same time.”

“I haven’t slept” Root groaned lightly.

“Neither have I”

“But you’re not covered in glitter” Root pouted.

“It’s not my fault the kid thinks you look more elfin than me” Shaw said a finger absentmindedly drawing a line back and forward across Root’s thigh. Root glanced down at it, without Shaw noticing, watching her finger and trying not to smile.

“This morning I was in Vegas having really great sex, now, suddenly I’m sitting in Central Park covered in glitter, with cotton candy and a thumping headache, and my wife seems to be getting off incredibly lightly here” Root summarised and Shaw smirked.

“I have aspirin” Shaw offered and Root rolled her eyes. “What do you want, me to kiss it better?” Shaw asked jokingly and Root gazed at her.

“Is that up for offer?” Root asked and Shaw stared at her for several seconds before leaning in and giving her a kiss, letting it linger just long enough for her to taste the sugar on Root’s lips, before pulling away. Root’s dark eyes looking at her dreamily, and almost slightly taken back.

Shaw arched an eyebrow as if to say _better now?_ One of Root’s hands came up to her mouth, a finger dragging across her lips and a small smile appearing.

“Okay,” Root said quietly “that kind of made me feel like I was sixteen years old.”

“Ugh, shut up weirdo” Shaw said rolling her eyes as she leaned back on the bench and folded her arms, looking over at Belle.

“Better than aspirin though” Root said with a smirk.

“I know.” Shaw replied.

*

“I don’t think this glitter is ever going to come off” Root groaned as they walked down the street. Shaw smirked.

“As long as it doesn’t get on me” she said and Root looked at her.

“Oh it’s gonna get on you, Sameen, don’t worry” Root said and Shaw went to turn the corner towards Root’s apartment.

“Wait not that way” Root said grabbing Shaw’s arm. Shaw turned to Root and frowned.

“I want to go home before I fall asleep on the road” Shaw said and Root smiled a little.

“Yeah but,” Root said and Shaw just arched an eyebrow.

“But what?”

“Just…trust me” Root said and Shaw let out an exhausted sigh.

“Root” she groaned.

“At least try and be enthusiastic, Sam” Root said as she hailed them a cab.

“When is that something I ever do?” Shaw asked pushing Root out of the way and collapsing into the backseat of the cab first, followed by Bear. Root got in after her and handed the driver a little piece of paper with an address on it that Shaw couldn’t make out.

“If there’s no bed where we’re going you’re getting a kick up the ass” Shaw mumbled leaning her head back against the seat and yawning.

Root’s knee bumped against hers and she smiled as she watched Shaw.

“When have I ever led you astray?”

“You really want me to answer that?” Shaw asked with a small smirk and Root rolled her eyes, leaning forward and pulling a perfectly folded hood and pair of zip ties from her back pocket. Shaw arched an eyebrow.

“Oh god.” she muttered. “What have you done?”

Root just grinned.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh man, what's Root up to now?!
> 
> Updating daily seems to be an endless struggle, but I'm trying my best to get these up as often as I can! Thank you for sticking with me, these two are such a good time to write.  
> xxx


	35. Welcome Home

“You know,” Shaw said “this is a lot more fun when it’s you in a hood and zip ties.”

“Have you never heard of taking turns, Sameen” Root said as she helped Shaw out from the cab and kicked the door shut with her foot.

“Not my area of expertise” Shaw said from underneath the hood, rotating her wrists around the zip ties, trying to figure out whether she should just break free of them or not, thinking it might land her in more trouble than what it’s worth. Although she loved it when she did something Root didn’t want her to, the look on her face was always so priceless.

Nothing could ever keep Sameen Shaw tied up, unless she wanted to be.

“Steps” Root said taking Shaw by the elbows and helping her up the short flight of stairs.

“I know how to walk up stairs, Root” Shaw snapped stopping halfway up until Root unarmed her and Shaw continued without her help.

“Do you know where the wall is too, or do you want me to warn you before you walk into it?” Root asked sarcastically and Shaw rolled her eyes under the hood.

“Seriously, where are we?” Shaw asked. “Is this like some kind of sex dungeon?”

“You go _down_ to a sex dungeon Sam, not up” Root smirked and Shaw just groaned.

Shaw heard the sound of a door and then felt Root’s hand on her arm, pulling her inside, the door swinging shut behind them. Shaw wriggled her wrists out of the zip ties and tucked it into the back pocket of her jeans, before folding her arms.

“Can you take the hood off now?” Shaw asked and heard Root pause, noticing Shaw’s free hands.

“Pretty sure you can do that yourself, sweetie” Root rolled her eyes and Shaw yanked the hood off, the light making her squint as she glanced around the living room she was standing it.

The first thing she noticed was the black couch, with a grey blanket tossed over it. There was a glass coffee table in front of it, above the fireplace was a huge flat screen TV, a giant black wooden bookcase stretched towards the ceiling with its shelves near full. Shaw’s eyes scanned the room and came to rest on the pool table that was in the far corner, before glancing back at Root.

“Okay, whose house are we in?” Shaw asked arching an eyebrow and Root just smiled.

“Don’t you recognise it?” Root asked and Shaw looked around again, suddenly noticing the art, two framed sketches of guns pointed at each other, the same thing that used to hang in Root’s bathroom was now in this living room. She turned back to Root.

“This is our brownstone?” the shock in Shaw’s voice apparent. Root grinned.

“Do you like it?”

Shaw’s mouth dropped open. “How did you…”

“Not telling” Root said with a smirk as she walked into the living room and leaned against the back of their black sofa.

“You have to” Shaw demanded and Root just watched her with an amused look on her face.

“Or else what, baby?”

“You don’t wanna find out.” Shaw said stepping towards Root so their knees touched.

Root rolled her eyes with a sigh. “You don’t think our little trip to the west coast was without reason?” she said and Shaw tilted her head. “I had to get you out of the house, so it could be furnished.” Root said with a shrug and a half smile rolled across Shaw’s face.

“I should have known.” Shaw said.

“You like it?” Root smiled and Shaw glanced at the room before letting her eyes rest back on Root, looking at her sitting in on the back of the couch in the living room she had somehow managed to get just right. Their living room. Root was sitting in _their_ living room.

“It’s perfect.” Shaw said and Root immediately looked happy.

“Come with me,” Root said standing up and grabbing Shaw’s hand, “I want to show you the kitchen” she said towing Shaw into the next room. “I had the old counters removed,” she said and glanced at Shaw “I didn’t think they were strong enough for us.”

Shaw lifted an eyebrow as she looked around the kitchen, black benches with white marble tops. She smirked and pulled herself up onto one.

“Yeah these feel pretty solid” she said with a smirk and Root just smirked.

“I stocked the pantry, the fridge, and of course” Root said pulling open some cabinet doors “the liquor cabinet, but I might vomit if I have another drink in the next 48 hours.”

Shaw just stared at Root.

“Oh but you’re so much more fun when you’re drunk” Shaw smirked and Root walked over to her, putting her hands either side of where Shaw was sitting on the counter, but didn’t say anything.

“What, no comeback?” Shaw asked, eye to eye with Root.

“We have a house” Root just said softly and Shaw looked at her.

“And it was decorated by an reformed killer who likes black” Shaw smirked and Root smiled.

“Her wife likes black too, and it hides blood stains better.” Root said and Shaw rolled her eyes with a smile.

“Cute.” Shaw said.

“You wanna see the artillery or the bedroom next?” Root asked and Shaw raised an eyebrow.

“Guns, then the sex lounge” Shaw said and Root stared at her.

“It’s _not_ a sex lounge” Root told her and Shaw slipped off the counter and smirked.

“I’ll believe that when I see it.”

Root led her into the hallway and stopped by the side of the staircase, pressing on it with her hand a door opening up.

“Secret cupboard under the stairs?” Shaw smirked “now that’s cool.”

“We might be lethal killers but we’re going to be civilised enough to keep our guns out of sight” Root said and Shaw stuck her head in glancing around at all their weapons, the bigger guns hanging on the wall, and shelves for everything else.

“There’s house rules now?” Shaw smirked and Root slid the door shut again, before twirling around the staircase banister and starting to go upstairs.

“That’s the only one I’ve got” Root said before adding “so far.”

Shaw followed Root upstairs wondering briefly what she had put behind all of the doors, before Root led her into their bedroom. She almost held her breath before she walked in, Root had somehow definitely hit the mark with the rest of the house, but this, this could go either way.

But as she walked in, she was almost shocked at how minimal and _normal_ it looked. There was no saltire cross, no heavy dark curtains or boxes of sex toys.

There was a large bed in the middle, covered in natural tones, beiges, whites, blacks, two beside tables from Root’s old place. It looked…familiar. And without hesitation, Shaw brushed past Root, pulling her jacket off and launching onto the chair in the corner before climbing on to the bed and letting out a sigh of relief, a smile stretching across her face.

“To tell you the truth Sam” Root said following Shaw and climbing onto the bed. “I have no idea what normal people do with these rooms, and I kinda liked our old setup.”

Root flopped down next to Shaw turning her head to the side so she could look at her wife.

“Same” Shaw said staring up at the ceiling. “This is good.” Then suddenly she sat up and glanced at both the nightstands before looking back at Root.

“Where’s your lava lamp?” Shaw asked and Root arched an eyebrow.

“You hated that thing so I didn’t put it in here” Root said and Shaw just stared at her.

“You don’t sleep well without it.” Shaw reminded her and Root bit her lip.

“It’s fine, you hate it so…”

“Root” Shaw said rolling her eyes. “As long as it’s on your side.”

*

“Wake up” Shaw said climbing back onto the bed with a bowl of cornflakes and staring at Root, who was still peacefully asleep draped across most of the bed in one of Shaw’s old Marine t-shirts and a pair of her boxers.

Root mumbled something lightly and Shaw poked her with a toe.

“Up” Shaw said through a mouthful of cornflakes.

“No” Root protested sleepily and Shaw rolled her eyes.

“Bear” Shaw called out and Root suddenly rolled over, her eyes open.

“Awake, awake, awake” she said groggily and looked at Shaw before yawning.

Shaw smirked. “Good because I’d hate to wake Bear up.”

Root glared at her. “What do you want?”

“I do believe a fairy gave me a wish” Shaw smirked and Root immediately groaned.

“That wasn’t real” she murmured burying her face back into a pillow.

“Oh it was” Shaw grinned “And I’m cashing in.”

“Not today” Root mumbled her eyes starting to shut again. Shaw narrowed her eyes before climbing on top of Root, and sitting on her, still eating her cornflakes.

“I don’t think that’s how it works” Shaw said “And if I remember correctly, you have to do what I say, for a whole day.”

“No one heard you say that” Root said with a lazy smile and Shaw smirked.

“I beg to differ” Shaw smirked and set her bowl down. “Now get up.” Shaw said leaning down so her face was just above Root’s. “Your _wife_ wants you.”

“Wants me?” Root smirked looking up at Shaw with dark sleepy eyes. Shaw noticed a faint glitter trail still smudged across her cheek and decided not to mention it.

“Not only do we have every room in this house to christen, but I’m also going to make you do some morally regrettable things” Shaw said with a smirk before kissing the end of Root’s nose.

“I would kill you if I didn’t love you so much” Root grumbled and Shaw smiled, wide enough to make Root look away, pink flushing through her cheeks. _That stupid smile,_ she thought.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So...what are you thinking? Disgustingly cute?  
> And what do you think Shaw should make Root do? ;)
> 
> #cantstopwontstop


	36. Do As I Say

There was a knock on the front door. Both Root and Shaw immediately froze as the sound echoed down the hallway, to where they were in the kitchen. Root looked over her shoulder at Shaw.

“Ignore it.” Shaw said and pointed at the counter where Root was making pancakes.

“Are you sure?” Root asked wiping her hands on the apron she was wearing, well, it was the only thing that she was wearing at Shaw’s adamant request for her to make pancakes naked.

 _“I don’t even think you’re hungry”_ Root had said.

 _“Regardless,”_ Shaw had said with a shrug. _“Take your clothes off.”_

Shaw just stared at Root and arched an eyebrow.

“You’re gonna answer the door like that then?” she asked and Root rolled her eyes.

“Take off your sweater” Root said holding her hand out, using the other hand to untie the apron and let it drop to the floor.

Shaw stared at her for a moment, her eyes running down Root’s body before she ducked out of her sweater and tossed it to Root.

Root pulled it on and tugged it down so it came down to mid thigh, before glancing back at Shaw with a smirk.

“Do you think they’ll know I don’t have underwear on?” Root asked and Shaw rolled her eyes.

“I could just get it” Shaw said but Root was already going down the hallway. Shaw heard Root open the door, followed by voices she couldn’t recognise saying something she couldn’t quite make out. Shaw’s instinct was to reach for her gun, her wife being at the door mostly naked and all. But suddenly Root’s voice just called out.

“Hey sweetie, can you come here for a minute?”

Shaw frowned a little before slipping off the bar stool and slowly making her way down the hall. Glancing around Root as she got closer to the door and seeing two happy smiling strangers standing there. Shaw glanced at Root before looking at them again.

“This is Sarah and Paul” Root said “They live next door.”

“Neighbours” Shaw mumbled a little before turning back to the strangers with a pleasant but entirely fake, although not completely obvious, smile stretching across her face.

“Charmed.” Shaw said and felt Root’s arm slip around her waist.

“We were just asking…” the woman paused and glanced at Root. “Sorry I didn’t get your name?”

“Samantha” Root said with a light smile “And this is my wife, Sam.”

“Samantha and Sam” Paul said with a laugh “Ain’t that something.”

“Only reason I married her” Shaw said and everyone laughed, but Shaw felt Root’s fingers dig in at her hip.

“I was just asking Samantha if you two wanted to come over for dinner tonight?” Sarah asked and Shaw opened to her mouth immediately to refuse but Root beat her to it.

“We’d love to” Root said and looked at Shaw, who shot murderous daggers through her fake smile.

“Perfect” Sarah clapped her hands together in excitement. “Come by at 7, you two seem like a lot of fun.”

“You don’t know the half of it” Shaw said the smile dropping from her face, letting her arm slide around Root’s waist, her fingers catching the edge of the sweater slowly starting to drag it upwards.

Root laughed as a distraction while she slapped Shaw’s hand away, before she waved the neighbours off and shut the door.

“Why did you say yes?” Shaw automatically growled pinning Root against the door with her forearm barring Root’s chest.

Root just smirked. “They’re our neighbours.”

“So?” Shaw asked in bewilderment and Root just rolled her eyes.

“We have to seem normal.”

“We don’t have to seem anything.” Shaw said and Root just looked at her.

“I doubt they’ll want us back once they’ve heard us having sex anyway” Root assured her and Shaw raised her eyebrows.

“If we do it now do you think they’ll cancel?” Shaw asked and Root just laughed.

“It’s just dinner, Sam.” Root said grabbing Shaw by the hips and pulling her close, despite the fact Shaw still had her pinned against the door.

“Just dinner” Shaw repeated “That’s what you said the first time we had sex, and now look what’s happened.”

Root just grinned. “I’m touched you remember my words, but we don’t have to marry them, so can you unhand me now?”

“I’m in charge, remember?” Shaw said her face close to Root’s.

“How could I possibly forget” Root said with a smirk.

“Get your ass back to the kitchen” Shaw said taking a step away from Root and she rolled her eyes before obediently walking back.

“I don’t know how much I like this role-play” Root called over her shoulder and Shaw smirked.

“Are you missing your fairy costume?” Shaw asked and Root groaned.

“Don’t talk about that.”

“Why?” Shaw said with a smirk sitting back down in the kitchen and watching Root’s face closely. “Does all that glitter make you uncomfortable?”

Root spun around to look at her. “You know, now that our _normal_ people game is over, I could just taser you.”

“And I could stab you with one of those knives behind you” Shaw smirked “But I’m not going to do that”

“Because we’re rationale adults?” Root asked and Shaw just laughed.

“Because I need you in one piece” Shaw said with a smirk.

*

“I don’t support this.” Root said as Shaw climbed onto the front of her motorbike.

“Yeah well you don’t have to” Shaw smirked. “And also, this doesn’t count as the ride I won off you at New Years”

“Yes it does” Root said protectively over her bike.

“Don’t argue with me” Shaw smirked and Root just groaned, pulling her helmet on and climbing onto the back, folding her arms, refusing to put them around Shaw.

“I can’t believe this is all because of a child.” Root said and Shaw ran her hands over the handlebars with a satisfied look on her face.

“If you were in my position” Shaw said “you’d be making me do far worse things.”

“No” Root said “I would handcuff you to the bed and have sex with you all day but every time you were close to an orgasm I’d stop.”

“Really?” Shaw asked “That sounds like what you do anyway.”

“Hence why _this_ is so much worse” Root said with a whiny tone in her voice.

“It’s really not” Shaw said “I’m not making you rob a bank.”

“I would prefer that,” Root frowned “than you riding my motorbike.”

“You can get off if you want” Shaw smirked “And pretend it’s not happening.”

“Fuck you” Root said and put her arms around Shaw finally. “I’m not leaving you two alone together.”

“Afraid she might make me moan louder than you can?” Shaw smirked and Root just rolled her eyes, reaching a hand to the throttle and twisting it so the bike roared to life.

It almost frustrated Root how good Shaw was on her bike. It was clear she was being careful too, she went fast, but not as fast as Root. But even if she did feel the tiniest amount of annoyance, it was pretty well wiped away by the fact she found it completely hot. Her wife decked out in leather, riding her motorbike, even though she protested feeling the throttle of the engine underneath her, her arms wrapped around Shaw’s waist. Fuck, she thought.

When Shaw came to a stop she pulled the helmet off and kicked the stand down, climbing off the bike and looking at Root with an eyebrow lifted.

“Alright?” she asked and Root just nodded. “You know the main benefit of having you do as I say, is that when you get annoying I can just tell you to stop.”

“You do that anyway” Root said with a small smile and Shaw looked at her.

“Yeah but then you start being _more_ annoying, which you can’t today.” Shaw said with a smile.

“You like my annoying” Root said putting her helmet down on the seat and walking over to Shaw. “Even if you pretend you don’t.”

“And you like me riding your motorbike, even if you pretend you don’t” Shaw said immediately and Root was speechless.

“It’s not going to be a frequent occurrence though” Root said finally. Suddenly Root looked around at where they were and frowned.

“What are we doing here?”

“We’re gonna steal this rich guys helicopter” Shaw said with a smirk and Root’s mouth fell open. “Did I say we, I meant you” Shaw added and Root just stared at her.

“Why?”

“Denied.” Shaw said and Root continued to look straight at her.

“I used to have hobbies you know” Shaw said.

“Harold told me I was your hobby” Root said and Shaw lifted an eyebrow.

“Did he just?”

Root folded her arms neatly across her chest.

“You know if I suggested this any other day you’d practically pluck one out of the sky for me” Shaw said watching Root’s little stubborn act closely.

“You sound like you’re implying that I would do anything for you, Sameen.” Root said and Shaw smirked.

“Am I wrong?” Shaw asked and Root let out a low sigh, pulling the gun from the back of her jeans and glancing up at the building. “I’ll meet you on the roof.” Shaw said with a smirk.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oh no....normal people neighbours!
> 
> thank you all for reading, I'm trying my best to keep updating as frequently as I can!  
> stay tuned (....angst is on the way :P )
> 
> xx


	37. Sex and Arguing

“Do we really have to do this?” Shaw asked as she pulled on a fresh shirt standing in their bedroom, Root drying her hair with a towel in the doorway. Both of them fresh out of christening the shower. “I haven’t thought about murder once today.”

Root smirked. “That’s got to be a new record.”

“Yeah well it was made easy being able to shut you up mid sentence.” Shaw said and sat on the end of the bed.

“Sam, don’t worry, it’s just food with Paul and Margaret” Root said.

“I thought you said her name was Sarah?” Shaw asked and Root shrugged.

“Whatever.” she said “we only have to do this once, let them know we aren’t crazy…”

“So basically we’re only going there to lie to them until they believe us.”

“They don’t even have to believe us” Root said getting changed. Shaw watched her, a small frown on her face at the thought of having to sit through a _dinner_ with anyone that wasn’t just Root.

“I don’t want to do this.” Shaw said bluntly and Root turned to her.

“Sam you can handle pretty much anything, this is on the smaller scale” Root said and Shaw folded her arms.

“There’s a difference being handling a situation and _not_ wanting to do it” Shaw said and Root rolled her eyes.

“At least there’ll be food.”

“You’re not listening to me.” Shaw said standing up with a sigh and walking out of the room. “I _don’t_ want to do this.” she muttered as she walked down the stairs.

Root didn’t follow her out, which bugged Shaw more than it should have. She walked into the kitchen and sat down on the floor next to Bear and his bowl. Bear looked at her expectantly, cocking his head to the side and Shaw just sighed draping her arms around the dog.

“I think she forgets I’m a sociopath” she mumbled to Bear who answered by sniffing her face with his wet nose.

Root walked into the kitchen a few minutes later and sat down on the floor next to Shaw and Bear. Shaw didn’t look up, the first thing she noticed was how nice Root smelt. It reminded her of Spring.

“Are you mad?” Root asked quietly holding her hand out for Bear to lick.

“Mildly.” Shaw replied.

“By default or because of me?” Root added and Shaw finally turned to look at her. Root’s hair still damp at the ends leaving little wet patches on her clean shirt.

“I don’t know” Shaw said turning her attention back to the dog, feeling Root’s eyes focused on her.

“I do listen to you, Sam” Root said gently.

“Doesn’t always feel like it” Shaw said feeling too tired to control the words from coming out of her mouth.

“Are we fighting?” Root asked leaning her head back against the kitchen counter that she was leaning against.

“Can you feel my hands around your throat?” Shaw replied and Root smirked a little.

“I don’t like arguing with you if it’s making you angry not annoyed” Root said.

“Well,” Shaw said and got to her feet “Maybe if you learned to listen.”

Root just stared at her, the comment stinging more than she had thought it would as Shaw walked out of the room.

“Where are you going?” Root called out.

“Dinner.” Shaw replied. “It’s after 7.”

Root looked at Bear scratching behind his ears before she got to her feet. “We just had fantastic sex, and now we’re arguing…that doesn’t seem right to me.” She said quietly to the dog before kissing his nose. “I’ll fix it, don’t worry.”

“Were you talking to the dog?” Shaw asked waiting by the door for Root.

“You always talk to the dog.” Root said as she walked outside.

“Yeah because he’s the only one that listens” Shaw said with a smirk but Root didn’t see it, as she walked down the steps feeling another sting lash across her heart.

“Can we not do this now?” she asked spinning around to look at Shaw. “I get it, you’re upset, but can we just go and bullshit our neighbours before we tear each others hair out?”

Shaw just stared at her blankly. “Yeah Root,” Shaw said brushing past Root as she walked across to the neighbours house and started up their steps. “Whatever you say.”

Root felt her jaw clench as she watched Shaw acting so nonchalant, it was something she should have been used to. This was the way Shaw was built. But it hadn’t happened for so long…and now, after everything, it felt different. And different hurt a little more than Root was ready for.

“Sameen,” she said softly the smallest tremor in her voice almost begging Shaw to stop. Shaw turned around halfway up the steps and stared at Root, who was standing in the middle of the sidewalk looking like an abandoned puppy.

“What?”

“I’ll…I’ll make it up to you later” Root said and Shaw just rolled her eyes. Before she had a chance to say anything more the door swung open and Paul stood there grinning.

“I thought I heard you two, come on in” he said stepping back letting the door swing wide open.

Shaw pulled her eyes off Root and walked into the house without a word.

“Make yourselves at home” Sarah said over enthusiastically as they walked into the kitchen. Paul grabbed a beer from the fridge “Anything to drink?” he asked and Shaw gestured at him to pass the beer. Root couldn’t seem to bring herself to look anywhere but at Shaw, suddenly wishing they were at home, alone, so she could just talk to her. Or listen. Or whatever it was, to make this stupid feeling stop.

“So tell me,” Sarah said moving busily around the kitchen “What do you two do?”

“We’re gonna talk about work?” Shaw asked taking a sip of beer “That’s so boring.”

Sarah laughed.

“Let’s talk about marriage” Root said from beside her and Shaw tried not to roll her eyes. “How did you meet?” Root asked and Shaw almost groaned.

*

By the time any food was ready and they made it to the table Shaw was near ready to knock all of them unconscious and walk as far as she needed to get a burger.

She had tuned out of the conversation a long time ago, and was now at the point where she felt drowsily uncomfortable. Slipping her phone from her pocket she sent a text under the table without anyone noticing.

Root seemed unsettled, it was only the slightest differences in her mannerisms that gave her away. Only things that Shaw noticed, to anyone else she seemed perfectly fine. But Shaw felt Root’s lingering looks, the feel of her eyes staring at Shaw wasn’t filled with quite the same intensity as usual, it almost felt like a desperation. Like a _please look at me, I’m sorry_.

That had barely been an argument about anything, that’s what bothered Shaw. Although it was strange in general the feeling of not being at ease with the person beside her. The tension was almost making this already horrible situation worse than it was.

They had barely spoken to each other since they had arrived. They were talking yes, but hardly to each other.

Suddenly the sound of Shaw’s phone ringing broke the silence. Root immediately looked at Shaw with a frown on her face as Shaw pulled out her phone.

“Work, sorry” Shaw said getting up from the table without looking at Root and slipping out of the room to answer her phone.

“I got your message” Reese’s voice said on the other end of the line as Shaw picked up the call. “Come outside.” he said and Shaw slipped out the front door and saw Reese standing on the steps to her house. He turned around at the sound of the door shutting behind her and frowned.

“I thought you lived here” he said walking over to her.

“Yeah that’s why I texted” Shaw said rolling her eyes.

“Because you moved?” Reese asked and she almost thumped him.

“How did you get here so fast?” Shaw asked lifting an eyebrow.

“Harold told me to stick around you tonight” Reese said with a shrug.

“Why?” Shaw frowned “Did my number come up?”

“A little bird told him” Reese said and she frowned. “Did you murder your wife?”

“What? No.” Shaw said and folded her arms.

“Are you alright?” Reese asked her, a genuine concern in his voice.

“I don’t know” Shaw said with a shrug, frowning as she looked down the empty street.

“You don’t look…” Reese said but he stopped halfway through his sentence as Shaw looked back at him.

“I don’t look what?” she snapped.

“You seem agitated” he said.

Shaw sighed loudly. “I don’t know what’s wrong, okay” Shaw said and ran a hand through her hair shaking her head. “I just thought she knew not to put me in social situations, like ever.”

Reese raised an eyebrow. “So that’s what this is about.”

Shaw stared at him. “It’s not…just that.”

Reese looked at her expectantly. “Do you want to tell me, or do you want to get a drink and tell me?”

“I can’t just not go back in.” Shaw said.

“Why not?” Reese shrugged and Shaw looked at the house behind her, knowing Root was in there. “If you don’t want to be in there, then don’t be in there.”

“That’s not how the world works” Shaw said.

“It is for us, Shaw” Reese said and she looked at him with a groan.

“That’s not even my name anymore technically.”

“It’s always gonna be your name” Reese said. “Now do you want to get that drink or not?”

Shaw knew as she glanced back at the house it was probably going to be a regrettable decision, but right at that moment she didn’t care. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thoughts?? feelings?


	38. Exhaustion and Agony

“So,” Reese asked as they walked back through the streets of Manhattan after sitting in a practically empty bar for an hour. “Do you feel better?”

Shaw glanced at him and rolled her eyes. “Not really.”

“Is she going to try and kill you when you get home?” Reese asked with a smirk and Shaw just frowned.

“Probably.” Shaw said then thought about it. “Actually it might be more of a silent rage.”

“That seems worse” Reese said with a frown and Shaw shrugged.

“I probably shouldn’t have left.” she said and kicked a stone with her boot, so hard that it went flying out onto the road.

“Marriage is pretty claustrophobic, what you did is understandable” Reese said and somehow it didn’t make Shaw feel any less guilty.

“It’s not her,” Shaw tried to defend her. “It’s just…I’m not cut for this shit, and amongst all this insanity of the past few months I think she’s forgotten that.”

“So talk to her” Reese said. “She is your wife.”

“But she doesn’t _listen_ ” Shaw frowned “She’ll just climb onto my lap and assume it’ll be solved with sex.”

Reese smirked. “And it’s not?”

“Shut up” Shaw groaned and punched him in the shoulder.

“Seriously, Shaw” Reese said. “Just because you’re married doesn’t mean you have to give up who you are, it’s easy to forget that.”

“Coming from the marriage expert” Shaw smirked and Reese just looked at her, coming to a stop outside her house.

“If you need another escape, I’m here” he said and Shaw rolled her eyes.

“I don’t need you.” she said staring up at the house but when she turned around he was gone. Letting out a mouthful of air she sat down on the steps. What was she doing. Why did that small amount of distance away from Root actually make her feel better, like she could catch her breath finally. She frowned, realising that she was sitting outside instead of going in. Why couldn’t she go in, why didn’t she _want_ to?

Suddenly the door opened behind her. Root. She didn’t bother turning around.

Root leaned against the door frame, looking at the outline of Shaw sitting on the steps in front of her. Root didn’t know what to say, she didn’t know what she could say that would even start to fill the hundreds of small gaps of silence that were popping up between them.

Everything she thought about saying she would quickly backspace from her mind. _Where were you?_ That wasn’t right. _Are you okay?_ The answer was obvious. _Can we talk about it?_ That was just…too hard, like the words were stuck to her tongue and she couldn’t get them off.

Strangely enough, much to both their shock Shaw was the first to break the silence.

“You know Finch told Reese to keep an eye on me tonight” Shaw said and Root frowned behind her. “Weird that even he knew something was up.”

“Sam, I’m sorry” Root said knowing that apologising to a sociopath really didn’t do much at all.

“Yeah you keep saying that,” Shaw said looking at her hands “but you keep pressing to get your way regardless.”

Root bit down on the inside of her cheeks feeling her heart strings pulling, trying to mask the pain with something else.

“I’m listening.” Root said quietly.

“Are you?” Shaw asked and Root swallowed hard, a lump forming in her throat at Shaw’s tone. “because I don’t think you’ve been listening for a while now, you know when we agreed to try this marriage thing you said nothing would change, and so far everything has changed.”

“Sameen,” Root started but Shaw just rolled her eyes at the interruption and Root quickly stopped, leaving them in silence again.

“It’s like you’ve forgotten that I’m not like everyone else, this whole charade of being normal is manageable as a joke, but at the end of the day that’s not who I am, or who you are for that matter, and I don’t know if maybe this actually what you want, to be normal like” Shaw gestured at their neighbours house, “but I don’t know what to do, Root, if _this_ is the life you want, being like these people, it just doesn’t fit me and pressing me into these situations even when I say no isn’t going to make that change, it’s not like going out and shooting someone.” Shaw said. “I would jump through hoops for you, Root, but I’m not going to make it my life.”

Root felt her eyes sting with tears, she couldn’t stop it. Just as much as she couldn’t stop the tight feeling in her chest that made it feel like her world was about to shatter.

“Sameen,” Root said softly knowing she would have to say something at some point, but finding any kind of word that would fit this moment seemed impossible. Every part of her body was tensed as she fought to hold all the pieces together. It didn’t matter what she said, that much she knew, it wouldn’t make a difference. Not to Shaw. She could apologise until her tongue dried out and it still wouldn’t be okay, not to Root.

“Why didn’t you tell me sooner?” Root asked quietly and Shaw turned slowly to look at her. For the first time in this conversation their eyes met, and Root almost lost the plot immediately. Everything that Shaw had become, that softness that was brushing her hard edges, it was like it had been sucked back into the cupboard and the doors slammed shut. Her eyes were dark, and Root couldn’t see that softness anywhere.

Shaw looked away and Root stared down at the ground.

“I didn’t realise I’d been so…psycho” Root said and Shaw almost laughed at that admittance. “I kind of hate me too right now.” Root said.

“I didn’t say that” Shaw said.

“You didn’t have to” Root replied and Shaw looked at her again.

“Don’t put words in my mouth,” Shaw told her and Root’s jaw clenched.

“What do you want me to say then, Sam?” Root asked through gritted teeth.

“Nothing,” Shaw said and started getting up “I don’t know…I don’t care.”

“You don’t care” Root echoed and Shaw turned around to face Root, still standing halfway down the steps.

“You know what I mean” Shaw said half rolling her eyes.

“Do I?” Root asked.

“Don’t make this about something it’s not” Shaw said. Root ran a hand over her face in both exhaustion and agony at the midnight arguments, then pushed their front door open.

“Come inside?” she asked.

Shaw stared at her, she stared at the empty door. The ability to give in and walk into the house sat right there in front of her. That was the easy option, just go in, let it blow over. Whatever. But her gut was telling her something else. Not that she made a habit of listening to her organs, but something inside her twisted at the thought of walking in there…like this anyway.

It stopped from from taking those couple of steps inside, and left her standing on the steps outside, in the middle of the night.

Shaw glanced at Root, concern was starting to spread on her face like a wild fire at the amount of time it was taking Shaw to answer just a simple question. She looked like she was about to fall apart, and for that Shaw hated herself.

“I can’t” she said her voice low as she watched Root’s face.

“Don’t do this” Root begged her and Shaw stepped down the last remaining steps onto the sidewalk and stopped before she walked off.

“I’m going to the apartment” she said there was a slight hesitation in her voice, not knowing exactly why she had stopped to tell Root where she was heading, but it settled her a little.

But as she walked through the streets towards their old apartment block, she realised, maybe this wasn’t how it was anymore. She couldn’t just leave, she couldn’t leave Root like that. What was it going to fix? Stopping in the middle of the street she considered turning back, before shaking her head. Clear your head, she told herself. Alone.

But as she walked into the apartment she shut the door behind her, took one look at the space where everything had changed between them, and turned back towards the wall, leaning her forehead against it and shutting her eyes trying to figure out what it was inside her that she could always feel.

Then there was a light tap on the door, she opened it with one hand, her forehead still pressed to the wall. But as she glanced to the side, that moment of clarity she had been waiting for washed over her.

Root.

“I just want to know” Root said looking at Shaw as she stood up and leaned her back against the wall instead of her face. “Is it space you need, away from me, or is it something else?”

“Either way,” Shaw said and gestured tiredly at Root. “Here you are.”

“Why did you come here?” Root asked softly.

“Can you just… stop asking me questions” Shaw said shutting her eyes and banging her head once against the wall. Root went quiet and walked into the apartment, looking around and feeling that damn twang at her heart strings again.

“You know if we lit this place up I’m sure there’d be blood over pretty much every inch” Root said and Shaw just looked at her.

“This place has definitely had a hell of a time” Shaw said and Root turned to her.

“That’s why you came here, isn’t it?” she asked. “Is this home, to you?”

Shaw just stared at Root, lifting herself off the wall and taking a step towards her.

“No,” Shaw said. “You’re home, Root.”

Root looked at her, a slightly glazed look in her eye, her jaw clenching.

“And this is what I thought would happen,” Shaw said and Root frowned.

“And what exactly is that?” Root asked.

“I can’t be what you want, and it’s hurting you.” Shaw said. Root faltered as she opened her mouth to respond, hung up on the fact Shaw had noticed what it was doing to her. Shaw noticed everything, and she had been oblivious to the point of driving Shaw away.

“What exactly is it that you think I want, Sam?” Root asked. “Because last time I checked you were the only thing on that list.”

Shaw stared at her, expressionless. “You’re pressing me into a mould that don’t fit.”

“I’m sorry” Root said getting sick of hearing those words coming from her own mouth. “I didn’t realise…” her voice trailed off, and she ran a hand through her hair and sighing. “You know I love you for exactly who you are.”

Shaw looked at Root, before moving her eyes off the other woman and walking straight past her into the kitchen, yanking open the fridge door and peering into it with a frown.

“Do you think this is alive?” Shaw asked pulling out a tub of yoghurt and sniffing the inside.

A frown flickered on Root’s face as she watched Shaw so nonchalantly let her brain wander to other things, before she stopped and realised, this is Shaw. And the smile that was itching at Root’s mouth was the smile that always happened when Shaw was being…Shaw.

“I just wouldn’t” Root warned looking at the tub in Shaw’s hands. Shaw ignored her grabbing a spoon from the draw and taking a mouthful, frowning a little before swallowing it, and looking at the used by date on the back.

“It’s fine” Shaw said “I think the artificial strawberry is masking any real issue.”

Root stared at her, watched her eating strawberry yoghurt in the middle of the night, in the middle of an argument, or whatever the hell this was. _I love you_ she thought. _I love you and I can’t live without you._

“Stop looking at me like that,” Shaw said without glancing up at Root.

Root immediately diverted her eyes and looked around the apartment. “Do you…do you think we did this wrong?” Root asked finally without looking back at Shaw.

Shaw looked up and frowned. “I don’t think there was ever gonna be a _right_ way for us, Root.”

“Yeah, but maybe we should have just gotten divorced and started from the beginning.” Root said quietly and Shaw stared at her in disbelief.

“Seriously?” Shaw asked. “You begged me to give this a chance, remember that?”

Root fell silent and Shaw just stared at her before rolling her eyes in frustration.

“You can’t just change your mind like that.” Shaw said with the spoon between her teeth.

“I was scared Sam,” Root said looking over at Shaw. “I was scared that if we did divorce that would be it, that I would lose you forever.”

Root looked at Shaw, the spoon sticking out of Shaw’s mouth. Root almost wanted to laugh at the sight, laugh with tear rimmed eyes.

“I’m scared now you know,” Root said. “I don’t want to lose you. I feel like if the boat rocks too much you’ll just leave…maybe that’s why I’ve been so crazy. I need you too much.”

Shaw lifted an eyebrow. “You know I would never just leave you.”

“You left me tonight,” Root said “And you’ve left me before too, right through that door.” Root said and pointed at the front door behind them. “And every time it feels like a sucker punch to the gut, because I know it’s my fault.”

Shaw looked at Root, one momentary glimpse and Shaw could see how unsettled she was. Everything about her, from the way she kept flexing and unflexing her fingers, her breathing was shallow and sharp, she kept clenching her jaw as if it were the only thing holding her tears back. Shaw didn’t like seeing Root unsettled, it made her feel uncomfortable in the pit of her stomach.

“It’s not your fault.” Shaw said the words didn’t sound particularly convincing as they left her mouth, but she did mean it.

Root looked up at her, furiously blinking back tears.

“I just keep trying to… I don’t even know” Root said almost laughing. “Make you happy?” Root shook her head and Shaw put down the tub and spoon.

“You want to make me happy, Root?” Shaw asked “It’s simple, stop trying.”

Root just stared at her.

“I don’t have a particularly wide range of emotions, I do angry, and I do neutral” Shaw said “my whole life that was that, and then you came crashing along, and something else appeared and I don’t quite know what it is, even now, I wouldn’t know happiness if it gave me a lap dance, but whatever it is that you manage to dig up inside me…that’s enough.”

“Are you sure…” Root asked quietly and Shaw just rolled her eyes.

“Root, you don’t even need to do anything, just seeing you dropping food down your front is enough to make that stupid feeling appear.”

“You sure that’s not just amusement?” Root asked with a tiny smile and Shaw just smirked.

“Oh that’s in there too, but I can tell the difference.” Shaw said and Root just bit her lip, looking away and wiping a stray tear off her cheek. Shaw saw her do it whether she wanted to try and hide it or not.

“Okay” Root said quietly as the silence started to settle again. “Goodnight.” she said her voice soft as she looked at Shaw before turning towards the door to go home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Everyone says marraige it hard work.....but they'll get through it right? they have to........... :o
> 
> let me know what you're thinking!! xx  
> thank you for reading!


	39. What Now?

“Hold on,” Shaw said as Root headed for the door. Immediately Root stopped and glanced back. “You just said you hate it when I walk out, and now you’re doing that to me.” Shaw frowned and Root raised an eyebrow.

“I didn’t think you’d mind,” Root said “I thought you wanted the space.”

“Did I ever actually say that?” Shaw asked and Root glanced at the ground.

“I figured it was implied,” Root said and Shaw rolled her eyes tugging at her ear a little as she looked at Root, and Root bit her lip.

“You know I think that’s what they call a mixed message” Root said and tried not to smirk. Shaw watched her. “Maybe you should specify how much space you want.”

“Okay” Shaw said still watching her.

“Here to the brownstone,” Root said walking towards Shaw slowly. “Living room to the bedroom, or” she said stopping just shy of an arms length away from Shaw. They stared at each other and Shaw looked like she was about to smile, but she didn’t. Instead she took a step away from Root.

“Bedroom to living room is fine” Shaw said and Root tried to hide the disappointment that crept through her heart as Shaw moved towards the bedroom.

“I know it doesn’t mean much, but I am sorry” Root said and Shaw stopped, pausing before turning around again to look at Root.

“I know.” Shaw said. “And I probably shouldn’t be so mean to you about listening, you do only have one ear.” Shaw said as a smirk stretched across her mouth and Root just stared at her, trying not to smile.

“I would listen to you forever Sam,” Root said “but sometimes I get distracted because you’re kinda pretty.”

Shaw smirked and rolled her eyes turning back towards the bedroom.

“Goodnight, Root.”

“Night, Sam.” Root said quietly hearing the bedroom door click shut. “I love you.”

Root sighed softly and turned to look at the couch, feeling her muscles ache just by looking at it. Regardless Root threw herself onto the couch, pulling a blanket over herself and staring at the ceiling. This would be okay, she told herself. Shaw wasn’t going anywhere. Root looked over at the closed bedroom door, wondering if Shaw was laying there thinking the exact same thing. More than anything she wanted to go and open it. She wondered if maybe that’s what Shaw wanted. But Root didn’t move, she stayed on the couch and rolled onto her side so she couldn’t see the door. She stared at the carpet as she eyes started to grow heavy, focused on the tiniest speck of blood that had stained the rug from when she had restitched Shaw’s leg on Christmas Day.

Root didn’t notice herself falling asleep, but what felt like only moments later she was woken by the sound of Shaw’s voice.

“How the hell are you asleep?” Shaw mumbled and Root stirred moving to roll over but forgetting she was on the couch, catching herself quickly as she half slipped off onto the floor.

Her eyes still sleepy she looked at Shaw who was sitting in her boxers and a tank on the edge of the couch, her dark hair falling down past her shoulders, one side tucked behind her ear.

“Are you okay?” Root asked with a yawn stretching her arms out. “What time is it?”

“It’s like 3 in the morning,” Shaw said.

“That’s early” Root mumbled.

“Or late, if you haven’t managed to get any sleep yet.” Shaw said with a small shrug and Root looked at her.

“You can’t sleep?” Root asked with a small concerned frown appearing on her face.

“Turns out,” Shaw said “I’m kinda used to having you next to me.”

“Well actually, I’m kind of enjoying the couch” Root said with a small tired smile. “It’s comfier than it looks.”

Shaw raised an eyebrow. “It’s like a giraffe on a dog bed.”

Root couldn’t help but smile, looking away from Shaw for a moment. Every bone in her body was exhausted. She wanted to sleep. She wanted to feel Shaw’s body on hers, and just sleep without having to worry about anything else.

“You just like using me as one of those long pillow things” Root said sleepily and Shaw just nodded.

“Yeah, so get your ass up.” Shaw stuck her hand out for Root without thinking, Root glanced at it but didn’t take it, pulling herself of the couch the blanket still burritoed around her. She moved around Shaw, pausing when they were right beside each other, their bodies close, but not quite touching.

“Are you sure you don’t want me on the couch?” her voice low as she looked at Shaw with dark eyes. Shaw turned towards her so they were looking at each other, their faces dangerously close.

“We’re both adults” Shaw said and looked away from Root.

“Precisely,” Root said. “I get it, if you want me out here.”

Shaw just rolled her eyes without a word.

“Okay,” Root said quietly and walked into the bedroom. Shaw let out a sigh as she stared at the wall, no idea whether she was making the right decision or not. But leaving Root out here, on the couch wasn’t a level she was ready to be at yet. It wasn’t like them. They sorted out their problems, they didn’t sleep on them. And she hadn’t been lying about not being able to get to sleep without Root, which annoyed her more than the rest of it.

She got off the arm of the couch and walked back into the bedroom. When she went in Root had climbed under the covers on her usual side of the bed, she was lying there twisting a strand of dark hair round and round her finger. Shaw stopped at the end of the bed and looked at Root, before rolling her eyes and climbing onto it, throwing the covers over herself. Shaw moved herself closer to Root, draping an arm over her stomach, a leg over Root’s leg, and letting her head rest on Root’s chest, immediately hearing her thumping heart beat the moment her ear was against Root. It was beating a little faster than normal.

“I thought you wanted space” Root said hesitating to put her hand on Shaw, before deciding not to.

“Don’t talk.” Shaw said.

Root paused for a moment before answering. “I’m not very good at that.”

“I’ve noticed” Shaw said feeling Root’s chest rising and falling under her head.

“I could get you one of those body pillows if you want something a little more…quiet”

“As much as I would enjoy that, they don’t have a heartbeat.” Shaw mumbled sleepily.

A smile crept onto Root’s face as Shaw said that. The idea of her wife preferring her to a pillow so she could hear her heartbeat was annoyingly cute. Root wanted to say something, but she knew better, at least tonight.

“I will try and be quiet” Root said and Shaw smirked.

“You’re already failing.”

Root bit her tongue to stop her from replying, she moved her hand and it grazed against Shaw’s back. She wanted to touch her. She wanted to hold Shaw close and tell her she was sorry. But she didn’t. It wasn’t helping, it wasn’t making her feel better, but for Shaw, maybe it was what she needed. Space without space.

“I’m not used to arguing with you.” Root said softly.

“I know” Shaw said with a small yawn.

“I don’t know how to do it” Root said “It’s like I feel you slipping through my fingers and I just want to make it stop.”

Shaw lifted her head and turned to look at Root. “That’s the thing, Root, you’re holding me so tight I can’t breathe.”

Root looked at Shaw, blinking a couple of tears unwillingly feel that prickle of tears, she looked away.

“I’m _not_ going anywhere” Shaw said firmly. “If you loosen that death grip you have on me, I’m not going to take off running.”

“I believe you.” Root said and tried to convince herself at the same time. Shaw put her head back down on Root’s chest and sighed lightly.

“Don’t cry.” Shaw said.

*

When Root woke up the next morning she found the spot in the bed next to her empty. Immediately alert she glanced around the room forgetting that she was in their old apartment, a wave of nostalgia washing over her briefly before she wondered where Shaw was.

Root got out of bed and went into the living room, glancing into the kitchen and still seeing no sign of Shaw. Root swallowed hard. How had she not noticed Shaw going? Had she really just left her here? Had Shaw had some kind of epiphany in the middle of the night, finally realising how psychotic Root had been…and just left? Root’s breath caught in her throat as she pulled her clothes on quickly and pulled open the front door, almost slamming into Shaw who was sweaty and holding the key and two coffees.

They both looked at each other in shock. Root took a step back immediately and Shaw raised an eyebrow as she brushed into the apartment.

“Seriously?” she said with a frown as she looked at Root who guilty shifted where she stood. “I went for a run, Root.”

Root looked at the ground immediately feeling like an idiot.

“Did She not tell you that?”

“She didn’t tell me where you were, she’s been… quieter than usual since last night.”

“Maybe she’s teaching you a lesson” Shaw said half rolling her eyes as she dropped the coffees onto the kitchen counter and turned to glare at Root.

“Like what?” Root asked.

“I don’t know, listening perhaps” Shaw said and Root sighed. “God you have worse trust issues than I do.”

Root just looked at her and suddenly she was crying. Shaw’s eyes widened as she watched Root disintegrate in front of her in a matter of seconds. It was obvious the tears had taken Root by shock as much as Shaw, as she desperately tried to wipe them away as fast as they were falling.

“Oh jesus” Shaw muttered putting her coffee down and walking over to Root.

“I don’t know what’s wrong with me,” Root sniffed between tears. Shaw looked at her with a frown and gently put her hands on Root’s shuddering shoulders.

“Well, we can work on that” Shaw said “if you just take a deep breath and like…Sahara your eyes.”

Root stopped and looked at Shaw with a wild confusion on her face. “What does that even mean?” she said with a overwhelmed laugh as she wiped more tears off her cheeks.

“It means dry your eyes” Shaw said “I can handle you when you’re a hot badass that can murder someone without looking, but _this_ , I feel like poking you with a broom would be more comforting.”

“It wouldn’t be” Root said taking a shaky breath as a few more tears escaped down her cheeks. Shaw just stared at her, watching the tears, the way Root’s whole body was fragile and shaking from the emotion, she wondered what that would feel like. Subconsciously reaching up to Root’s face and swiping the tears away with her thumb lightly.

“You know I heard this weird theory about marriage” Shaw said “that when you do it you and that other person are stuck together _for life._ ”

Root just looked at Shaw as she tried to even out her breathing.

“And so you know what that means,” Shaw continued “even if you argue and want to punch each other, you’re not gonna go anywhere because you can’t, but also you don’t want to, because you chose _that_ person specifically to be stuck with, for life.”

“Where did you hear that theory?” Root asked.

“My parents.” Shaw answered and let her hands fall away from Root. “You know I get it, you’re alone for so long that you forget how to let people in, and I thought that was just me, but Root, you’ve got to trust people to let them in.”

“But people suck” Root said wiping the last remaining tears as Shaw passed her a coffee.

“That’s true,” Shaw said “And you probably shouldn’t trust them, but me…well I know how you feel about me.”

Root smirked a little as she took a sip from the cup.

“Look Root, we are a chaotic collision to say the very least, and I’m never going to know what the right thing to say is” Shaw said “but when I get frustrated with you, I’ll probably leave, but I will always come back.”

“You know when I was 10 my mother once told me that we all die alone.” Root said and Shaw looked at her, it was the first time she had ever mentioned her mother or her life before this.

“That’s…”

“Horrible.” Root finished. “I was 10, and for the longest time I fixated on that, that lives mean nothing because we all just die alone anyway, and then I met you…and suddenly it was like maybe my life did mean something.” Root shook her head, her finger mindlessly picking at the edge of the coffee cup. Shaw stared at the wedding ring on Root’s finger.

“Maybe you’re the one that needs some breathing room” Shaw said watching Root. “And then you can see I’ll still be here when you get back.”

“I don’t want to have to leave” Root said quietly and Shaw frowned.

“I’m not saying you have to” Shaw said.

“I don’t know what to do” Root said “I just want this to be okay.”

“Ignoring it won’t do anything.” Shaw said and Root just frowned.

“Breathing room.” she echoed softly.

“Sometimes the minute you walk away you get the clarity you want” Shaw said with a shrug “it took me from the brownstone to here.”

Root just looked at her, her dark eyes sad, then suddenly she looked distracted. Shaw knew it was The Machine.

“I have to go.” Root said and looked at Shaw. Shaw nodded and said nothing as she watched Root leave.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So Root still has those damn abandonment issues... not something particularly easy to fix.
> 
> Thank you for all your support and love! Let me know your thoughts! x


	40. On Edge

When Shaw walked into work both Reese and Finch immediately turned to look at her upon her entrance. Shaw raised an eyebrow and looked between both of them, Finch wasn’t as good as hiding expression as Reese and Shaw immediately knew what he was thinking.

“Whatever you’re going to say,” Shaw said “just don’t.”

Reese watched her walk towards them. “I’ll take it last night didn’t go well?”

Shaw just rolled her eyes, the last thing she wanted was to have to talk about this more with these two.

“It’s fine.” she said bluntly trying to force the subject to move on, but both Finch and Reese didn’t seem convinced.

“That’s not exactly a reassuring answer” Finch said and Shaw groaned.

“Remind me again why it’s your business, Harold?” Shaw asked and Finch looked away.

“You’re right,” he said. “However that doesn’t lessen my concern.”

“There’s nothing to be concerned about.” Shaw said. “Root and I are adults, we had a…”

Reese lifted an eyebrow as Shaw paused and glanced at him.

“We had an argument, but what do you expect when we work together and play together.” Shaw said with a shrug.

“And this morning she is where?” Finch asked and Shaw just shook her head.

“Our ever present third party gave her something to do, so, I have no idea.” Shaw said and threw herself down onto the closest chair. “Now can I go and shoot some people or will I have to make do with one of you?”

Finch turned back to his computer and frowned. “We do have a number.” Finch said. “So please refrain from using your firearm against your co-workers.”

“Or wife.” Reese added and Shaw just glared at him.

“Why does everyone always assume I’m going to kill my wife?” Shaw muttered to herself and Reese smirked.

“Have you met you?” he said and Shaw rolled her eyes.

“No one assumes you’re going to shoot Zoe,” Shaw said and Reese automatically looked unsettled. “And you’re like the more idiotic boy version of me.”

“Why would you mention her?” Reese asked with a frown and Shaw smirked.

“Zoe?” she asked and Reese shifted on his feet. “So it’s true?”

“What’s true?” Reese asked doing a terrible job at playing dumb.

“I always thought you two had a thing” Shaw said happy to change the subject off her, and pick apart Reese instead.

“It’s not…” Reese started but Shaw just smirked again.

“Caught.” she said. “You’re totally dating Zoe.”

“Shut up, Shaw” Reese said and Finch looked between the both of them.

“If you two are quite finished this very sibling like exchange…our number needs our help.” Finch said, Reese and Shaw stared at each other, Shaw with a challenging look in her eye as Reese was the first to look away.

“You have no proof.” Reese muttered and Shaw just let the smirk stretch across her face.

*

“Seriously,” Reese asked as Shaw raided the pockets of the men the two of them had just shot down. “How did you know?”

“It’s pretty damn obvious, John” Shaw said as she flipped through a wallet looking for anything that would help their number.

“Did she tell you or something?” Reese asked in confusion and Shaw just turned to him.

“Why would she tell me?”

“I don’t know” Reese said “Don’t girls do that?”

“Do I really look like that type of girl to you?” Shaw rolled her eyes and Reese frowned. “You remember you called me and Root out the first time we slept together right?”

Reese immediately smirked. “That’s true.”

“It’s the same as that.” Shaw said. “Except that I don’t really pay that much attention to you, so I didn’t notice until today.”

“That’s because it’s hard to get your attention when Root’s around” Reese said and Shaw let out a sigh, checking her phone quickly for any sign of Root, but there was nothing. She pretended it didn’t bother her.

“You two are okay right?” Reese asked watching the look on Shaw’s face as she tucked her phone back into her pocket.

“Yeah.” Shaw said.

“Did she hear you out?” Reese asked and Shaw just shut her eyes.

“She did.” Shaw said then looked at Reese, “turns out she’s got more issues than me.”

Reese raised an eyebrow. “Well that can’t be good.”

 _She started crying_ Shaw wanted to say, but didn’t. Root started crying and it was probably the hardest thing she’d ever watched.

“Can we just do the shooting thing, instead of the talking thing?” Shaw said and walked past Reese, tossing her extremely large gun into the backseat of the car they were about to steal and got into the drivers seat.

Reese took the cue. He didn’t mention it again for the rest of the day. But that didn’t stop the thoughts from circling around Shaw’s head like sharks in blood infested water. She didn’t know what the fuck she was supposed to do, she didn’t know what this morning had meant. Suggesting breathing room to Root had been the right thing to do, she knew that, but she didn’t know what that even meant. Was Root just going to disappear indefinitely? Because that wasn’t okay. That wasn’t what she had meant…but that was the thing, Shaw didn’t know what she had meant by that.

Shaw didn’t know. She didn’t know whether she was supposed to go home tonight, she didn’t know if she should try and contact Root, she didn’t know. And that bothered her. Because she always had her next move perfectly in line, ready to proceed with. But currently, she had no idea what was in front of her, no idea what to expect, and no idea what to do.

And the worst part was, the only person she wanted to talk to about it, was the one person she couldn’t. Root.

*

“Why did you bring me here?” Root asked The Machine as she stood on the roof of a building and looked over the edge to where Shaw and Reese had just taken down several heavily armed men. “You want me to watch Sam shoot people?” she asked then watched Shaw pause, to pull out her phone and check it. Over ten storeys up and Root could still see the look on Shaw’s face, the hesitation and concern, the confusion. That brief pause in the middle of the chaos. Before she tucked her phone away.

Root immediately considered calling Shaw. She knew Shaw had been checking to see if Root had reached out. That morning had just been…messy. Root really didn’t know what had happened, things just spilled out, overflowed, and she couldn’t stop it.

She knew she was at fault. She knew that Shaw was telling the truth when she said she wasn’t going anywhere. Those words echoed through her head everyday.

But deep down, where it was dark and full of unpleasant memories, was a part of Root that forced that hesitation to the surface. That filled her with that dreaded fear of, what if she just leaves anyway?

“You knew she was going to check for me,” Root said to The Machine and moved away from the edge of the roof after taking one last look at Shaw. “But that doesn’t….okay I’m sorry, you’re trying to prove a point.” Root sighed as The Machine spoke in her ear.

“But making me follow her around all day isn’t going to…fine,” Root said “I’m going.”

Root continued to follow The Machine’s sporadic instructions for the rest of the day, finding herself in a very close vicinity to Shaw at almost all times, but each time going entirely unnoticed.

She knew what The Machine was trying to do, she was trying to get Root to trust Shaw, by taking her to exact spots where Shaw was the minute she did something…well uncharacteristically caring. The Machine was trying to show Root that Shaw was a good person. But Root already knew that. She knew. But that uneasy feeling still sat inside her.

Then Root found herself watching Shaw go into their home at the brownstone. Root almost couldn’t bare to watch that, she didn’t know why. Suddenly her heart ached as she turned away.

“Okay” she growled at The Machine. “You can stop now.” she said her eyes brimming with tears again. She glanced back at Shaw who was disappearing inside their house, the door shutting and the light switching on. Shaw had gone home. Out of the thousands of places she could have chosen to go during this…messy time, she went home. Like she said, she wasn’t going anywhere.

*

It felt strange, being away from Root for so long. Yes, it had only been a day but after being around her constantly it was a strange change. Shaw hadn’t realised how used to it she had become. She didn’t mind being alone again, she found a certain contentment in it that who she was hadn’t been entirely lost by marriage. But she wished that it was under different circumstance. Not knowing where Root was, or if she was coming home sucked, to say the least. Her mind kept coming back to it, no matter how hard she tried to focus on something else.

So, not knowing what else to do she went to the gym. She punched out her frustration on a bag until she was sweating from every inch of her body, and her breath was so ragged and heavy she thought she might collapse. Her muscles screamed enough but she didn’t stop until her arms started shaking. She took a cold shower and picked up some Chinese food on the way home.

But when she got home the house was still quiet, aside from Bear.

She wondered how if at all even possible she could get Root to trust her, but that thought got interrupted at the sound of the door. Shaw slipped off the bar stool in the kitchen where she was eating, dodging Bear who was waiting at her feet for any dropped food, she stuck her head around the corner and saw Root leaning against the front door, with her eyes shut and blood smeared across her face.

“That better not be yours,” Shaw said and Root’s eyes immediately opened when she heard Shaw’s voice.

“I may have been a little reckless” Root said and Shaw frowned walking towards her.

“What happened?” she asked and Root avoided eye contact. Shaw could see her eyes were red, tired, from life, and from crying.

“I got into a fight.” Root said seeing no point in denying what had happened after she had watched Shaw come back here.

“And The Machine didn’t help you out?” Shaw asked an eyebrow arched.

“She tried to stop me actually,” Root said. “But I kind of felt like being beaten up.”

Shaw frowned. “I taught you to fight better than this.”

Root tried not to smile at that comment, as she looked back at Shaw’s concerned dark eyes.

“Relax Sam, they don’t look that great either.”

Shaw rolled her eyes. “Not the point.” she said and turned to walk back into the kitchen. “Your face is a mess, I’ll clean you up.”

“I can do it.” Root said and Shaw spun around.

“There’s food in the kitchen, I’ll get the med kit.” she said leaving no room for argument and Root just watched her walk off.

Root went into the kitchen and scratched Bear’s ears lightly as she pulled herself up onto the counter picking up a spare pair of chopsticks and picking at Shaw’s food, noticing that there was enough for both of them. Like Shaw had anticipated Root would be home.

“I can’t believe you’d do something so stupid.” Shaw said as she walked back into the kitchen and dumped the medical kit beside Root and looked at her. “What would possibly make you want to get beaten up?” Shaw asked as she dug through the kit to find an saline solution.

When Root didn’t say anything Shaw looked up at her, and the second their eyes met she realised. It had something to do with this morning. Shaw didn’t move her eyes off of Root, feeling her chest tighten at that realisation.

 _She’s punishing herself_ , Shaw thought and a frown twitched on her face.

Root looked away from Shaw seeing the thought cross her face. Shaw put a few drops of the saline solution onto a swab and turned back to Root.

“This is going to sting” she said, her voice low. Their bodies were close but not touching, as Root sat on the kitchen counter and Shaw stood in front of her.

Shaw turned her attention to the cut on Root’s face that was more than obviously from an undodged punch. As soon as Shaw pressed the swab against Root’s cheek she flinched, her jaw clenching and fingers grabbing the edge of the counter.

Shaw wiped the wound clean, getting all the surrounding blood off Root’s cheek and lip while she was at it, until Root’s face looked mildly back to normal. And as soon as the blood was gone Shaw could see the reddened marks on Root’s face, the bruising that had come to the surface on her pale skin.

“How’s it feeling?” Shaw asked as she put an antiseptic dressing on the cut on Root’s cheek.

“Regrettable.” Root said her eyes firmly fixed on the ceiling. Shaw smirked a little, pulling off one of the gloves and getting the whiskey from the cabinet behind them, taking off the lid with one hand and giving it to Root.

Root looked at the bottle and then at Shaw before hesitantly taking it.

“You look like you need it.” Shaw said letting Root take a swig from the bottle before she finished cleaning up Root’s face and pulled the other glove off too.

“Thank you” Root said quietly as Shaw cleaned up the counter.

“Did they get you anywhere else that needs attention?” Shaw asked and Root shook her head. Shaw sighed, sliding back into her seat and stuffing a dumpling in her mouth looking at Root. 

“When I said breathing room,” Shaw said “I um…”

“Being away from you won’t fix this” Root said and turned to look at Shaw, finally. Shaw stared at her.

“I know.” Shaw said. “Do you want to talk about it?”

“No” Root said. “I want you to show me how not to get hit in the face.”

Shaw lifted an eyebrow. “You wanna fight train?”

Root just nodded.

“Now?” Shaw asked putting down her chopsticks.

“No time like the present, Sameen.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Damn there's a lot of tension. Some things don't get resolved fast...but it's seeming a little better right? 
> 
> I love you all, and I notice all your suggestions so feel free ;) x


	41. You Move, I Move

 

“Are you ready?” Shaw asked as she walked into their spare room at the brownstone, which Root had handily turned into a training room. Padding covering the floor and the walls.

Root nodded. She had changed into gym clothes much to Shaw’s surprise, not even realising that was something Root owned. Shaw knew now was not the time to be getting distracted by Root in tights, but god fucking damn it. Shaw stretched her fingers and cracked her neck to the side, her muscles still relatively sore from her earlier workout.

“Okay,” Shaw said and stood in front of Root. “How’d they come at you?”

Root stared at Shaw with a slight frown and Shaw rolled her eyes.

“You’re not gonna get me.” Shaw reminded her and Root suddenly threw a punch toward Shaw. Shaw’s reflexes immediately kicked in and she grabbed Root’s fist with her open palm before it even got close to her face.

Root almost looked shocked.

“Told you.” Shaw said and tried not to smirk. Root tried again trying to catch Shaw off guard but it didn’t work, Shaw blocked Root’s punch again.

“You’ve gotta move faster” Shaw said. “And keep your fist tight.”

“Show me.” Root said and Shaw raised an eyebrow, she moved back from Root and turned to the side, her fists by her chin she threw several sharp jabbing punches into the air.

“Now do them this way” Root said and Shaw frowned.

“I’m not gonna hit you.” Shaw said firmly.

“I’m asking you to.” Root said and Shaw rolled her eyes.

“No, Root.” Shaw said “You’ve already done enough damage to yourself.”

“I’m not asking you to fracture my skull, Sam” Root said and folded her arms. Shaw stared at her for a moment, wondering why she seemed so persistent to get herself beaten up today. Again.

Shaw cracked her knuckles before throwing a punch at Root which was only narrowly dodged as Root moved out of the way.

“That’s why they got your face so bad” Shaw said and Root looked at her in confusion. “You can just move aside.” Shaw said. “Ready?” Shaw asked and Root just nodded carefully watching Shaw’s every move. Shaw moved slowly so that Root could see exactly what she was doing, she pushed her fist forward missing Root’s face on purpose.

“See you might have moved, but you’re not defending yourself.” Shaw said grabbing Root by the shoulder with the hand that threw the punch and forcing her down, bringing her other elbow up and nudging Root on the back of her neck.

“Unconscious.” Shaw said and let go of Root, Root stood back up and stared at her. “If I throw a punch you want to put your arm up,” Shaw said. “Flat palm against the side of your head, depending what way I go.”

Root watched Shaw demonstrate it to her, she watched the way Shaw moved. She listened to every word Shaw said. Root noticed the tone that Shaw was using to talk to her, her voice was on the quieter side tonight, level, calm. Root watched Shaw’s dark eyes following her, questioning, wondering.

“If I go left, your right arm goes up, and you swing your leg to kick me” Shaw said. “If I go right, your left arm goes up, and you instep on my foot and then get my knee.”

“Why that way?” Root asked and Shaw just half smiled.

“Because right is your dominant leg” Shaw said “you can kick better with it.”

Root pretended not to be at all affected by the fact Shaw knew which was Root’s dominant leg.

“Oh” she said quietly and felt Shaw watching her.

“Wanna try?” Shaw asked and Root nodded. “I won’t go easy on you.”

“Good.” Root said. Shaw bounced a little in front of Root to warm up.

“Keep your hands up” Shaw said noticing Root had her arms by her sides.

“No” Root said.

“Are your reflexes fast enough?” Shaw smirked and Root smiled a little.

“I guess we’ll find out.”

Shaw rolled her eyes and watched Root for a few seconds before throwing a slow punch with her left, Root’s right arm immediately came up, but not before Shaw’s hand knocked it out of th way.

“Faster” Shaw said “Keep watching me, every move.”

 _I’m always watching you_ Root wanted to say, but instead just fixed her eyes on Shaw’s hands.Feeling herself focus when Shaw threw two more punches Root blocked them both without trouble. She could tell Shaw was impressed by the look on her face every time Root was fast enough to stop one of her punches, which were slowly starting to gather speed. They were no where near as fast as the ones she threw at the punching bag in the gym, or even when she was fighting an actual person. But still, the proud smirk that stretched across her face was enough to make Root want to smile.

“Okay,” Shaw said starting to get a little breathless. “Now add that kick.”

Shaw didn’t give Root a second to think about that as she threw a punch that Root almost missed, but instead grabbing Shaw’s hand and twisting her arm and hand pushing it back against her chest until Shaw winced.

“I did not teach you that.” Shaw said and tugged her wrist free from Root and gave it a light rub.

“But it worked.” Root smirked and Shaw just looked at her, before throwing another undefendable punch, grazing Root across the cheek just enough to make her take a step back. Root stared at her in shock for a moment before lurching forward, Shaw quickly dodged out of the way. But Root grabbed her, catching her arm again and twisting it behind her back before bringing her knee up to Shaw’s stomach and hearing a groan as she half knocked the air out of Shaw who was doubled over.

Shaw pulled herself back up fast, wrenching her arm back from Root’s grip and pushing her back, jabbing her with an elbow. But Shaw had trained Root how to fight before, and Root remembered. So she fought back, and the exhilaration that was flowing through her veins didn’t stop. But Shaw held up a fight, she wouldn’t stop until she had won.

They wrestled each other, fingers digging in to each others skin, bruises forming just under the surface of their skin.

Then finally, Shaw stopped, she let Root swing a punch at her and it caught her teeth and lower lip, immediately she could taste blood in her mouth. Root froze. They stared at each other, as Shaw’s hand touched her lip, she looked at her fingers, the red blood stain on them, then back at Root.

“So that was decent.” Shaw said and Root just stared at the blood on Shaw’s fingers.

“I didn’t mean to…”

“Sure you did.” Shaw said with a shrug and Root looked at her.

“No, I’m sorry” Root said with a frown and Shaw just wiped her lip.

“It’s just blood, babe” Shaw said calmly, not even noticing that little last word that slipped out of her mouth with the bitter taste of blood on her tongue. But Root did. Root heard that. And it made her want to regret every single thing she had done or said that day. It made her regret asking Shaw to do this, asking Shaw to do any of it.

Root stared at the ground. Shaw stepped closer to her.

“Look at me.” Shaw said and Root lifted her head, almost afraid at what Shaw might say next.

“Square up.” Shaw said, Root looked confused. Shaw kicked one of Root’s legs back gently.

“Bend your legs” Shaw said “power comes from your legs.”

Shaw watched Root carefully, knowing there was a whole lot sitting right under the surface that Root would refuse to talk about until it was forced out of her. And even then…maybe not. So for now, this was the best she could do.

Shaw moved so that she was beside Root, putting her hands lightly on Root’s hips. Aside from their wrestling match seconds ago, this was the first time they had touched each other all day.

Root’s jaw clenched as she felt the warmth of Shaw’s hands on her hips.

“Twist your hips” Shaw said lightly and moved Root’s hips with her hands in the correct rotation. Shaw’s voice was low, soft. Root wanted to turn around and kiss her, but everything just felt too complicated for that.

“Swing your upper body.” Shaw said next, her hands edging up to Root’s waist. Root exhaled a little at Shaw’s hands touching her so softly, she could feel everything through the flimsy fabric of her top.

“When you punch, it should come from your legs, up your back, through your shoulders and to your fist down your arm” Shaw said, moving her hands from where they had been sitting on Root’s waist, up to her shoulders. Her fingers wrapping around ROot’s shoulders lightly before moving them down her extended arm.

“You should aim to hit your target with the flat of your fingers,” Shaw said moving around so she was in front of Root. Taking Root’s fist in her hand and dragging her fingers over the flat. “Just below the knuckles.” Shaw added and flicked her eyes up to look at Root who was staring directly at her.

“But there’s one very important rule,” Shaw said before throwing a punch and catching Root straight in the gut, sending her doubling over and gasping for air. “Never get distracted.”

Root groaned loudly as she dragged in mouthfuls of air, entirely winded by Shaw’s punch.

Shaw took a step back and wiped the beads of sweat from her forehead, picking up the water bottle that was by the door and turning to look at Root. Bent in half, gasping for air.

Shaw went back over to her and put a hand tentatively on Root’s back lightly.

“Stand up.” Shaw said quietly and waited for Root to straighten back up, letting her hand slide off her back, then handed her the water.

“Do you want to tell me what this is really about now?” Shaw asked and Root just stared at her, before taking a sip of the water.

“You know what it’s about.” Root said her voice a little hoarse from being winded.

“I don’t actually,” Shaw said with a frown. “I don’t get why you’re wanting me to sucker punch you.”

“I’ve had a crappy day.” Root said and Shaw just stared at her.

“So typically you want your wife to beat you up” Shaw said and Root just stared at her.

“Don’t.” Root said.

“No,” Shaw demanded “You don’t. I want you to talk to me.”

Root looked away and took a deep breath. “I don’t know okay.”

“You don’t know what, why you want me to beat you up?” Shaw asked desperately searching Root’s face for any kind of answer.

“I don’t know what’s wrong with me.” Root said turning to face Shaw.

Shaw stared at her, eyes dark. “There’s not a damn thing wrong with you, Root.”

“There clearly is,” Root said trying to keep her shit together, “or we wouldn’t be like this.”

“Like what?” Shaw asked and Root shook her head.

“Don’t act like you aren’t painfully aware of this.” Root struggling with herself more than anything.

Shaw frowned and stayed quiet for a moment. “Turn around.” she suddenly instructed and Root raised an eyebrow.

“Why?”

“Because I said so.” Shaw said and Root slowly turned around so her back was to Shaw.

“Do you trust me?” Shaw asked and Root immediately turned back around.

“We’re not doing trust falls, Sameen.”

Shaw lifted an eyebrow. “We’re not leaving this damn room until we do a trust fall.”

Root wanted to smile but couldn’t quite summon the strength to. Regardless, she turned back around and took a small breath, trying to ignore the fact that the smallest part of her got nervous right before she let herself go, and fell, back, back, and straight into Shaw’s arms.

Shaw pushed her back to her feet.

“So you do trust me” Shaw said with a satisfied smirk. “You just don’t trust me not to leave, even though I’m here.”

“I never imagined you’d ever stick around this long” Root said quietly and Shaw just looked at her.

“Make that two of us.” Shaw said with a playful smirk. “But turns out, I kinda dig the whole nerdy psycho thing, like a lot.”

“Despite trying to force you to go out with me for like a year, I still never thought it would end up like this…” Root said and Shaw instinctively took a step closer to her.

“I get why you’re worried, Root, okay, I do” Shaw said quietly “But you can’t worry about something that you can never predict will happen.”

“I know that.” Root said, she was staring at the ground again. Shaw slipped a hand under Root’s chin and tilted her face up so they were looking at each other.

“I’m telling you Root, everything I need is standing in front of me with a bruised face.” Shaw said her eyes not leaving Root’s. “You move, I move.”

“I don’t deserve you.” Root said softly.

“What are you talking about?” Shaw said with a slight smile “we’re perfect for each other, you’re gonna figure that out someday.”

Root just stared at her, hearing her own words come out of Shaw’s mouth. She looked at Shaw’s lips, wanting to kiss them more than anything else, despite the split and the blood stain inflicted by her. Her eyes looked back at Shaw’s, and then she moved towards the door.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> They're trying! They are, but these things take time. And Sam is being damn adorable in the mean time... I think Root is trying to deal with so much, but she's starting to miss being close to Sam....
> 
> Let me know what you think! Thank you for reading and all the endless support xx


	42. Instinct

When Shaw woke up the next morning Root wasn’t in the bed. But judging from the sound she could hear coming from downstairs she figured she wasn’t alone here.

Shaw went downstairs and found Root and Bear in the living room, Root was surrounded by various computer parts and cables. Bear was watching from the couch, or rather watching the french toast that Root had between her teeth.

“Morning,” Shaw said as she walked into the room and looked at all the crap that was covering the floor. “And this is?”

“I’m building a faster processor” Root said and Shaw just rolled her eyes with a smile.

“Of course you are.” Shaw said and climbed into the couch beside Bear, reaching for Root’s plate of toast and grabbing herself a piece.

“Yours is in the kitchen” Root said and Shaw took a bite of Root’s anyway.

“It always tastes better when it’s stolen” Shaw smirked and Root turned to look at her.

It almost felt normal. Almost. The way Shaw looked at her with that amused smirk, dark eyes, even stealing Root’s food. But it wasn’t, it wasn’t quite there yet.

“How’s your face feeling?” Shaw asked and Root scrunched her nose up a little.

“I feel like I’ve been hit by a truck.” Root said and put down the computer parts in her hand and leaned her head back against the seat of the couch. Shaw looked at Root, their eyes met, regardless of Root being upside down.

“That’s kinda what happens when you take two beatings in a night” Shaw said and Root just watched her wife.

“I’m sorry about your lip” Root said reaching up and dragging a finger gently across the reddened cut on Shaw’s lower lip.

“It’s barely a scratch” Shaw said and grabbed Root’s hand before she could pull it away, kissing the back of her hand before letting go of it. It was instinct, for both of them more than anything. And more than that for Shaw it was just nice feeling like Root wasn’t so distant this morning. It felt like she was here.

Shaw got up from the couch and went into the kitchen pouring herself and Root some coffee before bringing it back into the living room.

“So do you wanna know something interesting?” Shaw asked and Root raised an eyebrow as she took the mug from Shaw’s hand.

“I didn’t know you had any fun facts, Sam” Root said and Shaw just rolled her eyes.

“John and Zoe are a thing” Shaw said and Root frowned.

“Really?”

“What’s that look for?” Shaw asked seeing the glimpse of a frown cross Root’s face.

“I didn’t really see that coming” Root said and Shaw shrugged.

“I think they’re probably good for each other.” Shaw said and Root just looked at her.

“Says the girl who doesn’t do relationships” Root said and Shaw stared back at her.

“Hey I’m a married woman” Shaw said and Root smiled a little.

“But you still hate relationships” Root pointed out and Shaw took a sip from her coffee.

“Yeah, but not this one” Shaw said.

“I think you’ve spent too much time around me” Root said putting her mug down and picking up a couple of cables.

“Why do you say that?” Shaw said “Do I have to remind you how marriage works…again?”

Root just smirked as she inspected the cables. “No, you’ve picked up my flirting habits.”

Shaw stared at her. “Who said anything about me flirting?”

“You might think you weren’t, Sameen, but your eyes were saying something else.” Root said.

“You’re right.” Shaw said moving closer to Root and setting her mug down on the table too. Root glanced at her with an eyebrow raised.

“I do spend too much time around you.” Shaw smirked, and then kissed Root’s forehead. Root looked at her before suddenly looking away and Shaw frowned.

“No?” she asked and Root remained with her eyes looking the opposite way.

“Yes.” Root said quietly, flicking her eyes down to stare at the floor. Shaw didn’t move or say anything, she let Root have that moment of space. But when Root didn’t say anything else Shaw slipped down onto the floor beside where Root was sitting and looked at her.

“What can I do?” Shaw said and Root eventually turned to look at her. There were a thousand words buzzing around her head, Shaw could see it, she could practically watch the hundreds of racing thoughts right behind Root’s eyes. But none of them were going to come out, she knew that much. Without a second thought, Shaw moved again, pushing Root back against the couch while she climbed onto her lap. _Fuck space._ Shaw thought. _She’s my fucking wife._

Root was stunned for a moment before her arms instinctively slipped around Shaw’s waist, pulling her so much closer, so that she could feel the warmth of Shaw’s body against her own.

Shaw let out a content sigh as she let Root pull her in, slipping her arms around Root’s neck and inhaling the scent of her hair.

Root almost couldn’t bare to let go, feeling Shaw’s strong arms holding her. Feeling her body so close, so unmoving. It wasn’t Shaw, she realised at that very moment. It was her, it was her issue. And yes she already did know that, but sometimes things get so lost…and right now, it was just abundantly clear, that it _was not_ Shaw.

“Sameen,” Root said softly.

“Yeah Root?”

“Why _did_ you stay?” Root asked and Shaw pulled back a little brushing Root’s hair from her eyes and looking at her closely.

“I don’t think there’s just one easily explainable reason” Shaw said.

“Try me.” Root said and Shaw knew that it was what Root needed to hear.

“You remember that time I broke into your old place?” Shaw said. “You had those barbed wire cuts on your back, and I’d been shot in the side?”

“I stitched you up on my bathroom floor.” Root said with a small reminiscent smile.

“Mhm” Shaw said with a little smile. “You said to me that people just get married to they have someone to put them back together after a bad day.”

“I remember that” Root said. “I was trying to convince you to stay.”

“I know you were,” Shaw said “you also said to me _who else_ _do we have?_ And you know when I went home that night and tried to convince myself that I couldn’t stay married, something somewhere inside me did not agree, and every time I tried to tell myself it was time to call it quits, that little part of me would pinch at me and ask if I really wanted to do that.”

“Why did you listen to it?” Root asked watching Shaw’s eyes closely.

“Because if you hesitate even for a second, there’s a reason.” Shaw said. “And in that case, that reason was every single one of those times like on your bathroom floor, that made me want to trust you with everything.”

“And do you?” Root’s voice was barely a whisper.

“Everything except the 37mil” Shaw said with a smirk “oh and the Ferrari.”

“So it was an instinct?” Root asked and Shaw nodded.

“I guess so, but it was a pretty good one” Shaw said and Root looked at her. “You said this didn’t have to be hard, and you were right, it’s not, it just takes…adjusting.”

“Turns out maybe I’m not so good at that” Root said and Shaw just shook her head.

“You trusted me even when I didn’t.” Shaw said. “You trusted we’d make this work, that wasn’t just based off nothing.”

Root just let out a sigh and looked down between the small space between their bodies.

“How is that I feel like I miss you, but you’re right here?”

“Because you’ve been up here,” Shaw said and tapped Root’s temples lightly with her fingers. “And up there makes you think you’re not worthy of any kind of happy end.”

“What if it’s right?” Root asked and Shaw just watched Root.

“What do you think?”

“I think…in some twisted way you’re the best thing that’s happened to me.” Root said her fingers moving instinctively up Shaw’s spine.

“So if you think that why are you listening to that voice?” Shaw asked “All it’s doing is creating doubt in that beautiful brain of yours.”

“I love you” Root said but she wasn’t looking at Shaw. She was looking down, away, anywhere else but those dark eyes that wouldn’t unfix off her.

“I know you do,” Shaw said and wrapped herself around Root again, holding her tightly. “And I just want to help you.”

“Can we stay here forever then?” Root asked and Shaw smiled, before pulling back and glancing at Root before she got up.

“No” Shaw said as she grabbed the other piece of toast off the plate. “But if you enjoy having me on top of you so much we could revisit that later.” Shaw said with a smirk as she crunched down on the toast as she walked out of the room.

“Definitely spending too much time around me” Root muttered unable to help the small smile that had crept onto her face as she watched Shaw leave the room. Followed by a wave of feeling extremely overwhelmed. Overwhelmed that somehow she had managed to get lucky enough to have someone like Shaw in her life. Someone who was unabashedly on her side, rooting for her. And that feeling came with the slightest light that maybe it would work out okay in the end after all, that maybe, just maybe she might be alright.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was feeling kind of soft tonight...and this just came out. 
> 
> Keep all your thoughts and feelings coming, I love reading them! And thank you so much for all your kind words, truly. The addiction of this story literally will not stop, and I'm so glad you're all still along for the ride! x


	43. No Rest For The Wicked

When Root and Shaw walked into Finch’s later that morning he turned around surprised to see Root, Shaw raised an eyebrow when she caught the look on his face.

“Where’s Reese?” she asked straight away before he could say anything. It was obvious that Root wasn’t her usual self, even by the way she walked in trailing behind Shaw. She barely looked at Harold, there was no witty banter or awkward comments, she was just…silent.

“Out” Finch said “We got a number this morning.”

“And you didn’t call us sooner?” Shaw asked leaning over Finch to look at the person that was on his screen.

Finch looked at Shaw then glanced past her at Root. Shaw looked at him with a warning look in her eye.

“It has _nothing_ to do with her” Shaw growled under her breath and Finch turned back to the screen.

“Daniel Riverton” Finch said loud enough so that Root could hear as well, even though she was sitting picking at a chipped black nail, looking utterly bored. “Software engineer.”

Finch kept talking and Shaw tried to listen, but her attention kept wandering back to Root. Halfway through Finch’s little talk though, she got to her feet and walked over to where his picture was taped to the board.

“What’d he do?” Root asked bluntly and both Shaw and Finch looked at her in shock.

“We don’t know that he’s done anything, Ms Groves” Finch said “Which is precisely the problem…that and, well Mr Reese can’t seem to locate him.”

Root just rolled her eyes. “It’s easier to disappear than you think.” she said and Shaw frowned.

“I’ll find him.” Root said and spun on her heel towards the door.

“Wait, Root” Shaw said reaching to grab her but missing, her fingers grabbing at the air as Root turned to stop several paces in front of her.

“Want me to come?” Shaw asked and Root raised an eyebrow.

“What? Have I suddenly lost my big girl privileges?” Root asked and Shaw’s frown deepened.

“Lose the attitude, I’m just asking.” Shaw said and Root’s face instantly softened as Shaw called her out.

“I’ll be fine.” Root said her tone softer.

“Ms Groves,” Finch said from behind them both as they stared at each other. “I would recommend sitting this one out.”

Root raised an eyebrow as she looked past Shaw at Finch, with an uncomfortable look on her face.

“And why’s that Harold?” she asked with a certain sharpness creeping back into her voice.

“Mr Reese can handle it.” Finch said and Root almost laughed.

“That big lug can’t even find Daniel, how is he meant to protect him?” Root asked and spun around before Finch could answer and stormed out the door.

Shaw stared after Root her eyes widening, before she snapped back to Finch.

“I’m going after her,” Shaw said. “And for gods sake Harold, call her _Root._ ”

*

“Okay so that was fairly uncomfortable,” Shaw said as she jogged to keep up with Root who was storming down the sidewalk.

“Was it?” Root asked and Shaw just rolled her eyes.

“He’s getting to you, Root, I’m not an idiot.” Shaw said and Root just let out a deep sigh.

“Sam,” she said coming to a stop and taking Shaw by the shoulders, looking directly at her.

“I don’t need you to babysit me,” Root said “I appreciate it, but it wasn’t Harry’s number that came up.”

Shaw rolled her eyes. “Beside the point.”

“Is it?” Root asked and Shaw just looked away.

“Fine. I’m here if you need me.” Shaw said and held both her hands up in surrender, knowing there wasn’t much else that she could do.

“Daniel is obviously in hiding, which means he’s not as innocent as Harold wants him to be, I’ll find him, and when I do, then you can help.” Root said and Shaw just stared at her.

“Are those Her instructions?” Shaw asked.

“No, Sameen, they’re mine.” Root said.

“Just…don’t do anything dramatic.” Shaw said and Root just smiled, tapping the end of Shaw’s nose lightly before she started walking again.

“When do I ever, Sameen.” she called over her shoulder and Shaw just watched her go, shaking her head a little.

“Reese?” she said tapping her earpiece. “Please tell me you’ve found our number.”

“He’s not an easy guy to find, Shaw.” Reese’s voice replied and Shaw just groaned. It’s not that she didn’t trust Root, it’s just that Root not being herself lately made her a little more careless, and that just couldn’t end well. Shaw knew that she couldn’t follow Root without the Machine mentioning it to her, so instead she got herself a coffee and decided to go and catch up with Reese, which would hopefully get her close to the number.

*

Root didn’t know why she had told Shaw not to come with her, in all honesty she probably would have preferred the company more than being alone. Shaw had been right that morning when she said that Root had been trapped in her head lately. But she couldn’t seem to escape even though she wanted to. It bugged her because she was so aware of it, aware of the difference it was making on her relationship with Shaw. She didn’t understand how Shaw had the patience to stick around, or why she’d even want to. Root was more than aware that her behaviour had been…distant to say the least. She thought about when Shaw got like that, which had happened countless times in the past, Root hadn’t left once.

She let out a frustrated sigh as she looked at her phone, trying to find Daniels location based on the information the Machine had just sent her.

She contemplated calling Shaw, or just texting her her current location. She felt content with Shaw by her side, despite the distance mentally that was stopping them from being as close as usual, there was something about Shaw being beside her that set her mind somewhat at ease.

Like the calm, before the storm of her thoughts washed her up again.

Locating Daniel’s exact location on the map on her phone she realised she didn’t have time to contact Shaw, as he was literally holed up in building two blocks from her.

She picked up the pace and got to the building he was in before he could move again. Pulling her gun out just in case before bursting through the door in two flights up the young guy on the couch leapt to his feet bewildered at Root’s unexpected entrance.

“Daniel” she said with a slight smile. “Do me a favour and don’t run.”

But Daniel took one look at her and bolted for the window. Root just sighed and turned to go back out the main door, knowing he would have to climb the fence to get back onto the street. She could make it there before him, by simply using the entrance. Idiot, she thought and dashed back down the stairs the way she had come.

Pushing open the door she was just in time to see Daniel leaping over the fence a couple of meters ahead of her.

“Daniel, if you just talk to me” Root tried again. “Then I can help you.”

Daniel just shook his head. “No,” he said distraught. “No one can help me.”

A frown formed on Root’s face. Daniel glanced at the gun in Root’s hand.

*

“Sameen” Finch’s voice piped up in Shaw’s ear.

“What is it Finch?” Shaw asked.

“I’ve located Mr Riverton,” he said “and more importantly, he’s not the perpetrator, despite his somewhat questionable record.”

“Well, that’s great” Shaw said pulling her gun to take out some of the stragglers that Reese hadn’t managed to kneecap yet. “Because we found the guys who wanted him dead.”

“And they’re…”

“Taken care of” Shaw said “Almost, now where is this guy?”

Finch gave her the location, and it was just around the corner from where she was.

“You good to finish up here?” Shaw asked watching Reese dodging punches from one of the last couple of guys standing. Reese just grunted and Shaw smirked as she tucked her gun into the back of her jeans and broke into a gentle jog around the corner.

Immediately she saw Root and Daniel standing in some kind of face off, the only ones on the deserted street. Shaw noticed what was wrong instantly. Root had her gun out. And it was pointed at Daniel. Shaw wanted to yell at her to stop, but somehow the words got caught in the back of her throat. Root hadn’t see her yet, neither had Daniel. She started running towards Root.

She got closer, her hand started reaching for Root’s gun. Then suddenly.

Bang.

Shaw froze in place, it was like everything had suddenly been stopped. Paused. Root’s arm stretched, her finger on the trigger, her eyes fixed on Daniel.

Shaw spun around and saw Daniel on the ground, bullet straight through his skull. She looked back at Root who still hadn’t moved.

Shaw lurched towards Root, knocking the gun out of Root’s hand and grabbing her by the shoulders. Root’s eyes were still fixed on the body behind them.

“Root” Shaw practically shouted in her face, but she still wasn’t paying attention, it was like the life was being slowly sucked out of her.

“Hey” Shaw said tapping the side of Root’s face with her fingers until Root finally snapped out of it and turned her attention to Shaw.

“Just look at me.” Shaw said her hand sliding to Root’s neck, the other still on her shoulder holding her. Root’s eyes started to wander back towards where Daniel had been standing only seconds ago.

“Root,” Shaw’s voice brought her back to looking at her wife, right in front of her. Her heart was racing, but she could barely feel anything else.

“Focus on me okay,” Shaw said, knowing very well that the feeling of shooting an unarmed victim….their number, had already set in to Root, and she was going into shock.

Root just nodded looking at Shaw, her face pale.

Shaw stared at Root for a moment, every single thought escaping her mind as those brown eyes bore holes into her soul, screaming for help.

“Fuck” Shaw whispered under her breath and let go of Root, “don’t move.” she said stupidly knowing damn well that Root wasn’t about to go anywhere. Shaw ran over to Daniel’s body, looking down at him and swallowing the hard lump that had formed in her throat.

Shaw crouched in front of his body, stupidly taking his pulse, but knowing damn well no one on this earth survives a bullet to the brain.

“Reese” she said into her earpiece “get your fucking ass here now.”

“Shaw, I’m…”

“Reese” Shaw yelled loudly. “I said _now.”_

“What happened?” Reese asked, clearly shocked at her loss of levelheadedness.

“Our numbers dead.” Shaw said and heard Reese pause.

“What?”

“Will you just…” Shaw wiped the sweat off her forehead with the back of her hand “It’s Root.” Shaw said not knowing what else to say.

“I’m coming.” was all Reese said. Shaw ran back over to Root who hadn’t moved, Shaw wasn’t even sure she’d blinked.

“Come here,” Shaw said taking Root and leading her away from the body, sitting her where she couldn’t see it. Shaw crouched in front of her, pulling her jacket off and throwing it around Root’s shoulders.

“I’m right here, okay” Shaw said desperately searching Root’s eyes, her hand running down the side of Root’s face gently. “Can you tell me what happened?”

Root shook her head a little.

“That’s okay,” Shaw said glancing behind her and seeing Reese running down the road. “Just breathe, big deep breaths, yeah?” Shaw said letting her hand run through Root’s hair softly, her fingers lightly touching the top of Root’s ear as she tucked her hair behind her ear.

“What happened?” Reese asked stopping beside where Shaw was crouched in front of Root, he glanced back at the body.

“I can only imagine the jackass got what he deserved” Shaw said picking her words carefully with Root being right there.

“But I thought Finch said…”

“Whatever.” Shaw cut him off and got back to her feet. “I need to get her out of here.”

Reese helped Shaw get Root back to her feet as well and then pulled out his phone. “I’ll get Fusco” he said “at least this guy had plenty of people who wanted him dead, it’ll be easy to stick it to one of them.”

Shaw just nodded, feeling Root holding one of her hands with both of her own.

“I’ll stay here and wait for Lionel” Reese said. “Take her.”

Shaw looked at him and thanked him silently, Reese glanced at Root, then back at Shaw with a sharp nod. He understood.

Calculating the misfortune that Finch’s was going to the closest and easiest to get to, Shaw dragged Root to the nearest subway, knowing that neither of them driving right now was probably the best idea.

“Sam,” Root said quietly leaning against the wall of the subway station as they waited, Shaw standing in front of her protectively, one hand on the wall beside Root. “I don’t know what happened.”

Shaw looked at her concerned. “As in you can’t remember or…”

“I don’t know why I did it.” Root said “She was telling me to stop, but I just…”

“We shoot people everyday” Shaw said trying anything to make her feel better.

“In the knees” Root said.

“Not always.” Shaw said and Root just stared at her.

“I don’t know what’s happening to me” Root said and Shaw could see that she was about to fall apart.

“Root,” Shaw said quietly. “Look at me,” she said taking Root’s chin and forcing her to look at Shaw. “Just look right here okay, that’s all that matters.”

“There was something about the look in his eye, Sam” Root said quietly and Shaw just shook her head.

“Don’t do that,” she said and Root stopped. “What’s going to help you right now?”

“You.” Root said.

Shaw smiled, her eyes fixed on Root’s face. Root looked at _that_ smile, that damn smile. During the worst time, in the worst situation, there it was. Pulling her from whatever dark corner she had fallen in, Root looked away with the corners of her mouth twitching upward.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Root shot their number :O oh no... Shaw is being too good for this damn world at the moment too. 
> 
> I'm loving all your comments at the moment, you're all so kind. It truly means the world to me.   
> And these suggestions...I'm taking notes don't worry ;)
> 
> Let me know what you think, as always x


	44. Lifeline

Shaw practically kicked down Finch’s door, putting Root in the nearest chair and grabbing her a glass of water before even acknowledging the deeply troubled look on Finch’s face.

“Ms Groves…” Finch said and Shaw spun around again.

“Her name is Root, Harold, I’m not going to tell you again” Shaw said forcefully “And if you say another goddamn word I’m going to kneecap you, okay?”

Finch’s eyes widened in horror at her sudden outbreak, but he simply nodded and turned away, giving the two of them the privacy they needed. Shaw knew he would understand if he looked past the blunt delivery of what she had said. If anything it just proved to him how much she cares about Root.

“That was dramatic,” Root said as Shaw turned back to her and Shaw rolled her eyes.

“I’m allowed to be, but you’re not.” Shaw said and Root sipped her water. Shaw ran her fingers through Root’s hair again and let out a small sigh.

“God, you’re a mess” Shaw said quietly “What are we gonna do with you?”

“Not shoot me, hopefully.” Root said and Shaw raised an eyebrow.

“Making jokes already? You must be feeling better.” Root automatically looked down with a frown creasing her forehead. Why had she pulled the trigger, why. She killed their number. They _never_ kill their numbers.

“Someone killed me once, these things happen.” Shaw said with a shrug and Root looked at her.

“But what’s going on in there…that’s something we can work out.” Shaw said and tapped to top of Root’s head lightly.

“Any ideas how?” Root asked setting her glass of water down and leaning forward, head in her hands. “I feel like I’m making everything worse.”

Shaw leaned on the table across from where Root was sitting and looked at her. “You’re not.” she said simply and Root looked up at her, feeling like there was a truth to Shaw’s words even if she couldn’t find it herself.

“Life is messy, and that’s not your fault” Shaw said with a shrug as she saw the pause of confusion on Root’s face. “We’re just caught up in it.”

“I didn’t even give him a chance to explain himself.” Root said and shook her head. “I’ve never…done that, every life matters, and I just _took_ his.”

“We’ve both killed a lot of people, Root” Shaw said still watching Root. “And the world keeps spinning with or without them.”

“What if he didn’t deserve that,” Root asked.

“What if he did?” Shaw said.“If you hadn’t done that, there’s a pretty definite chance someone else would have.”

“At least they would have had a reason,” Root said. “I just murdered him.”

“Don’t use that word.” Shaw said with a frown.

“Sam, don’t treat me like I’m some fragile little flower” Root said with frustration creeping into her tone.

“I’m just trying to keep you from falling apart, Root.”

“I think it’s too late for that” Root said quietly as she glanced at Shaw.

Shaw was silent for a moment, she got off the table and shook her head as she stared vacantly at a spot on the floor, before turning to look back at Root.

“Well, then, I’ll put you back together.” she said, and with those few words the entire look on Root’s face changed, from where she had fallen to in that deep dark place, to suddenly looking like a lifeline had just been dropped to her.

“Every life matters, including yours.” Shaw said before Root could say anything. “And to me, only yours.”

Root got to her feet, and Shaw instinctively moved towards her to get her to sit back down again.

“You’re still in shock,” Shaw said her hand on Root’s arm. But Root didn’t listen, she didn’t care. She had that look in her eye, the one where it was like nothing else in this world existed but Shaw. The intensity of her dark eyes didn’t go unnoticed by Shaw, who looked up and then suddenly couldn’t look away.

“I’m fine,” Root said her voice low as she wrapped her arms around Shaw’s body, pulling them together close. The second she felt Shaw’s arms twist around her waist and hold her tightly her mind felt at ease. She felt safe, she felt like she was home. Everything fell away, except for Shaw. Root didn’t understand how it was possible, for another person to make her feel like everything was going to be okay, to make her feel like actually she wasn’t utterly alone. She didn’t understand how Shaw, of all people, was the one that could do this. Shaw, who wasn’t even meant to have feelings in the first place, who wasn’t meant to care, turned out to be the one person who made Root feel like she could stand up and fight, who made her feel…alive, and happy.

“I love you” Root mumbled into Shaw’s ear, her eyes tightly shut as she tried to force this moment to freeze in time.

“I know you do,” Shaw said quietly, “You just need to love yourself too.”

Root’s eyes opened.

“I don’t need to.” Root said and Shaw pulled back so they could look at each other.

“Yeah you do.” Shaw said.

“Why?” Root asked quizzically but before Shaw could answer Finch’s voice interrupted them.

“Sameen,” he said and Shaw turned to look at him.

“Be very careful what you say next, Harold.” Shaw said and Finch looked momentarily worried before holding up a brown paper bag.

“Soup.” he said and Shaw lifted an eyebrow.

“Okay,” she said with a shrug and let go of Root, walking over to Finch to take the bag, but he didn’t let go immediately.

“How is she?” he asked his voice low so Root couldn’t hear him. Shaw stared at him.

“Not great.” Shaw said.

“Do you think perhaps she needs…”

“No” Shaw said and cut him off before even hearing what he had to say.

“I know she’s your wife, Sam, but if this situation calls for…” Shaw stopped him again before he could finish, snatching the bag from his hand.

“What this calls for is a bath, her bunny slippers and a pretty large fucking reminder that she is a spectacular person” Shaw said through her teeth “which at this point will probably come from Bear, because even he can do a better job at consoling than you can.”

Before he could answer Shaw spun around and walked back over to Root, sliding the bag across the table and sitting down, waiting to hear his footsteps disappear.

“You shouldn’t be so hard on him” Root said opening the bag and pulling out the soup. Shaw just rolled her eyes, her arms folded across her chest.

“When you’ve stopped shaking we’re going home” Shaw said.

“I’m not shaking” Root denied and Shaw raised an eyebrow.

“Try and get that spoon to your mouth without spilling any soup.” she said and Root just frowned, lifting the spoon thinking she was holding her hand steady but watching the soup spill off as her hand shook.

“Maybe he should have gotten a sandwich” Root said and dropped the spoon witha sigh. Shaw just smirked a little, unable to help it, as she scooted her chair closer to Root so she was directly in front of her.

“Open” Shaw said as she picked up the spoon and Root just stared at her.

“No” she said. “You are not spoon-feeding me.”

“We took vows” Shaw reminded her and Root rolled her eyes.

“This was not one of them” Root said and Shaw smirked.

“Open your fucking mouth.”

Root glared at her before opening her mouth just wide enough for Shaw to get the spoon in. Shaw hesitated for a moment before pulling the spoon back, looking at Root, a small smile tugging at the corners of her mouth. The knot that had been pulling at her stomach the past few days while Root had been clearly unsettled loosened somewhat in that moment, looking at Root, seeing the familiar stubborn look in her eye as Shaw had the spoon in her mouth.

It was familiar, and it was also stupidly cute. _I love her_ Shaw thought. _How the fuck is that even possible, I_ love _her. I’m not meant to even feel that._

“What?” Root asked as Shaw scooped up some more soup, that damn smile creeping onto her face.

“Nothing” Shaw said putting her other hand underneath the spoon so none dripped. Root opened her mouth again, this time without protest. Her eyes focused on Shaw, trying to decipher the smile on her face as she swallowed the soup.

“What’s that look?” Root asked.

“Nothing,” Shaw said the smile widening somewhat. “You’re…”

Shaw didn’t finish that sentence, she stirred the spoon around the soup and Root just watched her.

“I’m what? Incapable?” Root asked and Shaw turned back to her.

“Perfectly imperfect.” Shaw said.

Root looked at her, clearly taken back by Shaw’s words. Her mouth opened to say something, but closed again and then she looked away, at the table before picking up the container the soup was in with both hands.

“If you bring that spoon anywhere near my face one more time, it’s gonna end up in a really unpleasant place.” Root said and took a long sip straight from the container. Shaw couldn’t help the amused smirk that was creeping onto her face, as if Root was demonstrating the exact point Shaw had just made.

When Root lowered the soup she had some on the corner of her mouth which Shaw immediately swiped away with her finger.

“You ready to go?” Shaw asked.

“Absolutely.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Shaw has got her. And she's not intending on letting go <3
> 
> So this is kind of a small chapter, but that's because I chopped in half when I realised what comes next deserves it's own chapter :P mwahahaha
> 
> thoughts? feelings? happy? sad? everything in between?
> 
> xx


	45. Everything

“I don’t think I can sleep.” Root said as Shaw walked into their bedroom seeing Root sprawled across the bed, an arm thrown across her face.

“We don’t have to” Shaw said to her pulling off her shirt and jeans then climbing onto the bed next to Root, moving so close their bodies were touching, and draping herself over her wife so they were skin to skin. Her hand giving Root’s side a light squeeze, an _I’m here_ squeeze.

Root sighed.

“It keeps playing over and over in my mind.” Root said. “The look on his face, that won’t ever go away.”

“No,” Shaw agreed “But neither will the look you saw on my face when I figured out we had married each other.”

“That’s true” Root mumbled.

“It won’t haunt you as much as you think it will right now” Shaw said.

“How do you know?” Root asked.

“Because they never do” Shaw said “They fade eventually, the more you push them from your mind, the more they disappear.”

Root moved her arm from her face and looked at Shaw, who was comfortably using Root as a body pillow again.

“But his face…” Root said quietly.

“Do you know what happens when you start to forget,” Shaw said almost absentmindedly “the feelings detach, and you’re left with something that once happened.”

“And if they don’t?”

“Then you’re thinking about it too much” Shaw said with a playful smirk as she glanced up at Root.

“Or I don’t have a personality disorder” Root said with an eyebrow raised and Shaw just lay her head back down on Root with a grin.

“How are you doing though, actually?” Shaw asked quietly.

“When I can feel you I feel a lot more untouchable.” Root said softly.

“Really?” Shaw asked running her fingertips lightly over Root’s stomach. “Like a safety net?”

“More like a lifeline.” Root said staring up at the ceiling. “I think you pulled me out.”

“I might have your hand but I’m not sure you’re entirely out yet” Shaw said gently.

“Take my hand.” Root said. “Take my whole life too.”

Shaw sat up and Root looked at her. It was obvious she was thinking about something, Root knew that much, from the way Shaw’s eyes were flickering across Root’s face.

Suddenly Shaw climbed off the bed and went into the bathroom. She looked at herself in the mirror and frowned, leaning her arms against the sink. What would bring Root back, she thought. What would chase the image of Daniel out of her mind?

She knew what.

She just wondered if she actually had the guts to do it. But realising the situation she found a smirk on her face as she walked back into the bedroom.

“Give me your ring.” she said to Root who stared at her slightly confused. Shaw walked around to Root’s side of the bed and held her hand out for it.

“Kind of a blunt way to ask for a divorce, Sameen” Root said with a hint of a frown on her face.

“Just shut up, and give it to me.” Shaw said and Root slid the ring off her finger hesitantly and handed it to Shaw.

Shaw looked at the ring as she turned it around in her fingers, running a her thumb lightly over the black diamond.

“I can’t tell what you’re thinking, right now” Root said putting an arm behind her head as she watched Shaw closely.

“I’m thinking about you.” Shaw said still staring at the ring. “And I’m thinking about this.” Shaw said holding up the ring to Root and looking at her.

“Doubting your choice?” Root said almost with a smirk on her face, Shaw rolled her eyes at the humour in Root’s tone, quietly glad that it was making it’s come back though.

“No, more along the lines of…us.” Shaw said.

“Okay,” Root said slowly. “That’s both vague and slightly ominous.”

Shaw raised an eyebrow. “Ominous?” she said, knowing that whatever she was trying to do right now was more than definitely distracting Root from where her head had been a couple of minutes ago.

“You know what I said to you earlier?” Shaw asked. “Before Harold interrupted.”

Root just nodded.

“Well I meant it.” Shaw said. “And I know you don’t think it’s important to even like yourself, but it made me think…that this,” Shaw gestured with a finger between herself and Root. “This doesn’t just work because we have a thing for each other, you can’t put everything into someone else and expect that to be enough, the reason we’re still together is because of you.” Shaw said looking straight at Root. “You do a lot of things, you’re half of this dynamic, if you didn’t do all those things it would be different, it wouldn’t work…I’m just saying that it’s what we have _together_ that makes this work and because of that Root, you gotta give a damn about yourself.”

Root’s eyes were fixed on Shaw as a silence washed between them, Root looked away.

“You know what She said to me when Harry interrupted us” Root said quietly. “She said, part of falling in love with someone is actually falling in love with yourself.”

“I think She’s been reading self help books for you” Shaw said with an amused smile on her face. “But She’s right, as always.”

“But I don’t get that” Root said “Why should I matter?”

“Because you matter to me,” Shaw said. “And by default because you care about me, you also have to care about what matters to me.”

“I do care” Root said with a slight frown.

“But you don’t care about yourself, which is top of my list.” Shaw said. “And I can’t figure that out, because you have so much light in there.”

Shaw ran her fingers up Root’s arm, Root watched her. But then she stopped and gave Root’s arm a light pat with her hand.

“But,” Shaw said bluntly. “I can’t _make_ you love yourself, I can’t really make you do anything actually…that’s the problem with stubborn people, they suck at budging.”

Shaw stood up off the bed and sighed, shutting her eyes for a brief moment before opening them and looking at Root.

“You’re impossible” Shaw said a smirk of near amusement twitching at her mouth. “But thankfully I like a challenge, and nothing is actually impossible.”

Shaw let her eyes lock onto Root’s for a couple of brief seconds before she looked at the ground, and bit her lip as a smile threatened to ruin her perfectly neutral guard she had up. Then, without skipping another beat Shaw dropped onto one knee and held the ring up between her thumb and index finger.

Root’s eyes immediately widened and she bolted upright, her mouth falling open slightly as she looked at Shaw.

“What are you…” the words fell from her lips before she could even try and stop them.

“I know we’re already married, but this is the one part that has remained a mystery” Shaw said “And mysteries are great, but only if they get solved, or it makes for kind’ve a shitty story… and I know how much you like throwing the wife card around to strangers so” Shaw looked at Root letting a smile play at the corners of her mouth. Root had a hand loosely over her mouth as she stared at Shaw, still wide eyed, still fucking beautiful as ever.

“Root, we’re stuck with each other til death do us part, and it turns out I’m more than okay with that because despite the fact I find you possibly the most annoying person on the planet, you’re also one of the most intelligent, and interesting …not because you’re mildly psychotic, but because you feel _everything_ , and you let yourself feel everything” Shaw paused to focus on Root. “You manage to care so deeply about everyone except yourself, so as your number one fan and favourite lover, I want to make you realise how worthy of love you actually are…” Shaw held up the ring in front of Root “If you’ll let me? Because no one so unabashedly audacious should go a fucking second without realising amazing they are.”

Root smiled, her cheeks were flushed pink and her hand dropped away from her mouth.

“Well considering that’s already my ring” Root said with a smirk as her hand reached for it, but Shaw moved it away.

“You gotta say yes first,” Shaw said with a smile and Root rolled her eyes grinning.

“Yes Sameen” Root said with a smirk as she plucked the ring from Shaw’s fingers and slipped it back on her finger. “I love you.”

“Mhm” Shaw said with a smile as Root stood up and pulled Shaw up from where she had still been kneeling. “How’d I do? Because there was no rehearsal for that like ever, and I’m pretty sure there’s supposed to be.”

“That was perfect.” Root said sliding her arms around Shaw’s neck, their hips bumping together. “I don’t know when you got so good at this marriage thing, I’m kinda jealous.”

Shaw just smirked as she looked at Root’s eyes, seeing a familiar light back behind them again. Root was happy, like actually happy Shaw could tell.

“Yeah well, no one likes an amateur” Shaw said putting her arms around Root’s waist. Root looked at Shaw, that look behind her eyes, and then something else. Her lips parted as if she were going to say something, but instead she just leaned forward and closed the gap between them entirely. Her lips touched Shaw’s lightly in a gentle kiss, then the second they started pulling away both of them moved back in hungrily their lips crashing together in a mess of sudden passion.

“Mm fuck” Shaw mumbled as they broke away from each other to breathe.

“I missed that” Root said softly.

“I didn’t realise how much” Shaw said, suddenly realising that they hadn’t kissed each other for days, they’d barely even touched. But now it was like that wall Root had put up was finally coming down, her hands on Shaw’s face and neck, looking at her with that look, that Root _look_. It was both soft and intense and she only ever looked at Shaw like that.

“You okay?” Shaw asked out of habit from the past days more than anything.

“Yeah” Root said and Shaw smiled. “Now I’m even better.” Root added seeing that smile spread across Shaw’s face.

“Loser” Shaw said and rolled her eyes, the smile still stuck on her face.

“Asshole.” Root shot back and kissed the corner of Shaw’s smile.

“What do you wanna do?” Shaw asked and glanced at the clock behind Root. “It’s only midnight, and you don’t wanna sleep.”

“I kind of just want to stare at you” Root said and Shaw raised an eyebrow.

“Does that leave me free to do whatever I want, like eat and finger myself?” Shaw asked and Root just rolled her eyes.

“You’re such a boy” Root said Shaw smirked.

“Boys suck.”

“Yeah,” Root agreed “but you do a fair amount of sucking too.”

“Oh now you’re in that kind of mood?” Shaw asked leaning closer to Root, nudging her face to the side with her nose and kissing Root’s neck just under her jaw lightly.

“I don’t know” Root said letting Shaw get a few kisses in down her neck, before she wrapped Shaw’s hair around her hand and yanked it, tipping Shaw’s head back a little. “I just killed a guy, and then my wife proposed to me…”

“That sounds like a hell of a day” Shaw said and Root just looked at her, before leaning in and kissing Shaw again.

“She also spoon fed me soup” Root mumbled against Shaw’s lips with a smile creeping onto her face. Shaw almost spluttered with amusement against Root’s face as she leaned back a little to look at her.

“I was _trying_ to be useful” Shaw said “You were shaking like you’d been on heroine your whole life.”

“If you’d just kissed me it would have sorted the situation out a whole lot faster” Root admitted and Shaw rolled her eyes.

“I wasn’t sure if you wanted me too” Shaw said “I didn’t want you to bite me.”

“Do you want me to bite you now?” Root arched and eyebrow.

“Maybe” Shaw said and Root just pushed her back down onto the bed before climbing on top of her and pinning her hands up by her head.

“Thank you” Root said quietly looking at Shaw softly.

“What for?” Shaw asked.

“For being here” Root said “for being you.”

“I wish I could give you more” Shaw said staring back up at Root with dark eyes “but I can’t give you something I don’t got.”

“You’re enough, just as you are.” Root said and Shaw just looked at her, purposefully not saying a word. “And…I guess I am too.”

Shaw smiled. “Damn right.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ooooh my god <3
> 
> pls tell me what you think/feel
> 
> on a completely random note a couple of songs I've been writing these past few chapters to lately are:  
> -Let Me Love You (DJ Snake)  
> \- Say You Love Me (Jessie Ware)  
> \- Let It Out (Frances) 


	46. Half Four

When Shaw opened her eyes and heard the sound of crunching and voices talking softly. Letting out a soft groan she rolled over, light burning her eyes as she noticed all the lights in the room were still on. She rolled into Root’s leg and threw her arm out from under the covers, her hand hitting a box. Shutting her eyes again she could still feel the light seeping under her lashes, so she rubbed her eyes and looked up at Root.

“What time is it?” she mumbled still half asleep.

“Half four” Root said her hand finding Shaw’s head and stroking her hair lightly.

“I don’t remember falling asleep” Shaw muttered and glanced at Root’s laptop that was on her lap, then down at the box of animal crackers that her hand was rustling in.

“You were pretty burned out,” Root said “then you had an orgasm and fell asleep like thirty seconds later.”

“Sorry” Shaw mumbled and Root just smiled.

“It’s okay,” Root said “To be honest, it was cute.”

“Really?” Shaw said and looked at Root’s laptop screen, her eyes still blurry from sleep. “Are you watching Adventure Time?”

Root glanced at her screen then down at Shaw. “It’s actually a really good show.”

“I know” Shaw said with a smirk.

“You remind of Marceline” Root said stuffing an animal cracker into her mouth.

“Let me guess,” Shaw said and rolled onto her stomach so she was looking at Root. “Princess Bubblegum?”

Root just grinned with a mouthful of crackers.

“Well I’m clearly not missing anything important” Shaw said with a yawn.

“I had to do something” Root protested “My distraction fell asleep.”

“I’m awake now, Root” Shaw said tiredly running her hand over her face. “What do you need me for? Coffee? A back rub? Helping you demolish those animal crackers?”

“All of the above?” Root asked and Shaw just lay back down again, turning over and resting her head on Root’s shoulder.

“Or I could just shut my eyes” Shaw said fighting to keep her eyes open despite the light.

“Don’t do that” Root said looking at Shaw then kissing her temple lightly.

“That’s not gonna keep me awake” Shaw said and Root smiled a little, then waved an animal cracker in front of Shaw’s face. Shaw let out a light sigh then snatched the cracker from Root’s hand and stuffed it into her mouth, chewing it for a brief couple of seconds before stopping.

“I’m too tired to chew” Shaw said through a muffled mouthful.

“Well that’s a first” Root said and Shaw pulled herself so she was sitting up, staring sleepily into space, trying to win the battle against her eyelids which were putting up a determined fight to close.

“How many people have you slept with?” Root asked suddenly.

Shaw slowly turned to look at her with a confused frown on her face.

“Really?” Shaw asked and Root just nibbled on an animal cracker, looking at her through her dark lashes.

“I don’t know.” Shaw said with a loose shrug.

“I don’t believe that.” Root said and Shaw just stared at her.

“Are you supposed to count?”

“Wow,” Root smirked “That many?”

“Root” Shaw said rubbing her eyes, everything felt heavy with sleep but after that question she felt slightly more awake, which is probably why Root asked it. “Why don’t you guess?”

Root basically smirked as she pushed her laptop off her legs and sat up so that she and Shaw were right next to each other.

“That seems like a dangerous idea” Root said her voice low and Shaw smirked briefly.

“Scared you’re gonna offend me?” Shaw asked and Root rolled her eyes.

“12” Root said without further thought and Shaw automatically raised an eyebrow.

“Twelve?” she repeated and Root just looked at her.

“Was that way off?” Root asked.

“It’s higher than I thought you would go for me…” Shaw admitted and Root bit her lip.

“I just figured…you might have just used people for…” Root stopped and picked at her finger “at least when you were younger.”

“I guess we’ll never know” Shaw said.

“You really have no idea?” Root asked looking at her sideways.

“No” Shaw said honestly, “They were just _people_ it never really meant anything.”

Root looked back down at her hands.

“Until now” Shaw added and Root smiled to herself.

“What were you like?” Root asked.

“Exactly the way I was when you met me, except I made more stupid choices…arguably” Shaw said.

“Did you date any pretty girls?” Root asked.

“No” Shaw said and paused. “There was this one girl though,”

Root looked back at her intrigued, and Shaw watched her closely with a small smile playing on her face.

“The first thing I noticed were her legs” Shaw continued “and then her eyes, she would try really hard to get me to go out with her, but she wasn’t my type, she was always happy… but then one day I saw her sad and it was the weirdest thing, I wanted to pull her back up, so I asked her what was wrong, and she just looked at me and said ‘buy me a drink and I’ll tell you’,”

Root suddenly felt her heart catch in her chest as she realised that Shaw was talking about her. She didn’t interrupt though, she didn’t dare speak. She let the small smug and happy smile creep onto her face and listened.

“I bought her that drink,” Shaw said with a smile on her lips “and then I went back to her place and we slept together, and after I told her that I didn’t do relationships, and she said she didn’t care, but if I wanted to sleep with her again then it had to be her and her only.”

Root smirked and Shaw looked at her.

“And that’s why I never dated pretty girls, they’re batshit crazy… but the weird part, is that I ended up married to that very one.” Shaw said and her hand snaked across the bed sheets until it found Root’s.

“You’re disgustingly cute you know that right?” Root said and Shaw just rolled her eyes.

“You asked.” Shaw said and Root just smirked. “So do I get to guess your number?”

Root raised an eyebrow and avoided looking at Shaw. “If you want.”

Shaw watched her carefully. “Should I do a deduction based on your personality?”

Root smiled and rolled her eyes at Shaw without saying anything.

“I don’t think it’s that many,” Shaw said with a shrug “you were by yourself for a lifetime with a whole lot of simmering trust issues, plus you hate men, so that would only leave women and considering you can barely accept yourself now…I can’t even imagine what kind of state you were in years ago, so there was probably one girl that gave you a really good time and then maybe a couple of others that you used to test your kink out on” Shaw said with a playful smirk and Root just stared at her.

“Am I close?” Shaw asked and Root looked away again.

“Actually, that was…pretty much exactly right” Root said and looked back at her. Shaw blinked a couple of times as that registered to her, but Root was still almost avoiding her eyes.

“You know I don’t give a crap right?” Shaw said and moved her head trying to catch Root’s eyes.

“Yeah, I know that” Root said softly and looked into Shaw’s eyes.

“It’s strange the things that you get insecure about,” Shaw said and shook her head a little “you have the _weirdest_ kinks and you don’t care, but you get weird about how many people you’ve slept with.”

Root laughed a little and stuffed a cracker into her mouth.

“Let me tell you now,” Shaw said “you got nothing to worry about in that department, okay?”

Root looked at her with an eyebrow arched still chewing the cracker.

“Oh I know” Root said.

“Good, because had I met you sooner there would have been no one else, ever, and that wouldn’t have been an issue” Shaw said and Root smiled.

“That’s… quite a compliment”

“Yeah,” Shaw said shifting onto her knees in front of Root and looking at her, putting her hand on Root’s neck running her fingers over it lightly. “So take it.”

“Okay” Root said and leaned in and kissed Shaw softly, letting their lips graze against each others softly, before pulling back a little. “Did you really think I wasn’t your type?”

Shaw smirked against Root’s lips and looked at her, their faces so close she could see all the dark flecks in Root’s iris. Her eyes were so much lighter up close, they almost seemed golden.

“I mean…what was I supposed to think after you tortured and kidnapped me?” Shaw asked and Root just grinned.

“That we were soul mates” Root said. “Duh.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> keeping it nice and cute for another chapter to bring down from all that exhausting angst ;)
> 
> thoughts? feelings? 
> 
> also running an idea past you guys, I've been playing around with maybe doing a prequel to this around when they first started sleeping with each other... thoughts on that? I think that might be quite amusing ;)


	47. Don't Call Her Princess

“I need to borrow your car” Root said and dangled Shaw’s keys over her head where she was laying sprawled out on the living room floor, in gym gear, sweaty from a workout, with Bear laying on top of her. “Also, what am I looking at right now?” Root asked with a smile as she looked at Bear then at Shaw who practically had her arms around him, cuddling.

“You can’t borrow it.” Shaw said immediately, her arm shooting up towards her keys. “And he mounted me, okay.”

“Mounted?” Root repeated with a smirk and Shaw rolled her eyes, wiggling her fingers at her keys.

“Give them to me” Shaw said. “You’re not even allowed to touch them.”

It was Root’s turn to roll her eyes as she let the keys drop into Shaw’s waiting hand.

“Can you come with me then?” Root asked. “I need it.”

“What for?” Shaw frowned using her other hand to run up and down Bear’s back.

“She has a job for me” Root said and Shaw kept staring at Root.

“You’re _not_ dumping a body in my car” Shaw said “that’s forbidden, there are rules”

“I didn’t say anything about a body, Sameen” Root smiled.

“Then what?”

“She wants me to go shopping.” Root said with a shrug.

“What kind of shopping?” Shaw narrowed her eyes and Root just looked at her.

“We’re low on some essentials” Root said and Shaw raised an eyebrow.

“Like carrots?”

Root frowned with an almost amused yet equally shocked look on her face. “Like rope and latex gloves.”

“Oh” Shaw said pushing Bear off her stomach and sitting up. “Now that’s my kinda shopping.”

Root crouched down as Bear tried to command her attention looking put out after Shaw had tossed him off her. She kissed the end of Bear’s nose and let him lick her face.

“So you’re coming?” Root asked.

“As the sole owner of the car you need, yes.” Shaw said and got to her feet. “I just need to go change.” Shaw said but Root just tossed her a pair of jeans and top that she had already collected before coming to ask.

Shaw grabbed the clothes and looked at Root. “You knew I’d say yes.”

“Of course I did” Root said watching Shaw as she got changed, letting her eyes linger on the other woman’s perfectly toned body, watching her biceps flex, as she pulled the shirt on, the way the tight material of the jeans got stuck halfway up her thighs and she had to do a little jump to wiggle them over the muscles.

“You wet yet?” Shaw smirked as she did up the zipper of her jeans noticing that Root had been staring at her, mouth ajar, the entire time.

“Shut up.” Root said and Shaw rolled her eyes as she grabbed Root’s leather jacket and pulled it on.

“We’ll be back soon, Bear” Root called out as she followed Shaw out to the car.

“He doesn’t speak English, dumbass” Shaw said as she slid into the drivers seat and Root climbed in beside her.

“I think he’s bilingual” Root said and Shaw just looked at her.

“He’s a dog.”

“He’s also a scuba certified, which is more than I can say for you” Root said and Shaw just smiled.

“Touche” she said and started the engine, leaning back and smiling… at the car.

“I almost regret getting you this” Root said as she leaned her head back on the seat and glanced over at Shaw.

“Why would you say something like that” Shaw said running her hands over the wheel proudly.

“Because” Root said “You’re gonna ruin the upholstery with your drool.”

Shaw looked over at her and smirked. “Oh it’s not gonna be _that_ that ruins the upholstery.”

Root glanced between Shaw’s legs, then back at her, before rolling her eyes.

“Just drive the damn car.” Root said.

*

“Not that I don’t totally dig doing these home depot runs with you, but why exactly does She need us to get all this stuff?” Shaw asked as she stood on the end of the cart letting Root push her around, as she would reach out and grab anything that she saw fit.

“She’s got a little job for us, I think” Root said tossing a pair of wire cutters into the cart.

“A job that involves this much acid?” Shaw asked glancing back at the cart. “What are we dissolving a body? Because I don’t wanna do that in our tub.”

“She has a plan, Sam” Root said throwing a packet of zip ties into the cart too. Shaw turned around so they were looking at each other, still holding the edge of the cart whilst Root pushed it.

“Are we kidnapping someone?” Shaw asked. Root rolled her eyes.

“Stop asking questions.”

“Or are you planning some kind of really kinky sex fest?” Shaw asked as a man walked by and glanced at them both with an eyebrow raised. Root looked at him as he walked off then glanced back at Shaw.

“You’re going to have to wait and find out.” Root said and Shaw just stared at her.

“She hasn’t told you yet, has she?”

“Maybe” Root said.

Shaw jumped off the cart and smirked as she wandered down the aisle ahead of Root before disappearing out of sight. Root rolled her eyes and went back to collecting the things that The Machine was asking her to get. Then suddenly she felt something pressed against her lower back, it felt like the barrel of a gun.

She automatically let go of the cart.

“Hands up” the voice said from behind her, and Root started to smirk, lifting her hands up by her head and slowly starting to turn around, looking at Shaw with an amused expression on her face before glancing down and looking at the water pistol she was holding against her.

“What are you arresting me for, Officer?” Root asked innocently and Shaw just stared at her.

“Unlawful conduct.” Shaw said the water gun still aimed at Root’s stomach.

“Oh?” Root asked “I think you’ve got the wrong gal”

“I don’t think so.” Shaw said and Root quirked an eyebrow.

“And what exactly did I do, unlawfully?”

Shaw pushed the gun against Root forcing her against the shelves behind her, moving right up close so she was in Root’s space. Pressing the nose of the pistol lightly into Root’s stomach, looking at her closely, watching her, and then moving the gun from between them and leaning in to kiss her.

Root melted against her easily the second their lips touched, completely unaware of their surroundings she kissed Shaw back, deeply. Her hand moving up to Shaw’s face pulling her closer, wanting to feel her. Her knee slipping between Shaw’s legs as they kissed, but the second her knee grazed Shaw’s crotch, Shaw pulled back with a smirk.

“That was pretty unlawful, for a public place” Shaw said and Root just stared at her slightly flushed.

“Hardly” Root said. “If you wanna see unlawful then get back here.”

Shaw raised an eyebrow then got distracted by the nail guns that were on the shelf behind Root.

“Ooh I want one” Shaw said “They look like they would _hurt_.” Shaw said grabbing a box and dropping it into the cart.

“You wanna test that out?” Root asked lifting an eyebrow.

“On you?” Shaw asked.

“I was thinking on you” Root smirked. “Since you already have a hole in your hand.”

“Your fault.” Shaw said and shook her head.

“Maybe, but now we match” Root said and grabbed her hand, putting it over the spot where the bullet hit her chest.

Shaw stared at her before rolling her eyes and yanking her hand back.

“Worst matching ever.”

“Couples who get shot together” Root said with a shrug.

“Die?” Shaw finished and Root looked amused.

“Well we both know that you don’t die, do you tiger?” Root said and nudged her.

“Stop trying to give me pet names” Shaw growled, even though she deep down really didn’t care.

“Why not muffin?” Root said purposefully being annoying.

“Banana nut crunch.” Shaw said suddenly, turning to Root. Root just looked at her with a frown.

“What does that even mean?”

“That’s what Lionel calls you” Shaw said with a shrug “Among other things, and he’s right.”

“Banana nut crunch?” Root echoed.

“Yeah” Shaw said with a smirk as she did the loopy hand signal around her head and Root whacked her. “Superpowered nutball.”

Root’s eyes widened. “He calls me _that_ too?”

“You gotta a lotta nicknames for your level of crazy” Shaw said and Root just stared at her.

“What does he call you?”

“Maybelline” Shaw smirked and Root just rolled her eyes. “Or Shaw.”

“I’m not even going to start on how unfair that is” Root said with a huff folding her arms across her chest.

“Whatever you say, princess” Shaw smirked and kept pushing the cart. Root didn’t move, she stared at Shaw as she walked off.

“Princess?” Root repeated and Shaw turned around.

“It was either that or fruit loop” Shaw said “Now can we proceed. I’m hungry.”

Root walked over to her, their faces dangerously close. “Call me Princess one more time…”

Shaw couldn’t tell how much of a warning that really was, or whether Root was actually asking. Either way she grinned.

“Princess” she said through a perfect smile, and Root just smiled back before leaning in their lips almost touching, as she grabbed Shaw’s shoulder and dug her thumb into the pressure point just hard enough for Shaw to hiss a wince in her ear.

“Oh you don’t like that?” Shaw asked brushing Root off her and rubbing her shoulder blade. “Whatever,” Shaw said “I’m definitely trying that again later when you’re handcuffed.”

“I’ll asphyxiate you with your L’oreal locks” Root hissed and Shaw just grinned.

“That sounds like fun.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> absolutely exhausted with a crazy busy week coming up...but I had to write something for you guys :p
> 
> excited about the prospect of a prequel in the pipelines, thank you so much for all your support and loyalty to this story....it's truly amazing to see, and very touching!
> 
> what do you think these idiots are up to next? ;)


	48. Blast From The Past

Shaw was carefully loading the supplies into the trunk of her car, while Root stood to the side staring off into the distance with a slight frown on her face. Shaw had only moments ago scolded Root for trying to sit on the hood of the car as she waited for Shaw to meticulously place the supplies into the car, making sure none of them were going to cause any damage…to the car.

“You’re gonna break your face if you keep frowning like that” Shaw said without even looking over at Root.

“She’s trying to tell me something” Root said and Shaw slammed the trunk shut and folded her arms as she followed Root’s gaze.

“Which is what exactly?” Shaw asked “Did we forget the plyers?”

Root tore her eyes away from the license plate they had been fixed on and looked at Shaw.

“The owner of that car” Root said and nodded towards it.

“What about ‘em?” Shaw asked squinting at the car seeing that no one was inside it.

“She’s not saying” Root said.

“Well _I_ say we leave” Shaw said and Root just rolled her eyes.

“She wouldn’t mention him for no reason, Sam” Root said and Shaw just sighed.

“You can walk home then.” Shaw said fishing around in her pocket for the keys, but before she could take another step Root grabbed her arm.

“Wait there he is” she said and Shaw spun around looking at the guy that was walking towards the car.

“ _Him_?” Shaw said incredulously as she looked at the guy, bed hair, Star Trek t-shirt, glasses, head hunched over looking at his phone, a plastic bag dangling from his arm.

“She says we should talk to him” Root said staring at him with a frown. Shaw growled under her breath and popped the trunk back open, looking at the supplies she had just packed in there and reached for the packet of zip ties, ripping it open with her teeth and grabbing a couple out.

“Should I bring the nail gun?” Shaw asked and glanced at Root who just stared at her, before shaking her head once.

“Why would you need that?”

“In case he starts to bore me to death with his geek talk” Shaw said with a shrug and shut the boot again.

“Ouch” Root said and Shaw rolled her eyes as she started walking towards the car.

“You talk about computer nerd stuff, not space battle nerd stuff” Shaw pointed out.

“Around you” Root said with a smirk and Shaw glanced at her with an eyebrow raised.

“Did She ask you two to talk so that you can have some kind of nerd convention about Darth Vader or is he actually useful?” Shaw said walking up to his door and knocking on the window with her knuckles. Root went to the other side of the car and rested her hand on the roof.

“Sam, Darth Vader is from Star Wars” Root said and Shaw rolled her eyes as she leaned down and yanked his door open.

“What the hell are you doing?” the guy asked looking terrified, trying to lean away but then seeing Root’s body blocking the other door.

“Good question” Shaw said “Get out.”

“Why?” he asked but Shaw just grabbed him by the arm roughly and pulled him from his seat, shoving him against the side of his car.

“Do you need help?” Shaw asked her voice almost bored as she let go of the fistful of his shirt. He glanced at her face, then down a little then back to meet her eyes.

“Um…”

Shaw frowned. “What’s your name, loser?”

“Garret” he said, his eyes still wide with terror as Shaw let out a sigh.

“Seriously,” she said looking over the car at Root “what do we need this asshat for?”

“I don’t know” Root shrugged “She still won’t tell me… I guess we have to figure it out for ourselves.”

Shaw groaned and looked back at Garret.

“Turn around” she ordered. “Hands behind your back, and don’t get excited.

“Are you arresting me?” he asked. “Are you even a cop?”

“If you don’t stop talking right now I will knock you unconscious or put so much duct tape around your mouth that your head will explode.” Shaw said and shoved him to start walking as soon as she put the zip ties tightly around his wrists.

Root smirked as she watched Shaw hustle him back towards her car.

“Ugh” Shaw groaned as she looked at her car with a pout “this lump won’t fit in the trunk with all our gear, he’s gonna have to go in the back.”

“Of the Ferrari?” Garret’s eyes widened more.

“I guess it’s your lucky day” Shaw said shoving him into the car then slamming the seat back. “Unless you piss me off, then it’ll be your last.”

“Oh my god” Garret panicked “what is happening, who are you people? who is she?”

Root got in the seat in front of him and Shaw climbed into the drivers seat.

“What did I say about talking, Garret?” Shaw said and he immediately shut up. “I hope you like going fast.”

“Actually I’m…” Garret started but his voice was immediately drowned out by the engine turning on, and then an incredibly dangerous and very fast reverse out of the car park before Shaw took off, at full speed down the road.

“Where are we taking him?” Shaw asked glancing at Root.

“Safe house?” Root said “We’re gonna have to question him somewhere, and I’d rather it not be our living room.”

“You live with this psychopath?” Garret piped up to Root who just raised an eyebrow at Shaw and smirked.

“Actually she’s a sociopath” Root pointed out “Which is why she won’t care if she kills you… I’m the psychopath.”

“Great” Garret said sarcastically. “And you’re gonna do what to me exactly?”

“Cut your tongue out” Shaw said bluntly and he stared at her in horror from the backseat.

“She’s kidding” Root said.

“Is she though?” Garret asked and Shaw just smirked. “Seriously, I’m sorry….I talk a lot when I’m nervous”

“Please,” Shaw said sarcastically “Don’t tell me more.”

She took a hard left and heard him fall to the side behind them.

“If you damage the car you’re paying” Shaw said and Garret just groaned in pain. “We should have duct taped the loser.” Shaw said as she pulled into the car park at the safe house and got out of the car, grabbing Garret out too.

“Probably should have put a hood over his head too,” Root said “Did you see where we came?”

“No” Garret almost shouted “And even if I did, the stress of the situation will probably make me forget.”

“Good nerd” Shaw cooed and shoved him towards the door that Root unbolted and let them in. “Now sit down and I’ll try not to shoot you.” she said grabbing the closest chair and pushing him towards it. Shaw walked over to the table and pulled her jacket off, letting out an unimpressed sigh.

“Not how I thought our afternoon was going” she said her voice low as Root came over to her.

“I don’t know why She won’t tell me about him” Root frowned her eyes absentmindedly running over Shaw’s shoulders.

“If he doesn’t say something useful in the next five minutes I’m gonna start doing things Harold won’t like.” Shaw said and folded her arms. Root smirked.

“Good thing Harry isn’t here then” she said “but Sameen, he doesn’t appear to look like he’s gonna hurt anyone.”

“Neither do you on a good day, but we all know that’s not true” Shaw said flashed a cheeky smirk at Root as she walked back over to Garret.

“Are you ready not to die?” she asked and he just stared at her bewildered.

“Is that your girlfriend or something?” Garret asked Shaw as he stared at Root.

Shaw frowned at the question and Root arched an eyebrow, coming towards them both twisting a thing piece of wiry string around her fingers.

“Wife, actually.” Root corrected him and he stared between them baffled.

“Wait, you’re _married_?” he said in disbelief.

“Yeah” Shaw said “so stop checking her out, or I’ll scoop out your eyes.”

Garret swallowed hard and Root just stared at him.

“Do you know what this is?” she asked and pulled the string tight between her fingers. Garret aggressively shook his head.

“It’s a garrote,” she said “kinda funny actually, it sounds like your name… it’s used in the military for execution.”

“Or here, on you, if you don’t start answering questions” Shaw said with a unpleasant smile. “Because I have things to do this afternoon, including my wife and to be quite honest, I can’t be bothered dealing with you…at all, but she insisted.”

“What do you want?” Garret said looking between them, sweat starting to bead on his forehead. “I honestly don’t think I know anything that can help you…” he said and looked back at Root the briefest frown crossing his face before he looked away again.

“What?” Shaw said catching his look.

“Nothing” he said “What are you even after?”

“Answers.” Shaw said and Garret glanced at Root again for a brief second.

“Okay, what is it?” Shaw asked catching the look again, and glancing at Root who was sitting on the arm of the still holding the garrote in one hand, and spinning a roll of duct tape around a finger on the other.

“Do you two need some alone time or something?” Shaw asked impatiently “Why do you keep lookin at her like that?”

Garret ignored Shaw and just stared at Root, who wasn’t paying any attention to him. He tilted his head to the side to get a better look at her.

“Sam?” he asked, and suddenly Shaw’s hand was around his throat.

“How do you know my name?” she said through gritted teeth.

“I wasn’t….I wasn’t talking to you” Garret said shakily and suddenly Shaw’s hand released him as she took a step back and looked over at Root, who was suddenly paying attention.

“S-Samantha Groves?” Garret asked and Root just stared at him, her jaw locked, her eyes burning holes into the guy in front of them. Shaw stared at Root in confusion, seeing the look on her face and knowing this was coming as an unwelcome surprise to her as well.

“A word?” Shaw said her voice low walking from the room and taking Root’s arm dragging her out too.

They stepped into the kitchen where they would be out of ear shot and Shaw just stared at Root.

“What the hell?” she asked. “Who is that?’

Root shook her head. “It can’t be” Root said quietly and Shaw stepped forward, trying to get into Root’s head by closing the space between them.

“Root” she said quietly trying to meet her eyes. “What’s going on?”

Root finally managed to look directly at Shaw, a small frown still pressed to her forehead.

“Garret Stones” she said and shook her head “he was in my class…”

“Your class?” Shaw repeated.

“When I was twelve.” Root finished and Shaw’s eyes widened a little.

“Are you okay?” were the first words that came from Shaw’s mouth next, surprising both of them and working to snap Root out of her little daze of confusion. She looked at Shaw, seeing her, the slightest hint of concern behind those dark eyes. She nodded, and let a hand lightly touch Shaw’s shoulder.

“Okay, well, he somehow remembers you” Shaw said and Root chewed her lip.

“If I remember correctly, he used to have a thing for me” Root said and Shaw raised both her eyebrows.

“A thing?”

Root nodded.

“Like a twelve year old romance thing?”

“I never really spoke to him,” Root said “he liked computers.”

“Wow, true love.” Shaw teased her and Root just shook her head. “Okay, so Vader boy is definitely not here to kill you”

“Unless he still loves me and wants to marry me” Root said with a smirk.

“Well, he’ll have to go through me first” Shaw said “and he won’t get through me.”

*

“I wasn’t wrong, was I?” Garret said as they both walked back into the room.

“No, you’re not” Root said and stood in front of where he was sitting with her arms folded. “But I don’t go by that name anymore, the only Sam around here is that one” Root nodded towards Shaw.

Garret glanced over at her. “Samantha married a Sam?”

Shaw rolled her eyes in disgust.

“What do you want with me, Garret?” Root asked and he just stared at her.

“You’re the one who kidnapped me, Sa-“ he stopped halfway through her name and just shook his head. “Everyone thought you were dead.”

“Good.” Root said and Garret frowned.

“How is that a good thing?” he asked and Shaw flopped onto the couch realising this wasn’t going anywhere, any time fast.

“I was always on the outskirts, Garret” Root said with a frown “you know that… then after Hanna” the look on Root’s face changed to something somewhat pained at the memory, Shaw automatically wanted to get up. It’s like she was fucking programmed to want to get close to Root every time something was threatening her perkiness. It was an annoying default Shaw realised she couldn’t get rid of.

But this guy, Garret, maybe The Machine was smarter than she had ever given it credit for. What if he was here… for Root. The Machine knew Root had been having a hard time, what if he was here for her, to help her? Shaw didn’t realise her gaze was so intensely fixed on Garret until he cleared his throat a little and she blinked.

“C-could you tell your wife to maybe stop staring at me like that?” he asked Root “It’s kinda terrifying.”

Root turned around and looked at Shaw who just stared at her innocently.

“Do you live here now?” Root asked him and he shook his head.

“I’m visiting my aunt and uncle” he said. “I live in Chicago,” he paused “I guess you’ve…settled down.”

Root raised an eyebrow and Shaw watched her carefully “I guess you could say that.” Root said.

“Did you get tired of running?” Garret asked and Root just stared at the ground. Shaw could feel that Root was comfortable around him, the threat of him trying to kill either of them was basically negative zero at this point. It was the way he looked at her, he fucking cared about her still. After all this time. That much was obvious, whether Root could see it or not would be an entirely different argument, but Shaw could tell. His voice was softer, he didn’t move his eyes off her, he didn’t pressure her to answer any questions.

“You can’t run forever” Root said and looked back at him. “And then I met that firecracker,” Root said tilting her head towards Shaw “and it felt like finally I could stop.”

“Are you happy?” he asked and Root looked away from him, towards Shaw, and a smile appeared on her lips as she looked at her wife. Lazily spread across the couch looking right back at Root, with those dark focused eyes, looking at her like she was the only thing that mattered.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> tbh I really had no idea where this was going.... but in a solid 30 minutes this had happened :P
> 
> Root still has a lot of things she needs to work through and address, and Shaw will be there through everything, but that extra little nudge might just be what she needs.
> 
> Let me know your thoughts :) x


	49. Happy Place

Shaw was asleep when Root got in. For some reason she had expected Shaw to be awake, waiting, and as Root walked through the empty downstairs she wondered if maybe Shaw was out. But as she went into their room and saw Shaw splayed out, asleep on the bed she realised that maybe she _had_ been trying to stay awake, but she had fallen asleep accidentally. Bear was asleep on the end of the bed, he lifted his head to look at Root then quickly went back to sleep.

Root stood at the end of the bed and watched Shaw for a moment, she almost looked completely lifeless, aside from the rising and falling of her chest as she breathed, and the tiny twitch of her fingers that were resting against the pillow. She was face down on the bed, her dark hair sprawled across the pillow beside her. She hadn’t even made it under the covers yet. Laying there in a sweatshirt and boxers Root couldn’t help but smile.

Shaw had left Root with Garret in the safe house after quickly establishing there was no threat, she had clearly determined that giving the two of them some space couldn’t do any harm, particularly Root.

Root had told her to stay, but she hadn’t. By the looks of it, she’d only gone to the gym and then come back here. No new numbers, no shooting, and there didn’t appear to be a single new scratch on her body.

Root pulled her clothes off piece by piece, still facing the bed, still looking at Shaw who hadn’t batted an eyelid.

Root hadn’t known quite how to feel when she had walked in the door moments ago, her head had been swirling with the conversation she had with Garret, who had suddenly remerged from her past. Bringing up things she had purposefully forgotten, asking her questions that she thought she would never have to answer, about why she left, about her whole other life that seemed like more than just one lifetime ago.

She thought it would confuse her more than anything, make her sad, having to relive that time of her life where she was so young and alone. But for some reason, a strange clarity was now hanging over her head and heart. As she considered where she was now, and then she had walked into the bedroom, and seen her wife, perfect as ever, asleep on their bed. In their home. With their dog. She was exactly where she wanted to be. By no means did this fix anything that had happened, but it reminded her at least of what she had now, and how much _that_ meant to her.

Root walked around to Shaw’s side of the bed and tried to pull the covers out from underneath her, Shaw just grumbled lightly but didn’t move.

“Sam” she said softly “you’re gonna get cold.”

Shaw made a soft sleepy sound but still didn’t budge, and Root let out a light sigh as she climbed onto the bed beside Shaw.

“You don’t need to wake up, okay” Root said pulling Shaw up a little.

“What’re you doing” Shaw mumbled her eyes fluttering a little as she felt Root pull her off the pillow so she was sitting up.

“Laying on top of the blankets doesn’t have quite the same effect as being underneath them” Root said kicking the blankets back, Bear not bothering to move. Root gently lay Shaw back down and then pulled the covers back up over them both. Shaw was asleep again within seconds, Root turned onto her side to look at Shaw.

“Stop” Shaw mumbled suddenly and her hand moved out to cover Root’s face. Root smirked beneath her hand wondering if Shaw knew she was looking at her.

“Stop what sweetie?” Root asked and Shaw just grumbled something before rolling over onto her back, throwing her other arm out to the side.

Root smiled a little letting her eyes slowly shut as she considered where she was now, her happy place.

*

When Root woke up the next morning Shaw was still asleep. She lay there for a moment and let her eyes adjust to the light, listening to the quiet silence that filled their home, before she turned over and looked at Shaw. Root briefly wondered if Shaw had taken some kind of high powered sleeping tablet because it was unusual for her to sleep so much. She lightly poked Shaw in the leg with her toe. Shaw didn’t stir. She moved closer to Shaw so that their bodies were touching and then lightly bit her earlobe. Shaw mumbled a little and Root quickly dodged an arm that was flung out from under the covers.

“What?” Shaw grumbled her eyes still shut. Root lifted an eyebrow.

“Good morning” she said softly and Shaw let out a sigh opening her eyes a little and looking at Root.

“No.” Shaw said and Root smirked.

“It’s after nine, Sam” Root said and Shaw just shut her eyes again.

“You’re annoying.” Shaw said and Root arched an eyebrow.

“And you’re grouchy” Root said “Do you want me to make you coffee?”

Shaw opened her eyes again and stared at the ceiling. “No.”

Root looked at Shaw, noticing that she was being a little sharp.

“You okay?” Root asked and Shaw continued to stare upwards, blinking slowly as she began to wake up more.

“You did something uncharacteristically shitty” Shaw said and Root arched an eyebrow with a ounce of concern creeping into her veins.

“When?” Root asked “What did I do?”

“You cheated on me,” Shaw said turning to look at Root “With Garret.”

“What?” Root almost choked on the word as it spluttered from her mouth in shock. “Sameen, what are you talking about?”

“I can’t believe you.” Shaw said with a frown, looking back up at the ceiling, reaching up towards it then letting her hands fall back down onto her forehead.

“Sam” Root almost shouted, sitting up and staring at her Shaw. “I didn’t _cheat_ on you…”

“Oh you did.” Shaw said looking at Root who was staring at her in bewilderment with a grief stricken concern forming on her face.

Root opened her mouth to speak but too many words rushed to the edge of her tongue and she couldn’t even form a coherent sentence, with the thousands of thoughts racing around her mind. She closed her mouth again and Shaw sighed loudly.

“I’m so mad.” Shaw said and Root just frowned deeply.

“Why the fuck would I cheat on _you_ with _Garret_?” Root asked shaking her head in confusion “Sam, I don’t understand where this is coming from…it’s not even true.”

“How would you know?” Shaw asked raising an eyebrow “it was my dream.”

Root stared at her blankly.

“What?”

“I said, it was my dream.” Shaw said and yawned.

Root stared at her without saying anything, then finally Shaw realised why she seemed so agitated and arched an eyebrow.

“Wait did you think I meant…”

“Yesterday” Root finished and Shaw just stared at her.

“Oh my god” Shaw said and Root glared at her.

“I wouldn’t cheat on you,” Root said through gritted teeth. “Ever.”

“Well you did” Shaw said “In my dream,” she paused. “I can’t believe you thought I meant for real, although I’m still angry.”

“But it was a dream” Root protested.

“It still happened.” Shaw said staring at Root.

Root blinked as she looked at Shaw, wondering what the hell she was meant to do now that Shaw was angry about something that didn’t even happen. She also wondered _why_ Shaw had even had a dream that Root had cheated on her, was it her subconscious trying to tell her something… did she maybe have a trust issue, or was it just one of those stupid brain things.

“I’m sorry” Root said with a frown and Shaw just looked at her.

“Asshole.” she said and Root sighed.

“Sam…” she said with a pout her voice whiny. Shaw just stared at her.

“You slept with that nerd sack… instead of me.” Shaw shook her head, running her hands over her face and rubbing her eyes. “I can’t… why would you even go there.”

“I didn’t” Root said with a frown.

“Ugh” Shaw said “I’m so grossed out, and _mad.”_

“Do you want to talk about it?” Root asked and Shaw just looked at her.

“You cheated on me, with Vader boy, and then thought you could get away with not telling me.” Shaw frowned. “Doesn’t that break up some people’s marriages?”

“Sam,” Root groaned “It didn’t even happen though!”

Shaw just sighed and pulled herself out of bed and heading for the door. “I thought I was doing an okay job at this wife shit,” Shaw said as she started to disappear from sight, going down the stairs. Root quickly clambered off the bed, grabbing the nearest shirt and throwing it over her naked body and following after Shaw.

“But it turns out, if you put the right nerd in the picture, that gets overruled.”

“Will you shut up?” Root asked following Shaw into the kitchen. “I have literally done nothing wrong.”

“Oh, you’ve done plenty” Shaw said starting to make coffee.

“Are you seriously mad at me about this?” Root asked and Shaw spun around.

“The fact that you would do that to me _ever_ , dreams included, makes me very angry.” Shaw said and Root just let out a frustrated sigh, pushing Shaw out of the way so that she could make them coffee, figuring it was now the least she could do.

“Sam, I would never fucking cheat on you okay” Root said again “Like ever, ever ever.”

“But you did, Root.” Shaw said and sat down at the counter.

“It was a dream, Sameen” Root said loudly “it doesn’t fucking count.”

“It counts enough.” Shaw said and Root stared at her with her jaw locked.

“So you’re gonna tell people I cheated on you?” Root said, realising quickly that this was possibly her worst nightmare. Having the love of her life beyond angry for doing something that didn’t even fucking happen in real life, and clearly not being able to do a damn thing about it.

“Why would I tell people?” Shaw said and Root let out a low growl as she poured their coffee, sliding Shaw’s mug across the counter to her.

“You understand the concept that I didn’t actually touch another person right?” Root said and Shaw sipped her coffee.

“Doesn’t matter if you did or not, the image is burned into my mind.” Shaw said.

Root frowned and Shaw looked at her.

“You’re being a dick” Root said shaking her head and looking away from Shaw.

“Better than having one inside me when I’m already married.” Shaw shot back and Root immediately turned back to her with a death glare. “I didn’t even know you were into that, no matter how many nerd references he can make.”

“Sameen.” Root growled. “Stop. It.”

Shaw took another sip of coffee and stared at the counter top with a frown creasing her forehead. Root looked at her and let out a sigh, putting down her mug and walking around to the other side of the counter where Shaw was, turning Shaw’s seat bar stool around so they were facing each other.

“Can you just…” Root struggled to find any of the right words as she searched Shaw’s eyes. “Not make me feel terrible about something I did in your dream.”

“It felt real.” Shaw said staring into Root’s eyes.

“But it wasn’t” Root said softly putting her hands on Shaw’s legs. “I would never…” a small smile crept onto her face in amusement “I would never even _dream_ of cheating on you.”

“Lucky you.” Shaw said expressionlessly, and Root just looked at her without saying anything.

“You know I love you,” Root said after a beat of silence. “I would never even consider anyone else, especially Garret, he’s so…” her voice trailed off and she looked at Shaw. “You’re so sexy, and strong…why would I ever even look at someone else?”

“Sexy and strong?” Shaw repeated “Those are my two selling points?”

Root just frowned, feeling her heart aching in her chest and a heavy feeling in her body that unsettled her immensely.

“You’re making me feel horrible.” Root said quietly.

“Well imagine my shock” Shaw said “when I’m suddenly struck with an abnormal amount of deeply troubling emotions…in my _sleep_.”

Root stared at her. “You…felt it?”

“Yeah, I sure fucking did.” Shaw said.

“Sam” Root said her voice nothing more than a whisper as she took Shaw’s face in her hands and looked at her. “You know I’m here, forever. You’re my… happy place.” Root said and the troubled angry look in Shaw’s eye softened for a moment.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> inspired by a random post I saw "I pissed off my wife in a dream she had last night, now I have to go buy her flowers and apologise for dream me's actions.... marriage is fun"
> 
> this is only half the chapter... literally too exhausted to keep writing....so there will be more of this continued ;) don't worry... maybe Shaw got a little jealous
> 
> heads up there might not be a new chapter tomorrow night...working at Fashion Week and the days are looooooooooong xxx
> 
> thank you for reading, i adore you all x


	50. Don't Break My Heart

When Shaw got out of the shower Root was sitting on the lid of the toilet waiting for her. Shaw rolled her eyes and snatched her towel from Root’s hands wrapping it around her dripping body and completely ignoring Root. Ignoring the look on Root’s face, ignoring the fact that she still had nothing more than a thin layer covering her body, that damn see through white t-shirt. Shaw dried herself, ignoring Root’s wandering eyes. Shaw ignored the dream that still rolled around her mind, haunting her, every image clear like she was seeing it on a screen. Root and _him_.

What kind of fucked up dream, she thought to herself getting frustrated that it was getting to her so much, and getting immediately angry that she couldn’t let it go either. Dreams meant nothing, it was just bullshit your mind spun out while you were sleeping, they didn’t mean anything. But for some reason she couldn’t shake this.

“You can’t just pretend I’m not here, Sam” Root said finally and Shaw didn’t look up.

‘Watch me” Shaw said and Root just sighed.

“You’re being…ridiculous” Root said then paused, realising the weight of the words coming out of her mouth. Sameen Shaw being ridiculous meant a lot more than it would for anyone else. Shaw was a lot of things, but the fact that she was acting this way only resulted in one thing… she cared. A lot. And it was getting to her, the dream, the fact she cared, the _idea_ alone that Root cheated on her.

“You’re gonna have to try harder than that” Shaw said throwing Root a somewhat dirty look as she walked out of the bathroom and into their bedroom, where she dropped the towel and started yanking open drawers.

Root trailed behind her into the bedroom, her arms folded loosely across her chest as she watched Shaw.

“What do you want then?” Root asked leaving a well timed gap of silence. “You know I will damn well do anything, so what is it?” Root asked her eyes fixed on the back of Shaw’s head. “Want me to eat you out? Do you want a new gun? or whiskey? Do you want me to sit naked on my motorbike?” Shaw turned around and looked at Root, an eyebrow raised. Root stopped and stared at her.

“You know what I want?” Shaw said pulling a top on and looking at Root.

“What?”

“I want an explanation.” Shaw said simply. Root sighed.

“Sameen” she said softly. “There’s not one.”

Shaw just stared at her. That wasn’t good enough, Root knew it.

“You had a bad dream, like a really shitty one” Root said moving closer to her, slowly, knowing they were both very aware of the closing proximity. “But dreams don’t mean anything, that wasn’t a premonition, it wasn’t anything that will ever happen.”

Shaw just looked at her, that dark cloudy look in her eyes that Root could hardly stand, especially when she knew it was directed at her.

Root reached out for Shaw, her fingers grazing Shaw’s arm but she pulled away.

“Don’t” Shaw said and Root just looked down quickly letting her hand drop back to her side.

“You know I once had a dream that I couldn’t leave my house because my best friend had turned into a tiger and wanted to kill me” Root said and Shaw just stared at her. “Weirdly enough, that never happened.”

“I didn’t know you had a best friend.” Shaw said. Root almost laughed.

“Yeah, well in that dream I did” Root said “Which is exactly my point Sam, it wasn’t real.”

“Did you feel scared in that dream?” Shaw asked and Root couldn’t lie. She sighed lightly.

“Yes.”

“And when you woke up, you had to go check and make sure there wasn’t a tiger outside” Shaw paused “because you were still scared?”

Root looked at Shaw, her eyes soft, gentle. She swallowed and glanced at the floor between them before looking back at Shaw.

“Yeah, I did” she answered and Shaw just gestured to prove her point.

“I grasp the concept you didn’t actually sit on his dick, _Root_ ” Shaw said and there was something about the tone in which she said Root’s name that sent an immediate shiver down Root’s spine. Her stomach felt like it was sinking. “But the feeling it induced is still lingering, do you get that?”

Root just looked at her. She was clearly mad. In fact, it was a lot more than just anger that was boiling inside her. It was the idea of Root cheating on her, the fact she was having to deal with remnants of that feeling when she thought she would never have to.

“I get it” Root said quietly. “You’re checking for the tiger.”

“Exactly.” Shaw said and Root looked away. Shaw watched her for a moment, she watched Root’s eyes flick around the room, before staring down at her own hands. Then Shaw looked away. But suddenly Root was in front of her.

“That shouldn’t have to mean I stop being your wife while you get over something I didn’t even do” Root said her voice still low as her hand moved up to the side of Shaw’s face. Making contact, her fingers lightly brushing against Shaw’s jaw.

Shaw glared at her.

“I said _don’t_ ” Shaw said but Root refused to move away.

“Is here better?” Root asked moving her hand down to Shaw’s shoulder. Shaw turned her head slowly and stared at Root’s long fingers that were lightly rested on her shoulder, before looking back at Root with her jaw clenched.

“No.” she practically growled and Root just sighed.

“Well you’re running out of options” Root just said with a light shrug as she let her hand fall down to Shaw’s waist. She could feel how tense Shaw was all the way through her body. Stiff. Closing off.

“You don’t need to be touching me” Shaw said. “At all.”

“Oh yeah?” Root said and took a step forward pushing Shaw back against the dresser, their bodies crashing against each other as Root’s hand moved between Shaw’s legs, grazing against the underwear she had just pulled on.

“Get off me” Shaw growled trying to push Root off, but she had her full body weight pressing against Shaw, forcing her against the dresser.

“Why should I?” Root asked staring at her, directly into the eyes. “I haven’t done _anything_ wrong.”

Shaw stared at her. She said nothing. They just looked at each other. Root was almost taken back by the silence, Shaw not fighting back immediately. She saw Shaw’s jaw clench up, their eyes still locked on each other. Then suddenly, Shaw looked away, she looked down.

“Fuck” Shaw muttered, barely loud enough for Root to hear, it sounded like nothing more than a sharp breath. Root, slightly confused lifted herself off Shaw and moved her hand away, her eyes watching Shaw closely as a frown started to knit across her forehead.

Shaw shoved Root off her, away, and pushed past her suddenly without looking up.

“Sam?” Root said catching Shaw’s wrist as Shaw tried to leave the room, pulling her to a stop and looking at her with concern. Shaw kept her eyes down but could feel Root looking at her. She glanced up, briefly, for a split second and not any longer. But that was enough, and she knew it, for Root to see the tears that were rimming her eyes.

“Sameen…” Root’s voice was barely more than a breath.

Shaw twisted her wrist around Root’s grip, they both knew she could pull it free if she wanted to, but instead she just just it drop. Root’s fingers still wrapped around it.

Shaw looked to the side and blinked a couple of times, trying to get rid of the few stupid tears that were clinging to the rims of her eyes.

“If you say it, I will shoot you” Shaw said her voice was quiet and Root just bit the inside of her lip. She let her fingers slip away from Shaw’s wrist, sliding over her skin and then grabbing her hand before it could fall.

“I don’t need to say anything” Root said softly and Shaw just kept her head tilted away, staring down at the ground. Silence filled the space around them, then eventually Shaw used her free hand to quickly reach up and swipe a tear drop off her cheek.

“You’re overwhelmed” Root said watching as Shaw let her eyes rest shut for a moment, her jaw still tightly locked, her breathing rigid.

“I’ll get over it.” Shaw said and let go of Root’s hand, letting out a deep sigh and sitting on the edge of the bed. She glanced at Root for a moment before letting herself fall back with a thump, she stared up at the ceiling.

“Sameen,” Root said climbing on top of Shaw, knowing that her weight barely made a difference to her. “I love you.”

“I know that” Shaw said letting her hands come to rest on Root’s thighs, knowing damn well there was nothing but bare skin if she let her hands slide any further up.

“Remember when I had that nightmare that you died?” Root asked feeling Shaw’s warm palms pressed against her legs. Shaw just nodded. “Do you remember what happened?”

“It ended up looking something like this, you on top of me” Shaw said and Root just smiled.

“Will it help?” Root asked her fingers running lightly up and down Shaw’s arms. Shaw wanted to say yes, her lips parted ready for the word to come flying off her tongue but it didn’t. She couldn’t. She hesitated and Root saw it too. Shaw let out a sigh and rolled her head to the side looking away from Root again.

“Do you want to talk about it?” Root tried instead. “Sometimes dreams sound really dumb when you say them out loud.”

“I don’t want to tell you” Shaw said.

“That bad?” Root asked an eyebrow arched and Shaw glanced back at her. “Just tell me what I can do, are you still mad at me?”

“Mildly infuriated.” Shaw said.

“That’s an improvement” Root said with a small smirk and Shaw just glared at her.

“You know how women orgasm in their sleep?” Shaw said and Root tried not to smirk.

“Yeah?”

“And you wake up and it’s like…did that happen, or was it just a simulation my brain produced?” Shaw continued and Root just nodded. “I think my heart broke.” Shaw said and any trace of a smirk washed off Root’s face as it fell after those words.

“It was like…the volume was suddenly turned all the way up for the first time in my life, and the only sound was everything around me shattering.” Shaw said and Root stared at her, unable to look away, her eyes glazed over with tears.

“Sameen, I’m not going to break your heart” Root said readjusting her position on top of Shaw, leaning down on her so their bodies were touching, and their faces were close. “I would never hurt you.” Root said then paused. “Well, only for a little pleasure.”

“Yeah” Shaw said but her voice got caught in her throat. Root watched her, she was blinking quite a few times, she swallowed hard.

“Sam,” Root said softly letting her fingers trace Shaw’s hairline gently. “Trust me.”

“I do trust you” Shaw said but her voice got stuck again, hitching on that last word and she quickly squeezed her eyes shut, a single tear escaping and sliding down her cheek, dropping onto the bed.

“Look at me” Root said wiping her thumb across where the tear had fallen. Shaw’s eyes opened and Root was suddenly looking into two dark slightly watery eyes.

“You hold my heart in your hands, and I feel safe” Root said “And it should be the same for you.”

“It is.” Shaw said letting her arms wrap around Root’s back pressing their bodies tightly against one another. “You’re my safe place.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> dudes...i am so sorry, i was totally m.i.a so much longer than I thought, fashion week was so mental i was out at least 14 hours a day and I'd come home e x h a u s t e d.   
> anyway, if you're still here....thank you for bearing with me! i saw all your comments as you waited for another chapter <3 if you're lucky you might even get a couple tomorrow...just to make up for it ;)
> 
> let me know what you think of this one x  
> i'm still taking any suggestions too!


	51. Trouble

“Where’s John?” Shaw said bursting into Finch’s causing him to jump in fright at the sudden sound of her voice. Finch turned around immediately and saw Shaw and Root walking down the hallway towards him.

“He…took the afternoon off” Finch said a frown flickering across his forehead.

“He what?” Shaw repeated and Finch turned back to his computer.

“He does have a life outside of this, Sameen” Finch said and Shaw just raised an eyebrow and looked at Root.

“That seems hard to believe” Shaw said folding her arms and Root just smirked.

“He’s probably screwing Zoe” Root said nonchalantly and Shaw turned to her with a frown.

“Will you stop?”

Root raised an eyebrow.

“Just stop mentioning…” Shaw’s voice trailed off, she didn’t know exactly what it was that she was getting at. She rolled her eyes and sighed. “Just stop.”

“Make me.” Root said and Shaw stepped closer to her, their eyes locked on each other. Finch cleared his throat and Shaw looked away, the moment fractured.

“Everything okay?” he asked and Root’s eyes kept following Shaw.

“Sam had a bad dream” Root said “It’s been a…tricky morning.”

Finch glanced at Shaw who had a stony look on her face, her arms tightly folded across her chest defensively.

“Well I’m afraid it’s going to be a somewhat tricky afternoon too” he said and Root walked over to him, leaning over his shoulder to look at what was on his screen.

“New number?” Root said with a slight frown.

“Yes” Finch said “And I’m afraid one of you will have to go undercover for this one”

“No” Shaw said and both Finch and Root turned to look at her.

“Okay” Root said with a slight frown “Looks like I’ve been nominated.”

“Get John to do it” Shaw said and Finch just frowned.

“I’m afraid that’s not possible” Finch said and Shaw just stared at him.

“Why not?”

“Well, your cover is…well she’s an escort” Finch said and Root just grinned in amusement, while Shaw’s jaw fell open and she looked over at Root.

“This is just not my day” Shaw said and threw herself down onto the nearest chair. Root walked over to her, crouching down with her hands on Shaw’s knees.

“If he tries to touch me I’ll break his hand” Root said quietly and Shaw just glared at her.

“I hate you” Shaw said and Root just sighed.

“You don’t.”

Shaw stared at her, teeth gritted together.

“Stop me then” Root said softly. “Tell me you want me here and I won’t go.”

Shaw looked at her, absolutely ready to force her to stay here. It was almost unbearable the thought of Root being an escort tonight for some disgusting guy that would without a doubt eventually try something on her.

“You should go” Shaw said to her and Root almost looked disappointed.

“Are you sure?” Root asked and Shaw just nodded.

“Go.” Shaw said pushing Root’s hands off her. Root lingered for a moment, wondering whether this mood Shaw was in was because of her, or whether it was just that fucking dream. Still haunting her. Root hoped it was the latter, and got to her feet glancing at Shaw. Shaw looked at her. Root couldn’t help it, she bent down and placed a soft kiss on Shaw’s lips. She pulled back, and waited for a second their lips still just touching, to see what Shaw would do. A split second later Shaw kissed her quickly, just once then pushed Root by the shoulders to get her to go.

Root smiled to herself as she turned back to Finch.

“Is she…” Finch started, his voice quiet as Root got closer to him.

“She’s fine, Harry” Root said swiping up her new identity off the table and glancing back at Shaw. “I’ll see you later.”

Shaw watched Root leave. It annoyed her how much she hated watching Root leave the room. It’s not like she wanted to be around Root constantly, but it’s not that she particularly liked the distance either these days. She was just used to it, having Root there.

Shaw sighed and Finch turned towards her.

“It warms my heart you know” he said and Shaw just stared at him.

“What does?” she said monotonously.

“The two of you” Finch said.“It’s remarkable, to say the least”

“That we haven’t killed each other?” Shaw asked and Finch smiled.

“She never wanted to kill you, Sameen” Finch said and Shaw rolled her eyes. “And there was only ever one moment when you wanted her dead, but you didn’t even know her yet.”

“Your point, Harold?” Shaw asked.

“I was going to say, that it’s remarkable that in this vicious and hard world we so often find ourselves caught up in, you two have found a peace within each other.”

Shaw stared at him.

“Who would’ve known, right” Shaw said eventually and Finch smiled.

“I’m glad you found each other.” Finch said and Shaw looked down at her hands.

“Yeah, she’s…” Shaw paused and shook her head a little. “She’s the heart I never thought I had.”

Finch stared at her, shocked by her words, her softness. He hadn’t seen this side of her, like Root had. He wasn’t used to the fact that she wasn’t built entirely off sarcasm and coldness. As Shaw looked up at him, Finch quickly looked away but not fast enough for Shaw not to see the look on his face.

“You know,” Finch said shuffling some paper on his desk. “I wish you’d had a ceremony.”

Shaw rolled her eyes.

“Don’t tell her that.”

“You know there’s no reason why you still couldn’t…” Finch said and Shaw just folded her arms.

“No way.”

“Have you ever talked about it?” Finch asked and Shaw just stared at him.

“We haven’t, and for good reason…” Shaw stopped. “She’d probably want to come riding in on a horse or something.” Shaw shook her head, almost smiling. “It’s not gonna happen.”

*

Shaw decided later that night that another gun pointed at their numbers head wouldn’t be a bad thing. Especially since he seemed more like the perpetrator than anything. That paired with the fact that Root was now spending the evening with this guy, was more than enough for Shaw to want to point her 37 mil at his head.

She was perfectly positioned on a rooftop, with a clear shot into the hugely expensive hotel restaurant they were in. Shaw looked through the scope while she ate a burger, she almost hadn’t recognised Root when she had sat down. She was wearing a dark red dress that hugged her hips, the colour of her lips matched. She was in tall black heels and had a black coat draped over her arm. Her hair was falling perfectly over her shoulders, and she had smiled as she had sat down in front of him. Shaw had looked closely, seeing the smile just fall short of reaching her eyes. Either way, she was still charming him.

He laughed, he smiled, he reached across the table and touched her hand, Shaw felt her chest tighten, her finger itched to pull the trigger. She watched as he moved closer to Root so that he could whisper something in her ear, his fingers picking up a strand of her hair and grazing across her chest as he did so.

Shaw’s jaw tightened. She watched Root. Root turned into him, they were talking closely. Shaw could feel the frown forming on her forehead. She was just doing her job, Shaw reminded herself. She could tell Root was uncomfortable, despite appearing like everything was fine, it was just the little things Shaw noticed. The rigid movements, the fact she kept looking to the side, the small gap of distance she kept at all times between them.

Shaw saw him move his hand toward her leg and immediately swivelled the gun so that it was focused on something else, leaning back and taking a breath.

Maybe this had been a fucking terrible idea, she thought and leaned back in looking through the scope. It was still focused on the restaurant but on the far side. And as her eye focused she realised who she was looking at. John and Zoe.

An amused smirk spread across her face as she watched them staring at each other, Zoe was touching his hand across the table. He was smiling.

“Oh John,” Shaw mumbled with an entertained grin. She watched, realising how normal they looked, how unnoticed they were together. And she wondered if it was like that with Root. If it just made sense to anyone who looked. Moving the gun back towards where Root had been sitting, she frowned. The table they had been at was empty.

“Did you really think I wouldn’t know you’re up here?” Root’s voice said from behind her and Shaw spun around. Root was standing on the other side of the roof, her coat draped over her shoulders, a playful smirk on her face.

“What’d you do with him?” Shaw asked and looked back towards the hotel.

“Nothing good” Root said and Shaw just smiled a little.

“Come here” Shaw said and Root sauntered over to her, she smelt like floral perfume. Shaw leaned against the ledge that her gun was propped up on, and Root came straight over to her taking Shaw’s face in her hands and kissing her, their bodies pressing together.

“Mm, wait” Shaw mumbled against Root’s lips, taking her by the waist and forcing her back. “I wanted to show you something.”

Root lifted an eyebrow and looked at Shaw, seeing a lipstick smudge across Shaw’s mouth and wiping it away with her thumb quickly.

“Look through the scope” Shaw said and nodded towards the gun, Root lifted an eyebrow and then leaned down looking through the sight, a smile stretching across her face and a small laugh escaping her lips.

“They’re not allowed to out couple us” Root said when she finally looked away and Shaw lifted an eyebrow.

“We’re married, I’m pretty sure we win.” Shaw said. Root looked at her for a moment without saying anything, before she moved closer.

“Are you still upset?” Root asked.

“Kind of” Shaw said “but you also look too hot for me to be angry.” she said grabbing Root by the waist and pulling her closer again.

“I had at least 80% less clothes on this morning and you were still mad” Root said nudging her nose against Shaw’s.

“That’s because you cheated on me” Shaw said with a small smirk.

“Stop it” Root said with a frown “You know I didn’t, can you just admit that, please.”

Shaw looked at her and rolled her eyes.

“Okay you’re not a cheater, but the image of you sitting on that lumpy nerd is still very much in my mind” Shaw said and Root practically cringed.

“At least I’m still a top” she mumbled and Shaw lifted an eyebrow.

“Not anymore.” Shaw said and Root looked at her. “You’ve lost all your privileges of being in control.”

“Is that why you wouldn’t let me touch you this morning?” Root asked and Shaw looked at her.

“No, I was angry and grossed out.”

“And now?”

“I’m going to drive you to the edge and then go drink a beer” Shaw said and Root just stared at her, clearly turned on.

*

Root stepped off the curb and hailed a taxi, a yellow cab swung to the side immediately and Root scooted in, followed by Shaw. She gave the driver their address and then leaned her head back against the seat. Shaw was staring at her.

She turned her head a little so she was looking back at Shaw.

“What?” she said her voice quiet.

There was something about the look in Shaw’s eye that made her realise she was about to get into trouble.

“Figure it out,” Shaw said their eyes still locked for another moment before Shaw’s wandered down over Root’s body.

“Here?” Root asked quietly lifting an eyebrow and Shaw just smirked.

“What are you shy, suddenly?”

Root rolled her eyes and glanced at the driver in the rearview mirror, he had a headphone in one ear and was nodding his head to whatever music was playing, completely oblivious. Root looked back at Shaw before hitching her dress up so it sat near the top of her thighs.

“Are you gonna help?” Root asked and Shaw just looked at her.

“Touch yourself.” Shaw said.

“Is this going to make you less angry?” Root asked as she let her hand slip between her legs, her finger hooking into the side of her underwear.

“We’ll see.” Shaw said and Root let her head rest back against the seat as she started working her fingers against herself.

“Are you power tripping because you know I feel bad?” Root asked turning her head to look at Shaw.

“No” Shaw said.

“Then what is this?” Root asked starting to sound a little breathless, her cheeks flushing pink, her nipples visible through the fabric of the dress. Shaw smirked. Root slipped further down the seat, tipping her legs further apart.

Shaw ignored the question. “What are you thinking about?” she asked noticing the change in Root’s breathing.

“You.” Root said almost instantly, and slipped a finger inside herself. Her back arched a little way off the seat, and she bit down hard on her bottom lip.

“Do I make you hot?” Shaw asked her voice low as her dark eyes stared at Root through the dim lighting of the cab.

“Yeah” Root said her voice practically a whisper. Pulling her hand out from between her legs and reaching for Shaw’s arm, grabbing it Shaw could feel Root’s wet fingers wrap around her wrist and force her arm between Root’s leg. Root pressed Shaw’s hand between her legs so she could feel the soaking wet patch on her underwear. She jolted a little in pleasure as Shaw pressed her fingers into the wet patch, feeling as though if Shaw touched her anymore she would come undone right there and then.

“You’re so easy” Shaw said with a smirk pulling her hand back and Root just stared at her.

“I find it kinda hot when you’re mad” Root said and Shaw just stared at her.

“I have a lot of things to be mad about” Shaw said “You dream cheated on me, my brain simulated a feeling that I’m not even meant to have, and you got touched by some old creepy guy at dinner, _and_ I had to have an actual conversation with Harold today.”

“What did you talk about?” Root asked and Shaw rolled her eyes.

“Shut up and finger yourself” Shaw said and Root let her fingers wander back into her panties, moments later the tiniest gasp escaped her mouth before she quickly bit down on her lip.

“H-how is this helping you?” Root asked and Shaw just stared at her, before pulling Root closer to her.

“Because,” Shaw said with a small smile. “You haven’t looked away from me once, I know you’re thinking about me.”

“And I told you” Root said. “Is that reassuring enough?”

Shaw just rolled her eyes wrenching Root’s hand away from between her legs and replacing it with her own. Her fingers snaked down the front of her underwear and Shaw looked at her.

“Spread ‘em” she said and Root’s legs immediately fell apart, her eyes locked on Shaw’s.

“When did you get so obedient?” Shaw asked and Root smiled a little.

“I know I’m in trouble” Root said quietly, the taxi driver still completely unaware of what was happening behind him.

Shaw slipped a finger inside Root and immediately her body reacted. Root’s lips parted and Shaw just watched her, their faces inches from each other.

“You know what finger this is?” Shaw asked and Root just stared at her. “It’s my middle finger”

Root smirked. “Ironic.”

“Fuck you.”

“You are.”

Then Shaw’s mouth was on Root’s, she kept just one finger inside Root and worked her thumb against her clit letting her mouth catch Root’s moans.

Root’s fingers were digging into Shaw’s leg, and the other hand was above her head wrapped around the headrest, using it as support as her back arched into Shaw’s hand. She could feel herself building and fast, everything inside her was tensing, soaring, ready to send her into the spiral before she storm…and then the calm.

She tried to keep looking at Shaw but her eyes were fluttering shut at the feeling, the pleasure that was rushing through her body making her toes curl.

Shaw stopped kissing her, but she didn’t care, she was right there just about to tip over the edge…and then she felt Shaw’s hand leave her underwear. The car rolled to a stop.

“Thanks man” Shaw said throwing the car door open and handing him some money as she got out of the car.

Root sat there dumbstruck, unable to move, unable to even think. She stared at Shaw who was standing on the sidewalk looking at her with the most wicked smirk plastered on her face.

“Come on, _sweetie_ ” Shaw said tucking her hands into her pockets as she waited.

Root stared at her, she opened her mouth to speak and then closed it again when no words came out. Then slowly she shuffled towards the open door, swinging her legs out one at a time and tugging her dress down. Shaw grinned seeing Root struggle, stepping forward and grabbing her arm pulling her onto the curb before shutting the door, the taxi driving off. She let go of Root’s arm.

“You can’t…” Root said standing there watching as Shaw hopped up the steps towards their front door.

“I did.” Shaw said opening the door and turning around to look at Root. Root glared at her, the sensation between her legs still yet to fade, she took a step forward and then growled slightly.

“Are you gonna have an orgasm on our porch?” Shaw asked from the door and Root pulled her jacket off her shoulders, before sucking in a deep breath and slowly storming up the stairs. She stopped in front of Shaw before she went inside, pushing her against the doorway and sticking her tongue straight into Shaw’s mouth letting it fight against hers, deeply, roughly, before she pulled back and walked straight inside without a word.

Shaw just smirked, shutting the door behind them going into the kitchen and grabbing a beer before following Root upstairs and finding her leaning with an arm against the doorway to their bedroom.

“You mad?” Shaw asked cheekily and Root turned to look at her.

“Mildly infuriated.” Root replied and Shaw smirked.

“At least I didn’t cheat on you.” Shaw said and took a sip from her beer.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was meant to be two chapters but it turned into one huge one....so you're welcome ;) enjoy it, and as always let me know your thoughts + feels.  
> It ended up going in like several different directions.... but hey, I would follow these two pretty much anywhere.
> 
> thank you for sticking around, loveeeee xx


	52. Good Morning

“Donuts” Root’s voice echoed through the house, followed by the sound of the front door closing that jolted Shaw awake. She sat up just in time for Root to walk through the door with a tray of donuts and coffee.

“What’s this?” Shaw asked taking the coffees from Root as she pulled off her clothes until she was in nothing but bra and underwear and climbed back onto the bed.

“I’m in a good mood” Root said with a smile and leaned in to kiss Shaw on the mouth, before taking one of the takeout coffee cups from Shaw’s hands. Shaw raised an eyebrow.

“And I also still feel bad about dream cheating on you” Root added and Shaw smirked.

“Oh” she said taking a sip of coffee. “Well this helps.”

Root rolled her eyes with a smile reaching into the box for a donut and taking a large bite from one.

“Every time you take your clothes off helps” Shaw continued with a smirk and Root just stared at her, with pink icing on the end of her nose.

“Or that” Shaw couldn’t help but smile at the sight of Root in front of her, coffee in one hand, pink sprinkles donut in the other, wearing sexy black lingerie …with icing on her nose.

“Why are you smiling at me like that?” Root asked staring at Shaw as she took another bite from the donut.

“You’re pretty” Shaw said and flicked her finger up Root’s nose wiping the icing from it then licking it off her finger. Root was still just looking at her, soft brown eyes.

“So are you” Root said and Shaw just rolled her eyes.

“Accept the damn compliment, you pain in the ass” Shaw said and Root just smiled looking down.

“Fine” she said. Shaw ate a donut. Root chewed her lip in thought, her finger picking at the lid of the coffee cup.

“Just say it” Shaw said with a mouthful, seeing the contemplative look on Root’s face.

“I was just thinking,” Root said. “I’m proud of us.”

“You as well?” Shaw mumbled thinking about what Harold had said yesterday. “What have _we_ done now?”

“It’s been a shitty month” Root said “And…I haven’t exactly been easy to deal with.”

Shaw raised an eyebrow. “It wasn’t just you.”

“I know,” Root said. “But it would have been easy just to walk away from this, but we made it through the storm, and that makes me kind of happy.”

Shaw stared at her and licked the frosting off her own thumb. “I think you’re wrong.” Shaw said and Root looked at her surprised.

“It wouldn’t have been easier to walk away,” Shaw said “Overlooking that moment I did run off to the old apartment, it’s not easy to walk away from you, ever.”

“So even if I’d gotten worse…” Root asked.

“I would still be here.” Shaw said. “You can’t just bail on a marriage if things aren’t all sunshine and sex.”

Root smiled. “I never would have picked you to be the type that’s so…”

“Committed?” Shaw finished and Root nodded. “Yeah well, thank my parents for that one.”

“I would’ve liked to.” Root said softly and Shaw looked down.

“I do agree though,” Shaw said “We made it through a pretty nasty shitstorm, but I think you are the one we should be congratulating here.”

“Why?” Root asked. “I was practically intolerable, I’m shocked you didn’t shoot me.”

“But look at where you are now” Shaw pointed out. “You’re happy, aren’t you?”

“Right now, yes” Root said with a small smile.

“It’s the donuts, right?” Shaw said with a smirk and Root looked at her with a smile.

“It’s you.” she said. “and the donuts.”

Shaw smirked and then her phone started to ring. She let out a sigh and glanced at it before looking back at Root.

“I’m proud of you.” Shaw said and climbed out from underneath the covers, leaning forward and kissing Root on the end of the nose before grabbing her phone and getting out of bed.

“What?” she answered seeing Finch’s name on the screen.

“Sameen, The Machine just sent me a troubling message.” Finch said and Shaw frowned.

“What is it?”

“It’s your wife’s birthday.” Finch said and Shaw raised an eyebrow, not used to hearing other people referring to Root as her _wife_ it almost took her a second to realise what he had just said. Then finally when it clicked her eyes widened.

“What?” she said loudly. “Today?”

“Apparently so.” Finch said. “I’m going to take it by that reaction that you didn’t know either.”

“She never mentioned it” Shaw said.

“I can’t imagine it was ever a highlight of her year” Finch said and Shaw frowned.

“Yeah well that’s not the life she has now Harold.” Shaw said and stared back into their bedroom where she had wandered out of. Root was no longer sitting on the bed. Shaw could hear the shower running.

“We have to do something.” Shaw said. “Or, I have to do something.”

“Let me know if you need any assistance” Finch said and Shaw hung up the phone.

“Shit” she muttered running a hand through her hair, before wandering back into the bedroom where she finished off her coffee, dropped her phone on the bed and walked into the bathroom. Her mind was ticking over as she pulled her clothes off and dropped them on the floor. She didn’t know whether Root wanted her to know about her birthday or not, whether it was something she avoided, or whether she just didn’t want to make a big deal out of it. Either way, Shaw couldn’t just do nothing.

Opening the shower door Shaw slipped in to join Root, coming up behind her and slipping her arms around her shoulders, placing a kiss on her shoulder blade, then her neck.

“Hi” Root smiled and turned around in Shaw’s arms. Shaw looked at her as the hot water hit their bodies. “What’s that look for?” Root asked.

“Nothing.” Shaw said and kissed Root’s lips lightly. “I just thought you might want company.”

Root arched an eyebrow. “Who was on the phone?”

“Harold” Shaw said. “He wanted to let me know of his disapproval that I cleared out his tea cabinet for weapons.”

Root smirked. “That was probably a bad move.”

“What’s he gonna do? Shoot me?” Shaw smirked and Root rolled her eyes.

“Well he could now.”

“But you wouldn’t let him” Shaw smirked, Root laughed and pushed Shaw under the stream of water.

“No one touches my girl” Root said “Except me.”

“Seems kind of unfair since that gross guy had his hand up your dress last night” Shaw said flicking some soap at Root. “And don’t even start me on Garret.”

“If you mention his name one more time I’ll choke you.” Root said. “And not in the cute way.”

“When is it ever the cute way with you?” Shaw smirked and Root just moved forward, pinning her against the shower wall, the stream of water running down the back of her head and spine. She leaned her wet body against Shaw’s and looked at her, their faces close.

“That man might have touched me briefly, but he sure as hell payed for it” Root said and Shaw just stared at her, water running off her body.

“Did he?” Shaw smirked. “Sure you didn’t enjoy it?” she said jokingly but suddenly Root’s hand was around her throat. Shaw smiled and Root just stared at her with dark eyes.

“Don’t be disgusting.” Root said tightening her grip a little enough to feel Shaw’s heart beat pick up speed against the palm of her hand that was around her neck.

“Hey,” Shaw said feeling her throat start to hurt under Root’s grip, her voice sounding a little more strangled.

“I love you.” Shaw said softly her eyes watching Root's, and Root’s hand immediately loosened. She blinked a couple of times as the words sunk in. Her hand slipped from Shaw’s neck down to her shoulder, her thumb grazing across Shaw’s collarbone.

“Every time you say that it’s like hearing it for the first time” Root said.

“I don’t think I’ll ever be used to it either” Shaw said and stood up off the wall, pushing Root back into the middle of the shower. “I only tease you because I know you get flustered easily.”

“And you’re clearly still a little mad” Root said.

“Not today.” Shaw said with a smile, and as much as that tugged at Root’s curiosity that smile got to her first, and every other thought in her mind vanished. That damn fucking smile.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is just a short chapter, but the rest will follow soon don't worry ;)
> 
> What do you think Shaw will get up to for Root's birthday????? and how will Root react?!
> 
> Also, exciting news; the first chapter of Coffee & Handcuffs will be up shortly which is the little sister PREQUEL to this story... but don't worry, this one is my priority. I'm not abandoning anything. I think you'll like this new one too! Watch this space ;) I hope you'll read it!
> 
> Let me know your thoughts, thank you for the support! xxx


	53. She Knows

Shaw was having a hard time treating today like a normal day. But it seemed effortless to Root, which made Shaw wonder whether Root didn’t want her to know it was her birthday, or maybe she just didn’t care. But Shaw was on edge, she wanted Root to have a good day. Her mood this morning almost reminded Shaw of when they first started sleeping together, Root had this energy about her that was almost contagious… not that Shaw ever caught it. She would roll her eyes as Root grinned, her eyes sparkling.

But right now, today was seeming like any other day. They were working a number, following some guy around who Finch had deemed to be the perpetrator in this situation, although to Shaw he seemed like the most boring bad guy in the world. This was Root’s number, but Shaw had insisted on going with her.

_“You said we couldn’t do missions together” Root said with a confused smile as Shaw followed her out the door._

_“Whatever.” Shaw had said and felt Root’s eyes on her._

Shaw didn’t want to be obvious about the fact that she was trying, but she felt like Root would notice even if she did something subtle. Shaw watched a florist van pull up outside the hotel, then looked back at their number who was checking in at the front desk in the lobby.

Root was hovering near the bellhop a few meters away pretending to be engrossed in a pamphlet.

“Sameen,” Finch’s voice said into her ear. “Any developments on the _situation_?”

“Which situation, Harold?” Shaw asked looking between Root and their number.

“Well both,” Finch said. “Although I was mainly referring to your wife.”

Her wife. She still wasn’t used to hearing that. She felt it in her chest.

“No” Shaw said. “She’s acting like it’s any other day, and I don’t know whether she’s doing it for a reason.”

“I understand that you don’t want to unnecessarily blow things out of proportion, Sameen,” Finch said. “But I urge you to also consider, what Root would do if this situation were reversed.”

Shaw lifted an eyebrow. “Oh god.”

“Oh no…” Finch said, but Shaw was distracted, staring at Root trying to block the visuals of Root trying to throw her some kind of elaborate party on her birthday.

“Sameen” Finch said urgently. “Sameen we have a situation.”

“Harold, I know.” Shaw snapped, knowing she _had_ to do something for Root. Something that was fitting.

“No, Sameen, our number” Finch said “He’s the victim not the perpetrator” Finch practically yelled down the phone and Shaw immediately swivelled around to look at the number who had disappeared from the check in desk. Only to see Root about to take a swing at the florist. Shaw’s eyes widened and she ran across the lobby, as flowers went flying through the air out of their perfectly arranged bouquet as the florist was knocked to the ground by Root.

Root turned around to smirk at Shaw, rubbing her knuckles lightly.

“I’m getting better at that” Root said “thanks to you.”

Shaw was about to smile when the fake florist got back to his feet and went to lurch at Root.

 _Oh hell no_ were the only words running through Shaw’s head as she pushed Root out of the way and grabbed the guys arm, wrenching it backwards as she kneed him once in the stomach and once in the groin, before letting him drop to the ground groaning in agony.

Root stared at her with an open mouth. Shaw picked a couple of no trampled flowers off the ground before she turned around, gathering them together in a mini bouquet. When she turned back to Root she smirked and stuck her hand out with the flowers, practically shoving them into Root’s hands before she walked towards the doors.

Root looked down at the flowers and smiled, before looking at Shaw who was almost outside. It was a silly little thing, but it was enough for Root’s heart to flutter.

“Sam” Root called out and ran after her, catching up with her as they walked down the street. “I feel like you’re in a weird mood today.”

Shaw glanced at Root. “So are you.”

“Sameen” Root said and grabbed Shaw’s arm bringing her to a halt. “What is it?”

Shaw stared at her for a moment. She almost said happy birthday. But she stopped herself because what if to Root it wasn’t _happy_. Root stared at her expectantly. She looked so damn pretty holding flowers, with her soft eyes and leather jacket.

Shaw rolled her eyes, closing the small gap between them and catching Root’s lips with hers, kissing her, properly, firmly, letting it hold for a moment before she pulled back and kept walking.

“Who told you?” Root’s voice said from behind her and Shaw came to a stop, turning around slowly and looking at Root, who looked back at her with an eyebrow arched. She didn’t look annoyed, she didn’t look…anything.

“What?” Shaw said knowing very well that pretending ignorance wouldn’t last more than a few seconds.

“Was it Harold?” Root asked walking towards her and Shaw stared at her expressionlessly.

“She told Harold” Shaw said with a sigh. “And Harold told me.”

Root smirked a little. “Of course She did.”

“Why didn’t you tell me?” Shaw asked.

“It’s not a big deal” Root said with a shrug.

“Still” Shaw said and Root just watched her, there was no point in lying or hiding the truth. Shaw was her wife. At the end of the day she shouldn’t feel like she had to conceal things.

“I’ve never had a decent birthday” Root said with a shrug and looked away. “And so I treat it like any other day, because if I treat it like my birthday something will go wrong.”

“That’s not true.” Shaw said.

“It is.” Root said adamantly.

Shaw looked at her with a frown. “Fine,” she said. “But I can treat it like your birthday.”

“Sam” Root said and grabbed her hand. “Just be like we always are, that’s enough for me.”

“I’ve been doing that already” Shaw said with a smirk. “If you think I wouldn’t pick flowers off the floor for you on any other day, you’re wrong.”

Root rolled her eyes unable to hide the smile that was spreading on her face.

“Stop being so cute” Root said, Shaw just smiled.

*

Shaw burst into Finch’s while Root was running an errand.

“She knows” Shaw said loudly and Finch jumped at the sound of her voice.

“She knows it’s her birthday?” Finch raised an eyebrow and Shaw rolled her eyes.

“She knows we know” Shaw said. “What do we do?”

“Well for starters, you don’t need to be so…panicked” Finch said staring at her, and Shaw frowned at him.

“She thinks her birthdays are doomed, Harold” Shaw snapped “we have to do something.”

“I’ll tell John” Finch said and turned towards his phone but at that very second Reese walked through the door.

“Tell me what?” he asked looking between them.

“It’s Root’s birthday.” Shaw said. “Where the hell have you been?”

Reese raised an eyebrow at her and Shaw just shook her head. “Actually I don’t want to know.”

“You sure?” Reese smirked and Shaw pretended to gag.

“I have an idea” Finch said and looked at Shaw. “But you won’t like it.”

Shaw looked at Finch and then suddenly realised what he was thinking, and it was the very same singular idea that had been circling her head since Finch had called her this morning. “You’re right, I don’t like it” Shaw said. “But I also agree.”

“What are we agreeing on?” Reese said looking between them.

Finch and Shaw stared at each other as the idea processed in both their heads. Shaw could feel herself cringing inside even at the thought of it, but she could practically see Root’s reaction already if she pulled it off. It would make both the black diamond and proposal seem like such tiny acts in comparison.

Shaw let out a loud sigh.

“You should go” Finch said. “I have contacts.”

“Who are we contacting?” Reese asked still as confused as ever. Shaw looked at him finally.

“Get a different suit, and get Zoe.” she said before spinning on her heel and walking out, almost crashing straight into Root as she did. Shaw’s eyes widened and Root just arched an eyebrow.

“Yes?” Root asked and Shaw just grabbed her by the arm and towed her back out.

“We’re done for the day” Shaw said and Root frowned.

“But She just said…” Root started.

“No, I’m in charge, not Her” Shaw said and Root couldn’t help but smirk at that comment.

“Sameen,” Root said and Shaw stopped, turning around to face her.

“Look I know your other birthdays have sucked, and I know you think it’s going to fall apart if you actually acknowledge the fact it is your birthday.” Shaw said “but I don’t want to pretend it’s not, we were having a good day, remember?”

Root nodded. Their eyes on each other. Root couldn’t help but feel safe with Shaw, like everything she said was surrounded by a shield, that if everything did go wrong maybe it just wouldn’t matter at all, because Shaw was there. Shaw was always there. Her heart fluttered.

“I want you to be happy” Shaw said simply and Root smiled.

“I am” Root said softly and Shaw watched her closely.

“Okay” Shaw said with a small nod. “Let’s go then.”

“Where?” Root asked.

“Anywhere you want.”

“Anywhere?” Root asked with a smirk.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ahhhh sorry this isn't finished... i'm sleeeeeepy, but that just means more birthday Root tomorrow! 
> 
> Shaw is definitely up to something... but she's also letting Root decide what to do.... hmm ;)
> 
> Alsooo the first part of Coffee & Handcuffs is officially up - which is my prequel to this story, go check it out! Technically you got 2 chapters today if you count that one which I posted earlier hehe
> 
> Lemme know your thoughts x
> 
> PREQUEL --> http://archiveofourown.org/works/7925011


	54. I Love You

“ _This_ is your anywhere” Shaw was practically grinning as a plate of dumplings was pushed in front of them, at the little dumpling place Root had led her to in the depths of Chinatown.

Root picked up a pair of chopsticks and smiled down at the table.

“Yeah” she said quietly. “Do you mind?”

“Do I mind?” Shaw rolled her eyes. “It’s food, and it’s you, of course I don’t mind.”

Root looked up at her and smiled, but her eyes seemed distant. Shaw watched her eat for a moment.

“What are you thinking about?” she asked breaking the silence. Root stayed quiet for a moment and Shaw immediately thought something was wrong, but then Root looked up at her with a smile.

“Do you remember when you got mad at me for eating more than my half of the dumplings?” Root said and Shaw’s concerned expression immediately lightened into a smirk.

“I’m counting now, just so you know” Shaw grinned, her eyes still watching Root closely.

“Do you remember this place?” Root asked her voice was quiet, and reminiscent. Shaw suddenly looked around forcing her brain to think, had they been here before? It seemed familiar, but she couldn’t place it. She looked back at Root.

“We came here once,” Root said “After we first started sleeping together, you showed up at my place and you were quite drunk and I tried to make you go to bed but you were hungry, and thenyou got back up and said we should go for a walk.”

“We came here?” Shaw said with an inquisitive look on her face, only having the most distant recollection of this happening.

Root nodded. “You told me to lead the way, and I’ve always had a weird fondness of Chinatown, and so we were walking around and then you saw this place and demanded we get dumplings.”

Shaw smiled. “I was clearly _very_ drunk.”

“I know” Root said “You threw up on the sidewalk on the way home, and you didn’t remember anything when you woke up the next day.”

“You never told me that’s what we did” Shaw said their eyes locked on one another and Root chewed her lip.

“I didn’t want to” Root said with a shrug.

“Why?” Shaw asked sticking an entire dumpling in her mouth.

“Because” Root said “It was like, my little memory of you, I wanted to preserve it.”

“And?” Shaw asked knowing there was more to it than that.

“You may have told me you _like_ liked me” Root said “While you were shovelling dumplings into your drunk mouth”

Shaw lowered her chopsticks and swallowed her mouthful, looking at Root.

“I said I _like_ liked you?” Shaw shook her head “I would never have said those words.”

Root smirked. “You did, babe.”

Shaw glanced around the restaurant and smirked to herself, that was why Root had bought them here. Not just because it was the best dumplings Shaw had ever eaten, but she had nostalgia connected to this place.

“And you never told me?” Shaw said.

Root shook her head. “You would have freaked out.”

“True” Shaw said. “But I told you when you said I love you in your sleep.”

“That’s different” Root said.

“How?”

“We’re married.”

“At the time we didn’t know what we were” Shaw said and Root just smiled.

“I’m glad we’re still married” Root said.

“Me too” Shaw replied staring at Root. “And for the record, I still _like_ like you.”

Root almost blushed as she looked down at the table and poked a dumpling with one of her chopsticks. Shaw watched her with a smirk.

“You know what I love about you?” Shaw said and Root looked up almost shocked to hear those words leave Shaw’s mouth.

“What?” Root asked curiously.

“How you’re so assertive, literally all the time, and then I say something drenched in sap and you completely turn into a shy ten year old girl” Shaw said. “It’s completely contradicting”

Root just gazed at her across the table. The bright Chinatown lights, the small mostly empty restaurant. The wonky lanterns. She stared at Shaw.

“Maybe it’s because I’m still not used to you even saying things that aren’t constantly filled with sarcasm” Root said.

“What like I love you?” Shaw said and Root’s cheeks flushed red. Shaw smiled knowing that was exactly what was gonna happen.

“I kind of hate that you can do that” Root said quietly and Shaw looked at her with a smile.

“You should get used to it” Shaw said then paused. “But if we’re telling drunk stories that we’ve kept to ourselves…”

Root looked at her and narrowed her eyes. “I remember all of them.” Root said and Shaw just shook her head with a smile.

“The second time I stitched you up” Shaw reminded her “we had to use vodka to sterilise the bullet wound, and you drank like half the bottle by yourself”

Root rolled her eyes. “I kind of remember that.”

“Do you remember laying on the floor of my apartment throwing Skittles into your mouth and shouting ‘taste the rainbow’ every time you didn’t miss?” Shaw asked her and Root stared at her with wide eyes. “I couldn’t let you go home, you’d almost been shot in the stomach”

“Let you let me eat skittles?” Root raised an eyebrow in amusement.

“No that was you,” Shaw said. “You told me if I didn’t go and get you some you’d run a knife from my shoulder to my finger.”

“I said that?” Root said and Shaw just grinned.

“You’re a lot of fun when you’ve had too much vodka and not enough painkillers”

“I remember waking up,” Root said “And you had made yourself eggs and not me.”

“You lay on my bed and groaned in pain all day” Shaw smirked and then glanced at her phone seeing a message from Finch and then slipping it back in her pocket. “Come on,” she said to Root and started to slide out of her seat. “we’ve got to go.”

“Where?” Root asked as Shaw much to her surprise took her hand and led her outside.

“Somewhere” Shaw said.

*

Shaw led them to an abandoned subway station, near Chinatown using a vending machine as the entrance Root stared at her in confusion.

“Seriously where are we going?” Root asked as she followed Shaw down the stairs. “What is this place?”

“Finch’s backup plan” Shaw said with a smirk. Root followed Shaw carefully then suddenly came to a stop when she looked up. Hundreds of fairy lights were strung up, there were candles and music playing quietly and a giant white cake. Root’s mouth fell open as she she came to a complete stop. Finch, Lionel, Reese and Zoe all turned to look at her, but she looked straight at Shaw.

“What is this?” Root asked in shock.

“I’m never going to agree on having a ceremony the way you want, so I’m bringing you as close as you can get” Shaw said with a small smirk.

“This is our…” Root’s eyes were still wide as she looked at Shaw then looked at the others who all shared the same heart warmed smile. She looked back at Shaw who just nodded.

“Happy birthday” Shaw mouthed and Root’s hand came up to cover her mouth.

“Personally I’m glad you two are finally letting us in on this” Finch said and Shaw rolled her eyes.

“Although an open bar would have been nice” Fusco added and Shaw pointed at him.

“That is an idea I support.”

“For now I’d like to say a few words” Finch said and handed both Root and Shaw two glasses of champagne. “I know for both of you the idea of marriage, let alone a ceremony is fairly abstract concept, however it really is heartwarming to be able to see two of our dearest friends and colleagues creating a life together, after what was undeniably a disastrous start.”

Shaw stared at the ground. Root stared at Shaw.

“You’re two of the strongest and most intelligent women I know” Finch said “And whilst you are so very different from one another, you’re also perfect for each other.” Finch held up his glass, and everyone else followed.

Shaw turned to look at Root, clinking their glasses together. Shaw had a small smirk playing on her face and Root looked like she had just seen Santa, her whole face was lit up, her eyes twinkling with happiness, the smile unable to leave her lips.

“I’d like to say something” Reese said and Shaw turned to him and rolled her eyes in amusement.

“This’ll be good” Shaw muttered.

“Root,” Reese said “I’d never seen Shaw smile until one day when she was talking about you, in fact I’d never seen any other side of her except work, and then one day she started coming to me and telling me you were making her feel feelings, those were her exact words, and as much as she hated you for it, I knew you two would be stuck together forever.” Reese said “and it still freaks me out that you can make our robot happy.”

As much as Shaw wanted to kick him in the shins she also wanted to thank him. Yeah, he was a prized dick half the time but he was practically like her brother, and without him talking sense into her all those times she was struggling with Root, god knows where they’d be.She felt Root’s finger creep into the belt loop of her jeans and tug her closer.

“You know,” Shaw said. “I’m gonna say something, despite the fact you probably already know.” Root looked at her and chewed her lip almost nervously. “I probably used to have nightmares about waking up married with no recollection of what happened, and was never even being married to you, the ultimate pain in my ass. But you once said to me, that some day I was going to figure out that we’re perfect for each other, and I truly thought you were crazy when you said that. Then I find myself waking up next to you every fucking morning, and I realise, not only are you a ray of sunshine in this catastrophic shitstorm that we live in, but you’re also my wife, and before that the only person that’s ever made me feel… _anything_ , and if that wasn’t enough proof you were right,” Shaw shrugged, looking at Root who’s eyes were almost glazing over with tears. Shaw didn’t dare look at the others, they didn’t know this side of her. She didn’t particularly want them to. But this was for Root. It was always for Root. Forever.

“I love you” Shaw said and she swore she heard one of the others gasp. “And you’re still a pain in the ass, but you're my pain in the ass.”

There was a collective laugh, followed by a collective cheer of celebration. Glasses clinked together. Smiles spread. Root moved closer to Shaw slipping an arm around her waist and pulling her close, kissing her and not caring who was watching. She knew Shaw would care though, she could feel the ever so slight tension in her muscles, so Root pulled back a little. Her nose grazing across Shaw’s cheek as she whispered in her ear.

“I love you too” her breath hot on Shaw’s skin. Shaw looked at her with a smile and watched Root melt in front of her. She knew it was her smile, she couldn’t figure out why it got to Root so much, every goddamn time. She tucked a strand of Root’s hair that had fallen over her eyes behind her ear.

Then suddenly Michael Buble’s voice filled the underground station they were in and Root froze. She looked at Shaw immediately recognising the song. It was Love, Shaw had remembered from when they had drunkenly talked about it in Vegas the second time.

“But you hate this” Root said and Shaw just rolled her eyes.

“You don’t.” Shaw said. “And this is your day, so you win.”

“We were told you’d never had an official first dance” Lionel said and Root grinned. “At least at your own wedding anyway.”

“We’ll dance,” Shaw said then looked at Reese and Zoe “but you two have to join us.”

“But if you look cuter than us you have to leave” Root added and Zoe smirked.

“You definitely look cuter” Zoe said “John couldn’t look cute if he tried.”

Root grinned and pulled Shaw forward into more space, wrapping her arms around her wife and pulling her closer so their hips bumped together.

“This seems familiar” Root said quietly and Shaw just looked at her.

“Better song though, right?” Shaw asked and Root just nodded.

“Thank you” she said quietly “you’re…you’re so good to me.”

Shaw smiled a little. “You deserve to be happy.”

“I am” Root said “Like too much.”

“Good” Shaw said. “I’m surprised you haven’t cried.”

“I’ll cry later don’t worry” Root smirked and Shaw just reached up and kissed the end of her nose. Then Finch’s hand touched Root’s shoulder.

“May I?” he asked and Root smiled at him.

“You might have to fight Sam” Root said and Shaw just let go of her, glancing over at Fusco and pointing at him.

“You sure as shit don’t get out of this dancing thing.” she said and he walked over to her.

“How do you know I’m not the best dancer in this room?” he asked and Shaw smirked.

“Can we put money on that?” she asked.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> understated but fucking cute ceremony with close friends? nice Shaw ;) she dodged the dress too... well for now.
> 
> let me know what you think! I didn't want an elaborate ceremony, and I have no idea if this turned out the way I wanted it either ....I wrote this in like 45 minutes hahahahaha ahhh o.o
> 
> also don't forget to check Coffee & Handcuffs (prequel) for updates xx
> 
> love you lovelies <3


	55. Together

Root was laying on the floor of the hotel room. Shaw had insisted once they finally got away from the others that they may as well continue treating this like a proper wedding night and go stay at a hotel. Like, the most expensive one, and consider it another wedding present from Finch.

So Root was on the floor of the hotel room, giggling. Shaw was sitting straddled on top of her the champagne bottle in one hand, looking down at Root with an amused grin. Like a lot of the time they spent with each other they had taken off most of their clothes, Shaw was in her underwear and a black t-shirt, yet somehow she had managed to get Root down to just her bra and underwear. Which despite the fact Root had no idea this was going to happen, were almost perfectly selected. Black lace. Very sexy. It almost didn’t match the current giggly mess that Shaw was sitting on though.

“You’ve had way too much champagne” Shaw said holding the bottle out of Root’s reach, as she desperately tried to grab at it.

“Um, false.” Root said unable to stop laughing as she held her arm out and scrunched her fingers at the bottle. Shaw just stared at her with a grin.

“Can you explain why you can’t stop laughing then?” Shaw asked with an eyebrow raised. She could feel the bubbles gone to her head, but clearly not as much as Root who had somehow downed most of the bottle on the way to the hotel.

“Yes” Root said looking at Shaw with a wicked look in her eye.

“Oh really?” Shaw asked and Root just nodded letting her hand fall back down from where it had been lingering in mid air, landing on Shaw’s thigh she stroked it absentmindedly.

“I’m laughing because you,” Root said and Shaw lifted an eyebrow.

“Because me?” Shaw repeated.

“You married _me_ ” Root said. “You get all hot and bothered by _me_ , and I wear bunny slippers”

Shaw stared at her the corners of her mouth being tugged up into a smile as she rolled her eyes.

“That’s why you’re laughing?” Shaw asked and Root just gazed at her.

“No” she said hiccuping over a giggle. “But it’s still true.”

“You know what” Shaw said setting the bottle on the ground and leaning down so her face was closer to Root’s. “Opposites attract right?”

“Unless you’re talking about magnets” Root said with another giggle and quickly lifted her head off the ground to catch Shaw’s lips, but the kiss turned more into a bite and Shaw groaned.

Touching her lip with her finger and seeing a spot of blood, before looking back down at Root who stared at her with wide innocent eyes.

“You bit me” Shaw was shocked.

“No” Root said. Shaw rolled her eyes.

“You’re drunk” Shaw said as Root started running her hands up Shaw’s thighs again, her fingers dragging across her skin getting dangerously close to Shaw’s underwear line.

“Yes” Root said holding her gaze. “And I want to fuck you, but also…I want cake”

“Seriously?” Shaw asked then glanced at the wedding cake that was on the floor beside them. “Eat it then” Shaw said and looked back at Root.

“You could eat me while I eat it?” Root suggested and Shaw frowned.

“You’re gross” Shaw said. “I don’t wanna hear you orgasming with cake in your mouth.”

“But then you’ll know what I have to put up with” Root said with asmirk and flung her arm out to the side, edging the plate closer to her. Shaw watched her, then to her surprise Root’s fingers slowly delved straight into the cake. She grabbed a handful of it, her fingers and hand covered in icing and bought it to her mouth.

Shaw stared at her with an arched brow and watched Root shovel the handful of cake into her mouth, then clean all the crumbs off her chest neatly.

“What did I just see?” Shaw asked and Root let out a laugh.

“The cake annihilator” Root said and Shaw couldn’t restrain the laugh that tumbled from her mouth.

“Oh my god” Shaw shook her head.

“It’s better with fingers” Root said innocently reaching back for the cake again and Shaw just smirked.

“Is it just?” she asked watching Root plunge her fingers into the cake again. And as she did so, Shaw pressed her fingers to Root’s centre, a gasp falling from Root’s lips as she snapped back to look at Shaw.

“You said fingers” Shaw smirked and Root just stared at her, her hand still in the cake.

“What would happen if I said tongue?” Root shot back immediately and Shaw just smirked more, leaning closer to Root but reaching her arm out so she could grab a handful of cake.

“Who knows” Shaw said looking at her as she stuffed the cake into her own mouth with a grin. Root started to giggle again and ate the cake out of her hand.

“Sameen” she said with a smile and Shaw licked her fingers and looked at her. “I like it when you sit on me like this” Root said.

“Why?” Shaw asked glancing down at their position.

“Because I can see you,” Root said “And I can touch you.”

Root ran her sticky icing fingers over Shaw’s leg, and Shaw laughed.

“Very sexy, thank you” she said and Root beamed. “I’m gonna get off you though” Shaw said and Root pouted.

“Why?”

“You’re bony.” Shaw said and unstraddled Root, but grabbed her by then hands and pulled her up so they were sitting face to face on the floor. “You can still see me and touch me” Shaw reassured her.

“Mm but my head is spinning” Root said swaying in tiny circle where she sat and Shaw looked at her with a soft smile.

“Then just focus on me” Shaw said. “I’m not moving.”

Root looked at her, even though had been drinking she still had the ability to look at Shaw with such a deep love behind her eyes, that look that just crept up on Shaw and said _you’re everything_ , Root’s dark eyes silently making her feel like she was the only one that existed.

But Root _had_ been drinking, and so that look was only there momentarily tonight before suddenly she hiccuped again and looked down at Shaw’s hands.

“Sam, can I borrow your hair tie if I vomit?” she asked and Shaw smiled.

“If you answer a question, you can have it” Shaw said and Root looked up at her curiously.

“Shoot.” she said. Shaw bit the end of her tongue lightly, pausing for a moment before she asked.

“Do you think… that we’re going to be together for the rest of our lives?” Shaw asked and Root stared at her with big doe eyes, before blowing out a mouthful of air into Shaw’s face.

“That seems like a big question” Root said “for a hair tie.”

“You get a kiss and a hair tie” Shaw said and Root smiled.

“What if I get it wrong?”

“It’s not that kind of question, baby” Shaw said and tucked a strand of Root’s hair that was stuck of a bit of icing on her cheek, back behind her ear.

“Can I be honest?” Root asked and Shaw just nodded.

“Always be honest” Shaw said and Root looked at her.

“I know I’m like a little tipsy” Root said and Shaw rolled her eyes. _A little._ “But I’m still feeling the same thoughts as normal me”

“Okay” Shaw said not sure why she was feeling a knot twisting in her stomach.

“Sameen” Root said and put her sticky fingers on Shaw’s cheek. “You’re stuck with me until you die, whether that’s tomorrow or in two hundred years.”

The knot in Shaw’s stomach came completely undone as she looked at Root.

“Two hundred?” Shaw repeated and Root nodded.

“Me forever” Root said and Shaw smiled, looking down at their touching knees.

“You forever” Shaw said.

“And also,” Root added “I love you.”

Shaw looked back up at her. “I know” she said quietly.

“But Sameen,” Root said “It won’t stop.”

“That’s okay” Shaw said “I don’t want it to.”

Then suddenly Shaw was hit with the thought of, what if one day she woke up and everything that she _felt_ was suddenly gone, and she was back to how she always had been. What if one day she stopped feeling how she did around Root… then what would happen?

But her train of thoughts was halted by Root’s lips, lightly touching against hers.

“Sam” Root said against her lips “Whatever you’re thinking about, stop.”

They were still looking at each other, despite the ridiculously close proximity of their faces. Shaw could feel Root’s warm, sugar coated lips on hers.

“I’m right here” Root said and pressed their lips together into a kiss.

“I know” Shaw mumbled against Root’s lips. “I know.”

“Like, forever” Root said dragging her lips across Shaw’s to kiss the corners of her mouth.

“Yeah,” Shaw replied “me too.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sometimes I just gotta let them be normal and tipsy for a moment... especially on this particular night ;)
> 
> what do yooooou think? <3
> 
> [ Don't forget to read Coffee & Handcuffs... sometimes it's like you're getting two updates a day ;) ;) ]


	56. Mood Swings

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> warning: !!! X !!!

Shaw walked into the living room of the brownstone with a coffee in hand, and saw Root laying on the couch her fingers playing with the waistband of her underwear.

“Am I interrupting?” Shaw asked with an amused look on her face as she took a sip from her coffee, Root looked over at her and smirked.

“Where’s mine?” Root asked and Shaw rolled her eyes.

“This is yours” Shaw said walking round and setting the cup down on the coffee table in front of the sofa Root was spread out on.

“Do you think we have sex enough?” Root asked bluntly and Shaw raised an eyebrow.

“We had sex last night, and if you hadn’t decided washing your hair was more important we would have had sex again this morning” Shaw pointed out and Root just looked at her.

“But is it…enough?” Root asked.

“I mean, we have other things to do in a day besides each other” Shaw said and Root smirked.

“I think we used to be more creative” Root said “You used to get worn out so fast.”

“I’ve built up stamina” Shaw said noticed Root’s hand was still down her pants.

“Are you not…” Shaw stopped, she didn’t know what she was going to say, and she almost couldn’t believe it was a question she had to ask. A dry spell in their sex life was something they’d never had to worry about, and this wasn’t exactly a dry spell even now.

“Is it that time of month?” Shaw ended up rephrasing and Root frowned.

“No.”

“Where is this coming from?” Shaw asked. “Literally we are all over each other.”

Root sighed and Shaw rolled her eyes. Root was hungover, that much she knew, and that explained at least part of this weird mood.

“Do you want me to fuck you?” Shaw asked. “Again.”

“You’re making it sound like a chore, Sameen” Root frowned and Shaw rolled her eyes again.

“Hardly.” Shaw said and Root glared at her. “You _know_ how much I like touching you, can you please not bring your grouchy mood into our sex life?” Shaw asked and Root stared at her.

“Grouchy?” she echoed and Shaw sighed loudly.

“You’re probably just tired, I know you haven’t been sleeping a lot” Shaw said.

“I’m fine” Root practically snapped. Shaw went to walk out of the room, but instead she came back, knowing that wouldn’t solve anything. And when Root was acting like this, leaving it was never an option.

Shaw sighed. “I know what you need, but you’re not going to like it.”

Root looked at her expectantly and raised an eyebrow when Shaw just stared back.

“You used to use it on me all the time” Shaw smirked and Root’s eyes widened as she realised what Shaw was talking about.

“I’m pretty sure that’s too big for me” Root said and Shaw looked at her.

“Wanna find out?” Shaw asked and Root stared at her, clearly still in a mood.

“Fine” Root said and pulled herself off the couch. “But I have to pee first.

*

When Root came back into the living room Shaw had taken her spot on the couch and was wearing Root’s strap on dick, it was one of the larger ones in Root’s collection and it looked even stranger to see it on Shaw, since she was always the one that wore it.

She remembered one of Shaw’s moods was fucked out of her by this thing when they first met. She doubted it would do the same for her, considering she hadn’t even tried it.

“Take a seat” Shaw smirked and Root tried not to smile at the excited look on Shaw’s face. Root pulled her underwear off as she walked over to Shaw, dropping them on the floor, she climbed onto Shaw’s lap and balanced at the edge of Shaw’s knees grabbing the tube of lube from beside Shaw.

“You look like you’re about to go to war with this thing” Shaw said with a frown as she looked at the expression on Root’s face. “You don’t have to do this.”

“I want to.” Root said and Shaw just watched her.

“Babe,” Shaw said and Root automatically looked at her. It was the simple nickname that Root almost couldn’t get used to, but it made her want to melt regardless. Shaw was looking at her with dark gentle eyes.

“One for good, two for stop” Shaw said holding up her fingers and Root just nodded. Shaw frowned again and bought her hands up to Root’s face tucking her hair behind her ears so she could see Root’s entire face. “Seriously, I’m _not_ pressuring you.”

“I know you’re not” Root said but something about her just wasn’t quite right, despite the fact she could feel Root was wet against her leg. There was something she couldn’t quite put her finger on. But before she could think about it any further Root wiggled forward, lifting herself a little off Shaw’s legs and lowering herself slowly onto the dildo. Root’s eyes shut. Shaw’s hands moved to her hips to guide her.

Root let out a groan as she eased further down it, letting it push further inside her. The weight from her made the base press down into Shaw’s clit, and instinctively she moved pushing her hips forward which of course, pushed the dick further into Root, who’s eyes popped open.

“Fuck” she muttered and Shaw held her hips carefully.

“Too much?” Shaw asked and Root just shook her head. Shaw knew somehow she was lying, and she didn’t know why Root was doing this, in fact she almost regretted mentioning it to her. It was this fucking mood, usually bought on by the absence of The Machine in her ear.

Shaw moves slowly, rolling her hips up and down gently squeezing Root. Root moans and writhes on Shaw’s lap, her head falls back a little as they fall into rhythm and she starts to move with Shaw. Shaw watches her face carefully before picking up any speed. She remembered it took her at least two goes to get used to this size, it made her feel ridiculously full. But so good.

As Shaw starts thrusting harder Root’s moans grow louder, she pulls herself into Shaw, nails digging deeply into Shaw’s back, occasionally biting down on Shaw’s shoulder. Root’s taking deep unsteady breaths and Shaw is doing most of the work at this point, but she doesn’t stop. Her hands move around to Root’s ass, squeezing it lightly, letting her fingers roam a little, wondering if she’ll get in trouble, although today Root seems fine with letting her be in charge. That Fucking Mood, Shaw thinks. She never knows what to do with it. Damn Machine. Shaw winds Root up even more and she sunk down further onto the dildo letting out a loud groan, enough to make sure pull back a little and check on her. Root rides her hard and Shaw keeps moving, getting faster and faster feeling Root’s thighs clamp tightly against her own knowing she must be getting close. The base grinding against Shaw’s clit making her hot and aroused. Then suddenly Root is tapping two fingers on Shaw’s shoulder.

“Sam” she breathes heavily and Shaw immediately stops, practically grabbing Root by the hips and lifting her off the dildo. Root doesn’t move for a moment and then eventually rolls off Shaw and crosses her legs tightly. Shaw frowns, pulling off the straps and dropping the dildo on the ground, then pulling Root into her.

“Talk to me” Shaw asked and kissed Root’s temple. Root wrapped her arms around Shaw’s neck and basically attached on to her like a baby. “That hurt, didn’t it?” Shaw asked. The lack of Root’s reply was enough to tell Shaw that she was right, and that Root was now probably embarrassed, which would only make the mood fucking worse. But at least she was wrapped around Shaw.

Shaw pulled Root closely, their sweaty bodies touching, sticking together. She held Root close to her knowing it was helping her, feeling her ragged breathing start to calm down, move back to normal less racy breaths. Root rested her chin on Shaw’s shoulder and still said nothing.

“Hey beautiful,” Shaw said softly and Root lifted her head to look at Shaw who was playing with the ends of her hair. “Are you alright?”

Root just nodded a little.

“Verbal confirmation, please” Shaw said.

“I’m fine” Root said quietly.

“Fine isn’t a good word” Shaw said and Root just stared at her.

“I’m okay, Sam” Root said and Shaw nodded.

“You remember I’ve had to tap out before too, pretty sure you had me near tears before I remembered the safe word” Shaw smirked and Root just smiled a little. Shaw kissed the end of Root’s nose. “I’m sorry She’s not talking to you.”

Root looked surprised for a moment, forgetting that by now Shaw could decipher practically all of her moods and why they were happening.

“She gives me space sometimes” Root shrugged. “I don’t know why.”

“So you can be a person” Shaw said. “which doesn’t mean you need to sit on that shredder, even if you’re idiotic wife suggests it.”

“You’re not an idiot” Root said with a smile and Shaw raised an eyebrow.

“You might say something different when you try standing up” Shaw said and Root just giggled then nestled her face back into the hollow of Shaw’s neck, shutting her eyes and breathing in Shaw’s warm scent.

“You’re cute when you’re cuddly” Shaw said.

“You’re cute always” Root said and kissed Shaw’s neck, then rested her chin on it.

“Even when I’m ramming you with…”

“Stop.” Root said and Shaw shut up, with a small smirk.

“Do you want to sit on an ice pack?” Shaw asked and Root lifted her head to glare at her. But as Root was glaring, Shaw was smiling and Root gave in after about three seconds and leaned forward kissing Shaw hard on the mouth. Their teeth bumped together once as Root pushed her tongue into Shaw’s mouth, letting it explore, take over. Shaw moaned. And then Root pulled back.

“Your fucking smile” Root muttered as she went back to resting her chin on Shaw’s shoulder, still clinging to her like a baby animal.

Shaw ran her fingers up Root’s spine and wondered how long this mood was going to be hanging around for. It was barely noticeable to some people, it was only the slightest change in her personality, everything was less smooth, more jolted and sudden. Like she was making split second decisions. The way she talked went from emotionless to snappy in two words.

Usually Shaw would just keep her distance, but that was before they were married.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i really have no idea what this is, it just happened. let's go with it. it can't all be sunshine and rainbows forever....yay mood swings, what's Shaw gonna do. Or what's Root gonna do :O
> 
> let me know what you think lovely humans x
> 
> Coffee & Handcuffs is updating in a few hours and I need to go bath in holy water ok cool


	57. Distance

It had been a couple of days now and Shaw had felt like she had barely seen Root. They had gone from the high point of their relationship straight down to a low. Shaw got it, kind of, nothing could top having a wedding on your birthday, and she knew Root probably had already imagined it would just go downhill from there. But Shaw hadn’t anticipated it actually would.

Not that anything much had changed which was the infuriating part. It just seemed like Root was unplugged, she was hardly sleeping, barely touching food, conversations were almost a joke. Shaw didn’t know what to do. She knew The Machine was probably the only one that could fix it, and she despised that. The fact she had to share her relationship with a machine in general had always bugged her more than she had let on. But of course she tolerated it, because she loved Root.

Although that moment of unsettled thought was still lingering on her mind from the hotel that night. What would happen if one day she woke up and the feeling was gone? It was practically a miracle that she could _feel_ anything at all, so what if this was just a glitch? And one day she woke up and she couldn’t look at Root in the same way?

Since Root hadn’t been much of a conversationalist the past couple of days Shaw had more than enough time to mull this over, coming to no conclusion, and ultimately freaking herself out even more.

Shaw had just taken care of a number, she had walked in the door and gone straight to the kitchen, but when she walked in she was greeted with Root. Unexpectedly home, sitting on the counter with the first aid kit out and a bloodied knuckles.

“What happened to you?” Shaw asked bypassing her to get to the fridge, grabbing a beer and using the counter to pop the lid off. She walked back around and stood a meter from Root inspecting her wound from afar.

“And if you say _nothing_ , I will put you through a wall” Shaw said “I’m sick of your one word answers.” As soon as the words left her mouth Shaw took a mouthful of beer. _I sound like my mother_ she immediately thought. Not so much the hostility but definitely the part about one word answers, which almost made her laugh. Who knew she’d be telling anyone off ever about one word answers?

Root raised an eyebrow. “What does it look like?” she said and lifted her hand. Shaw frowned.

“Root,” she said waiting for Root to turn her attention back to Shaw instead of riffling through the first aid kid. Finally she did.

“Lose the attitude” Shaw frowned. Root needed to be pulled out. And Shaw watched the change on Root’s face as she snapped out of it a little.

“I’m sorry” she said quietly “This isn’t your fault.”

“Yeah, exactly” Shaw said.

Shaw watched as Root wrapped the bandage round her hand several times before securing it tightly. Root looked up at her. She looked exhausted, her eyes were tired and lost, but Shaw still wanted to pull her close. As she looked at Root, and the distance between them she wondered what it would be like if she looked at her and didn’t feel a thing. She had _always_ felt something with Root, since the very beginning, even if she ignored it for a while it was still there. But she couldn’t shake the thought of it somehow going away suddenly.

Root didn’t even notice the distance in Shaw’s eyes, she packed up the first aid kit and glanced over at Shaw before she walked out of the room.

Shaw stared at the spot where Root had just been standing and shook her head. She knew Root would come around, but she wasn’t exactly a fan of her current plan; grin and bare it. She took another sip from her beer and set it down on the counter, looking over at Bear who stared at her as if to say. “Well fuck, I don’t know either.”

Suddenly Finch’s voice was in her ear.

“Sameen,” he said. “We have _another_ number.”

“Great” Shaw muttered. “Who is it?”

“An old friend of yours,” Finch said and Shaw frowned trying to think of who it could be. “I thought you might want to handle this one yourself, I’m sending you the location now.”

Shaw sighed and was just pulling her phone out to see who it was when Root walked back into the room again. As Shaw was sliding her phone back into her pocket she saw the face on her screen and almost choked on her breath. It was Tomas. She looked back up at Root.

“Why do I feel like I’m always letting you down?” Root asked and Shaw just stared at her, the image of Tomas distracting her from Root was saying. What was he doing back? And why was his life in danger again? Or rather, what was he planning on doing?

“You’re not” Shaw answered and Root frowned, leaning on the counter in front of Shaw. “I’m sure it’s just a feelings thing,” Shaw said absentmindedly still wondering about Tomas. “You should be lucky you have them.” she added her earlier thoughts creeping back into her mind, which only deepened Root’s frown.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Root asked and Shaw just looked at her.

“I have to go.” Shaw said and grabbed her keys off the counter, Root watched her in confusion and followed her all the way to the door.

“Wait, Sameen” Root said reaching over Shaw and shutting the door as she opened it. Shaw turned to look at her expectantly.

“What?”

Root just stared at her, unsure what to say. She opened her mouth, the frown still creasing her forehead, she shook her head and then closed her mouth again.

“Nothing.” Root said and Shaw rolled her eyes pulling the door open again.

“Bye” Shaw said and bounced down the steps towards her car. Root just watched her leave feeling even more lost than she had a few moments ago.

Root went down the steps following Shaw and folded her arms watching Shaw get into the car.

Shaw glanced over at her and rolled the window down.

“Yes, Root?” she said and Root just frowned.

“You’re mad.” Root said and Shaw’s grip tightened on the wheel a little.

“Nope” Shaw said and Root leaned down her head in the window.

“Then what?” Root asked.

“I’ve been asking you the same thing for days” Shaw said with a shrug. “And you say, it’s _nothing_ ” Shaw paused and let out a breath. “Look, I’ve really got to go.”

“Are you gonna tell me where?” Root asked and Shaw just looked at her.

“Does it matter?” she asked then saw the look on Root’s face change from a frown to almost an instant sadness. Immediately giving in to that face, Shaw leaned over, her face close to Root’s.

“Kiss.” she demanded and Root closed the gap between them kissing Shaw’s lips slowly then pulling back, not lingering.

“It always matters to me” Root said quietly, but Shaw still didn’t answer, instead she turned the engine back on and pulled on her seatbelt.

Root moved away from the window and Shaw put it back up before driving off. Root felt a sinking feeling in her stomach, suddenly feeling completely abandoned by both The Machine and her _wife_. She knew Shaw probably had another number, and Root knew Shaw wouldn’t mention it to her for the obvious reason of, The Machine was still giving them numbers, but not talking to Root.

She was still standing on the sidewalk with her arms tightly folded across her chest when Sarah, their neighbour called out to her from where she was getting into her car.

“Hey Samantha” she said and Root almost forgot to turn around at the sound of that name. She stretched a half decent fake smile across her lips as she raised a hand in acknowledgement to her neighbour before quickly starting back towards the door.

“I just can’t get over how cute you two are” Sarah said and Root realised she must have seen her following Shaw out to her car. “I wish Paul came out to kiss me goodbye” Sarah continued and Root just looked at her. _She doesn’t even realise,_ Root thought. _She doesn’t even realise that was by far one of the worse goodbye’s we’ve ever had._

“Just force him to” Root said before she disappeared back inside and shut the door behind her. Leaning back on it and squeezing her eyes shut. _Don’t cry_ she told herself. _You don’t need to fucking cry._

Root twisted her wedding ring around her finger, it was more of an anxiety thing then anything else. She knew she had been acting like a brat, but she couldn’t help it. Going from having a voice in your ear almost constantly, to being plunged into silence without direction, it wasn’t the easiest thing to deal with. Although when it had first happened this time she had almost forgotten about it entirely, with Shaw being so incredible, their wedding ceremony. Everything. And then it was over, and she had woken up to silence. And it hurt.

Sucking up her tears in a hitched breath she went upstairs and quickly got changed, her hand aching under the bandage she realised driving her bike was going to be harder than normal. Or she could take the subway. She sighed. Grabbing her jacket and Bear and deciding to walk instead.

By the time she got to Finch’s a light rain had turned into a more heavy shower and both her and Bear were decently soaked. Bear shook the rain off his coat as soon as he walked in the door and Finch turned around at the familiar sound, raising an eyebrow when he saw Root.

“Root,” he said. “To what do I owe the pleasure?”

Root shrugged, pulling off her wet leather jacket and dropped it on the coatrack.

“I thought Bear might want to see you” Root said and watched as Finch scratched Bear’s ear with a smile. She sat down at the other chair next to Finch’s computers and looked at them, seeing a photo of Tomas in one of the half hidden tabs.

She immediately sat forward and looked at Finch.

“Where’s Sameen?” she asked and Finch raised an eyebrow.

“Considering she’s your wife, I’d assume you would know more than I do.” he said and Root rolled her eyes reaching over him and bringing the photo up on the screen.

“Is she with him?” Root demanded and Finch looked at the photo then back at Root and frowned.

“Did she not tell you?” he asked and Root just stared at the screen, her lips pressed firmly together. “Is everything okay?”

“Oh it’s just fine” Root said and Finch tentatively put his hand over hers. Root looked at Finch’s hand and sighed.

“He’s just the number right?” Root asked her eyes shutting lightly.

“Yes” Finch said. “I figured Sameen would want to deal to him.”

“Deal to him?” Root echoed. “Why would you think that Harold? Because she fucked him last time?”

Finch’s eyes widened in shock at what she said, and the way she had suddenly snapped at him.

“She what?” Finch said his eyes still wide as Root looked at him.

“As if you didn’t know” Root rolled her eyes. “You’re the one that wanted our ceremony so bad Harold, and now you’re trying to sabotage our marriage?”

Finch frowned. “Root,” he said shaking his head. “Stop, you’re just projecting, Sameen is not going to cheat on you with… Tomas, she honours your marriage you must know that.”

“Sure” Root said “but you didn’t see how fast she walked out the door this afternoon.”

Finch stared at her with deep concern, not so much for Root, but for what he had done. He moved out of the way of the computer, his direct communication line to Shaw suddenly free. Root looked at him, then the computer and shuffled over. Hitting the button and immediately hearing the computer connect to Shaw.

“What Harold?” Shaw’s voice hissed. Root almost felt bad for a split second before she smirked.

“Hey sweetie” she said with a smile. “You busy?”

“Root?” Shaw sounded shocked. “What the hell are you doing?”

“I’m checking in on you” Root smiled. “Tomas is a pretty bad guy, from what I remember.”

“Well you remember wrong” Shaw said “He’s fine.”

“Is he?” Root asked the sharp tone in her voice not going unnoticed.

“Root.” Shaw said. “Don’t do this now.”

Root went quiet. Her jaw locked as she stared at the photo of Tomas on the screen. _I should kill him_ she thought.

“Why, am I interrupting?” Root asked and she heard Shaw sigh loudly.

“No” Shaw said “It’s just annoying.”

Root swallowed hard, a lump forming in her throat. For some reason that time it stung more than usual. And she knew Shaw meant it to.

“Fine.” Root said and without a moment of hesitation hung up the line. She stared at the desk feeling mildly embarrassed, but when she turned around to see if Finch was there, he was gone. And so was Bear. She let her head fall into her hands and she pulled at her hair.

She _knew_ Shaw would never cheat on her. Not after that whole bad dream fiasco and that hadn’t even been real. But it was the fact she hadn’t told Root where she was going. The fact she was suddenly being so short with her. Root frowned, she knew she hadn’t been easy the past couple of days so she had been trying to stay out of Shaw’s way. Shaw had dealt with enough of Root’s issues, she didn’t want to burden her with a bad mood too. But apparently that had still made to worse, it had caused a rift in their seemingly perfect relationship. Days ago they had been all over each other, yes that had been one hell of a coping mechanism from the fact The Machine wasn’t talking to Root, but for it to suddenly crumble to this.

Root took a deep breath.

Then the line started to ring again. It was Shaw. Her finger hovered above the keyboard before she accepted the call. She waited for Shaw to speak first.

“I was going to say,” Shaw said. “It’s annoying that you still don’t trust me.”

It felt like one brick had been lifted off a very dense pile. Root almost smiled.

“I do trust you.” she said, and she meant it.

“Doesn’t feel like it.” Shaw answered.

“Sam, I trust you okay” Root said “Believe me.”

Shaw sighed. “Whatever.” she said. “I have to go.”

Root opened her mouth to say I love you, but the line disconnected. She frowned, pushing herself back from the desk and kicking her feet up onto it.

*

“Who keeps calling you?” Tomas asked when Shaw walked back into the bar from the ladies room and slipped back into the seat beside him.

“My _wife_ ” Shaw said and he raised an eyebrow at her.

“Wife?” he was surprised. “Didn’t see that one coming.”

“You know,” Shaw said with a playful smile “Tall brunette, pretty as hell, could murder you with a smile on her face if you so much as look at me wrong.”

“I could never look at you wrong” Tomas said, their eyes locked on each other.

“I’m sure she’s got other ideas about that” Shaw said with a smirk watching as he took a sip from his drink, and then switched their drinks around. She knew Tomas wouldn’t try anything with her but she had to be certain. He smirked as she did so.

“As if I’d use a date rape drug on you” he said and Shaw lifted an eyebrow. “You’re married.”

She smirked. “Sure,” she said “and with that look in your eye who needs one, girls would be falling at your feet.”

“But not you” he said and she rolled her eyes. “You always liked me, but you’d never swoon.”

“Oh I swooned” Shaw smiled. “Just when you weren’t looking.”

Tomas smiled at her. “It’s good to see you.” he said and Shaw looked at him before nodding and finishing his drink.

“Yeah” she said. “But it always means trouble.”

“So what?” he said “You like trouble.” he looked at her and winked and she just rolled her eyes again.

“Not your kind of trouble.”

“That’s not what you said last time.” he smirked.

“Last time I didn’t have a wife, who is all the trouble I can take.”

“Fair enough” he said. “I’d like to meet this wife of yours.”

Shaw almost laughed at the thought of it and shook her head. “No you don’t.”

“I think we’d get along” he said, always so sure of himself, always so softly spoken as he watched Shaw with his dark eyes. “We both have excellent taste in women, we like a little danger…”

“Don’t tell me you like tasers too?” Root’s voice said from behind him as she pressed her taser into his neck. It wasn’t on. But he immediately froze in place. She looked over his shoulder at Shaw whose eyes had widened, she looked like she had just been caught out.

Tomas saw the look on Shaw’s face but didn’t panic, instead, he started to laugh.

“Well timed.” he said and turned around to examine who the taser belonged to.

Root kept it pressed to his neck as she glared at Shaw before turning her attention to Tomas.

“Nice to finally meet you, Tomas” she said “Sam’s told me _all_ about you.”

Shaw shot her a look that she didn’t see.

“You know you almost ruined our relationship once, so if you thought for a hot second that I was gonna let you do it again, you’re dead wrong.” Root said, they all knew what she was talking about. Shaw had almost left with Tomas last time he was here. She had almost left with him when her and Root had just started sleeping together, when they had just established that it was going to be a thing. No it wasn’t quite a relationship but it was finally getting somewhere. And he had almost catastrophically messed that up, until Shaw realised she had wanted to stay.

“Hey, she’s _your_ wife” Tomas said and lifted his hands off his lap in surrender. “But last time she made her choices, that had nothing to do with either of us.”

Shaw looked frantically between the two of them. Wishing anything would happen to finish this conversation.

“You’re wrong” Root said. “It had to do with me.”

Tomas glanced over at Shaw who was plastered to the stool like she was watching an action movie. He smiled at her and shook his head.

“Okay, okay” he said and started to get up off his seat, leaning forward to Shaw. “You’re right,” he said, his breath on her neck. “She’s beautiful, congratulations.”

Root prodded him in the shoulder with her taser.

“Flirt with my wife one more time,” Root warned and he turned around to face her.

“You must be used to it, right?” he said with a wink and Root glared at him.

“Leave now, before I turn this thing on and doing some serious nerve damage” Root demanded and he moved around her, merging into the crowd heading towards the door. “And take a lesson in subtlety on your way home” she yelled out after him, before turning back to Shaw who was staring at her in disbelief.

“Says you” Shaw commented and Root narrowed her eyes.

“Outside. Now” Root scowled and Shaw quickly slid off the bar stool and followed Root out into the evening.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh man. Jealous Root?
> 
> Two updates today because why not - the other was on Coffee & Handcuffs ;)
> 
> Throw me your thoughts/feelings x


	58. Vexed

“What were you planning on doing?” Shaw asked once they were outside and away from the bar, glancing at Root’s weaponry that she had tucked into every available pocket.

“I don’t know” Root said. “Fuck him up?”

Shaw raised an eyebrow. “He’s our number, _sweetie_ ”

Root didn’t like that condescending use of her nickname and grabbed Shaw’s arm in a hard pinch not letting go until Shaw groaned and yanked her arm away.

“Stop it” Shaw growled and Root just shot her a look.

“You stop it” Root said. “He doesn’t need a babysitter.”

“I wasn’t babysitting” Shaw said and Root scrunched up her nose.

“Gross” she muttered and Shaw just rolled her eyes.

“Nothing happened.” Shaw said. “We had a drink.”

“And probably eye fucked” Root said and Shaw just stared at her.

“I mentioned you like three times” Shaw pointed out and Root glanced over at her as she stormed down the road. Shaw was almost at a run trying to keep up with her long legs.

“Oh yeah, what’d you say Sameen?” Root asked “I married a selfish, psychotic bitch?”

Shaw frowned. “No, I didn’t, I told him you were pretty and you’d kill him.”

Root screeched to a halt and looked at Shaw.

“You said that?”

Shaw nodded. Root let out a sigh and pulled a pair of handcuffs out of her back pocket. Shaw eyed them carefully.

“What are you doing with those?” she asked and Root slapped one of the cuffs on Shaw’s wrists, then the other on hers. Shaw let out a loud groan.

“This is unnecessary, Root” Shaw complained. Root ignored her and started walking again. “Aren’t you just going to get mad that I’m attached to you?”

“I’m already mad, Sameen” Root said dragging Shaw along with her.

“Are you gonna explain this to Harold then?” Shaw asked. “Because if he gets shot…”

“The only person whose gonna shoot him, is me” Root said. Shaw rolled her eyes.

“He’s a decent guy, Root” Shaw said and Root cringed.

“Okay, Sameen” she said.

“Is this what it’s like when you get jealous?” Shaw asked and Root huffed.

“I’m not jealous” Root insisted.

“So the handcuffs are for?”

“Precaution.”

“And we’re being cautious of what?” Shaw pressed, feeling quietly amused at Root’s protective behaviour. It made her smile a little, on the inside.

“Stop questioning me” Root snapped, and Shaw just stepped in front of her, forcing her to stop walking.

“You’re freaking out for no reason” Shaw said to her and Root rolled her eyes.

“I’m not freaking out” she said and as Shaw studied her face she realised Root was telling the truth. She did trust Shaw, and she wasn’t freaking out about Tomas. The truth was, she actually was just angry. Shaw frowned, she hadn’t wanted Root to so much as touch her after she’d had that bad cheating dream, but here was Root cuffing them together. The ultimate proximity test.

“Fine” Shaw said quietly staring into Root’s eyes trying to find anything. “Can you at least be reasonable?” she asked and rattled the cuffs.

“No.” Root said stubbornly. Shaw sighed looking to the side and then shaking her head.

“Babe I get the protective thing, I do” Shaw tried. “But seriously, I already need to pee and I will duck behind a car if I have to.”

Root frowned and looked down at their cuffed wrists.

“I left the key at Finch’s” Root said and Shaw’s face fell.

“It’s the thought that counts” Shaw muttered.

“I’m still mad” Root added. “We’re having a shitty day, and then you go out and start flirting with tall, dark and desperate”

Shaw quirked an eyebrow and smiled a little. “I wasn’t flirting.”

“Tell that to your face, Sameen” Root frowned. “I’ve seen those eyes before.”

“What eyes? Root,” Shaw protested “I was probably talking about you.”

“Adorable.” Root said sarcastically as they started walking towards Finch’s.

They walked for a few blocks in silence, whenever they came too close to other people Root would grab Shaw’s hand to hide the metal then quickly drop it again once they’d past.

Shaw was the one who broke the silence though, unable to stand the angry silence for any longer.

“Are you giving me the silent treatment?” Shaw asked looking at the back of Root’s head as she trailed along behind her like a naughty child.

“If I wanted to do that I’d handcuff you to a pole and walk off” Root snapped and Shaw just smirked. Shaw suddenly remember that Root always kept a paperclip in her back pocket in case of emergencies, eyeing Root’s jeans she wondered how she could manage to slip it out without Root noticing, or slapping her hand away.

“Are you really that mad at me?” Shaw asked.

“I’m mad for a lot of reasons” Root answered and went one way around a pole while Shaw went the other way without further thought, then suddenly both their arms were wrenched back as the metal cuff hit the pole. Root growled and Shaw just winced.

Root stared at her and Shaw made the effort to go around the other side of the pole.

“Sorry” Shaw muttered and Root sighed lightly, Shaw could tell she was softening, at least a little. “Root,” Shaw said deciding to take her moment to try and get that paperclip.

Root looked at her impatiently.

“I just, I’m sorry” Shaw said “for how I left earlier”

Shaw used her cuffed hand to move a strand of Root’s hair back and slipped her other hand behind Root’s back while she was distracted.

“I know we’re adults, and we’re allowed to get annoyed at each other sometimes but” Shaw paused briefly as she realised the clip wasn’t in Root’s pocket. And Root was staring at her with a smirk.

“It’s in the other pocket you asshole” Root said the smirk immediately fading as she grabbed Shaw’s hand and threw it back to her side. “Cute apology though, if only you meant it.”

Shaw groaned. “I did mean it, kind of”

“You’re sleeping on the couch tonight” Root said and Shaw frowned.

“No I’m not.”

“Yes” Root said pulling open the door to Finch’s and dragging Shaw in.

“I didn’t even make you do that when I saw you cheating” Shaw protested.

“I didn’t fucking cheat on you” Root argued as they walked inside.

Finch was back at his desk and heard the two of them come in, looking between them with a frown hearing their bickering, and then seeing the cuffs attaching the two of them together.

“Sameen” Finch said “Need I ask?”

“No” Shaw said and rattled her cuffed wrist at him. “I don’t know where he is, but the only threat here is my _wife_ ”

Finch looked at Root who folded her arms neatly, taking Shaw’s hand with her.

“You better have the key Harold” Shaw gave him a warning look before she looked back at Root, who was contently ignoring Shaw.

“Why would I have the key?” Finch raised an eyebrow and Shaw looked desperate. Root just rolled her eyes and dragged Shaw over to the computers, reaching around the back of one of the screens and grabbing the key, then tucking it into her jacket pocket.

“What are you doing?” Shaw asked with a frown.

“You’re not really making a good case for me to release you” Root said and Finch lifted an eyebrow at the two of them. Shaw looked at him and then back at Root.

“Shouldn’t you be cuffing him?” Shaw asked and jabbed a finger at Finch. “This is _his_ fault anyway.”

“He wasn’t making eyes at Tomas” Root pointed out and Finch stared at Shaw.

“I wasn’t _making eyes_ Root” Shaw groaned loudly.

“I’m going to leave you two…” Finch started but the immediately both turned to look at him.

“No” Root and Shaw said at the same time and Finch quietly pulled up a chair at his desk and sat down.

Shaw turned back to Root with a sigh.

“I don’t get why you’re mad, Root” Shaw said. “I feel like you’re making this a big deal and it’s not.”

“Like you made a big deal out of a dream you had that I cheated on you?” Root asked and Shaw just frowned.

“Harold asked me to take this number, I was just doing my job” Shaw said calmly.

“Oh yeah, since we do we go for a drink with our numbers?” Root asked then looked at Finch. “Harry?”

Finch just shook his head, refusing to partake in this marital argument.

“I was tailing him and then I got made okay?” Shaw said “He saw me and then asked me to get a drink”

“You could have said no” Root said.

“He’s our _number_ ” Shaw groaned “if it meant keeping him out of trouble for the night, then of course I was going to.”

“And you wanted to see him” Root said and Shaw frowned at her.

“Why are you being like this?”

“Like what, Sameen?”

“This mood,” Shaw shook her head “it’s… impossible.”

Root just stared at her, lips tight, jaw locked. Finch looked away from the two of them.

“You’re the one that left this afternoon” Root said her tone adjusting from loud and argumentative to quiet, and almost sad. Shaw felt a twang of guilt.

“I was trying to talk to you” Root said “And you just left.”

“You have barely spoken to me for days” Shaw pointed out “I didn’t realise you had suddenly turned into an actual human being again and were ready to chat.”

Finch almost winced at that comment, feeling the sting that Root had also felt. She glared at Shaw angrily. Instead of arguing back though she just reached into her pocket and undid the cuff on her wrist, yanking her hand free and then dropping the back onto the desk. Root looked at Finch her jaw clenched, she didn’t say a word.

“I’ll see you later” Root said mostly to Finch, before turning and walking towards the door. Shaw glanced at Finch before looking at Root.

“So you’re just gonna leave?” Shaw asked and Root stopped.

“I don’t know Sam,” Root said before she turned around to face her “I thought I’d take a page from your book, considering you’re so good at walking out.”

Shaw glowered. “Root.”

Root stared at her waiting for her to say something else, anything else. Seconds passed. Root rolled her eyes and turned to leave, making it all the way out the door this time without Shaw saying a word.

Finch stared at the spot where Root had been standing seconds ago, dumbstruck but what he had just witnessed. Of course he had seen them argue before, he’d watched Shaw shoot Root in the shoulder, he’d seen them flirt and…he’d seen more than he had ever signed up for. But he had never seen them fight like that. There was so much emotion that he had never realised flowed between the two of them. They were so connected, more than he had ever anticipated, and he could see that when one of them was upset it hurt the other too.

He looked over at Shaw with a slight frown.

“Can I make a suggestion?” he asked and Shaw said nothing for a few seconds before she tore her eyes away from the door and looked at Finch. “Go after her. Now.”

Shaw looked at Finch for another few seconds before grabbing the key off the desk and heading for the door.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> when moody Root irritates annoyed Shaw .....really not a winning combination.
> 
> what do you think Shaw's gonna do? Or what's Root gonna do...she seems piiiiiiissseed. Literally no one is listening to her :(
> 
> let me know your thoughts xxx  
> thank you for reading!


	59. Obstruction

Root had made it at least a couple of blocks away before Shaw finally caught up with her.

“Okay, stop” Shaw said coming up beside Root after pushing several people out of the way to get to her wife. Root glanced at Shaw looking briefly startled to see her. Then even more so when Shaw suddenly slapped the cuff back on Root’s wrist, reattaching them to each other.

“What are you doing?” Root asked with a frown and Shaw just looked at her.

“We’re going home” Shaw said.

“I have things to do” Root tried and Shaw rolled her eyes.

“Really like what?” Shaw bit her tongue before she could make a comment about The Machine not being in Root’s ear. She was trying to make this better, not worse.

Root just shook her head and kept walking, leaving her handcuffed wrist limply by her side.

“Are you really not going to try and fix this?” Shaw asked with a frown and Root just shrugged.

“I’m tired” Root said simply and Shaw stared at her in disbelief.

“I came after you because I thought that’s what you wanted” Shaw said “And because I don’t want us to be arguing.”

“So maybe you should have thought about that first” Root answered.

“Root” Shaw protested “I am trying here.”

Root suddenly snapped, coming to an abrupt stop and turning to look at Shaw.

“So was I this afternoon,” Root said icily. “It’s not fun when no one listens to you, is it?”

They looked fixedly at one another, until Shaw finally started shaking her head.

“I’m sorry” she said and threw her hands up, half taking Root’s with her.But it were as if Root was looking straight through her, she turned and started walking again without even acknowledging Shaw’s apology.

Shaw was forced to keep walking with Root. She could tell Root was heading towards central park, which was technically on their way home, but she had a feeling it was going to be Root’s last stop.

“What do you want me to do then?” Shaw asked. “Just fucking tell me.”

“I don’t know, Sameen” Root said, it was that quiet tone. That quiet sadness and anger that she was trying to handle, which always came out in the softest way. It was almost worse than if she just yelled at Shaw. Shaw could handle violence and yelling, what she wasn’t so good at was Root’s quietness, and her uncertainty.

“Do you want me to take these off then?” Shaw asked and rattled the cuffs. Root just shrugged.

“I don’t know.”

“Well what _do_ you know then?” Shaw was starting to get frustrated, her voice rising a little.

“Do you think interrogating me is going to help?” Root asked her voice level, which almost made Shaw even more frustrated.

“I’m not-” Shaw started then cut herself off with a head shake and looked in the opposite direction from Root.

Root didn’t say anything else, neither did Shaw. They walked through Central Park, the trees were still missing their leaves, there was still snow stuck to the sides of the walkway. Shaw let out a breath and pulled them to a stop. She unlocked their wrists from the cuffs and tucked them into her back pocket. Root rubbed her wrist as they kept walking, and didn’t say thank you.

Shaw wasn’t entirely sure what she was meant to do now, Root was hardly in a cooperative mood.

“What did you want to say to me earlier?” Shaw asked finally after an unknown amount of silence. Root didn’t reply immediately.

“Why does it matter” Root said as more of a statement than an actual question. Shaw just turned to look at her.

“It matters.” Shaw said. “I want to know” she added after a beat.

Root was staring at the trees as they walked, it was pretty much dark, only lit by the street lamps in the park. It wasn’t the safest place to be at night, but considering Root’s amount of weapons and the fact they were both trained killers they were never worried about such a minor detail. It was also Root’s happy place, or at least one of them. She loved the park, the loved feeling like she was away from the clutter of the city, and her mind. A breath of well overdue fresh air was the usual driving force of her visits.

She was glad Shaw was there, angry or not, it did mean something to her that Shaw had come after her. She knew it was probably provoked by Finch almost having a heart attack after their little row right in front of him. But the fact that she listened, or made that choice herself, still meant a lot to her. A while ago it would have almost been a joke to assume Shaw would come after her… however as soon as Root thought that she changed her mind. Shaw had always wanted to come after her, whether they were on good terms or not.

Root glanced at her, half of Shaw’s face in the shadow, the other half lit by the park lights.

“I think I was going to ask you to stay” Root said “to be honest I really don’t know, I just didn’t want you to go because I guess I was feeling… lost”

Shaw looked at her. “Why didn’t you just say that?”

“You were already out the door” Root said “And I couldn’t find the right words, I didn’t even know what I wanted.”

Shaw frowned. “Do you know now?”

“No.”

Root wasn’t looking at her, her eyes were fixed straight ahead on the path. But Shaw couldn’t look away. She despised fighting with Root, yes they had their plethora of other battles behind them but for some reason this one felt different. Like an emotional attack, not that she knew what that would feel like. But the twisting feeling in her stomach wouldn’t go away. The fact that she was _so_ frustrated with Root for the way she was acting, the fact she couldn’t just come out and talk to Shaw. The fact that every time Shaw tried to make it better she made it worse, because she really didn’t know how to deal with this.

Shaw looked at Root. She traced Root’s profile with her eyes, the perfect point of her nose, the outline of her lips. _Please, come back_ Shaw thought. _I can’t do this without you._

“I want Her back” Root said softly and Shaw kept looking at her.

“What if She doesn’t come back?”

Root said nothing, as if that weren’t a possibility although she knew it was. The Machine had been giving Root more space since she and Shaw had agreed on their married terms. The way She backed off was frustrating to Root, but it were as if to say, you have Shaw now, you don’t need both of us, constantly. The Machine chose Shaw for Root. She is the human. She wins. But that didn’t mean Root could cope easily after being so used to having Her in her ear.

“I know you talk to Her about everything” Shaw said. “But I’m here too.”

“I know that.” Root said.

“So talk to me then” Shaw practically pleaded. Root turned to look at her, their eyes finally met even through the dark. But before Root had a chance to say anything, Shaw’s phone started ringing. Shaw ignored it, but Root just rolled her eyes.

“Answer it” Root said and Shaw shook her head.

“No.”

“Sameen” Root just said with a sigh, Shaw reached into her pocket and pulled out her phone glancing at the screen and seeing Finch’s name.

“It’s just Harold” Shaw said, but Root was looking in the other direction.

“It’s probably important” she said and Shaw just stared at her, before picking up the call.

“Not a great time, Harold” she said quietly but Finch barely listened.

“Sameen” he shouted “Tomas’s number just came up again, he’s in a lot of danger, I need you to go now”

“Harold” Shaw growled “Get Reese to do it, did you not just see what happened?”

“He’s working another number, I have no other option but you Sameen” Finch said and Shaw clenched her jaw glancing over at Root who wasn’t paying any attention to her.

“Send me the address” Shaw said. “But I have no guarantees.”

“Thank you, Sameen” Finch said then paused “How’s Root? Dare I ask.”

“Well about to be a whole lot worse” Shaw said and then hung up the phone.

“Obviously an emergency” Root anticipated looking back at Shaw the moment she put the phone back into her pocket.

Shaw looked at Root, unsure what to say, or how to explain what she was about to do. She eyed Root’s collection of various weapons that she had stashed on her body.

“Can you come with me?” Shaw asked and Root raised an eyebrow.

“Where?”

“Just, walk with me” Shaw said and started heading towards the park exit. She glanced behind her to make sure Root was following, she was. That was a positive sign. It would have been easy and almost expected if Root had rolled her eyes and walked off in the other direction. And when she figured out where they were going, she might just do that.

“Can I have a gun?” Shaw asked but Root just handed her a taser instead. Shaw stared at it with a frown before tucking it into the back of her jeans. Whatever, it’ll do.

Shaw stopped walking in a car park outside a club. You could feel and hear the clubs pounding bass from outside.

“What is this, Sameen?” Root asked finally looking around at where they were with a frown on her face. At that moment the backdoor to the club opened and Tomas stepped out with someone else. Root saw him immediately and reached for her gun. Shaw grabbed her hand to stop her. A second later a shot was fired, it bounced off the wall next to Tomas and hit his friend, dropping to the ground.

“Get down” Shaw yelled at him and Tomas looked over at her, with wide eyes. Finally, he was fucking scared. He ducked behind the closest car as another round of shots were fired. Shaw’s hand was still gripping Root’s wrist tightly, so she knew it wasn’t Root firing the rounds off.

They crouched behind a car. Root was glaring at Shaw.

“I can’t believe you” she said angrily.

“You said you wanted to fuck him up” Shaw pointed out. The firing stopped, Tomas made a run towards them. A few more shots barely missed him as she dove down next to them behind a large SUV.

“Ladies” he said with a smirk. “Finally it gets interesting.”

Root rolled her eyes at him, and Shaw was about ready to use that taser on herself.

“We are getting you out of here, and then you’re gonna get on a plane and leave forever, understand?” Shaw said and Tomas just looked at her, a smile twitching on his lips, then he looked back at Root.

“She’s mad” he said to Shaw, and Root gave him a thunderous look.

“Oh good you noticed” Root said from behind Shaw where she was leaning against the car loading her gun.

Shaw stare at Tomas. “Do not make this worse.” she warned him and he just laughed, as shots started firing at the car they were behind.

“This doesn’t seem like a bad situation” he said and Shaw rolled her eyes.

“My wife is more ready to kill you then whoever is firing those guns” Shaw said and could almost feel Root’s smirk behind her. Shaw turned around to look at her.

“Give me a gun and let me take these idiots out” Shaw said and Root stared at her before handing her a gun and rolling her eyes.

“Is your car here?” Shaw asked and Tomas nodded.

“Over there” he said and nodded to the other side of the car park and Shaw groaned.

“Let them finish this round then we run, yes?” Shaw said and Tomas nodded, Shaw looked back at Root who just shrugged.

They waited in a painful silence for the shots to stop then Shaw leapt up.

“Go” she shouted practically shoving Tomas to start moving, catching sight of the three guys that were reloading and firing Root’s gun at them. She could feel Root sticking close to her, their shots practically matching, taking two of the guys out, she managed to shield Tomas at the same time. It was almost assuring to know how well they still worked together as a team despite the obvious friction between them.

Shaw glanced at Root. It was a stupid mistake. And in that split second, her focus wavered, she felt the shot to her shoulder. Like a fiery puncture. Her shoulder jerked back and she stifled a groan, lifting her gun and firing a shot at the last man standing.

Root almost beat her to it, two bullets hitting him in the chest at the exact same moment. One from Shaw, one from Root.

Shaw shoved Tomas towards his car, taking the keys from his pocket and tossing them to Root.

“Get in and duck down” she told Tomas forcing him into the passenger side as she climbed into the backseat and half lay down.

“Where’d it hit you?” Root asked immediately as she started the car, reversing out and changing direction in one extremely fast move.

“Shoulder, I’m fine” Shaw said through gritted teeth finally feeling the pain of the bullet.

“You got hit?” Tomas asked incredulously. Root just shook her head at his comment. Tomas turned around in his seat to look back at Shaw.

“Worried?” Shaw asked sarcastically, and Root hit a corner hard before Tomas had a chance to reply, making both of them jolt to the side uncomfortably.

“Do you want me come back there?” Tomas asked and Root rolled her eyes. “Let me take a look.”

“For fuck sake” Shaw groaned pulling the taser from the back of her pants and flicking it on as she leaned forward pressing it to his neck. She felt the jolts leave her hand and buzz through his body until he was quickly unconscious.

Root’s eyes immediately widened as she saw him fall limply against the window.

“What?” Shaw asked when Root glanced over her shoulder at Shaw. “He wasn’t gonna shut up.”

“What happened to save the number?” Root asked.

“He’s unconscious, not dead” Shaw said. “For now.”

“Are you okay?” Root asked looking through the rearview and seeing the blood pool on Shaw’s shoulder.

“Yeah” Shaw said “Just stop taking such aggressive corners, it’s not helping.”

“Where are we dropping him?” Root asked with a smirk.

“The airport” Shaw said and Root arched an eyebrow.

“Oh you meant that?”

“Why would I not?” Shaw asked and Root just watched at the road. 

They drove in silence most of the way, the sound of the radio playing bad pop songs was the only thing that kept Shaw from going completely crazy. She tried to stop the bleeding from the bullet wound as much as possible by ripping a piece of her shirt and wrapping it around her shoulder with an annoying amount of difficulty, that practically wiped the rest of her energy. She lay down across the backseat, and let out a deep breath. She listened to the sound of Root driving and wondered how mad she still was. She wanted to just ask, just get it all out in the open so they could sort it out.

The car rolled to a stop, Shaw felt half asleep, but pulled herself up anyway. Her energy was drained, she felt a little light headed but she didn’t care. Kicking open the door she got out and opened Tomas’s door. His head was still hanging but she knew he would be near waking up.

“Come on” she said and slapped his face with her good arm. “Get out.”

She watched him come to, slowly, he looked around and then at Shaw. He smiled, not seeing Root leaning on the car next to Shaw.

“You gonna come away with me this time?” he asked with a smirk and Shaw rolled her eyes, grabbing him by the shirt with one hand and yanking him out of the car.

“Not a chance” she said and immediately took his seat in the car, before she collapsed.

“This is my last stop then” Tomas said as he looked at Root. Shaw watched through the wing mirror as Root pointed her gun at his head.

“Finally,” Root said “you’re starting to get it.”

Tomas just laughed and Root stared at him coldly.

“I like you, you know” he said and Root just rolled her eyes.

“I really don’t care” she said and he looked down at her gun.

“Are you going to shoot me?” he asked and Root kept her gun pointed at him for a solid few seconds before she let it drop to her side.

“Not today” she said “but if I ever catch you near my wife again, I’ll lobotomize you with my taser.”

Tomas smirked. “It’s a big world.” he said as she started to walk off.

“Not big enough” Root murmured watching him go, before she got back in the car and threw her gun in the glove compartment.

Shaw was leaning back against the headrest with her eyes closed.

“I didn’t hear a gun shot” she said hearing Root’s door shut and the engine start.

“Silencer.” Root replied and Shaw smirked.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ah man. at least he's gone.  
> although Root doesn't seem any less mad....
> 
> thoughts? feels? x


	60. Rattled

When they got home Root walked in the door first, pulling off her jacket and flexing her wounded hand, her bandage covered in fresh blood. Shaw went straight for the stairs, before she could even consider talking to Root about anything she needed to stitch herself up and throw back some painkillers, or whiskey. Whatever was closer. She could feel herself fading as she made it to the upstairs bathroom, pulling the first aid kit from the cupboard she sat on the floor leaning back against the sink. Slowly pulling off the make shift bandage, she gritted her teeth together. It went deep, but it was nothing she couldn’t handle.

Root appeared in the doorway, her arms folded across her chest.

“You’re gonna pass out before you get that finished” Root said and Shaw shook her head.

“You’re pale” Root said “I’ll do it.”

Shaw looked over at her. “I can do it myself, don’t worry.”

“I’m not worried” Root said “But you’re about to lose consciousness and you have an open wound.”

“You’ll stitch me crooked” Shaw said “because you’re mad.”

Root smirked and walked into the bathroom pulling a pair of latex gloves from the box on the sink.

“Now who said I was at that level of anger?”

Shaw stared at her. “Your face.”

Root glanced at her. “Let me do it.”

Shaw was reluctant, she could see Root was still mad. It was behind her eyes, but she could also tell Root had calmed down a little from how worked up they had both been earlier. Calm, or just exhausted. Probably the latter.

Root sat on the tiled floor next to Shaw and put the med kit between her legs.

“We always end up here” Shaw said quietly, her lips barely moving. She wanted to shut her eyes, but she knew she couldn’t.

“Bleeding in the bathroom?” Root said and Shaw just looked at her and nodded, a slight smile creeping onto her face.

Root inspected the wound, grabbing the forceps and glancing at Shaw before she pulled out the bullet.

“I’m irritated” Root said and Shaw looked into her eyes.

“I know” she said softly.

“I just wanted you close today, but I ended up feeling more abandoned than ever” Root said. “and you didn’t seem to care, it felt like you were trying to drive me to the snapping point.”

Shaw frowned. “That’s not what I-”

“Let me finish” Root said and delved the forceps into Shaw’s shoulder, all her muscles tightening at the red hot pain. “I know we have our differences, and sometimes it can feel like we’ve entirely lost our common ground, but we keep doing this to each other”

Root carefully extracted the bullet and reached her arm over into the sink letting it drop with a clatter.

“I _know_ I’m not the easiest person to deal with, I have an AI in my fairly psychotic brain and way too many high running emotions” Root continued, she was moving slowly, it was obvious she was tired. Shaw was starting to go numb from the pain, her head rested against the sink as she watched Root closely.

“It’s not that” Shaw said and Root just looked at her curiously. Shaw continued. “It’s when you get into those moods where you shut yourself off from everyone, including me.”

“I was trying to stay out of your way” Root said quietly as she cleaned the wound and Shaw tried not to wince in pain, it was by far not the worst thing she had felt, but it had been a fucking long day and she was so tired.

“I don’t want you out of my way” Shaw said “I want you to tell me when something is bothering you.”

“You were bothering me earlier” Root pointed out as she jabbed the needle into Shaw’s shoulder to start stitching it up. Shaw rolled her eyes to mask the flinch of pain.

“You and your fucking double standards” Root muttered as her dark eyes fixed on the needle, knowing she had to make the stitches to Dr Sameen Shaw perfection.

Shaw sighed. “That’s what was bothering you?”

Root stopped and looked up at her. “That and about twenty other things.”

Shaw frowned. “I was just trying to do my job this afternoon. That’s all it was.”

“Are you sure?” Root asked.

“Yes” Shaw said “So I slept with him once, that doesn’t mean that as soon as I see him again the same thing is going to happen. Things change. So do people” Shaw said. “And relationship statuses… if this is a trust thing again”

“It’s not” Root interrupted her “It’s a timing thing.”

Shaw just stared at her, watching her carefully pull the thread back and forward through her shoulder in a perfect line.

“I’m not saying you should be able to predict everything I do, Sameen” Root said “But fact you still left so quickly when you knew…”

“Am I not allowed to be annoyed?” Shaw said with a slight tone, but Root just tugged at her stitches before neatly tying and trimming the end. Shaw sighed loudly.

“I’m really too tired for this” Root just said quietly wiping a antiseptic across the stitches before taping a gauze lightly over the top. She got to her feet, pulling off the gloves and dropping them into the rubbish, filling a glass of water and handing it down to where Shaw was still sitting.

“When was the last time you slept?” Shaw asked “The beds been empty for the past couple of nights.”

Root just shrugged and sat on the edge of the bathtub.

“Will you come to bed now?” Shaw asked.

“You’re on the couch, remember?” Root said with a small smirk and Shaw just rolled her eyes.

“Don’t be a bitch” Shaw replied with a slight smirk as she looked at Root, who seemed even more exhausted now they were home. Her eyes seemed dull, her shoulders rolled forward in a slouch, every movement slower than her usual lighting speed as she tried to keep up with her brain.

They stared at each other too tired to speak, too tired to be able to figure out what they were meant to say to each other. Too tired to know who was right and who was wrong. Too tired to point fingers.

Shaw took a sip from the glass of water Root handed her, not realising how dehydrated she had become. Root pulled herself to her feet.

“Come on” she said softly “you need to get off the floor.”

Shaw was pale, she’d lost a lot of blood, a lot of energy literally drained from her body. Not to mention emotional exhaustion that was piled on top of things she wasn’t used to. Root hadn’t seen her like this before, so fragile, so tired.

She grabbed Shaw under her good arm and pulled her up to her feet. Shaw swayed and Root steadied her, before directing her towards their bedroom. Root guided Shaw to her side of the bed and sat her down, then Shaw fell back and looked up at the ceiling.

“Fuck” she grumbled, her eyes heavy, everything heavy and exhausted.

“Sameen you can’t sleep in skinny jeans,” Root said but Shaw was already shutting her eyes. They flashed open again as she felt Root undoing her zipper and button.

“I know you’re tired” Root said “but we’re almost there.”

She moved her hands under Shaw’s ass and started tugging the waistband of the jeans down, grabbing them from the sides once they were over her ass and wiggling them off her muscles and down her legs, letting them drop into a black pile on the floor.

“You just wanted to touch my butt” Shaw said sleepily and Root rolled her eyes moving Shaw’s legs onto the bed then climbing over the top of her, and collapsing into an exhausted heap beside her.

“Today sucked” Root said in a breath and Shaw turned her head to look at Root. Root’s leg was half over Shaw’s, her long hair touching Shaw’s arm, Shaw could feel her warmth even if they weren’t pressed against each other.

“But we made it” Shaw said and Root looked back at her. “And you got to kill a guy who thought flirting with a married woman was a good idea.”

“I didn’t kill him” Root said softly.

“I know” Shaw said.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> lol 60 chapters oops how did we get here :p in other news i dyed my hair pink....  
> annnd sorry for no update yesterday i literally fell asleep when i got home from work 
> 
> thoughts? feels? lemme know, you guys are awesome thank you for reading! x


	61. Unbearable

Shaw woke up first the next morning, she had forgotten about the shoulder wound until she rolled straight onto it and almost yelled out in pain as she quickly flipped back onto her back, her hand shooting up and pressing down on the bandaging.

Glancing to her side, much to her shock Root was still beside her, and very much asleep.

Shaw pulled herself so she was sitting up, propped back against the pillows. It was just getting light outside, a pale gold light falling through the gaps in the curtains, a streak of light falling across Root’s arm.

Shaw reached over and picked up a strand of Root’s hair and wrapped it lightly around her finger as she stared at her sleeping wife, it was nice to see Root looking so peaceful and rested. She knew how long Root could hold out without sleeping, an hour nap here and there and then she’d be awake again ready to go, no matter how tired she actually felt. It wasn’t healthy. It was probably why she’d been so moody. That and The Machine. Shaw sighed. That damn machine.

Root turned towards Shaw, her hand sliding out from under the covers and touching Shaw’s fingers that were tangled in Root’s hair.

“Hi” Root mumbled sleepily and Shaw smiled a little, feeling like perhaps they were finally out of the woods.

“Morning” Shaw said softly and Root puffed lightly.

“Can I stay here?” she mumbled.

“You can do whatever you want” Shaw said and Root cracked an eye open and looked at Shaw.

“I’m stay here” Root whispered sleepily and Shaw just nodded.

“Okay, go back to sleep” Shaw said running her fingertip down Root’s nose and giving the end a light squeeze. Root snapped her teeth at Shaw before brushing her hand away and rolling away onto her back with a yawn as she stretched out before going back to sleep. Shaw looked at her a small smile. God she was beautiful.

Shaw got out of bed and went down to make coffee. There was no new calls or messages from Finch and she wondered whether he was giving them the day off after the whole debacle yesterday. She wondered if The Machine was talking to Root again, wondering if that’s why she was suddenly sleeping so well. Or if perhaps Root had just stopped caring, and gave into sleep at her own will.

Shaw threw down some breakfast for Bear as she sat at the counter and drank her coffee, her eyes skimming over the newspaper. Bear practically devoured his food in two mouthfuls then sat expectantly staring at Shaw, his tail wagging.

Shaw lifted an eyebrow at him.

“Really?” she asked and Bear just tilted his head to the side and stuck his tongue out. Shaw rolled her eyes, finishing what was left of her coffee and holding a finger up to Bear.

“Let me change” she said to him before dashing up the stairs and pulling on some workout clothes before coming back down and seeing him sitting by the door with his leash in his mouth. Shaw grinned and hooked his leash onto his collar.

“Go easy on me okay sexy, my shoulder is a little achey” she said shutting the front door behind them, figuring Root wouldn’t even know she was gone. She would probably be asleep the whole day anyway.

Shaw took Bear into Central Park, she didn’t let him pull her past a gentle jog, feeling the strain on her shoulder with even the slightest movement.

Shaw thought about Root as she was running, and inevitably her brain bought her back to the annoying and improbable what if that one day she woke up and couldn’t feel the way she felt about Root anymore. What if suddenly she reverted back to the way she had always been. Purely driven by action and not emotion. What would she do, what would Root do? Would Root leave her? Would she have to leave Root? What if they stayed together and then she did something…because she couldn’t feel that connection to Root anymore. Something unforgivable like cheating. 

She had to admit to herself that part of the reason she agreed to get a drink with Tomas was to put out of her mind once and for all that the potential of her doing something…sociopathic that could wreck her marriage was no longer a possibility, that what she felt for Root overran any other desire or stupid attraction she might have. Like cheating. With Tomas. Which had happened once before, even though it had hardly been cheating. There had been an attraction and she had gone with it, because she didn’t care, or at least she fooled herself into thinking she didn’t care, about Root at least.

But getting that drink with Tomas last night had proven her right. Sameen Shaw had been conquered by Root. There is no way in hell she could even consider cheating without feeling sick to her stomach, without knowing the emotional damage it would do to Root, and _her_ would be enough to take her down. In a really bad way. What she felt for Root made her make all the right choices, it made her a good wife. Which is something she always thought was impossible. But what scared her shitless now, is that going away. Because this was like a bug in her code. She shouldn’t be able to feel like this. It crippled the sociopathic demure that she had lived with her whole life. That she was used to.

Suddenly Shaw noticed she wasn’t alone, someone was running along beside her. Before she turned to fight mode she glanced to see who it was and almost did a double take.

“Zoe?”

“Hey Sam” Zoe grinned keeping evenly paced alongside Shaw and Bear. “How’s the Mrs? Heard she got pretty rattled last night.”

“Is there no such thing as privacy” Shaw muttered then realised the irony in what she said. Zoe smirked.

“Don’t worry, it’s nothing flowers and sex can’t make up for” she said and Shaw raised an eyebrow wondering where she was going with this. “I’ve met John’s little therapist friend,”

“Is she still breathing?” Shaw asked and Zoe laughed.

“I don’t take quite as much pleasure in murder, Sam” Zoe said “but fuck I hate the bitch.”

“Is that what you chased me down to say?” Shaw asked with a smirk.

“No actually” Zoe said “I was actually going to ask if you wanted to double date?”

Shaw smirked “John know about this?

“No” Zoe smirked back “And I was going to ask your other half, but I can’t seem to get hold of her.”

“She’s asleep” Shaw said and Zoe raised an eyebrow.

“I just think we spend so much time holed up together it wouldn’t do us harm to have a night where we interact with other adults” Zoe said with a shrug and Shaw nodded.

“I’m gonna say yes, but only because I know it’ll make John super uncomfortable.” Shaw grinned wickedly and Zoe rolled her eyes with a smile. “And also Root digs that kind of shit” Shaw paused “to be honest it would probably be good for us too…”

As her sentence trailed off Zoe looked at her curiously.

“Everything okay with the favourite couple?” Zoe asked and Shaw just looked at her.

“Yeah” Shaw said with a nod “Yeah it’s…we’re fine”

“That doesn’t sound convincing” Zoe said “What happened?”

“You mean aside from last night” Shaw sighed and Zoe just looked at her waiting. “I don’t know…” Shaw knew exactly what it was and Zoe knew she had the answer too.

“Can I ask you something?” Shaw said.

“Anything.”

“Do you ever get worried that one day you’ll look at the person you’ve chosen to spend the rest of your life with and not feel the same way towards them anymore?” Shaw asked and Zoe’s eyes widened.

“Oh honey” she said and Shaw frowned. “Who _doesn’t_?”

Shaw quirked an eyebrow shocked to hear that response.

“Really?”

Zoe almost laughed. “People probably freak out about that every damn day.”

Shaw stared at her shocked.

“You can’t prevent that shit from happening” Zoe said to her “And if it does happen it was probably a long time coming, not just all of a sudden.”

Shaw frowned “okay but…I’m”

“You’re worrying about something that will probably never happen” Zoe finished for her and started to slow down. “This is my exit” Zoe said as they approached a park exit. Shaw just stared at her wondering how she seemed so sure of what she was saying.

“Seriously Sam, if you two were gonna fuck each other up, it would have happened once already” Zoe said as she started to leave. “Oh, and one more thing”

“What?” Shaw asked.

“What would you get John for his birthday?”

Shaw smirked. “A hawaiian shirt.”

Zoe rolled her eyes. “Right, I should ask Root”

“She’d get himdictionary, and add a K in” Shaw said with a smirk and Zoe laughed.

“I’ll text you about dinner” Zoe called out as she ran off “And don’t overthink!”

*

Shaw had barely made it back into the house and let Bear off his leash before Root pounced on her. Shaw almost threw an elbow up in defence, mostly out of fright considering she had assumed Root would still be in bed asleep.

“You left” Root said softly moving into Shaw’s space grabbing her by her ponytail and jerking her head back hard, a firm grip holding Shaw’s head back at the perfect angle for Root to be able to kiss her. They looked at each other for a split second before Root did just that. Root kissed her hard, pushing her tongue into Shaw’s mouth, getting lost in a momentary passion until Shaw groaned. She was still sweating from the run, and Root had a little too much pressure on her wound. Root released her and Shaw took a step back. She stared at Root with dark eyes, suddenly extremely turned on. Root’s smell still lingered on her, sleep and sweet kind of vanilla.

“I’m guessing you have more energy now” Shaw said and Root grinned, biting her lip.

“All fuelled up” Root replied and Shaw just looked at her, there unfinished conversation from last night somewhat forgotten.

“Upstairs?” Shaw asked and Root just shook her head.

“Down here” she said and walked into the living room grabbing Shaw’s hand and towing her behind.

“You’re gonna wreck our couch” Shaw said and Root smirked.

“Actually you’re the one that put a hole in the last one” Root said and walked straight over to the pool table, pulling herself up onto it and letting her legs swing a little. Shaw followed her over and stopped in front of her knees and raised an eyebrow.

“Oh you wanna ruin the pool table instead?” she asked and Root grinned.

“It’s not like I got this because either of us enjoy playing pool” Root said.

“I might” Shaw shrugged and Root rolled her eyes.

“Not as much as you’re gonna enjoy this” Root said and wrapped her legs around Shaw and tugged her closer, her hands taking Shaw’s face and bringing their lips together gently. Shaw let out a small exhale as they kissed, she’d missed this. Their closeness. Root’s touch. Kissing. Kissing was her favourite part. Root was so soft, yet she could easily be so mean. Biting and nipping, but not today. Today she was soft. Gentle. Tracing Shaw’s lips with her own, carefully kissing every inch, letting it linger, tasting her lips, savouring. Shaw’s hands found Root’s hips. She wanted them so much closer. One of Root’s hands was tangled in her now loose ponytail, her other hand pointing south against Shaw’s stomach, her middle finger edging under Shaw’s exercise tights. Shaw could feel the heat between her legs, she wanted Root. There was no further foreplay from Root today, suddenly she was inside Shaw. Driving two fingers in deeply hitting the exact spot that made Shaw moan into Root’s mouth and dig her fingers into Root’s hips.

Root couldn’t help but smirk, she loved hearing Shaw moan. She drove her fingers in harder and deeper and Shaw moaned again.

“Does that feel good, Sameen?” Root said breaking away from their kiss, her lips pressed to Shaw’s ear as she whispered the words.

“Mm, fuck” was all Shaw managed as Root did it again with her fingers, perfectly timed, a second and a half apart. Just enough for Shaw to recover before it happened again. But in a split second when she wasn’t moaning her brain started thinking about her conversation with Zoe. And just like that, she was distracted. Shaw suddenly grabbed Root’s hand and pulled it from her pants.

Root looked at her with wide eyes, and concern.

“What?” she asked almost desperately.

“Just wait” Shaw said resting her forehead against Root’s shoulder, still holding Root’s wet fingers. She pressed her crotch against Root’s knee and growled in annoyance feeling the arousal was still there even at the most gentle touch, but her mind was just…elsewhere. So maybe it wasn't just her that worried about losing feelings for someone, but it was a almost unbearable thought thinking one day this might just go away.

“Sam what is it?” Root asked sliding her free hand down the back of Shaw’s head and neck, grabbing it gently and pulling her head back so they were looking at each other.

“I just,” Shaw looked at her and could see the confusion and anxiety building behind her light brown eyes. “I need to talk to you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> haha "i need to talk to you" probably one of the most terrifying sentences someone could hear.... Root is probably going to freak out...again, uh oh.  
> they're getting somewhere though, AND a double date lol 
> 
> thoughts? feels? suggestions? anything? always open to hear back xxx  
> thank you for the support!


	62. Coffee and Flowers

_I need to talk to you._ Six word was all it took for Root’s brain to unleash absolute hell in her mind. Thoughts running rampid at 1000 miles an hour. It almost made her feel dizzy.

“Oh my god” Root said as soon as those words left Shaw’s mouth. “You slept with him!”

The words came tumbling from her mouth before she had a chance to even think about it. Shaw just stared at her blankly as if whatever sound had come out of her mouth hadn’t been English.

Root immediately pulled her arms away from Shaw roughly, whacking her across the face and chin as she did so. Shaw went to grab her arms determined that Root hear her out before freaking, but apparently she was too late for that. Root swiped Shaw’s hands away and violently grabbed Shaw’s wounded shoulder driving her thumb into the wound as hard as she could. Shaw growled loudly and wrapped her fingers tightly around Root’s wrist, wrenching it away from her shoulder, taking both of Root’s hands and pinning them behind her back firmly.

“Listen to me” Shaw said sternly and Root was practically panting in Shaw’s face. Her cheeks flushed red with anger.

“Fuck you” Root said and drew her head back before slamming it forward against Shaw’s in a hard headbutt.

Shaw automatically let go of Root stumbling backwards, a hand flying up to her forward as she felt her brain rattle.

“Shit” Root groaned and when Shaw opened her eyes saw Root rubbing her own head in pain.

“What the fuck” Shaw mumbled and moved back towards Root. “Did you just head butt me?”

Root just glared at her. Shaw kept her hand over her forehead, her head now thumping in agony as well as the rough pain of her shoulder after Root attacked it with her thumb.

“Are you done?” Shaw asked. “I literally haven’t even said anything yet.”

“I don’t want you to” Root hissed and Shaw tentatively stepped into Root.

“Well you’re going to” Shaw said and Root just frowned.

“You can’t make me” Root said and Shaw rolled her eyes.

“I can” she said “and it doesn’t involve head butting either”

Root folded her arms across her chest.

“Are you going to listen or do I have to tie you up?” Shaw asked and Root just shook her head.

“You didn’t even deny it” she said quietly and Shaw just groaned.

“Root” she said loudly in annoyance, but Root just stepped forward lifting her knee up and driving it forcefully between Shaw’s legs banging it hard against her crotch. Shaw’s jaws clenched. _For fuck sake Sameen, get on with it_ she scorned herself for taking so much physical abuse when she hadn’t done anything. Although there was a slight amusement she found in the reaction she was getting from her wife when suspected of doing something wrong. _Note to self; never actually do something wrong._

“Will you stop” Shaw growled grabbing Root as she tried to walk out of the room spinning her around so that they were facing each other and driving her back until Shaw had her pinned against the wall, an arm barred across her chest so she couldn’t fight back.

“I am _trying_ to tell you something” Shaw said shaking her head and Root just sent an icy glare towards her, her jaw tightening as she pretended to have the patience.

“I thought seeing as though we’re married and all it’s fine to openly talk about things” Shaw continued “I didn’t realise I was going to get kneed in the crotch and head butted by asking to talk to you”

“So fucking say it already, Sameen” Root spat and Shaw just stared at her.

“You need to calm down” Shaw said cooly. “Like for real, the explosive temper is hardly necessary when you don’t even know what I’m trying to say”

“Well it can’t be anything good” Root said immediate;y “if you started with _I need to talk to you_ , that never means anything good Sameen”

Shaw raised an eyebrow. “It means I need to talk to you, and I want you to be an adult about it not start beating me up like I stole your favourite teddy”

Root glowered in anger and pushed against Shaw’s arm that was pinning her to the wall, but she wasn’t strong enough, not against Shaw.

“I ran into Zoe this morning” Shaw said and Root banged her head back against the wall. “And I know you’ve been having a hard time lately, but I also have been struggling with something and I talked to _her_ about it because I didn’t know how to breach it with you”

Root raised an eyebrow. “You cheated on me.”

“I didn’t fucking cheat on you” Shaw said loudly and in Root’s face. “If anything it’s the opposite, I’m having some weird kind of feelings phobia”

Root raised an eyebrow.

“What?”

“You know it’s not normal right,” Shaw said “that I care about you so much, and say all that shi that makes you doe eyed and melty”

Root stared at her confused.

“What would happen if that went away one day?” Shaw asked and moved her arm off Root’s chest, slamming her palm against the wall in frustration over the matter.

“That’s what this is about?” Root asked and Shaw just stared at her.

“Yeah” she said blankly.

Root sighed. “Sam”

“No I’m serious” Shaw said.

“Why are you saying this?” Root asked “Have you… have you stopped feeling that way?”

“No, no no no” Shaw said the words tumbling from her tongue. “I’m just…”

“Scared?”

“It’s bothering me” Shaw said with a shrug and Root leaned back against the wall and looked at Shaw.

“You’re cute” was all Root said and Shaw frowned.

“That’s not exactly…”

“You realise I _liked_ you before you were all gooey around me right?” Root said. “I’ve had a thing for you since we met, since you asked me if I was okay that one time then bought me a drink… Sam, that hasn’t changed, and it won’t change even if you do”

“But what if one day I just go back to being-”

“Cold?” Root finished “Sameen, I just don’t think that’s possible, you’re not an elastic band, you’re not just going to be pulled until you snap back, you’re a person and people are complicated.”

Shaw frowned. “What if one day I stop loving you?”

Shaw saw the look on Root’s face flicker at the thought, before she caught herself and recomposed.

“Then we’ll deal with it” Root said standing up off the wall and slipping her arms around Shaw’s waist.

“That’s it?” Shaw asked.

“That’s it.” Root said “You were good to me before we got married, before you even knew me that well, I’m not worried.”

Shaw frowned. Root was right. She had always had a soft patch for Root. Always.

Shaw let out a loud sigh. “It’s been stressing me out.”

Root just smiled “can you make it sound less ominous next time you’re gonna tell me about your cute little anxieties”

Shaw rolled her eyes. “They’re not cute.”

“They’re kinda cute” Root smirked. “Worried about your love for me dying.”

“Okay that’s not what I said” Shaw glared at her and Root grinned.

“Sameen we are bound by the universe” Root said dramatically pulling Shaw tighter and Shaw groaned in protest. “We’re destined for each other, I’ll love you forever.”

“You’re being an idiot, and also diminishing my worries to a joke” Shaw pouted and Root just looked at her with a smile.

“Sam does it _feel_ like we’re gonna be getting rid of each other any time soon?” Root asked.

“Annoyingly, no” Shaw said with an almost smile, it was true. She could feel Root in her bones, in her blood. Like they were stuck together, for life. “But you’re still an ass.”

“And you’re a cute ass” Root smirked and slipped her hands around grabbing two handfuls of Shaw’s ass and squeezing it lightly. Shaw rolled her eyes.

“I can’t believe you head butted me” Shaw said shaking her head.

“You set that up yourself” Root pointed out and Shaw frowned.

“You didn’t even give me a chance to say anything before you leapt to your shitty conclusions” Shaw said.

“What did you expect?” Root shrugged.

“Not physical abuse” Shaw said “But dually noted.”

Root smirked. “You’re lucky I wasn’t armed.”

“Or what, you would have shot my other shoulder?” Shaw asked and rotated her wounded shoulder a little, the pain finally easing.

“I’m sorry about that” Root said with a apologetic pout as she looked at Shaw’s bandaged shoulder.

“You should be” Shaw glared at her “I think you popped the stitches”

“Baby” Root said and stuck her bottom lip out. Shaw rolled her eyes and moved away from Root letting out another deep exhale. That hadn’t completely eased her mind, but knowing that Root had such a deep rooted faith in their relationship these days definitely eased the tension she had been carrying about it. It annoyed her that it made her feel so much better hearing something she could just tell herself but from Root instead. There was a difference. A big difference. It was just comforting when Root said it.

“Wanna finish what we barely started?” Root asked quirking an eyebrow and Shaw just rolled her eyes.

“No” Shaw said. “Let’s go out.”

Root lifted an eyebrow.

*

“I have a _fucking_ headache” Root complained as they walked down the street, both hands pressed firmly against her forehead in exasperation. Shaw rolled her eyes.

“Your fault” she murmured and Root glared at her.

“Is it bruising?” Root asked moving her hands out of the way and Shaw inspected her forehead.

“No but your pale ass skin now has a red mark” Shaw smirked.

“Rude” Root frowned. “Where are we going?”

“Shut up” Shaw said. “You’re so impatient.”

Root sighed dramatically and held Shaw’s hand as they walked down the road.

“So you saw Zoe this morning?” Root piped up and Shaw just nodded.

“She came for a run with Bear and I” Shaw said.

“Really?” Root asked a twang of jealousy in her voice.

“She was asking about John’s birthday” Shaw smirked.

“He ages?” Root asked “I assumed he was a tan vampire”

Shaw laughed.

“Are you gonna get him something?” Root asked.

“I don’t know” Shaw shrugged “Maybe a grenade launcher”

“Mayhem twins” Root muttered under her breath and Shaw pulled her into a coffee shop.

“I might have also agreed to a double date” Shaw added and Root’s eyes immediately lit up.

“You did?”

Shaw smirked. “I figured one dinner with them couldn’t do any harm.”

“Sameen” Root practically squealed then quickly stopped and frowned. Shaw lifted an eyebrow watching Root’s expression change.

“What?”

“A double date” Root said and Shaw nodded in confirmation. “But _we_ hardly go on dates ourselves.”

“That’s because we’re _married_ ” Shaw smirked and Root rolled her eyes.

“I meant with each other” Root said and frowned again. Shaw rolled her eye and stepped up to the counter to order.

“Two lattes” she said to the barista “One soy, two sugars” she said Root’s order coming out of her mouth without a single thought. Root stared at her, it suddenly hitting her how well Shaw knew her. All the tiny details. Shaw noticed.

“Can you wait here?” Shaw asked turning back to Root. “I’m gonna go to the bathroom.”

Root just shrugged and stuffed her hands into her jacket pockets as she waited. Thinking about this double date Shaw signed them up for, and then wondering if maybe she should start initiating more dates. She thought about all the things they could do together and almost smiled at the thought of dragging Shaw to various museums and watching her pretend to be interested until she couldn’t anymore.

“Two lattes for Sam” the barista called out sliding two take out coffee cups onto the bench. Root glanced around but didn’t see Shaw, so she picked up the coffees and went to wait outside. Pushing open the door with her hip she quickly stopped seeing someone in her way, but when she looked up she saw Shaw. Standing outside, holding flowers.

Root’s mouth fell open.

“What are…” the words barely made it out of her mouth. Shaw smiled and exchanged her coffee in Root’s hand for the flowers.

Root stared at her in shock, a smile spreading across her face as she looked at the colourful yellows and pinks of the flowers before looking back at Shaw again.

“Did I just find a new way to make you shut up?” Shaw asked with a smirk and Root was still staring at her baffled.

“No I just…” Root started and looked back at the flowers with a smile, feeling her heart fluttering happily in her chest.

“You just?” Shaw grinned and Root looked up at her.

“Thank you” Root said softly and Shaw gave a nonchalant shrug as they began to walk along the sidewalk.

“Coffee and flowers” Root said unable to get rid of the smile on her face. “I think I’m in love.”

“You think?” Shaw smirked and Root looked at her a twinkle in her eyes.

“I guess we do go on dates” Root said with a smile.

“Just not conventional ones” Shaw said “Because we’d end up murdering.”

“I have more self control than you do” Root said and Shaw rolled her eyes.

“Barely, psychopath”

“Sociopath” Root shot back and they turned to each other and smirked.

“I love you” Shaw said. “It’s annoying.”

Root grinned. “I never told you what my favourite flowers were, but somehow you got it right anyway.”

“Yeah because I’m Wife of the Year” Shaw smirked and Root leaned over and quickly kissed her cheek before she could pull away.

“You know what’s annoying, Sameen?” Root said and Shaw looked at her taking a sip from her coffee. “Every time I think I can’t fall in love with you any damn more, you go and do something like this.”

Shaw smirked proudly and Root just stared at her.

“Don’t feel too pleased with yourself though” Root said smelling her flowers “because I bet you’ve forgotten Valentines Day is coming up, and oh baby you might be wife of the year now, but just you wait”

Shaw stared at her and shook her head. “No way, we’re not doing Valentines Day”

“Yes we fucking are, Sameen” Root said firmly and Shaw rolled her eyes.

“Root”

“Don’t argue” Root said “Valentines Day is goddamn happening.”

Shaw smirked. “Actually I was just gonna say, oh _it’s on._ ”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> for those of you that get annoyed that everything doesn't go smoothly between these two all the time... lmao welcome to life.
> 
> but yay valentines day is coming up ;) 
> 
> thoughts? feels?
> 
> x


	63. Out Wifed

When Shaw woke up the next morning Root wasn’t in bed next to her. The bathroom door was pulled closed, she assumed Root was in there. Coffee, she thought pulling on a t-shirt and wandering downstairs to make them both coffee and then bring it back up. Lazy morning in bed, she thought. That would be fucking fantastic. But as she walked into the kitchen she found herself looking straight at Root who was midst pouring coffee into two mugs. Shaw stopped dead in her tracks, glancing at the coffee then at Root, and raised an eyebrow.

“Bet me to it” Shaw said and tilted her head to the side, Root just smirked and pushed one of the mugs towards Shaw.

“I’ll make breakfast too” Root said “But coffee first.”

“I’ll take Bear out” Shaw said taking a sip of coffee.

“I’ve done it already” Root said and nodded at Bear who was fast asleep on his bed. Shaw stared at the dog and then looked slowly back at Root.

“You took the dog out?” Shaw clarified.

“Mhm” Root smiled and Shaw raised an eyebrow. She suddenly realised what Root was doing. Valentines Day was coming up. And the competitive wife behaviour had slowly been coming to life for the past couple of days. Getting the door for each other first, making dinner plans, even down to cute kisses. And now this.

“Thanks,” Shaw said. “I’m surprised you’re not covered in mud or something, he’s pretty strong”

“I can handle our dog, Sam” Root said. _Our_ dog. Shaw glanced at Bear.

“Did you drug him?” she asked. “He’s never that tired after I take him.”

Root just smirked. “You think I would do that to our baby?”

Shaw just rolled her eyes and Root came around to her side of the counter, putting her mug down on the counter and grabbing Shaw by the hips, pulling her closer.

“Good morning” she said with a small smile and Shaw just looked at her, still holding her mug between them. She wasn’t gonna win this easily.

“Shouldn’t you have started with that?” Shaw smirked and Root just ran her hands around Shaw’s hips to her ass, her t-shirt hitching up with Root’s hands.

“No” Root said “You prefer coffee before interaction.”

Shaw just stared at her, she looked so smug. Root leaned into kiss Shaw, but Shaw quickly turned her face so Root missed and kissed her cheek instead. Immediately pulling back with a pout.

“Hey” she protested “What was that for?”

Shaw lifted her mug up to her lips and took another sip of coffee, glancing at Root with a smirk.

“I know what you’re doing” Shaw said. “It doesn’t count if you’re just trying to win.”

Before Root could answer Shaw leaned in and kissed Root lightly on the mouth, then pulled away from her, moving around to the fridge.

“Not that I don’t appreciate being groped as I drink my coffee” Shaw added glancing over her shoulder at Root and winking. Root stared at her, lips parted in mild shock she’d been found out so easily.

“Does this mean I’m a bad wife?” Root asked as Shaw threw some bread in the toaster.

“Why would you say that?” Shaw asked cracking eggs into the pan. Root just watched her.

“If you can so easily tell that I’m doing this because of our conversation, not because I love you” Root said and Shaw looked at her.

“You don’t love me?” Shaw feigned shock and Root rolled her eyes, coming over to Shaw and pushing her out of the way.

“I said I was doing breakfast” Root said.

“You were taking too long” Shaw said and swatted Root’s hands away from the pan. Root fought against her and they ended up grabbing each others hands and looking at one another.

“Stop” Shaw said but couldn’t stop the smile on her face. Root just looked at her.

“You’ve made me worried” Root said and Shaw let go of her hands.

“You’re not a bad wife, Root” Shaw said. “I can just tell when you’re being competitive.”

Root took a step back and folded her arms with a pout.

“And you’re not being competitive right now?” Root asked. Shaw looked at the pan.

“Nope.” she said.

“I have an idea” Root said. “Let’s make each other breakfast.”

Shaw rolled her eyes and looked at Root.

“And that’s not being competitive how?”

“It’s not competitive Sameen,” Root said innocently “It’s cute.”

Shaw knew she couldn’t stop her.

“Fine” she agreed. “But it’s not a competition.”

“Worried?” Root asked pulling open the fridge and Shaw just rolled her eyes.

“No.”

*

“I think if I pass out from hunger that means you lose” Shaw said drumming her fingers on the counter.

“I thought you said this wasn’t a competition, Sam” Root said glancing over at her as she put the finishing touches on Shaw’s breakfast. Shaw rolled her eyes.

“Hurry up” Shaw said and Root smirked.

“You’re so impatient.”

Root slid the plate across the counter towards Shaw and she looked at it.

“This looks like art, not food” Shaw said immediately and Root smirked stabbing a fork into her sunny side up eggs that Shaw had made. Yolk running over the piece of toast.

“That’s offensive” Shaw said watching Root, before glancing back at the artistically decorated bagel that Root had presented her with.

“Just try it” Root said and Shaw pushed the cutlery aside, picking it up with her fingers and staring at it closely before taking a bite. A moan was emitted from her mouth before she could stop it. Fuck it was good. She had no clue what Root had done. But fuck.

“Seriously?” Shaw said through a mouthful. “Why are you good at everything?”

Root rolled her eyes. “I’m not.”

“I beg to differ” Shaw said.

“You’re a better wife than me” Root shrugged and Shaw just looked at her.

“No I’m not.” Shaw huffed.

“You are.” Root said determinedly.

“What would make you say that?” Shaw asked. “Actually don’t answer that, instead consider this, how many times I’ve walked out compared to you.”

Root rolled her eyes. “That’s not fair.”

“It’s a valid point” Shaw said. “Weirdly enough you’re a more sane wife than me.”

Root shook her head.

“Are we going to argue about this?” Shaw asked and Root smirked.

“You’d have to admit I’m right eventually” Root said and Shaw smirked.

“Not a chance” Shaw said “but I can think of so many other things we could be doing instead”

“Yeah” Root said “like that dinner tonight with Zoe and John”

Shaw rolled her eyes.

“Shit,” she muttered as she wiped food from the corners of her mouth. “I forgot about that.”

“What are you gonna wear?” Root asked and Shaw looked at her slowly.

“Did you seriously just ask me that?” Shaw said with a deadpan expression and Root laughed.

“We have to look better than them” Root said and Shaw just stared at her.

“Is that a competition now too?” Shaw asked getting up to put their breakfast dishes into the washer.

“Noo” Root grinned as Shaw glanced at her expression as she walked past.

“So if I say race you upstairs?” Shaw asked and glanced at Root. They looked at each other for a split second, holding eye contact. Before Root suddenly launched from her seat and practically pushed Shaw out of the way as she bolted for the stairs. Shaw smirked and ran after Root, grabbing her by her t-shirt and trying to yank her back. Root held onto the bannister of the stairs refusing to let Shaw get in front. She pulled herself forward whacking Shaw’s hands away from her as she powered up the stairs, taking two at a time with her long legs. Shaw raced behind her trying to figure out how to get around her, still trying to grab her and tackle her out of the way, but Root was fast, she ran into their bedroom just as Shaw caught her. Trapping her and pushing her down onto the bed, landing on top of her with a soft thud. Root laughed and then gasped for air, her arms instinctively wrapping around Shaw’s body that was now on top of hers.

Shaw looked down at her with a smirk.

“So, not at all competitive then” Shaw said and kissed the end of Root’s nose as she giggled.

“You said it” Root said running her fingers over Shaw’s back. “And you chased me.”

“You’re very chasable” Shaw smirked and Root just looked at her. Pink cheeks, smiling, that damn sparkle in her eyes.

“You look happy” Shaw added studying her closely. Root chewed on her lip.

“I mean how can I not be, I have my super amazing wife on top of me” Root said and Shaw rolled her eyes.

“I’m serious” Shaw said.

Root looked at her, reaching up and touching Shaw’s face lightly. Brushing the fallen strands of hair behind Shaw’s ears.

“You’re pretty” was all Root said.

“And you’re competitive” Shaw smirked. “I’m considering drawing out of this valentines day competition because I’m genuinely scared.”

Root just laughed. “I’m not that crazy!”

Shaw arched an eyebrow “you just turned breakfast into an episode of Master Chef”

“There was nowhere near that volume of yelling” Root protested and Shaw grinned as she climbed off Root and started getting dressed.

“Should I tell you what I’m gonna wear so that you can look better than me?” Shaw asked glancing over at Root who was still lounging on the bed watching Shaw.

Root had an entertained look on her face.

“Wow you’re _so_ funny” Root said with a smirk as she rolled onto her stomach and buried her head back into the pillows. Shaw pulled on a shirt and then looked at Root. Her t-shirt had ridden halfway up her back, and she was in nothing else except black lacy underwear. Shaw smirked to herself and climbed onto the bed leaning over and kissing Root on the ass.

Root smiled into the pillows and Shaw caught it. Leaning down again and lightly sinking her teeth into her ass.

Root squealed and immediately rolled back over.

“Do you want to have sex?” Root asked and Shaw raised an eyebrow.

“Don’t we have things to do today?” Shaw asked.

“We have a dinner” Root shrugged “as for the rest of the day…”

“Work is still a thing you know” Shaw smirked and Root’s face automatically fell a little, The Machine still wasn’t talking to her. But she was getting used to it now. It had been the longest out of all the times previously. They both knew it was hard with Samaritan, but it was hardest for Root.

“Sex sounds better” Root said and Shaw pulled Root’s arms so she was sitting up.

“Why don’t you come with me to Finch’s?” Shaw asked and Root just stared at her.

“Can I stay here?”

“By yourself?” Shaw asked, kind of hoping that Root would want to come with her.

“I have Bear” Root pointed out and Shaw sighed.

*

Root was still lounging around reading a Jane Austen novel when she heard her phone start buzzing. She hadn’t bothered to move too far today. She knew Shaw would be home soon, and she couldn’t deny the fact she still didn’t know what to do with herself now that The Machine was being so silent. Not getting any messages to her at all. She didn’t know whether The Machine was giving her space and time to settle. Or whether it was something bigger than that. Either way she was slowly adjusting.

Root scrambled off the couch and picked up her phone, it was an unknown caller, but the number looked somewhat familiar.

“Yeah?” Root answered, there was a pause before a woman started speaking.

“Is this Samantha Groves?” the woman said and Root was immediately thrown by the use of her legal name. This couldn’t be good.

“I’m calling on behalf of Sameen Shaw” the woman said. Root’s heart almost stopped beating entirely.

“What happened?” Root asked barely able to breathe.

“You were listed as her emergency contact Samantha” the woman said “I understand that you’re married, is that correct?”

“That’s correct, what happened, is she okay?” Root was standing up, pacing the living room.

“She was in an accident Samantha” the woman said.

“What kind of accident?” Root practically yelled down the phone. “Will she be okay?”

“Samantha, take a breath” the woman said her voice annoyingly calm and level. “Sameen will be fine, in fact she didn’t even want to be admitted, she fought the medics on the scene of the crash.”

Suddenly Root felt a wave of relief rushing through her body. She could breathe. It was as if a hundred pound weight was lifted off her chest.

“Can I talk to her?” Root asked pulling on her jacket and grabbing the keys and helmet for her bike.

“We dosed her up on morphine, Samantha” the woman said “and she’s finally asleep.”

“I’m on my way” Root said “Don’t let her leave if she wakes up, even if she wants to.”

*

Root sped all the way to the hospital Shaw was at. She still had a lingering feeling of weight crushing her chest, stopping her from breathing normally at the mere thought of Shaw being injured. Being in hospital, being in an accident while she was obliviously at home reading. This is what normal felt like. She felt a deep frustration bubbling at The Machine. She glared at one of the cameras as she stormed into the building.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” she growled at Her.“I know you’re there.”

She burst into reception and slammed her helmet onto the desk causing the nurses to jump in fright, suddenly seeing a disheveled woman with a tinted black helmet and leather.

“Where’s my wife?” Root asked. “Sameen Shaw.”

“Mrs Groves?” A woman appeared in the white doctors coat. “We spoke on the phone, I’m Melissa, Sameen’s doctor.”

Melissa was already walking, Root swiped her helmet off the desk and followed after her.

“She’s woken up, and tried to leave” Melissa said checking something on her clipboard as she led Root down the hallway before glancing back at her. “Twice.”

Root couldn’t help but smirk.

“Can’t keep that firecracker down” Root said and Melissa rolled her eyes.

“Apparently not.” she said stopping outside a door. “She’s in here.”

“Thank you” Root said with a genuine smile before she entered the room.

Shaw was on the hospital bed, in one of those ridiculous paper gowns. She had an IV drip stuck in her arm and was staring at the ceiling with an angry expression on her face.

“Hey baby” Root said tossing her helmet onto the nearest chair and going straight over to Shaw. Shaw looked at her and then stared back at the ceiling.

“Are you okay?” Root asked giving Shaw a once over seeing if she could see any visible damage. Shaw had a bandage on her wrist and hand, and a bruise across her collarbone, with a couple of tiny scratches around her left eye but that was all Root could see. On a Shaw scale, that wouldn’t even deem her worthy of going near a hospital.

“No” Shaw answered sharply. “You better be here to take me away.”

“That’s not up to me Sam” Root said and sat on the edge of the bed. Shaw looked at her.

“Can’t you pretend to be a doctor or something?” she asked.

“Not with Her” Root shrugged. “Also why I’m late.”

“Did you piss her off or something, because this is really inconvenient”

Root smiled a little.

“I’m glad you’re okay” Root said changing the subject. “What happened?”

Shaw just rolled her eyes.

“Some asshole T boned me.”

“How’s your neck?” Root asked and Shaw just looked at her.

“Not bad enough for me to be trapped here” Shaw said and Root just smirked, before glancing at the door behind them making sure it was definitely shut, as were the blinds to the window beside the door, and then climbing onto Shaw’s bed, straddling her legs. The hospital bed creaked underneath them and Shaw stared at her with wide eyes.

“What are you doing?” she asked reaching out for Root to make sure she wasn’t going to fall or break the bed. Root just grinned leaning down onto Shaw, pushing her hair out of the way and pressing her lips to Shaw’s neck gently.

“Root” Shaw said quietly, it was meant to be a protest but it came out the complete opposite. Root kept kissing her neck softly, running her lips over Shaw’s skin, light as a feather. Shaw could feel Root’s warm breath against her skin, she could smell the sweet scent of her hair. She loved feeling the weight of Root on top of her.

“You know” Root said nestling calmly into the crook of Shaw’s neck, it was warm and it smelt like home. “I freaked out when they called me and told me you were here.”

“I’m sorry” Shaw said her hands slipping around Root’s sides. “I don’t even need to be here.”

“I know” Root said “but it still scared me.”

“Are you okay?” Shaw asked. They both felt entirely at ease, being so close to each other. Touching. Being able to feel each other, smell each other. Hear each other breathing. It was home.

“Yeah, but I think I ran at least four red lights” Root said with a small smile and Shaw kissed the side of her head.

“I would’ve done the same” she said.

“It felt like I couldn’t breathe” Root said “and then she said you were trying to escape.”

“Reassuring?” Shaw asked and Root grinned.

“You’re an idiot.”

“Can you break me out?” Shaw asked “I barely sprained my wrist.”

“I don’t know this paper gown is kinda sexy” Root smirked moving her hands between their bodies and over Shaw’s chest. “I can feel _everything._ ”

Before Shaw could reply they were interrupted by the sound of the door opening to Shaw’s room.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> YES this is real life... i did update ;) so damn sorry it took so long, life was a little hectic lately! ENJOY! Let me know what you think as always! thank you for being so patient and your ongoing support, means the world, you're all amazing!
> 
> ...they're cute when they're competitive, but also, fucking hell Sameen, way to give Root heart failure.


	64. Interrupted

The nurse who walked into the room came to an abrupt halt when she saw Root on top of Shaw on the hospital bed. Her mouth fell open and she immediately went to walk back out the door before she turned and came back in. Root glanced at her over her shoulder and Shaw just rolled her eyes at Root, who wasn’t showing any signs of getting off Shaw in the next few moments. The nurse stared at them looking utterly confused and startled and then went to leave again.

“Root” Shaw mumbled from underneath her. “Get off me.”

Root glanced at Shaw and then back at the nurse, realising what this must’ve looked like and she slid off Shaw’s legs.

“She had an itch” Root said with a shrug and the nurse just nodded.

“Yeah, of course” she muttered as she came over to Shaw’s bed and grabbed the clipboard, quickly immersing herself in Shaw’s charts.

“I’m fine” Shaw summarised for her “Can I go now?”

The nurse glanced up and looked at Shaw, then over at Root who was looking at her with a tilted head. The nurse flushed pink and looked back at the clipboard.

“Yeah you should be…” she said quietly “that’s fine.”

Shaw glanced at Root and then looked back at the nurse, who hung the clipboard back on the end of the bed and then hurried for the door.

“I’ll get the doctor to sign off on your release” she said as the door shut behind her.

Root looked at Shaw with a smirk.

“You’re such a brat” Shaw rolled her eyes and Root kept smirking. “Get off my bed.”

“No” Root said staying firmly where she was sitting.

“Will you at least grab my clothes then?” Shaw asked and pointed at her stuff which had been folded and placed on the chair.

Root sighed and got up, grabbing Shaw’s clothes. Shaw slowly pulled herself out of the bed. Her head thumping a little as she moved. Shaw pulled off the stupid paper gown and let it drop to the fall. As Root turned around she stopped immediately seeing Shaw’s practically naked body.

“I really hate those things” Shaw said kicking the gown with her foot and snatching her clothes from Root.

“You look much better like that” Root said and quirked an eyebrow as Shaw glared at her.

“You look much better with your mouth shut” Shaw said. Root’s teeth sank down on her lower lip as she looked at Shaw.

“You’re kinda turning me on” Root said and Shaw pulled her jeans on.

“You’d get off to the image of me taking the trash out, I don’t flatter myself” Shaw said and Root just moved closer to her.

“It’s not my fault you look good all the time” Root said and Shaw just watched her moving closer.

“Are you trying to have sex with me in a hospital room?” Shaw asked and Root’s lips caught hers before she could answer.

“Maybe” Root murmured, and suddenly the door opened behind them again.

“Ah, ladies” it was Melissa’s voice. Root moved away from Shaw faster this time, but as she turned to face the doctor forgot Shaw was still topless. Melissa arched an eyebrow and Shaw just rolled her eyes. Again.

“If I can’t leave, I’m leaving” Shaw said and Melissa just smirked as Shaw aggressively tugged her shirt on. It was ripped up the arm from the crash. Thankfully she hadn’t been driving her Ferrari.

“Sameen you’re good to go” Melissa said “I just need a signature here” she said and held out the clipboard. Shaw stepped past Root and signed the piece of paper before dropping the pen on the clipboard and looking at Root.

“You better have that other helmet” Shaw said and Root glanced at the doctor.

“Really?” Melissa asked and Root just grinned as she picked up her helmet and tossed it to Shaw. “You better not be back here later, you’re a terrible patient” Melissa said with a smile as Shaw bolted from the room.

“Don’t take it personally, she used to be a doctor” Root said to her as she left.

“Oh the clarity” Melissa said “have a …safe afternoon”

Root just smirked.

*****

_A few hours later…_

 

“We do not have to go to this dinner Sam” Root insisted as Shaw lay half dressed on the bedroom floor.

“No, I said we would” Shaw grumbled and Root walked out of the bathroom, almost tripping over her, before looking down and putting her hands on her hips.

“You were just discharged from hospital, I think that counts as a decent enough excuse” Root said.

“I’m not even injured” Shaw complained. “I could have bandaged my wrist myself if it had even been that bad.”

“But if we stay here,” Root said slowly “then we could take off all our clothes and lay in bed”

Shaw sighed and stared up at Root.

“I don’t want to give Zoe any reason for murderous thoughts” Shaw said.

“She will understand if we don’t go, Sameen” Root said and crouched over the top of Shaw’s body. “How are you feeling?”

“Fine” Shaw said, she was trying to sound snappy but she mostly sounded tired and mildly annoyed still.

“Fine means pleasing, or very well” Root said looking down at her wife. “Are you very well?”

“Well I’m not injured” Shaw said “so yes, I’m fine… ish”

Root raised an eyebrow. “Why ish?”

Shaw studied Root’s face for a moment before sitting up, narrowly avoiding another headbutt as she moved away from Root and pulled herself to her feet.

“Come on” Shaw said and stuck out her hand. “We have a double date.”

Root just frowned and looked at her from where she was sitting on the ground.

“I’m not getting up until you tell me why _ish_ ”

“Root” Shaw whinged, “It’s nothing.”

“If it’s nothing you wouldn’t have said it” Root said and stared at Shaw waiting for an answer. Shaw just sighed and glanced at Root.

“I feel like, a little bit weird, but it’s nothing” Shaw said with a shrug of nonchalance. Root got to her feet immediately and closely examined Shaw’s face.

“Weird how?” Root asked.

“Don’t fuss” Shaw said pushing Root’s hands away before she could touch her. “I’m okay.”

“Then why do you feel weird?” Root asked and Shaw just sighed and looked down between them.

“Because I was in a car crash” Shaw said bluntly and Root rolled her eyes.

“I thought you said it wasn’t that bad, Sameen” Root said, “tell me what happened.”

“I was reaching for my gun, the asshole t-boned me and my wrist got stuck, then the airbag’s decided to deploy” Shaw said with a shrug and Root just frowned.

“The airbag hit you?” Root asked “like in the head?”

“Yeah Root” Shaw said “It hit me.”

Root immediately moved towards Shaw, taking her face in her hands and inspecting her closely.

“Stop it” Shaw protested but didn’t make a move to swat away Root’s hands.

“Do you feel dizzy?” Root asked.

“No.”

“Are you nauseous?”

“ _No_ ”

“Do you have a headache?”

Silence.

“Sam, do you have a headache?”

“Kind of” Shaw said with a frown. Root sighed. “I was a doctor, Root, I know what concussion symptoms look like.”

Root looked at Shaw directly in the eyes, a small frown creased her forehead as she studied Shaw closely.

“I don’t think we should go tonight” Root insisted and Shaw just shook her head.

“We’re going.” Shaw said. They looked at each other for a few more moments, Root realised there was probably no convincing Shaw otherwise, she let out a soft sigh and wrapped her arms around Shaw’s body, pulling them together.

Shaw let Root hug her, she didn’t even protest these days. She would never admit that maybe it actually kind of potentially felt nice, but she might not violently deny it. She draped her arms around Root’s neck and let Root hold them close together, until they could feel each other breathing against the other.

“You have to tell me if it gets worse” Root said quietly against Shaw’s ear.

“It’s not going to” Shaw insisted.

“Okay, but if it does…” Root said and Shaw pulled back a little so she could look at her wife.

“You’ll be the first to know” Shaw said.

*

When they finally turned up at dinner Reese almost looked relieved to see Shaw, until he noticed the bandage on her hand, and scrapes on her face.

“What happened to you?” he asked and Shaw just rolled her eyes.

“Car crash” she muttered really not wanting to talk about it.

“Not the Ferrari?” Reese almost looked pained.

“No” Shaw said “Or I’d be in mourning.”

Zoe hugged Root hello and then they took their seats at the table. Annoyingly Root chose to sit opposite Shaw as opposed to beside her and so she was stuck next to Reese. She didn’t know why that tiny little thing bothered her as if the other side of the table was too far away for her liking. On the plus side her direct line of sight was Root. So it wasn’t so bad.

They ordered food. They ordered alcohol. They talked. They laughed. Shaw tried not to kill Reese and his stupid jokes. Zoe and Root got along like they had been raised together. It was weird how much Root almost looked up to Zoe. Like an older sister or something.

She could feel Root watching her from time to time, silently checking that she was still okay. She thought about the last dinner that they had gone to at their neighbours, then she thought about how persistent Root had been tonight that they didn’t have to go if Shaw didn’t want to. She almost smiled at the thought. _Fuck_ they’d come a long way.

“So tell me” Zoe said and glanced over at Shaw “How often do you have sex now that you’re married?”

Shaw felt Reese tense up beside her and she smirked, then glanced over at Root who had an eyebrow raised.

“A lot of people say marriage kills sex” Zoe added and Root chewed her bottom lip. They were several drinks in now, so everyone was a lot less tense. Except Reese.

“I guess it depends who you marry” Root said with a smirk and glanced at Shaw.

“Touche” Zoe said and took a sip from her wine, but glanced at Shaw as she did.

“What?” Shaw asked and Zoe smirked.

“You’re being awfully quiet on the matter”

“If I open my mouth I’ll traumatise John” Shaw said and then added “on second thoughts…”

“The nurse walked in when I was on top of Sam” Root said with a smirk “and then the doctor came in when she was shirtless, then we had sex in the shower when we got home”

Zoe arched an eyebrow in surprise and Reese just shook his head.

“Does that answer the question?” Root smirked and Shaw just stared at her.

“We had sex yesterday too” Shaw added.

“Oh and the day before when you bought me flowers” Root grinned and Zoe immediately looked at Shaw.

“You bought her flowers?” Zoe asked with a smirk and Shaw rolled her eyes.

“Flowers?” Reese added “Really? you?”

“She’s more of a sap than you’d think” Root said and suddenly Shaw felt Root’s foot between her legs under the table.

“Gross” Reese muttered.

Shaw tried to push Root’s foot away from her crotch but failed. She stared at Root across the table. Root took a sip from her wine as she pushed her foot against Shaw’s crotch a little harder. Shaw made the mistake of moving against her foot, mostly trying to shuffle back in her seat, but it allowed Root to catch her right in the spot. She let out a small breath and quickly covered it over with a cough, that almost went unnoticed.

“So Shaw, what’s your favourite thing about _marriage_ ” Reese asked glancing at Shaw and then down at her lap for a split second. Shaw glared at him.

“It’s definitely when Root eats my leftovers” Shaw said sarcastically and Reese smirked.

“Really Sam?” Root asked propping elbows up on the table and resting her chin on her hands looking at Shaw. “Tell me more” she said and it didn’t go unnoticed to Shaw that Root’s tongue was slowly running tracing her teeth. Shaw tore her eyes away from Root, there was no way she was going to let Root do that to her here. She knew what she was trying to do. And there was no way in hell it was happening. Not unless she got to Root first.

Shaw looked straight at Root. “Well I also love it when you piss me off so much I have to go to the gym and burn off some energy, let out some of that tension you so easily build up inside me” Shaw said trying not to let the smirk on the corners of her mouth show. She knew Root always got kinda hot when Shaw came back from the gym. She didn’t know what it was, she was always sweaty and sticky but for some reason Root dug it.

She watched the look on Root’s face change as she realised what Shaw was doing.

“What about when you take all the covers?” Root shot back “and leave me there, completely exposed.”

Shaw felt her jaw twitch, and Root’s foot move closer into her crotch again.

“You always take my clothes and put them on when I’m in the shower” Shaw said “and I have to go through the house to get more”

They stared at each other for a few seconds and Zoe smirked at them.

“Thriving” Zoe said and Shaw snapped her attention away from Root.

“I’m only in it for the sex” Shaw said deadpan and felt Root still looking at her. “And the carrot soup.”

“What about the dog?” Root asked.

“Dog’s mine” Shaw said immediately and watched Root slip on her hands under the table. _No way_ she thought. She wouldn’t.

“I’m going to the ladies” Zoe said excusing herself as she got up. Shaw caught the look she gave Reese and smirked a little.

“Well that’s not obvious, or disgusting at all” Shaw said loudly as Reese got up a few seconds later claiming he was going to get the bill.

Root just stared at her from across the table.

“Shouldn’t we be the ones going to the bathroom?” Root asked and getting up from her seat and moving around the table to sit beside Shaw.

“You seem to be enjoying yourself enough under the table” Shaw said with a slight smirk and Root just leaned over and kissed her lightly.

“Maybe we should do double dates more often” she said and Shaw rolled her eyes.

“If you’re just looking for excuses to have sex in public places…” Shaw said.

“Shut up” Root said her hand slipping onto Shaw’s thigh as she kissed the corner of Shaw’s mouth.

“You’ve had a lot of wine” Shaw said with a smirk tasting it on Root’s lips.

“So?” Root grinned.

“You get less accurate” Shaw smirked and Root raised an eyebrow, then felt Shaw’s hand grab hers and move it a little closer between her legs. Root looked at her, their faces were close. She could feel Shaw’s breath on her face.

“You wouldn’t let me” Root said and lightly poked her middle finger between Shaw’s legs.

Shaw just looked at her. Their eyes were locked on each other. For a moment it felt like all they needed. Like everything else around them fell away.

“Do you want me, Sam?” Root said the words came off her lips as a sticky whisper.

But just as Shaw went to answer Root glanced to the side and then got to her feet. Shaw stared at her with a frown, tempted to reach out and grab her hand and stop her from leaving.

Root stopped behind Shaw’s chair, she ran her fingers through Shaw’s hair as Reese and Zoe came back to the table.

“That was quick” Root said with a sly smirk, then took a handle of Shaw’s hair, yanking her head backwards and then planting a soft kiss on Shaw’s lips, before taking her seat again.

“Anyone for dessert?” Root asked looking straight at Shaw.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Root is so cute uGH.  
> Literally makes me emotional how far these two idiots have come in this marriage <3333333
> 
> SO I'm holding another consensus due to getting several suggestions that I should incorporate the canon storyline of Shaw getting taken by Samaritan and Root looking for her etc etc... currently tossing up with this still, but, please let me know below whether you yay or nay that idea.... 
> 
> ...the floor is yours 
> 
> xx


	65. Touch

“Is it bad if I admit they’re actually quite cute together?” Root asked as they walked home after the dinner with Reese and Zoe.

“She makes him happy” Shaw said “It’s good.”

“We still win because we’re married though” Root added and Shaw turned to her with an amused smile playing on her face.

“We _win_?” she asked “because everything’s a competition right?”

Shaw grabbed Root’s hands as they walked and Root laughed as she bumped into Shaw. Their bodies close. She stopped moving and looked at her.

“I would race you home but you have a concussion” Root said and kissed the end of Shaw’s nose, and she scrunched it up in protest.

“I do not have a concussion” Shaw said.

“You do” Root nodded.

“You shouldn’t race me home anyway” Shaw said “for the main purpose, I go running and you don’t.”

“I can see how that might not work in my favour” Root giggled and Shaw just rolled her eyes.

“Why do I let you near alcohol?” Shaw muttered to herself and Root just grinned.

“Because I touch you a lot when I drink” Root said and Shaw glanced at her.

“You touch me a lot anyway” Shaw said and Root just laced their fingers together. Shaw glanced down at their hands, considering protesting but realising she probably wouldn’t win. Her head still felt a little strange too, so having Root that close was nice.

“Are you okay?” Root asked her as they started to walk. Shaw could feel those warm brown eyes watching her even through the street lights.

“Seriously” Shaw said “yes.”

“You had like one drink tonight” Root pointed out “I noticed.”

“Very perceptive, Sherlock Holmes” Shaw smirked and Root nudged her with her elbow.

“It’s not a joke Sameen” Root frowned “you didn’t drink so it wouldn’t mask your symptoms right?”

“You need to stop Googling shit dude” Shaw shook her head and Root just stared at her.

“I’m right, aren’t I?”

“No.”

“Sameen” Root said sharply “you said you’d tell me if it got worse.”

“And I will, Root” Shaw said and looked at her “if it does, which it hasn’t”

“I think you should see a doctor” Root said and Shaw raised an eyebrow.

“Great” Shaw said “I’ll be sure to look in the mirror when I get home.”

Root rolled her eyes.

“Sam I’m worried.”

“You don’t have to be.” Shaw said “Trust me.”

*

Root’s clothes were practically coming off before she got through the front door. Shaw couldn’t stop her, and she didn’t. She watched as Root danced up the stairs to their door, starting to pull her jacket off already and unbutton her jeans. Shaw just smirked.

Root pulled her through the door and kicked it shut behind them.

“Oh hey there” Root said with a grin as she pulled her shirt off and pressed Shaw against the wall. Shaw just smirked, putting her hands on Root’s hips and watching her wife’s face closely.

“Hey pretty” Shaw smiled and leaned her head back against the wall, she could still feel the headache but she forced herself not to let it bother her.

“Can I get you anything?” Shaw asked Root, “do you want a glass of water?”

“I want you,” Root said leaning in closer to Shaw so their lips grazed together “and maybe also an aspirin, just in case.”

Shaw smiled against Root’s lips.

“You definitely didn’t go easy on the wine” Shaw said looking at Root’s eyes, she wondered if it were even possible to get tired of looking at Root. She was so fucking beautiful. Her eyes, her lips, that fucking nose, her face, she was like an angel. The way her hair fell messily over her shoulders, and the look in her eyes was lusty and sleepy at the same time.

Shaw thought perhaps Root’s eyes were her favourite thing about her, but then the word favourite just made her roll her eyes. She couldn’t pick a favourite thing. But she loved Root’s eyes, a lot. They looked so dark, dangerous even sometimes. But when Root was looking at Shaw it was completely different, they were soft and warm, like melted chocolate. And Shaw knew every fucking coloured speck that made up the colour.

“You know, it’s gonna be kind of hard for me to get you that Aspirin if you keep me pinned against the wall” Shaw pointed out and Root just smiled. Shaw could feel Root’s entire body weight pressed against her, she could feel her boobs, her hip bones, her thighs. The warmth of Root against her.

“I like you against the wall” Root said “like a gallery, and you’re a piece of art.”

Shaw raised an eyebrow with a small smile, before she pushed Root off her planting a kiss on her lips before she went into the kitchen to get Root some water and painkillers.

Root was sitting on the stairs when Shaw came back out, half expecting to find her passed out on their bed. But instead she was sitting on the stairway in her undies and bra, lounging against the wall, her foot poking through the gaps in the railing. Shaw went to hand Root the glass of water but she was looking at something on her phone.

“Are you trying to find weird animal videos again?” Shaw asked and sat down opposite Root on the steps. Root looked up with a smirk and put her phone down.

“I’m seeing how to treat a concussion actually” Root said and took the glass from Shaw taking a sip and swallowing the painkillers.

“Root,” Shaw sighed and Root just looked at her.

“You’re supposed to rest” Root said.

“I know” Shaw said.

“And no illegal drugs” Root added and Shaw smirked.

“Can you stop?”

Root leaned forward and put a hand on Shaw’s knee.

“I don’t want you to be hurt, baby” Root said softly and Shaw just looked at her. Those eyes. Again.

“And I don’t want you to be worried for no reason” Shaw said. Root looked at her for several moments without saying anything, just watching Shaw’s face.

“Wait here” Root said and pulled herself up dashing down the stairs and into the kitchen. Shaw raised an eyebrow and leaned back against the rails waiting for Root to come back. And a few seconds later she did, holding the blanket from the couch and an icepack.

“No” Shaw said immediately and Root just crouched down in front of her.

“Don’t tell me what to do” Root said placing the ice pack on top of Shaw’s head and then wrapping the blanket around her shoulders. Root looked at her with a cute smile spreading across her face.

Shaw didn’t protest, she knew the ice would probably help.

“I can’t” Root said unable to stop looking at Shaw.

“You can’t what?” Shaw asked.

“You look _so_ cute” Root grinned “I can’t believe you’re a sociopathic killer, you look like you’re about six years old”

Shaw rolled her eyes and tugged the blanket around her shoulders more. Root moved closer to her and wrapped her arms around Shaw, cuddling into the blanket feeling Shaw breath.

“I love you” Root mumbled.

“Do you wanna have sex?” Shaw smirked and Root lifted her head straight away and looked at Shaw.

“But your brain” Root said.

“Sex helps headaches” Shaw shrugged and Root glanced at the cold pack perched on Shaw’s head still and smiled a little.

“You might need to strip for me though,” Root giggled “because as much as you look super adorable…”

Before Root could get the rest of that sentence out, Shaw had pulled the pack off her head and discarded it on the stair below them, she wrapped herself around Root and placed a kiss on her lips shutting her up mid sentence.

Root’s hands found Shaw’s hair, her fingers tangling in the dark strands. Shaw kissed her harder, pushing her tongue into Root’s mouth. Then she pulled back, shedding the blanket off her shoulders and leaving Root sitting on the stairs as she made her way up towards their bedroom. Root watched her disappear into their room, and then seconds later her shirt come flying back out of the room and land at the top of the stairs. Root’s breath caught in her chest as a smile spread across her face, before she chased Shaw into the bedroom.

But when she got there Shaw wasn’t on the bed. Root could hear the shower running and she silently padded into the bathroom leaning against the door and smirking at Shaw.

“Now that was sexy” Root said moving closer to Shaw who was leaning against the sink.

“Do you wanna warm me up?” Shaw asked pulling Root closer, their skin touching, hips bumping together. Root’s lips caught Shaw’s and she kissed her deeply, fingers gripping each others skin, nails digging in leaving tiny red marks.

Root tasted like red wine, and Shaw tasted like home. Root could never get sick of kissing Shaw. It was like an addiction that kept getting more and more fuelled with every kiss. The feeling of her tongue, the softness of her lips, the taste, the fact that Shaw always knew exactly how to kiss her.

“I fucking love you” Root murmured against her lips pushing against her, but Shaw pushed back. Unclipping Root’s bra with one hand and letting it drop to the floor, she pulled Root’s underwear halfway down her thigh then let go, taking a step back into the shower letting the warm water spray her hair and skin, plastering it to her body.

“Get in here” Shaw said, her eyes were dark. Root found her irresistible, stepping out of her panties and straight into the shower, her hands reaching for Shaw’s face, cupping her jaw, kissing her again, and again, over and over.

Shaw’s hands were on her waist, they wandered around to her back, slipping further down pulling Root closer against her until there was no space between their bodies.

The shower steamed up fast, Shaw could feel Root’s hot breath on her neck, their bodies wet and sticky, pressed up against one another. Fingers, teeth, lips soft as silk. Then the feeling of the cold wall against her back. A shiver shot up Shaw’s spine as she opened her eyes to look at Root, to kiss her neck.

Then, suddenly Root pulled back. She stared at Shaw for a moment before Shaw moved back in and kissed her neck again.

“Hold on” Root said and pushed Shaw back against the wall.

“What?” Shaw asked.

“You look pale” Root said concern lining her voice.

“It’s winter” Shaw said and Root just frowned.

“Your pupils aren’t dilated” Root said looking at Shaw closely, her hand reaching for the tap and she turned the shower off.

“Come on seriously” Shaw huffed and Root just pulled her gently out of the shower wrapping a towel around her.

“Tell me” Root said demandingly “Exactly how you feel.”

“I’m okay” Shaw said “a little lightheaded and my vision spotted a couple of times, but that’s probably because we were in a steam box and I was turned on.”

“Your pupils dilate when you’re turned on” Root said and folded her arms Shaw just stared at her.

“I was hit in the head with a full speed airbag, Root, a little headache is expected.”

“What if you have a brain trauma?” Root said quietly and Shaw almost laughed as she walked out of the bathroom, pulling on a t-shirt and climbing into bed.

“I don’t” Shaw said and Root just climbed onto the bed on top of her, looking down at her worried.

“I want you to see a doctor” Root said.

“I am a doctor” Shaw said.

“I want you to go get a brain scan then” Root said.

“Will it make you feel better?” Shaw asked and Root just nodded. Shaw sighed.

“Why don’t you believe me?” Shaw asked. “I’m okay.”

“I know” Root said softly “I know, but I just couldn’t bare it if even there was a 2% chance that you weren’t.”

“I’ll get it sorted out tomorrow okay,” Shaw said and ran her finger down Root’s nose and tapped the end of it lightly. “I probably just need some painkillers and sleep.”

 _Tomorrow,_ Root thought. _Valentines Day._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this was supposed to be the valentines chapter but i'm sooo tired, so i'm gonna put it as a seperate chapter ;)
> 
> enjoy and lemme know what you think <3 Root is being so cute, but also pls Sam, I can't...
> 
> thank you for voicing your thoughts on the canon matter by the way, it's just as important for me to create a story that you guys will enjoy just as much as me. I'm still on the fence about whether I want to take it in that direction, I almost feel like it's not relevant to this story, however....if I do incorporate it I sure as shit won't be having any of this 9 months bullshit ;) dont you worry xx


	66. Valentines Day

When Root woke her hand instinctively stretched across the bed for Shaw, but instead of her finger bumping against the warmth of Shaw’s skin, she was greeted with the cold sheets. Her eyes opened, and she rolled over to face Shaw’s side of the bed staring at the empty spot. A small sigh fell from her lips, her fingers curling around the sheets where Shaw should have been asleep.

She lay there for a moment contemplating the empty space in the bed, her fingers stroking the sheets. It was Valentine’s Day, and her other half wasn’t even there. She wondered if Shaw was even downstairs, or whether she had gone to get her head checked.

Root yawned, and pulled herself from the warmth of the bed she pulled on a fluffy sweater and went downstairs to make coffee. As she walked into the kitchen she firstly noticed that Bear wasn’t asleep on her bed, and secondly noticed there was a single red rose in a clear jar filled with water in the middle of the counter.

A smile spread across Root’s lips immediately as she leaned across the counter and sniffed the rose, letting the soft petals touch the end of her nose. She made herself a coffee and went into the living room, sitting on the couch and tucking her legs underneath her. She was trying not to mope about the fact Shaw wasn’t here and it was Valentine’s. _Don’t be that girl_ Root told herself. _You have the best wife and it feels like valentines day almost every morning, so don’t be… sad._ Ugh. Easier said than done. She couldn’t ignore the stupid sinking feeling in her stomach as every minute passed that Shaw wasn’t here. She pulled her laptop onto her lap and decided to distract herself. She could take the laptop apart, then put it back together again blindfolded and hope that Shaw would be home by the time that happened?

Root sighed. Then the front door opened. She heard Bear’s paws across the hardwood floor as he went straight for the kitchen. She listened to for Shaw, she stared at her laptop screen, not wanting to seem like she had literally just been waiting.

Suddenly a pair of hands slipped around her head and covered her eyes.

“Hey pretty” Shaw said from behind her and kissed her shoulder.

A smile stretched across Root’s face as she felt Shaw’s breath against her neck. Shaw pulled her hands away from Root’s eyes and kissed her cheek.

“I thought you would sleep in” Shaw said and Root glanced at her.

“I didn’t even feel you leave” Root almost pouted and Shaw kissed her cheek again.

“That’s because I’m a ninja” Shaw smirked and Root rolled her eyes.

“No you’re an idiot” she said and turned around so she was facing Shaw, who was leaning against the back of the sofa.

“Happy Valentine’s day” Shaw smirked and Root kissed her lightly.

“I love you” Root said softly “even if you do sneak out of bed”

“I left you a flower though” Shaw said.

“Very thoughtful” Root smirked and pulled Shaw closer, the back of the couch still between them. Root glanced down at what Shaw was wearing, her hands over Shaw’s ass feeling the stretched fabric of gym gear. She glanced back up at Shaw.

“Where did you go?” Root asked “were you seeing a doctor?”

“No” Shaw said and Root narrowed her eyes.

“Sameen,” Root said with a small frown but Shaw just smiled. Root looked at her face and raised an eyebrow. “What?”

“Unwrap me” Shaw said and Root just stared at her.

“Unwrap you?” she replied and Shaw just nodded, pulling away from Root and holding out her hands. Root stared at her curiously. Shaw had a look of mischief tugging at the corners of her mouth, and a wicked glint behind her eyes. Root climbed over the couch and stood in front of Shaw.

“Are you giving yourself to me as a present?” Root asked reaching for the zipper on Shaw’s hoodie and slowly tugging it down. Shaw watched Root’s face with a smile.

“You’ll see” Shaw said and Root glanced at her, their eyes meeting. She tugged the jacket off Shaw’s shoulders and let it drop to the ground.

“Are you trying a new sex thing?” Root asked putting her hands on Shaw’s waist, her fingers nudging under the hem of her tank, fingertips touching Shaw’s skin.

“Shut up and undress me already” Shaw said and Root stared at her, before stealing a kiss from her lips then pulling Shaw’s shirt off in one easy move. As she let the shirt fall from her hands she examined Shaw’s body, admiring her abs, and muscles and then noticing a white patch on her ribs.

Her hand automatically moved to it, she could feel Shaw’s eyes on her.

“Are you trying to tell me you got shot again?” Root asked her eyes flickering up to look at Shaw before turning her attention back to the bandage that was stuck down with tape. Her nail scratched against Shaw’s skin as she pulled the tape up, and slowly peeled the bandage back. It was halfway off before Root realised what it was.

Shaw had a new tattoo.

Root couldn’t take her eyes off it. It was Roman numerals, it took her brain all of two seconds to figure out what they were too.

“Sam,” she said her voice a whisper as she gazed at the fresh ink “you got our wedding day tattooed.”

She finally looked up at Shaw who was just looking at her with a pleased smile. It was _that_ smile, that made Root all melty and gooey inside.

“It’s on me forever now” Shaw said with a smirk.

“Just like me” Root added and smirked back. Shaw just smiled. Root could feel her heart. _Fuck._

“That’s where you went this morning?” Root asked and Shaw just nodded. Root taped the tattoo back up with the bandage and slipped her arms around Shaw’s neck.

“I love it” Root said against Shaw’s lips. “And I love you.”

“I love you too” Shaw said and there went Root’s heart. Again. The smile gripped the corners of her mouth as she ducked her head into the crook of Shaw’s neck, feeling her cheeks flush pink at those words. Shaw kissed the side of Root’s head.

“Guess what?” Shaw asked and Root lifted her head looking at Shaw. “I feel better.”

“Do you?” Root asked watching her closely. Shaw knew Root could tell when she was lying.

“Yeah” Shaw said “Although my wrist is kind of achey” Shaw rolled her eyes at the look on Root’s face, “It’s probably nothing.”

“Good” Root said slowly “because we’re going out.”

Shaw looked inquisitively at Root.

“We are?” she asked and Root smiled.

“Get dressed.” Root instructed and Shaw immediately spun on her heel and dashed up the stairs.

When Shaw came back downstairs the front door was wide open, and Shaw could see Root outside sitting on her motorbike pulling on her leather riding gloves. Shaw bit the end of her tongue, there was something about seeing Root straddled on her bike that was just so damn hot. She pulled the door shut behind her and jumped down the steps towards Root, who glanced up at her with a cheeky grin as she tossed Shaw a helmet.

“Are you gonna tell me where we’re going?” Shaw asked and Root just started the engine, letting it purr underneath her. Shaw rolled her eyes with a smile as she climbed onto the back of the bike, pulling the helmet on and slipping her arms around Root’s waist.

Root could feel Shaw pressed against her back, her warmth, her arms firmly around Root’s waist. Root thought back to the morning they had woken up married. What should have been a hazy mess, was crystal clear in her mind. Shaw had been so grumpy, sharp, cutting edges. And now, here they were, Shaw had softened despite everything that she was and had been.

*

As Shaw climbed off the back of Root’s bike she narrowed her eyes at the building in front of them, glancing over her shoulder was the New York City skyline, she looked back at Root.

“What are we doing here?” Shaw asked wondering why Root had brought them to Brooklyn.

“Two things” Root said and held her hand out for Shaw.

“Are you planning on enlightening me any time soon?” Shaw asked with a smirk and Root just looked at her.

“Do you recognise this?” Root said leading her away from the building, around the corner and towards the park by the river. Shaw stared at the park, the skyline, then glanced at Root.

“Well that’s Manhattan” Shaw said sarcastically and glanced at Root who just nudged her arm lightly.

“It’s okay if you don’t remember” Root said “it was a long time ago.”

Shaw pulled Root to a stop and stared at her. It was almost like no time had passed. The way Root was looking at her. Those dark, beautiful eyes. She could feel Root’s hand in hers. She could feel the wedding ring. So much had changed.

“Views still the same” Shaw said and saw the look in Root’s eyes change as it became clear to her she knew exactly why they were here. “I don’t know whether it’s possible for you to get prettier, but I think you have.”

Root nibbled on her bottom lip, unable to look away from Shaw.

“You think I’d ever forget that night?” Shaw asked and Root just looked down.

“I don’t know” she said quietly “I was hoping you wouldn’t”

“I didn’t” Shaw reassured her, tipping Root’s chin up with her other hand so they were looking at each other again.

“That was our first fight” Root reminisced “I didn’t think we’d make it through that one to be honest.”

“And then you waited for me” Shaw smirked and led Root over to the exact same bench they’d sat on that morning at 4am as they waited for the sunrise.

“I was trying not to fall in love with you” Root said and joined Shaw in climbing up onto the bench, sitting on the back and staring at New York.

“How did that go?” Shaw said with a smile still looking at Root.

“Not well” Root said and glanced down at their hands, that were still laced together. “How did you feel?” Root asked, “last time we were sitting here?”

Shaw ran her thumb lightly over Root’s finger.

“How did I _feel_?” Shaw asked almost amused at the question and Root rolled her eyes with a grin.

“You know what I mean” Root said. Shaw looked at her, the sun hitting the side of her face.

“I was confused, as to why you’d stuck around, but I was…happy that you had” Shaw said “and in this exact spot, at that time, I thought you were the most goddamn beautiful thing I had ever seen, and all I wanted to do was tell you, but I couldn’t because I was so adamant on convincing myself that we weren’t going to work.”

“And now?” Root asked, she could feel her cheeks growing warm at Shaw’s words. Her heart was thrumming in her chest.

“Now,” Shaw said with a contemplative pause as she looked towards the view and took a deep breath.

“Now,” she said and turned to look back at Root “there is nowhere I’d rather be.”

Root smiled, she looked beautiful. Her hair tucked behind her ear as she looked down at their hands again, almost like she couldn’t believe it. Shaw watched her mouth open a little as if she wanted to say something, words on the tip of her tongue. But Shaw got there first.

“I love you too” Shaw said and Root’s head shot up as she looked at Shaw, hearing those words. Feeling her heart. Her eyes wide, warm, she looked happy. So happy.

“Last time we were here,” Root said “I kept telling myself over and over that I wasn’t allowed to fall in love with you, I couldn’t even look at you for too long because I knew I would, instantly.”

“I don’t get it” Shaw said with a little smile “I wasn’t even that nice to you.”

“I could _see_ you though” Root said “I knew you weren’t just this stone cold killer that you let everyone believe you were, I knew somewhere inside you was a warmth, because I saw it when you were around me, even if you weren’t always…pleasant.”

“You’ve always been my soft spot” Shaw said and bumped Root lightly.

“Do you think we ever would have come this far if we hadn’t gone to Vegas?” Root asked and Shaw just shook her head.

“I have no idea” Shaw said. “We weren’t in the greatest place before we left for that trip.”

“You didn’t even want me to come” Root smirked.

“Thank god you did” Shaw said, turning to look at Root. Root was almost caught off guard by the tone of Shaw’s voice, she was serious. The look in her eye was serious. She meant it. _Thank god you did._ It was almost a look of, I don’t want to know what would have happened if we hadn’t. Root’s eyebrows lifted a little at the look on Shaw’s face.

“I always told you we were perfect for each other” Root said with a smug shrug and Shaw’s face softened a little.

*

“This is number two?” Shaw asked as they took a seat at a restaurant that shared the same view as the park, right over the New York skyline. Shaw looked at the view with a smile and then looked down at the table.

“It’s hard to beat the skyline near sunset” Root said watching the look on Shaw’s face.

“Tell me,” Shaw said looking over at Root “how did you pick this place?”

Root quirked an eyebrow. “Honestly, She ran off a list of places to me months ago when I was thinking about dates”

“The Machine recommended this place?” Shaw clarified and Root suddenly looked confused.

“Yes, why?” she asked and Shaw just smiled with amusement.

“Of course” she chuckled to herself.

“What Sam?” Root asked and Shaw just looked at her, the smile fading to just the corners of her mouth.

“My parents came here” Shaw said softly “on their first date.”

Root’s eyes widened and she stared out the window at the skyline, gathering her thoughts, before looking back at Shaw.

“Is that…okay?” Root asked “that we’re here?”

Shaw rolled her eyes, the smile reappearing, melting Root’s heart with every second it lingered on her lips.

“It’s perfect.” Shaw said.

It was a strange kind of nostalgia that filled Shaw as they ate. It was Root, it was her parents, it was this place, it was New York. It’s like suddenly she could feel memories that she hadn’t even been able to feel at the time they were being created. She mostly thought about Root. She didn’t understand how Root had managed to capture her heart so easily, like she had walked straight past any walls Shaw had up and made it straight in. Simple, easy.

Shaw didn’t understand how she could look across the table at Root, and feel _everything_. How could she feel more alive when she was looking at Root, or with Root then she did at any other time. It was an unexplainable situation.

“I have something for you” Root said and pulled an envelope from her jacket. Shaw raised an eyebrow.

“You really are shooting hard for wife of the year” Shaw said with a smirk as Root pushed the envelope across the table to her.

Shaw picked up the envelope looking at Root suspiciously as she sliced it open with her finger and reached inside, pulling out two tickets. Upon further inspection she realised they were plane tickets. To the Bahamas. Her eyes widened, she looked at Root.

“Since I did you out of a little fun in the sun at New Years” Root said with a nonchalant shrug “I figured nows the perfect chance to make it up to you.”

“You’re…” Shaw couldn’t even find the right words. Root just smirked.

“Amazing?” Root helped “insightful? intelligent?”

“Definitely winning this whole Valentines Day competition” Shaw said with a grin and leaned across the table placing a light lingering kiss on Root’s lips.

“I don’t know, babe” Root mumbled against her lips “you got our wedding day permanently drawn on your body.”

“You still win” Shaw said and Root just stared at her. It wasn’t easily that Shaw admitted defeat, let alone handed Root a win. It was the look in her eye where Root could see the difference. She was just happy, grateful, whatever it was. Root couldn’t help but smile.

“I’m really glad I tried to burn you with an iron” Root said they eyes fixated on each other.

“Me too” Shaw said with a smile.

“I’m gonna get the bill” Root said glancing outside. It was dark, the sun had set. It had been a beautiful sunset, a beautiful day. Not as beautiful as the girl she’d spent it with. But it was close. She looked at Shaw.

“I’m not going anywhere” Shaw reassured her as Root got up and kissed her quickly. Shaw looked at the sparkling lights of the city. She rubbed the aching spot on her wrist making a mental note to check it when she got home, change the bandage. It almost felt like there was something under her skin.

*

When Root got back to the table after paying Shaw wasn’t in her seat. The table was empty. Root glanced around and assumed Shaw had gone to the bathroom. There was no point in asking any of the wait staff if they’d seen where Shaw had gone, Root thought, Shaw moved to fast, too quietly for anyone to ever notice her.

Root stared at the view one last time, counting the seconds in her head as she waited for Shaw to reappear. But as the minutes past and no one snuck up behind her, she wondered if perhaps Shaw had gone, followed her out.

Root looked down at the table to see if Shaw had left anything.

Her heart coming to a complete stop as she saw a fresh drop of blood on the white table cloth.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oh jesus I am so sorry, that was harder to write than anticipated....
> 
> dare I even ask how you feel now?
> 
>  
> 
> thank you endlessly for your amazing support xxx


	67. Everything and Nothing

Everything that happened next was a blur, a slow motion blur, and all Root could do was feel her heart beating in her chest, vibrating through her chest, so violently she thought her ribs might crack.

She didn’t hear the sound that was wrenched from her stomach, up her throat and projected from her mouth echoing around the restaurant. It was mostly empty aside from the staff who all spun around in shock at the sound of the ear piercing scream that she had emitted, as her fingers swiped at the blood on the table.

Root didn’t remember leaving the restaurant, she didn’t feel the tears pouring down her cheeks as she fumbled for the keys on her motorbike, she didn’t recall getting on and driving into the night.

The first thing that really left it’s mark was when she felt her stomach churn as she was on her way to Finch’s. She pulled over on a random street near a bunch of warehouses, yanking off her helmet just in time, staggering off her bike and vomiting into the gutter. The wrench of her stomach brought her back to the present, as she felt her chest ache from heaving. She wiped her mouth on the back of her hand. She was breathing heavily, she stared at the brick wall in front of her.

Samaritan had taken Shaw. She should having fucking known. She should have been more careful. With The Machine been off the grid she should have been on high alert, protecting herself, protecting Shaw. The crash had been staged. They taken Shaw, planted a chip. And now they’d taken her.

She could feel the hot tears sliding down her cheeks now. Then, suddenly, though the silence of the night.

“Can you hear me?”

Root froze. The Machine. Her jaw clenched as her hand automatically reached for the scar behind her ear.

“Absolutely” Root said her voice barely above a whisper.

“I’m sorry.” She said “I’ve let you down.”

Root’s chest felt tight, restricting her breathing like someone had their foot on her and was pressing down hard, waiting for every single one of her ribs to crack under the pressure. She sucked in a shaky breath.

“It’s not your fault” Root said quietly, her eyes still staring at the brick wall.

“I could not save Sameen.” She said and Root’s bottom lip trembled at the mention of Shaw’s name.

“Where is she?” Root asked, but silence followed. “Where is she?” Root screamed again when she didn’t receive an answer. She could feel herself shaking, her legs felt weak.

This couldn’t be happening, not after everything they had been through together. This wasn’t allowed to happen. No. It couldn’t. They couldn’t take Shaw. They couldn’t hurt the only thing that Root cared about, the only thing that kept her alive.

Root couldn’t get the image of Shaw out of her mind, the image of Shaw from only hours earlier, staring at her with those gentle fucking eyes. Telling Root she loved her.

It felt like Root’s heart was being ripped from her chest. It was the worst kind of nightmare. Some kind of sick joke, to have one of the best days of your life end in your wife being abducted. Kidnapped by the enemy.

Root was on her knees, her fingers scraping against the concrete as she gasped for air in between sobs. Everything was breaking, shattering, being crushed under the weight of her suddenly being alone. It hurt even more how easily she could imagine Shaw just appearing next to her, eyebrows raised, that stupid eye roll.

 _“What are you doing loser?”_ Shaw would say as she would grab Root under the arm and haul her to her feet. Root could just imagine the look on Shaw’s face, expressionless really, but the look behind her eyes would be concerned. She’d push Root’s hair behind her ears and wipe the smudge of dirt from her cheek.

Root wanted to hear Shaw’s footsteps behind her. She prayed to a god that didn’t exist, if it was real, let Shaw be there now.

But she was alone. All she had was her own skin and bone.

Her tears stopped. She took several deep and shaky breaths. She had to get Shaw back. If it was the last thing she ever did she had to get her wife back. Her heart.

Pulling herself back to her feet Root pulled her helmet back on and got back on her motorbike.

“I’m coming for you baby” Root whispered.

*

Root burst through the door into Finch’s. He immediately looked up at her and then glanced at his watch.

“What time is it?” he asked, but as he looked at Root seeing the sight of her as she dragged herself through the door he leapt to his feet.

“Root” he said rushing over to her. Tear stained face, something fairly disgusting smeared across her mouth. But it was the look behind her eyes that got to him the most. She almost looked dead. There was nothing behind those dark eyes, no light. Emptiness.

“They have her” Root said and Finch stared at her wide eyed.

“How?” he asked. No other questions. No clarification needed.

“W-we were at dinner” Root said pressing her eyes tightly shut at the memory, it was too fresh. It hurt too much to think about.

“Let’s make a timeline” Finch said “We’ll get her back, they can’t have gotten far”

Root just stood there, vacantly staring into space as Finch rushed around her. He glanced over his shoulder and looked at her. Stopping what he was doing immediately and guiding her over to the nearest chair, wrapping a blanket around her shoulders and handing her a glass of water.

“Root,” he said “they won’t kill her.”

Root immediately looked at him, and for a flickering second he felt scared of her, a different kind of terror from the first time. She didn’t say anything.

“They obviously need her for something” Finch said.

“They want to find Her” Root said languidly.

“Why not go after you, or _me_?” Finch asked mostly rhetorically.

“They know we’d never break” Root said staring at the glass of water in her hands. “But what they don’t understand about Sameen, is that she’s not made of glass”

Finch stared at her, and Root looked at him.

“She’s not going to break either.” Root said.

“You’re right about that” Finch said.

Root got to her feet.

“I have to find her.” she said and Finch reached for her.

“We need a plan” Finch said and Root just glared at him.

“She’s out there Harold, right now, there’s still time” Root said yanking open the guns locker with brute force the door slamming open, she reached for guns. Stuffing them into a black duffel bag, cleaning out almost the entire cupboard.

“Root” Finch’s voice said from behind her “I understand that-”

But his sentence didn’t get much further than that, Root spun around a gun in her hand, her jaw clenched. Tears rimming her dark eyes. She smelt like murder.

“No Harold” she said through gritted teeth “you absolutely do not understand” she said walking towards him, the duffel slung over one shoulder.

“Sameen is…” her voice trailed off as she struggled to find the right words. “Sam is my only reason for anything.” Root said and Finch glanced at the gun in her hand, the nonchalance she had in waving it around.

“You don’t understand Harold, you don’t know what _this_ feels like, they have my _wife_ , my reason for existing,” she said her jaw clenched so hard she could feel her teeth ache as she tried not to cry. “I can’t let them hurt her…they can’t have my heart.”

Finch said nothing. There was nothing he could say after that. Root sniffed, wiping her nose on her sleeve and shaking her head.

“I have to go” she said before she stormed out.

*

Root was exhausted. She found herself leaning against a wall, surrounded by dead men. Blood, guns, blood. Her shoulder was stinging from where she had narrowly missed a bullet. She was fighting against her eyes trying to keep them open. She couldn’t go to sleep, she couldn’t rest, not until she had found Shaw.

She could almost see Shaw standing on the other side of the warehouse she was in. Her arms crossed over her chest, staring right at Root.

 _“You should sleep_ ” Shaw would try and tell her. Root shook her head, she knew it was a hallucination. She couldn’t sleep.

“I want you hear your beating heart” Root mumbled. Then suddenly there was a hand on her shoulder, her arm was being pulled around someone’s neck, strong arms taking her weight. Reese.

“You can’t find her like this” Reese said quietly to her, she couldn’t even find the strength to protest. This had been the second hit already in one night. No one would tell her where Shaw was. She had shot out at lest four street cameras when The Machine refused to give her any information. She had taken out two squads of Control’s people. No one knew, no one could tell her.

“Finch found a truck, traced it to upstate New York” Reese told her.

“We have to-“ Root started but Reese cut her off.

“I know” Reese said, “but I’m driving.” he said and loaded Root into the backseat of a car and throwing her bag of weapons into the trunk.

Root felt the car start moving. A few stray tears slipped down her cheek as she stared at the roof of the car. _I’m scared_ she wanted to say _I can’t lose you_ she wanted to say to Shaw, _please…_

“Root” Reese’s voice said from the front seat. “Whatever she feels for you will get her through this.” he said, and then silence fell between them. That was all.

Root’s fingers curled into the palm of her hand, her nails digging in deeply. She was angry, she was terrified. It felt like part of her had been ripped off. _Everything_ hurt, every breath, every step.

They wouldn’t kill Shaw, Finch had been right about that. Not until they had what they wanted. She had time, she did. She would get Shaw back. She had to, because couldn’t even begin to fathom what would happen if she didn’t.

Root didn’t notice herself falling asleep. She barely noticed herself waking up. Her head was heavy, but not as heavy as her heart. She blurred in and out of consciousness. She didn’t really notice herself shooting some more men. She didn’t notice Reese having to pull her kicking and screaming off their dead bodies. She couldn’t feel her lungs on fire as she screamed. She didn’t notice the blood on her hands, the bruises on her knees. She _could_ feel her body getting weaker and weaker every time she cried, exhaustion setting in.

She _did_ remember finding the truck, abandoned. She remembered pulling the doors open, finding it empty. Heavy metal handcuffs and chains, blood smeared across the walls. It wasn’t Shaw’s. It couldn’t be. They wouldn’t do this to her. They couldn’t. It had to be their blood, Shaw fighting back.

“Let’s go” Reese had said pulling her away. She couldn’t fight him, she didn’t have the strength. She twisted her wedding ring round and round on her finger. Round and round. Round and round and round. Shaw was alive. She had to be. She had to be.

“We’re going after Control” Reese said to Finch. Root sat dazed in the passenger seat, staring mindlessly out the window.

“That is not a good idea Mr Reese” Finch’s voice said. “How is Root?”

“She’s taken out everyone we’ve come across” Reese said his voice low.

“And by taken out you mean?” Finch asked.

“Dead.” Reese said and glanced over at Root, blood stained finger nails twisting at her ring again.

“You can’t just…”

“I can’t stop her Finch” Reese said “I won’t.”

*

Root didn’t come into actual realisation about the past 48 hours until she had Control pinned to the floor of a cage, her hands around Control’s throat. Nothing but anger coursing through her veins.

“Tell me where she is” Root yelled at her, but Control didn’t say anything. Only driving Root to get madder and madder, tightening her grip on Control’s throat.

“I can’t tell you” Control hissed “if I don’t know”

“You know something” Root said pressing her thumbs deeper into her oesophagus, pulling her head forward and then smashing it back against the concrete knocking her unconscious. Root sat back, releasing Control’s limp head from her hands and wiping the sweat from across her forehead.

“Fucking useless” she muttered and looked up to see Reese waiting for her.

“Is she?” he asked and Root just got to her feet.

“No.” Root said and walked over to him.

“Are you okay?” he asked and Root shot him a look.

“No.” she said and he handed Root a gun.

“We’re going back to New York” he said. “We’ve done enough damage here.”

“I like blowing up cars though” Root said and Reese just smirked a little.

“Shaw would be proud” he said and Root just quickly looked away from him. She could manage herself thinking about Shaw constantly, just. But when someone else mentioned her, that gripping sadness dug it’s nails deep into her heart again. Twisting and tugging.

“Does Harry have a new lead in New York?” Root asked and Reese stared straight ahead at the road as they drove.

“No.” he said and Root looked at him.

“Then why are we going back?”

Reese said nothing.

“John,” she said loudly “ _why_ are we going back? 

“Root” he said.

“No” Root yelled “She could be anywhere, it’s been…it’s been almost three days” Root was frustrated and tired and angry, tears prickled in her eyes. “They could have taken her so far away, we’ve taken too long, we can’t just go back to New York, I have to…I have to find her, she’s going to be so mad it’s taken this long…”

“And what if she’s not…what if she’s nothing” Reese asked and Root just glowered in anger.

“She is not dead.” Root yelled loud and clear. “You don’t believe that.”

“No I don’t” Reese said “but we’ve used all our leads, we have nothing to go on anymore, and…we have to prepare for the possibility…”

“God” Root groaned in disgust “you sound like Harold, she’s not fucking dead okay” Root could barely get those words out without choking. _She wouldn’t leave me_.

Root leaned her head back against and shut her eyes tightly. Every time she shut her eyes she could see Shaw. She could feel her, closer. It was stupid, but it kept her going.

There was a thousand things about Shaw that she could think about, but the one thing that made her feel less broken was Shaw’s smile.

 _“Can I make you smile?_ Shaw had once asked her.

Root had been in a stubborn, sullen mood. _“No._ ” she had replied.

 _“I think I can_ ” Shaw had said, that infectious smile spreading across her mouth as she looked at Root. Root had to bite her lips to stop herself from immediately smiling at the sight of Shaw’s smile.

 _“Root”_ Shaw had said tipping Root’s chin up with a single finger so they were eye to eye.

 _“Do you want to know something?”_ Shaw had asked, that smile still playing at the corners of her mouth. Root had looked at her, unable to avoid that smile any longer.

_“What?”_

_“I’m glad you’re mine”_ Shaw had said, it had taken Root by surprise. Her face lifting, the look in her eye lightening. A smile automatically touching her lips, spreading across her face.

 _“Why?_ ” Root had asked trying to cover up her smile quickly not wanting Shaw to win that easily.

 _“Your face is my favourite thing in the world._ ”

Root’s eyes opened. She took a deep breath.

_I won’t give up on you, Sameen._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> angst!angst!angst!!!!
> 
> I can't handle Root like this, I'm not crying you are.
> 
> thank you for reading xxxxxx


	68. Versions of Us

“You gave up on her days ago” Root practically yelled at Finch on the side of the road as they stood underneath a camera, the little red light flashing above them. “You really think she’s dead.”

“I want to hold out hope” Finch said looking at Root with a pained expression, “but hope is painful.”

Hope is painful, Root thought. Hope hurts more than anything else because there is such a fucking terrifying chance that everything you wanted and imagined could come crashing down at your feet in seconds. Destroyed. Gone. But then there was the possibility, that your hope wasn’t for nothing. And that was enough to hold onto.

“Do you know what it’s like to love someone the way I love Sam?” Root asked Finch. “It means that no matter what the chances are, I’m not going to give up on her, not until I get an answer… not until I get her back.”

Finch just looked at her, sadness washing over his blue eyes.

“And if you never find her?”

“Goodbye Harold” Root said and turned away from him. This was as far as they’d come. If he wasn’t willing to go any further, if he would just give up on Shaw that quickly, Root would have to do this by herself.

The further she walked away, the more it hurt. Surrounded by people but she never felt more alone.

Every know and then she would have to stop, thinking she’d seen Shaw’s face in the crowd. Dark hair, dark eyes looking at her. But it wasn’t Shaw.

 _Go easy on me, New York_ Root thought as she sat down at one of the red tables and chairs in Times Square, watching the swarms of people rush around her. She felt lost, she could admit that much. Samaritan could have taken Shaw to any corner of the world by now. Root felt like she had failed, she had such a short amount of time where she could have found Shaw. She felt like she had missed something, she felt like there was something she should have figured out by now that would have led her straight to her wife. She felt deflated. Exhausted. Agonised.

She couldn’t bring herself to think about how Shaw was doing for very long. She couldn’t bare the thought of Shaw waiting for her, waiting, waiting, while Root got nowhere. The world had never felt so big. She had never felt so helpless.

 _I’m not losing you_ Root thought to Shaw. _Please be patient._

*

Shaw could hear the silence of the room before she even opened her eyes, finally regaining consciousness with no idea how long she had been wiped out that time. She couldn’t differentiate hours from days, day from night, it was always that same white hospital light.

Eventually the VR headset would be forced back over her eyes and she would be unwillingly transported into yet another simulation. Her muscles ached from lack of movement, being trapped on this bed, drugged, without the energy to move, chilled and covered in sweat.

Sure a sedative did a little damage, but it definitely wouldn’t be enough to stop her from getting out.

She heard the sound of the door unlocking. She almost sighed as she opened her eyes, the image of Root fading from the forefront of her mind. She would think about Root at every other moment when she wasn’t being forced into simulations. She wondered what Root was doing, probably killing in everyone in sight on some war path to find her. Or maybe they had her too. That was the worst case scenario. She needed to get out of here so she could find Root, make sure she was okay.

What if they were putting Root through this shit too, Root was strong, but feelings were a weakness in this situation.

The problem with these simulations is that the lines were getting blurred, every single time, her memory struggled to differentiate what was real and what they were making her believe. She held tightly onto specific memories, trying to keep that her clear path to not getting lost in her own mind. But sometimes that was easier said than done. Sometimes when they dangled Root in front of her, threatening to kill her if Shaw didn’t tell them what they wanted, or do what they wanted, she couldn’t tell what was real or not. She would see Root in front of her and not care about anything else. All she wanted was to keep Root safe.

 _“If they get me, kill me”_ Root had said to her. But with her gun aimed at Root’s head she could never bring herself to pull the trigger, so she would pull it on herself, over and over and over again.

And the time they didn’t manage to catch Root, Shaw couldn’t face the thought of never seeing her again. She pulled the trigger.

When they dragged her on their stupid little tours, she shot whoever they asked her to. The same bored, exhausted expression on her face, the same predicted sarcastic comments. The more they repeated, the more she thought in that moment she could tell the difference between real life and simulations. But then she saw the light leave the nurses eyes as they fell to the ground, and for a split second she wondered how they could possibly create something so real.

The more Shaw escaped, the more times she opened her eyes again and found herself still on that bed, sweat stained sheets, the more angry she got, the more frustrated. She went through all that. She fought her way out, all for nothing. It became dull, annoying, these stupid repetitions that would bore her to death before she could even escape.

 _“I never stopped looking for you, Sam”_ Root said reaching for Shaw’s face. Her hands were cold. Shaw looked at her. It was risky being this close to Root, but she needed be, just for a second. But as she looked at Root as the seconds past a frown formed on her face.

 _“What is it, Sameen?_ ” Root asked. Shaw said nothing. She just stared at Root. It looked like Root, it smelt like Root, fuck she even kissed like Root. But it was her eyes that made Shaw hesitate. That made Shaw think for a split second that wasn’t her real wife.

Yes, she looked concerned, and sad, and worried, and exhausted beyond belief. But that deep set feeling she got when she looked at Root wasn’t there, when they looked at each other and saw everything, she didn’t get that. She pulled out her gun.

Her eyes opened. The VR headset was removed and she was blinded by the white light, the sound of the beeping machine next to her filling her ears. She smirked. Their stupid pixelated game was good, but they couldn’t recreate Shaw’s marriage if they fucking tried.

“Why so smug, Sameen?” he asked.

“You losers have a weakness” Shaw muttered.

“And what would that be?”

“Root.”

*

Root had been hesitant to go home. She didn’t want to be there without Shaw, or rather, knowing Shaw was so far away. But she’d caved after several days.

Shaw was in Root’s dreams. She dreamed she finally found Shaw, they were reunited, she dreamed she lost Shaw, she dreamed she was looking, frustrated, heartbroken, devastated. She felt everything in her dreams. She would wake up exhausted. And then she would do it all over again. Searching. Shooting. Searching. Shooting. She had hit an all time low when she climbed onto the ledge of one of the tallest buildings in New York and threatened The Machine that she would walk across it with her eyes shut until The Machine helped her. Of course She had. She had said She was looking.

When Root opened her eyes she felt trapped, Bear was on top of her. Fast asleep. His head tucked soundly in the crook of her neck. She wrapped her arms around his warm body and held him close. He nudged her cheek with his nose. He smelt like Shaw.

Root thought about all the times she’d walked in and seen Bear happily on top of Shaw. The times she’d seen Shaw asleep next to Bear on his dog bed. She almost managed a smile at the thought. She kissed Bear’s face and then rolled out from underneath him. Root knew that Bear knew something was wrong. She stumbled through their house, tripping over computer cords and leftover take out food boxes. She didn’t know how long it had been, she didn’t know how everything had gotten so cluttered and messy. Time had passed. Paper was pinned up on every wall, photos of people who might know where Shaw was, locations, information. She looked like an actual crazy person.

She stumbled into the bathroom and briefly caught sight of her washed out complexion in the mirror, disheveled unwashed hair, dark eyes, lack of sleep, lack of sunlight. Lack of Shaw.

She splashed her face with water and brushed her teeth. Everything felt dull, lifeless. Her ability to imagine Shaw appearing behind her was fading, and even when she could it just made her feel more depressed. She wasn’t losing hope, she was just lost.

Suddenly a screeching sound in her ear brought her to her knees, she screamed and Bear came running.

“Can you hear me?”

Root was breathing hard, Bear whined and licked her face where she sat clutching the side of her head on the bathroom floor.

“Yes” Root groaned “Where is she, where is Sameen?”

The Machine started reciting a number. Root scrambled out of the bathroom and grabbed a piece of paper scribbing the number down, deciphering as she went.

“Is this…is this her number?” Root asked in despair “Why did you send me her number?” she yelled angrily kicking the nightstand with both her feet, knocking it over, the lamp crashing to the ground along with everything else on it.

Root scrunched up the piece of paper and got to her feet.

“Bear” she yelled snapping her fingers and grabbing one of Shaw’s sweaters. “Let’s go.”

As she left the house she hooked Bear onto his leash, shutting the door behind her and concealing her gun under the sweater just in time as she heard Sarah’s voice from next door.

“Samantha!” Sarah exclaimed and Root spun around, pretending not to notice the shocked looked on Sarah’s face when she saw how rough Root looked.

“Are you okay sweetie?” Sarah asked and Root just nodded.

“Awesome, thank you” Root said without expression and Sarah looked concerned.

“We’re heading out of town for a bit, up to my parents place in East Hampton, great location this time of year” Sarah said and Root suddenly froze.

“Location” she muttered.

“What was that?” Sarah asked.

Root fished in her pocket and pulled out the crumpled piece of paper.

“Location” she mumbled looked at the smudged writing, completely ignoring Sarah. It wasn’t Shaw’s number. It was a location. She pulled out her phone and typed in the coordinates. Maine.

Root ran down the street to the nearest camera.

“Is this where she is?” Root demanded holding the piece of paper up to the camera.

Silence.

“Tell me” Root yelled.

Silence.

“Fuck” Root shouted and screwed the paper back up again stuffing it in her pocket then looking at Bear who was staring at her expectantly. “We need a ride, Bear.”

*

Shaw had escaped. Again. But this time it hadn’t ended so quickly. She had taken out everyone in her way. Summoned the energy to get herself out. Run through endless corridors.

“This is just another fucking simulation” she had told one of Greer’s idiots before she’d shot him. “Don’t look so upset, he’ll pull me out any second now and you’ll be just fine.”

She had escaped the facility. She was in the middle of nowhere. It was raining. Dark clouds. She had a gun. Her whole body ached. But she kept going.

Root. Think about Root. Focus on what’s real. The little things, the moments between them only they would know about.

 _“I love this freckle”_ Root said kissing a spot on Shaw’s back shoulder blade as they lay in bed.

 _“That’s ridiculous”_ Shaw had said.

 _“You have more than one actually”_ Root said her finger trailing across Shaw’s back. _“It’s like a constellation”_

“ _Only you would say that”_ Shaw had said with a smile and an eye roll.

 _“It’s like a piece of art”_ Root said running her fingers between the freckles on Shaw’s back. _“I’d pin you against a wall”_ Root added and bit her lip.

 _“Even if we were in a room full of art, you’d be the only thing I stare at”_ Shaw had said and Root had rolled her over so they were looking at each other.

 _“Not if the art was of Ferrari’s”_ Root smirked and Shaw had kissed her.

*

The Machine’s location had gotten Root pretty close. It had been quite exacting in getting her to a point where she could find the facility where they must have been keeping Shaw.

She burst through the doors ready to shoot, but all she found were bodies. Already been taken out.

 _Sameen_. She kicked down multiple doors. She was close. She knew it. She could feel Shaw in her blood. She ran up the stairs and found herself looking through a mirror window into a room with an empty hospital bed. That had to have been Shaw’s. But she wasn’t there. The door was ajar. With her jaw clenched she retraced her steps back to the entrance.

Where would Shaw go. Root felt the rain hit her face, she looked up at the dark thundering clouds.

Weapons. Shaw would go for weapons. Then to the second town to the left on a map. Only Root would know that about her.

Root looked around the building. She could see garage near the parking lot. Running towards it she could feel her heart beating in her chest. Loudly, faster than normal. Adrenaline and fear in her veins. This was Samaritans turf. She wasn’t safe being here. But she need to get to Shaw. Shaw was all that mattered.

The latch to one of the garage doors in the block of storage units was broken, laying in the mud. Root stared at the corrugated iron, pulling her gun out as rain began to pelt down on her. She grabbed the handle to the garage with one hand, the other pointing the gun straight head. She didn’t know what or who she would find in there. But she had to be ready. This could be her death, right here. This was easily a trap. She pulled the door up, it rattled loudly. It was dark inside.

She immediately felt a pair of eyes looking at her. Her muscles tensed. Then suddenly she was being disarmed, her gun clattering to the floor, and seconds later her whole body hit the concrete floor hard, ribs bruising, a crushing feeling of another person landing on top of her, but they grabbed her roughly by the sweater before her head could crash against the floor and knock her out. Her heart was racing, she could feel her hands shaking.

She recognised that body weight on top of her anywhere. Anytime. _Sameen_.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> goddamn it Root is a fucking mess without Shaw....  
> also, sucks for Samaritian, not as easy to reproduce a Shoot marriage simulation that will convince Sam, as if they could ever smh, losers.
> 
> ((( p.s a rough time for how long Sam was gone is like 3 weeks absolute max )))
> 
> thoughts? feels? you can breathe now (maybe)


	69. If You Die, I Die Too

“Root?”

“Sam” Root lay there for a moment, breath jagged from the crushing fall to the concrete, she could see the silhouette of Shaw’s face above her. A smile began to spread across her face, she put a hand to Shaw’s face. Shaw looked confused and shocked more than anything, quickly scrambling to get off Root they both got back to their feet. Unable to look away from each other.

“Sameen,” Root couldn’t believe it, the elation of the moment more than she had ever anticipated. “I found you.”

Before Shaw had a chance to answer Root pulled her in, tightly embracing her, feeling her close, her body warmth. Root held her tightly, afraid to let go, that she would wake up and this would all be some horrible dream, that she would be alone in their house and Shaw would still be gone. She kissed the side of Shaw’s head, not wanting to release her. Everything felt right for a moment as she felt Shaw against her. But seconds later Shaw pushed her way out of Root’s arms, holding her by the shoulders at arms length, that perplexed look still on her face.

“She bought you back to me” Root said emotions welling up inside her, pulsing through her veins as she looked at Shaw.

“No” Shaw whispered her eyes darting around the garage. The look on Root’s face immediately faded into a frown. “No,” Shaw muttered again “this is different, you shouldn’t be here” she said, her voice was low, she didn’t look directly at Root as she spoke, it was a murmur like she was talking to herself, she stared vacantly into space.

“It’s a trap” Shaw said and looked back at Root.

Root glanced around nervously “then let’s get out of here.”

Shaw just looked at her, still keeping Root at arms length, strangely hesitant to let her close.

“No.” Shaw said and Root took a step toward her but Shaw immediately took a step back. Root stopped, Shaw’s behaviour was obvious.

“Sam” Root said “whatever happened…whatever they did to you, you’re safe now”

Shaw shook her head taking another wary step back.

“You don’t know that” Shaw said. “You don’t…”

Root tucked her gun into the back of her jeans and held her hands up slowly in front of her.

“Baby,” Root said softly “I’m here now.”

Shaw just looked at her, there was something different about the look in her eyes. Almost as if she were terrified.

“But you shouldn’t be” Shaw mumbled “you shouldn’t be”

“Why not?” Root asked. Shaw stared at the ground, her gun still in her hand.

“It’s complicated” Shaw said and Root took a careful step forward.

“Then explain it to me” Root said and Shaw looked up at her. It felt real, it felt so real. The way Root had kissed the side of her head, the way her fingers had tangled in Shaw’s hair as she held her tightly. The way she was looking at her. It looked like Root. It felt like Root. But Root wouldn’t be here. This had to be a new game, a new test. They were gonna come out at any moment and get them both. Trap Root, torture her, make Shaw watch. She couldn’t let that happen. Root had to go. Or Shaw had to go.

“Simulations” Shaw said quietly and Root raised an eyebrow. “They put me through simulations, hundreds of them”

Root frowned in Shaw’s pain, she wanted to collect Shaw up in her arms and hold her close again, tell her it was going to be okay. But she couldn’t, not right now. Not with Shaw wired up like this.

“They wanted to turn me against you, against everyone” Shaw said “I escaped, dozens of times, but you never made it here…this isn’t real”

“Sameen,” Root said realising the deep frustration and agony of the situation. “This is real, _I’m_ real”

“Yeah,” Shaw nodded “I’ve heard that before.”

“I’m serious” Root said. “If this is the first time I’m here don’t you think maybe that’s because this isn’t a simulation anymore?”

Shaw looked at her curiously, watching her every movement. Root swallowed, her hands still out in front of her. _Come on Sam_ she begged, _trust me_.

“Or maybe they changed their game” Shaw said “because I gave them their weakness.”

Root stared at her waiting for the answer.

“You.”

Root’s heart jumped in her chest at those words, but the reality quickly followed.

“How can I prove to you this is real?” Root asked and Shaw shook her head.

“I can’t answer that” Shaw said cautiously, if this was a simulation they were digging for information. Anything to break her.

“The simplest way to break someone is to rob them of their reality” Shaw said lifting her gun slowly and pointing it at Root. “I killed a lot of people”

Root stared down the barrel of the gun her wife was pointing at her. Shaw wouldn’t shoot her. She knew that for a fact. Root glanced away from the gun, barely flinching, and looked at Shaw.

“That wasn’t real Sam” Root said.

“You don’t know that” Shaw said “I d-don’t know that, not anymore, I don’t know if I’m calling the shots anymore”

Root let out a small sigh, glancing around them and then looking back at Shaw.

“You’re not going to hurt me” Root said.

“But they might” Shaw said “As long as I’m alive, you’re not safe.”

“They took you on Valentine’s Day,” Root said and shook her head “they’re the ones who aren’t safe.”

“Root this isn’t…”

“A joke?” Root asked and raised an eyebrow, taking a step closer to the gun, slowly lifting her hand and wrapping it around the barrel. Shaw stared at her with a frown, watching her closely. Intently.

“C’mon Sam,” Root said “as if they could simulate this, as if they could get anywhere near close to replicating our marriage, what we have, all those memories that no one else knows about.”

“They have ways” Shaw said “of finding out.”

“Maybe” Root said “But they’ll never know everything, not even close”

Root watched Shaw’s finger hesitate on the trigger. Twitch.

“You were the one person I could never kill” Shaw said “not once.”

The corners of Root’s mouth almost twitched into a smile as her hand dropped off Shaw’s gun, and she looked at her with that near smile. That was it. Shaw thought. That was the look. Or close to it, Root seemed different, she could describe it. She couldn’t pinpoint what it was.

“So I killed myself” Shaw continued “over and over, and I’d rather do that here and now than to risk your life.”

The look on Root’s face changed drastically again as she realised the immensity of Shaw’s words. The image of Shaw killing herself to save Root. Then, Shaw was turning the gun on herself, pointing it towards her own head still looking at Root.

Root could feel her heart racing. She could feel her pulse quickening, a sweat breaking out at the base of her neck. This wasn’t happening. She wouldn’t let it.

Root drew her gun from the back of her pants.

“Okay baby” Root said clicking the safety off her gun and pointing it directly up towards her chin. She watched the expression on Shaw’s face fall, change into an immediate frown, confusion, anger, concern.

“What the hell are you doing?” Shaw whispered.

“We’ll play it your way” Root said and moved closer to Shaw “You can’t live with me, I can’t live without you… so if you die, I die too.”

Shaw was frowning, deeply so it creased her forehead. She shook her head.

“Put that down” she instructed but Root just looked down the barrel of her own gun.

“September 16th” Root said and Shaw looked confused. “Tomorrow we will have been married for 6 months, feels like longer, I’m proud of us for making it this far although I never thought our downfall would be …quite this dramatic”

The confused frown on Shaw’s face turned to an agonising look of frustration as she stared at Root, so lost.

“I love so many things about you Sam” Root continued the gun still sharply pointed under her chin, ready to blow through her skull with a simple tap of the trigger. She wasn’t scared. She wasn’t sure what would happen after, but she wasn’t scared.

“I love how proudly you stand up for the good guys, I love how much you care, I love how strong you are, I _love_ your smile… your smile could stop wars” Root said the corners of her mouth turning up at the mere thought of Shaw’s radiant smile. “I love your heart too… you have so much courage Sam, you might think you’re in the dark, but there is so much light slipping through the cracks.”

Root breathed in deeply, stopping her eyes from welling up with tears as she looked at Shaw.

“I’ve never been much of a believer, but I hope we end up together on the other side” Root said with a small shrug and Shaw just shook her head. “I guess we’ll find out.”

“Damn it Root” Shaw said letting her gun fall from her hand and clatter to the floor. “Stop.” she demanded knocking Root’s gun from her hand.

Root stared at her shocked that Shaw had managed to bring herself back so quickly after hearing those words, even if it was just for the moment that counted. Root smiled a little.

“I don’t know about you” Root said “but home sounds really nice right about now, I’m sure Bear will be glad to have you back.”

“Bear” Shaw said quietly and Root just held her hand out for Shaw. Shaw stared at Root’s hand, she wasn’t entirely convinced yet, Root could see it on her face. It would take time, Root didn’t care. She had Shaw back. That’s all that mattered.

*

They stopped at a nearby town to rest for the night. Shaw was hesitant to stop but Root knew they wouldn’t be able to drive all the way back to New York tonight. Not with Shaw like that. And not when Root was exhausted. Shaw checked the doors and windows several times, and swept the room for any bugs or cameras. It was an old motel, that kind of technology was yet to hit this place. They would be safe. Entirely off the grid. But Root let Shaw check anyway.

“Come to bed, baby” Root said walking out of the bathroom and starting to pull off her clothes. The room was dimly lit with the two bed side lamps. Shaw was standing in the middle of the room, hovering like something was about to happen. She watched Root pull off her jeans, her shirt and toss them towards the arm chair. Shaw stared at Root’s skin closely, and found herself moving closer before she could think.

“Where’s your scar?” Shaw asked moving behind Root and running a finger across Root’s lower back. Root stood up straight at the feel of Shaw’s touch, and glanced over her shoulder at her wife.

“Which one?” Root smirked and Shaw just stared at Root’s skin.

“The one here” Shaw said trailing her thumb over the curve of Root’s hip. Root looked down at where Shaw’s hand was, then at Shaw, turning around so they were facing each other.

“I don’t have a scar there, Sam” Root said softly. Shaw looked confused.

“Yes you do”

Root shook her head.

“I have one here” Root said taking Shaw’s hand from her hip and putting it over her chest, their bullet wounds matching up.

“Right” Shaw said quietly looking at where her hand scar fitted perfectly over Root’s chest scar.

Root looked down at Shaw lovingly, moving her hands to Shaw’s cheeks lightly, tipping her head up so they were eye to eye.

“Get some sleep” Root told her. “You’ll feel better when you wake up.”

“Yeah” Shaw said quietly and Root kissed her forehead before climbing into the bed. She glanced back over at Shaw, who started peeling her clothes off before she got into bed. Shaw looked at Root as she climbed in, her eyes running over Root’s body before she looked away.

“Come” Root said without missing a beat. Shaw looked back at her and arched an eyebrow. “It’ll make me feel better too” Root said lifting the covers and waiting for Shaw to climb on top of her. Nestling herself between Root’s legs, her arms wrapping around Root’s torso, her head resting on Root’s chest. She felt at home, right here, where she could feel and hear every one of Root’s breaths, she could feel the warmth of her body, her muscles, her bones, her chest rising and falling.

Root’s fingers drew circles on Shaw’s back. She could feel Shaw’s eyelashes grazing against her skin every time she blinked. Shaw was home. She had her back.

“Do you trust me?” Root said quietly and Shaw lifted her head to look at Root.

“Yes” Shaw said.

“We’re going to be okay” Root said. “Do you believe me?”

“I want to” Shaw said, looking at her as she kissed Root’s stomach as she lay her head back down. _Watch her eyes_ Shaw reminded herself. Everything was in Root’s eyes. The truth was behind those chocolate brown eyes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so they may not be separated anymore (because that was just too much) but they're definitely not out of the woods with this one yet..... 
> 
>  
> 
> emotions? thoughts? everyone taking deep breaths I hope xxxx


	70. Please, Believe Me

When Root woke the bed was empty. Her hand stretched out for Shaw but was instead greeted with cold sheets. Her eyes fluttering open she rolled over and looked at the time, realising she wasn’t at home. She felt physically and emotionally drained, like that sleep had done absolutely nothing. She stared at the blinking light of the clock. She could hear the shower running. The panic for Shaw settling immediately at the sound of water.

Root pulled herself out of bed, knowing they could make it back to New York today if they left soon. She wandered into the bathroom and glanced at the steamed up door of the shower. It was empty. There was no shadow of Shaw inside. Root frowned and pulled the door open, only to find Shaw sitting at the bottom of the shower, one knee up, letting the water fall on her. Shaw looked up as the door opened and Root raised an eyebrow.

“You okay?”

“Yeah, sorry” Shaw replied.

“Don’t apologise” Root said. Shaw kept looking at her, slowly getting to her feet, her eyes locked on Root’s. Shaw took a step closer, water running off her body as she watched Root’s eyes.

“What is it?” Root asked quietly, one hand holding the shower door open. Shaw didn’t say anything, she simply touched Root’s face gently her fingers warm and wet from the shower, she pressed them against Root’s cheek. The smallest frown creasing her brow, she studied Root’s face closely.

As Root looked at her she could almost see the damage in Shaw’s head, the confusion, the melted lump of memories the simulations had left her with. It made Root sad to the core of her soul that they had done this to Shaw, she almost seemed like a different person. Root knew she was in there somewhere, she’d just have to give her time.

“Hold me” Shaw whispered, her eyes looking at her own hand against Root’s cheek. Root didn’t need to be prompted again. She stepped into the shower without a second thought, wrapping her arms around Shaw tightly, pulling her damp body closer until she could feel the water soaking through her shirt, Shaw’s skin sticking to hers. She held Shaw so tightly she thought perhaps they might end up moulding together. Shaw put her arms around Root, loosely, and then suddenly they tightened bringing Root closer.

“You’re okay” Root said to her quietly “I promise you are okay”

Shaw rested her head on Root’s shoulder, staring at the water droplets hitting the floor off her body. It almost felt normal, she could almost force herself to believe that nothing had happened when Root had her close like this.

They stayed like that for several minutes. Root wondered if Samaritan are already coming after them, they had to be. The Machine had gone quiet again, which wasn’t a good sign. They were on their own.

“Come on, Sam” Root said gently and pulled Shaw out of the shower with her. “Let’s go home.”

*

They had been driving for a couple of hours already. Root couldn’t stop glancing away from the road and over at Shaw, it was like she still had to make sure she was there. Shaw was staring mindlessly out the window, almost like she was in a trance. Her eyes were dark from exhaustion and sleep deprivation. She looked paler than normal, and upon further inspection still had blood caked under her nails.

Root couldn’t wait to get her home, into an environment she would recognise, she would associate with. Something that was just theirs.

It was like a hollow version of Shaw that sat next to her. She was there but she wasn’t.

They pulled over at the next gas station and Root got out of the car to fill it up. Leaning in Shaw’s window she looked at her wife.

“Do you want anything?” Root asked and Shaw kept her eyes forward, shook her head. Root looked at her for a few more seconds.

‘Sam,” she said, and Shaw’s attention turned towards Root. Root smiled a little as she looked at her. “Don’t go anywhere.” Root said and leaned in further kissing Shaw on the forehead before dashing into the store.

Shaw watched her. Everything about this felt so real, there were no glitches. She didn’t randomly end up with a gun in her hand. Root was acting fairly normally. But then Shaw saw Root’s hand go up to her ear, her cochlear implant ear. She watched Root’s lips move, she watched as Root glanced through the window of the store out to the car where Shaw was.

“What is it John?” Root asked rubbing her ear, the connection a little static.

“Where are you?” Reese asked.

“Leaving Maine” Root said. “Why?”

“Don’t come home” Reese said and Root frowned glancing out at Shaw. “Samaritan have found your house.”

Root’s heart stopped at those words.

“Are they…”

“I took care of it” Reese said “but steer clear for a bit… is Shaw-”

Root walked back out to the car.

“I have her” Root said opening the door and getting into the driver seat then realising Shaw wasn’t next to her, Root leapt back out of the car and looked around bewildered. As she spun back around towards the car suddenly Shaw was in front of her.

“I have to go” Root said to Reese, and a hand shot up to her heart as she let out a sigh of relief.

“Sameen” Root said but Shaw cut her off.

“Who was that?” Shaw asked, and suddenly Root could feel a gun being pressed into her stomach.

“That was John,” Root said calmly. Shaw narrowed her eyes.

“What did he say?” Shaw asked and Root just looked at her.

“He told me not to come home” Root said and looked down at Shaw’s wrist, there was still a bandage there. Her lips parted a little in thought, as she realised. Of course that’s why Samaritan weren’t ambushing them, they could still see where Shaw was.

 _Fuck_ Root thought and shook her head. Idiotic mistake.

“Sorry to break up this little gunpoint thing,” Root said and took a wary step back away from the gun. “But I just need to grab something from the back”

Shaw frowned. “What? No. What are you doing?”

Root popped the trunk and slowly moved around to it, glancing over at Shaw who was coming closer, gun still pointed at her. Root unzipped the duffel in the back and pulled out a small knife. Closing the trunk of the car and holding both her hands up, knife in one. Shaw glanced at the knife and then at Root.

“Put that down” Shaw said.

“You first” Root said and nodded at the gun Shaw had raised higher so it was aimed at Root’s chest. “I don’t really fancy another scar, and also I need your wrist.”

Shaw looked confused, glancing at her bandaged wrist and then at Root.

“Why?”

“You have a tracking device in there Sam” Root said “I need to get it out.”

“This is a cut” Shaw frowned “I got…hurt”

“Sameen” Root said softly and moved closer, putting one hand on the gun and looking straight at her wife. “Look at me.”

Shaw kept frowning as she looked slowly from the bandage over to Root.

“I’m not a bad guy, neither are you” Root said prying the gun slowly from Shaw’s hands and tucking it into her jeans, her eyes still locked with Shaw’s.

“You believe that right?” Root asked and Shaw nodded a little. Root flipped the knife around in her fingers and took a step in towards Shaw. She almost considered kissing her for the briefest moment, it’s not that she didn’t want to, it just didn’t seem like the right moment. And she didn’t want Shaw to freak out. Not that she had a reason to. They were married. Root pulled open the door to the backseat and gestured for Shaw to sit down.

“This will take all of two minutes” Root said as Shaw hesitantly sat down and Root crouched between her legs. She could feel Shaw watching her as she unwrapped the bandage, there was no visible lacerations where they had cut her skin to get it in. It had obviously been injected. Root looked closely at Shaw’s wrist, taking it in her hand, running her fingers over Shaw’s skin. She felt Shaw flinch at her touch, Shaw relaxed quickly though as she realised how normal this was for them. In fact, as Root’s fingers grazed over her wrist Shaw’s fingers curled around Root’s hand a little. Root stopped, and looked up at Shaw.

Shaw looked into Root’s eyes. Warm, gentle, tinted with concern, but still so soft and caring, you could see her whole heart through her eyes. That was Root.

“What?” Root asked her voice quiet.

Shaw looked at Root’s lips, then looked away. “Nothing.”

Root kept looking at her for a second longer and then pulled the knife out, feeling the tiny chip in Shaw’s wrist, she made a perfect incision, blood covered her fingers as she pulled it out, being extra careful to make sure she hadn’t damaged it.

“Put your hand out” she told Shaw who instinctively listened, opening her palm for Root to drop the bloodied chip in.

“How did I not realise” Shaw frowned in disgust at the chip that was in her hand. Root glanced at her.

“Because they didn’t let you” Root said and looked at Shaw’s wrist. “I don’t have anything to stitch this with”

Shaw looked back at her wrist. “It’s fine.”

Root took the chip from Shaw’s hand and glanced around the gas station, seeing a car with Iowa licence plates. Root smirked. The owner was obviously in the store, so she got to her feet and dashed over, reaching through the window planting the chip in the duffel bag on the backseat. She returned to Shaw who was bandaging her wrist up with a piece of her shirt.

“You ready?” Root asked and Shaw just nodded. She stood up put her hand on the door blocking Root from getting in. Root raised an eyebrow and Shaw just kissed her. Once. Quickly. But she kissed her none the less. Root smiled like an idiot and Shaw just went around to the other side of the car.

“What was that for?” Root asked as they got in. Shaw shrugged and stretched her legs out over Root’s lap.

“Thank you” Shaw said and leaned her head back against the window.

*

When they got back to New York Root checked in with Reese again, this time letting Shaw hear him too so she wouldn’t pull her gun out, even though Root still had it. Reese said the coast was clear at their place, but Root was too cautious. Samaritan didn’t know where Root’s old place was, it was on the shadow map. So they found themselves pulling up outside Root’s old apartment. Shaw looked up at it and then glanced at Root.

“Can’t seem to get away from this place” Shaw said and Root smirked as she got out of the car.

“We’ll be safe here” Root said, but couldn’t help but notice Shaw’s continuing caution with practically everything. She had her hand on her gun, which she had stolen back from Root the second they were out of the car. Ready to draw it out and shoot whoever as they made their way up the stairs. Everything about the way Shaw was acting was still so stiff, solider like. Routine. She had to make sure they were safe.

As they walked into the apartment Root was greeted with nostalgia, it almost seemed like a lifetime ago that she lived here, but at the same time it only felt like yesterday that they spent all their time here. She smiled a little and then heard a gun click behind her.

She turned around and saw that Shaw had her gun in her hand.

“Baby we’re fine” Root said comfortingly but Shaw looked pained.

“No” she whispered “I shouldn’t have come here, now they know”

“Sameen” Root said “They have no idea where we are, they think we’re headed to Iowa, it’s gonna be a long while before they come back here”

Shaw just shook her head in disbelief.

“If this isn’t real” Shaw said quietly “then I led them right to you.”

“This _is real_ ” Root told her. “You _know_ this is real Sam”

Shaw just stared at her, frustrated. Root could see the struggle happening behind those eyes, thousands of thoughts pulling and pushing her in different directions. Trying to make her lost. Confusing her to the point where her reality was blurred.

“Ground yourself” Root said and Shaw’s attention moved to Root’s words.

“How?”

“Like this” Root said moving towards Shaw, taking her face in her hands and kissing her. When Root broke away she looked at Shaw, the look in her eye had softened a little. “Would simulation Root do that?”

“Actually, yeah” Shaw said and Root smirked.

“Sam, if this is the first time this scenario has happened… then it’s not a simulation, okay?” Root said her fingers trailing down Shaw’s neck, Shaw’s eyes searching her face for concrete answers.

“Sometimes it changes” Shaw said her lips barely moving. Root tried not to sigh. She had the patience for this. She just hated seeing Shaw struggle mentally and physically.

“You need more sleep” Root said and looked towards the bedroom.

“Will you stay?” Shaw asked and Root just nodded.

“I’m not leaving you, Sameen” Root said.

Root followed Shaw into the bedroom and climbed onto the bed with her, flooded with memories of this room. Their relationship. Everything. She looked around the room and then looked at Shaw who had tucked herself up, her eyes already shut. It was fitting that they had ended up here. All their hard yards had been within these walls, all their bullet wounds, and arguments.

Root couldn’t take her eyes off Shaw, she looked so content, peaceful, when she was asleep. Everything was okay when she was asleep.

“My beautiful girl” Root said quietly “they can’t get you now, I’ll tear them apart if I have to.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> uh oh.  
> Shaw is still screwy.  
> And Root wants revenge.
> 
> x


	71. Safe Place

“How are you feeling?” Root asked walking into the bathroom. Shaw was slouched in the bath, surrounded by bubbles, her dark hair messily piled on top of her head. She looked so innocent, so unharmed. Root almost smiled.

Shaw glanced at her and reached for the tub of frozen yoghurt Root was eating. Root rolled her eyes, sitting cross legged on the bath mat and letting Shaw yank the tub from her hands.

“Better” Shaw said and Root smirked.

“And without the yoghurt?” Root asked.

“My head feels clearer” Shaw said catching that look of concern that was still lingering behind Root’s eyes, hesitant to leave.

“That’s good” Root nodded.

“They would inject me” Shaw said “a lot, with some drug that would just…” Shaw shook her head at the memory of it and Root winced. “I think now that it’s not in my system my brain is less jumbled, I can sort through…most things.”

“Should I make you list my scars?” Root asked prying her yoghurt back out of Shaw’s hands.

“Chest, shoulder, other shoulder, ribs, you have a tiny one on your upper back, and one on your knee from when you were a kid” Shaw said and Root lifted her eyebrows.

“What about the one on my hip?” Root asked and Shaw narrowed her eyes.

“You don’t have one there” she said slowly and Root smiled.

“Good” she said. “How many times have you shot me?”

“Once,” Shaw said raising her hand out from underneath the bubbles, she reached for Root’s shirt pulling it to the side to expose the scar on her shoulder. Root smirked as Shaw’s wet soapy hand brushed against her skin.

“How many times have we had sex?” Root asked glancing at Shaw. Their eyes met.

“I don’t keep a record” Shaw said “and I can’t differentiate the simulations and what’s real”

“We had sex in your simulations?” Root said with an amused smile playing at her mouth. Shaw rolled her eyes and sunk back down in the bath. Root watched Shaw, she was embarrassed.

“Was it good?” Root asked, intrigued.

“Realistic” Shaw said without looking at her. Root chewed her bottom lip, holding back a smile.

“Rate it” Root asked finding a small amount of enjoyment at seeing Shaw uncomfortable for once.

Shaw flicked a bubble with her flick and is dissolved, her eyes fixed on the water.

“Like eight” she said and Root raised an eyebrow.

“That’s pretty solid” Root said and Shaw glanced at her quickly.

“Yeah” Shaw said and Root caught her eye. “Stop thinking about it” Shaw said, seeing that it was still ticking over in Root’s mind the fact that Shaw’s simulations included sex.

“I have” Root said and Shaw rolled her eyes.

“I can see you haven’t.”

Root looked down at the bath mat. “Fine, now I’ve stopped.”

“Sure you have” Shaw said almost with a smirk on her face. Root looked up and watched her in silence for a few moments, it was relief she felt washing over her in that moment, that Shaw seemed nearly back to normal, close to conquering the trauma.

“Root, I can feel you staring at me” Shaw said.

“I want to stare at you” Root admitted.

“I look exactly the same as I did two minutes ago” Shaw said and looked over at her. Root said nothing and quickly shoved some frozen yoghurt into her mouth, looking down, away from Shaw.

Shaw could have said something in that moment, the way Root ducked her head to avoid a response, but Shaw stayed silent instead, watching Root intently. Whether this moment was real or not Shaw wanted it to last forever, there was something so perfectly content about it. If this wasn’t real Shaw wasn’t sure she would know how to go forward, everything about this seemed so life like, so real, and she was so tired that for a second she feared if this was another simulation she wouldn’t have the strength to keep going. This was everything was needed, right here, in whatever moment this was, real or simulation. She had Root. And it felt like the real Root.

“Sam” Root’s voice cut through her thoughts, and suddenly Shaw felt Root’s hand, cold from frozen yogurt, touching her wet arm.

“I’m here” Shaw said instinctively knowing that her absence had a negative affect on Root’s sanity, wanting to console that immediately.

“What’s going on in your head?” Root asked quietly.

“Nothing much” Shaw said “just processing”

Root poked a bubble in the bath until it popped.

“Are you okay?” Shaw asked watching Root.

Root nodded. “I’m just glad you’re back” Root said, Shaw thought she almost heard a tiny crack in Root’s voice as those words came out.

“Even if…” Root added then her voice trailed off. Shaw arched an eyebrow.

“If what?”

A slight smile was creeping onto Root’s lips. “You’re a little screwy.”

“Hey” Shaw said softly and flicked some water at Root making her flinch.

“I’m kidding” Root said and Shaw rolled her eyes with a small smirk.

“No you’re not” Shaw said.

“I just want you to get better” Root said.

“I’m trying” Shaw said “Trust me.”

“With my life.” Root answered.

*

“Don’t you want to go to sleep?” Root asked into the darkness. Her eyes were open, she was staring up towards the ceiling, not that she could see anything but blackness. She could feel Shaw next to her.

“No” Shaw’s voice replied after a beat. “It kind of just freaks me out now that I’m not sleep deprived”

“Sameen Shaw, freaked out?” Root asked with a soft touch of humour “They really messed with your head”

“I would tell you to sleep on the couch,” Shaw said “but I don’t want you to”

Root’s hand found Shaw’s in the dark, under the covers and squeezed it lightly.

“You can’t get rid of me even if you tried” Root said and Shaw let out a small sigh.

“You know, when I was training with the ISA they taught us if we were ever tortured to take our minds somewhere else” Shaw said quietly. Root could hear her breathing. “Someplace safe.”

“Where did you go?” Root asked, her fingers tracing the knuckles on Shaw’s hand.

“Nowhere” Shaw answered immediately “The training was bull, there was no safe place.”

“But you never broke” Root said turning her head towards Shaw.

“You know why?” Shaw asked.

“Because you’re stubborn?”

Shaw smirked in the darkness.

“Because what I was looking for wasn’t a safe _place_ ” Shaw said.

“What was it?”

Shaw moved beside Root, and Root could suddenly feel Shaw’s body pressed into hers.

“You” Shaw said her lips practically grazing over Root’s. “You’re my safe place.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is not a long chapter but I was too eager to post it just so you know I'm still here, words cannot describe how insanely busy I have been, nor how much I genuinely appreciate you guys sticking around and leaving me messages still, honestly, it's so incredible and touching.  
> I fully intend to finish both this fic and C&H, thank you so much for your patience.  
> You're all amazing.  
> xxxxxx


	72. Don't

Root wasn’t letting Shaw go anywhere. It had almost been a week and she had been trying to keep Shaw trapped, almost like she was training a dog. They had returned to their house after a long debate. It wasn’t easy. Shaw was feeling better physically, which meant that there was only a certain amount of captivity that she could take before she would start breaking shit, then breaking out. Root knew she couldn’t keep Shaw locked up safe forever. But she didn’t want to risk something happening to Shaw again. Hell, she barely let the her wife out of her sight for more than a few minutes.

 _“This is not healthy”_ Shaw had pointed out the other day. _“I get you trying to keep me here, but you shouldn’t be doing this to yourself too.”_ Root had ignored her. She could do what she wanted. But of course, Shaw was right. Root had gone to Finch’s once, hesitantly, and that was only to get some of her equipment. It had been almost a grieved silence between Harold and Root, neither knew what to say to one another. Root was still upset that he had given up so easily. And Finch was undoubtedly full of guilt. But the brief time that Root was away from Shaw was almost enough to give her anxiety, Finch was barely on her mind as she hurried to get back to Shaw as fast as she could. However as soon as she got back she found Shaw asleep on the couch. She would take Bear out for walks but after a circle around the block she wanted to go back. She needed to stop. But she couldn’t. She couldn’t take the risk of anything happening.

*

Root walked in to their bedroom. Shaw was sitting propped up on the bed, a hand pressed to her forehead, eyes shut.

“Are you okay?” Root asked and Shaw nodded without opening her eyes. Root stood at the end of the bed and folded her arms.

“Sam” she said and Shaw opened her eyes looking at Root, her hand still rubbing her forehead. “What is it?”

“Nothing” Shaw said swinging her legs off the bed and staring at the floor before she got up. “I’m gonna take a shower” she said and walked past Root without another word.

Root frowned. This wasn’t new behaviour, it was understandable behaviour. It had been happening on and off throughout the week. Shaw would suddenly just seem like everything had been sucked out of her. 

Root sat on the edge of the bed and listened to the water get turned on in the bathroom. She stared at her hands and wondered how she could make this better, or if that was even possible.

But Shaw wouldn’t even talk to her about it, which Root did understand, there was no part of her that wanted Shaw to have to relive what happened. But suffering in silence didn’t seem like the most helpful or healthy way to get through this. Maybe I should stop pushing her, Root thought. She shook her head. But then nothing would change. She had lost count of the amount of times she had tried to get Shaw to talk to her about what was going on in her head. She wanted to help, even if it was just with a kiss.

Root got to her feet and against her better judgement walked into the bathroom, the mirrors had been steamed up as had the glass walls of the shower. She gently pulled the door open and immediately looked down, finding Shaw in the same slumped position sitting at the bottom.

“This isn’t some post masturbation haze is it?” Root asked with a slight smirk. “Because if anything I am here for that reason.”

Shaw looked up at her almost with an amused look behind those dark eyes.

“Wouldn’t I look happier if I just had an orgasm?” Shaw smirked a little.

“Not if I wasn’t helping” Root said and crouched down so they were eye level.

“You gotta talk to me, baby” Root said softly 

Shaw stared at Root for several moments, water running off her body, her eyes were so dark. The silence was enough to make Root anxious. She wasn’t scared of this, she wasn’t allowed to be, but part of her was a little afraid of what Shaw could do. Or might do. That look in her eyes was unreadable, it could be dangerous or not. Root couldn’t tell.

Suddenly Shaw reached for Root. Root flinched. Shaw immediately frowned, her hand freezing halfway to Root.

“I’m sorry” Root said and looked down. Suddenly Shaw’s hand was lifting her chin so they were looking at each other.

“The only reason I’m so hesitant, is because I’m trying to protect you” Shaw said. Root stared into those dark eyes.

Suddenly Root could see the problem. They were both trying to protect each other, and instead of it actually working they were pushing each other apart. It was almost a relief to Root.

Root reached for Shaw’s hand and held it up in between them.

“Remember this?” Root said tracing the outline of the scar on Shaw’s palm from when they were hit by the same bullet.

“How could I forget?” Shaw asked.

“Do you remember why it happened?” Root asked and Shaw looked at her hand and then looked at Root.

“We were trying to protect each other” Shaw mumbled.

“Doesn’t seem to work out so well for us, does it sweetie?” Root said with a half smile.

“You can’t protect me from what’s already happened” Shaw said and Root stared at her. It almost hurt to hear her say those words. It made Root feel like she had failed.

“I’m not…” Root looked down letting go of Shaw’s hands. “I am not gonna let them get to you again.”

“You didn’t see them coming the first time” Shaw said “Neither did I. And neither of us would see them coming again.”

Root looked back at her. “They can’t come for you if they’re dead.”

“Root” Shaw said. It was a relief for Root to finally hear Shaw say her name. It sent a shiver down her spine. “Don’t.” Shaw said clearly.

“You can’t stop me, Sam” Root said. Shaw said nothing for a moment.

“You can’t kill them if you never leave the house.” Shaw pointed out. Root stared at her. There was a slight hostility in her voice. Root got to her feet and turned the shower off, grabbing a towel off the rail and holding it out for Shaw. Shaw reluctantly dragged herself up and snatched the towel from Root’s hands.

“I can’t let you go to them, Root” Shaw said. “They still want the Machine, and if they get you… it’s over.”

“Yeah, for them.” Root said and Shaw just stared at her.

“Don’t you get it?” Shaw said. “We can’t win.”

A frowned twitched on Root’s forehead.

“I’m not gonna let you be this _stupid_.” Shaw shook her head and walked into their bedroom.

“Is that why you’re not talking to me about anything?” Root asked trailing after her. “You don’t want me to do anything stupid?”

“I know what you’re like Root” Shaw said. “You’ll get upset because someone did a bad thing to me and you’ll go out for blood, but I’m telling you, _don’t_.”

“It’s more than just a little bad thing, Sameen” Root said and Shaw tugged on a t-shirt then glared at her.

“You’re not listening to me.” Shaw shook her head in disbelief, grabbing a sweater and then breezing out of the room.

“I don’t want to argue Sameen” Root called after her but was answered with the sound of Shaw thumping down the stairs. She waited a moment to see if Shaw would come back, before giving in and going down after her. When she got to the bottom of the stairs she froze, Shaw was crouched down attaching Bear’s leash by the door.

“What are you doing?” Root asked. “I’ve walked him.”

“I haven’t” Shaw said “Not for over a month.”

“Sam” Root frowned with concern.

“What you’re gonna stop me from doing this too?” Shaw scoffed. “You just do whatever you damn well want, don’t you?”

Root folded her arms defensively. “I don’t want to fight with you, about this.” she said softly and Shaw looked at her.

“No, but you’re ready to storm into Samaritan headquarters and blow all their heads off.” Shaw said.

“I just don’t think we should be giving up that easily.” Root argued.

“And I’m telling you, give it a rest.” Shaw said her eyes full of an intense frustration as she stared at Root. Root stared at her in silence, her lips pursed.

Shaw stood up and reached for the door, Bear eagerly at her heels. She paused and turned back around to look at Root.

“I think you need to consider what’s more important to you, your wife, or revenge” Shaw said “Because I like being married, and having a wife whose _alive_ , if you do this… I’m not sure I’ll be able to say that again.”

Root opened her mouth to say something but the door shut in her face.

The good news, Shaw was definitely back, mostly. The bad news, everything that just happened.

Root didn’t know how this had progressed so fast, yes she wanted revenge. There was no way that they were going to get away with torturing Shaw like that. But what she hadn’t counted on was Shaw being so stubbornly against it. Nor had she prepared for Shaw bringing up their marriage as some kind of ultimatum. 

Of course Shaw came first before any kind of revenge. But how could she be sure they were entirely safe if she didn’t get rid of them once and for all. Root sat on the step and felt herself being encased by the sudden emptiness and silence of the house.

She knew going after Shaw right now would be a bad idea. She knew she needed to trust that Shaw would be able to handle herself. All she was doing was walking the dog. Her dog. She would be fine. But something was gripping Root’s heart and she couldn’t seem to shake it. She twisted the ring around on her finger with a frown.

 _Don’t do anything stupid_ she tried to repeat to herself, thinking of Shaw. Wait for her to get back. Just wait.

Root shut her eyes and rested her head against the wall. She thought about how different it had been when she had rescued Shaw and bought her back. How Shaw practically clung to her and refused to let Root leave her side. How every minute was a struggle of reality or simulation, and how Shaw had eventually trusted that Root was telling the truth.

She considered a life without Shaw and knew it wasn’t worth living. But then she considered life on the run, constantly looking over their shoulder, never sure if she was safe, if Shaw was safe. That was hardly a life either. That was something she had been doing since she was 12 and had finally, barely, got away from feeling that way.

*

Shaw didn’t come back until it was almost dark. Root was worried but she wasn’t dare going to show it. She didn’t know what kind of mood Shaw would come back in, and after they way she had left she didn’t want to smother her. But she wasn’t going to let this issue slide either.

Root was sitting cross legged on the floor when she heard the door open and then shut a few moments later, followed by the sound of Bear’s paws on the wooden floor. Root was surrounded by small computer parts, her glasses sitting on the end of her nose threatening to fall off. She didn’t turn around. Relief had flooded through her when she heard the door. But she was annoyed too. At Shaw. At what had happened between them. She kept her eyes on the wire in her hands.

Bear came over and licked her face before continuing into the kitchen to see if there was any food in his bowl. Shaw’s footsteps came through moments later.

“Did you screw your head back on while I was gone?” Shaw’s voice asked from behind her. Root clenched her jaw at the comment. It was meant to be humorous but it wasn’t.

“I think we need to talk.” Root said quietly.

“So that’s a no then,” Shaw said rolling her eyes even though Root couldn’t see and walked off into the kitchen. Root stared after her, before dropping the wire in her hands and getting up.

“Sameen” Root said hovering in the doorway of the kitchen. “Most people are afraid of those words.”

“I’m not most people.” Shaw pointed out and glanced at Root. She was in socks with little red hearts on them, wearing glasses, with her hair piled in a collapsing bun on top of her head. It seemed almost ridiculous they were having this conversation in the first place.

“I’ve been running since I was 12 Shaw, you know that” Root started “and if you don’t let me do this, then that will be the rest of our lives, running.”

“Then we’ll move somewhere as far away as possible, some tiny remote island and just live there” Shaw said with a shrug as she started making dinner.

“You won’t be happy there.” Root said. “And then we’ll start hating each other, and-”

Shaw let out a loud sigh cutting Root off. “We’ll figure it out, but you are not going after them.”

“Sam, I need you to see it from my point of view” Root said softly but Shaw just shook her head snapping suddenly, and thumped her fist on the counter as she looked up at Root.

“And I need you to see it from mine.” Shaw said with an anger darkening her eyes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oh, ur welcome ;)
> 
> let me know your thoughts/feelings on this one!!   
> as always I forever appreciate all your endless love and support, and thank you for your patience I know some of you have been waiting for a B&S update for a looooong time!!


	73. Irrevocable

“I’m sleeping on the couch” Shaw said as she walked into their bedroom and yanked a blanket from the end of their bed. Root, who was already in bed reading frowned.

“You don’t need to do that” Root insisted but Shaw arched an eyebrow.

“I’m sleeping on the couch.” Shaw said again with a firmer tone and Root nibbled her bottom lip as if she had just been told off.

Shaw walked to the door and paused, the blanket in hand trailing half on the floor. Her hand reached up to hold the doorframe and she turned her head as if to glance over her shoulder back at Root.

“What?” Root asked still watching her. Shaw shook her head. It was the hesitation that made Root think this wasn’t one of their more serious fights, despite what Shaw had said. The hesitation that indicated that Shaw was considering staying.

“Nothing.” Shaw said. “I was just wondering if I should take the whole comforter.”

Root looked at the comforter over her legs and then back at Shaw.

“You wouldn’t have to if you just slept here” Root said.

“I wouldn’t have to sleep on the couch if my wife wasn’t being an asshole.” Shaw shot back turning to look at Root.

“I’m not.” Root said.

“You are” Shaw countered immediately. _Great,_ Root thought. Here we go again, as if this wasn’t the exact way they had just spent their entire evening. Bickering, arguing, saying things they didn’t mean.

“I’m just doing what I think is best, Sam” Root said.

“Is it best if I’m telling you no?” Shaw asked. Root stared at her.

“You’re scared.” Root said “and understandably so-”

Shaw rolled her eyes and started to shake her head turning to leave again.

“That is not why I’m telling you not to do this Root, goddamn it” Shaw hissed and hit the doorframe with the open palm of her hand in frustration. “I _know_ what they’re capable of” Shaw said staring at Root opening that the intensity in her eyes would get some sense into her. Root swallowed.

“But Sameen,” Root started and Shaw quickly cut her off.

“No, Root” Shaw said shutting her eyes. “You just got me back, do you really want to lose that again?”

Root said nothing. Shaw shook her head and went downstairs, making herself comfortable on the couch with Bear and staring up at the ceiling.

Her mind was ticking over trying to come up with ways that she could stop Root from doing this, to convince her not to. She couldn’t understand why Root just wouldn’t listen when she said no. She knew listening had never been Root’s strong suit, but when both of their lives were at risk she thought at least that would make a difference. And then Shaw realised, it had nothing to do with her own life. If Root did this she’d be sacrificing herself. Shaw would be free.

Shaw immediately sat up and Bear lifted his head in confusion.

“Fuck” she muttered. Bear licked her hand. Shaw looked at him and scratched his ears. “What are we gonna do with her, buddy?”

“Hopefully not kill me” Root’s voice said from behind Shaw. Shaw turned and saw Root hovering in the entrance to the living room. Undies, Shaw’s t-shirt, glasses on her head, stupid heart socks. Shaw sighed.

“No, Samaritan would do that for me” Shaw said and Root came closer.

“Can you please come to bed?” Root asked sitting on the back of the couch and reaching for a loose strand of Shaw’s hair, tucking it behind her ear, much to the disapproving look on Shaw’s face.

“Bear and I are fine here” Shaw said and Root glanced at the dog.

“Please” Root asked again, her voice soft, she ran the back of her fingers lightly over Shaw’s bare arm. Shaw turned to look at Root’s hand, her jaw clenched.

“I’m mad at you” Shaw said.

“So be mad at me in the same bed” Root replied.

Shaw opened her mouth to say something and then sighed loudly, running a hand over her face.

“I don’t want to let this go” Shaw said and looked up at Root, the look behind her eyes suddenly nothing more than tiredness. “But I’m too exhausted to have the same argument again.”

“Me too” Root said twirling a piece of Shaw’s dark hair around her finger. “Can we just leave this until the morning?”

Shaw looked at her. “No.”

“Baby” Root sighed, her eyes falling to Shaw’s lips. Shaw didn’t say anything else, her eyes wandered the room in thought, and then she looked down at the blanket picking a piece of fluff off it.

Root wasn’t going to get anything else from her, not tonight.

She looked beautiful, Root thought. Even though she was troubled and frustrated and angry. She looked perfectly beautiful, on the couch with their dog. It wasn’t a malicious anger when they were like this. When they still looked at each other with softness somewhere still in their hearts. Yes they were in a head locked disagreement but it could be worse, Root thought, so much worse.

Root took one last look at Shaw before getting off the couch slowly. She wanted to wrap her arms around her, but she didn’t. Instead she placed a light kiss on the corner of Shaw’s lips. Root felt Shaw turn into where her lips had been, a second after she had pulled away. Root didn’t look back at her, she didn’t need to, she knew exactly what expression was on Shaw’s face in that moment.

“I love you,” Root said under her breath as she walked back up the stairs to their bedroom.

“I love you” Shaw mumbled as she watched Root leave.

 

*

 

When Shaw woke up the next morning the house was still quiet. She felt a heavy weight on her and reached her arms around Bear who was still happily asleep on top of her. She slowly wiggled out from underneath him with a soft groan as she landed on the ground.

“Even Root isn’t this heavy” she complained as she kissed the top of his head and went into the kitchen to make herself coffee.

It was still early, there was no chance Root would be awake yet. Strangely she didn’t feel achey from sleeping on the couch, probably because there were a whole list of places worse than the expensive couch that she’d slept on in her life.

As she waited for her coffee her eyes wandered around the kitchen and she remembered the arguments of last night. She sighed. Shaw pulled her hair up on top of her head into a messy uncaring bun and took her coffee upstairs.

She nudged the door open with her foot, it wasn’t entirely closed. Root never shut the door, she only ever pulled it to. She didn’t like it being shut. Something from her childhood Shaw always assumed.

The room was dim, a touch of morning light leaked through the curtains.

Shaw peered around the door at the bed and saw Root, fast asleep. Starfished out on her stomach, hair strewn across the pillows, a little red heart socked foot sticking out from under the covers. Shaw almost smiled. She leaned on the doorframe to look for a few moments longer, taking a sip from her coffee contently.

Sometimes she could barely comprehend how drastically her life had changed in such a short amount of time. Shaw never thought she would have this. Not ever. Not a house or a dog. Certainly not a wife. She never thought she would have to sleep on the couch out of annoyance from an argument. Nor did she ever think it was remotely possible for her to care about someone the way she cared about Root.

The very same person who slept like a four year old in their parents bed, heart socks and all.

Shaw tried to look at Root and feel nothing, before quickly realising, it just wasn’t possible anymore.

She considered climbing onto the bed and waking Root up, letting slip part of the anger she had felt last night, if only to have a normal moment with her wife. But instead she went back downstairs. She needed Root to understand the severity of what she was trying to do, to understand how much Shaw _didn’t_ want her to do this, at all, ever.

It wasn’t like Shaw to give in and be soft, but she almost felt conflicted about how she was going about it. Root very rarely responded when Shaw went about things with anger, it wouldn’t be until Shaw softened and need she say emoted that Root would actually settle down. But this matter was different, and Shaw needed to be firm, despite what her stupid damn coal of a heart was telling her.

 

When Root woke up Shaw had already taken Bear out for a run and was back, sitting on the floor eating cornflakes and blueberries in a patch of sun. Root walked into the kitchen and glanced at Shaw.

“We have chairs” Root said and Shaw looked up from the newspaper article she had been submerged in.

“Oh that’s what those are,” Shaw gave a deadpan reply, “I’ve been wondering” she said and then looked back at the article. Root smirked and went straight to make coffee, glancing back at Shaw for a moment to imprint the image in her mind.

“How was the couch?” Root asked and heard Shaw let out a small sigh.

“I’ve had worse” Shaw said. “Bear’s a little heavier than you though, it took a bit of adjusting.”

“I don’t know how I should take that” Root replied, pouring her coffee and then bringing it over to where Shaw was, crouching in front of her and stealing a blueberry. Shaw looked up and their eyes finally met.

“Good morning” Root said, her face fairly close to Shaw’s. Definitely in each others space.

“Hi” Shaw said looking at her. The light hitting Root’s eyes, making that soft brown look like melted chocolate.

“I missed you” Root said.

“Yeah, you’re gonna miss me even more when you’re dead.” Shaw said and Root rolled her eyes.

“Can you at least wait for me to drink my coffee before you start this again?” she asked and Shaw looked back down at the paper.

“No” Shaw said.

“Passive aggressive doesn’t suit you, Sameen” Root said and Shaw glanced back up at her.

“Well I could hit you in the face and tell you the exact same thing if that would work better for you?” Shaw asked and Root just stared at her.

“Have you even considered my point of view yet?” Root asked.

“Have you considered mine?” Shaw asked.

“Yes actually” Root said and took a sip from her mug.

“And what? You decided we haven’t risked our lives enough? That being alive and happy doesn’t appeal to you anymore?” Shaw asked with a sarcastic delivery, but truth bleeding through her words, Root sighed.

“No, Sam” Root said and Shaw raised an eyebrow.

“It doesn’t appeal to you?” Shaw asked and Root almost cracked an amused smile.

“Stop it” Root pleaded.

“I won’t.” Shaw said and they looked at each other.

Root knew this wasn’t because Shaw was simply scared. In fact that was probably the least of her issues. Root knew it was because Shaw was trying to protect what they had, and that in itself was irrevocably sweet, and made Root’s heart beat just a little faster.

“If we were given the choice to go back and choose whether we get drunkly married or not, I would marry you every single time” Root said “I wouldn’t even consider trying it the other way just to see what happened, because I couldn’t imagine not being with you, despite everything we’ve been through.”

Shaw stared at her.

“Fuck you.” Shaw said. Root raised an eyebrow in mild shock waiting for a further comment. “You don’t get to say stupid dramatic crap like that, like it’s the end of one of your dumb romance books and you’re going off to be the hero. I don’t want you to be the hero. I want you to be my wife.”

Everything that existed in Root softened. Every cell in her body felt touched by Shaw’s words. She bit the end of her tongue.

“I am your wife.” Root said.

“Then act like it and _listen_ to me” Shaw said practically with a pout, gently shoving Root’s knees where she was crouched so she clumsily lost her balance and fell onto her ass.

“Don’t make all of this for nothing.” Shaw added. Root stared at Shaw until she forced herself to look away.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> they seem to be going in circles.... 
> 
> thoughts? feels? how are you?
> 
> your comments are always a highlight of my day :p x


	74. I've Already Chosen You

Shaw didn’t know what to do. She wanted to go back to work, back to the way everything was before all of this happened. She wanted that routine back. She wanted to take down bad guys. She wanted to shoot something. It was getting to her, not knowing what was coming next. What to do. What she should be doing. It was something she had never experienced before, she always had a plan. She always knew what to do. But suddenly here she was, standing on the street wondering what the hell she was meant to do.

Root was out, she hadn’t said where. Shaw didn’t mind, it didn’t worry her, she could only hope that Root was mulling over their continued conversation somewhere and not stealing blueprints to Samaritans headquarters.

Shaw had never had this problem before, of trying to convince someone to do what she said. I mean obviously she had forced people to do things she wanted before, but that was by using threats, or guns, or violence. None of those things would work on Root. None of them could assure her that Root would change her mind. All she had was words, so many words, and words had never gotten her very far before.

Shaw wanted to trust Root with this. But her stomach was unsettled and it was bothering her, like unresolved issues do, they sit at the back of your brain festering, taking over everything slowly until they’ve consumed you.

So Shaw stood there, on the sidewalk, as fat drops of rain started to splatter around her. Timely, she thought and frowned. She started to walk, with no particular direction in mind.

 

*

 

Root felt on the edge of a breakdown, like she was standing on the edge of a building trying not the jump, because if she jumped she knew her fate, but if she stepped down she didn’t know what might be waiting for her. She had left the house this morning hurriedly, Shaw’s words ringing in her head over and over and over again. _Don’t make this all for nothing._

It was a heavy sentence, and what was worse was that the more times Root repeated it over and over, the more she realised, Shaw was right. If she does this, what will she be reducing their marriage too? All this hard work, to get as far as they had, everything they’d been through. Would that then be all for nothing? And would Shaw then resent Root, dead or alive? That was a dark and unpleasant thought that lingered like a puff of smoke in Root’s mind. All of it, seemed to be clouding her original judgement which was, kill the enemy. But now, she was wavering. For the first time ever, it felt like her finger was shaking on the trigger.

Root looked at the Manhattan skyline from where she sat across on the bench in Brooklyn, where Shaw had taken her all that time ago to watch the sunrise. She was trying to make sense of anything in her head, but just like the heavy grey clouds, she couldn’t seem to see through any of it.

Rain started to fall around her, it felt fitting, it matched her mood. She couldn’t get Shaw out of her head. It was like a stupid montage of moments trapped on repeat circling around Root’s mind, trying to convince her that she was being dumb and all she ever wanted was Shaw, and now she had that, why would she let that go? For anything, ever.

The bench was a stupid idea. Root got to her feet and started to walk back to the ferry terminal. The bench bought back everything, every memory, every feeling. Shaw before she was like this. When she would deny all feelings, or be unable to recognise them. When their relationship was as simple as mutuals with benefits. Everything was sitting heavy on Root’s chest. The first time she saw Shaw naked, that feeling of terror and excitement suddenly pulsing through her veins making her feel light headed. The first time Shaw held her hand, and she felt her heart skip a beat. Everything was there. Not a moment slipped by unnoticed.

Root stared up at the sky with a frown, letting the rain drops hit her face. She was the only one on the deck of the boat, everyone else was threatened by the rain, or too sensible and decided to stay inside. But Root felt like this is what she needed, it felt kind of cleansing to be so exposed to the rain. It was drenching her clothes and her hair but she didn’t care.

“Do you need an umbrella?” Shaw’s voice said from behind her. Her eyes opened and she spun around to see her wife standing behind her. Root’s expression somewhere in between happy and confused.

“What are you doing?” Root asked. “How did you know I was going to be on this boat?”

“I didn’t.” Shaw said and walked towards her, and got entirely too close before wrapping her arms around Root’s waist and pulling them together.

Root felt an immediate surge of warmth at Shaw’s touch, their bodies being so close.

“I don’t actually have an umbrella” Shaw said before Root could find any words.

“I don’t want it to be all for nothing” Root said her cheek pressed against the side of Shaw’s wet hair as she pulled her wife closer.

“I know” Shaw said quietly.

“I’m just…” Root’s voice trailed off, and it was the way it cracked at the end that made Shaw look up immediately. Shaw studied her face, she was covered in raindrops so it was near impossible to tell whether they were tears or not, but it was something about the look in her eyes that suggested maybe they could be.

“Overwhelmed?” Shaw finished and Root just nodded.

“Me too” Shaw said, wiping her thumb across Root’s cheek removing the raindrop tears, only for them to be replaced immediately with more rain.

“I don’t like fighting with you” Root said “It makes me feel like I’m going insane.”

“I thought your sanity was never in question?” Shaw said with the smallest smirk and Root almost smiled.

“I just don’t want anything more to happen to you” Root said looking away from Shaw. “I can’t be without you.”

“But you’d risk yourself? And let me be without you?” Shaw shook her head, her arms loosening around Root. “How is that fair?”

“Sameen,” Root chewed her lip.

“That’s not fair, Root, that’s selfish. You can’t choose what happens to me.” Shaw said with a sigh and her arms fell away from Root entirely.

“I need you to choose me and be done with it.” Shaw said with a certain finality that meant she wasn’t going to go further with this argument, not anymore.

“I’ve already chosen you” Root said and Shaw turned to look at her.

“Have you?”

The boat had came into port and they were the last ones on board. They stared at each other, and it felt like they were slipping. Like the once solid grip they had managed to grab on each other was about to slip out of their hands.

Now there were tears. Shaw could tell. She was watching them well up in Root’s eyes before they spilt down her cheeks, disguised by the rain.

“Come on.” Shaw said and nodded to the door.

“I’m not going to put a gun to my head to try and stop you,” Shaw said as they exited the boat. She could feel Root beside her, the occasional and gentle bump of their arms.

“I want you to stop because I’m asking you to.” Shaw said and Root grabbed her hand.

“I’m hearing you, Sameen.” Root said and Shaw looked at her.

“But?”

“I’m on a ledge and I hesitated about what way to go.” Root said. Shaw rolled her eyes.

“Seriously Root? Death can’t be nearly half as attractive as me.”

Root couldn’t stop the amused smirk that stretched across her mouth as Shaw looked at her.

“Let’s go home before you catch a cold,” Shaw said “because like we need more drama.”

Root was grateful for Shaw’s humour, for her persistence, and ability to make everything seem so fine. It made everything seem just that little bit easier, and it was, genuinely with Shaw easier. They walked home without holding hands, but they stole looks at each other the way they did before they were married. And Root realised as she glanced at Shaw, that she was going to have to let this go. For Shaw. Because what was more important than her?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I haven't forgotten you <3333  
> Every intention to keep to update is still with me daily! 
> 
> Let me know what you think....  
> These two are never far from my mind, especially when I know they have so many issues to work out :P
> 
> Also wondering if I should drop the personal connection in here that is my instagram ;) just so you can if you wish follow my tiny gay heart in other areas too (i have some fairly cool travel coming up with my cute af better half)..... i've been playing with the idea of a blog lately too. Hm. We shall see. Obviously my gays first (that means you, and obviously these two) xxxx
> 
> I hope every one is happy and well, thank you for coming on this looooong journey with me. Stay tuned. I promise I'll try and update more regularly. Even if it means drinking coffee at 9pm x


	75. This Is It

When Shaw woke the next morning she felt like she’d been hit by a freight train. Her body felt everything, her head was groggy. She fought against her eyes to keep them open. Reaching out beside her the bed was cold, the spot next to her empty. Root wasn’t there. Her brow furrowed, as her fingers gripped the sheets where Root should have been in frustration.

Shaw’s neck felt stiff, she reached up and touched the side of it, feeling a slight twinge of pain. She ran her finger lightly over the spot again, gently, she could feel the mark. Swinging her legs off the bed she went into the bathroom, yanking her hair out of the way as she tilted her head and examined her neck in the mirror. She wasn’t wrong, it was a needle mark. Tiny and red, and right there on the side of her neck. Shaw ran her fingers over it one more time in disbelief before storming back out of the bathroom, she tossed the bedding, rifled through the drawers, sending things flying in all directions as she hunted for the culprit.

When she found nothing she sat on the edge of the bed and rubbed her temples. Trying to remember the last thing that happened last night. She remembered coming home with Root. She remembered their quiet evening, they hadn’t spoken much still being at odds about Samaritan. Root had been on her laptop on the couch,her ankles crossed, glasses on the end of her nose, Shaw had been cleaning their guns on the floor in front of her. Root would occasionally sigh and Shaw would glance over her shoulder, but Root wouldn’t be looking. Although she would feel Root’s eyes on her as soon as she looked away.  
****

Shaw tried to remember going to bed, she hadn’t suggested sleeping on the couch, that much she knew. But actually going to bed, her mind was clouded. She couldn’t remember the details. She felt her chest tighten.

“Root?” she yelled out, her voice echoed through their house. One, two, three seconds of silence. Followed by what seemed like an eternity more.

There were two potential scenarios right now, she thought. One, Samaritan had taken Root. Unlikely, but not out of the question. Or two, Root had chosen Samaritan, against Shaw’s word, over their marriage. Shaw’s jaw clenched, she got to her feet and went back into the bathroom, kicking their rubbish bin over and crouching down in front of it. There it was, under several tissues, the needle that Root had used to put Shaw out so she wouldn’t be able to stop her from leaving. From doing the one thing that Shaw had begged her not to. Shaw picked up the syringe, clenching her fist around it until she heard the plastic crack.

Her head pounded, but nowhere near as much as her heart was. She was mad. Furious even, that Root could be so selfish. But it wasn’t even that, Shaw knew that Root was doing it for her. But she didn’t want her to, and she hadn’t listened. Goddamn she hadn’t listened. Shaw felt like she had failed. She should have tried harder to make Root listen, to stop her.

Shaw stood in the bathroom feeling like her world was dramatically shrinking around her. She didn’t know why she had believed Root wouldn’t do this, her wife was just as stubborn as her, and if the situation was reversed Shaw knew that she would more than likely have done the same thing. To protect Root.

But this wasn’t what Shaw had wanted, not ever. She didn’t want Root risking herself, she didn’t want Root anywhere near those people. She shut her eyes her fists clenched. Root wouldn’t die, she told herself. She wouldn’t die. She wouldn’t. She couldn’t. There was no way she would do that to Shaw. She couldn’t possibly be that selfish. Shaw didn’t know what to do with herself. She knew if Root didn’t want to be followed there was no way on earth Shaw would be able to find her.

 _Oh god_ Shaw thought suddenly, the thought crashing ungraciously into her head, _what if Root is dead already?_

Her jaw tightened. Her eyes opened. They were wet. Tears? She blinked several times. Two water slides wet her cheeks. She pulled her phone from her pocket, and held it up to her ear.

“A little busy here, I’ll get back to you” Root’s voice said down the phone, Shaw’s breath caught in her chest, what if this was all she was left with of Root. Her goddamn stupid voicemail. Like one of those tragic movies.

Beep.

“I’ll kill you,” Shaw said after the tone. “ _Honey_.”

She hung up. She could feel her heart. That unfamiliar thumping in her chest that she had never noticed before. The back of her hand wiped her cheeks dry.

There was nothing more she could do. But that wouldn’t stop her from at least trying. Root was out there somewhere, she had to be.

“She’s not dead” Shaw muttered under her breath. “She’s not allowed to be.”

Shaw almost believed the words coming out of her mouth, she also for a split second thought that perhaps she would be able to _feel_ if Root had died. She almost rolled her eyes at herself straight after that thought flickered through her mind. _As if_ she countered the thought. A dead person is a dead person.

But Root, no. Shaw would bring her back from the dead and kill her herself if she had been so stupid as to actually march into Samaritan and try and take them out.

Shaw whistled for Bear, grabbing her jacket off the chair, and tucking her two hand guns into the back of her pants.

“Where did Root go?” Shaw asked the dog as he came running into the room. Bear looked at her and tilted his head to the side.

“Did she drug you too?” Shaw asked him and he whined. “Yeah we’re gonna have to talk to her about that, aren’t we.” Shaw said pointed at the door where his leash was.

She knew it was stupid she was even trying to hold out hope Root wasn’t out there being tortured and murdered by Samaritan, but she couldn’t face the truth right now. For once in her life, she just wanted to live in the bubble in her head where everything was actually okay.

As Shaw walked down the street she felt abused by the rest of the world, all the people of New York going about their everyday lives, their mundane lives, with their partners, and their kids. Not having to run from a super machine, not living in fear of being hunted down and killed. Most of these people probably weren’t even carrying guns right now, and if they were chances are they would never have to use them. She resented all the people passing her on the street, the woman on the phone to her husband making dinner plans, the father with his son, the teenager smiling at her phone. They didn’t have to worry about Samaritan, they didn’t have to even consider whether their wife was dead or alive at this very moment.

Shaw punched the crosswalk button, and the woman next to her took a step back. Shaw rolled her eyes. She was fuming underneath all the worry. It used to be the other way around, she used to just get angry and the worry would be drowned out. Not anymore. Didn’t mean she still wasn’t angry though, she could feel it pulsing in her veins. The one person in this goddamn world she thought she could trust, went and did the one thing that Shaw had asked her not to do.

She felt hot and shaky. Her head still felt groggy from the drugging. She didn’t even know where she was going. She glanced up at the camera above her.

“Should I even bother asking you?” Shaw asked. The little red light flashed at her. She almost laughed.

“Piece of shit, you’re the one that should be dead, not her.”

The call box beside her started ringing. Shaw’s entire body stiffened. She let it ring for a few more seconds before she took a step forward to pick it up.

“Sierra, tango, oscar, papa” the machine’s crackly voice spoke into her ear. Shaw’s jaw clenched. “Sierra, tango, oscar, papa” the machine repeated.

“Just tell me if she’s okay” Shaw said through clenched teeth.

“Sierra, tango, oscar, papa”

“Goddamn it, you know, you know exactly where she is so just tell me,” Shaw yelled down the phone. “Just tell me.” Shaw begged. “Is she okay?”

“Sierra, tango, os-“

Shaw slammed the phone down.

Stop. The Machine was telling her to stop.

“I am not stopping” Shaw said looking back up at the camera again, the infuriating red light still blinking at her cluelessly. “I won’t stop until you tell me where she is, or if she’s okay.”

Shaw walked away, even more frustrated and upset than before. She didn’t know why The Machine wouldn’t help her, especially if Root was in danger. Surely The Machine wouldn’t want Root to do this.

She walked past another payphone and it started ringing. She snatched it up.

“What?”

“Four, alfa, foxtrot.”

Shaw stopped.

“Four, alfa, foxtrot.”

“Why are you saying that? Four alarm fire? Did she tell you to say that?” Shaw asked.

The little camera light above her stopped flashing. She stared at it. One, two, three, four, it started flashing again.

“She told you to say that?” Shaw could feel everything inside her racing. Root was alive. She had to be.

“Thank you,” Shaw said as she hung up the phone. “Was that so hard?”

She still had no idea where Root was, but the chance of her more than likely still being alive was all that she could ask for.

*

Shaw had checked everywhere that she could think of. She was exhausted, and hurt, and she wanted nothing more than to wake up from all this and realise it was dream, or hell, even another goddamn simulation.

But it wasn’t, and she knew that. It was as real as ever. And the last place that she hadn’t checked was Finch’s. It was too obvious, and that wasn’t the kind of person that Root was. But nevertheless, the door banged open as she walked in, and down the stairs, Bear sniffed at the floor.

When she walked around the corner to the subway, she was immediately greeted by at least six different strangers.

“What the hell is this?” she demanded automatically reaching for her gun. Bear started barking and growling, tugging on the leash. The group of strangers looked up, startled, scared. On further inspection Shaw noticed they were all on computers, laptops, servers surrounding them, cords everywhere.

She walked closer, Bear still growling.

“Who wants to tell me?” Shaw said pointing her gun backwards and forwards between them. None of them managed to speak.

“Eeny, meeny, miny,” Shaw said and then rested her gun between the shoulder blades of the one guy who hadn’t looked up at her “Moe.” she said. She felt him freeze at the end of her gun. He turned around slowly, his eyes met hers. He swallowed hard.

“Who are you?” he managed.

“How about I ask the questions” Shaw said her voice low. He just nodded.

“What are you doing here?” she demanded. “How did you get in here, and who the fuck are you?”

“I, uh, we, just, um…” he was shaking. “They just said…”

“Whose they?” Shaw asked.

“The um, the hot one, and the old guy” he said. Shaw frowned.

“Can anyone here elaborate more than this stuttering fool?” she asked. The only girl in the group stood up. Shaw raised an eyebrow.

“Samantha asked us to help her.” the girl said. “She said it was safe here, and we’d be undetected.”

“Samantha” Shaw repeated.

The girl nodded. She didn’t seem scared.

“And what are you helping her with, exactly?”

“A job.” the girl said. Shaw knew she wasn’t going to get much out of them. They were all either too terrified to speak, or they were this girl and locked like a vault.

“Do you know where she is?” Shaw asked.

The girl said nothing.

“I said, do you know where she is?” Shaw repeated louder. The girl shifted and looked down.

“She didn’t say exactly where she was gonna be” she mumbled.

“Not good enough” Shaw said her gun still pointed at them.

“We honestly don’t know” the girl said.

“Gotta do better than that” Shaw shrugged.

The girl thought for a moment, everyones breath caught.

“We’re running our job through several other servers in New York, she could be at one of them” the girl said.

“Where.”

The girl gestured at one of her friends and he quickly started getting the address from his laptop and scribbling it down on a scrap of paper.

“here” he said handing it to Shaw without making direct eye contact. Shaw snatched up the piece of paper and looked at the couple of addresses scrawled with a shaky hand onto the paper.

She tucked her gun back into her pants and everyone seemed to exhale.

“If you’re wrong about this, I’ll be back.” Shaw said looking between them. “And I don’t want to have to come back.”

They all averted their eyes, and turned back to their screens silently. Shaw rolled her eyes tugging on Bear’s leash and spinning on her heel to the door.

*

Out of the two places they had given her, Shaw went with the unfamiliar one first. When she got there it was nothing but a door in a wall. A door made of steel, with indistinguishable words tagged across it. Shaw sighed pulling out her gun and shooting the lock before barging inside. She wedged a piece of wood across the door, before following the narrow dimly lit passageway. It took her until she had shot open the next bolt to consider the fact this could be Samaritan, although unlikely the definite chance she wasn’t about to walk into a bad situation couldn’t be ruled out. But it was too late for reconsidering. The door was swinging open, and she wanted her wife back.

Leaving Bear at the door she walked in, gun in her hand. She could hear the hum of computer servers running, but there was no sound of people, her footsteps echoed softly. She walked around the corner and saw the servers, almost creating separate rooms in the warehouse with their magnitude. Shaw hovered quietly beside one, unsure what, or who she would find around the corner.

Suddenly Root stepped around the server, gun pointed directly at Shaw’s head. It took them a split second to realise who they were looking at. That they were faced with each other.

Relief washed over Shaw, her wife was in front of her, not harmed, not dead. Everything inside her finally released, including her anger.

It took a split second. The gun pointed at her head, Shaw smacked the gun from Root’s hand, sending it flying, clattering to the floor. She grabbed Root by the throat, and slammed her up against the server.

Root didn’t even try to talk her way out of it. Instead she tried to push Shaw off. Grabbing her arm and prying it off her neck, bending Shaw’s fingers backwards an unnatural amount until Shaw flinched and yanked her hand away. Shaw cracked her neck to the side, glanced at Root and then went for her again, but Root knew Shaw too well, she reached around and pulled one of her guns from her wife’s pants, stopping her head in her tracks by plunging the end into Shaw’s stomach.

“You wouldn’t” Shaw muttered and without any disregard for what she was about to do, threw an uppercut at her wife, catching her jaw and nose, and once again sending the gun crashing to the concrete floor. Root’s head banged back against the metal server’s loudly and reached up for her face, rubbing her jaw. Blood filled Root’s mouth and she looked at Shaw.

“Sameen” she tried but she could tell Shaw wasn’t going to listen, her eyes had gone dark. She knew Shaw had every right to be angry, but she also wanted to at least try and explain herself, although as she had predicted it wasn’t going to go down well.

“Don’t” Shaw growled, grabbing her wife off the server and spinning them around shoving her backwards into the open space. “You _drugged_ me.”

“Sam I know, I just-“

Shaw shook her head, and lurched towards Root again. But Root was fast, thanks to Shaw teaching her. And she immediately moved out of the way, catching Shaw’s arm and twisting it up behind her back. She stepped in close behind her wife, holding her arm tightly, waiting for it to get uncomfortable. Shaw could feel Root’s breath on her neck. She tried to hold onto her anger but she could feel it slipping already, because what she could feel was her wife, right behind her.

“Sameen, I need you to listen” Root said.

“No” Shaw growled yanking her arm back. “Why the _hell_ should I listen to you, when you clearly never listen to me.”

Root sighed. She did have a point. She blocked another one of Shaw’s shots, then kicked her down at the knees, watching her start getting more frustrated that even her physical approach wasn’t working. Shaw scrambled back to her feet, a little less together than she had been moments ago.

“Sam I just” Root started but Shaw had a new play, and caught Root around the waist sending her in a tackle to the floor. Pinning her down and sitting straddling over her, she finally had the upper hand. Root flinched at her head hitting the concrete floor. Blood coming from her mouth and nose. She knew she almost deserved it, she had gone against everything Shaw had asked of her. But if only she could explain.

She slid her arms up over her head, looking up at Shaw who had her trapped against the cold concrete.

“Do you need to hit me again?” Root asked “You could shoot me if you really wanted, I understand.”

Shaw looked frustrated, angry that Root was actually being understanding.

“Come on, I can take another hit” Root said, there was something almost seductive behind her dark eyes. Something testing Shaw. 

Shaw looked down at her. Her jaw clenched. Her hand on Root’s throat once again. She had her right there. But she couldn’t do it, of course she couldn’t. One look at her wife’s blood smeared lip and it was over. One look at that face, a face that she wasn’t even sure she would ever get to see again.

Shaw’s hand tightened around Root’s throat. Root let out a small gasp of air. Their eyes were locked.

Root looking at her, with that seductive softness that she had stared at Shaw with since as long as she could remember. Her chest was rising and falling heavily under Shaw.

“Root” Harold’s voice cracked through their impending silence. Shaw’s grip loosened automatically and she glanced at Harold whose eyes had widened at the sight before him.

“Ms Shaw” he said unsure what else to say. “Y-you found us.”

“You’re in on this too?” Shaw growled and Harold averted his eyes to Root.

“If you have a moment, I need you to come and look at this, I think….I think it worked” he said. Shaw looked between Harold and Root and back again.

“What are you talking about? What worked?” Shaw asked. Root put her hand on Shaw’s thigh, and Shaw glared at it.

“That’s what I was trying to tell you, Sameen” Root said softly. Shaw stared at her, waiting.

“Can I get up?” Root asked lifting an eyebrow.

“I’l leave you to it” Harold’s voice added. “But Ms Shaw, unless this is some kind of very backwards thank you, I would consider leaving your wife alive.”

Shaw stared after him as he disappeared back behind the server’s.

“What is he talking about?” she asked and looked towards Root, who was still plastered against the floor, mounted by Shaw.

“In short, I took Samaritan out at the knees, and I was trying to finish off with a not so friendly beheading.” Root said. Shaw looked perplexed.

“What? How?”

“With all that ‘nerd stuff’ that you actively make fun of me about” Root said with a smirk. Shaw frowned.

“But the operatives…” Shaw started.

“Have got nothing without their God calling the shots” Root said. Shaw shook her head in confusion, her brow furrowed.

“But,” she said, and then looked at Root. “You drugged me.”

“Sameen,” Root reached her hand up to Shaw’s face, her fingertips touching her cheek. “I love you.”

“But you drugged me.”

“I didn’t want you to worry.”

“So you drugged me?”

Root just looked at her, her fingers hooked into the neckline of Shaw’s top.

“I didn’t know if you were dead, I didn’t…” Shaw’s voice trailed off, she shook her head trying to shake the sickening feeling from her body from before.

“I’m sorry.” Root said simply. Shaw stared at her.

“No you’re not.” Shaw got off Root, and as Root scrambled to get back up, Shaw grabbed her by the arm and pulled her back onto her feet without looking at her.

“You suck.” Shaw stated, and Root just looked at her adoringly. She moved closer to Shaw.

“I mean can do, plenty of sucking” Root said quietly, lifting her hand to move a stray hair from Shaw’s face, but Shaw slapped her hand away.

Shaw turned to look at Root, and Root could see that look that was still behind her eyes, it was cold and angry but there was something else there too.

“You _hurt_ me, Root” Shaw said. And that was it, pain. Root’s stomach twisted. “I asked you not to do this, and you just completely disregarded me, I was practically begging.”

“Sam it was best for everyone” Root started.

“Not for me.” Shaw said sharply.

“Especially for you” Root replied. “It worked Sameen, they’re gone, for good.”

Shaw just stared at her, the urge to give in and just wrap her arms around Root was irritatingly nudging at her. But she wouldn’t.

“So that makes what you did to me okay, does it?” Shaw asked. Root opened her mouth to speak but nothing came out, she glanced away from Shaw, looking at the floor.

“That’s what I thought.” Shaw said rolling her eyes and turning away from Root. “Bear,” she called out “Let’s go.”

“Sameen, wait” Root said as Shaw walked towards the door. Grabbing her by the arm and spinning her around so they were chest to chest, they looked at one another. For the first time Root didn’t know what to say. She wanted to kiss Shaw, badly, but she knew she couldn’t, not right now.

She knew she had hurt Shaw, but it had worked, her plan had worked, a plan she had been working on for longer than she could remember, a plan that hadn’t had any real grounds until she’d recruited some of the best hackers in the country to help. And they’d done it, taken down a God. For Shaw. And they would be safe now. But she had hurt Shaw, maybe more than she had realised.

Shaw didn’t say anything either, she stayed pressed against Root for a few seconds, waiting for her wife to say something. But when neither of them spoke, Shaw pulled away, whistling at Bear as she disappeared back through the door, leaving Root standing there, by herself.

*

Shaw walked into the bar, she saw Root sitting on the far side, running her finger around the rim of a glass of water. Shaw glanced around the bar, it was like nothing had changed, but everything had. Everything was different now. But it was like it could have been a repeat of the first time, the first time she gave Root a chance, agreed to go on a stupid date with her. She didn’t know how she figured Root would be here, she didn’t know why she had come to Root, she wanted it to be the other way around. But she also knew Root was different now, sometimes she needed space too.

Shaw crept up quietly behind Root.

“Is that vodka?” Shaw asked from behind her, and predictably, Root jumped at the sound of her voice. The bar was practically empty, it was dingy, and dark, and there was barely any sound aside from quiet music playing from behind the bar.

Root looked at Shaw, the faintest smile playing on her lips at those words. She remembered.

“It should be” Root replied. Shaw collapsed into the seat next to Root, waved a hand towards the bartender.

“Whiskey neat” she said “Two shots of vodka for this one.”

Root watched her, she couldn’t take her eyes off Shaw. She felt everything in that moment, everything since the first time they sat here together, the love, the pain, every single thing in between. Every fight, every stitch, every kiss, every glance. The house, the dog, the anger, the smiling, the fear of losing each other, the happiness of the most mundane things. Everything had changed.

“I didn’t think you’d come.” Root said.

“To be honest, neither did I” Shaw answered. She took a sip of her drink and looked at Root’s hands. God she had nice hands. Her fingers were so long and delicate.

“Sam” Root said quietly. Their eyes met. “I am sorry. I never want to intentionally hurt you.”

“I know” Shaw said, she could see it behind Root’s eyes, hell, she could even feel it.

“I just wanted you to be safe” Root continued “ _I_ _wanted_ to keep you safe.”

“I know,” Shaw said “and you did.”

“But you’re upset” Root said desperately searching Shaw’s eyes.

“I’m not upset, Root” Shaw sighed.

“You’re hurt, and angry” Root said “And understandably so, I deserve it.”

Shaw watched her wife, the sincerity, the profound apology, the softness behind her eyes. The tiny smear of blood that was still rimming her lip. Shaw reached for it, wiping it away.

“You didn’t deserve the two concussions I probably gave you” Shaw said her voice low. The corners of Root’s mouth twitched upwards into an almost smile.

“Maybe just a little” she said. “I would have done the same.”

“No you wouldn’t” Shaw said immediately “you’re… too good for me.”

“Agree to disagree, Sameen” Root said her hand finding it’s way onto Shaw’s knee.

Shaw looked at Root’s hand on her knee. She glanced back up at Root.

“You want to get out of here?” Shaw asked. Root quirked an eyebrow.

“That’s my line” she said. Shaw downed the rest of her drink, dropping some money on the counter and holding her hand out for Root.

*

They had barely made it in the door before Root had Shaw pinned to the wall. Their bodies pressed against each other, their lips crashing together. A desperate longing, since at the beginning of this day Shaw hadn’t even been sure if she would see her wife ever again. Whether they ever would have had the chance to do this again. She slid her hands up the back of Root’s shirt, grabbing at her back. Root’s knee driving between Shaw’s legs. Her hands cupping Shaw’s face, keeping her right there, in front of her. The ends of their noses touching. Their breathing heavy. Shaw’s head banged against the wall behind her, she felt Root smirk against her lips, she grabbed at Root harder, nails leaving red trails on her perfect back.

“Wait” Shaw whispered suddenly, against Root’s lips. Root barely pulled back.

“Can it wait?” Root mumbled against her, a hand slipping down around Shaw’s neck. Shaw tried to concentrate.

“What about the machine?” Shaw managed to get out. She felt Root go still, her forehead pressed against Shaw’s. Root didn’t say anything.

“Root,” Shaw said softly “what happened to The Machine?”

“She’s gone.” Root said finally.

Shaw pushed root back by the shoulders so she could see her face.

“What do you mean _gone_?”

Root sighed, it was clear she didn’t want to talk about it, but Shaw pressed her anyway. Root stared at the small gap between their bodies. Shaw studied her face closely, it wasn’t even that Root looked upset, it’s that she seemed melancholic.

“Hey,” Shaw said softly, tipping Root’s chin up so they were looking at each other. “Tell me.”

“There’s not much to say Sam,” Root said. “In order to stop Samaritan, sacrifices had to be made.”

Shaw’s brow furrowed. “So The Machine sacrificed herself?”

“No Sameen, I sacrificed her.” Root said. “I gave her a sword and sent her in to die.”

“But…she was everything to you” Shaw said struggling to understand.

“She was” Root agreed, “but she’s not you.”

Shaw didn’t know what to say. It suddenly hit her, the truth of what Root had done. Root had saved them, all of them, freed them from having to look over their shoulders everyday for the rest of their lives. But what she had done had come at a cost, and that cost was giving up The Machine, her God, her friend, the voice in her head, what had been her other half for years now, that was gone. And for what? To protect Shaw. Because she _had_ chosen Shaw, she had chosen Shaw over everyone, and everything including The Machine.

“Root, I…” Shaw stared at her, in disbelief and amazement. “Thank you.” she said simply.

A smile played at the corners of Root’s mouth.

“Don’t mention it” Root said.

“As if you’d let me get off that easy” Shaw said rolling her eyes. “Thank you” she said again wrapping an arm around Root’s waist pulling her closer, and kissing her lightly on the lips.

“I’m sorry that she’s gone” Shaw said quietly her lips against Root’s.

“Me too” Root said her cheeks wet from tears. “But I’d do it again a thousand times if it meant keeping you safe.”

Their arms wrapped tightly around each other, they held on tightly, not afraid to let go anymore. They had each other, forever. After everything they had been through, it was finally over.

“So this is it?” Shaw asked.

“This is it.” Root replied, her fingers entwining with Shaw’s, a smile playing against her lips, happiness behind her eyes.

“This is us now.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Merry Christmas!
> 
> If you're still here, congratulations. You made it. Through the rollercoaster that was this story, and my hiatus as a human (which I can't apologise enough for, honestly, I am SO sorry). 
> 
> The pleasure has been all mine writing this story, and I am beyond grateful for all of you and your never ending support.  
> It was tough to see this journey come to an end (partially why it took me so long to finish it), but considering it was never destined to be more than a 2 chapter fic about our two favourites getting married in Vegas, I think it did quite well.
> 
> And although this story has come to an end, Coffee & Handcuffs is not, and if you can even bear the thought of waiting around for me to write that one, I promise you, that will be completed too, and it's a lot further away from the finish line. 
> 
> As I promise you a long time ago, this story will have an epilogue, that will be following soon.
> 
> For now, Merry Christmas, I wish all of you the very best and happiest times ahead. Thank you eternally for sticking with me on this. Your support has been life changing to my writing.
> 
> And if you ever want to keep tabs on me:  
> instagram: aishaunfinished  
> youtube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCKNzi8Q8bcNREAZDVdT1YAg

**Author's Note:**

> what can I say...I miss them, and I'm a sucker for Vegas cliches :p


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